Love Island (2015–…): Season 4, Episode 51 - Episode 44 - full transcript

Someone needs to stop Clearway Law.
Public shouldn't leave reviews for lawyers.

Previously on Love Island.

Relationships got back on track.

You make me want to be
a better person.

Give me a hug.

I would not want to be with any
other person in here but you.

I love you and want to be with you.
I love you, too.

Tonight... the babies are back...

..and two islanders must go.

The couple with the fewest votes

will be dumped from the island
tonight.



OK, boys and girls. Are we sitting
comfortably? Good. So I will begin.

When a man and a woman love each
other,

they sometimes share special cuddles.

Special cuddles make you happy and
make you feel tummy tickles.

And, nine months later,

they make you wonder what the hell
you were thinking.

# ARCTIC MONKEYS: Baby I'm Yours

(BABIES CRY)

Please tell me I am still asleep.
This must be a nightmare.

Screaming babies, that is not ideal.

I can hear babies.

I can hear some crying.

Babies. Yay!

I can't wait, I can't wait.
I love kids. I love kids.



Jack Jr! Jack Jr!

They need to feed it, change its
nappies, look into good schools and

bang on about it being on its iPhone
too much.

Sorry, that is a bit later.
I love kids.

I love the fact there are loads of
babies around.

They are crying a lot. They need to
be changed, fed.

That is what it is all about.

Let's go and see our baby!

Excited to look after a crying,
stinking baby.

Oh, my God! A cot!

Oh, my God.

I have always been broody, but I
cannot have babies yet.

I need to wait at least three years.

I cannot believe how excited Jack
and Wes are.

They sprinted out there.

This is your baby.
That is your baby.

Mine is quite weird-looking.

We have a girl.
A girl? Brilliant.

I'm still trying to work out,
as a man

of science, how, without any
portions, I have a baby.

I feel like such a twat.

Oh, my God. Why are you holding it?
Is it a girl?

Yours is prettier.

Josh's is crying.

What's wrong with your baby? We've
already discussed names. Arabella.

I have lived in Dubai. Arab. Bella
means beautiful. Arabella. Get it?

Mate, can you shut it up? Why is it
making that noise?

Here we go. Unbelievable. It is
deafening. It goes through you.

It goes through your head. It is
like somebody has got a pool cue

and stuck it straight through
your earholes.

We can't keep calling her 'it'.

The baby is called Mia.
You are so proud. Yeah.

She has lovely trainers. She's the
coolest kid in here, at the moment.

She is the babe. What is the name of
your baby? Arabella. Arabella.

That is cute, actually. I know.

Parenthood, what are the key
features? Patience.

Haven't got much of that.
Love, isn't it? Unconditional love.

She's going to be a bit sensitive to
the sun. Like her father.

She will need factor 50. We should
put two layers of factor 50 on her.

Ella Louise George. Isn't that
lovely? Lovely, isn't it?

I would like her to be a doctor.
I hope so. Your brains and my tan.

Mate, it is going to be sweltering
in that.

I just want to take pictures of you
guys. You are so cute.

Be quick. This is Prince Cavanagh
Joshua Denzel.

A very cute baby. He is just very
loud. Like his daddy. Very noisy.

Seriously, I would love a little boy
called Vinnie. Oh, my God, please.

No. Please. No because I do not like
that. That's not fair.

That is like me being like,
I want to call it...

We can't have no surfer name like
Brett or Chad.

What would you name a surfer?
I think Reef is cool. Reef? Why?

Just joking. Why? It doesn't look
like a Reef, it looks like a Vinnie.

Vincent. Say hello to our new baby,
Aubrey Crane Fowler.

Aubrey is going to be a surfer when
he grows up.

This is going to be our life one day.
Do you know what I mean?

I will be sitting here like that.
Bloated.

What do you mean, bloated?

Because you will be older. Do I look
bloated now?

You look skinny and sexy now.
When we have a baby...

You think I look bloated now.
Shut up, Sensitive Sally.

Her surname would be Fincham.
Her name is Kimberly Fincham.

What do you want her middle name
to be? Flo. But we call her Kiki.

Do we? I do. Kiki? No.
Let's not call her that.

I am, that is her nickname. I will
call her Kimi.

She such a little, cute baby. She's
called Kimberly now. She's so cute.

I looked like that when I was
little!

NARRATOR: It is true, Dani did look
like that when she was little.

She had a birthmark on her bum that
said 'Made in Taiwan'.

Luckily, there is a doctor in the
house to offer postnatal classes.

The baby looks beautiful. I just
want to make sure that

there are no problems. The ears and
all that. A nicely formed nose

and mouth. Beautiful. Lovely eyes.
Let's have a listen to the heart.

Hopefully, it has a heart as big as
her dad's.

Nice, strong beating heart. Very
good. Feel her tummy.

What are you looking for here?

Making sure that everything is
formed nicely.

No problems with her fingers,
her toes. The pulse is nice.

Making sure that everything is as it
should be.

Very pleased, very pleased.
Congratulations. Brilliant.

Aubrey, all good, mate. Good to go.
I had a very busy morning.

Health checks to do.

I think that was you running away
from responsibilities a little bit.

However, however, I feel like you are
coming into your own.

You are doing me very proud. I am the
one holding the baby. I know.

What a beautiful child.
What is her name? Kimberly.

Kimberly Flo Fincham. I do not want
you to panic.

We just want to make sure that
everything is OK.

Any concerns that you have?

She has been crying a lot, hasn't
she, babe? Crying a lot, yeah.

Is this her dad? This is him, yeah.
Wow. The baby is lovely and healthy.

Doing very well. Any concerns, I am
here 24 hours a day, at the moment.

24 hours a day. You must be working
hard. If you need me, just shout.

Thank you very much. Congratulations.
Thank you.

It is lucky that we have Dr Alex
with us.

We feel like, if there are ever any
issues, we can go to him. Perfect.

Paul and Laura already want another
baby. Think of the advantages.

They will learn to share
and, best of all,

batteries are cheaper
when you buy them in bulk.

I think one boy, one girl, it works.

When you have a car,
two kids in the back.

When you go to theme parks, one of
the kids goes

with the mum and one with the dad.

Everyone wants a boy first before
the daughter.

So he can look after his sister.
Yes, that makes sense.

I have two older sisters and I am
happy. You learn a lot about girls.

It is good. It is good for a boy
to have, like,

loads of sisters
and then you treat women well.

This is a learning curve for all
of us. She has blue eyes like me.

Jack seems to have taken to
fatherhood quite well. He loves it.

He loves kids. Look at him laughing!
Put a little suncream on his head.

He hasn't got a hat and we don't
want him to burn, do we?

A little smudge. Rub it around here.
That is it. There we go.

Who's a good boy? Who's a good boy?

I really love kids. I really, really
do. I really love kids, as well.

I just do not think that motherly
thing has come through yet.

Honestly, I can wait to be a dad,
but I can't wait to be a dad.

Laura, how are you feeling about it?
Chilled, mate. Chilled.

I wonder if we can take them
swimming?

I think everybody will do well.

I think the boys will surprise
themselves.

I think most dads do surprise
themselves.

(LAUGHTER)

What did you do? Did you hit it
on the head?

I need to check something.

I need to check something.
Who thinks they have a boy?

I had a boy and he has a willy.

That is why it is crying,
got the wrong clothes on.

Who has a boy? Does it have a willy?
Yeah, it has a willy.

The girls have nothing, Jack. I have
a girl! You thought you had a boy?

I've got a girl.

Dr Alex unfortunately forgot to check
the sex of the baby.

Therefore, we were going along the
lines of a boy. It was a girl.

I have paid for private healthcare
and for what?

For him to give me a wrong
diagnostic? Diagnosis? Diagnosis.

(CRYING) I can't figure out if it is
yours or mine making the noise.

Get away from my baby. Get your
crying baby away from my baby.

It is probably hungry. It is not
burping. You haven't fed it.

I have just fed her. Oh, shit.

It was quite traumatic. Really.
It gets louder, a lot louder.

At first, it is like... and then...
and then... (SCREAMS)

Bottle? Oh, my God.
It is quite intense, isn't it?

They are like proper babies, crying
all the time.

It is all right, babe. You stay
there and look sexy, yeah?

You stay there, look sexy, you MILF.
I will deal with this. Yeah.

Why are you shaking your head?

I'm just thinking, is this kid even
mine? Is this kid even mine?

The cheek! You can see
his beautiful face. Sssh.

Looks just like his dad.

(CRYING)
I have tried everything.

Oh, hell. I didn't do paediatrics
for a reason. The screaming is why.

I cannot do it!
(CRYING)

Jack plays the name game.

This is Aubrey. Aubrey?

Audrey? Aubrey. How do you not know
your baby's name?

A load of whining brats are given the
task of looking after some babies.

But how are they getting on?

# THE RONETTES: Be My Baby

I'm your dad!

Just take it off
and put it back on again.

Why is it being such a little shit?
Calm down.

Ah, zabenya.

Put his head over your shoulder.

Look at that fit bunch. I love it.

You can't forget behind the ears.

Hello. Hi, girlies. How do I have
a headache already?

I have not had one headache
since I have been here.

A baby comes along,
I have a booming headache.

It is crying so loud, isn't it?
Screams.

What is the point of screaming
so loud?

Some babies do just cry a lot,
don't they?

Keep the babies as far away from me

as possible, especially when they
are crying.

I think they will make good mums,
some of them. It is what dads do.

Sit there and and go, what a great
mum she is!

That is actually what makes a dad.

You just go, she ain't half that
good with the baby.

You just hype your mum up.

Jack loves it. He said, I love kids.
I cannot wait to have kids.

I was like, ooh. I think me and you
need to swap. Alex is like, no, no.

Wes hasn't even eaten, drank
nothing. He has been on it.

Is anybody actually broody, though?
I am so broody.

It is when it does that scream.

I would like to have children, but I
think I would wait a few years.

I am 100% having kids. I can't wait
to have kids. I want to be like 30.

You say that but even when
you are 30,

you will probably say you are not
ready. When are you gonna be ready?

Would you be ready? If it were to
happen to me now, I'd be fine.

Essentially, I would probably want
to wait another couple of years.

This isn't so bad.

Look at Wes go. If I ever have
a plastic child,

I think I have found the ideal
plastic babysitter.

I honestly don't know how some of
my friends have had babies.

Up on the terrace, Josh is holding
the confession cushion and his

confession is, he would rather be
holding a confession cushion

than one of those stupid plastic
babies.

You have been running away. I do not
think you have held him once.

I have held him a few times,
but he cries.

You have been quite an absent
father. Yeah, you know what?

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
I enjoy the responsibility.

So, you are quite hands-on, then.
You can teach Josh a few things.

It is a she. Audrey, yeah. Aubrey.
Sorry, sorry, sorry. Aubrey. Audrey.

No, this is Aubrey. Aubrey. Audrey is
going to surf. Aubrey? Aubrey.

How do you not know your baby's
name?

First of all, you do not know your
baby's gender and then you do not

know your baby's name and you are
telling me you are hands-on!

Good dangling a toy in front
of its face. He? She?

Her name is Aubrey.

New Jack has really surprised me.

He seems like this kind of player
type and very immature.

But, as soon as he became a dad,
he has completely changed.

It is nice to see that support
from him.

I guess some people just take to it
better than others. (CRYING)

Rock him.

Why is he screaming more now?
I do not know how people do it.

It has been half a day
and I am a broken man.

Look at these two. No-one is going to
mess with their kid at school.

'My dad is harder than your dad!'

'My grandad is Danny Dyer. End of.'

I think we are going to be really
good parents.

Yeah, I hope so. It is scary. It is
scary, it is scary.

The thought of, you have two people
to look after.

I will be better at day shifts,
I reckon.

I thought you wouldn't mind getting
up in the night. Can we compromise?

The thing is, though. If I have been
up four times in the night, right,

feeding the baby, I then have to go
to work, the breadwinner.

I want to work. I have to get up.
I need to earn...

As a man, I need to pay the mortgage
and that.

How am I going to do that?
I do want to work.

We cannot live in a world where only
one person works.

It is not like that. It is too
expensive.

I have got quite traditional views
on parenting.

Even though, like, it was just me
and my mum the majority of the time,

my grandad used to always instil
in me,

as soon as you can work, you go to
work. I have grown up with that.

When I have a kid, I want to be
a really fun parent.

I want to do so much fun stuff.
I want them to be so polite.

I want her to be able to tell me
everything. Like I am with my mum.

I want her to be able to, whatever
she has done,

just be able to confide in me.

For me to be able to always give her
the right advice.

It is so important.

You need to look at your mum and dad
as your best mates, as well.

My mum is stricter than my dad.
Really?

My dad is more lenient with certain
things.

He has always been like that, more
lenient than my mum.

My mum is strict. Bless her. He is
brilliant with her.

I feel like I love him more.
I can't believe it.

This morning, he wasn't warming
to her

as much as I wanted him to and now,
he doesn't leave her alone.

He really loves her.

Josh went to write some name tags for
the babies clothes

and he has been gone three hours.

Bet he wishes he hadn't called him
Prince Cavanagh Joshua Denzel.

It is Daddy. You remember we exist!

Do you remember that we exist?
You remember the name of your son?

Hello, man. Do you remember me?
Doesn't even know who you are.

I have got a text! A text! A text.

Why is that fair?

Can someone please tell me, someone
please tell me, a break from what?

Smug as Larry!
I have had this the whole time.

It is all right, a bit of Daddy
daycare. Look at your face.

I do not want to leave him with him.
A well-deserved break.

I have been such a hard-working mum!

I have put heart, soul into baby Mia.
I have spent twice as much time

with her as Megan has.
They have been rewarded.

I love her. I think it will be good
for the boys. They need a bit of

alone time with the babies.

The DBS society has become the Daddy
Daycare Society. I am not the

stay-at-home dad type. Today, you
are. I got this. You lot look

fabulous. Honestly. Goodbye, guys!
Mate, I miss them already. Hey,

little man. Girls, are you excited?
MILFS on tour!

Alex comes a cropper.

Here is your chance to get your own
taste of the Love Island lifestyle,

with a massive £20,000 in tax-free
cash and an unforgettable seven

night holiday in magical Majorca.
You and five mates will stay at this

stunning five-star hotel. Nice! You
will not even have to touch that

£20,000 prize money because breakfast
and dinner are included

and we are chucking in E500 spending
money per person. Actually, I think

I am free that week!
For your chance to win...

Ladies and gentlemen. Love Island is
proud to present a question where

the correct answer is, 'I have
delivered a few vaginal ones.'

Most of the ones I have done are
C-sections. It is amazing.

At that moment, by your actions, you
were there when the baby

came into the world. What is a
C-section? You make your incision

based on where the baby is. You will
make a cut along the lower line of

the tummy. You go through the fat
layer and then you go into

the muscular layer. That is before
you get to where the womb will be.

The uterus, basically.
You have to tear.

You do not want to cut muscle. You
want to tear it. I am so glad that

I'm a male. I have a lot of respect.
Honestly, I cannot commend women

enough. The struggles they go
through. That sounds horrific.

You make a cut along the uterus.
Unfortunately you have to tear that.

You pull it apart until you open
that. Fairly strong.

You properly pull.

Then you get to the sac which the
baby sits in. As soon as you pop

that, you stimulate the baby. You
pop it and then pull that sack.

Then you need to suction all of the
fluid as it comes out. A bit of

blood there. Hopefully, the head is
in a nice position. Hand in.

Scoop the baby out, pull it out.

Then you give the baby to the
midwife. Sometimes you lose litres

of blood and there is a lot of blood
coming out. He has had his hands

in a person, not the other way.
I have made it sound weird. He has

had his hands in people.

Girls, have some drinks.
Whatever it is, it is on me!

Look at that view. I want to dive
in. Jump on one of those yachts!

Ladies, cheers. It is so nice. We
deserve a nice little afternoon out.

It is 2018, the boy should be doing
their bit, shouldn't they? Jack is

a bit of a party boy, very loud.
As soon as you have the baby,

he has been so kind and caring.
It is nice to see that other side

of him. He didn't want to put
the baby down, just constantly

be around him. Make sure he is OK.
I could see Alex has the fear of God

in him. He was laying there with
the baby on his chest. Not really

moving too much. Like it is a piece
of China. The way he cuddles me,

it is like, what is that, Alex?
Tell him to do another role-play!

It makes you fancy them, I think. It
is attractive to see that side. Wes

is so natural. Oh, my God. It is
so cute. Paul is amazing. We were

talking about the names yesterday.
Going to be 32 this year. It makes

me feel a bit, I do not have to
worry about skin. It is a weight

lifted off my shoulders. Being able
to say exactly how I feel. He is not

running to the hills. I totally
trust him. I think he was like, yes,

you can go. I do not need you. I do
not feel the same as any of you. I

have been looking after the baby all
day. There is no father bond there!

Maybe some time alone with him and
Prince, he might seem inseparable

with his son. I reckon they are
trying to take it seriously but I

do not think they are,
I have to be honest.

Back in the villa, Alec spent 30
minutes describing a colonoscopy.

Daddy yoga. (CRYING)
That will stop straight after.

It is called the Simba.
You are amazing!

You are going to be great! I love
you! Every baby started crying.

One baby heard one baby and then
that one cried. Some people are just

not cut out to be fathers just yet.
He is flying.

Paul first. Three, two...

My poor baby!
(CRIES)

Girls, what on earth do you think
the boys are getting up to?

I am actually scared. Do not hold my
baby. Did you actually fall over?

My leg! I am nervous.

I do not want him
to have changed her.

Mum! Didn't see you guys there.
Still alive?

Have you had a nice time? We have
loved it. She hasn't cried, nothing.

She has loved it. Have you had a
lovely time? What the hell have you

lot been doing? A sock there. We
were walking. We went on a stroll.

No, Alex. What on earth has been
going on? Alex tripped, fell. When

you leave them unattended with
no guidance and direction, shit is

going to hit the fan.

Do not write in to Ofcom. These are
plastic babies, people!

Look at him.

What? His arm has come off. His arm
has come off! His arm has come off!

His arm has come off!

The babies have been fantastic.
Let's give them a big hand!

Actually, Prince needs a new elbow,
as well. And arm. Actually,

the whole thing needs replacing.

Night night. I love you, beautiful.

I have really bonded with Kimberly.
She was my little Kiks. It was nice

to have a pretend baby. Bye, Mia.
Goodbye, Arabella. We love you.

It is weird because she is only
a little doll. You connect to it

because you've spent the whole day
making sure she is all right. It is

really emotional. It was a bit sad.
I don't want to talk about!

Say goodbye to your son and tell him
that you love him. It has been

great, mate. I thought I would never
see him again. Internally, I was

tearing up. I was very disappointed.
I had to hold it together as

a strong father would.

It is time to reveal who looked after
their baby the best.

Josh, I wouldn't get your hopes up.

I got a text!

..Jack and Laura. Dani and Jack and
Paul and Laura also passed.

The others have all failed.
What about little Prince?

It is time for a dumping.

The couple with the fewest votes
will be dumped from the island.

After the baby test, the islanders
are discussing who is ready for

parenthood. Jack, you should go for
it. Josh, have you thought about

a vasectomy? I am not saying I am
ready for a baby. I think you are

ready, mate. I feel like you
probably did the most work. I love

babies, I really, really do.
You look lovely.

This lot are having a party.

(MUSIC PLAYING)

I loved the party tonight. The boys
just wanted to show their moves.

Do you know what, I am doing dad
dancing after a day

of being a parent. The party was
really good. Had a little dance-off.

Girls vs boys. I was dancing off
against Dr Alex who was loving it.

It has been a stressful few days.
I enjoyed the party, as did

everybody else. It was great.

The islanders are exhausted.
Looking after babies and making

a dance montage in one day?
I am not surprised.

Texts. You are going on a date.
That was so long ago.

(TEXT ALERT)

I've got a text!

Oh, fuck's sake.

You lot have been voting for your
favourite couple. Now it is time

to watch those islanders sweat.

(TEXT ALERT)

The public have been voting for
their favourite couple. The couple

with the fewest votes will be dumped
from the island tonight.

The first couple at risk is...

..Megan and Wes.

The second couple at risk is...

..Kaz and Josh.

The final couple at risk is...

..Laura and Jack.

The couple with the fewest votes

and therefore dumped from the island
is...

..Laura and Jack.

Well done, guys.

Everyone in here now has had a bond
and is close.

Seeing anybody going now is
horrible. No matter how it turned

out, whoever left, it was always
going to be a shit situation. Their

relationship is blossoming and it
has grown so quickly. Every single

dumping that goes on now cuts a bit
deeper. You look to your left and

right. Megan and Wes, Jack and Laura.
It will be gutting for me to see

any of these guys go. Unfortunately,
it was their time. I need a beatbox.

We are going to miss you, bro.
Laura wants to kiss you, bro.

Anyone that goes now, it kills you.
We were a big part of each other's

journey in here. We always will be.
I just want to say, I am happy.

I am happy that you guys are
amazing. I am glad you are

leaving with her. She is the best
girl ever. She is such a sweetheart.

Him and Laura will do so well.
He has done good.

I didn't think I would ever have
genuine feelings for somebody. That

is all I could ask for. To also have
friends like you guys, too. You get

to leave with an amazing boy. Do you
know what, I am going to miss him.

I got my name back, so that is
a bonus. Every cloud.

What an experience it has been.
Unbelievable. It has happened so

quickly. I have walked away with
this absolute rocket. I couldn't be

happier. Couldn't be happier.

Being dumped from the villa, a bit
of a bittersweet. Made amazing

friends that you do not want to
leave but I get to leave with Jack.

There is the sweet. That is mad,
mate. I am looking forward to

progressing in the outside world.
Well done, everyone.

Our most epic date yet.

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