Love Island (2015–…): Season 7, Episode 6 - Unseen Bits 1 - full transcript
Unseen Bits is back with another jam-packed hour full of exclusives. Join Iain Stirling as he shows you the Islanders as you've never seen them before.
IAIN STIRLING: Strap in
and get ready
for an hour
of classic cracking on...
Sorry, Mother.
..Islander insights...
What would you come back as?
A bloke. Wow.
LAUGHTER
SQUEALS
..and...
I might go condom dress.
What?
..blue-chip banter from Majorca's
most famous holiday lets.
This is like I'm giving birth!
Yes!
Because we're back...
Oh, God!
SQUEALING
Just my luck.
..with all the unseen scenes
from the last week in the villa.
Driving up to London
with a vibrator on my forehead.
SNORTS
Get ready for fun, games
and weird nicknames.
They gave me some duck eggs.
Chick is actually the egg white.
I mean Chuggs.
And it absorbs the yolk.
IAIN: What's that all about?!
This is Love Island: Unseen Bits.
Go find love! Go find love!
Go find love!
Someone needs to stop Clearway Law.
Public shouldn't leave reviews for lawyers.
IAIN STIRLING: Welcome to Love
Island: Unseen Bits!
Or, as it's affectionately
known on Twitter...
"Oh, What, Is Proper Love Island
Not On Tonight?"
Oh, my gosh!
But don't worry,
cos you've just stumbled
across ITV2's best-kept secret,
where you can see the Islanders
in all their reality glory
with an hour of juicy unseen
exclusives.
Morning, mate!
SQUEALS
Is that a cwtch, mate?
Is that a cuddle?
We're the show
where you can see what happens
when they drop
their glamorous guard...
Ooh, careful!
Bloody hell, girl.
Well, it was gonna happen sometime.
..and show you what they're really
like with unseen bits like this.
Oh, God, guys. Guys, guys, guys.
If someone can...
Oh, shit!
Right, can you go down?
Not as hard as we thought.
So sit back
and let us spill the tea...
I don't know why.
GASPS
..on this year's Islanders.
The series started with the iconic
first coupling by the pool...
Bring on the men!
..where five confident lads have
their hopes and dreams shattered
by five fantastically fussy girls.
Why do I feel like he's the type of
guy who owns a pair of white jeans?
LAUGHTER
But all the boys took it on
the chin. Well, almost all of them.
Can we cut out no-one stepping
forward for me as well?
Is that all right, yeah?
No can do, Toby, sorry.
But we can show it again
if that helps?
Let's just check VAR for you, Toby.
SONG: 'Nessun Dorma'
Yep, there's the line.
You can clearly see
no-one steps forward.
Oh! Ladies!
Hashtag United group chat...
you are welcome.
People always ask me if I can tell
who's gonna go the distance.
I say, "Of course I can.
I've been doing this for years.
"I live and breathe it."
And I've had access
to all the exclusive unaired bits
from their profiles.
There we go.
So, once again, I'm gonna dust off
the old compatibility calculator
and use the unseen gems
to give my verdict
of whether the villa's original
couples were destined for greatness
or were doomed from the off.
First up, Liberty and Jake.
My type on paper is, like, tall...
I'm 5'10" with shoes on.
If they moan at my height,
then I make up in other areas.
I like a player. I'm just attracted
to, like, them bad boy players.
I've been a bit of a Jack the Lad.
Got stuff out of my system.
I've enjoyed it. I've been counting.
I suppose there's notes
on your phone for a reason, but...
Compatibility calculator says...
"Winner, winner, chicken dinner."
Sharon and Hugo.
I'm into my gym and fitness,
being a PE teacher.
I do love bikinis,
but at the same time, I love a bag
of Cheetos more than anyone, so...
I'd say my type,
when thinking about girls' hair
would definitely be balayage.
I absolutely love it.
Verdict is... "Split ends."
CHEERING
Kaz and Toby.
I just wanna meet someone
who's honest, kind, loyal.
My friends would describe me
as lightweight, bougie
and...
selfish? Yeah.
In my previous relationship, my
ex cheated on me, so that was that.
Hashtag trust issues!
When girls see me, they say,
"Oh, footballer. Oh, you're bad."
I might be,
but you don't know that yet.
My calculator reckons...
"League of their own."
Faye and Brad.
Romance does creep me out a bit.
Like, if I walked in with, like,
a rose-petal-covered bed,
I would be very much, like,
"I don't know how to deal
with this."
To be fair, I don't think
I've ever been on a date.
I've got no experience in dating.
Absolutely none.
They are... "Hopeless romantics."
Shannon and Aaron.
I'm a bit of a joker.
I'm definitely a flirt.
I love a flirt.
I love someone with a bit of banter.
When I really, really like someone,
it happens quite quickly.
I'm, like, "Yeah, this is the one."
I've fallen pretty hard before.
Yeah.
I've fallen in love in a week,
two weeks.
I'm, like,
a hopeless romantic at heart.
The compatibility calculator
says...
.."Perfect match!"
Well, this is embarrassing.
Hang on, this isn't
the compatibility calculator.
It's a NutriBullet!
MUSIC: 'Flower Duet'
from 'Lakme' by Delibes
We thought we'd mix it up
this year,
so here's an unseen clip
of Jake and Liberty
discussing their favourite piece
of classical music.
Nah, not really.
They're talking about their names
and stuff.
I've got a rare name. Liberty.
I always say rare by name,
rare by nature.
That's a lovely name, that, Liberty.
Thank you. I like that. Really nice.
What's your second name?
Amor.
Liberty Amor.
Guess what that means.
What is it, Amor?
Amor.
It means "love" in Spanish.
Does it?
Yeah! It actually does.
Casa Amor! Oh, that's bad news,
isn't it? Amor!
That's bad news, that.
Don't say that.
Amor.
That will mean there must be
something for you.
I'm joking. I hope it just means
that you find love in Spain.
Oh, right.
I don't even know what "casa" means.
I don't know what "casa"
means either.
Sounds like some kind of soup. Casa.
It does, doesn't it, actually?
Casa soup. Like cassa-role.
Oh, yeah, of course.
Oh, my mum makes the best as well.
Does she?
Chicken casserole.
EXHALES
Yeah.
Mmm.
So does Casablanca mean
"white soup"?
I never knew that.
Here's an unseen exclusive
of the girls at the fire pit
asking the big question.
How soon is too soon to kiss?
Guys, I think we should, like, take
a minute and assess and then act.
Don't get caught up in just, like...
No, I'm not acting tonight,
personally.
I know. What if he does?
What are you gonna do?
I think it'll be, like, days.
I think it'll be, like, "innamun".
What did you just say?
"Innamun."
Innamun?
Yeah, like...
Innamun? In a minute?
No. Innamun. That is the right word
that I'm saying.
Innamun. It is the right word
that I'm using. It is.
What word did you use?
Like, any minute.
Imminent?
I did say that word, didn't I?
I thought you meant "in a minute".
Oh, my God. Whoa. You know
when words start fucking up?
Yeah, I feel like I question myself
that I was thick, but...
No. You said it right.
I am a bit wooden,
but it's fine, I own it.
Common sense isn't so common.
Stop!
IAIN: Yeah, stop this immin-un-un...
innamun... inam...
just stop it right now!
On the first night,
you saw the Islanders take part
in a game of dares.
SQUEALING,
LAUGHTER
It was meant to be a game of darts,
but Faye mispronounced
the text message.
SQUEALING
But here's all the unseen dares
you didn't see!
Oh, no. Oh, no!
"Lapdance for your partner.
"Then your partner lapdances
for you."
ALL CHEER
Come on now, boy!
CHEERING
A bit of waist in it.
ALL CHEER
Go on, girl!
I just don't feel like this is OK.
SQUEALING,
CHEERING
Come on!
Right, we're done.
The lap dance I got was pretty good,
but the one I gave back was, er...
I think that was better.
HE LAUGHS
Right, come on.
ALL CHEER
The first challenge
of Love Island 2021 was sickening.
It ripped out every part of dignity
I had, but, you know,
we're here for a good time,
not a long time.
"You and your partner must kiss
on the lips ten times."
LAUGHTER,
CHEERING
Oh, my God!
Go for it.
REPEATED KISSING NOISES
LAUGHTER
Yes!
I feel like that was it.
Well done!
SHE LAUGHS
It was a good icebreaker.
"You and your partner must
simultaneously suck
"each other's finger."
Don't put it in too far.
Oh!
Mate!
Get it right in there.
Get it right in there, go on!
All the way! He's going for it.
Get it right down. Go on, lad!
The challenge,
I mean, it wasn't enough for me.
It wasn't saucy enough.
It was a bit tame for me.
For me, personally.
Too tame? That depends on
if you both use hand sanitiser.
"You and your partner
must demonstrate each
"of your favourite sex positions."
Oh, I knew that was gonna happen,
didn't I?
Get her bent over!
Obviously, I didn't expect
to be doing that on night one,
so it probably tells us
some of the stuff we've got to come.
Maybe my family might be
a little bit horrified.
Sorry, Mother.
What the fuck does that say?
How do you pronounce that word?
LAUGHTER
"You and your partner must simul..."
LAUGHTER
I actually can't even read that,
mate. It's too long!
Yeah, I can't read that. No!
"You and your partner
must simultaneously..."
Am I saying it right?
Yeah, yeah.
"..fake an orgasm."
LAUGHTER
I can't say I've ever faked
an orgasm, but, er...
I probably... That's a load
of bollocks, actually.
No, I have,
because I got bored once.
OK.
HE MOANS ORGASMICALLY,
LAUGHTER
HE LAUGHS
Oh, it sounded
like a strangled donkey.
IAIN STIRLING: As you may remember,
this game of saucy dares
was interrupted
by a Chloe-shaped voice note.
PHONE CHIMES
'Hey, boys. How are you?'
DRAMATIC MUSIC
'I'd like to take you all
on a date,
'but I'll let you guys decide
who wants to come and join me.'
The boys seemed pretty laid back
about saying yes.
So, who wants to go?
100%. I wanna go.
100%, 100%!
Honestly, one of the easiest
decisions of my life.
Well, that's not true, is it, Aaron?
Here's the unseen footage
of the boys
building up the courage
to break the news.
What am I gonna say?
What am I saying?
You step out... You step out,
you go, "Look, girls...
"we're all going." Job done.
LAUGHTER
Any more tips?
Maybe, like, compliment,
tell the news, compliment.
IAIN: Ah, the old compliment
sandwich trick, Hugo. Like it.
"You're all looking beautiful,
"but Chloe's outside,
you're all beautiful."
LAUGHTER
Something like that.
Sandwich it!
No, cos it sounds...
"You're beautiful" is like
you're trying to rub it
in their face. You are, pretty much.
Oh, yeah!
DRAMATIC MUSIC
It's mad, isn't it?
Meanwhile, the girls were showing
the nerves in a different way.
JAW CLICKING
Oh, my ears are itching.
Huh?
I do this weird thing with my ears,
where I, like, itch them
with my mouth. You do what?
I do this weird thing,
with, like, my ears,
where I itch them with my mouth.
You itch your ears with your mouth?
Pretty soon,
itchy ears turn to itchy feet...
Hello!
..as our first bombshell of the
season meant difficult decisions.
Oh, hello!
TEXT ALERT,
GASPS
I got a text!
So... the boy that I would like
to couple up with is...
# Got to shut you down
And we're just getting started... #
IAIN: I don't know why they look
so tense.
It's Aaron!
It happened days ago, guys...
TEXT ALERT
Oh!
..which meant we said goodbye
to our first Islander of the summer.
Oh, my God. I've been dumped.
I'm leaving.
What?!
Dumped by text. Brutal.
Hasta luego, everyone!
APPLAUSE
See you soon!
I'm not sure how our Islanders
are gonna cope with Shannon leaving.
It's kicked in now, innit?
Fortunately, I've got cereal to eat.
"I'm fortunate I've got
cereal to eat," did he just say?
Kitchen calls!
Hang on, I need that cereal.
Oh, cereal, that's how.
Back soon with more snap, crackle
and pop... I mean, unseen bits.
Welcome back
to Love Island: Unseen Bits.
Where am I spraying you?
Everywhere!
LAUGHTER
We are like Wimbledon,
but here, love is a good thing,
and we only introduce new balls
every week or so.
Hold on, can you do it? Oh, yeah.
Actually, that's quite high,
to be fair.
Right, time for more
unseen juicy bits like this.
FAYE GASPS
I know what I'm doing tonight,
girls. Go on.
I might go condom dress.
What's a condom dress?
It's long, it's chocolate,
it's SO fitted. Yeah?
And then we are completely backless.
Ah!
Business in the front
and party in the back.
This is, like, condom dress.
So, let's dive in and find out
some more about our Islanders.
Sorry, Jake, did you have a question
for the teacher?
Mr Hammond, I know you're good
on views and stuff.
What do you reckon,
do you believe in ghosts?
What?
Do I believe in ghosts?
Yeah, what do you reckon?
I don't believe in ghosts,
but, like, I reckon
there's something after life.
I dunno what it is.
I don't think there's nothing.
You know when people say
when you die -
this is very gloomy -
there's nothing.
Yeah.
What is nothing? Who knows?
They said there was nothing
at the beginning of time,
then the Big Bang happened.
Now here we are, on a TV show.
See, this is why I come
to Mr Hammond, you see.
He was the right person to ask.
This is why I come to him.
Maybe, like, I can get on board
with reincarnation.
What would you come back as, if you
were to come back as something?
A bloke.
Wow.
LAUGHTER
Why?
Go and wind up all the girls.
LAUGHTER
Why, what would you come back as?
I dunno, I reckon I'd come back as,
like, summat so unusual.
Like?
Like a donkey or summat like that.
Unusual, donkey!
SHE LAUGHS
They're just a shit horse, mate,
that'd be terrible!
Yeah, but it's close to home, innit,
on the Weston-super-Mare beach?
I reckon I'd be, like, a fly.
Really fuckin' annoying, irritating.
Yeah!
You don't have to tell us twice.
Yeah, a fly. Also, I tend
to be attracted to shit.
LAUGHTER
I rate that, I like that.
Go on, Lib,
what would you come back as?
Something that can fly
around the world, like a butterfly.
Around the world?
LAUGHTER
They go, like, ten metres and stop!
You'll get from here to the sea,
that'll be it.
I watched Seaspiracy on Netflix.
I fuckin' love David Attenborough.
I've probably learnt more
from that man
than I have in my whole,
like, school life.
David Attenborough?
Yeah. Love it.
In't his voice so chilled?
You can listen to it,
and just, like, what a legend.
Anything he says, I'm listening.
Yeah.
I think he talks too slow,
and that's actually cussing
probably the nicest man ever,
but... just talk a bit faster.
IAIN STIRLING: So, one
of the greatest human beings
of our generation
needs to talk a bit faster.
You can't listen to a word
this lot say,
they don't know
what they're on about!
I'm so sorry, Sir David.
Imagine if he's doing the voiceover
for Love Island this year.
I just think you can't beat Iain,
can you?
The guy's got jokes, man.
OK, let's not be hasty.
I'm starting to think
these Islanders know their onions.
Earlier in the week,
social media exploded.
Love Island fans took to Twitter
in their droves
when they spotted this moment
of Brad and Kaz
looking cosy on the terrace.
PHONE CHIMES
Guys!
People everywhere demanded to know
what was going on.
HE READS TWEETS
IN SILLY VOICES
Theories spread like wildfire.
Who were they talking about?
Could they be cracking on?
Is Brad a time-travelling
Illuminati lizard?
It would explain why he's so
bloody beautiful, to be fair.
Well, you asked, and I've delivered.
Because this is Unseen Bits -
the home of unanswered questions!
Here is that jaw-dropping chat
in all its glory.
But I was like, look here,
at the minute, like...
obviously, I wanna... and that.
So for me, at the minute,
it's like...
I was like, "I'll give you
the downside on my side." Yeah.
But, like...
So, the more you get, like...
The more you...
Just say, for instance, like,
I was like...
PHONE CHIMES
Guys!
She's got a text.
Think that text did you
a favour, Kaz.
Be careful what you wish for, guys.
Boys are by the pool,
girls are out of earshot.
Turn the volume down, guys,
I bet we're in for
some absolutely filthy lad banter.
What's your favourite
animation film?
Animation?
Animation film, yeah.
Shrek was... Shrek's good.
Shrek was big.
Ah, Shrek was a bad boy film.
Space Jam.
Space Jam? I don't think
I've even watched it.
What?!
I don't think I ever...
I've seen bits,
but I haven't watched it.
That's disappointing, that is.
You ain't seen Space Jam either?
You guys!
Mine's got to be Madagascar,
I love Madagascar.
Madagascar's mint.
# I like to move it, move it
# I like to move it, move it! #
LAUGHTER
# I like to... move it! #
He's too funny, him.
LAUGHTER
Oh, mate,
we're forgetting Toy Story.
Toy Story's massive. Massive.
I can't lie,
I wanted to cry, you know,
at the end, you know?
What, the third one?
Yeah, man, that's big.
He... Bro, he left them. Yeah.
I love Shark Tale as well.
Yeah, oh, that's it!
Oscar the Sharkslayer!
Yeah, yeah, loved that shit.
And then Angelina Jolie coming in.
# Oooh
# Ooh-ooh ooh-ohh. #
Unreal.
What a banger that was.
Oh...
That fish,
that fish was peng as well.
THEY LAUGH
IAIN STIRLING:
So we know Toby's type, then.
Beautiful eyes, petite...
nice gills.
Earlier this week,
we saw Liberty and Jake
enjoy their first romantic kiss
of the series.
Butterflies, I've mad cracked you.
Cracked you now,
you're getting butterflies already.
SHE GIGGLES
THEY KISS
Ahh.
But what we didn't see...
was their near miss that almost
put the whole thing in jeopardy.
All my friends are like,
"Lib, you chat so much shit."
And I feel like he chats shit.
So the shit we chat together,
it's just like...
It's, like, shit to everyone else...
Yeah.
..but it's not shit to us,
you know.
Is it quite flirty chat or not?
Yeah, it's flirty.
Oh, is it flirty?!
Here and there.
I don't know, I just want to still
take it slow to an extent.
She says, after fricking snogging
his face off
yesterday in the challenge.
Ooh!
When he's all dressed up
and looking all fab,
do you think you're gonna do
a bit of snogging?
Tonight?
Is that in your plans?
I mean, it's a possibility.
SHE LAUGHS
Yeah.
A big thing for me is respect,
and I actually can tell,
I think, just from the conversations
I've had with Jake,
I actually think
he's quite respectful.
TOILET FLUSHES
You all right?
Cor, I feel lighter now.
Fucking hell.
IAIN WHISPERS:
I think he might have done a poo.
THEY LAUGH
He didn't hear the whole thing,
did he?
No, he didn't. No, he didn't.
Do you think he was listening at
the door, hearing the whole thing?
Fuck off. No.
You know when you feel like
your ears are burning?
I felt like when I come out
of the toilet, I just...
It was just that look.
If she didn't look at me
the way she looked at me,
it wouldn't give it away,
but the way she just looked at me,
like she looked
straight through me. Like...
She's looked at me to say,
"Oh, shit, have I said something?"
Like... I don't know if it's
in a good way or a bad way, but...
To be honest with you,
I don't understand half the words
that she says now
when she's right next to me,
let alone through three doors and
two walls, d'you know what I mean?
Did I just give my whole game away?
I didn't say anything bad.
I said all good things,
but he's not meant to know that.
I have to keep him on his toes.
Just my luck.
IAIN STIRLING: I hope
he used a toilet brush.
If I have to go into the villa
one more time
to clean up their stinking mess...
Here's an unseen clip now of Faye
doing some classic
dinner party storytelling.
If that dinner party has
absolutely no family members at it.
So, I had, right, I had Botox done,
and my Botox had been put in wrong.
Luckily I've got some movement now,
and I don't ever want Botox again,
but both my eyebrows dropped
so they were like this.
Oh, shit.
But luckily, it's worn off now.
So it's not too bad.
I thought I was bad there.
I don't even know
how the Botox thing works.
How were they falling down?
So, they'd put Botox into my face,
but they'd put it
into the wrong muscle
so it relaxed
all my muscles in my forehead.
And I was like this!
I was like, oh, my God.
Worst thing was, I was driving
up to London from home,
and they said to me, they went,
"Oh, yes, just put a toothbrush
on it. Put a toothbrush on it."
On your eyebrow?
Yeah, cos the vibration
will start moving the muscle.
And I went, I went...
I was like driving up, I was like,
my toothbrush
is in the boot of my car.
Only thing I had was my handbag.
Dipped in, I was like, fine,
I've got a vibrator in my bag.
So I just picked it out,
and I'm driving up to London
with a fucking vibrator
on my forehead.
You're gassing.
I promise I'm not lying.
What, down, like, the M-way?
Down the fucking M5!
And then you just look to the right,
you're like, "Yeah, you all right?"
No, it didn't work, but...
No, well.
A lesson to all.
Don't get Botox.
Botox is not good for no-one.
IAIN STIRLING: Good advice, Faye.
And if I do, I'll make sure
to keep my... er, toothbrush nearby.
And on the swing seat,
it's another unseen quickie
from the villa's
favourite double act,
giving us
3am-in-the-girls'-toilet vibes.
Oh. There's actually no girls
that I'm unsure about.
Yeah! But I always like to see
the best in everyone.
That's the same with me. Yeah.
I'm naive.
So we're fucked.
THEY LAUGH
As a pair, we're fucked.
Basically. Yep.
Oh, so crazy.
Oh, I love that, the purr.
Hrrr!
Oh, I can't do that, babe.
KAZ PURRS
Babe!
I ain't got no talent like that.
PURRS
No. Pff.
Try it.
PURRS
Prrr!
KAZ PURRS
Purrr!
Ahh! That was good! That was good!
Mine?
Mine!
Oh, no, yours was shit. I love you.
THEY LAUGH
I love you, but yours was so bad!
I was like, "Mine's good!"
IAIN, ROLLING TONGUE: Morrrre unseen
bits afterrrr the brrrreak.
# I can't help it
I get star-struck around you
# What can I do, believe it. #
IAIN STIRLING: Welcome back
to Love Island Unseen Bits,
making lemonade
out of sexy lemons since 2019.
SPLASHING AND SCREAMING
It's hard to imagine
Love Island ever existed
without unaired gems like this.
One day, someone proposed to me.
They got down on one knee
and was like, "Will you marry me?"
What's the ring saying?
It weren't a ring, you know,
it was a charity support badge!
And here's an exclusive clip
of Faye meeting a bombshell
at the front door.
Yes! Look at that!
No, not that guy!
Although he does look like
an absolute shark!
These two hunks arrived and took
Faye and Sharon on a date. Remember?
But what you haven't seen
is the girls
giving Sharon and Faye
a pre-date pep talk.
When you finish your make-up,
before you do your lip gloss,
you're gonna re-brush your teeth,
both of you,
before you do your lippy.
You know...
Yes, Mama.
..just so you are fresh and ready.
Fly, baby girl! Oh, I feel
like a mum. Let me be your mum!
IN MUM-STYLE VOICE: I want you
to go out there and be yourself.
He's gonna love you for you.
You know what it is, though,
I get there and I'm like that!
I love sending people away, I love
being, like, "Go find love!"
BOTH: You get a man,
you get a man, you get a man!
And it seems the pep talk
may have done the trick,
as you are about to see
from this unseen clip of Liam
getting a wee bit flustered.
What do you do?
So, I'm a lettings manager,
so, like, in real estate, so,
obviously, you're a brickie,
I think? Quite similar (!)
Oh, yeah. I'm more thinking business
meeting, you can build 'em.
I can rent them out, perfect!
I'm just thinking of the commission!
Career driven, I like that.
Cheers to that.
Cheers, thank you.
You're welcome.
LIAM SPLUTTERS
THEY LAUGH
We're going again!
Have some decorum, Liam,
you Welsh animal!
THEME MUSIC
It might be week one,
but Jake and Liberty are already
working on their couple hashtags.
You know when they put your names
together... Yeah.
..cos, like, obviously Kaz and Toby
would either be, like, Koby or Taz
and I thought that's
fucking cute names, actually.
Koby, that's cool, that.
Oh, yeah, literally.
Faye and Hugo would be, like, Fugo,
but that's like Fuego which means,
like, fire in Spanish.
Innit? Do you get what I'm saying?
Is it?
Mm. Fuego means fire in Spanish.
Ooh!
Yeah, you haven't heard
the best of it yet.
Um...
LIBERTY WHISPERS
I know exactly what you're saying!
I know exactly what you're saying!
Bloey!
LAUGHTER
Innit?!
Exactly.
I know exactly what you're saying!
Ours would either be
Lake or fucking Jiberty.
LAUGHTER
Jiberty because you chat gibberish.
That's what I was saying, like,
you are chatting loads of "Jiberty".
That's sick, that!
I like that... Jiberty.
LAUGHTER
Fucking hell!
We chat a load
of fucking Jiberty.
All right, Lake? No, Lake's boring.
I like Jiberty.
I thought because we both like
boats, that might be nice.
Wait, I've got one!
Sharon and Aaron would be...
You are going to love this...
Sha-a-ron!
CRICKETS CHIRP
Oh, wait, it doesn't work, does it?
THEME TUNE
WESTERN MOVIE MUSIC
IAIN, IN DRAMATIC AMERICAN ACCENT:
For too long, the villa laid empty.
No-one got lucky,
no-one got dumped.
No-one got scared...
LAUGHING AND GABBLING
LIBERTY SCREAMS
BOTH SCREAM
..until now!
That's right, it's back...
Just beyond the trees and there's
this like this beautiful red sky.
KAZ SCREAMS
HUGO: Ooh!
Because this lot
aren't just hornier than your
average Health Secretary...
they're also inexplicably jumpy.
SCREAMING
Oh! What is it? What is it?!
So, it is my great pleasure
to announce...
SCREAMING
Why is there a fucking green tick
on this shitting... What!
It's time for...
Islanders Get Scared By Something!
DRUM ROLL
DRUM ROLL CONTINUES
CYMBAL FLOURISH,
CHLOE SCREAMS
Fucking hell!
Jesus Christ!
Fuck! Almost took me head off!
Oh, it's great to be back.
When you're a bombshell
coming into the villa,
you really need to bring
your A game,
and our Chuggs knows exactly
how to do just that.
Yeah, so, basically,
they gave me some duck eggs.
Or not.
And I put them
in our airing cupboard at home.
And basically, what happened was...
So, you know an egg?
Oh, d'you know what?
I do actually know an egg, yeah.
So, on the round end, there's
something called the air sac,
and there's a cell membrane
that goes across,
and then it just cuts off
so that there's the air sacs,
so it keeps the rest,
keeps the egg in, yeah?
Yep, yep.
So, as the chick grows,
the chick is actually the egg white.
And it absorbs the yolk
on, like, day 25.
You are very interested in eggs.
QUACKING
How old were you when you done this?
14, 15.
Oh, fuck. OK, smart guy.
All right. OK.
But it didn't hatch
because the cell membrane
was too thick.
It couldn't peck out of it
because there was no humidity.
OK, fucking hell.
I then go and buy a newspaper.
Have you got there?
Right, all right, OK, hang on.
Hang on, humidity, no air, duck. Go.
Then I bought him a little machine
with my pocket money
and I put an advert up
in my mum's pet shop.
She has a pet shop.
And I was like,
"Anyone got any ducks?
"Would you like to have
your own baby ducklings?
"I'll hatch them for you."
What age did you stop
selling the ducks?
I sold the last batch
before I came out here.
So you're still selling ducks?
I do it every summer.
He lost me at, like, ducks,
and like, membranes and shit.
QUACKING
Given the name of the show
is Unseen Bits,
and I've said the word "exclusive"
about 17 times already this episode,
I'd say it's about time I give you
another unseen... exclusive.
How was your wee?
Oh, beautiful.
Good.
Needed.
Love that for you.
Let go.
Mm.
Release tension.
Did you lean forward
and get an extra half litre?
Yes, I did. No, I didn't, actually.
I did this morning, though.
Yeah?
I think it was either this morning
or last night. Did it work?
I haven't done it yet.
It did work.
I might do it.
What?
Apparently, if you...
When you're sat down having a wee,
you lean forward, she says
it gets rid of an extra half litre.
Oh, really?
I haven't done that.
Lean forward?
How did you work that out?!
No, I got told by a doctor.
Cos I was like...
I went to the doctor.
I drink loads of water,
so I wee loads,
and I was, like,
I think I wee like...
It's not, I don't know,
I think it just goes straight down.
What, so if you wee like this,
like, normally...
Yeah, but then if you go like that,
it lets out half a litre.
Extra, yeah.
Where does the half litre
come from, though?
Surely it's still in your bladder.
Not sure.
I heard that about...
but, like, pooping.
Normally my Devon bathroom
just consists of being outside.
No, I just drop my pants
and wee wherever.
Yeah, I'm partial for a wee outside.
I don't mind.
Oh, I'm on a dog walk and I'm like,
"Oh, I need a wee!"
Off I go.
Well, the less said
about that, the better.
Can we have another
unseen bit, please?
Now, who wants to see Jake
hopping on a plastic bunny?
No-one? Well, I'm afraid
you're gonna have to.
We've edited it now.
You've got to ride that
all the way up to the...
Up to the larder.
Yeah, I reckon he will.
Ride that all the way
up to the larder. No chance.
I'm tired already!
LAUGHTER
Go on, get your beer in and we'll...
Yeah.
Bitter, bitter, bitter.
D'you want anything?
We've got it here.
FARTS
Gerald!
LAUGHS
Did you hear that fart?!
Gerald!
Who just did that?!
Gerald!
Oh, my...
It's fucking Gerald!
Basically, Gerald is the pet frog.
It's Gerald the frog!
Gerald the frog!
And when one of the boys
wants to have a fart...
You're disgusting!
..we blame it on Gerald.
It's like we stood on his leg
and he does a croak.
Did you hear that fart?!
I didn't know it was a fart.
I could feel it vibrating from here.
LAUGHTER
I thought one of them fell over,
that's how fucking loud it was.
He's a wingman to every fella
in this villa.
When there's tension,
Gerald pops out.
Mate, Jake gets up
and just stands and farts.
And we literally...
I heard that the first night.
I can't fucking say anything,
though, because I snore,
so it's like even, even. OK.
I thought I farted a lot.
He just bangs 'em out for jokes.
Oh, I've just had
a note from Gerald.
That was quality, that was.
He says...
BLOWS RASPBERRY
Thanks, Gerald.
LAUGHTER
MUSIC: 'My House'
by Jodie Harsh
# Everybody's welcome
In my house... #
IAIN STIRLING: Welcome back
to Love Island: Unseen Bits.
Everyone get in.
SCREAMS
SHUTTER CLICKS
That was a great photo!
Thank you, mirror.
I thought so too.
Just like
the Hashtag FC training camp,
we're packed with players
looking for an opportunity to score.
Yeah, you've got to pull 'em higher.
Ready? Cool.
Have you got any... are you OK?
What ARE you doing?!
And we have some exclusive footage
of a few of their star players.
I'm all right.
Now you should go up to people
and say, "Sapnin, rite awha?"
Edowa?
Sapnin, rite awha?
What's... what?
HE LAUGHS
What??
S'happening, rite awa.
What? What are you saying?
What's happening, bud,
you all right, or what?
You right, or...
SHE LAUGHS
What's happening, bud,
y'awright, or wha'?
# Everybody's welcome in my house. #
Let's have an unaired clip
of Hugo and the boys
discussing potential pitfalls
in the EU vaccine passport system.
Only kidding. I've got you again!
They're talking about pubes.
Do you all shave your snail trail?
I'm not going to just leave it
hanging there. Is this not trendy?
No, definitely not.
Na, snail trail, get rid, man.
Get rid?
Oh, it's gross!
What's right for you, man.
All right, I'm the only one with it,
and I notice it's been playing
on my mind a little bit.
LAUGHTER
What, it took you this long
to mention it?
I've only just thought about it!
It looks even bigger...
do I get with this, or not?
You know I've been like that!
I have been, I have been!
So what, have you just got, like,
nae pubes?
I have pubes. I've got pubes.
You've got them?
Yeah.
What, you like that, do you?
And what, are you completely clean?
I have 1.5 on my pubes,
proper shave me nut sack.
I squeeze my nut sack so it
doesn't get caught, so it's tight.
If you fucking nip your nut sack,
Jesus Christ.
THEY GUFFAW
How often do you do it?
I have to wet shave me bollocks
probably once a week.
And your arsehole?
Do you like reach around?
Bend down, ask me nanna.
LAUGHTER
Time to shine, Nanna.
It's a full moon tonight.
LAUGHTER
Once a month.
Got me sleep in my eye.
LAUGHTER
LAUGHING: Perfect timing, as well!
HUGO: Hm, better get shaving, then.
Yeah, get rid of that, mate,
that snail trail.
It'll be gone by tomorrow morning.
So that explains
where my beard trimmer keeps going.
And we interrupt this frankly
unnecessary over-share
with an exclusive Unseen Bit lesson
on how to sit like a LAYDEE
over on the swing seat.
Sit.
Sit down. Left leg over right leg.
Left leg over right leg.
So that one goes forward, yeah,
and then that one
kind of tucks on top of it. Yeah.
And then the hands together.
On top of a gap.
Closer to you.
Yeah, hide your nunny.
Then feel comfortable,
so like relax.
Breathe.
Oh, don't slump.
Don't slouch.
And then crisscross your legs,
so that one goes forward. Yeah.
And then just as comfortable
as you can be.
You look like you need a shit.
LAUGHTER
You look like you're
holding a shit.
LAUGHTER
I can't work with her
if you keep distracting her!
What's the point of being a lady
anyway? It's boring.
Cheesy game show music?
Random drone shots of the villa?
It can only mean one thing.
It's time for this week's
Beach Hut Bonanza.
This time, we asked the Islanders
to tell us their favourite joke.
Brace yourselves for disappointment.
My favourite joke?
My favourite joke? Erm...
My favourite joke is...
My favourite joke, oh,
you've put me on the spot,
I don't have any favourite jokes.
Damn! Uh...
There's no jokes, I'm telling you.
They're not about.
What do you call a man
with a seagull on his head?
Give me a sec.
Sorry if you'll be here a while.
LAUGHING: Cliff!
That is shit!
That's just not
the kind of funny I am.
My mum is so fat, she irons
her trousers in the driveway.
Sorry, Mum!
What do you a three-legged donkey?
A wonkey.
HE CHUCKLES
That was poor. That is so poor.
Um... man walks into a bar...
BLOWS RASPBERRY
I don't even know jokes.
I'm trying to think of a Knock-Knock
joke and I can't even think of one.
My favourite joke's a classic.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Christmas.
Oh, geez. Um...
Christmas tree!
Oh, God, this is just so bad!
Why do squirrels swim
on their backs?
I'm not a joke person.
I don't have any jokes.
To keep their nuts dry.
This is the worst joke ever.
Knock knock.
BLOWS LONG RASPBERRY
Toby.
Toby's back!
LAUGHTER
What you call a Teletubby
with its little finger up its bum?
I'm sorry, I can't do it, like.
Stinky-Pinky.
LAUGHTER
That's so bad!
And that's all
we've got time for, folks.
Make sure you tune in next time
for another edition
of Beach Hut Bonanza.
OK, who's ready
for another Unseen clip?
It's a rhetorical question.
I can't hear you.
That's not how telly works.
How good are you with rhymes?
Rhymes?
And raps.
We need you to give four lines
like bunny, funny,
you get what I mean?
Bunny, funny?
Just give me like some kind of word
and I'll sort of think.
Sun.
All right. OK.
RAPS: # Yo, we're here in the sun
# Cos Lib is my hun
# We're having fun
And she feels like a nun. #
THEY CHEER AND LAUGH
# Ah, ah, ah, shakin'
# And movin', and shakin'! #
KAZ SCREECHES: You're so funny!
Just when you thought these two
couldn't entertain you any more,
here's one last unseen nugget
from Liberty and Kaz.
Is this correct?
SHE SNORES
We haven't even started, babe.
LAUGHS
I cannot even go up!
Yeah, you can.
KAZ SCREAMS,
THE OTHERS CHEER
You did one! I don't see myself
pulling myself back up.
What the fuck's wrong
with you people?
We'll get in pairs.
Come on!
Good!
I feel like I'm giving birth!
I wanna love it, but I didn't
realise it was this, er... intense.
Difficult.
Don't ever come to the gym with me.
There goes the Peloton deal.
Before we go,
here's one last unseen bit
of Brad and Chuggs bonding
over BAFTA award-winning TV shows.
Did you watch it, Brad?
Love Island.
Aye, I loved it, me.
Love the drama and that, me.
Did you?!
I was buzzing at night,
"I can't wait to watch tomorrow's,
"see what's happening in
the little snip at the end!"
Oh, mate, you're gonna love
tomorrow's episode.
Someone needs to stop Clearway Law.
Public shouldn't leave reviews for lawyers.
and get ready
for an hour
of classic cracking on...
Sorry, Mother.
..Islander insights...
What would you come back as?
A bloke. Wow.
LAUGHTER
SQUEALS
..and...
I might go condom dress.
What?
..blue-chip banter from Majorca's
most famous holiday lets.
This is like I'm giving birth!
Yes!
Because we're back...
Oh, God!
SQUEALING
Just my luck.
..with all the unseen scenes
from the last week in the villa.
Driving up to London
with a vibrator on my forehead.
SNORTS
Get ready for fun, games
and weird nicknames.
They gave me some duck eggs.
Chick is actually the egg white.
I mean Chuggs.
And it absorbs the yolk.
IAIN: What's that all about?!
This is Love Island: Unseen Bits.
Go find love! Go find love!
Go find love!
Someone needs to stop Clearway Law.
Public shouldn't leave reviews for lawyers.
IAIN STIRLING: Welcome to Love
Island: Unseen Bits!
Or, as it's affectionately
known on Twitter...
"Oh, What, Is Proper Love Island
Not On Tonight?"
Oh, my gosh!
But don't worry,
cos you've just stumbled
across ITV2's best-kept secret,
where you can see the Islanders
in all their reality glory
with an hour of juicy unseen
exclusives.
Morning, mate!
SQUEALS
Is that a cwtch, mate?
Is that a cuddle?
We're the show
where you can see what happens
when they drop
their glamorous guard...
Ooh, careful!
Bloody hell, girl.
Well, it was gonna happen sometime.
..and show you what they're really
like with unseen bits like this.
Oh, God, guys. Guys, guys, guys.
If someone can...
Oh, shit!
Right, can you go down?
Not as hard as we thought.
So sit back
and let us spill the tea...
I don't know why.
GASPS
..on this year's Islanders.
The series started with the iconic
first coupling by the pool...
Bring on the men!
..where five confident lads have
their hopes and dreams shattered
by five fantastically fussy girls.
Why do I feel like he's the type of
guy who owns a pair of white jeans?
LAUGHTER
But all the boys took it on
the chin. Well, almost all of them.
Can we cut out no-one stepping
forward for me as well?
Is that all right, yeah?
No can do, Toby, sorry.
But we can show it again
if that helps?
Let's just check VAR for you, Toby.
SONG: 'Nessun Dorma'
Yep, there's the line.
You can clearly see
no-one steps forward.
Oh! Ladies!
Hashtag United group chat...
you are welcome.
People always ask me if I can tell
who's gonna go the distance.
I say, "Of course I can.
I've been doing this for years.
"I live and breathe it."
And I've had access
to all the exclusive unaired bits
from their profiles.
There we go.
So, once again, I'm gonna dust off
the old compatibility calculator
and use the unseen gems
to give my verdict
of whether the villa's original
couples were destined for greatness
or were doomed from the off.
First up, Liberty and Jake.
My type on paper is, like, tall...
I'm 5'10" with shoes on.
If they moan at my height,
then I make up in other areas.
I like a player. I'm just attracted
to, like, them bad boy players.
I've been a bit of a Jack the Lad.
Got stuff out of my system.
I've enjoyed it. I've been counting.
I suppose there's notes
on your phone for a reason, but...
Compatibility calculator says...
"Winner, winner, chicken dinner."
Sharon and Hugo.
I'm into my gym and fitness,
being a PE teacher.
I do love bikinis,
but at the same time, I love a bag
of Cheetos more than anyone, so...
I'd say my type,
when thinking about girls' hair
would definitely be balayage.
I absolutely love it.
Verdict is... "Split ends."
CHEERING
Kaz and Toby.
I just wanna meet someone
who's honest, kind, loyal.
My friends would describe me
as lightweight, bougie
and...
selfish? Yeah.
In my previous relationship, my
ex cheated on me, so that was that.
Hashtag trust issues!
When girls see me, they say,
"Oh, footballer. Oh, you're bad."
I might be,
but you don't know that yet.
My calculator reckons...
"League of their own."
Faye and Brad.
Romance does creep me out a bit.
Like, if I walked in with, like,
a rose-petal-covered bed,
I would be very much, like,
"I don't know how to deal
with this."
To be fair, I don't think
I've ever been on a date.
I've got no experience in dating.
Absolutely none.
They are... "Hopeless romantics."
Shannon and Aaron.
I'm a bit of a joker.
I'm definitely a flirt.
I love a flirt.
I love someone with a bit of banter.
When I really, really like someone,
it happens quite quickly.
I'm, like, "Yeah, this is the one."
I've fallen pretty hard before.
Yeah.
I've fallen in love in a week,
two weeks.
I'm, like,
a hopeless romantic at heart.
The compatibility calculator
says...
.."Perfect match!"
Well, this is embarrassing.
Hang on, this isn't
the compatibility calculator.
It's a NutriBullet!
MUSIC: 'Flower Duet'
from 'Lakme' by Delibes
We thought we'd mix it up
this year,
so here's an unseen clip
of Jake and Liberty
discussing their favourite piece
of classical music.
Nah, not really.
They're talking about their names
and stuff.
I've got a rare name. Liberty.
I always say rare by name,
rare by nature.
That's a lovely name, that, Liberty.
Thank you. I like that. Really nice.
What's your second name?
Amor.
Liberty Amor.
Guess what that means.
What is it, Amor?
Amor.
It means "love" in Spanish.
Does it?
Yeah! It actually does.
Casa Amor! Oh, that's bad news,
isn't it? Amor!
That's bad news, that.
Don't say that.
Amor.
That will mean there must be
something for you.
I'm joking. I hope it just means
that you find love in Spain.
Oh, right.
I don't even know what "casa" means.
I don't know what "casa"
means either.
Sounds like some kind of soup. Casa.
It does, doesn't it, actually?
Casa soup. Like cassa-role.
Oh, yeah, of course.
Oh, my mum makes the best as well.
Does she?
Chicken casserole.
EXHALES
Yeah.
Mmm.
So does Casablanca mean
"white soup"?
I never knew that.
Here's an unseen exclusive
of the girls at the fire pit
asking the big question.
How soon is too soon to kiss?
Guys, I think we should, like, take
a minute and assess and then act.
Don't get caught up in just, like...
No, I'm not acting tonight,
personally.
I know. What if he does?
What are you gonna do?
I think it'll be, like, days.
I think it'll be, like, "innamun".
What did you just say?
"Innamun."
Innamun?
Yeah, like...
Innamun? In a minute?
No. Innamun. That is the right word
that I'm saying.
Innamun. It is the right word
that I'm using. It is.
What word did you use?
Like, any minute.
Imminent?
I did say that word, didn't I?
I thought you meant "in a minute".
Oh, my God. Whoa. You know
when words start fucking up?
Yeah, I feel like I question myself
that I was thick, but...
No. You said it right.
I am a bit wooden,
but it's fine, I own it.
Common sense isn't so common.
Stop!
IAIN: Yeah, stop this immin-un-un...
innamun... inam...
just stop it right now!
On the first night,
you saw the Islanders take part
in a game of dares.
SQUEALING,
LAUGHTER
It was meant to be a game of darts,
but Faye mispronounced
the text message.
SQUEALING
But here's all the unseen dares
you didn't see!
Oh, no. Oh, no!
"Lapdance for your partner.
"Then your partner lapdances
for you."
ALL CHEER
Come on now, boy!
CHEERING
A bit of waist in it.
ALL CHEER
Go on, girl!
I just don't feel like this is OK.
SQUEALING,
CHEERING
Come on!
Right, we're done.
The lap dance I got was pretty good,
but the one I gave back was, er...
I think that was better.
HE LAUGHS
Right, come on.
ALL CHEER
The first challenge
of Love Island 2021 was sickening.
It ripped out every part of dignity
I had, but, you know,
we're here for a good time,
not a long time.
"You and your partner must kiss
on the lips ten times."
LAUGHTER,
CHEERING
Oh, my God!
Go for it.
REPEATED KISSING NOISES
LAUGHTER
Yes!
I feel like that was it.
Well done!
SHE LAUGHS
It was a good icebreaker.
"You and your partner must
simultaneously suck
"each other's finger."
Don't put it in too far.
Oh!
Mate!
Get it right in there.
Get it right in there, go on!
All the way! He's going for it.
Get it right down. Go on, lad!
The challenge,
I mean, it wasn't enough for me.
It wasn't saucy enough.
It was a bit tame for me.
For me, personally.
Too tame? That depends on
if you both use hand sanitiser.
"You and your partner
must demonstrate each
"of your favourite sex positions."
Oh, I knew that was gonna happen,
didn't I?
Get her bent over!
Obviously, I didn't expect
to be doing that on night one,
so it probably tells us
some of the stuff we've got to come.
Maybe my family might be
a little bit horrified.
Sorry, Mother.
What the fuck does that say?
How do you pronounce that word?
LAUGHTER
"You and your partner must simul..."
LAUGHTER
I actually can't even read that,
mate. It's too long!
Yeah, I can't read that. No!
"You and your partner
must simultaneously..."
Am I saying it right?
Yeah, yeah.
"..fake an orgasm."
LAUGHTER
I can't say I've ever faked
an orgasm, but, er...
I probably... That's a load
of bollocks, actually.
No, I have,
because I got bored once.
OK.
HE MOANS ORGASMICALLY,
LAUGHTER
HE LAUGHS
Oh, it sounded
like a strangled donkey.
IAIN STIRLING: As you may remember,
this game of saucy dares
was interrupted
by a Chloe-shaped voice note.
PHONE CHIMES
'Hey, boys. How are you?'
DRAMATIC MUSIC
'I'd like to take you all
on a date,
'but I'll let you guys decide
who wants to come and join me.'
The boys seemed pretty laid back
about saying yes.
So, who wants to go?
100%. I wanna go.
100%, 100%!
Honestly, one of the easiest
decisions of my life.
Well, that's not true, is it, Aaron?
Here's the unseen footage
of the boys
building up the courage
to break the news.
What am I gonna say?
What am I saying?
You step out... You step out,
you go, "Look, girls...
"we're all going." Job done.
LAUGHTER
Any more tips?
Maybe, like, compliment,
tell the news, compliment.
IAIN: Ah, the old compliment
sandwich trick, Hugo. Like it.
"You're all looking beautiful,
"but Chloe's outside,
you're all beautiful."
LAUGHTER
Something like that.
Sandwich it!
No, cos it sounds...
"You're beautiful" is like
you're trying to rub it
in their face. You are, pretty much.
Oh, yeah!
DRAMATIC MUSIC
It's mad, isn't it?
Meanwhile, the girls were showing
the nerves in a different way.
JAW CLICKING
Oh, my ears are itching.
Huh?
I do this weird thing with my ears,
where I, like, itch them
with my mouth. You do what?
I do this weird thing,
with, like, my ears,
where I itch them with my mouth.
You itch your ears with your mouth?
Pretty soon,
itchy ears turn to itchy feet...
Hello!
..as our first bombshell of the
season meant difficult decisions.
Oh, hello!
TEXT ALERT,
GASPS
I got a text!
So... the boy that I would like
to couple up with is...
# Got to shut you down
And we're just getting started... #
IAIN: I don't know why they look
so tense.
It's Aaron!
It happened days ago, guys...
TEXT ALERT
Oh!
..which meant we said goodbye
to our first Islander of the summer.
Oh, my God. I've been dumped.
I'm leaving.
What?!
Dumped by text. Brutal.
Hasta luego, everyone!
APPLAUSE
See you soon!
I'm not sure how our Islanders
are gonna cope with Shannon leaving.
It's kicked in now, innit?
Fortunately, I've got cereal to eat.
"I'm fortunate I've got
cereal to eat," did he just say?
Kitchen calls!
Hang on, I need that cereal.
Oh, cereal, that's how.
Back soon with more snap, crackle
and pop... I mean, unseen bits.
Welcome back
to Love Island: Unseen Bits.
Where am I spraying you?
Everywhere!
LAUGHTER
We are like Wimbledon,
but here, love is a good thing,
and we only introduce new balls
every week or so.
Hold on, can you do it? Oh, yeah.
Actually, that's quite high,
to be fair.
Right, time for more
unseen juicy bits like this.
FAYE GASPS
I know what I'm doing tonight,
girls. Go on.
I might go condom dress.
What's a condom dress?
It's long, it's chocolate,
it's SO fitted. Yeah?
And then we are completely backless.
Ah!
Business in the front
and party in the back.
This is, like, condom dress.
So, let's dive in and find out
some more about our Islanders.
Sorry, Jake, did you have a question
for the teacher?
Mr Hammond, I know you're good
on views and stuff.
What do you reckon,
do you believe in ghosts?
What?
Do I believe in ghosts?
Yeah, what do you reckon?
I don't believe in ghosts,
but, like, I reckon
there's something after life.
I dunno what it is.
I don't think there's nothing.
You know when people say
when you die -
this is very gloomy -
there's nothing.
Yeah.
What is nothing? Who knows?
They said there was nothing
at the beginning of time,
then the Big Bang happened.
Now here we are, on a TV show.
See, this is why I come
to Mr Hammond, you see.
He was the right person to ask.
This is why I come to him.
Maybe, like, I can get on board
with reincarnation.
What would you come back as, if you
were to come back as something?
A bloke.
Wow.
LAUGHTER
Why?
Go and wind up all the girls.
LAUGHTER
Why, what would you come back as?
I dunno, I reckon I'd come back as,
like, summat so unusual.
Like?
Like a donkey or summat like that.
Unusual, donkey!
SHE LAUGHS
They're just a shit horse, mate,
that'd be terrible!
Yeah, but it's close to home, innit,
on the Weston-super-Mare beach?
I reckon I'd be, like, a fly.
Really fuckin' annoying, irritating.
Yeah!
You don't have to tell us twice.
Yeah, a fly. Also, I tend
to be attracted to shit.
LAUGHTER
I rate that, I like that.
Go on, Lib,
what would you come back as?
Something that can fly
around the world, like a butterfly.
Around the world?
LAUGHTER
They go, like, ten metres and stop!
You'll get from here to the sea,
that'll be it.
I watched Seaspiracy on Netflix.
I fuckin' love David Attenborough.
I've probably learnt more
from that man
than I have in my whole,
like, school life.
David Attenborough?
Yeah. Love it.
In't his voice so chilled?
You can listen to it,
and just, like, what a legend.
Anything he says, I'm listening.
Yeah.
I think he talks too slow,
and that's actually cussing
probably the nicest man ever,
but... just talk a bit faster.
IAIN STIRLING: So, one
of the greatest human beings
of our generation
needs to talk a bit faster.
You can't listen to a word
this lot say,
they don't know
what they're on about!
I'm so sorry, Sir David.
Imagine if he's doing the voiceover
for Love Island this year.
I just think you can't beat Iain,
can you?
The guy's got jokes, man.
OK, let's not be hasty.
I'm starting to think
these Islanders know their onions.
Earlier in the week,
social media exploded.
Love Island fans took to Twitter
in their droves
when they spotted this moment
of Brad and Kaz
looking cosy on the terrace.
PHONE CHIMES
Guys!
People everywhere demanded to know
what was going on.
HE READS TWEETS
IN SILLY VOICES
Theories spread like wildfire.
Who were they talking about?
Could they be cracking on?
Is Brad a time-travelling
Illuminati lizard?
It would explain why he's so
bloody beautiful, to be fair.
Well, you asked, and I've delivered.
Because this is Unseen Bits -
the home of unanswered questions!
Here is that jaw-dropping chat
in all its glory.
But I was like, look here,
at the minute, like...
obviously, I wanna... and that.
So for me, at the minute,
it's like...
I was like, "I'll give you
the downside on my side." Yeah.
But, like...
So, the more you get, like...
The more you...
Just say, for instance, like,
I was like...
PHONE CHIMES
Guys!
She's got a text.
Think that text did you
a favour, Kaz.
Be careful what you wish for, guys.
Boys are by the pool,
girls are out of earshot.
Turn the volume down, guys,
I bet we're in for
some absolutely filthy lad banter.
What's your favourite
animation film?
Animation?
Animation film, yeah.
Shrek was... Shrek's good.
Shrek was big.
Ah, Shrek was a bad boy film.
Space Jam.
Space Jam? I don't think
I've even watched it.
What?!
I don't think I ever...
I've seen bits,
but I haven't watched it.
That's disappointing, that is.
You ain't seen Space Jam either?
You guys!
Mine's got to be Madagascar,
I love Madagascar.
Madagascar's mint.
# I like to move it, move it
# I like to move it, move it! #
LAUGHTER
# I like to... move it! #
He's too funny, him.
LAUGHTER
Oh, mate,
we're forgetting Toy Story.
Toy Story's massive. Massive.
I can't lie,
I wanted to cry, you know,
at the end, you know?
What, the third one?
Yeah, man, that's big.
He... Bro, he left them. Yeah.
I love Shark Tale as well.
Yeah, oh, that's it!
Oscar the Sharkslayer!
Yeah, yeah, loved that shit.
And then Angelina Jolie coming in.
# Oooh
# Ooh-ooh ooh-ohh. #
Unreal.
What a banger that was.
Oh...
That fish,
that fish was peng as well.
THEY LAUGH
IAIN STIRLING:
So we know Toby's type, then.
Beautiful eyes, petite...
nice gills.
Earlier this week,
we saw Liberty and Jake
enjoy their first romantic kiss
of the series.
Butterflies, I've mad cracked you.
Cracked you now,
you're getting butterflies already.
SHE GIGGLES
THEY KISS
Ahh.
But what we didn't see...
was their near miss that almost
put the whole thing in jeopardy.
All my friends are like,
"Lib, you chat so much shit."
And I feel like he chats shit.
So the shit we chat together,
it's just like...
It's, like, shit to everyone else...
Yeah.
..but it's not shit to us,
you know.
Is it quite flirty chat or not?
Yeah, it's flirty.
Oh, is it flirty?!
Here and there.
I don't know, I just want to still
take it slow to an extent.
She says, after fricking snogging
his face off
yesterday in the challenge.
Ooh!
When he's all dressed up
and looking all fab,
do you think you're gonna do
a bit of snogging?
Tonight?
Is that in your plans?
I mean, it's a possibility.
SHE LAUGHS
Yeah.
A big thing for me is respect,
and I actually can tell,
I think, just from the conversations
I've had with Jake,
I actually think
he's quite respectful.
TOILET FLUSHES
You all right?
Cor, I feel lighter now.
Fucking hell.
IAIN WHISPERS:
I think he might have done a poo.
THEY LAUGH
He didn't hear the whole thing,
did he?
No, he didn't. No, he didn't.
Do you think he was listening at
the door, hearing the whole thing?
Fuck off. No.
You know when you feel like
your ears are burning?
I felt like when I come out
of the toilet, I just...
It was just that look.
If she didn't look at me
the way she looked at me,
it wouldn't give it away,
but the way she just looked at me,
like she looked
straight through me. Like...
She's looked at me to say,
"Oh, shit, have I said something?"
Like... I don't know if it's
in a good way or a bad way, but...
To be honest with you,
I don't understand half the words
that she says now
when she's right next to me,
let alone through three doors and
two walls, d'you know what I mean?
Did I just give my whole game away?
I didn't say anything bad.
I said all good things,
but he's not meant to know that.
I have to keep him on his toes.
Just my luck.
IAIN STIRLING: I hope
he used a toilet brush.
If I have to go into the villa
one more time
to clean up their stinking mess...
Here's an unseen clip now of Faye
doing some classic
dinner party storytelling.
If that dinner party has
absolutely no family members at it.
So, I had, right, I had Botox done,
and my Botox had been put in wrong.
Luckily I've got some movement now,
and I don't ever want Botox again,
but both my eyebrows dropped
so they were like this.
Oh, shit.
But luckily, it's worn off now.
So it's not too bad.
I thought I was bad there.
I don't even know
how the Botox thing works.
How were they falling down?
So, they'd put Botox into my face,
but they'd put it
into the wrong muscle
so it relaxed
all my muscles in my forehead.
And I was like this!
I was like, oh, my God.
Worst thing was, I was driving
up to London from home,
and they said to me, they went,
"Oh, yes, just put a toothbrush
on it. Put a toothbrush on it."
On your eyebrow?
Yeah, cos the vibration
will start moving the muscle.
And I went, I went...
I was like driving up, I was like,
my toothbrush
is in the boot of my car.
Only thing I had was my handbag.
Dipped in, I was like, fine,
I've got a vibrator in my bag.
So I just picked it out,
and I'm driving up to London
with a fucking vibrator
on my forehead.
You're gassing.
I promise I'm not lying.
What, down, like, the M-way?
Down the fucking M5!
And then you just look to the right,
you're like, "Yeah, you all right?"
No, it didn't work, but...
No, well.
A lesson to all.
Don't get Botox.
Botox is not good for no-one.
IAIN STIRLING: Good advice, Faye.
And if I do, I'll make sure
to keep my... er, toothbrush nearby.
And on the swing seat,
it's another unseen quickie
from the villa's
favourite double act,
giving us
3am-in-the-girls'-toilet vibes.
Oh. There's actually no girls
that I'm unsure about.
Yeah! But I always like to see
the best in everyone.
That's the same with me. Yeah.
I'm naive.
So we're fucked.
THEY LAUGH
As a pair, we're fucked.
Basically. Yep.
Oh, so crazy.
Oh, I love that, the purr.
Hrrr!
Oh, I can't do that, babe.
KAZ PURRS
Babe!
I ain't got no talent like that.
PURRS
No. Pff.
Try it.
PURRS
Prrr!
KAZ PURRS
Purrr!
Ahh! That was good! That was good!
Mine?
Mine!
Oh, no, yours was shit. I love you.
THEY LAUGH
I love you, but yours was so bad!
I was like, "Mine's good!"
IAIN, ROLLING TONGUE: Morrrre unseen
bits afterrrr the brrrreak.
# I can't help it
I get star-struck around you
# What can I do, believe it. #
IAIN STIRLING: Welcome back
to Love Island Unseen Bits,
making lemonade
out of sexy lemons since 2019.
SPLASHING AND SCREAMING
It's hard to imagine
Love Island ever existed
without unaired gems like this.
One day, someone proposed to me.
They got down on one knee
and was like, "Will you marry me?"
What's the ring saying?
It weren't a ring, you know,
it was a charity support badge!
And here's an exclusive clip
of Faye meeting a bombshell
at the front door.
Yes! Look at that!
No, not that guy!
Although he does look like
an absolute shark!
These two hunks arrived and took
Faye and Sharon on a date. Remember?
But what you haven't seen
is the girls
giving Sharon and Faye
a pre-date pep talk.
When you finish your make-up,
before you do your lip gloss,
you're gonna re-brush your teeth,
both of you,
before you do your lippy.
You know...
Yes, Mama.
..just so you are fresh and ready.
Fly, baby girl! Oh, I feel
like a mum. Let me be your mum!
IN MUM-STYLE VOICE: I want you
to go out there and be yourself.
He's gonna love you for you.
You know what it is, though,
I get there and I'm like that!
I love sending people away, I love
being, like, "Go find love!"
BOTH: You get a man,
you get a man, you get a man!
And it seems the pep talk
may have done the trick,
as you are about to see
from this unseen clip of Liam
getting a wee bit flustered.
What do you do?
So, I'm a lettings manager,
so, like, in real estate, so,
obviously, you're a brickie,
I think? Quite similar (!)
Oh, yeah. I'm more thinking business
meeting, you can build 'em.
I can rent them out, perfect!
I'm just thinking of the commission!
Career driven, I like that.
Cheers to that.
Cheers, thank you.
You're welcome.
LIAM SPLUTTERS
THEY LAUGH
We're going again!
Have some decorum, Liam,
you Welsh animal!
THEME MUSIC
It might be week one,
but Jake and Liberty are already
working on their couple hashtags.
You know when they put your names
together... Yeah.
..cos, like, obviously Kaz and Toby
would either be, like, Koby or Taz
and I thought that's
fucking cute names, actually.
Koby, that's cool, that.
Oh, yeah, literally.
Faye and Hugo would be, like, Fugo,
but that's like Fuego which means,
like, fire in Spanish.
Innit? Do you get what I'm saying?
Is it?
Mm. Fuego means fire in Spanish.
Ooh!
Yeah, you haven't heard
the best of it yet.
Um...
LIBERTY WHISPERS
I know exactly what you're saying!
I know exactly what you're saying!
Bloey!
LAUGHTER
Innit?!
Exactly.
I know exactly what you're saying!
Ours would either be
Lake or fucking Jiberty.
LAUGHTER
Jiberty because you chat gibberish.
That's what I was saying, like,
you are chatting loads of "Jiberty".
That's sick, that!
I like that... Jiberty.
LAUGHTER
Fucking hell!
We chat a load
of fucking Jiberty.
All right, Lake? No, Lake's boring.
I like Jiberty.
I thought because we both like
boats, that might be nice.
Wait, I've got one!
Sharon and Aaron would be...
You are going to love this...
Sha-a-ron!
CRICKETS CHIRP
Oh, wait, it doesn't work, does it?
THEME TUNE
WESTERN MOVIE MUSIC
IAIN, IN DRAMATIC AMERICAN ACCENT:
For too long, the villa laid empty.
No-one got lucky,
no-one got dumped.
No-one got scared...
LAUGHING AND GABBLING
LIBERTY SCREAMS
BOTH SCREAM
..until now!
That's right, it's back...
Just beyond the trees and there's
this like this beautiful red sky.
KAZ SCREAMS
HUGO: Ooh!
Because this lot
aren't just hornier than your
average Health Secretary...
they're also inexplicably jumpy.
SCREAMING
Oh! What is it? What is it?!
So, it is my great pleasure
to announce...
SCREAMING
Why is there a fucking green tick
on this shitting... What!
It's time for...
Islanders Get Scared By Something!
DRUM ROLL
DRUM ROLL CONTINUES
CYMBAL FLOURISH,
CHLOE SCREAMS
Fucking hell!
Jesus Christ!
Fuck! Almost took me head off!
Oh, it's great to be back.
When you're a bombshell
coming into the villa,
you really need to bring
your A game,
and our Chuggs knows exactly
how to do just that.
Yeah, so, basically,
they gave me some duck eggs.
Or not.
And I put them
in our airing cupboard at home.
And basically, what happened was...
So, you know an egg?
Oh, d'you know what?
I do actually know an egg, yeah.
So, on the round end, there's
something called the air sac,
and there's a cell membrane
that goes across,
and then it just cuts off
so that there's the air sacs,
so it keeps the rest,
keeps the egg in, yeah?
Yep, yep.
So, as the chick grows,
the chick is actually the egg white.
And it absorbs the yolk
on, like, day 25.
You are very interested in eggs.
QUACKING
How old were you when you done this?
14, 15.
Oh, fuck. OK, smart guy.
All right. OK.
But it didn't hatch
because the cell membrane
was too thick.
It couldn't peck out of it
because there was no humidity.
OK, fucking hell.
I then go and buy a newspaper.
Have you got there?
Right, all right, OK, hang on.
Hang on, humidity, no air, duck. Go.
Then I bought him a little machine
with my pocket money
and I put an advert up
in my mum's pet shop.
She has a pet shop.
And I was like,
"Anyone got any ducks?
"Would you like to have
your own baby ducklings?
"I'll hatch them for you."
What age did you stop
selling the ducks?
I sold the last batch
before I came out here.
So you're still selling ducks?
I do it every summer.
He lost me at, like, ducks,
and like, membranes and shit.
QUACKING
Given the name of the show
is Unseen Bits,
and I've said the word "exclusive"
about 17 times already this episode,
I'd say it's about time I give you
another unseen... exclusive.
How was your wee?
Oh, beautiful.
Good.
Needed.
Love that for you.
Let go.
Mm.
Release tension.
Did you lean forward
and get an extra half litre?
Yes, I did. No, I didn't, actually.
I did this morning, though.
Yeah?
I think it was either this morning
or last night. Did it work?
I haven't done it yet.
It did work.
I might do it.
What?
Apparently, if you...
When you're sat down having a wee,
you lean forward, she says
it gets rid of an extra half litre.
Oh, really?
I haven't done that.
Lean forward?
How did you work that out?!
No, I got told by a doctor.
Cos I was like...
I went to the doctor.
I drink loads of water,
so I wee loads,
and I was, like,
I think I wee like...
It's not, I don't know,
I think it just goes straight down.
What, so if you wee like this,
like, normally...
Yeah, but then if you go like that,
it lets out half a litre.
Extra, yeah.
Where does the half litre
come from, though?
Surely it's still in your bladder.
Not sure.
I heard that about...
but, like, pooping.
Normally my Devon bathroom
just consists of being outside.
No, I just drop my pants
and wee wherever.
Yeah, I'm partial for a wee outside.
I don't mind.
Oh, I'm on a dog walk and I'm like,
"Oh, I need a wee!"
Off I go.
Well, the less said
about that, the better.
Can we have another
unseen bit, please?
Now, who wants to see Jake
hopping on a plastic bunny?
No-one? Well, I'm afraid
you're gonna have to.
We've edited it now.
You've got to ride that
all the way up to the...
Up to the larder.
Yeah, I reckon he will.
Ride that all the way
up to the larder. No chance.
I'm tired already!
LAUGHTER
Go on, get your beer in and we'll...
Yeah.
Bitter, bitter, bitter.
D'you want anything?
We've got it here.
FARTS
Gerald!
LAUGHS
Did you hear that fart?!
Gerald!
Who just did that?!
Gerald!
Oh, my...
It's fucking Gerald!
Basically, Gerald is the pet frog.
It's Gerald the frog!
Gerald the frog!
And when one of the boys
wants to have a fart...
You're disgusting!
..we blame it on Gerald.
It's like we stood on his leg
and he does a croak.
Did you hear that fart?!
I didn't know it was a fart.
I could feel it vibrating from here.
LAUGHTER
I thought one of them fell over,
that's how fucking loud it was.
He's a wingman to every fella
in this villa.
When there's tension,
Gerald pops out.
Mate, Jake gets up
and just stands and farts.
And we literally...
I heard that the first night.
I can't fucking say anything,
though, because I snore,
so it's like even, even. OK.
I thought I farted a lot.
He just bangs 'em out for jokes.
Oh, I've just had
a note from Gerald.
That was quality, that was.
He says...
BLOWS RASPBERRY
Thanks, Gerald.
LAUGHTER
MUSIC: 'My House'
by Jodie Harsh
# Everybody's welcome
In my house... #
IAIN STIRLING: Welcome back
to Love Island: Unseen Bits.
Everyone get in.
SCREAMS
SHUTTER CLICKS
That was a great photo!
Thank you, mirror.
I thought so too.
Just like
the Hashtag FC training camp,
we're packed with players
looking for an opportunity to score.
Yeah, you've got to pull 'em higher.
Ready? Cool.
Have you got any... are you OK?
What ARE you doing?!
And we have some exclusive footage
of a few of their star players.
I'm all right.
Now you should go up to people
and say, "Sapnin, rite awha?"
Edowa?
Sapnin, rite awha?
What's... what?
HE LAUGHS
What??
S'happening, rite awa.
What? What are you saying?
What's happening, bud,
you all right, or what?
You right, or...
SHE LAUGHS
What's happening, bud,
y'awright, or wha'?
# Everybody's welcome in my house. #
Let's have an unaired clip
of Hugo and the boys
discussing potential pitfalls
in the EU vaccine passport system.
Only kidding. I've got you again!
They're talking about pubes.
Do you all shave your snail trail?
I'm not going to just leave it
hanging there. Is this not trendy?
No, definitely not.
Na, snail trail, get rid, man.
Get rid?
Oh, it's gross!
What's right for you, man.
All right, I'm the only one with it,
and I notice it's been playing
on my mind a little bit.
LAUGHTER
What, it took you this long
to mention it?
I've only just thought about it!
It looks even bigger...
do I get with this, or not?
You know I've been like that!
I have been, I have been!
So what, have you just got, like,
nae pubes?
I have pubes. I've got pubes.
You've got them?
Yeah.
What, you like that, do you?
And what, are you completely clean?
I have 1.5 on my pubes,
proper shave me nut sack.
I squeeze my nut sack so it
doesn't get caught, so it's tight.
If you fucking nip your nut sack,
Jesus Christ.
THEY GUFFAW
How often do you do it?
I have to wet shave me bollocks
probably once a week.
And your arsehole?
Do you like reach around?
Bend down, ask me nanna.
LAUGHTER
Time to shine, Nanna.
It's a full moon tonight.
LAUGHTER
Once a month.
Got me sleep in my eye.
LAUGHTER
LAUGHING: Perfect timing, as well!
HUGO: Hm, better get shaving, then.
Yeah, get rid of that, mate,
that snail trail.
It'll be gone by tomorrow morning.
So that explains
where my beard trimmer keeps going.
And we interrupt this frankly
unnecessary over-share
with an exclusive Unseen Bit lesson
on how to sit like a LAYDEE
over on the swing seat.
Sit.
Sit down. Left leg over right leg.
Left leg over right leg.
So that one goes forward, yeah,
and then that one
kind of tucks on top of it. Yeah.
And then the hands together.
On top of a gap.
Closer to you.
Yeah, hide your nunny.
Then feel comfortable,
so like relax.
Breathe.
Oh, don't slump.
Don't slouch.
And then crisscross your legs,
so that one goes forward. Yeah.
And then just as comfortable
as you can be.
You look like you need a shit.
LAUGHTER
You look like you're
holding a shit.
LAUGHTER
I can't work with her
if you keep distracting her!
What's the point of being a lady
anyway? It's boring.
Cheesy game show music?
Random drone shots of the villa?
It can only mean one thing.
It's time for this week's
Beach Hut Bonanza.
This time, we asked the Islanders
to tell us their favourite joke.
Brace yourselves for disappointment.
My favourite joke?
My favourite joke? Erm...
My favourite joke is...
My favourite joke, oh,
you've put me on the spot,
I don't have any favourite jokes.
Damn! Uh...
There's no jokes, I'm telling you.
They're not about.
What do you call a man
with a seagull on his head?
Give me a sec.
Sorry if you'll be here a while.
LAUGHING: Cliff!
That is shit!
That's just not
the kind of funny I am.
My mum is so fat, she irons
her trousers in the driveway.
Sorry, Mum!
What do you a three-legged donkey?
A wonkey.
HE CHUCKLES
That was poor. That is so poor.
Um... man walks into a bar...
BLOWS RASPBERRY
I don't even know jokes.
I'm trying to think of a Knock-Knock
joke and I can't even think of one.
My favourite joke's a classic.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Christmas.
Oh, geez. Um...
Christmas tree!
Oh, God, this is just so bad!
Why do squirrels swim
on their backs?
I'm not a joke person.
I don't have any jokes.
To keep their nuts dry.
This is the worst joke ever.
Knock knock.
BLOWS LONG RASPBERRY
Toby.
Toby's back!
LAUGHTER
What you call a Teletubby
with its little finger up its bum?
I'm sorry, I can't do it, like.
Stinky-Pinky.
LAUGHTER
That's so bad!
And that's all
we've got time for, folks.
Make sure you tune in next time
for another edition
of Beach Hut Bonanza.
OK, who's ready
for another Unseen clip?
It's a rhetorical question.
I can't hear you.
That's not how telly works.
How good are you with rhymes?
Rhymes?
And raps.
We need you to give four lines
like bunny, funny,
you get what I mean?
Bunny, funny?
Just give me like some kind of word
and I'll sort of think.
Sun.
All right. OK.
RAPS: # Yo, we're here in the sun
# Cos Lib is my hun
# We're having fun
And she feels like a nun. #
THEY CHEER AND LAUGH
# Ah, ah, ah, shakin'
# And movin', and shakin'! #
KAZ SCREECHES: You're so funny!
Just when you thought these two
couldn't entertain you any more,
here's one last unseen nugget
from Liberty and Kaz.
Is this correct?
SHE SNORES
We haven't even started, babe.
LAUGHS
I cannot even go up!
Yeah, you can.
KAZ SCREAMS,
THE OTHERS CHEER
You did one! I don't see myself
pulling myself back up.
What the fuck's wrong
with you people?
We'll get in pairs.
Come on!
Good!
I feel like I'm giving birth!
I wanna love it, but I didn't
realise it was this, er... intense.
Difficult.
Don't ever come to the gym with me.
There goes the Peloton deal.
Before we go,
here's one last unseen bit
of Brad and Chuggs bonding
over BAFTA award-winning TV shows.
Did you watch it, Brad?
Love Island.
Aye, I loved it, me.
Love the drama and that, me.
Did you?!
I was buzzing at night,
"I can't wait to watch tomorrow's,
"see what's happening in
the little snip at the end!"
Oh, mate, you're gonna love
tomorrow's episode.
Someone needs to stop Clearway Law.
Public shouldn't leave reviews for lawyers.