Leave It to Beaver (1957–1963): Season 6, Episode 6 - Eddie, the Businessman - full transcript

Starring...

and...

Hi, Wally.

Hi, Dad.

Well, did you have any
luck lining up a weekend job?

Not at all.

Boy, Eddie and I must have
gone to at least a dozen places.

Well, what seems
to be the trouble?

Well, mostly they said

they needed somebody
with experience.

But how am I supposed
to get experience



if I can't find a job to
get experience with?

Well, don't get too
discouraged, Wally.

You keep trying, and I'll see

if I can't come up
with some suggestions.

Well, hi, Wally, you're home.

Did you apply at the
department store for a job?

Yeah, that's where
Eddie and I went first.

The only opening they
had was for demonstrators.

Demonstrators?

Well, can't they teach you?

Oh, I... I don't think so, Mom.

It was demonstrating
ladies' hair dryers.

Wait a minute, Wally.

Ward, what about that
man you play golf with?



You know, the one that manages

the Mayfield Dairy
Products place.

Oh, Ted Worden?

That's an idea. He
has a pretty big plant.

Gee, Dad, I'd be
willing to do anything.

Just one thing, Wally...

Does Eddie have
to be in on this?

Well, he... he doesn't have to,

but we've sort of been
looking for jobs together.

And well, gee, Dad,
you don't have to worry.

If you help us get a job,
Eddie will work real hard.

Well, how can you be so sure?

Because if he doesn't,
I'll belt him one.

Hey, Wally, if you do get
a job at Mayfield Dairies,

what do you think
you'll be doing?

Oh, gee, Beav, I don't
know. It's hard to tell.

Mayfield Dairy's
a pretty big outfit.

You know, Wally, if you
do start working weekends,

you're not going have
much time for goofing off.

Yeah, but I don't
feel like goofing off

as much as I used to.

Boy, Wally, you're
really growing up.

Relax. It's only me.

You can stop pretending
you're doing your homework.

Hi, Eddie.

We weren't pretending
we were doing anything.

Don't give me
that stuff, squirt.

Hey, Wally, anything
new on the job front?

Well, my father was going
to talk to this friend of his

who manages the
Mayfield Dairies.

Look, Sam, that never works.

Your pop talks to the guy.

The guy says he'll look into it.

Maybe in a couple of weeks,

he calls you in
for an interview.

He says, "You'll be
hearing from us?"

Then next thing,
you're an old man

collecting Social Security,

and he still hasn't called you.

Oh, yeah?

This is a real good
friend of my father's.

And he even plays golf with him.

That's even worse.

Look, Wally, suppose
your pop skunks him.

The guy's going to
take it out on you.

Look, Eddie, it's
not going to hurt

for my father to talk to him.

Okay, but just
remember what I told you.

It's no use getting
our hopes up.

Oh, good afternoon, Mr. Cleaver.

Oh, hello, Eddie. Hi, fellows.

Uh, I'm glad you're here, Eddie.

You are?

Yeah, I talked to
Mr. Worden this afternoon

about a weekend
job for you fellows.

I think he may have
something for you.

Hey, that's great, Dad.

I was just telling Wally

that I knew you'd
come through for us, sir.

Well, I haven't come
through for you yet, Eddie,

but at least Mr. Worden
will talk to you.

You can stop by
tomorrow afternoon

and see him after school.

Oh, I certainly appreciate
this, Mr. Cleaver.

All right, Eddie.

You know what you are,
Eddie? You're a hypocrite.

I am not. And where did
you learn a word like that?

In school,

and it means a deceitful
person who's underhanded.

And if that doesn't fit you,
I don't know what does.

I tell you, the school system

is ruining the
youth of the nation.

They ought to teach you

a little respect for
your elders, kid.

You better lay off him, Eddie.
He might take a poke at you.

17th.

Uh-huh.

Oh, it's the day
we pay the tax bill.

No, it's the night we go to
the Rutherfords' for dinner.

I'd rather pay the tax bill.

You know you and
Fred have a good time

talking about fishing.

Oh, sure, I'll have
to listen all over again

about how he caught that
17-pound musky in Minnesota.

And that won't give
you a chance to talk

about the 26-pound
salmon you caught in Seattle.

That's about it.

Well, I'll talk to Gwen.

Maybe we can work it out so
you boys can get equal time.

Did you tell Wally that
you talked to Ted Worden?

Yeah, he and Eddie are going
by tomorrow for an interview.

Oh, you recommended
Eddie Haskell for a job, too?

Well, I mentioned
him to Ted. Why not?

Well, aren't you sort of
putting yourself on a spot.

Oh, I don't think so.

I just set up the
interview for Eddie.

He has to take it from there.

Well, if they do get the jobs,

I just hope Eddie's phony charm
doesn't hurt things for Wally.

I know what you mean.

That boy can be a
little annoying at times.

Excuse me, Mr. and Mrs. Cleaver.

Oh, uh, Eddie, I
thought you'd gone.

Oh, I'm just leaving.

And I want to say
again, Mr. Cleaver,

I think you're very considerate
to help me get this job.

That's quite all right, Eddie.

Thank you, sir.

Oh, Mrs. Cleaver, that
dress is very attractive.

That color is most becoming.

Oh, well, thank you, Eddie.

Good-bye, Mr. and Mrs. Cleaver.

Good-bye, Eddie.

Bye, Eddie.

Wasn't that nice
of him to say that?

I thought you just said
his charm was phony.

Well, I didn't say all the time.

- Hi, Mom.
- Hi, Beaver.

Well, how did the Junior
Football League come along?

Okay.

You don't sound very enthused.

Well, we were supposed to
play a practice game today,

but it ended up in a big beef

with everybody screaming
at everybody else.

You mean, they boys
got in an argument?

No, the parents did.

- Oh, hi, Beav.
- Hi, Dad.

Is Wally home?

I don't know. Hey,
Mom, is Wally home?

He's up in his room.

Uh, tell him I want to
see him, will you, please?

Hey, Wally, Dad
wants to see you!

Beaver, I could've done that.

Yeah, I know, Dad.

I was wondering why you
wanted me to call him for you.

What I wanted you to do...

Hey, Dad, you want to see me?

Oh, yeah, I think I've got
some good news for you.

Saw Mr. Worden today,

and you and Eddie must
have made a good impression.

He wants you to report for
work first thing in the morning.

Hey, that's great, Dad.

Here's the name of the
man you're supposed to see.

Oh, thanks a lot.

Thanks. I'm going
to call Eddie, okay?

Okay.

Hey, Dad, could you get me
a neat job like you got Wally?

Oh, well, I'm afraid you're
a little bit young, Beaver.

Anyway, with Wally
working weekends,

I'm going to need you to help
me with the lawn and the garden.

Okay, but working
around the house,

that isn't like
having a real job.

Well, why not, Beaver?
I'll pay you for it.

Yeah, I know, but every
time you do, you always say,

"This is the kind or work
I used to do for nothing."

I'm sorry, son.

I'll make a point not to
say that the next time.

Yeah, Eddie, we report
first thing in the morning.

Hey, that's real great, Sam.

- There's just one thing though.
- What's that?

Ask your dad how long
we get for coffee breaks.

I'll see, Eddie.

There you are, Beaver.

Thanks, Mom.

Wally, you all set?

Yeah, Mom, do I look okay?

Oh, yes, you look
fine. Here's your lunch.

Well, thanks.

Hey, Wally, you
should have a lunch box

instead of a paper sack.

Then you'd look like
a real working guy.

Well, I guess if
the job pans out,

I'll probably get one.

Oh, that's probably Eddie.

Hey, he's right on time.

Hey, but this is
just the first day.

- Hi, Eddie.
- Let's go, Cornelius.

The business world awaits.

Good morning Mrs.
Cleaver, Theodore.

Well, hello, Eddie.

Eddie, you're
wearing that to work?

That's your brand new jacket.

Yes, the $40 imported model

with the silk lining and
the reversible buttons.

Boy, I don't know.

Well, I guess we
better be going.

So long, Mom.

Here's your lunch.
Good luck, boys.

Thank you, Mrs. Cleaver.

Good-bye, little fellow.

Eh.

Eddie, how come you're
wearing that crazy outfit?

Look, Ellwood, you don't
want to look like a bum

around the secretaries.

Eddie, we're supposed to report

to the foreman of the
shipping department.

I don't think we're going to
be around any secretaries.

Come on now.

With the pull your dad has
with the manager of the place,

I wouldn't be surprised
if we had our own offices.

And I want all that stuff
loaded on the trucks

as fast as they come in.

Yes, sir.

All right, boy,
let's get with it.

But sir, I have on this
$40 imported jacket.

Okay, Peter Lawford,

there's a smock in there
if you want to wear it.

Thank you, sir.

That's very considerate of you.

All right, get a move on.
The customers are waiting.

Yes, sir.

Hey, boss,

you think those two new kids
are going to cramp our style?

The Cleaver boy might, but
we could use the other one.

Yeah.

His type is just
tailor-made for this set-up.

Thank you, Beaver.

You're welcome, Mom.

Hey, you feel better, Wally?

Yeah, I was pretty beat.
That shower helped.

Well, Wally, the
first day on the job

is always the hardest.

That's what you said
about school, Mom,

and then it got worse.

Boy, Beaver, you
know, you don't know

how lucky you've got it
until you start working.

Oh, I'm not complaining, Dad.

Oh?

No, I like working.

I think it's going to
work out real good.

Have they canned Eddie yet?

Beaver.

How's Eddie doing?

Oh, you ought to see
the way Eddie works.

Really?

Yeah, when the boss is around.

Oh.

But you don't
have to worry, Dad.

I think Eddie's
working out real good.

Well, I'm glad to hear that.

Yeah, the foreman's
seems to really like him.

Everybody likes Eddie at first.

Then they find out
what a fake he is,

and they want to croak him.

Beaver, you know,

if you can't say something
nice about somebody,

it's better not to say anything.

Okay.

I guess we better talk

about something
else besides Eddie.

- Good evening, Mr. Cleaver.
- Oh, hello, Eddie.

Uh, I just dropped
by to see Wally,

and incidentally, I'd
like to thank you again

for giving me the opportunity

to work for your
friend Mr. Worden.

Well, don't mention it, Eddie.

I'm really trying
to do my best, sir,

so as not to let you down.

Well, that's fine, Eddie.
Wally's upstairs in his room.

Thank you, sir.

Ward, you're frowning.

Yeah, Eddie was especially
polite to me tonight.

Here.

Oh, hi, Eddie.
How are you doing?

You know, something,
pal, we're working too hard.

Working too hard?

Eddie, we just started the job.

Don't get excited, Gladys.
I'm not thinking of quitting.

It's just that we can do better

than moving stuff around
on the loading dock.

Yeah, but that's
what we're hired to do.

I know, but we don't
have to be stuck with it.

This is America, the
land of opportunity.

Let's move onward and upward

to some job where
we can take it easy.

How?

We butter up the foreman.

Gee, Eddie, I don't know.

We can't lose.

We get next to the
foreman, and we're in.

My pop says that's
the way it works

in the jungle of
the business world.

Look, Eddie, I think if we do
a good job on the loading dock

and there's a better job
around, we might get it.

That's the way it works, friend.

We've got to operate, pal.

Operate.

- Excuse me, sir.
- Yeah?

I know it's quitting time,

but is there anything you
want me to do before I leave?

Uh, my friend is ready to leave,

but I thought that if there was
something I could do for you...

Yeah, well, there is something.

Yes, sir?

Those cartons of cup sundaes...

Take three cases down to
the end of the loading platform

and put them in the
trunk of that gray car.

The gray car.

Do that, and then you can leave.

Yes, sir.

But Eddie, why does he want
you to put the cartons in his car?

You got me. Give
me a hand, will you?

He probably gets
such a big discount,

he can afford to take ice
cream home wholesale.

Yeah, I suppose so.

You notice how I've already
got him obligated to me?

Yeah.

And this is only the beginning.

It's hard to tell just
how advantageous

a little favor like this can be.

Knock it off, will you, Eddie?

There's just the two of us here.

Come on. Let's go.

Hi, Eddie.

Hey, what are you doing
with a carton of ice cream?

What are you doing with
a carton of ice cream?

Is that any way to greet
the bearer of a priceless gift?

Gift? What are
you talking about?

I hung around the plant again

to see if there was anything
I could do for the foreman.

He told me to help
myself to a carton.

Yeah? How come?

Look, while you're
standing around yakking,

this stuff is melting.

Put it in the refrigerator.

Okay.

But I still can't figure out

why he'd give you a
carton of ice cream.

'Cause I've been
being nice to him,

and it's paying off.

Well, hi, you're home early.

I thought you were playing golf.

Well, I was, but it got through
sooner than I expected.

I know. You beat
Fred Rutherford,

and he got mad and quit.

No, not at all.

Fred won, and you
got mad and quit?

No, I play golf with Ted
Worden, and nobody got mad.

Oh, did he say how
Wally and Eddie are doing?

No, we didn't get into that.

Evidentially they're
doing all right.

Ted's a little upset though

about something that's
going on down at the plant.

Oh?

Yeah, there's
been some stealing.

He's looking into it.

Stealing?

Mm-hmm, some ice cream
cartons have been missing.

He can't account for them.

Well, Wally hasn't
even mentioned it.

No, Ted's keeping it
quiet down at the plant

until he has a
chance to check into it

and find out what's going on.

Well, dinner ready?

Hi, I didn't know
you guys were home.

Oh, we just got here, Beaver.

Ward, don't you think that...

Beaver, how many
times have I told you

not to eat ice cream
and candy and things

just before supper?

I know, Mom, but...

Well, then why do you go out

and buy things like that
and spoil your dinner?

Oh, I didn't buy it.

Then where did you get it?

In the refrigerator.

Where do you suppose
all this came from?

Mayfield Dairy
Ice Cream Division.

Hey, Mom, would it be
okay if I spoiled my supper

with two more spoonfuls?

I don't know, but I think
something just happened

to spoil your father's supper.

- Wally?
- Yeah, Dad?

Will you come down
here a minute, please?

Yeah, Dad,

and when I asked Eddie
where he got the carton from,

he said the foreman
gave it to him.

The foreman just
gave it to him like that?

Yeah, that's right.

He said that he's
been buttering him up

and now it's paying off.

You don't think the foreman's
stealing those cartons, do you?

I don't know, but there's
an investigation going on,

and if he is, he's
going to be caught.

Wow.

All right, Wally, don't say
anything about this to anyone.

But when you go back to
work, I don't want you to take

any ice cream
from anybody, okay?

Okay, Dad.

And you better tell
Eddie the same thing.

You don't need to
say anything more.

Just tell him not to accept
anything from anyone.

Now then, you fellows
just do your work,

and everything will
be fine. Understand?

Yeah, Dad. Yeah, I understand.

Eddie, did you hear what I said?

Yeah, I heard what you said,

and it's nothing but
a bunch of noise.

Look, Eddie, I'm just telling
you for your own good.

Just don't touch any
extra cartons for anybody.

You know, Wally, I
never thought this of you.

What are you driving at?

You're jealous.

Jealous? Jealous of what?

You're jealous of the way

I'm getting in good
with the foreman.

You can't stand me being
"palsy-walsy" with the boss,

and so you're trying
to queer it for me.

Look, Eddie, that's
got nothing to do with it.

I just don't want you
getting in trouble. That's all.

Oh, sure.

Haskell.

I need you down here a minute.

You can keep on with
what you were doing.

Yes, sir.

Put these four cartons
in the trunk of my car.

Yes, sir.

Oh, and by the way, sir,

I want to thank you again

for the carton you
gave me the other day.

You must get a pretty good
price to take home so much.

Yeah, I get a good price.

Now, do what I told you, huh?

Yes, sir.

Young man.

Oh, how do you do, Mr. Worden?

What are you doing
with these cartons?

Oh, I was about to
put them in this car, sir.

And then what?

Oh, I'll go right back
to loading the truck.

Is this your car?

Oh, no, sir, this
is the foreman's.

Excuse me, Mr. Worden.

What's going on here, Haskell?

I thought I told you to
load that truck back there.

Yes, sir. I mean, no, sir.

Don't you remember

you told me to put
these cartons in your car?

My car?

What are you trying
to pull off here?

But, sir... I'll
take care of this.

You better come
along with me, son.

Hey, where do you
think you're going?

Well, Eddie looks like
he's in some kind of trouble.

I want to see what's going on.

You stay out of this.

Stay out of what?

Never you mind. Just stay
away from your stupid friend,

or you'll end up
in trouble, too.

Look, Eddie's a friend of mine,

and I'm going to
see what's wrong.

Hey, what's Worden
doing with Haskell?

Caught him putting
cartons in my car.

I told you not to drag
any kids into this.

I told you that
Haskell kid was stupid.

I know, but I didn't know
any kid could be that stupid.

Then Mr. Worden
isn't blaming Eddie.

No, after I told him
everything I knew

and Eddie told him
everything he knew,

Mr. Worden figured out

that it was the foreman
and his assistant

who were swiping the ice cream.

They were selling it to
stores on the way home.

Boy, that Eddie thinks
he's such a wise guy.

You'd think he'd have
sense enough to know

when that guy gave him
a whole box of ice cream

that it was stolen or something.

Hmm.

Well, I guess Eddie was
so busy being a big shot,

he didn't know anything.

Well, you can concentrate
so hard on being smart

that you do a lot
of stupid things.

Yeah, I guess so.

- Excuse me.
- Yeah, sure.

Hey, I'd like a little
more coffee, please.

Oh, hi, Eddie.

Hi.

Wally, is your dad home?

Well, yeah, he's
in the dining room.

Why? Do you want to talk to him?

No, but would
you tell him for me

that I'm sorry I messed up
the job he helped us get?

I was so busy buttering up
the guys down at the plant

that I didn't even know
what was going on.

Honest, I didn't.

Look, Eddie, I know that.

And I think my father does, too.

Yeah, well, would you
tell your father for me

that I'm a big, stupid dope?

Don't worry about it, Eddie.

I think he's kind of
suspected it for years.

Hey, Wally, how come
you're lying around?

I thought that's why you
got the job in the first place...

So you could have money so
you could go out on Saturday night.

Yeah, but I'm too beat, Beav.

Boy, you know, we must
have trucked a thousand cases

of that ice cream and junk.

Telephone, Wally.

Be right there, Dad.

Hello?

Oh, hi, Mary Ellen.

Huh?

Well, I'd have to shower
and change clothes,

but that won't take long.

Yeah. Yeah, a show sounds great.

You want to go where afterward?

Well, yeah, I guess
that'll be okay.

Okay, yeah. Yeah, I'll see you.

I got to shower and
change and get out of here.

Boy, Wally, you sure
got un-tired in a hurry.

Wally, I heard you mention
going out after the show.

Does that mean you're
going to be out late?

Boy, I hope not.

I'm not staying there
any longer than I have to.

Staying where, Wally?

The ice cream parlor.

Closed-Captioned By J.R.
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