Kitchen Nightmares (2007–2014): Season 3, Episode 3 - Bazzini - full transcript
Gordon takes a trip to Bazzini, where the food is hard, cold, and sticks to the plate and can pass as a wall ornament. And in the kitchen, the chef/owner who think's it's fine and is not too susceptible to criticism.
(upbeat music)
- This week I'm in Derby for
my biggest challenge yet,
a god awful Italian restaurant
that's stuck in a timewarp.
It sounds like prices
that were in existence
fucking 10, 15 years ago.
A truly miserable kitchen.
- I've been saying it
for three days,
we haven't got a pot washer,
nobody's done a fucking
thing about it.
- With appalling food.
The chicken's raw
and I don't wanna catch
salmonella in fucking Derby.
Unless I can help her,
new owner Daniella has
just spent half a million
quid on a sinking ship.
- Well, we might as well
close down now
and I can save my money.
(knife whooshing)
(upbeat music)
- [Gordon] When La Gondola
opened in 1968,
its Italian owners brought
the glamour of Venice
to dowdy Derby,
and it instantly became
the place to be seen.
- You couldn't get
into this place
unless you booked two or
three weeks in advance,
the place was packed.
It had wonderful atmosphere
and it had a reputation
of being the best
restaurant in Derby.
- Daniella celebrated
her 21st birthday
at La Gondola, she even got
married in the restaurant.
She loves it so much six months
ago she bought the company,
but just what has she bought?
(upbeat music)
Cor, fucking hell.
Marbella in Derby, fucking
hell, look at the size of it.
A 125 seater restaurant with
a 21 bedroom hotel attached,
a big undertaking, especially
if the state of the outside
is anything to go by.
Fuck me, even the
gondola looks fucked.
Hello.
- [Daniella] Hello,
good evening Mr. Ramsay.
- Gordon.
- Gordon.
- And?
- Daniella.
- Daniella, how are you?
- Fine.
- Good.
- All the better
for seeing you, thank you
for coming to our restaurant.
- Not at all.
God, it's a, it's like
going back in time.
- It is, it's a bit
of a time warp.
- [Gordon] And how old is it?
- Nearly 40 years old.
- Really?
Even the floorboards are.
- I know, creaky.
- Creaking as well, fantastic.
Anyone under there?
- No, there's the wine cellar
where I keep my lovely old wine.
- Oh, okay.
- So, yes,
so don't fall through it.
- Fantastic.
It's Friday night and
eight o'clock
and we can hear a few
clinking plates in there,
but the place sounds empty.
How many's booked for dinner?
- Four.
- [Gordon] Four?
- Yes, a table of four,
and that's all.
And that is our problem,
we have this
beautiful restaurant
and it's empty most of the time.
- One question I've got to ask,
why the hell did you buy it
if you've never run a
restaurant or a hotel before?
- Well, when my mother died
and I went through a divorce,
it was the one thing one
night that kept me going,
and I just thought
that's what I'll do,
I'll buy La Gondola.
And all night long I just
dreamt of this place.
- Oh, some customers
coming now outside.
Okay.
Good night.
- [Customer] Goodnight.
- Did you enjoy dinner?
- Yes thanks.
- Excellent.
Damn, I think they left
their teeth on the table.
From its 70s chandeliers
to its plastic flowers,
the restaurant
is well and truly past it.
(slow soothing jazzy music)
It's like stepping back
in time in there.
- It is, and I wondered whether
should we really decorate it
or wait 'til the fashion
turns and come back to it?
I mean.
- Gosh!
But it will be too late
if the business goes down
the pan first.
Everywhere you look,
it's like a
flashback to the 70s,
even the food sounds,
you know, that dated.
Smoked salmon, honeydew
melon with port,
warm brie with a tomato tart.
The menu is massive,
nearly 100 dishes,
and very few of them
actually Italian.
I'd like to start with the
spaghetti bolognese please.
- Spaghetti bolognese.
- Yeah, 'cause the
food's Italian.
- Yes.
- So it's fresh spaghetti?
- It is.
- Thank you.
I've ordered the simplest
starter on the menu,
but it seems to be
taking a very long time.
- Get him on some fucking
proper spaghetti now,
he's gonna get that fucking
ancient shit that was in there.
Gareth, Gareth, Gareth,
Gareth, you, you do it.
(upbeat music)
- I do apologise for the wait.
- Don't worry, problem
in the kitchen?
- That pasta's been freshly
cooked to order sir.
- Oh, lovely, nice.
Thank you.
He apologised about the wait
because, he said, the
pasta was cooked to order.
Which you've only got four
customers in the evening,
fucking right it's gonna
be cooked to order.
Big portions, for a starter.
At £6.50 it's huge.
A mountain of spag bol
and a salmon main course
to come, all for £6.50.
No wonder they're losing money.
- Right, Gareth, see if
you can get a little tin
of lobster soup open
without them seeing you.
- I've just seen
something very dodgy,
they're silver serving
the vegetables,
and even in 1999 silver
service on vegetables
like that was 25 years too late.
The salmon is also massive
and, like the restaurant,
a bewildering trip through time.
As the years have progressed,
they've just added more onto it.
Oh, fuck it, it's 1975, let's
stick a mussel on there.
Oh, fuck it, it's 1980,
let's stick some mange
tout on there.
Do you know what, it's
1985, ratatouille's in,
stick some ratatouille on there.
And it's 1990, welcome
back the roast spud.
Quantity not quality, a
classic 1970s mistake.
Surprise, surprise,
Head Chef Steve Strawn,
started here in 1975.
I've never seen such massive
portions in my entire life.
It doesn't need the prawns,
it doesn't need the mussels.
- It's described on
the menu as that
so I've gotta follow it through
with what's on the menu.
- But, I mean, you've been
here for that length of time,
you could change that
and just do a simple poached
salmon dish without all that.
- I could do, I could do, yeah.
- You know, there's two
ways in this industry,
you move with the times,
or the times moves you.
And, unfortunately, you've
been caught in a time warp.
(upbeat music)
In my experience, when a
restaurant's been stuck in a rut
for so long rot
starts setting in,
staff get really lazy,
they start cutting corners,
and I really need to discover
exactly what's going on here.
Today there's a 70th birthday
party in the restaurant.
Functions are the life
blood of La Gondola,
but there's not even enough
of those to stop it
dying on its arse.
- At the moment for this year
I've got nine weddings booked,
but really we should be aiming
for about 30 weddings a year
and then that would
be very nice.
- [Gordon] With 25 covers
it's a chance for me to see
how the kitchen copes
when they have more than
four people through the door.
- [Gareth] I've done
four of four.
- [Gareth] 10 minutes in, the
kitchen's already in trouble.
They've run out of
fresh tuna steaks.
- [Steve] You know what you're
going to have to do, plan B.
- Fuck knows what they're
gonna do, it's called plan B.
Do you know about plan B?
- Plan B?
- Plan B.
- Plan B, no.
- No?
- No I don't.
- What's plan B when
it's at home?
- [Gareth] Tins.
- Oh, tins, that's what
it means, right.
Tinned tuna banged out
on limp lettuce.
My gran would have been
ashamed to have served that.
It doesn't feel like a kitchen,
no energy, no excitement,
no passion really and sort
of care and love for food.
Just get it the bowl and
fuck off out of here.
Now there's a problem
with the mains.
- [Female Customer] Oh, sorry,
it's no sauce on the salmon.
- Oh, no sauce, all, all plain?
- All plain, yeah.
- Where does it say
plain on there?
So it doesn't.
Well, there's nothing I
can do about that.
- [Gordon] Steve's
straight on the phone
to Stella, the business manager.
- Yeah, but doesn't say
plain on the menu does it?
We never serve it plain.
Chef's wrong again,
never the office.
- Is it sorted?
- Not really.
Sort it out on Monday.
- [Stella] It would've
said lobster sauce
if you wanted lobster sauce.
- [Gordon] Stella cocked up
the order for the lobster sauce
but instead of rolling up
his sleeves up
and getting on with it,
Steve picks a fight.
- [Steve] Are you going
upstairs Stella?
- [Stella] Why?
- I just asked Daniella to come
wash some pots, that's all.
- Why, haven't we got
a pot washer?
- I've been saying it
for three days,
we haven't got a pot washer
and nobody's done a
fucking thing about it.
- [Stella] Well, you're in
charge of the kitchen Steve,
it's your department, you
should see Dan.
- You wash your
hands of it then.
- [Gordon] While they're
all bickering,
the waiters are still
serving the main course.
It's a shambles.
La Gondola wants to be
a high class restaurant
and yet they're slopping out
reheated catering rubbish.
Belgium apple pie.
What's Belgium about it?
Do you buy them in?
- [Steve] Yeah.
- [Gordon] Oh, okay, right.
- [Steve] Yeah, yeah.
- But from a chef to
chef's point of view,
you know damn well
an apple pie..
- Oh, yeah, exactly.
- We could do it with
our eyes closed.
- Yeah, yeah, exactly.
- So are you telling me
now that you're happier
to buy them in rather
than make them?
- At this moment, no.
I'm happier to make them myself,
but I don't have the staff
with the skills
or the time to do it.
- Oh, okay.
How long does it take
to make an apple pie?
- Half an hour, 40 minutes.
- [Gordon] Microwaving?
- [Steve] Yeah, yeah.
- What this guy needs
is a rocket up his arse.
Well, this is a fucking
doddle for you isn't it?
- Yep.
- It's not exactly ball
breaking here is it?
- Has been in the past
and it can be.
- No, stop going back,
talk today.
It's almost like we're paying
for your memories again.
- [Steve] No, no,
today is quiet.
- [Gordon] Right.
- Bring it back, I'll
still handle it.
- Fucking hell, okay.
Daniella sank half a
million quid
of her divorce settlement
into La Gondola,
but last year alone it
lost 75 grand.
If she doesn't open her eyes
to what's happening
in her kitchen,
she'll be left with nothing
but memories and debts.
Let's be brutally honest, you
fell in love with the place
and you grew up in it,
and you had your 21st birthday
party, had your wedding here,
and you have bought a
fucking time bomb.
I've never seen a
kitchen like that
that just has so little
atmosphere, no banter,
no communication, no
vibrant, let's get ready
for a great lunch.
It was turkey going in, cooked
the day before, reheated.
- I'm horrified that
we had that.
You're telling me a
discerning customer
cannot tell the difference.
- Yeah, but I think what
we've really got to pick up on
and wake up on is the
fact that your chef
can lose his self esteem
by serving that shit.
They've carved a very
comfortable
niche out for themselves
and they've made a really
comfortable bed to lie in,
and unfortunately you're
paying the price for that.
(knife whooshes)
I'm pretty pissed off,
you know that?
I'm not happy,
because what I saw
yesterday, across the board,
I thought was a
fucking disgrace.
(upbeat music)
La Gondola in Derby.
At first I thought this
restaurant's problem was
that it was stuck in
a time warp,
but it goes far
deeper than that.
(upbeat music)
It's 10 o'clock and Head Chef,
Steve,
and his number two, Gareth,
are only just rolling
up for work.
You wouldn't get away
with that in my kitchen,
especially as last year the
restaurant lost 75 grand.
These guys just don't
seem to be interested
in turning the place around.
How much has the restaurant
taken this week, barely.
- Yeah.
- 500 quid, yeah?
The salaries alone in the
kitchen are 1000 pounds.
If the restaurant didn't
have these functions
that are drip feeding
into this establishment.
You wouldn't have a job.
I personally want to
put a fucking rocket up
everyone's arse in here today
to really make them understand
what you should be doing
and not bickering
and festering on fucking
memories from 20 years ago.
That means fuck all.
(slow jazzy music)
It's Sunday lunchtime
and there are three
diners at La Gondola.
When there isn't a function on,
well, nothing much
happens in this kitchen.
- Right, we are away?
- We're away.
Chef's away as well, he's been
away for 30 fucking years.
Mains away chef please.
- Not quite ready yet.
Not quite ready.
- [Gordon] This kitchen
is like a retirement home.
So how many evenings do
you work a week?
- [Gareth] Three.
- [Steve] Three to four,
depends on the business really,
you know, just play it by ear.
It varies.
- Yeah, what a bizarre set-up.
Good afternoon.
- [Customers] Good afternoon.
- Welcome back.
- [Female Customer] Thank you.
- Now, you've been coming for?
- [Female Customer] 36 years.
- [Gordon] 36 years?
- Yes.
- [Male Customer] Yes.
- [Gordon] Wow, amazing.
So you are the asset?
- [Female Customer] Yes.
- So, if the food was to
change you wouldn't come back?
- [Female Customer] No.
- [Gordon] No.
What have you got?
You've got Minestrone soup.
- [Male Customer]
Minestrone soup.
- [Female Customer] Yes.
- [Gordon] But La
Gondola are goin have
to risk losing their
three regular diners
because this is a
terrible environment
for an aspiring young chef.
Number two, Gareth, is only
19 but he's already given up.
It must be soul destroying
when the business is so quiet,
no?
Motivation-wise, no?
- [Gareth] It's boring.
- [Gordon] Yeah, very boring.
- When it's quiet you're just,
like,
clock watching until it's
10 o'clock so you can go,
because you can't go early
in case someone does come.
- [Gordon] No.
- So it's just,
you're just clock
watching all the time and.
- [Gordon] Yeah.
I've only seen one person
in this kitchen
with any real drive or ambition,
and that's 17 year old
apprentice Danny Holborn.
Are you alright Danny boy?
You're doing a fucking good job.
- Yeah, yeah, my pleasure.
- That's where it all
started, you know that?
I've been in there.
Lonely place in amongst
all those bubbles.
But, trust me, if you get
your shit together there
it goes from bubbles on
top of the sink
to bubbles in glasses
of champagne.
Would you like a glass
of champagne?
- I'm not old enough.
- Fuck it, we'll sneak it
in the fridge.
- [Danny] Okay then.
- Yeah?
- [Danny] Yeah.
- [Gordon] Young chefs
need encouragement,
but discipline is high on
Steve's list of priorities.
- [Steve] I don't stand
any nonsense.
- [Gordon] You don't
stand any nonsense?
- No, and if these don't
make it they go.
I've told them all.
Out, I'm not standing
for nothing.
This one might not
last the week.
- [Gordon] Oh, really?
What for?
- Yesterday, yesterday
was very close.
I don't hang around with one
warning and two warnings.
- [Gordon] No?
- They're out the fucking back
door mate, simple as that.
- So what you're saying
is you're worse than me?
- No, what I'm saying
is I don't like shit.
- Yeah.
- [Steve] Out they go,
isn't that right Gareth?
If you're no good you walk.
- Steve thinks he can
talk the talk,
but can he really walk the walk?
It's time I checked
out his store cupboard.
Cor, fucking hell.
Fucking evidence.
So, I mean, it looks like
fish food doesn't it, huh?
And it smells
fucking disgusting.
There you go, half a container
of plastic Minestrone soup.
Right.
Now, we've seen it all, Smash.
What in the fuck a chef
does with that I don't know.
The new owner Daniella
wants La Gondola
to be an authentic
Italian restaurant,
and yet she's completely unaware
of what's happening in
her own kitchen.
The minestrone soup is
quite a hallmark.
- It is, it's very good,
it's excellent,
almost as good as my mother's.
Yeah, it's great.
- Why do you buy it in Steve?
- I don't buy it in.
I make it myself.
- So the containers of
bought in minestrone soup
and the invoices here.
- What we do, we'd
mix that 50/50.
We'll sort of give half
and half really.
It, it seems to be.
- [Gordon] I'm not clear,
what do you mean, two bowls,
one of plastic and one?
- No, no, no, no, no, no.
We'd make half up
with part packet
and then put fresh
into it as well.
- [Gordon] Steve's penny
pinching by bulking up
the fresh soup with powdered,
but the prices are so
out of date on the menu,
they're haemorrhaging
money on a daily basis.
The cost of the lamb, nothing
more, just the lamb cutlets.
- [Steve] Yeah.
- That whole dish, okay, should
be on the menu at £16.50.
- [Steve] Right.
- You're selling it at £10.90.
And the scary thing is, Steve,
that you don't know that
every time we sell that lamb.
- [Steve] Yeah.
- We're losing five quid.
- [Steve] Yeah, yeah.
- And if we had a table
of four in today
and they walked in that door,
I swear to god it would
be a lot easier
to fucking stop them at the door
and say there's your £5
and fuck off.
- Well, we might as well
close down now
and I can save my money.
You know, I'm guided by people
who've been here for years
and they're telling me they can
make money out of that menu.
- But you were here in place,
in position as the manager
when this was put
together, sorry, I'm sorry.
- [Daniella] Ah, yeah, so you
can blame me all you like,
but it's my money Steve,
not yours.
- Yes I know, yes I know
it's your money.
Let's carry on, let's
put a structure in place.
- [Gareth] What about
your daughter's party?
- Just a minute, just a minute.
Let's put a structure.
- £10 per room, £10 per meal.
Where was the money,
where, where was the money?
- Listen, it's my restaurant,
and all I needed to do
was cover costs, all right?
- Where was the money on that?
- And I did more than
cover costs on that.
- It's Stella who does all this,
not us.
Stella does this.
- Don't go off saying
this that and the other.
You could be out of a
job in a month's time.
- No one is taking
responsibility
for La Gondola's problems,
everyone just blames each other.
I look at you and I get
really nervous,
because I think you're
the kind of cook
that's just gonna fuck off
out of here, you know that?
I think you're going to
get upset one day,
after listening to the way
you spoke to the owner,
if that was me I would
have sacked you,
and my worry is you're
so determined
to fucking work in
this industry,
you need to get excited, you
need to start cooking properly.
I've got to get these guys
out of this god awful kitchen
and try and lift their morale,
so I'm taking them to see one
of Derby's most
successful businesses.
Yeah, Gareth, you drive.
We're gonna look at
some history.
Right, let's go and look at
something that's beautiful,
something that's
moved with time.
A Rolls Royce, 1933.
Look at it, beautiful.
Now, the next one is
something quite interesting
because this was made in 1979.
Look at it, a bit of history.
Rolls Royce didn't sit still,
yeah,
and get moved by the times,
they decided to move ahead
of the times, the Phantom.
What's it like in there Danny?
- [Danny] It's nice and comfy.
- Nice and comfy?
- It looks like I mean business.
- Steve, see what I'm
trying to say?
They've moved on.
They haven't just stood
there and sort
of expected Rolls Royce to sell.
And, unfortunately, big boy,
when I first saw your food,
I felt like I was stepping
in a time capsule.
- Yeah, I get your point,
it's marvellous,
it's marvellous, absolutely.
- I know a chef who's got
one of these, you know that?
And you're thinking,
Gareth, what shall I do,
rob a bank or work hard?
- Rob a bank.
- Rob a bank?
Fucking hell, bollocks.
Shall we nip round and see
your mum Danny?
The engine that powers
any successful restaurant
is its kitchen, and
like Rolls Royce,
La Gondola is gonna have to
create its own modern classics.
I'm starting with
the lunch menu.
What's the secret behind
any good Italian restaurant?
- Pasta.
- [Gordon] Pasta, exactly.
When was the last time
you made fresh pasta?
- Never have.
- Here we go, you're making it,
I'm just gonna tell you
how to make it.
So make a well in the centre.
I'm keeping it simple so
the chefs have got time
to get up to speed.
Out goes the old two course
lunch menu for £6.50,
in comes a fresh pasta
main with a salad
and a glass of wine for £8.95.
See the colour is
starting to change now
because the saffron's
working on that.
Fresh pasta is the hallmark
of an authentic
Italian restaurant,
its simplicity also
makes it a money-spinner.
Far cheaper than those
expensive lamb specials.
See the colour of it, all of it?
Ricotta in?
And I want you to taste
it as you're doing it.
Now, okay, watch.
Yeah, like a parcel, exactly,
look.
Fold it over, nip all
the air out.
Little finger, over, left
to right, right to left,
use your thumb and push.
Tortellini, who'd like a go?
Yeah, of course you can
have a go, here we go.
We've only been making
pasta for 10 minutes
and already the young chefs look
like they're
enjoying themselves.
I've finally injected some
passion into this kitchen.
Good.
And that you've just done,
that was 10 minutes ago,
that was your first one.
Yeah, hey, no, but
that's your first,
you've never made pasta
and now you've made your
first ever Tortellini.
That's very good.
I've asked Danny,
the apprentice,
to come up with a couple
of salads for the new menu.
- Right, what I've
done is I've put,
like, tomato and that in
the mixing bowl.
- Good.
- And then with the shallots
and then you put like this,
like the salt and vinegar
stuff over it.
- [Gordon] Good.
- And I've already mixed.
- [Gordon] Okay, have a
little taste, eat with me.
And this one is a?
- It is rocket and
Parmesan cheese.
- That's lovely.
But La Gondola's problems
aren't just in the kitchen.
To help me re-launch
this sinking ship,
I've called in the boss
of the company
that does all my restaurant PR,
Jo Barnes.
What do you reckon?
- Well, it certainly
makes a first impression.
- [Gordon] Up the creaky stairs.
- Wow.
- Hi Dan.
- Hello.
- Amazing chandelier.
- And look at the dance floor
and just how many heels
have been dancing on this.
- [Jo] And you can kind of
see El Becko doing a special.
- [Gordon] Yeah.
- On, you know, interiors
frozen in time.
- Yeah.
Yeah, and do you think
there's a sellable asset here?
Do you think you could
sell this restaurant?
My first feelings
when I come in,
and I don't mean to be negative,
are start all over again.
This place badly needs
refurbishment.
You could refurb it, you
could call it a new name
and start over and
really re-launch it.
However, being real.
- [Gordon] They haven't
got the money.
- Fine.
- [Gordon] No.
- What it does have is a
tremendous amount
of authenticity and
kind of kitschy appeal.
- Yeah.
- And I love the sort of,
you know, the Doric columns
and the dance floor, and I
suppose you've gotta work
with what you've got.
- [Gordon] Daniella and
her business manager Stella
need Jo's help, because so
far their marketing efforts
have hardly set Derby alight.
- I can't even find it on here.
- [Daniella] It's supposed to be
under restaurants,
under continental.
- [Gordon] Oh, there we go.
Jesus Christ!
So we go past all these
relaxing massage
and all these whore houses
and you come down here
and then you get
"La Gondola, try our new menus.
"Bookings now being taken."
I mean, you know,
you've missed it.
- I think what you've
got to do is identify
what your real
strengths are here,
and that's the family
run business,
that's the great space you've
got with the dance floor,
and make them into
selling points.
You've got to have a
punchy message
with which you can appeal
to your potential customers.
- Now the restaurant
reputation's disappeared,
yet you've got.
- The reputation hasn't
disappeared, the problem is
that people have forgotten
about La Gondola.
It hasn't got a bad
reputation, definitely not.
Nine times.
- [Gordon] So this is a
good reputation?
See, again, you're
living in the past.
- Medium, medium.
- I feel you're not being
honest with yourself.
It has a shit reputation.
- [Stella] It hasn't.
- [Gordon] I'm
telling you it has.
- So you've been to Derby
and you've had a word
with all of the customers?
- [Gordon] Yeah, no,
hold on a minute.
- And none of them are happy?
- All of the customers?
There are no customers,
the place is empty.
- So you're telling me
that the people
who put adverts in the
paper thanking us
for a superb wedding, etcetera.
- [Gordon] You're
missing my point.
- None of them are happy?
- If you just listen to
what I'm trying to tell you,
it may make sense in a minute.
The add-ons
from having a successful
restaurant is phenomenal.
We haven't got that
reputation any longer.
The business is on its arse,
and the functions over the
last 10 years have depleted.
Accept it, there is no
reputation at La Gondola.
And if you're going
to stand there
and tell me it's a good place
when the chef buys in
minestrone soup
No chance.
(upbeat music)
We need to spread the
word around Derby
that La Gondola is changing.
So I've told Stella to
get on the phone
and round up members of the
city's business community
for a special lunch.
A great way to get
the message out
and a chance to see if
Steve can lead his team.
- My father used to come
here for business lunches
about 25 years ago, right.
But in recent times I have
to say it's not a place
that I would have come to.
- The idea of this lunch today
is to get them in and out
in 45 minutes.
We've banished silver service
to speed up the waiters,
but can Steve run his kitchen
fast enough to keep up?
- Whether we're busy, quiet,
makes no difference to me.
I only know one way and
that's the way I do it.
- Yeah, are you ready
to roll with this, yeah?
- Yeah.
- Good man.
This is the exciting
part of the day, yeah?
Okay, let's see, I want you
to clean round the plates.
- Yeah.
- Be a good boy, let's go.
- One fritatta, one
bruchetta, one Tagliatelle.
- [Gordon] Nice.
The new pasta dishes I've
devised are hitting the spot.
- Table three sends
their compliments.
- That's a first.
- Quality, yeah, not bad.
Very good price as well, but
a little bit slow coming out,
just a little bit slow
when people are having a
business lunch.
- But, once again,
the lack of organisation has
dropped the kitchen in it.
Jesus Chris.
Come on guys there's
gotta be a system
in here somewhere.
Steve?
If you're confused, yeah,
let me know
and I'll help you out, yeah?
- [Steve] Okay.
- 'Cause it's gone all quiet,
you see?
You're not leading like a
head chef, do you understand?
Where all these three
guys, including Danny,
is coming together at
the same time.
But they've gotta take your
direction, you know that?
- [Steve] Yes.
- Outside in the restaurant
there are lots of
customers waiting,
but all the orders have
become mixed up.
You sent table four, yeah?
Three Tagliatelle,, one
gnocchi, one Bruchetta.
- [Steve] Yeah.
- They've sent them,
they've just come back,
they're on coffee, you've
already sent their main course.
And now a whole table
has got the wrong dishes.
Start again, anyway, it's
gone stone cold.
What about the starters
on table eight?
- They've had it already.
- They've had them?
Why is it not crossed off Steve?
Fucking, no wonder the
kitchen's confused.
Its so important that.
If you've sent the starters
why aren't you crossing it off?
- Right, table two for
starters, yeah, this is.
- [Gordon] That was
just 35 covers.
I'm planning to completely
re-launch the restaurant
in only a couple of days' time
with double the number
of customers.
I'm starting to wonder if
Steve really is up to it.
What has come out of
today's lunch,
you know that, is how everyone
just works on their own,
you know that?
- [Steve] Yeah.
- I've seen no fucking team
spirit here whatsoever.
- [Steve] No, no.
- No understanding, no
co-ordination
and bringing these guys together
has been a fucking nightmare.
- [Steve] I know.
- Fucking hell, I tell
you, I'm finding it hard,
I'm finding it really
fucking hard.
Because it's not about
teaching an old boy new tricks,
it's about getting the
old boy to wake up
and stop being a lazy bastard.
A simple risotto, bruschetta,
fritatta, tagliatelle
of chicken and they're
still in the shit.
La Gondola is up the
creek without a paddle.
The kitchen's getting by
with bought-in apple pies,
and the staff don't
pull together.
- I never know which way
you have it you poof.
- [Gordon] In less
than 48 hours,
new owner Daniella is
re-launching the restaurant.
- I woke up at five
o'clock this morning.
Don't often swear, but I
was shit scared.
- [Gordon] The trouble
is Daniella's Head Chef
has been treading water,
opening a tin of tuna
or a packet of powdered soup.
I want to redesign the
menu for the re-launch,
but what can Steve
actually cook?
I've asked him to prepare me
a dish fresh ingredients only.
So, what's in there, butter?
- [Steve] We've got butter.
- Red onions.
- [Steve] Red onions, a
little bit of olive oil.
- Yeah.
- Fennel, fresh fennel,
and just a little bit
of orange zest.
Flour.
- And where did this
idea come from?
- When I was a commis we
used to do it,
when I worked down in Oxford.
- [Gordon] So 35 years ago?
- [Steve] Quite a long time,
yeah, yeah.
- [Gordon] Steve is
cooking me a dish
of rustic Italian trout.
- That smells gorgeous.
And then we can dress it up.
- I was a little bit miffed
when you were frying the trout,
the fact you hadn't taken
the scales off.
- [Steve] Right.
- So when I've got to eat this
with a pile of shit in my mouth.
Why didn't you scale the fish?
- [Steve] Sorry, just
time it was.
- Time?
- [Steve] Yeah.
- It looks like you forgot.
I think that's pretty dismal,
for a 51 year old chef
to produce that pile of
shit I'm fucking gobsmacked.
The scales are on there, it's
all on the roof of my mouth,
the fucking alcohol's
not burnt off,
it's, fucking hell Steve.
After Steve's dismal effort,
I want to find out if the
other chefs can do any better.
Tuna's very tasty.
You don't need that sauce.
For me, you've just
fucked that dish
by putting that glue on there.
That sort of gallopy,
stodgy wallpaper paste that,
in fact I'd offer
that to Daniella
to fucking plaster the front
of La Gondola, you know that,
'cause that looks like a
pile of shit there as well.
What's that, what's
that in there?
- [Chef] Inside?
- [Gordon] Yeah.
Oh, the, the chicken's inside?
- [Chef] Yeah.
- Is this a Polish dish?
- No, no.
- [Gordon] The chicken's raw.
- [Chef] Raw.
- Now unfortunately I
can't afford
to fuck off and die right now,
and I don't want to catch
Salmonella in fucking Derby,
so put that straight in the bin,
yeah?
I've been poisoned once before
and it's not gonna
fucking happen again.
It's so scary, we really
are in trouble here.
I've never sent this message
out before in a restaurant,
I'd tell them fucking move
your arse, get on with it,
otherwise you're out.
But I'm gonna tell you
guys to stop and give up,
don't fight it if you
don't want to change.
And when that change comes in,
be prepared to work
fucking hard.
We've got to get rid of
all this crap.
We can't carry 80, 89 dishes.
What's it like when this
man's off for the night
and you've got 25 booked?
It must be mad, no?
When you cook like that
do you actually think
that you're fit enough
to call yourself a chef
if you're defrosting things
and deep frying mushrooms?
- No.
- And is it important
for you to cook
or are you really
seriously interested
in staying the way you are?
- [Gareth] Cook.
- You are, you, you
definitely wanna cook?
Yeah, away.
There's nothing complicated
in a this, you know that?
The only option is to
go right back to basics.
I've devised a new dinner menu
that's so simple hopefully
it's foolproof.
A light gnocchi with
salmon and tarragon.
And a simple tomato
and mozzarella risotto.
That tomato it's just
a little bit too thick.
- [Steve] Too thick, yeah.
- Even this kitchen surely
can't cock these dishes up.
Fresh fragrant mix, stand
up please Steve.
Thank you.
Gareth, it's really hard
for you to understand at 19
how modern we're trying
to put the approach.
- [Gareth] Sure.
- [Gordon] Yeah?
Nothing's coming out of a
fucking packet,
nothing's coming out underneath,
cooked fucking three days ago,
it's just clean, fresh,
and just think back to
that Phantom, that Roller.
Is it worth getting out
of bed in the morning?
- Yeah.
- [Gordon] Yes,
fucking right it is.
Real easy, okay, yeah.
So it doesn't all stick.
Danny's never been given
his own section,
so I'm going to see how he
does with the vegetables.
You've got to look after
them, you know that,
almost as if you're sort
of in love with them.
- [Danny] Yes Gordon.
- [Gordon] Well, beautiful
- [Danny] It's warm ain't it?
- It's very warm isn't it?
Huh, welcome to the real
world of the kitchen big boy,
you're sweating.
- Yeah.
- That looks cool.
- First time.
- Is it the first time
you've sweated?
- In the kitchen, yeah.
- Good man.
Yeah, so have you done
the peppers, yeah?
The aubergine?
The butternut squash?
- Yes.
- And now, all of a sudden,
big boy,
over the last couple of hours,
yes,
you've been running the
vegetable section.
Move your arse.
We now have a new contemporary
menu for the re-launch.
Time to chuck out the chintz.
Stella, let me ask
you something.
You're sat, just come
and touch this a minute
and close your eyes and
just touch it.
- [Stella] Close my
eyes and touch it?
- Yeah.
- Horrible.
- Fucking disgusting.
Dirty, grubby, smelly,
plastic flowers, yeah?
The clutter on the tables,
Martin,
looks like it's come out
of the fucking pound shop.
You know, you're like an
old fucking woman
that just won't throw
anything away.
Get rid of it.
- [Martin] It's going tonight.
- Good.
It's like going to a, an
airport lounge
and looking at one of the
chapels of rest.
It's the kind of thing
you'd see in there
when you sort of sit
down and grieve.
I mean, I'm sorry, but
they are fucking awful.
Catch, get hold of them all
and lob them in the skip, yeah?
- Pleasure.
- Good man.
Already, I feel like,
fucking hell,
I've got rid of my granny's
pants, they're off,
they're no longer up here,
I'm starting to think about
wearing a nice sexy pair
of knickers, because
I've just seen
the white tablecloth go down.
That's how I feel in here.
- It looks clean and fresh.
- [Gordon] Yeah, would you wear
knickers up to there Stella?
- Oh, don't start Gordon.
Stick to the restaurant.
- [Gordon] I'm just asking.
Would you wear a pair of
woolly knickers up to here?
- No, no, I wouldn't.
- [Gordon] No, so get rid
of the flowers.
But I have discovered one thing
from the past worth
hanging onto.
- This is from the old
classic menu we used to have.
Yeah.
- [Gordon] All done
on the table?
- [Martin] All done
on the table.
- And now you've stopped it
because it's on the old menu?
- Yeah, I mean, at one
time Saturday nights used
to be just one person just
do the cooking all night.
- So you're taking that
to, what, lightly brown?
- Just nice and golden brown.
- I've asked Martin for a demo
because I think that
flambés are due a comeback.
Jesus Christ!
Do you miss this?
- Oh, yeah.
- [Gordon] You're so
fucking good at it.
- Yes, I hope so.
I try and do my best anyway.
- This should be the hallmark
of the restaurant this.
This is this is art.
Thank you.
- [Martin] My pleasure.
- Christ almighty!
If they taste as good
as they look,
they're going back on the menu.
They're to die for.
They are fucking delicious.
Who needs a wine list
when you can get pissed
on the dessert?
It's the day of the re-launch.
As well as bringing
back the flambés,
I've decided to resurrect
La Gondola's dance floor.
A house band is booked
and the waiting staff
finally look the part.
There will be 70
covers in tonight,
double the number of diners
that we had in for the
business lunch.
It's a real test for
the kitchen,
they're really gonna have
to pull together
if they want to carry it off.
I've put Danny in charge
of the staff dinner.
They don't normally
have them here
but they're a great way
to build team spirit.
The most important thing
about staff dinner, big boy,
is clearing out the fridge, yes?
So we've got to move now,
big boy,
we've got 10 minutes
to get this ready, yes?
Steve, I think he could really
take his own little sort
of world there doing these
staff lunches and that,
you know that, and
it'll give him
that little vote of confidence.
- [Steve] Yeah, why not?
- Unfortunately, Steve
doesn't seem very confident.
With only an hour until the
first guests arrive I'm worried.
You're running round
getting all your plates
and bits and bobs,
but I saw that a week
ago, you're all boxed off.
- No, I was intending to
go round in the morning
and just make sure everybody
knows what's going on tonight
and what I need, and
when I show up for it,
what I want when I want it.
- Yeah, but it's all very
well, it's in your mind,
but the problem is that,
you know.
- Yeah, like I'm saying,
I'm gonna talk to them now.
- It's sort of, you know.
- Yeah.
- Offloading it and getting
them to understand, yeah?
- Yeah, sure.
There's a feeling there
but I'm not sure if
it's nervousness or not.
I get stressed as much
as anybody else,
I'm only, I'm only human, so.
Maybe I get stressed more than
anybody else, I don't know.
- Oh, the risotto's gorgeous.
Congratulations Daniel,
that's really good.
- [Gordon] Steve,
you're not eating?
- [Steve] Well, I've had
two meals since last Friday.
- [Gordon] You've had two
meals since last Friday?
- [Steve] Yeah, I'm just
off it at the moment.
- Thank you.
I'm really worried about
Steve, he seems very nervous.
The menus we've got, yeah?
Everything is in place
and ready to roll,
but at the last minute
Steve bottles it.
Right, listen.
I'm running the
hotplate tonight.
I shouldn't really be
running the hotplate,
but Steve's asked if I'd
run the hotplate
to make sure that we
get up to speed, yeah?
Communication, chemistry,
understanding, yeah?
Working for each other, yeah?
Gareth, yeah, what are
we going to do tonight
if we get flustered
and frustrated,
what are you going to do?
- Ask for help.
- [Gordon] Yeah, and
take it out on your what?
- Pasta.
- That's right, you take it out
on your pasta, not Daniella.
Enjoy it, smile, I'll be behind
you every ounce of the way.
Smile.
Order on.
One tortellini, one parma
ham with figs,
one antipasto, one linguini.
Main course, one gnocchi, one
tuna, one salmon, one lamb.
Not one fucking answer.
Yes chef.
- Yes chef.
- [Gordon] Thank you, good boy.
I shouldn't be doing this.
Steve needs to be able to run
his kitchen properly himself,
so I'm only gonna get
him started.
So two minutes on the
hotplate, one gnocchi,
one tuna, one salmon, one lamb.
Steve, tomorrow
you're on your own,
and I just wish that
you implemented a system
like this 10 years ago,
big boy, you know that?
- [Steve] I do.
- So it wouldn't be so fucking
hard now at the age of 51.
- [Steve] Yeah.
- Thank you, 14, go.
Right, Gareth, watch the cooking
on the pasta please, yes?
Next time I'm gonna be
down on your bollocks.
Two lamb, one rib-eye, one tuna.
- Yes chef.
- Yeah, nicely, put it
on that plate nicely,
as if you're in love with it,
yeah?
Fresh tarragon on the top.
Come on.
How does it feel to be
cooking normally?
No, no, no.
- Different, different.
- [Gordon] Yeah, no, no,
no, no, I didn't ask that.
- It's exciting.
Once we get in the system
it'll be good.
- [Gordon] Yeah, it's the
only way Steve.
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
I can stay here and run this,
but you're fucking
benefiting jack shit mate.
- [Steve] True enough.
- Yeah, you're gonna have
to do it yourself now,
you know that?
- [Steve] Yeah.
- Run your kitchen, and
run your team.
- Yes chef.
- Okay, and if I hear you silent
and not talking to them, yeah?
Hey, I'm gonna ram that
fork up your ass.
- Nice, it's a big one.
- Yeah.
Fuckin' right.
(upbeat music)
For the first time in 15 years,
Martin's back cooking up
a storm with the flambé.
Good music, efficient and
stylish table service,
at last La Gondola is
swinging again.
- Three lamb, two rib-eyes,
one tuna.
Hannah, can you send
Joanna in please.
Don't understand what
all these arrows mean.
- So, two medium, one well done.
- That's a medium is it?
- Your first main course
is three lamb.
They haven't even started
clearing the starters yet, okay?
Thank you.
(upbeat music)
As the atmosphere in
the restaurant hots up,
the kitchen is going
into slow motion.
No.
Cross it off.
What about that other
table of four here?
Two rib-eye, one tuna,
one salmon.
- Okay.
- [Gordon] You've gone
all quiet again.
- Where's that salad, ready?
Right, tuna.
- [Gordon] When the kitchen
does get the food out,
it's going down a treat.
I've never seen a lady
clean her plate so quickly
in my life.
It's like taking a portable
dishwasher out for dinner.
- It's been beautiful, really,
really nice
to enjoy authentic Italian
cooking, very nice.
- If they, if they stand
up to the reputation
that they've set tonight
we'll come back.
(upbeat music)
- The new menu has
been a success,
but since I handed in the
hotplate Steve's struggled,
and he's only got through
it by the skin of his teeth.
Come on Steve, last table.
Fuckin' hell, right, Gareth!
Come in here, Danny, turn
off the stoves.
Right, how was that for you,
truthfully?
- Coulda been better.
Coulda been better.
Coulda been more smoother,
more communication.
- Yeah, who can that
communication come from, Steve?
- Me.
- Hallelujah.
It's been a bloody hard week
but I think we've
shown the staff
that the old Gondola has
life in her yet.
Fucking hell, £2,000
in one night,
the restaurant alone
last week took 500 quid.
Now, there's the insight to
what this place is capable
of doing and it's only down to
one thing, what is it Steve?
Hard work, that's all,
hard work.
(peaceful music)
This kitchen was so far
behind the times
even I considered
throwing the towel in.
We struggled through a
birthday function
and then a business lunch.
But the dinner dance
showed how La Gondola
can get the good times back.
I've implemented a new menu
and a new ethos in the kitchen,
but can they really build
on the momentum
when I'm not there to
hold their hands?
Danny the apprentice does have
the makings of a good chef.
You've seen over the week that
you can cook the staff food.
It's a really nice thing
for you to do once a day?
- I said to them the other
day, I said I want to cook,
I don't wanna be like
stuck on the pots and that.
- [Gordon] No, you're too
good for that.
Gareth also has a chance of
making it, if he knuckles down.
- You've learnt me more stuff
than he has in three years.
- There's someone deep
down inside there
that's tucked away that's
dying to learn,
that wants to come out.
So fucking get it out.
But Steve still worries me.
I think you've fucking
forgotten the word cooking,
passion, exciting.
- Yeah I have,
you're damn right.
It's been switched off
for a long time.
It's all been rusted up
and this week's loosened enough,
it's just gonna keep on
loosenin' up now I think.
I'm not gonna quit on it,
I'm going to give it my
fucking best.
You see if I don't.
Come back.
- Fuck me, I'll be back.
- Yeah, you come back.
- Whether or not you'll
be here when I get back
will be a different matter.
(upbeat music)
Last summer I spent a week
at La Gondola in Derby,
my most testing
kitchen nightmare.
A restaurant 30 years
out of date.
It's like stepping back
in time in there.
- It is, and I wondered whether,
should we really decorate it
or wait 'til the fashion turns.
- No customers.
It has a shit reputation.
And one of the worst
Head Chefs I've ever met.
For a 51 year old chef to
produce that kind of shit,
I'm fucking gobsmacked.
But somehow I managed to get
the place swinging again.
Four months later I'm back.
At least someone's in
the gondola.
Who on earth is that in there,
God, okay.
How are you?
- Fine.
- Good.
Quick kiss, what's the matter?
- Well, I'd have done
my hair and got changed.
- You don't need to
do that for me.
Steve, he's obviously
getting ready for dinner.
- Steve left.
He walked out, he walked out,
gave me a week's notice
as soon as you left.
- The minute I left,
he walked out?
- He didn't have the
energy, thought about it
and he was out of here.
- [Gordon] Didn't
have the energy?
- I begged him to stay
but he said no his
mind was made up
so I think he's got a
job in a pub now.
- [Gordon] Job in a pub.
- Yes.
- Servin' what kind of food?
- Well, what the general
manager calls ding-ding food.
You put it in a microwave
and out it comes.
- Yeah, in a way I'm
not that upset,
because if he wasn't
prepared to pull on the rope
and actually help get
the place back.
Who's in there now,
who's the chef?
- Oh, you'll have to see.
This man saved my life.
- Hello Wayne, how are you?
- Hi, not to bad at all.
- Yeah, Gordon, nice
to see you, excellent.
So the style of menu,
what is the style of menu?
- Style of menu, I've
only arrived yesterday so.
- So we've had no.
Sorry, excuse me, you've
had no chef since?
- No, no, no.
I did experiment with at
least four other chefs.
I went through one who
was feng shui
who would only cook in a
certain style.
- Feng shui chef?
- [Daniella] Feng shui, yeah.
- Even Wayne's pissin' himself.
- Did research 'round because.
- [Gordon] It turns out
Daniella road tested
several head chefs
after Steve jumped ship.
At least she's trying not to
make the same mistake twice.
- Friday, we had about 20.
- But where's Gareth?
He still here?
- No, well, he finished
up yesterday.
- He's been poached by Steve
to go and work in a pub
when he can work here
but the money
was too much of a temptation,
I'm afraid.
- Yeah, that's shockin'.
I'm pissed off that Gareth
didn't stick it out,
but I think a clean slate
is the only way forward
for Daniella.
Yeah, and someone's trying to
constantly pullin' the wool
over this woman's eyes.
- Absolutely.
- And unfortunately
because she's so nice
and so gentle, everybody was
takin' the piss out of her
and was becoming a
laughing stock.
- Absolutely.
- Now she's got the
bull by the horns,
she's shook it,
and she's got rid of the
fucking cobwebs.
Please tell me Danny's here.
- He's workin' tonight.
- Okay.
And, Danny, have you missed me?
- [Danny] Yes I have.
- [Gordon] I've missed
you too as well,
you know that, big man.
- Yes big man.
(Gordon chuckles)
- Little fucker.
(upbeat music)
Danny's responded to my
encouragement
and taken up new
responsibilities.
- Danny, can ya get the
cream please, Danny!
- [Gordon] Perhaps he and
Wayne are the dynamic duo
that will give La
Gondola the stability
that it desperately needs.
- All right, the bottom shelf,
basil
in a package, yeah?
Quick as ya can please.
- [Gordon] But the proof's
in the tasting.
I'm having Wayne's
butternut squash soup,
I hope it's better than
Steve's packet minestrone.
A really nice colour and
it smells amazing, and.
It's nice.
It's not difficult to make,
a very simple,
homemade, rustic soup.
But it, you know, this speaks
volumes about a restaurant.
They've built on the
live music theme.
Martin's still got
his old magic,
and now he's flambéing main
courses as well as desserts.
Looks fantastic.
- Yep.
- You sound brilliant
and it smells amazing.
- [Martin] Yep, you
actually taste it.
- [Gordon] My very
own steak Diane.
The steak's nice and rare,
it tastes exactly how
it should be.
Very good.
Daniella's retained my
simpler, more contemporary menu
and they're cooking with
fresh ingredients
rather than opening a
tin or a packet.
And the takings have quadrupled
since I was last here.
That was lovely, and I'm
really pleased it was lovely.
And you've got the
simplest things right.
- Well, you've made me
feel very brave about it,
and I just needed someone
to open my eyes up
to what's dreams and
what's reality.
- Thank god she's woken up.
She thought she'd
bought success.
She'd bought a restaurant
full of baggage
and a chef that
didn't give a fuck.
Now she's got the basics right.
She moves forward, and this
place does have a chance
of survivin' for the
next 30 years,
providing they continue.
Good food, good service,
bit of atmosphere,
and enjoy what you're doing.
It's not difficult.
(upbeat music)
- This week I'm in Derby for
my biggest challenge yet,
a god awful Italian restaurant
that's stuck in a timewarp.
It sounds like prices
that were in existence
fucking 10, 15 years ago.
A truly miserable kitchen.
- I've been saying it
for three days,
we haven't got a pot washer,
nobody's done a fucking
thing about it.
- With appalling food.
The chicken's raw
and I don't wanna catch
salmonella in fucking Derby.
Unless I can help her,
new owner Daniella has
just spent half a million
quid on a sinking ship.
- Well, we might as well
close down now
and I can save my money.
(knife whooshing)
(upbeat music)
- [Gordon] When La Gondola
opened in 1968,
its Italian owners brought
the glamour of Venice
to dowdy Derby,
and it instantly became
the place to be seen.
- You couldn't get
into this place
unless you booked two or
three weeks in advance,
the place was packed.
It had wonderful atmosphere
and it had a reputation
of being the best
restaurant in Derby.
- Daniella celebrated
her 21st birthday
at La Gondola, she even got
married in the restaurant.
She loves it so much six months
ago she bought the company,
but just what has she bought?
(upbeat music)
Cor, fucking hell.
Marbella in Derby, fucking
hell, look at the size of it.
A 125 seater restaurant with
a 21 bedroom hotel attached,
a big undertaking, especially
if the state of the outside
is anything to go by.
Fuck me, even the
gondola looks fucked.
Hello.
- [Daniella] Hello,
good evening Mr. Ramsay.
- Gordon.
- Gordon.
- And?
- Daniella.
- Daniella, how are you?
- Fine.
- Good.
- All the better
for seeing you, thank you
for coming to our restaurant.
- Not at all.
God, it's a, it's like
going back in time.
- It is, it's a bit
of a time warp.
- [Gordon] And how old is it?
- Nearly 40 years old.
- Really?
Even the floorboards are.
- I know, creaky.
- Creaking as well, fantastic.
Anyone under there?
- No, there's the wine cellar
where I keep my lovely old wine.
- Oh, okay.
- So, yes,
so don't fall through it.
- Fantastic.
It's Friday night and
eight o'clock
and we can hear a few
clinking plates in there,
but the place sounds empty.
How many's booked for dinner?
- Four.
- [Gordon] Four?
- Yes, a table of four,
and that's all.
And that is our problem,
we have this
beautiful restaurant
and it's empty most of the time.
- One question I've got to ask,
why the hell did you buy it
if you've never run a
restaurant or a hotel before?
- Well, when my mother died
and I went through a divorce,
it was the one thing one
night that kept me going,
and I just thought
that's what I'll do,
I'll buy La Gondola.
And all night long I just
dreamt of this place.
- Oh, some customers
coming now outside.
Okay.
Good night.
- [Customer] Goodnight.
- Did you enjoy dinner?
- Yes thanks.
- Excellent.
Damn, I think they left
their teeth on the table.
From its 70s chandeliers
to its plastic flowers,
the restaurant
is well and truly past it.
(slow soothing jazzy music)
It's like stepping back
in time in there.
- It is, and I wondered whether
should we really decorate it
or wait 'til the fashion
turns and come back to it?
I mean.
- Gosh!
But it will be too late
if the business goes down
the pan first.
Everywhere you look,
it's like a
flashback to the 70s,
even the food sounds,
you know, that dated.
Smoked salmon, honeydew
melon with port,
warm brie with a tomato tart.
The menu is massive,
nearly 100 dishes,
and very few of them
actually Italian.
I'd like to start with the
spaghetti bolognese please.
- Spaghetti bolognese.
- Yeah, 'cause the
food's Italian.
- Yes.
- So it's fresh spaghetti?
- It is.
- Thank you.
I've ordered the simplest
starter on the menu,
but it seems to be
taking a very long time.
- Get him on some fucking
proper spaghetti now,
he's gonna get that fucking
ancient shit that was in there.
Gareth, Gareth, Gareth,
Gareth, you, you do it.
(upbeat music)
- I do apologise for the wait.
- Don't worry, problem
in the kitchen?
- That pasta's been freshly
cooked to order sir.
- Oh, lovely, nice.
Thank you.
He apologised about the wait
because, he said, the
pasta was cooked to order.
Which you've only got four
customers in the evening,
fucking right it's gonna
be cooked to order.
Big portions, for a starter.
At £6.50 it's huge.
A mountain of spag bol
and a salmon main course
to come, all for £6.50.
No wonder they're losing money.
- Right, Gareth, see if
you can get a little tin
of lobster soup open
without them seeing you.
- I've just seen
something very dodgy,
they're silver serving
the vegetables,
and even in 1999 silver
service on vegetables
like that was 25 years too late.
The salmon is also massive
and, like the restaurant,
a bewildering trip through time.
As the years have progressed,
they've just added more onto it.
Oh, fuck it, it's 1975, let's
stick a mussel on there.
Oh, fuck it, it's 1980,
let's stick some mange
tout on there.
Do you know what, it's
1985, ratatouille's in,
stick some ratatouille on there.
And it's 1990, welcome
back the roast spud.
Quantity not quality, a
classic 1970s mistake.
Surprise, surprise,
Head Chef Steve Strawn,
started here in 1975.
I've never seen such massive
portions in my entire life.
It doesn't need the prawns,
it doesn't need the mussels.
- It's described on
the menu as that
so I've gotta follow it through
with what's on the menu.
- But, I mean, you've been
here for that length of time,
you could change that
and just do a simple poached
salmon dish without all that.
- I could do, I could do, yeah.
- You know, there's two
ways in this industry,
you move with the times,
or the times moves you.
And, unfortunately, you've
been caught in a time warp.
(upbeat music)
In my experience, when a
restaurant's been stuck in a rut
for so long rot
starts setting in,
staff get really lazy,
they start cutting corners,
and I really need to discover
exactly what's going on here.
Today there's a 70th birthday
party in the restaurant.
Functions are the life
blood of La Gondola,
but there's not even enough
of those to stop it
dying on its arse.
- At the moment for this year
I've got nine weddings booked,
but really we should be aiming
for about 30 weddings a year
and then that would
be very nice.
- [Gordon] With 25 covers
it's a chance for me to see
how the kitchen copes
when they have more than
four people through the door.
- [Gareth] I've done
four of four.
- [Gareth] 10 minutes in, the
kitchen's already in trouble.
They've run out of
fresh tuna steaks.
- [Steve] You know what you're
going to have to do, plan B.
- Fuck knows what they're
gonna do, it's called plan B.
Do you know about plan B?
- Plan B?
- Plan B.
- Plan B, no.
- No?
- No I don't.
- What's plan B when
it's at home?
- [Gareth] Tins.
- Oh, tins, that's what
it means, right.
Tinned tuna banged out
on limp lettuce.
My gran would have been
ashamed to have served that.
It doesn't feel like a kitchen,
no energy, no excitement,
no passion really and sort
of care and love for food.
Just get it the bowl and
fuck off out of here.
Now there's a problem
with the mains.
- [Female Customer] Oh, sorry,
it's no sauce on the salmon.
- Oh, no sauce, all, all plain?
- All plain, yeah.
- Where does it say
plain on there?
So it doesn't.
Well, there's nothing I
can do about that.
- [Gordon] Steve's
straight on the phone
to Stella, the business manager.
- Yeah, but doesn't say
plain on the menu does it?
We never serve it plain.
Chef's wrong again,
never the office.
- Is it sorted?
- Not really.
Sort it out on Monday.
- [Stella] It would've
said lobster sauce
if you wanted lobster sauce.
- [Gordon] Stella cocked up
the order for the lobster sauce
but instead of rolling up
his sleeves up
and getting on with it,
Steve picks a fight.
- [Steve] Are you going
upstairs Stella?
- [Stella] Why?
- I just asked Daniella to come
wash some pots, that's all.
- Why, haven't we got
a pot washer?
- I've been saying it
for three days,
we haven't got a pot washer
and nobody's done a
fucking thing about it.
- [Stella] Well, you're in
charge of the kitchen Steve,
it's your department, you
should see Dan.
- You wash your
hands of it then.
- [Gordon] While they're
all bickering,
the waiters are still
serving the main course.
It's a shambles.
La Gondola wants to be
a high class restaurant
and yet they're slopping out
reheated catering rubbish.
Belgium apple pie.
What's Belgium about it?
Do you buy them in?
- [Steve] Yeah.
- [Gordon] Oh, okay, right.
- [Steve] Yeah, yeah.
- But from a chef to
chef's point of view,
you know damn well
an apple pie..
- Oh, yeah, exactly.
- We could do it with
our eyes closed.
- Yeah, yeah, exactly.
- So are you telling me
now that you're happier
to buy them in rather
than make them?
- At this moment, no.
I'm happier to make them myself,
but I don't have the staff
with the skills
or the time to do it.
- Oh, okay.
How long does it take
to make an apple pie?
- Half an hour, 40 minutes.
- [Gordon] Microwaving?
- [Steve] Yeah, yeah.
- What this guy needs
is a rocket up his arse.
Well, this is a fucking
doddle for you isn't it?
- Yep.
- It's not exactly ball
breaking here is it?
- Has been in the past
and it can be.
- No, stop going back,
talk today.
It's almost like we're paying
for your memories again.
- [Steve] No, no,
today is quiet.
- [Gordon] Right.
- Bring it back, I'll
still handle it.
- Fucking hell, okay.
Daniella sank half a
million quid
of her divorce settlement
into La Gondola,
but last year alone it
lost 75 grand.
If she doesn't open her eyes
to what's happening
in her kitchen,
she'll be left with nothing
but memories and debts.
Let's be brutally honest, you
fell in love with the place
and you grew up in it,
and you had your 21st birthday
party, had your wedding here,
and you have bought a
fucking time bomb.
I've never seen a
kitchen like that
that just has so little
atmosphere, no banter,
no communication, no
vibrant, let's get ready
for a great lunch.
It was turkey going in, cooked
the day before, reheated.
- I'm horrified that
we had that.
You're telling me a
discerning customer
cannot tell the difference.
- Yeah, but I think what
we've really got to pick up on
and wake up on is the
fact that your chef
can lose his self esteem
by serving that shit.
They've carved a very
comfortable
niche out for themselves
and they've made a really
comfortable bed to lie in,
and unfortunately you're
paying the price for that.
(knife whooshes)
I'm pretty pissed off,
you know that?
I'm not happy,
because what I saw
yesterday, across the board,
I thought was a
fucking disgrace.
(upbeat music)
La Gondola in Derby.
At first I thought this
restaurant's problem was
that it was stuck in
a time warp,
but it goes far
deeper than that.
(upbeat music)
It's 10 o'clock and Head Chef,
Steve,
and his number two, Gareth,
are only just rolling
up for work.
You wouldn't get away
with that in my kitchen,
especially as last year the
restaurant lost 75 grand.
These guys just don't
seem to be interested
in turning the place around.
How much has the restaurant
taken this week, barely.
- Yeah.
- 500 quid, yeah?
The salaries alone in the
kitchen are 1000 pounds.
If the restaurant didn't
have these functions
that are drip feeding
into this establishment.
You wouldn't have a job.
I personally want to
put a fucking rocket up
everyone's arse in here today
to really make them understand
what you should be doing
and not bickering
and festering on fucking
memories from 20 years ago.
That means fuck all.
(slow jazzy music)
It's Sunday lunchtime
and there are three
diners at La Gondola.
When there isn't a function on,
well, nothing much
happens in this kitchen.
- Right, we are away?
- We're away.
Chef's away as well, he's been
away for 30 fucking years.
Mains away chef please.
- Not quite ready yet.
Not quite ready.
- [Gordon] This kitchen
is like a retirement home.
So how many evenings do
you work a week?
- [Gareth] Three.
- [Steve] Three to four,
depends on the business really,
you know, just play it by ear.
It varies.
- Yeah, what a bizarre set-up.
Good afternoon.
- [Customers] Good afternoon.
- Welcome back.
- [Female Customer] Thank you.
- Now, you've been coming for?
- [Female Customer] 36 years.
- [Gordon] 36 years?
- Yes.
- [Male Customer] Yes.
- [Gordon] Wow, amazing.
So you are the asset?
- [Female Customer] Yes.
- So, if the food was to
change you wouldn't come back?
- [Female Customer] No.
- [Gordon] No.
What have you got?
You've got Minestrone soup.
- [Male Customer]
Minestrone soup.
- [Female Customer] Yes.
- [Gordon] But La
Gondola are goin have
to risk losing their
three regular diners
because this is a
terrible environment
for an aspiring young chef.
Number two, Gareth, is only
19 but he's already given up.
It must be soul destroying
when the business is so quiet,
no?
Motivation-wise, no?
- [Gareth] It's boring.
- [Gordon] Yeah, very boring.
- When it's quiet you're just,
like,
clock watching until it's
10 o'clock so you can go,
because you can't go early
in case someone does come.
- [Gordon] No.
- So it's just,
you're just clock
watching all the time and.
- [Gordon] Yeah.
I've only seen one person
in this kitchen
with any real drive or ambition,
and that's 17 year old
apprentice Danny Holborn.
Are you alright Danny boy?
You're doing a fucking good job.
- Yeah, yeah, my pleasure.
- That's where it all
started, you know that?
I've been in there.
Lonely place in amongst
all those bubbles.
But, trust me, if you get
your shit together there
it goes from bubbles on
top of the sink
to bubbles in glasses
of champagne.
Would you like a glass
of champagne?
- I'm not old enough.
- Fuck it, we'll sneak it
in the fridge.
- [Danny] Okay then.
- Yeah?
- [Danny] Yeah.
- [Gordon] Young chefs
need encouragement,
but discipline is high on
Steve's list of priorities.
- [Steve] I don't stand
any nonsense.
- [Gordon] You don't
stand any nonsense?
- No, and if these don't
make it they go.
I've told them all.
Out, I'm not standing
for nothing.
This one might not
last the week.
- [Gordon] Oh, really?
What for?
- Yesterday, yesterday
was very close.
I don't hang around with one
warning and two warnings.
- [Gordon] No?
- They're out the fucking back
door mate, simple as that.
- So what you're saying
is you're worse than me?
- No, what I'm saying
is I don't like shit.
- Yeah.
- [Steve] Out they go,
isn't that right Gareth?
If you're no good you walk.
- Steve thinks he can
talk the talk,
but can he really walk the walk?
It's time I checked
out his store cupboard.
Cor, fucking hell.
Fucking evidence.
So, I mean, it looks like
fish food doesn't it, huh?
And it smells
fucking disgusting.
There you go, half a container
of plastic Minestrone soup.
Right.
Now, we've seen it all, Smash.
What in the fuck a chef
does with that I don't know.
The new owner Daniella
wants La Gondola
to be an authentic
Italian restaurant,
and yet she's completely unaware
of what's happening in
her own kitchen.
The minestrone soup is
quite a hallmark.
- It is, it's very good,
it's excellent,
almost as good as my mother's.
Yeah, it's great.
- Why do you buy it in Steve?
- I don't buy it in.
I make it myself.
- So the containers of
bought in minestrone soup
and the invoices here.
- What we do, we'd
mix that 50/50.
We'll sort of give half
and half really.
It, it seems to be.
- [Gordon] I'm not clear,
what do you mean, two bowls,
one of plastic and one?
- No, no, no, no, no, no.
We'd make half up
with part packet
and then put fresh
into it as well.
- [Gordon] Steve's penny
pinching by bulking up
the fresh soup with powdered,
but the prices are so
out of date on the menu,
they're haemorrhaging
money on a daily basis.
The cost of the lamb, nothing
more, just the lamb cutlets.
- [Steve] Yeah.
- That whole dish, okay, should
be on the menu at £16.50.
- [Steve] Right.
- You're selling it at £10.90.
And the scary thing is, Steve,
that you don't know that
every time we sell that lamb.
- [Steve] Yeah.
- We're losing five quid.
- [Steve] Yeah, yeah.
- And if we had a table
of four in today
and they walked in that door,
I swear to god it would
be a lot easier
to fucking stop them at the door
and say there's your £5
and fuck off.
- Well, we might as well
close down now
and I can save my money.
You know, I'm guided by people
who've been here for years
and they're telling me they can
make money out of that menu.
- But you were here in place,
in position as the manager
when this was put
together, sorry, I'm sorry.
- [Daniella] Ah, yeah, so you
can blame me all you like,
but it's my money Steve,
not yours.
- Yes I know, yes I know
it's your money.
Let's carry on, let's
put a structure in place.
- [Gareth] What about
your daughter's party?
- Just a minute, just a minute.
Let's put a structure.
- £10 per room, £10 per meal.
Where was the money,
where, where was the money?
- Listen, it's my restaurant,
and all I needed to do
was cover costs, all right?
- Where was the money on that?
- And I did more than
cover costs on that.
- It's Stella who does all this,
not us.
Stella does this.
- Don't go off saying
this that and the other.
You could be out of a
job in a month's time.
- No one is taking
responsibility
for La Gondola's problems,
everyone just blames each other.
I look at you and I get
really nervous,
because I think you're
the kind of cook
that's just gonna fuck off
out of here, you know that?
I think you're going to
get upset one day,
after listening to the way
you spoke to the owner,
if that was me I would
have sacked you,
and my worry is you're
so determined
to fucking work in
this industry,
you need to get excited, you
need to start cooking properly.
I've got to get these guys
out of this god awful kitchen
and try and lift their morale,
so I'm taking them to see one
of Derby's most
successful businesses.
Yeah, Gareth, you drive.
We're gonna look at
some history.
Right, let's go and look at
something that's beautiful,
something that's
moved with time.
A Rolls Royce, 1933.
Look at it, beautiful.
Now, the next one is
something quite interesting
because this was made in 1979.
Look at it, a bit of history.
Rolls Royce didn't sit still,
yeah,
and get moved by the times,
they decided to move ahead
of the times, the Phantom.
What's it like in there Danny?
- [Danny] It's nice and comfy.
- Nice and comfy?
- It looks like I mean business.
- Steve, see what I'm
trying to say?
They've moved on.
They haven't just stood
there and sort
of expected Rolls Royce to sell.
And, unfortunately, big boy,
when I first saw your food,
I felt like I was stepping
in a time capsule.
- Yeah, I get your point,
it's marvellous,
it's marvellous, absolutely.
- I know a chef who's got
one of these, you know that?
And you're thinking,
Gareth, what shall I do,
rob a bank or work hard?
- Rob a bank.
- Rob a bank?
Fucking hell, bollocks.
Shall we nip round and see
your mum Danny?
The engine that powers
any successful restaurant
is its kitchen, and
like Rolls Royce,
La Gondola is gonna have to
create its own modern classics.
I'm starting with
the lunch menu.
What's the secret behind
any good Italian restaurant?
- Pasta.
- [Gordon] Pasta, exactly.
When was the last time
you made fresh pasta?
- Never have.
- Here we go, you're making it,
I'm just gonna tell you
how to make it.
So make a well in the centre.
I'm keeping it simple so
the chefs have got time
to get up to speed.
Out goes the old two course
lunch menu for £6.50,
in comes a fresh pasta
main with a salad
and a glass of wine for £8.95.
See the colour is
starting to change now
because the saffron's
working on that.
Fresh pasta is the hallmark
of an authentic
Italian restaurant,
its simplicity also
makes it a money-spinner.
Far cheaper than those
expensive lamb specials.
See the colour of it, all of it?
Ricotta in?
And I want you to taste
it as you're doing it.
Now, okay, watch.
Yeah, like a parcel, exactly,
look.
Fold it over, nip all
the air out.
Little finger, over, left
to right, right to left,
use your thumb and push.
Tortellini, who'd like a go?
Yeah, of course you can
have a go, here we go.
We've only been making
pasta for 10 minutes
and already the young chefs look
like they're
enjoying themselves.
I've finally injected some
passion into this kitchen.
Good.
And that you've just done,
that was 10 minutes ago,
that was your first one.
Yeah, hey, no, but
that's your first,
you've never made pasta
and now you've made your
first ever Tortellini.
That's very good.
I've asked Danny,
the apprentice,
to come up with a couple
of salads for the new menu.
- Right, what I've
done is I've put,
like, tomato and that in
the mixing bowl.
- Good.
- And then with the shallots
and then you put like this,
like the salt and vinegar
stuff over it.
- [Gordon] Good.
- And I've already mixed.
- [Gordon] Okay, have a
little taste, eat with me.
And this one is a?
- It is rocket and
Parmesan cheese.
- That's lovely.
But La Gondola's problems
aren't just in the kitchen.
To help me re-launch
this sinking ship,
I've called in the boss
of the company
that does all my restaurant PR,
Jo Barnes.
What do you reckon?
- Well, it certainly
makes a first impression.
- [Gordon] Up the creaky stairs.
- Wow.
- Hi Dan.
- Hello.
- Amazing chandelier.
- And look at the dance floor
and just how many heels
have been dancing on this.
- [Jo] And you can kind of
see El Becko doing a special.
- [Gordon] Yeah.
- On, you know, interiors
frozen in time.
- Yeah.
Yeah, and do you think
there's a sellable asset here?
Do you think you could
sell this restaurant?
My first feelings
when I come in,
and I don't mean to be negative,
are start all over again.
This place badly needs
refurbishment.
You could refurb it, you
could call it a new name
and start over and
really re-launch it.
However, being real.
- [Gordon] They haven't
got the money.
- Fine.
- [Gordon] No.
- What it does have is a
tremendous amount
of authenticity and
kind of kitschy appeal.
- Yeah.
- And I love the sort of,
you know, the Doric columns
and the dance floor, and I
suppose you've gotta work
with what you've got.
- [Gordon] Daniella and
her business manager Stella
need Jo's help, because so
far their marketing efforts
have hardly set Derby alight.
- I can't even find it on here.
- [Daniella] It's supposed to be
under restaurants,
under continental.
- [Gordon] Oh, there we go.
Jesus Christ!
So we go past all these
relaxing massage
and all these whore houses
and you come down here
and then you get
"La Gondola, try our new menus.
"Bookings now being taken."
I mean, you know,
you've missed it.
- I think what you've
got to do is identify
what your real
strengths are here,
and that's the family
run business,
that's the great space you've
got with the dance floor,
and make them into
selling points.
You've got to have a
punchy message
with which you can appeal
to your potential customers.
- Now the restaurant
reputation's disappeared,
yet you've got.
- The reputation hasn't
disappeared, the problem is
that people have forgotten
about La Gondola.
It hasn't got a bad
reputation, definitely not.
Nine times.
- [Gordon] So this is a
good reputation?
See, again, you're
living in the past.
- Medium, medium.
- I feel you're not being
honest with yourself.
It has a shit reputation.
- [Stella] It hasn't.
- [Gordon] I'm
telling you it has.
- So you've been to Derby
and you've had a word
with all of the customers?
- [Gordon] Yeah, no,
hold on a minute.
- And none of them are happy?
- All of the customers?
There are no customers,
the place is empty.
- So you're telling me
that the people
who put adverts in the
paper thanking us
for a superb wedding, etcetera.
- [Gordon] You're
missing my point.
- None of them are happy?
- If you just listen to
what I'm trying to tell you,
it may make sense in a minute.
The add-ons
from having a successful
restaurant is phenomenal.
We haven't got that
reputation any longer.
The business is on its arse,
and the functions over the
last 10 years have depleted.
Accept it, there is no
reputation at La Gondola.
And if you're going
to stand there
and tell me it's a good place
when the chef buys in
minestrone soup
No chance.
(upbeat music)
We need to spread the
word around Derby
that La Gondola is changing.
So I've told Stella to
get on the phone
and round up members of the
city's business community
for a special lunch.
A great way to get
the message out
and a chance to see if
Steve can lead his team.
- My father used to come
here for business lunches
about 25 years ago, right.
But in recent times I have
to say it's not a place
that I would have come to.
- The idea of this lunch today
is to get them in and out
in 45 minutes.
We've banished silver service
to speed up the waiters,
but can Steve run his kitchen
fast enough to keep up?
- Whether we're busy, quiet,
makes no difference to me.
I only know one way and
that's the way I do it.
- Yeah, are you ready
to roll with this, yeah?
- Yeah.
- Good man.
This is the exciting
part of the day, yeah?
Okay, let's see, I want you
to clean round the plates.
- Yeah.
- Be a good boy, let's go.
- One fritatta, one
bruchetta, one Tagliatelle.
- [Gordon] Nice.
The new pasta dishes I've
devised are hitting the spot.
- Table three sends
their compliments.
- That's a first.
- Quality, yeah, not bad.
Very good price as well, but
a little bit slow coming out,
just a little bit slow
when people are having a
business lunch.
- But, once again,
the lack of organisation has
dropped the kitchen in it.
Jesus Chris.
Come on guys there's
gotta be a system
in here somewhere.
Steve?
If you're confused, yeah,
let me know
and I'll help you out, yeah?
- [Steve] Okay.
- 'Cause it's gone all quiet,
you see?
You're not leading like a
head chef, do you understand?
Where all these three
guys, including Danny,
is coming together at
the same time.
But they've gotta take your
direction, you know that?
- [Steve] Yes.
- Outside in the restaurant
there are lots of
customers waiting,
but all the orders have
become mixed up.
You sent table four, yeah?
Three Tagliatelle,, one
gnocchi, one Bruchetta.
- [Steve] Yeah.
- They've sent them,
they've just come back,
they're on coffee, you've
already sent their main course.
And now a whole table
has got the wrong dishes.
Start again, anyway, it's
gone stone cold.
What about the starters
on table eight?
- They've had it already.
- They've had them?
Why is it not crossed off Steve?
Fucking, no wonder the
kitchen's confused.
Its so important that.
If you've sent the starters
why aren't you crossing it off?
- Right, table two for
starters, yeah, this is.
- [Gordon] That was
just 35 covers.
I'm planning to completely
re-launch the restaurant
in only a couple of days' time
with double the number
of customers.
I'm starting to wonder if
Steve really is up to it.
What has come out of
today's lunch,
you know that, is how everyone
just works on their own,
you know that?
- [Steve] Yeah.
- I've seen no fucking team
spirit here whatsoever.
- [Steve] No, no.
- No understanding, no
co-ordination
and bringing these guys together
has been a fucking nightmare.
- [Steve] I know.
- Fucking hell, I tell
you, I'm finding it hard,
I'm finding it really
fucking hard.
Because it's not about
teaching an old boy new tricks,
it's about getting the
old boy to wake up
and stop being a lazy bastard.
A simple risotto, bruschetta,
fritatta, tagliatelle
of chicken and they're
still in the shit.
La Gondola is up the
creek without a paddle.
The kitchen's getting by
with bought-in apple pies,
and the staff don't
pull together.
- I never know which way
you have it you poof.
- [Gordon] In less
than 48 hours,
new owner Daniella is
re-launching the restaurant.
- I woke up at five
o'clock this morning.
Don't often swear, but I
was shit scared.
- [Gordon] The trouble
is Daniella's Head Chef
has been treading water,
opening a tin of tuna
or a packet of powdered soup.
I want to redesign the
menu for the re-launch,
but what can Steve
actually cook?
I've asked him to prepare me
a dish fresh ingredients only.
So, what's in there, butter?
- [Steve] We've got butter.
- Red onions.
- [Steve] Red onions, a
little bit of olive oil.
- Yeah.
- Fennel, fresh fennel,
and just a little bit
of orange zest.
Flour.
- And where did this
idea come from?
- When I was a commis we
used to do it,
when I worked down in Oxford.
- [Gordon] So 35 years ago?
- [Steve] Quite a long time,
yeah, yeah.
- [Gordon] Steve is
cooking me a dish
of rustic Italian trout.
- That smells gorgeous.
And then we can dress it up.
- I was a little bit miffed
when you were frying the trout,
the fact you hadn't taken
the scales off.
- [Steve] Right.
- So when I've got to eat this
with a pile of shit in my mouth.
Why didn't you scale the fish?
- [Steve] Sorry, just
time it was.
- Time?
- [Steve] Yeah.
- It looks like you forgot.
I think that's pretty dismal,
for a 51 year old chef
to produce that pile of
shit I'm fucking gobsmacked.
The scales are on there, it's
all on the roof of my mouth,
the fucking alcohol's
not burnt off,
it's, fucking hell Steve.
After Steve's dismal effort,
I want to find out if the
other chefs can do any better.
Tuna's very tasty.
You don't need that sauce.
For me, you've just
fucked that dish
by putting that glue on there.
That sort of gallopy,
stodgy wallpaper paste that,
in fact I'd offer
that to Daniella
to fucking plaster the front
of La Gondola, you know that,
'cause that looks like a
pile of shit there as well.
What's that, what's
that in there?
- [Chef] Inside?
- [Gordon] Yeah.
Oh, the, the chicken's inside?
- [Chef] Yeah.
- Is this a Polish dish?
- No, no.
- [Gordon] The chicken's raw.
- [Chef] Raw.
- Now unfortunately I
can't afford
to fuck off and die right now,
and I don't want to catch
Salmonella in fucking Derby,
so put that straight in the bin,
yeah?
I've been poisoned once before
and it's not gonna
fucking happen again.
It's so scary, we really
are in trouble here.
I've never sent this message
out before in a restaurant,
I'd tell them fucking move
your arse, get on with it,
otherwise you're out.
But I'm gonna tell you
guys to stop and give up,
don't fight it if you
don't want to change.
And when that change comes in,
be prepared to work
fucking hard.
We've got to get rid of
all this crap.
We can't carry 80, 89 dishes.
What's it like when this
man's off for the night
and you've got 25 booked?
It must be mad, no?
When you cook like that
do you actually think
that you're fit enough
to call yourself a chef
if you're defrosting things
and deep frying mushrooms?
- No.
- And is it important
for you to cook
or are you really
seriously interested
in staying the way you are?
- [Gareth] Cook.
- You are, you, you
definitely wanna cook?
Yeah, away.
There's nothing complicated
in a this, you know that?
The only option is to
go right back to basics.
I've devised a new dinner menu
that's so simple hopefully
it's foolproof.
A light gnocchi with
salmon and tarragon.
And a simple tomato
and mozzarella risotto.
That tomato it's just
a little bit too thick.
- [Steve] Too thick, yeah.
- Even this kitchen surely
can't cock these dishes up.
Fresh fragrant mix, stand
up please Steve.
Thank you.
Gareth, it's really hard
for you to understand at 19
how modern we're trying
to put the approach.
- [Gareth] Sure.
- [Gordon] Yeah?
Nothing's coming out of a
fucking packet,
nothing's coming out underneath,
cooked fucking three days ago,
it's just clean, fresh,
and just think back to
that Phantom, that Roller.
Is it worth getting out
of bed in the morning?
- Yeah.
- [Gordon] Yes,
fucking right it is.
Real easy, okay, yeah.
So it doesn't all stick.
Danny's never been given
his own section,
so I'm going to see how he
does with the vegetables.
You've got to look after
them, you know that,
almost as if you're sort
of in love with them.
- [Danny] Yes Gordon.
- [Gordon] Well, beautiful
- [Danny] It's warm ain't it?
- It's very warm isn't it?
Huh, welcome to the real
world of the kitchen big boy,
you're sweating.
- Yeah.
- That looks cool.
- First time.
- Is it the first time
you've sweated?
- In the kitchen, yeah.
- Good man.
Yeah, so have you done
the peppers, yeah?
The aubergine?
The butternut squash?
- Yes.
- And now, all of a sudden,
big boy,
over the last couple of hours,
yes,
you've been running the
vegetable section.
Move your arse.
We now have a new contemporary
menu for the re-launch.
Time to chuck out the chintz.
Stella, let me ask
you something.
You're sat, just come
and touch this a minute
and close your eyes and
just touch it.
- [Stella] Close my
eyes and touch it?
- Yeah.
- Horrible.
- Fucking disgusting.
Dirty, grubby, smelly,
plastic flowers, yeah?
The clutter on the tables,
Martin,
looks like it's come out
of the fucking pound shop.
You know, you're like an
old fucking woman
that just won't throw
anything away.
Get rid of it.
- [Martin] It's going tonight.
- Good.
It's like going to a, an
airport lounge
and looking at one of the
chapels of rest.
It's the kind of thing
you'd see in there
when you sort of sit
down and grieve.
I mean, I'm sorry, but
they are fucking awful.
Catch, get hold of them all
and lob them in the skip, yeah?
- Pleasure.
- Good man.
Already, I feel like,
fucking hell,
I've got rid of my granny's
pants, they're off,
they're no longer up here,
I'm starting to think about
wearing a nice sexy pair
of knickers, because
I've just seen
the white tablecloth go down.
That's how I feel in here.
- It looks clean and fresh.
- [Gordon] Yeah, would you wear
knickers up to there Stella?
- Oh, don't start Gordon.
Stick to the restaurant.
- [Gordon] I'm just asking.
Would you wear a pair of
woolly knickers up to here?
- No, no, I wouldn't.
- [Gordon] No, so get rid
of the flowers.
But I have discovered one thing
from the past worth
hanging onto.
- This is from the old
classic menu we used to have.
Yeah.
- [Gordon] All done
on the table?
- [Martin] All done
on the table.
- And now you've stopped it
because it's on the old menu?
- Yeah, I mean, at one
time Saturday nights used
to be just one person just
do the cooking all night.
- So you're taking that
to, what, lightly brown?
- Just nice and golden brown.
- I've asked Martin for a demo
because I think that
flambés are due a comeback.
Jesus Christ!
Do you miss this?
- Oh, yeah.
- [Gordon] You're so
fucking good at it.
- Yes, I hope so.
I try and do my best anyway.
- This should be the hallmark
of the restaurant this.
This is this is art.
Thank you.
- [Martin] My pleasure.
- Christ almighty!
If they taste as good
as they look,
they're going back on the menu.
They're to die for.
They are fucking delicious.
Who needs a wine list
when you can get pissed
on the dessert?
It's the day of the re-launch.
As well as bringing
back the flambés,
I've decided to resurrect
La Gondola's dance floor.
A house band is booked
and the waiting staff
finally look the part.
There will be 70
covers in tonight,
double the number of diners
that we had in for the
business lunch.
It's a real test for
the kitchen,
they're really gonna have
to pull together
if they want to carry it off.
I've put Danny in charge
of the staff dinner.
They don't normally
have them here
but they're a great way
to build team spirit.
The most important thing
about staff dinner, big boy,
is clearing out the fridge, yes?
So we've got to move now,
big boy,
we've got 10 minutes
to get this ready, yes?
Steve, I think he could really
take his own little sort
of world there doing these
staff lunches and that,
you know that, and
it'll give him
that little vote of confidence.
- [Steve] Yeah, why not?
- Unfortunately, Steve
doesn't seem very confident.
With only an hour until the
first guests arrive I'm worried.
You're running round
getting all your plates
and bits and bobs,
but I saw that a week
ago, you're all boxed off.
- No, I was intending to
go round in the morning
and just make sure everybody
knows what's going on tonight
and what I need, and
when I show up for it,
what I want when I want it.
- Yeah, but it's all very
well, it's in your mind,
but the problem is that,
you know.
- Yeah, like I'm saying,
I'm gonna talk to them now.
- It's sort of, you know.
- Yeah.
- Offloading it and getting
them to understand, yeah?
- Yeah, sure.
There's a feeling there
but I'm not sure if
it's nervousness or not.
I get stressed as much
as anybody else,
I'm only, I'm only human, so.
Maybe I get stressed more than
anybody else, I don't know.
- Oh, the risotto's gorgeous.
Congratulations Daniel,
that's really good.
- [Gordon] Steve,
you're not eating?
- [Steve] Well, I've had
two meals since last Friday.
- [Gordon] You've had two
meals since last Friday?
- [Steve] Yeah, I'm just
off it at the moment.
- Thank you.
I'm really worried about
Steve, he seems very nervous.
The menus we've got, yeah?
Everything is in place
and ready to roll,
but at the last minute
Steve bottles it.
Right, listen.
I'm running the
hotplate tonight.
I shouldn't really be
running the hotplate,
but Steve's asked if I'd
run the hotplate
to make sure that we
get up to speed, yeah?
Communication, chemistry,
understanding, yeah?
Working for each other, yeah?
Gareth, yeah, what are
we going to do tonight
if we get flustered
and frustrated,
what are you going to do?
- Ask for help.
- [Gordon] Yeah, and
take it out on your what?
- Pasta.
- That's right, you take it out
on your pasta, not Daniella.
Enjoy it, smile, I'll be behind
you every ounce of the way.
Smile.
Order on.
One tortellini, one parma
ham with figs,
one antipasto, one linguini.
Main course, one gnocchi, one
tuna, one salmon, one lamb.
Not one fucking answer.
Yes chef.
- Yes chef.
- [Gordon] Thank you, good boy.
I shouldn't be doing this.
Steve needs to be able to run
his kitchen properly himself,
so I'm only gonna get
him started.
So two minutes on the
hotplate, one gnocchi,
one tuna, one salmon, one lamb.
Steve, tomorrow
you're on your own,
and I just wish that
you implemented a system
like this 10 years ago,
big boy, you know that?
- [Steve] I do.
- So it wouldn't be so fucking
hard now at the age of 51.
- [Steve] Yeah.
- Thank you, 14, go.
Right, Gareth, watch the cooking
on the pasta please, yes?
Next time I'm gonna be
down on your bollocks.
Two lamb, one rib-eye, one tuna.
- Yes chef.
- Yeah, nicely, put it
on that plate nicely,
as if you're in love with it,
yeah?
Fresh tarragon on the top.
Come on.
How does it feel to be
cooking normally?
No, no, no.
- Different, different.
- [Gordon] Yeah, no, no,
no, no, I didn't ask that.
- It's exciting.
Once we get in the system
it'll be good.
- [Gordon] Yeah, it's the
only way Steve.
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
I can stay here and run this,
but you're fucking
benefiting jack shit mate.
- [Steve] True enough.
- Yeah, you're gonna have
to do it yourself now,
you know that?
- [Steve] Yeah.
- Run your kitchen, and
run your team.
- Yes chef.
- Okay, and if I hear you silent
and not talking to them, yeah?
Hey, I'm gonna ram that
fork up your ass.
- Nice, it's a big one.
- Yeah.
Fuckin' right.
(upbeat music)
For the first time in 15 years,
Martin's back cooking up
a storm with the flambé.
Good music, efficient and
stylish table service,
at last La Gondola is
swinging again.
- Three lamb, two rib-eyes,
one tuna.
Hannah, can you send
Joanna in please.
Don't understand what
all these arrows mean.
- So, two medium, one well done.
- That's a medium is it?
- Your first main course
is three lamb.
They haven't even started
clearing the starters yet, okay?
Thank you.
(upbeat music)
As the atmosphere in
the restaurant hots up,
the kitchen is going
into slow motion.
No.
Cross it off.
What about that other
table of four here?
Two rib-eye, one tuna,
one salmon.
- Okay.
- [Gordon] You've gone
all quiet again.
- Where's that salad, ready?
Right, tuna.
- [Gordon] When the kitchen
does get the food out,
it's going down a treat.
I've never seen a lady
clean her plate so quickly
in my life.
It's like taking a portable
dishwasher out for dinner.
- It's been beautiful, really,
really nice
to enjoy authentic Italian
cooking, very nice.
- If they, if they stand
up to the reputation
that they've set tonight
we'll come back.
(upbeat music)
- The new menu has
been a success,
but since I handed in the
hotplate Steve's struggled,
and he's only got through
it by the skin of his teeth.
Come on Steve, last table.
Fuckin' hell, right, Gareth!
Come in here, Danny, turn
off the stoves.
Right, how was that for you,
truthfully?
- Coulda been better.
Coulda been better.
Coulda been more smoother,
more communication.
- Yeah, who can that
communication come from, Steve?
- Me.
- Hallelujah.
It's been a bloody hard week
but I think we've
shown the staff
that the old Gondola has
life in her yet.
Fucking hell, £2,000
in one night,
the restaurant alone
last week took 500 quid.
Now, there's the insight to
what this place is capable
of doing and it's only down to
one thing, what is it Steve?
Hard work, that's all,
hard work.
(peaceful music)
This kitchen was so far
behind the times
even I considered
throwing the towel in.
We struggled through a
birthday function
and then a business lunch.
But the dinner dance
showed how La Gondola
can get the good times back.
I've implemented a new menu
and a new ethos in the kitchen,
but can they really build
on the momentum
when I'm not there to
hold their hands?
Danny the apprentice does have
the makings of a good chef.
You've seen over the week that
you can cook the staff food.
It's a really nice thing
for you to do once a day?
- I said to them the other
day, I said I want to cook,
I don't wanna be like
stuck on the pots and that.
- [Gordon] No, you're too
good for that.
Gareth also has a chance of
making it, if he knuckles down.
- You've learnt me more stuff
than he has in three years.
- There's someone deep
down inside there
that's tucked away that's
dying to learn,
that wants to come out.
So fucking get it out.
But Steve still worries me.
I think you've fucking
forgotten the word cooking,
passion, exciting.
- Yeah I have,
you're damn right.
It's been switched off
for a long time.
It's all been rusted up
and this week's loosened enough,
it's just gonna keep on
loosenin' up now I think.
I'm not gonna quit on it,
I'm going to give it my
fucking best.
You see if I don't.
Come back.
- Fuck me, I'll be back.
- Yeah, you come back.
- Whether or not you'll
be here when I get back
will be a different matter.
(upbeat music)
Last summer I spent a week
at La Gondola in Derby,
my most testing
kitchen nightmare.
A restaurant 30 years
out of date.
It's like stepping back
in time in there.
- It is, and I wondered whether,
should we really decorate it
or wait 'til the fashion turns.
- No customers.
It has a shit reputation.
And one of the worst
Head Chefs I've ever met.
For a 51 year old chef to
produce that kind of shit,
I'm fucking gobsmacked.
But somehow I managed to get
the place swinging again.
Four months later I'm back.
At least someone's in
the gondola.
Who on earth is that in there,
God, okay.
How are you?
- Fine.
- Good.
Quick kiss, what's the matter?
- Well, I'd have done
my hair and got changed.
- You don't need to
do that for me.
Steve, he's obviously
getting ready for dinner.
- Steve left.
He walked out, he walked out,
gave me a week's notice
as soon as you left.
- The minute I left,
he walked out?
- He didn't have the
energy, thought about it
and he was out of here.
- [Gordon] Didn't
have the energy?
- I begged him to stay
but he said no his
mind was made up
so I think he's got a
job in a pub now.
- [Gordon] Job in a pub.
- Yes.
- Servin' what kind of food?
- Well, what the general
manager calls ding-ding food.
You put it in a microwave
and out it comes.
- Yeah, in a way I'm
not that upset,
because if he wasn't
prepared to pull on the rope
and actually help get
the place back.
Who's in there now,
who's the chef?
- Oh, you'll have to see.
This man saved my life.
- Hello Wayne, how are you?
- Hi, not to bad at all.
- Yeah, Gordon, nice
to see you, excellent.
So the style of menu,
what is the style of menu?
- Style of menu, I've
only arrived yesterday so.
- So we've had no.
Sorry, excuse me, you've
had no chef since?
- No, no, no.
I did experiment with at
least four other chefs.
I went through one who
was feng shui
who would only cook in a
certain style.
- Feng shui chef?
- [Daniella] Feng shui, yeah.
- Even Wayne's pissin' himself.
- Did research 'round because.
- [Gordon] It turns out
Daniella road tested
several head chefs
after Steve jumped ship.
At least she's trying not to
make the same mistake twice.
- Friday, we had about 20.
- But where's Gareth?
He still here?
- No, well, he finished
up yesterday.
- He's been poached by Steve
to go and work in a pub
when he can work here
but the money
was too much of a temptation,
I'm afraid.
- Yeah, that's shockin'.
I'm pissed off that Gareth
didn't stick it out,
but I think a clean slate
is the only way forward
for Daniella.
Yeah, and someone's trying to
constantly pullin' the wool
over this woman's eyes.
- Absolutely.
- And unfortunately
because she's so nice
and so gentle, everybody was
takin' the piss out of her
and was becoming a
laughing stock.
- Absolutely.
- Now she's got the
bull by the horns,
she's shook it,
and she's got rid of the
fucking cobwebs.
Please tell me Danny's here.
- He's workin' tonight.
- Okay.
And, Danny, have you missed me?
- [Danny] Yes I have.
- [Gordon] I've missed
you too as well,
you know that, big man.
- Yes big man.
(Gordon chuckles)
- Little fucker.
(upbeat music)
Danny's responded to my
encouragement
and taken up new
responsibilities.
- Danny, can ya get the
cream please, Danny!
- [Gordon] Perhaps he and
Wayne are the dynamic duo
that will give La
Gondola the stability
that it desperately needs.
- All right, the bottom shelf,
basil
in a package, yeah?
Quick as ya can please.
- [Gordon] But the proof's
in the tasting.
I'm having Wayne's
butternut squash soup,
I hope it's better than
Steve's packet minestrone.
A really nice colour and
it smells amazing, and.
It's nice.
It's not difficult to make,
a very simple,
homemade, rustic soup.
But it, you know, this speaks
volumes about a restaurant.
They've built on the
live music theme.
Martin's still got
his old magic,
and now he's flambéing main
courses as well as desserts.
Looks fantastic.
- Yep.
- You sound brilliant
and it smells amazing.
- [Martin] Yep, you
actually taste it.
- [Gordon] My very
own steak Diane.
The steak's nice and rare,
it tastes exactly how
it should be.
Very good.
Daniella's retained my
simpler, more contemporary menu
and they're cooking with
fresh ingredients
rather than opening a
tin or a packet.
And the takings have quadrupled
since I was last here.
That was lovely, and I'm
really pleased it was lovely.
And you've got the
simplest things right.
- Well, you've made me
feel very brave about it,
and I just needed someone
to open my eyes up
to what's dreams and
what's reality.
- Thank god she's woken up.
She thought she'd
bought success.
She'd bought a restaurant
full of baggage
and a chef that
didn't give a fuck.
Now she's got the basics right.
She moves forward, and this
place does have a chance
of survivin' for the
next 30 years,
providing they continue.
Good food, good service,
bit of atmosphere,
and enjoy what you're doing.
It's not difficult.
(upbeat music)