Little House on the Prairie (1974–1983): Season 5, Episode 15 - The Craftsman - full transcript

Mr. Brower:
Get out of my way!

Get! Scat!

You little varmints,
get out, hmmph!

Ooh... I'll show you!

Mr. Brower:
You little scamps!

I'll teach you a lesson
you'll never forget!

You... I'll get you!

Ooh!

Mr. Brower: I'm going to thrash
you within an inch of your life,

you little
scamp, you!

Calm down,
Mr. Brower.



Calm down.

What are you getting
so excited about?

You see what he done?

The little varmint
made me break my cane!

So? A new cane
you can always get,

but the little boy,
you're frightening him.

He deserves it!

He's got no respect.

Come on, Mr. Brower.

When you were a boy,

you never made mischief?

Please, let him go.
Even the holy book say,

"if you must beat a
child, use a string."

All right,
this time.



Aah!

Hooligan, bum,
come back here!

You were 100% right!

You bet I was.

If you catch
that bum again,

give him a good
crack for me!

Here come the hebes.

Hold your nose and
hang on to your wallet.

Harriet: Hold your nose
and hang on to your wallet!

What's the matter, nels?
Didn't you think that was funny?

All I know is
that old Isaac

does the best woodwork
in hero township.

There's nobody
that can touch him.

Well, however,
Mr. Larrabee,

the only reason that
we let the old Jew

into the store
in the first place

is because he does
make very good coffins,

and we do stock coffins.

But god forbid that you
should ever need one.

Lem,

Zeke, let's take
a little walk.

Larrabee: We'll be
back, Mrs. Oleson,

as soon as
the air clears.

May all his teeth
fall out except one,

and in that one he
should get a toothache.

Ha!

Good news, papa?

Remember sweet
cousin Rachel?

The only one
with a moustache.

I remember.

She get married...

To American
student, no less.

That's good
news, papa.

But what
about a girl?

Oy!

What's wrong, papa?

Did someone die?

No one died.

My brother Ezra
and his wife

have found a girl
for you to marry.

Really?

What does it
say about her?

What does she look like?

It says she's an
attractive girl

from a good family.

Her grandfather was
a famous scholar.

Does she have
a good figure?

Am I her tailor?

How do I know whether
she has a good figure?

Here, read it
for yourself.

They want me to go back
there as soon as I can.

Why? Is she so old she
can't wait a while?

Please, papa, don't
be angry with me.

I have to go.

There isn't a Jewish
girl for 500 miles.

Angry? Who is angry?

Go.

I'm not stopping you.

Aaron: Well, you're certainly
not making it any easier on me.

You think it's going
to be easy for me?

Then come with me.

No one's forcing you to
stay here by yourself.

You know I can't.

Mama is buried here,

and I will
not leave her.

Papa, I've decided
not to go to New York.

I want to
stay with you.

Impossible,
you must go.

But I don't want
to leave you.

And I don't
want you to go,

but you got to
think of yourself.

When I die, I...
I have you to pray for me.

But if you don't marry
and have children,

who will intercede
for you in heaven?

I don't care.

Yes, you do.

Besides, it is
written in the zohar,

"a man is not a man until
he is united with a woman."

Papa...

Did you
finish packing?

No... not yet.

Well, finish.

You'll leave first
thing in the morning.

You'll be all
packed already.

I stay here with
mama a while.

You go on.

And don't forget
your socks.

Go with god, my son.

Mr. Singerman?

Come in.

I'm Charles
Ingalls' son.

He sent me over with
this money for you,

for the chair
you made.

Well, thank
you very much.

I guess you're
kind of busy.

I best be
going, see ya.

Wait, young man.
Don't go so fast.

I don't even
know your name.

It's Albert.

Albert,

I was about to
have some tea.

Can I offer you something?

An apple maybe?

Sure.

What kind of
wood is this?

Oak.

It's a beauty.

What kind of knife do
you use to carve her?

No knives, chisels.

Many different kinds.

Here.

This is a wood
carver's chisel.

Boy, I sure could've used
that when I was carving.

You work with wood?

Not really, I
just whittle some.

Can I see what you made?

Well, you
might laugh.

Why? Does it
tell jokes?

Mr. Singerman: Albert,
never be ashamed of any work you've done.

Only of what you
haven't done.

Let me see.

Here.

Say...

This is very nice!

You like it?

Certainly, I like
it, but what is it?

It's a whistle,
you blow on it.

Tell me, Albert...

You have an interest
in woodwork?

I like to learn
how to make stuff.

You know, I, uh...

I was thinking about
hiring a new apprentice.

Would you be interested
in working with me?

Oh, you
bet I would!

But I'd have to ask
my pa's permission.

Ask him!

Now... let's eat.

Charles: Hey, Albert.

Hi, pa, can I talk
to you for a minute?

Sure.

Well, Mr. Singerman asked
me to be his apprentice,

and I'd like your permission
to work with him after school

instead of
doing chores.

Are you sure you know
what you're getting into?

Being an apprentice to a craftsman,
that's pretty serious business.

I know,
but I still want to do it.

How come this sudden
interest in woodwork?

I thought you were pretty
set on being a farmer.

Well, I am,
I just...

Just thought it wouldn't be
bad to learn another trade.

That's
good thinking.

You couldn't learn
from a better man.

Yeah, I know.

And, well, with his son
going back east and all,

I kind of
thought that...

You kind of thought
he might be yearning

for some company
for a while.

Yeah.

There's just something about
him, pa.

All right,
you can do it,

but I don't want your
homework suffering.

Oh, it won't,
thanks, pa!

Okay.

Morning,
Mr. Brower.

Mr. Brower:
Good morning.

How's everything
by you, Mr. Brower?

Fine, still
breathing, you?

Just fine.

Heard that kid of your'n
ran off to New York City.

Ah, he didn't
exactly run off.

He went to
get married.

I know that story, raised
5 young'uns myself.

And not one of them
ever comes to see me.

In our village,
there is a saying.

One father can
support 10 children.

10 children...

Can support one father.

Amen to that, brother.

Mr. Brower,

I notice you have
an extra bucket...

And I need one
very badly.

Would be willing to
trade for this cane?

Workmanship ain't bad.

You say you want to
make an even swap?

That's right.

Mr. Brower: Guess
it'll be all right.

Ok, it's a deal.

Mr. Singerman: Thank you,
Mr. brower, and be well.

Mr. Brower:
The same to you.

Albert: I don't get it.

How come you traded him
that great walking stick

for this piece of junk?

Mr. Singerman:
Heh heh, Albert,

there's a Jewish
word, rachmones.

It means in English
"compassion."

Life without rachmones
is not worth living.

He's a poor man.

He needs a new
walking stick.

Albert: Then why didn't
you just give it to him?

Why trade it for
a rusty old bucket?

Mr. Singerman: Because our faith
says when you give charity,

you must give so the person
receiving the charity

feels no shame.

I want a word
with you, Ingalls.

What can I do
for you, larrabee?

Nothing,
I thought you might like to know

your boy's hanging
around with that old Jew.

He has my permission.

If you'll excuse me,
I've got work to do.

I don't know what you're
trying to prove, Ingalls.

Ain't no decent family wants
their kids mixing with hebes!

Whole Ingalls family's
gone Jew-crazy.

Ain't nothing wrong with
being prejudiced against Jews.

It... it... it's
self-defense.

I kind of agree with you,
larrabee, I'm prejudiced myself.

You are, against who?

Against short,
red-necked farmers.

Zeke: Hey, how's the little
Jew lover doing today?

Going to see your cheap old
Jew friend this afternoon?

Why don't you
two just shut up?

Hey, why don't you try making
us, Jew boy?

Yeah, well,
maybe I will.

Why do you keep calling Albert a Jew boy?
We're not Jewish.

You're not, but
Albert could be.

His parents
could've been Jews.

Maybe that's why he's
so attracted to them.

Albert's not Jewish!

How do you know?

Maybe I am.

They sure don't seem a whole lot
worse than anybody else here.

Eh, Albert ain't no Jew.

Everyone knows that Jews have horns
on their head, like the devil.

Albert...

Does Mr. Singerman
have horns on his head?

I don't know,
he never takes off his hat.

Sure is hot today,
isn't it, Mr. Singerman?

Yeah.

Why don't you make yourself
comfortable and take that hat off?

No, I'm all
right, I'm fine.

Boy, that sure is a nice hat you got
there, Mr. Singerman.

What do you call
it? A derby?

I don't know.

Well, why don't you take it
off and look at the label?

There is no label.

Mr. Singerman?

Yes?

Have you got horns
under that hat?

What?

Horns, some
people told me

Jewish people have
horns on their head.

Ha ha ha!

Well, do you?

We have no horns.

We cover our heads
to remind us

that man is
no big shot.

There is something
above him.

Horns!

Whew!

A mishegoss!

Albert: And I was scared at first
when he wouldn't take off his hat.

I was just sure
he had horns.

Just like the
devil, huh?

Mr. Singerman laughed,
too, when I told him.

I don't see why
you have to spend

so much time
with that old man.

Well, I like
him, that's why.

Well, you seem to be
the only one that does.

Nobody likes Jews.

Charles: Half-pint, what
kind of talk is that?

Well, it's true.

And I get made fun of, too,
just because I'm his sister.

So then, rather than
being made fun of,

you go along with the rest
of them and dislike someone

just because
they're a Jew?

I don't dislike him...

Charles: Half-pint,
if you don't speak up to people, bigots,

then you're no
better than they are.

Worse, in fact, because
you know that it's wrong,

and you allow them to think that
you feel the same way they do.

Finish your supper.

I'm sorry about what
I said last night.

Yeah, I know.

It's just that you hear
what other kids say, and...

You don't have
to explain.

Thanks.

For what?

For not hating me.

Oh, hate is for people
like the larrabees.

I got better
things to do.

Me too.

Hey, there's Nellie.
Come on, I want to tell her something.

Laura: Nellie!

Nellie, Willie!
I want to tell you something.

Nellie: What
do you want?

Well, I just wanted to
tell you Willie was right.

I was? About what?

Mr. Singerman, he
does have horns.

He does?

Yep, only they're
not little ones.

They're great,
big ones.

How does he get
his hat over them?

Albert: Well, that's
the scary part.

He didn't hear me come into
the workshop the other day,

and he had his hat off.

And I couldn't believe it,
he was polishing his horns.

They... they must
have been that big.

You're fooling!

Albert: Nope.

And when he went to
put his hat back on,

they shrank down
to little points.

I wish I
could've seen.

Albert: Well, you can.

Come out to Mr. Singerman's
place after school.

I'm too scared.

Me too.

Albert: Well,
I'll be with you.

Laura, are you going?

Albert: No,
she's not going.

She's too much
of a fraidy-cat.

But I know you're
not, Nellie.

All right, I'll go.

Come along, Willie.

What was that
all about?

Will you
help me?

With what?

Something to scare
the pants off Nellie.

Oh, you
bet I will!

You sure he
won't see us?

No, his eyes
aren't too good.

Besides, we
can run fast.

All right,
let's go.

Open up the door.

Open it.

Aah!

We got them!

Sure would've been a lot easier
to make if we used nails.

Never.

Nails are an abomination
to a true craftsman.

Still,
it would've saved a lot of time.

Time means nothing.

Praise means nothing.

Mr. Singerman: Competing
with others means nothing.

What matters...

Is only the task
in front of you,

and you must give
it everything.

Everything.

Mr. Singerman?

Yes?

Why are you crying?

I cry because
my father cried,

and his father cried.

It's part of
making a coffin.

But no one
even died yet.

This one's for
the mercantile.

It does not matter.

Some men don't cry,
because they fear

it's a sign of weakness.

I was taught that
a man is a man

because he can cry.

Albert...

I'll show you
something.

Albert...

A craftsman must strive

not to be a schnorrer.

Schnorrer is someone
who takes and takes

and never gives back.

God provided us with
trees for our livelihood.

So...

We must plant
some in return.

Mr. Singerman,
are you all right?

Yes, yes, I'll
be all right.

I'm fine.

Are you sure?

I'm fine.

All I need is
some rest.

You should be
getting home now.

Maybe I should walk back
to your place with you.

Nonsense.

I'm fine...

Except for the fact that
you're standing on my foot.

Oh, sorry.

Go home now.

I'll see you tomorrow.

Okay.

See you tomorrow.

Hey, Lem, look
who's here!

Well, Lem, this little Jew
boy there is trespassing.

Yeah, well,
we got to teach him a lesson.

Albert, land sakes!
What happened to you?

Nothing much, just
had a little run-in.

Who with?

The larrabee boys.

What, both
of them?

Well, what made you do
a fool thing like that?

My legs, they weren't
fast enough to get away.

Oh, your legs!
Come on, let's get you cleaned up.

Safe!

Aw, hey, you're nuts,
he was out of there!

He's safe.

You missed
me by a mile.

You're lying,
you Jew lover!

Shut up.

Hey, looks like the Jew
boy wants another beating.

Lem: Ok, let's
give it to him.

Hold it,
both of you!

I've already hit
two home runs today.

You want your head
to be the next one?

Oh, why don't you
stay out of it?

Because I'm a Jew
lover, too, that's why.

Now, unless you want me to knock
enough wind out of you to fly a kite,

you'd better
get back.

Come on, Zeke,
leave him be.

It ain't worth getting
your head broke for.

Thanks.

You're welcome.

You were out,
you know?

I know.

Come on.

Your face tells me

that you either have
bad news for me,

or you're suffering
from indigestion.

Which is it?

Your heart's in very
bad shape, Isaac.

So? This I know
for a long time.

But it's
gotten worse.

You've got to stop
exerting yourself.

Quit working.

Quit working!

Better I should
eat a pork chop.

You want me to sit
and rock in a chair?

You'll live longer.

Thank you, doctor.

You should live...

And be well.

How come you lit those
candles, Mr. Singerman?

The flame represents
god's light.

On the sabbath,
we ask god

to come
into our lives

and illuminate the
darkness we live in.

Yeah? Well,
I'm not too sure about god myself.

Ha! Why? You don't
believe in him?

No, I believe
he's up there.

Just I've been kind
of mad at him lately.

Mad at god? Why?

Well... because he
lets bad things happen.

Albert, don't blame the almighty

for all the
evil men do.

God gives us
the freedom

to choose between
good and evil.

Is it his fault
if some people

choose to
follow the evil?

Hmm, I reckon I never
thought of it that way.

Some things are so
hard to understand.

What's it all about,
Mr. Singerman?

What's it all
really mean?

You mean
the world?

Yeah, the sun
and the stars,

people.

It's all got to mean
something, doesn't it?

Yes, yes.

I'm afraid I don't
know the answer

to all those
questions.

I don't guess
anybody does.

People say it's impossible
to know those things.

Impossible?

I don't agree.

If human beings can
ask such questions,

then there must
be answers.

Keep asking.

Keep searching,
Albert.

You'll find
the answers.

Albert: How come we stopped
working on the cabinet?

Isaac: I just received an
urgent order for a new coffin.

Albert:
From the mercantile?

Mr. Singerman: No,
Dr. Baker is going to lose

one of his patients.

That's why we bring cut
lumber from your father.

It will save time.

And, in this case,
time is important.

Albert: Did the doc
say who was dying?

Mr. Singerman: No,
he wouldn't tell me.

He only said it is a
very wonderful person.

And this one
will do it.

Boy, you sure are
particular about your wood.

It's one of the
pleasures of the old.

Squeezing
the produce,

picking out the
largest eggs.

It helps you to establish
in your own mind

that you know more
than the young,

at least about
some things.

I know what
you mean.

How much do
I owe you?

I'll just put
it on your bill.

No, no, no.
I'm closing out my bill.

There's no
reason for that.

I have a reason,
I'm going on a trip.

Hey, well,
congratulations!

It's about time,
Mr. Singerman.

Are you going
to see your son?

Older relatives first.
My son, eventually.

Charles: Yeah, I bet
they'll be surprised.

Yep.

Let's see, all
together, it's $3.02.

Make it $3.00 even.

There.

How's Albert
working out?

He was a godsend.

He's a very special boy.

You should be proud.

I am, sir, thank you.

Good-bye, Mr. Ingalls.

Charles: Good-bye,
have a good trip.

Albert...

Let's go.

See you
tonight, pa!

Charles: Right.

Mr. Singerman!
Mr. Singerman!

Mr. Singerman?

Charles, he'd like
to see you now.

Sit, Mr. Ingalls.

Be comfortable.

I'm very fond of
you, Mr. Ingalls,

so, I'm going to
ask of you a favor.

Just name it,
Mr. Singerman.

On the dresser,

you will
find a letter

and my
prayer shawl.

Please...

Would you send them
to my son in New York?

Of course I will.

Good.

And where's
Albert?

You know...

I love
that boy...

Like he
was my own.

Will you send
him in to me,

Mr. Ingalls?

Albert.

Soon...

I will be in very
good company.

It isn't fair.

It is fair.

A man should not be a
schnorrer with life either.

I've had many good years.

My body is tired.

It's enough.

But you aren't going
to be here anymore.

Albert...

The time I leave behind

has nothing to do with me.

It isn't mine...

Just like the time before
I was born wasn't mine.

You remember I told you...

If human beings keep
asking questions...

Then there
must be answers.

Well...

Now...

I go...

Where I will find

some of those
answers, you know?

Now...

We still have
work to do.

But I want to
stay with you.

No.

A craftsman doesn't leave
a job half-finished.

I'm depending
on you, Albert.

You must finish
our work.

It's for a...

Very nice person,

remember?

Mr. Singerman:
Albert!

No nails.

He's gone.

Albert: I felt real
good planting that tree,

because I knew that
long after I was gone,

it would still be there,

watching over Mr. Singerman.