Living Single (1993–1998): Season 1, Episode 8 - Living Single... with Children - full transcript
This is the third refrigerator
I had to fix this week.
Oh, you could probably
fix it blindfolded.
Nah, I tried that
on the second one
all I got was a nasty shock.
Khadijah, is this
anything we should keep?
Does it smell like we can
get another week out of it?
Well, let's see.
Borderline pile or bad pile.
Hey! Max in the
house! What's up?
‐ What y'all got to
eat? ‐ Oh, try this.
Oh!
‐ Bad pile! Bad
pile! ‐ 'Bad pile.'
♪ Check check check it out
check check check it out ♪
♪ Do what you want
no free position ♪
♪ We are living ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ Single ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Yes we're living
the single life yeah ♪
♪ We are living ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Single ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ And in a '90s kind of world ♪
♪ I'm glad I got my girls ♪
♪ Keep your head up ♪
♪ What? ♪
♪ Keep your head up ♪
♪ That's right ♪
♪ Whenever this life get tough ♪
♪ You gotta fight ♪
♪ With my homegirls standing
to my left and my right ♪
♪ True blue ♪
♪ It's tight like glue ♪
♪ We are living ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Single ♪
♪ And in a '90s kind of world ♪
♪ I'm glad I got my girls ♪
♪ Haa ♪
‐ What's a five letter
word? ‐ For what?
Doesn't matter? I don't
read the clues. Pfft.
Morning.
Hm, sleepin' past noon
must have been
a pretty good date.
It couldn't have been that good
or she won't be wakin' up here.
You know, Maxine
sleepin' on strange sheets
may be your idea of a good time
but mine is a little
more romantic.
Readin' each other poetry
listenin' to chamber music
sharin' a laugh over
a glass of pinot noir.
‐ Since when? ‐ Since Patrick.
Girl, you've been goin' through
a lot of changes for that man.
Cookin' his favorite
food, goin' to art exhibits.
Coverin' up your breast.
Ooh. Sounds serious.
Well, it is.
I mean, Patrick
is not just any man
he's that rare combination
of fun, sophistication
and financial security.
Your three basic man groups.
Well, I hope this isn't
too technical for you ladies
but I'm gonna have to
replace the refrigerator coil.
Ah. Is the Freon level
below factory specs.
You've been bonin'
up again, huh?
Well, as you may well
know those little devils
can be very tricky to fix.
Sorry you gotta work
on Sunday, Overton
but I'm not gettin'
behind that fridge.
Well, it ain't like I
got nothin' else to do.
Oh, where's Kyle?
Oh, he's with his kid from
the Big Brother Program.
He's gonna teach
him how to be a man.
Yes, well, I hope
Kyle's takin' notes.
‐ Hi, I'm Patrick.
Is Regine in? ‐ Hi.
'Uh, yeah, she's..'
Hi, Patrick, I'm Khadijah,
nice to finally meet you.
And this is Overton.
He was just leavin' to
go get a refrigerator coil.
Careful. Those
things can be tricky.
I like him.
Well, come on in.
Oh.
Patrick.
You devil, droppin'
by unannounced.
Oh, and me lookin' such a mess.
You should have seen
her 10 seconds ago.
‐ Well, I think you
look great. ‐ Oh.
These‐these are for you.
I was gonna have 'em delivered
but I wanted to see the
look when you got 'em.
‐ Oh. ‐ Do you
have any brothers?
Alright, ignore my
desperate roommates.
Uh, can I get you some coffee?
No, s‐sorry, I can't stay, I
have to pick up my daughter
from dance class.
Well, um..
It's‐it's nice to meet you all.
‐ I'll call you later.
Okay? ‐ Okay.
Got a cousin?
Young uncle?
Ooh, Regine, why didn't
you tell us he had a daughter?
Because I haven't met her yet.
And because you hate kids.
Oh, I do not, I like kids.
Especially, when they are
well‐behaved and bright.
Like I was.
Bright you were not!
Eatin' sand.
Once. When will you let that go?
‐ I was an angel.
‐ For Halloween.
Anyway, I'm sure that I
will meet little Camille soon
and she'll fall in love with me
I'll score big
points with Patrick
and then I'll have him
right where I want him.
Tranquillized, delirious
and walkin' down that aisle.
Guess we're not goin'
to the zoo today, huh?
No, Kevon, that's
what the books are for
to prepare you for the zoo.
I want you to learn
all about the animals.
They're furry and they have
teeth. I just wanna feed them.
Come on. When we get upstairs,
we'll start with the marsupials.
Yeah.
‐ Uncle Ovie. ‐ Hey, man.
Come on, saw it up.
Hit the rock, take it down.
So what's this?
The handyman's handshake.
Yeah, maybe later I'll teach
you how to organize a tool belt.
‐ Cool. ‐ There you go.
Uh, Kevon, what do
you say we go upstairs
and check out my
record collection?
But all we ever
do is look at 'em.
Well, that's because
they're collectors items.
Uncle Ovie lets me play them.
No, he doesn't.
Are you gonna move your feet?
Oh, I see, so I'm the
only one around here
who can clean up, huh?
Can't you lift a finger?
Do I get to pick the finger?
Alright, alright,
that's Patrick.
Oh, Max, go away!
We're expectin' company.
And you got it.
She means Patrick
and his daughter.
I know.
I'm here to watch Regine
make a fool out of herself
with that little girl.
I'm not goin' to make
a fool out of myself.
I have got everythin' I need
to win over the
dear little girl's heart.
Cold, hard cash.
You can't buy a
child's affection.
Where've you been?
Well, kids are built
with BS detectors.
And she's gonna go off like a
car alarm when she meets you.
‐ Whoo! Whoo! ‐ Oh, shut up.
Shut up.
And what makes
you such an expert?
'Cause I dated a guy with
children and it wasn't easy.
And when the
relationship didn't work out
I didn't want him to think it
was because of those kids.
‐ Why did you break up?
‐ Because of those kids.
Some badass kids.
Yes. Well, I am not
goin' to have that problem.
As soon as I'm close
enough to Patrick
the kid is off to
boardin' school.
Okay. Alright, nobody move.
Hi.
Camille, this is the very
nice lady I told you about.
‐ And her name is
Regine. ‐ These are for you.
Oh. Well, thank you.
Why don't you call
me Aunty Regine?
Daddy, she's pretty.
Oh. Call me mommy.
Shoot! My battery's low.
Synclaire, you mind
givin' me the power cord?
No problemo.
Where're you goin'?
To the office where
I left the power cord
I was kinda hopin'
you wouldn't notice.
And that's the difference
between extensions and a weave.
I wanna stay with Regine, daddy.
Aw. Kids love me.
I guess we'll see you tomorrow.
‐ Okay. ‐ Bye, Regine.
Bye, Camille.
Ah. Children.
Okay, you can drop the
act now, they're gone.
What act? That is the most
adorable girl in the world.
She reminds me of
myself when I was a child.
Y'all had sand for lunch?
Let it go!
Oh, Regine, you know Khadijah
she doesn't like to
appear sentimental
but inside, she
sees the niceness.
Regine, you know Synclaire
she don't know what
the hell she talkin' about.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
So what are you doin'?
Child proofin' the apartment.
Camille is spendin' the
day with me tomorrow.
Patrick has to go to
Jersey on business.
Oh, Khadijah. Oh, please,
oh, please, oh, please
can I miss work tomorrow,
so I can spend the day
with Camille too?
Please, please!
No.
What if I beg?
Hey, you know what?
Camille told Patrick that
she wants to be just like me
when she grows up.
Loud and busty?
Forget you, alright? Forget you.
See, you are way out of
touch with reality as usual.
I am goin' to make
the perfect mother.
‐ For what? ‐ For Camille.
See, this way I can have
all the joys of motherhood
without the labor pains,
and‐and dirty diapers
and stretch marks. Ugh.
Little too late for the
stretch marks part.
Well, can you fix it?
Phew.
This news is never easy to give.
I can go in, but there's a risk.
You see, as much as we
know about refrigerators
there's still so much
that we just don't know.
Just fix it.
‐ Is my apprentice ready?
‐ Ready, Uncle Ovie!
'Alright. Let's do this.'
Hey. Alright, Kevon,
come on, man.
It's about time
for us to get goin'.
But we're fixin'
the refrigerator.
Yes, but I have tickets
to the museum, eh.
Alright. Let's go.
Hey, hey, look who's
here, everybody?
‐ How come she
gets to stay? ‐ Shh.
She doesn't know
about the museum.
We don't want it
to get too crowded.
So, what'd you
want for breakfast?
‐ Brownies. ‐ Ooh.
Alright then, brownies it is.
That's one way to get
her bouncin' off the walls.
‐ Can I have brownies too? ‐ No.
I gotta work with you all day.
Regine, how does
the microwave work?
It heats things up very fast.
How does it heat
things up very fast?
There's, um, a little special
somethin' up in there.
Excuse me for buttin' in
but the wrong information
can get a child's
impressionable mind
off in the wrong direction.
See, and as adults
it's our responsibility
to always tell the truth.
You just can't make
up a convenient answer
just so the child will
stop askin' questions.
So how does the
microwave work, Overton?
Hell, I don't know.
But that's the truth.
Flavor Magazine.
Just a moment, I'll connect you
to the subscription department.
Subscriptions. How
may I assist you?
Well, I didn't know they made
bougie in such small sizes.
We went shopping.
We bought pajamas
for our sleepover.
Sleepover?
Darling Camille, why don't you
go see what Synclaire is doin'?
Come on, I'm gonna show
you how the computer works.
Why is little Thumbelina
sleepin' at our house?
Patrick called,
right, with some story
about havin' to stay
overnight on business. Ha!
Khadijah, this is
it. This is the test.
What test?
To see if I can
handle motherhood.
And I will not fail.
And then you press F2 for save.
Thanks. I better
write that down.
Camille, honey, let's go.
Okay, let me know if you
have any more questions.
Smooches.
Now, that's scary.
Now, this little piggy
needs a second coat.
Ah.
You look funny.
Yeah, well, you try
walkin' with these things on.
‐ Hey. ‐ Hey.
I thought you were
with Kevon today.
No. They sent me a lemon.
The kid's with Uncle Ovie again.
No, no, it's not
him, Regine, it's me.
I‐I just can't seem to
communicate with him.
Ah, well, Kyle..
Bein' a parent isn't easy.
I mean, you've got to
walk a delicate balance
between what
makes the child happy
and that which will
nurture and bring forth
a well‐rounded human being.
What am I gonna do? I just..
Have you tried shoppin'?
‐ No. ‐ Tsk.
Well, then, how
can you possibly say
you've spent quality
time with him?
You know, maybe things
have been too structured.
I mean, after all
he's just a kid, right?
Yeah, he just wants to have fun.
Ah.
Well, that's not what I meant
but if that's what
you got out of it, hey.
Ah.
Well, hello.
Oh, just the little
man I wanted to see.
Come here, buddy. You know what?
From now on, we're
just gonna have fun.
And we're not even
gonna read about it first.
Cool! ‐ Oh.
. Alright.
‐ Kyle? ‐ Uh‐huh.
I have a question.
Well, I will be happy to answer
any question you may have
because I am the answer man.
Where do babies come from?
You know, we really need
to go shopping, come on.
Who's got my golden arm?
Who's got my golden arm?
That's very nice, Camille.
What's the rest of the story?
‐ That's all I know.
‐ It's still scary.
It scared Max
right to sleep. Max!
Yeah.. Oh, what?
Oh, ghost story over?
Ooh, scary, that
was fun. Goodnight.
Max, we're all going
to stay here tonight
and sleep on the
floor in sleeping bags.
Yeah, right.
Uh, wait a minute.
Max, the whole
point of this sleepover
was to give Camille
some female influence.
Alright, okay. Well, I'm, uh..
Camille?
‐ What do you think
about boys? ‐ Yuck!
Hold on to that thought, my
work here is done. Goodnight.
Alright, well, Max
is a party pooper
but the rest of
us are still here.
Goodnight.
Synclaire.
I'm sorry, but that ghost
story really got to me.
I can't sleep this
close to the front door.
Who's got my golden arm?
Thanks, Camille.
I had fun today.
Well, I'm glad
you had fun today.
Make sure you mention
that to your daddy.
Okay, time for bed.
Ah. Sleep tight, sweetie.
Goodnight.
‐ Regine? ‐ What?
I have a tummy ache.
What?
My tummy hurts.
Well, what do you usually
do when your tummy hurts?
My daddy gives
me the pink stuff.
Pink stuff? Um..
Uh, uh, Khadijah. Hey,
we got any pink stuff?
‐ 'What?' ‐ Pink
stuff, pink stuff.
What's goin' on?
Her‐her stomach hurts.
No fever. Well, what did
you have to eat today?
Salad, rice, chicken and cake.
‐ How much cake?
‐ Just one cake.
‐ So, w‐w‐what are
we gonna do? ‐ We?
You're gonna sit up
here and nurse this child
I'm goin' to bed.
Wait, Khadijah, what
am I supposed to do?
Figure it out, mom.
Um, okay, alright, honey,
come here. Come here.
Oh. Okay, yes.
Oh, um, alright, I'll, uh
I'll‐I'll give you
some warm ginger ale
and, uh, I‐I'll rub your tummy
and‐and you'll feel all better.
‐ Okay? ‐ Okay.
‐ Okay. ‐ Regine?
‐ Yes, baby. ‐ I'm
gonna throw up.
And then I dreamt
that I was being chased
around the apartment
and he was yelling "You
stole my golden arm!"
Next thing I knew I woke
up in geometry class naked.
Now, I'm gonna have nightmares.
Oh, look. Like two angels.
Droolin' on my sofa.
Hm. That's probably
your daddy, honey.
Don't you wanna run
upstairs and beautify?
No, let him in.
‐ Hey, Patrick. ‐ Hey.
‐ Hi, daddy! ‐ Hey, baby. Wow!
‐ Hi. ‐ Hey.
How was your business trip?
Mm. It went well, but I
missed my two favorite girls.
So how'd everything go here?
I had a tummy ache last night
and Regine took good care of me.
Well, I knew she would.
I'm gonna get me some breakfast.
‐ Can I have brownies?
‐ Yeah! Brownies!
Hey, hey, hey!
So..
Did you have a good time?
Uh, Camille is the
sweetest, cutest kid.
God has ever made.
She wore you out, huh?
No! Yeah.
And to tell you the truth..
I'm not ready to be a mother.
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
Slow down, Regine.
I'm not lookin' for a wife.
I mean, my bank account's
just gettin' over my last one.
Yeah, but don't you
need a mother for Camille?
What Camille needs
is a good parent
and, for the record, there's
a very nice female judge
in family court who seems to
think that I can raise Camille
just fine by myself.
So then this is it, huh?
You really like to jump
to conclusions, don't you?
Well, yeah, I‐I guess I do.
Regine.
Don't you know that
Camille is crazy about ya?
Well, I'm crazy
about Camille too.
So then maybe the three of us
can continue to see each other.
Saturday. Prospect Park?
‐ We'll have a picnic. ‐ Hm.
I'll bring a cake. You
bring the pink stuff.
I can't get around
these child proof plugs.
Regine, you got
your money's worth.
Yeah, and I'm savin'
those, I'm gonna need 'em.
I thought you said you
weren't ready to be a mom?
Well, I'm not, but
when the time is right
honey, I'm havin' me a
whole bunch of babies.
My genes are too good to waste.
But how do you know
when the time is right?
Get yourself together first.
I'm gonna build up
Flavor, buy radio stations
television networks
I'm gonna have a whole
communications empire
that will run itself!
Giving me the time
to raise a family.
Figure I'd be about twenty‐nine.
Well, I'm ready to
have a baby right now.
Except for the fact
that I'm not married
a‐and I'm still in school
and I only have a part‐time job.
Ah, maybe I'll
just buy a cactus.
Well, I know I want children.
But I probably won't be ready
until my feet are into stirrups
and the doctor is sayin' "I
can see the head, push."
Max, as into your
career as you are
you will probably
never have children.
Yes, well, you underestimate
me, my little friend.
Because whatever
I do, I do well.
And if my career
and my child conflict
I will quit.
You'd give up law?
No, I'd give the
kid to Khadijah.
We're having fun
now, huh, Kevon?
But you still haven't
answered my question.
Where do babies come from?
Uh, here's the problem
right here, this wire is loose.
Do you know, Uncle Ovie?
Ooh, keen eyesight, Kyle.
Yeah, that's the
wire right there.
Isn't anybody gonna tell
me where babies come from?
No doubt about it.
This compressor is
definitely in rough shape.
You guys don't know, do you?
I had to fix this week.
Oh, you could probably
fix it blindfolded.
Nah, I tried that
on the second one
all I got was a nasty shock.
Khadijah, is this
anything we should keep?
Does it smell like we can
get another week out of it?
Well, let's see.
Borderline pile or bad pile.
Hey! Max in the
house! What's up?
‐ What y'all got to
eat? ‐ Oh, try this.
Oh!
‐ Bad pile! Bad
pile! ‐ 'Bad pile.'
♪ Check check check it out
check check check it out ♪
♪ Do what you want
no free position ♪
♪ We are living ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ Single ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Yes we're living
the single life yeah ♪
♪ We are living ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Single ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ And in a '90s kind of world ♪
♪ I'm glad I got my girls ♪
♪ Keep your head up ♪
♪ What? ♪
♪ Keep your head up ♪
♪ That's right ♪
♪ Whenever this life get tough ♪
♪ You gotta fight ♪
♪ With my homegirls standing
to my left and my right ♪
♪ True blue ♪
♪ It's tight like glue ♪
♪ We are living ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Single ♪
♪ And in a '90s kind of world ♪
♪ I'm glad I got my girls ♪
♪ Haa ♪
‐ What's a five letter
word? ‐ For what?
Doesn't matter? I don't
read the clues. Pfft.
Morning.
Hm, sleepin' past noon
must have been
a pretty good date.
It couldn't have been that good
or she won't be wakin' up here.
You know, Maxine
sleepin' on strange sheets
may be your idea of a good time
but mine is a little
more romantic.
Readin' each other poetry
listenin' to chamber music
sharin' a laugh over
a glass of pinot noir.
‐ Since when? ‐ Since Patrick.
Girl, you've been goin' through
a lot of changes for that man.
Cookin' his favorite
food, goin' to art exhibits.
Coverin' up your breast.
Ooh. Sounds serious.
Well, it is.
I mean, Patrick
is not just any man
he's that rare combination
of fun, sophistication
and financial security.
Your three basic man groups.
Well, I hope this isn't
too technical for you ladies
but I'm gonna have to
replace the refrigerator coil.
Ah. Is the Freon level
below factory specs.
You've been bonin'
up again, huh?
Well, as you may well
know those little devils
can be very tricky to fix.
Sorry you gotta work
on Sunday, Overton
but I'm not gettin'
behind that fridge.
Well, it ain't like I
got nothin' else to do.
Oh, where's Kyle?
Oh, he's with his kid from
the Big Brother Program.
He's gonna teach
him how to be a man.
Yes, well, I hope
Kyle's takin' notes.
‐ Hi, I'm Patrick.
Is Regine in? ‐ Hi.
'Uh, yeah, she's..'
Hi, Patrick, I'm Khadijah,
nice to finally meet you.
And this is Overton.
He was just leavin' to
go get a refrigerator coil.
Careful. Those
things can be tricky.
I like him.
Well, come on in.
Oh.
Patrick.
You devil, droppin'
by unannounced.
Oh, and me lookin' such a mess.
You should have seen
her 10 seconds ago.
‐ Well, I think you
look great. ‐ Oh.
These‐these are for you.
I was gonna have 'em delivered
but I wanted to see the
look when you got 'em.
‐ Oh. ‐ Do you
have any brothers?
Alright, ignore my
desperate roommates.
Uh, can I get you some coffee?
No, s‐sorry, I can't stay, I
have to pick up my daughter
from dance class.
Well, um..
It's‐it's nice to meet you all.
‐ I'll call you later.
Okay? ‐ Okay.
Got a cousin?
Young uncle?
Ooh, Regine, why didn't
you tell us he had a daughter?
Because I haven't met her yet.
And because you hate kids.
Oh, I do not, I like kids.
Especially, when they are
well‐behaved and bright.
Like I was.
Bright you were not!
Eatin' sand.
Once. When will you let that go?
‐ I was an angel.
‐ For Halloween.
Anyway, I'm sure that I
will meet little Camille soon
and she'll fall in love with me
I'll score big
points with Patrick
and then I'll have him
right where I want him.
Tranquillized, delirious
and walkin' down that aisle.
Guess we're not goin'
to the zoo today, huh?
No, Kevon, that's
what the books are for
to prepare you for the zoo.
I want you to learn
all about the animals.
They're furry and they have
teeth. I just wanna feed them.
Come on. When we get upstairs,
we'll start with the marsupials.
Yeah.
‐ Uncle Ovie. ‐ Hey, man.
Come on, saw it up.
Hit the rock, take it down.
So what's this?
The handyman's handshake.
Yeah, maybe later I'll teach
you how to organize a tool belt.
‐ Cool. ‐ There you go.
Uh, Kevon, what do
you say we go upstairs
and check out my
record collection?
But all we ever
do is look at 'em.
Well, that's because
they're collectors items.
Uncle Ovie lets me play them.
No, he doesn't.
Are you gonna move your feet?
Oh, I see, so I'm the
only one around here
who can clean up, huh?
Can't you lift a finger?
Do I get to pick the finger?
Alright, alright,
that's Patrick.
Oh, Max, go away!
We're expectin' company.
And you got it.
She means Patrick
and his daughter.
I know.
I'm here to watch Regine
make a fool out of herself
with that little girl.
I'm not goin' to make
a fool out of myself.
I have got everythin' I need
to win over the
dear little girl's heart.
Cold, hard cash.
You can't buy a
child's affection.
Where've you been?
Well, kids are built
with BS detectors.
And she's gonna go off like a
car alarm when she meets you.
‐ Whoo! Whoo! ‐ Oh, shut up.
Shut up.
And what makes
you such an expert?
'Cause I dated a guy with
children and it wasn't easy.
And when the
relationship didn't work out
I didn't want him to think it
was because of those kids.
‐ Why did you break up?
‐ Because of those kids.
Some badass kids.
Yes. Well, I am not
goin' to have that problem.
As soon as I'm close
enough to Patrick
the kid is off to
boardin' school.
Okay. Alright, nobody move.
Hi.
Camille, this is the very
nice lady I told you about.
‐ And her name is
Regine. ‐ These are for you.
Oh. Well, thank you.
Why don't you call
me Aunty Regine?
Daddy, she's pretty.
Oh. Call me mommy.
Shoot! My battery's low.
Synclaire, you mind
givin' me the power cord?
No problemo.
Where're you goin'?
To the office where
I left the power cord
I was kinda hopin'
you wouldn't notice.
And that's the difference
between extensions and a weave.
I wanna stay with Regine, daddy.
Aw. Kids love me.
I guess we'll see you tomorrow.
‐ Okay. ‐ Bye, Regine.
Bye, Camille.
Ah. Children.
Okay, you can drop the
act now, they're gone.
What act? That is the most
adorable girl in the world.
She reminds me of
myself when I was a child.
Y'all had sand for lunch?
Let it go!
Oh, Regine, you know Khadijah
she doesn't like to
appear sentimental
but inside, she
sees the niceness.
Regine, you know Synclaire
she don't know what
the hell she talkin' about.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
So what are you doin'?
Child proofin' the apartment.
Camille is spendin' the
day with me tomorrow.
Patrick has to go to
Jersey on business.
Oh, Khadijah. Oh, please,
oh, please, oh, please
can I miss work tomorrow,
so I can spend the day
with Camille too?
Please, please!
No.
What if I beg?
Hey, you know what?
Camille told Patrick that
she wants to be just like me
when she grows up.
Loud and busty?
Forget you, alright? Forget you.
See, you are way out of
touch with reality as usual.
I am goin' to make
the perfect mother.
‐ For what? ‐ For Camille.
See, this way I can have
all the joys of motherhood
without the labor pains,
and‐and dirty diapers
and stretch marks. Ugh.
Little too late for the
stretch marks part.
Well, can you fix it?
Phew.
This news is never easy to give.
I can go in, but there's a risk.
You see, as much as we
know about refrigerators
there's still so much
that we just don't know.
Just fix it.
‐ Is my apprentice ready?
‐ Ready, Uncle Ovie!
'Alright. Let's do this.'
Hey. Alright, Kevon,
come on, man.
It's about time
for us to get goin'.
But we're fixin'
the refrigerator.
Yes, but I have tickets
to the museum, eh.
Alright. Let's go.
Hey, hey, look who's
here, everybody?
‐ How come she
gets to stay? ‐ Shh.
She doesn't know
about the museum.
We don't want it
to get too crowded.
So, what'd you
want for breakfast?
‐ Brownies. ‐ Ooh.
Alright then, brownies it is.
That's one way to get
her bouncin' off the walls.
‐ Can I have brownies too? ‐ No.
I gotta work with you all day.
Regine, how does
the microwave work?
It heats things up very fast.
How does it heat
things up very fast?
There's, um, a little special
somethin' up in there.
Excuse me for buttin' in
but the wrong information
can get a child's
impressionable mind
off in the wrong direction.
See, and as adults
it's our responsibility
to always tell the truth.
You just can't make
up a convenient answer
just so the child will
stop askin' questions.
So how does the
microwave work, Overton?
Hell, I don't know.
But that's the truth.
Flavor Magazine.
Just a moment, I'll connect you
to the subscription department.
Subscriptions. How
may I assist you?
Well, I didn't know they made
bougie in such small sizes.
We went shopping.
We bought pajamas
for our sleepover.
Sleepover?
Darling Camille, why don't you
go see what Synclaire is doin'?
Come on, I'm gonna show
you how the computer works.
Why is little Thumbelina
sleepin' at our house?
Patrick called,
right, with some story
about havin' to stay
overnight on business. Ha!
Khadijah, this is
it. This is the test.
What test?
To see if I can
handle motherhood.
And I will not fail.
And then you press F2 for save.
Thanks. I better
write that down.
Camille, honey, let's go.
Okay, let me know if you
have any more questions.
Smooches.
Now, that's scary.
Now, this little piggy
needs a second coat.
Ah.
You look funny.
Yeah, well, you try
walkin' with these things on.
‐ Hey. ‐ Hey.
I thought you were
with Kevon today.
No. They sent me a lemon.
The kid's with Uncle Ovie again.
No, no, it's not
him, Regine, it's me.
I‐I just can't seem to
communicate with him.
Ah, well, Kyle..
Bein' a parent isn't easy.
I mean, you've got to
walk a delicate balance
between what
makes the child happy
and that which will
nurture and bring forth
a well‐rounded human being.
What am I gonna do? I just..
Have you tried shoppin'?
‐ No. ‐ Tsk.
Well, then, how
can you possibly say
you've spent quality
time with him?
You know, maybe things
have been too structured.
I mean, after all
he's just a kid, right?
Yeah, he just wants to have fun.
Ah.
Well, that's not what I meant
but if that's what
you got out of it, hey.
Ah.
Well, hello.
Oh, just the little
man I wanted to see.
Come here, buddy. You know what?
From now on, we're
just gonna have fun.
And we're not even
gonna read about it first.
Cool! ‐ Oh.
. Alright.
‐ Kyle? ‐ Uh‐huh.
I have a question.
Well, I will be happy to answer
any question you may have
because I am the answer man.
Where do babies come from?
You know, we really need
to go shopping, come on.
Who's got my golden arm?
Who's got my golden arm?
That's very nice, Camille.
What's the rest of the story?
‐ That's all I know.
‐ It's still scary.
It scared Max
right to sleep. Max!
Yeah.. Oh, what?
Oh, ghost story over?
Ooh, scary, that
was fun. Goodnight.
Max, we're all going
to stay here tonight
and sleep on the
floor in sleeping bags.
Yeah, right.
Uh, wait a minute.
Max, the whole
point of this sleepover
was to give Camille
some female influence.
Alright, okay. Well, I'm, uh..
Camille?
‐ What do you think
about boys? ‐ Yuck!
Hold on to that thought, my
work here is done. Goodnight.
Alright, well, Max
is a party pooper
but the rest of
us are still here.
Goodnight.
Synclaire.
I'm sorry, but that ghost
story really got to me.
I can't sleep this
close to the front door.
Who's got my golden arm?
Thanks, Camille.
I had fun today.
Well, I'm glad
you had fun today.
Make sure you mention
that to your daddy.
Okay, time for bed.
Ah. Sleep tight, sweetie.
Goodnight.
‐ Regine? ‐ What?
I have a tummy ache.
What?
My tummy hurts.
Well, what do you usually
do when your tummy hurts?
My daddy gives
me the pink stuff.
Pink stuff? Um..
Uh, uh, Khadijah. Hey,
we got any pink stuff?
‐ 'What?' ‐ Pink
stuff, pink stuff.
What's goin' on?
Her‐her stomach hurts.
No fever. Well, what did
you have to eat today?
Salad, rice, chicken and cake.
‐ How much cake?
‐ Just one cake.
‐ So, w‐w‐what are
we gonna do? ‐ We?
You're gonna sit up
here and nurse this child
I'm goin' to bed.
Wait, Khadijah, what
am I supposed to do?
Figure it out, mom.
Um, okay, alright, honey,
come here. Come here.
Oh. Okay, yes.
Oh, um, alright, I'll, uh
I'll‐I'll give you
some warm ginger ale
and, uh, I‐I'll rub your tummy
and‐and you'll feel all better.
‐ Okay? ‐ Okay.
‐ Okay. ‐ Regine?
‐ Yes, baby. ‐ I'm
gonna throw up.
And then I dreamt
that I was being chased
around the apartment
and he was yelling "You
stole my golden arm!"
Next thing I knew I woke
up in geometry class naked.
Now, I'm gonna have nightmares.
Oh, look. Like two angels.
Droolin' on my sofa.
Hm. That's probably
your daddy, honey.
Don't you wanna run
upstairs and beautify?
No, let him in.
‐ Hey, Patrick. ‐ Hey.
‐ Hi, daddy! ‐ Hey, baby. Wow!
‐ Hi. ‐ Hey.
How was your business trip?
Mm. It went well, but I
missed my two favorite girls.
So how'd everything go here?
I had a tummy ache last night
and Regine took good care of me.
Well, I knew she would.
I'm gonna get me some breakfast.
‐ Can I have brownies?
‐ Yeah! Brownies!
Hey, hey, hey!
So..
Did you have a good time?
Uh, Camille is the
sweetest, cutest kid.
God has ever made.
She wore you out, huh?
No! Yeah.
And to tell you the truth..
I'm not ready to be a mother.
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
Slow down, Regine.
I'm not lookin' for a wife.
I mean, my bank account's
just gettin' over my last one.
Yeah, but don't you
need a mother for Camille?
What Camille needs
is a good parent
and, for the record, there's
a very nice female judge
in family court who seems to
think that I can raise Camille
just fine by myself.
So then this is it, huh?
You really like to jump
to conclusions, don't you?
Well, yeah, I‐I guess I do.
Regine.
Don't you know that
Camille is crazy about ya?
Well, I'm crazy
about Camille too.
So then maybe the three of us
can continue to see each other.
Saturday. Prospect Park?
‐ We'll have a picnic. ‐ Hm.
I'll bring a cake. You
bring the pink stuff.
I can't get around
these child proof plugs.
Regine, you got
your money's worth.
Yeah, and I'm savin'
those, I'm gonna need 'em.
I thought you said you
weren't ready to be a mom?
Well, I'm not, but
when the time is right
honey, I'm havin' me a
whole bunch of babies.
My genes are too good to waste.
But how do you know
when the time is right?
Get yourself together first.
I'm gonna build up
Flavor, buy radio stations
television networks
I'm gonna have a whole
communications empire
that will run itself!
Giving me the time
to raise a family.
Figure I'd be about twenty‐nine.
Well, I'm ready to
have a baby right now.
Except for the fact
that I'm not married
a‐and I'm still in school
and I only have a part‐time job.
Ah, maybe I'll
just buy a cactus.
Well, I know I want children.
But I probably won't be ready
until my feet are into stirrups
and the doctor is sayin' "I
can see the head, push."
Max, as into your
career as you are
you will probably
never have children.
Yes, well, you underestimate
me, my little friend.
Because whatever
I do, I do well.
And if my career
and my child conflict
I will quit.
You'd give up law?
No, I'd give the
kid to Khadijah.
We're having fun
now, huh, Kevon?
But you still haven't
answered my question.
Where do babies come from?
Uh, here's the problem
right here, this wire is loose.
Do you know, Uncle Ovie?
Ooh, keen eyesight, Kyle.
Yeah, that's the
wire right there.
Isn't anybody gonna tell
me where babies come from?
No doubt about it.
This compressor is
definitely in rough shape.
You guys don't know, do you?