King of the Hill (1997–2010): Season 13, Episode 24 - Just Another Manic Kahn-Day - full transcript
Minh and Connie go to Laos for vacation. Khan is alone at home, and Peggy makes Hank promise to check on him. Strickland wants a big promotion to sell grills and puts Hank in charge. Bobby and Joseph find an old Vaudeville comedy routine on vinyl.
Ripped By mstoll
Pajama slide!
Good purchase, Mom.
I haven't even finished
breakfast,
and that boy ain't right.
Oh, I forgot to tell you.
You and Bobby
are on your own tonight.
I'm going to Minh's
for Ladies' Game Night.
You're leaving us alone?
But you're a good buffer
for when things get awkward.
Oh, Hank, you'll be fine.
I hope we play Scrabble.
I will be unstoppable
with my two-letter words.
"Am, ho, id, na, is, if..."
Oh, there's nothing
more beautiful
than a man and his son
alone, bonding.
A time when questions
will be asked,
and answers will be given.
Yeah, I was kinda hoping
we could do something
that didn't require
a lot of conversation.
You know the type of stuff
Bobby likes to talk about.
Well, you could
rent a movie.
Ugh, he likes to act out
the "funny parts."
What about going
out to a movie?
He likes to whisper at me.
I say you take him to dinner.
There'll be people around.
You can talk to the waiter.
You have options.
Yeah, like a date.
If there's a lull
in the conversation,
just put a bread stick
in your mouth to cover.
You know, I've been wanting
to try that new steakhouse
in McMaynerbury.
If there's no live music,
that's what we'll do.
My idea. Mine.
So, uh...
How's school?
Fine.
How's work?
Fine.
Two Kansas City strips,
medium-rare.
Excuse me, sir.
There's something wrong
with our steaks.
These should be prime, and this
isn't the marbling for prime.
It's fatty in all
the wrong places.
Bobby, what are you doing?
Don't insult a man's steak
without tasting it.
You'll get us killed.
I assure you, sir, our beef
is the finest in the county.
And this bone
is so big and flat.
Everybody knows the tiny bone
side of the sirloin
is the most tender.
What kind of steak joint
is this?
Uh, look, dude, two days ago
I was working at a shoe store.
I'll go get my manager.
Wow, Bobby, you sure do know
your way around a steak.
I'd have to
agree with that.
I must say, I have never
seen someone so young
with such meat savvy.
I'm Roger Stiles,
Professor of Meat Science
at Heimlich County
Junior College.
I'm also coach of their
Meat Examination Team.
What's a Meat
Examination Team?
It's like debate team,
but instead of doing
something useless,
they compete by judging
cut and quality of meat.
Yep. I come here every night
looking for the missing link
to our team.
And tonight I found you, Bobby.
See, we're all
book learning.
We need passion.
Heck, I'm all passion.
Dad, why didn't you tell
me about any of this?
Because you're never
interested in anything good.
What do you say, Bobby?
You ready to take raw meat
to the next level?
Can I, Dad?
Can I join the team?
I have been waiting 13 years
for you to ask that.
Absolutely.
All right, Bobby,
show 'em what you got.
Two rib eyes, one porterhouse,
three filets--
One medium, two medium-rare--
And a New York strip well-done.
Well-done, indeed. Oh, man,
look at that dang ol' boy.
Aunt Peggy, you
must be so excited
to have discovered
Bobby's hidden talent.
It's like buried treasure
in his head.
Or is it his stomach?
It is very exciting, Luanne.
Who knows where
this could take him?
Oh, yeah, real far.
He'll be able to skip a semester
in hamburger school.
Yeah, this talent is
a party trick to nowhere,
but it's cute you think your boy
will be successful someday.
Soup's on.
Perfect choice, Bobby.
I've often thought my profile
bears a striking resemblance
to a New York strip.
Oh, this looks
delicious, sug.
Where on Earth did you learn
so much about meat?
One day you will
get to eat this.
The cow says moo.
The cow also says, "I have
11 distinct cuts of meat,
each with its own
taste and texture."
I guess it just
came naturally.
And the coloring indicates a
fine to moderately fine texture.
Pa-tow.
Hey, Coach.
I'm ready to work.
Should I warm up
with some ground chuck
or just jump right in?
There he is.
Everybody, this is Bobby,
the one who's gonna get us to
State and take down Texas A&F.
My name is Njorl.
Norway exchange student.
Already know herring,
need to know meats.
And I'm Lucy.
It's so super great
to meet you.
You're totally gonna be better
than our last guy.
He was deadweight.
I can feel it.
This kid's a prodigy.
I'm freaking out, guys.
I'm freaking out!
Okay-
Don't worry
about Ron.
Things get pretty
intense around here.
The smell of blood
in the air doesn't help.
I'm so psyched
to be here.
Look, I don't know
all the technical stuff yet,
but what I do know
is that the rib eye thickness
of that carcass is half an inch.
Bobby's awfully late
from practice.
His dinner's
gonna get cold.
I know. Isn't it great?
Hey, sorry I'm late.
We were doing cartilage work
and Njorl couldn't remember
his sacral from his lumbar.
We all had a good laugh.
Oh, Hank, he already has inside
jokes and smells like raw beef.
I've got to tell you,
it's pretty great
being a child prodigy.
And Coach gave me this DVD:
From the Kill to Your Plate.
Do you want to watch it later,
Dad?
Bobby, I would love to watch
Slaughterhouse with you.
...where the heart,
lungs and viscera
are separated for inspection.
This is so exciting.
Now, you've worked hard
for this and you're ready.
All we have to do
is get fourth place
to qualify for the
state championship.
We're gonna do better
than fourth place!
We're taking first!
Texas A&F is going down!
Break!
All right, Bobby!
Time for the final question.
The four teams
with the highest scores
will advance
to the state competition.
The question:
Which of these carcasses
has the most muscular round?
Heimlich County Junior College,
you're up.
Who do we send? Ron?
Ah, I suck
at muscling today.
Send me to organs
where I belong.
Bobby?
Bobby.
Bobby.
I got this.
Get 'em!
Do it!
All right!
You do good!
Go, Bobby!
Come on, Bobby!
Eat the whole thing!
Which of these carcasses
has the most muscular round?
Number two.
I'm sorry.
The answer is carcass four.
What?
Why do you look so down, son?
Your team got fourth place.
You're going to State.
Bobby is going to State.
We did it, Peggy.
I wasn't sure.
Between this trophy
and your certificate
for attendance
at vacation Bible school,
I am one proud mother.
I don't know
why everyone is so happy.
I almost blew it
for the whole team.
You're being too hard
on yourself.
This was your first competition.
If I had a nickel for every time
I buckled under pressure,
I would have five nickels.
But these guys are intense, Dad.
I've seen Coach Stiles
hack up a cow torso.
This is not a man
I want to disappoint.
You know who doesn't make
mistakes, Bobby?
Jesus?
No! I-I mean, well...
Yes, but no.
Look, the point is,
your team is going to State,
and that's all that matters.
Usually your pep talks go
in one ear and out the other,
but this time,
I'm feeling the pep!
Hey, how's everybody doing?
Well, if it isn't
Little Gristle.
hot dogs and bologna.
Okay, everybody, stop!
We don't have time
for squabbling.
Yes, Bobby screwed up
and he should be embarrassed,
and yes, we would replace him
if we had time,
but he's still
a part of this team.
Thank you.
I promise I won't let you down.
You better not.
Did you know that no one
can hear you scream
from inside a meat locker?
Interesting fact.
I bet you guys
are dying to know
why I'm holding
this piece of paper.
I was afraid to ask.
It's been killing me.
It's a form
to make a deposit for a seat
on the meat team's
State-bound chartered bus.
Ooh.
There is no greater sign
that a competition is legitimate
than the chartering of a bus.
Yep. My son is going to State.
Bobby and I will have
stuff to talk about
for the rest of our lives.
Trimness. Less fat
opposite the rib eye.
Less kidney, pelvic heart fat.
Less fat over the brisket,
chuck, loin, plate,
inside round...
I'm ready
to stop learning about beef
and start eating it!
Everybody knows
you don't sully your palate
with meat the night
before competition.
That's incredibly basic.
That's day one.
It's all sides.
Family style.
And an egg white omelet
to share.
Oh, my god! It's
the Texas A&F team!
Let's stab one
in the restroom!
No! Let's blind them.
They can't grade beef
if they can't see it.
Bobby, hand me
the red pepper flakes.
Wait, you're serious?
Go grade some tofu, you losers!
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God! He just threw
pepper in their faces!
What is he doing?!
Thinking like a champ.
How was dinner?
Did you eat lots of protein
and say some prayers?
We did neither, unless
you consider eggs protein.
I do not.
Turns out these meat team people
are a bunch of weirdos.
A boy who has a unicorn
ranch in his bedroom
shouldn't call
other people weird.
That's right. We know
about Rancho Unicorno.
I am telling you,
these guys are freaks.
They don't know where meat ends
and they begin.
What you're seeing is
what's called team spirit.
It's like the Holy Spirit,
but more powerful.
Dad, I'm quitting the team.
What? No!
We were so close!
Why would you
pass up the chance
to compete at
the state level?
Especially when
that state is Texas?
I'm sorry, Dad.
Well, I'm gonna
support this team
whether you do or not.
When Hank Hill reserves
a seat on a team bus,
he is gonna be on that bus.
Fine. Enjoy a bunch
of crazy people
rambling about meat all day.
You know that I will.
Name, please?
Hill.
Hank and Bobby?
Just Hank.
Aw.
He just quit on me, Kaylee.
He thinks all these
people are crazy.
Can you believe it?
Sad.
What the...?
Listen up, people. Y'all
won't be going anywhere today.
Least of all, the
state championship.
That's right, jerks.
You're being hijacked.
Texas A&F rules!
Cell phones
in the bag.
Now!
I knew this
was gonna happen!
Why on Earth would you think
we'd be hijacked?
It doesn't make any sense.
Makes perfect sense.
We are going to take
state championship from them.
We must be hijacked.
Y'all could kiss State good-bye.
Wow, the Vogner "Little Man."
Mm-hmm, your father wanted
to surprise you.
It was supposed
to be waiting for you
when you got back
from the tournament,
but you're not at
the tournament.
Dad got this for me?
Yeah, he wanted
to grill together,
just you and him.
He doesn't want
to grill with me.
All he cares about is
that I'm on some team.
This isn't about
you being on a team.
It isn't even about beef.
What your father cares about
is that you two
finally have something in common.
Really?
He's never chartered a bus
for me, Bobby...
as much as I've asked him to.
Mom, get me to State.
Excuse me, sir.
I'm Bobby Hill
from Heimlich County J.C.
I'm looking for my team.
You're it, son.
The rest of your squad's
a no-show.
That can't be!
All they've got is beef grading.
Where are they?
Your father's not answering
his cell phone.
Are you in or out?
Check it out.
I'm in.
All in.
Every event.
Hey, Hank.
We thought we'd lost you.
This is a stupid place
for a meat tournament.
We were hijacked and stranded
by meat-grading hooligans,
you idiots.
Wow, I guess it's a good thing
we blindly followed you here
instead of using a map.
Or common sense.
What are we waiting for?
To the Beef-a-Bago!
Let's go! Let's go! Let's go!
Dang ol' hello?
Oh, man, talkin'
'bout ol' Peggy, man,
want to talk to you, man.
Peggy?
Really?!
Oh, there was just a hijacking.
I'll fill you in later.
We're on our way.
Great news!
Bobby's at the tournament!
He's competing right now.
Oh, no!
He's going
to ruin everything!
We're toast.
Despair for me.
Hey, that's no way
to talk about your teammate.
He's saving your hides
right now.
Doubtful.
He's terrible.
He's a fjortoft.
Come on now.
Bobby may have
different talents than you,
but one thing you all share is
your love of top quality beef.
I don't care about beef.
I only care about winning.
Dude, I'm
a vegetarian.
What?!
You guys are even weirder
than Bobby let on.
No wonder he wanted
to quit the team.
I'm gonna sit in
the back with the cow.
All competitors, please
report to the examining stations.
This piece of veal thinks
he's gonna beat us?
I do my talking
on the carcass.
Whoo-hoo! Oh, yeah!
The final event will determine
the Texas State collegiate
meat-grading champion.
Each team must determine whether
the specimen beef is prime beef
or flawed in any way.
Good luck.
The competition's
still going on.
We've still got a chance.
Bobby's in the finals!
Thanks for somehow
not screwing things up.
But now is the time
when you choke.
Step aside.
Okay.
It looks prime, but there's got
to be a flaw somewhere.
It's perfect.
This is the marbling
of your fantasies.
They just want us to think
there's a flaw.
It's a trick!
Why aren't you
up there, son?
They're afraid
I'm gonna choke again.
But, Dad,
I think I saw a flaw.
Really?
I think so.
It's something
in the chine button.
Are you sure?
Yes, I am.
Then it's time to speak up.
Have you reached a decision?
Prime?
Prime!
Prime?
Prime!
Hardbone!
No, no, no!
If you look closely
at the chine button
Of the 13th rib,
you will see
it has begun to ossify.
This carcass is too old
to be prime.
hardbone!
Correct.
Heimlich County
is the new state champion.
Boy, I could listen
to the sound of sizzle
all day long.
It's pretty relaxing.
What do you say we mooch
some hillbilly barbecue?
I haven't finished
my organic chemistry homework.
You're three grades
ahead already.
Take the night off.
Oh, thank you, sug.
My headache feels a lot better.
Well, I may not have
John Redcorn's healing touch,
but I do know a lot
about the female body
on account I once saw
a possum ripped apart.
I smell beef!
Don't even fool with shoes.
Grab Gracie and let's go!
Look at you,
my two Hill men.
We might need more food.
We've got company.
Well, Dad, it looks like
this is the last one.
Oh, you're just
getting started, Bobby.
You'll be grilling
your whole life.
Just like you.
Yep.
Yep. Yep. Yep. Mm-hmm.
Ripped By mstoll
Pajama slide!
Good purchase, Mom.
I haven't even finished
breakfast,
and that boy ain't right.
Oh, I forgot to tell you.
You and Bobby
are on your own tonight.
I'm going to Minh's
for Ladies' Game Night.
You're leaving us alone?
But you're a good buffer
for when things get awkward.
Oh, Hank, you'll be fine.
I hope we play Scrabble.
I will be unstoppable
with my two-letter words.
"Am, ho, id, na, is, if..."
Oh, there's nothing
more beautiful
than a man and his son
alone, bonding.
A time when questions
will be asked,
and answers will be given.
Yeah, I was kinda hoping
we could do something
that didn't require
a lot of conversation.
You know the type of stuff
Bobby likes to talk about.
Well, you could
rent a movie.
Ugh, he likes to act out
the "funny parts."
What about going
out to a movie?
He likes to whisper at me.
I say you take him to dinner.
There'll be people around.
You can talk to the waiter.
You have options.
Yeah, like a date.
If there's a lull
in the conversation,
just put a bread stick
in your mouth to cover.
You know, I've been wanting
to try that new steakhouse
in McMaynerbury.
If there's no live music,
that's what we'll do.
My idea. Mine.
So, uh...
How's school?
Fine.
How's work?
Fine.
Two Kansas City strips,
medium-rare.
Excuse me, sir.
There's something wrong
with our steaks.
These should be prime, and this
isn't the marbling for prime.
It's fatty in all
the wrong places.
Bobby, what are you doing?
Don't insult a man's steak
without tasting it.
You'll get us killed.
I assure you, sir, our beef
is the finest in the county.
And this bone
is so big and flat.
Everybody knows the tiny bone
side of the sirloin
is the most tender.
What kind of steak joint
is this?
Uh, look, dude, two days ago
I was working at a shoe store.
I'll go get my manager.
Wow, Bobby, you sure do know
your way around a steak.
I'd have to
agree with that.
I must say, I have never
seen someone so young
with such meat savvy.
I'm Roger Stiles,
Professor of Meat Science
at Heimlich County
Junior College.
I'm also coach of their
Meat Examination Team.
What's a Meat
Examination Team?
It's like debate team,
but instead of doing
something useless,
they compete by judging
cut and quality of meat.
Yep. I come here every night
looking for the missing link
to our team.
And tonight I found you, Bobby.
See, we're all
book learning.
We need passion.
Heck, I'm all passion.
Dad, why didn't you tell
me about any of this?
Because you're never
interested in anything good.
What do you say, Bobby?
You ready to take raw meat
to the next level?
Can I, Dad?
Can I join the team?
I have been waiting 13 years
for you to ask that.
Absolutely.
All right, Bobby,
show 'em what you got.
Two rib eyes, one porterhouse,
three filets--
One medium, two medium-rare--
And a New York strip well-done.
Well-done, indeed. Oh, man,
look at that dang ol' boy.
Aunt Peggy, you
must be so excited
to have discovered
Bobby's hidden talent.
It's like buried treasure
in his head.
Or is it his stomach?
It is very exciting, Luanne.
Who knows where
this could take him?
Oh, yeah, real far.
He'll be able to skip a semester
in hamburger school.
Yeah, this talent is
a party trick to nowhere,
but it's cute you think your boy
will be successful someday.
Soup's on.
Perfect choice, Bobby.
I've often thought my profile
bears a striking resemblance
to a New York strip.
Oh, this looks
delicious, sug.
Where on Earth did you learn
so much about meat?
One day you will
get to eat this.
The cow says moo.
The cow also says, "I have
11 distinct cuts of meat,
each with its own
taste and texture."
I guess it just
came naturally.
And the coloring indicates a
fine to moderately fine texture.
Pa-tow.
Hey, Coach.
I'm ready to work.
Should I warm up
with some ground chuck
or just jump right in?
There he is.
Everybody, this is Bobby,
the one who's gonna get us to
State and take down Texas A&F.
My name is Njorl.
Norway exchange student.
Already know herring,
need to know meats.
And I'm Lucy.
It's so super great
to meet you.
You're totally gonna be better
than our last guy.
He was deadweight.
I can feel it.
This kid's a prodigy.
I'm freaking out, guys.
I'm freaking out!
Okay-
Don't worry
about Ron.
Things get pretty
intense around here.
The smell of blood
in the air doesn't help.
I'm so psyched
to be here.
Look, I don't know
all the technical stuff yet,
but what I do know
is that the rib eye thickness
of that carcass is half an inch.
Bobby's awfully late
from practice.
His dinner's
gonna get cold.
I know. Isn't it great?
Hey, sorry I'm late.
We were doing cartilage work
and Njorl couldn't remember
his sacral from his lumbar.
We all had a good laugh.
Oh, Hank, he already has inside
jokes and smells like raw beef.
I've got to tell you,
it's pretty great
being a child prodigy.
And Coach gave me this DVD:
From the Kill to Your Plate.
Do you want to watch it later,
Dad?
Bobby, I would love to watch
Slaughterhouse with you.
...where the heart,
lungs and viscera
are separated for inspection.
This is so exciting.
Now, you've worked hard
for this and you're ready.
All we have to do
is get fourth place
to qualify for the
state championship.
We're gonna do better
than fourth place!
We're taking first!
Texas A&F is going down!
Break!
All right, Bobby!
Time for the final question.
The four teams
with the highest scores
will advance
to the state competition.
The question:
Which of these carcasses
has the most muscular round?
Heimlich County Junior College,
you're up.
Who do we send? Ron?
Ah, I suck
at muscling today.
Send me to organs
where I belong.
Bobby?
Bobby.
Bobby.
I got this.
Get 'em!
Do it!
All right!
You do good!
Go, Bobby!
Come on, Bobby!
Eat the whole thing!
Which of these carcasses
has the most muscular round?
Number two.
I'm sorry.
The answer is carcass four.
What?
Why do you look so down, son?
Your team got fourth place.
You're going to State.
Bobby is going to State.
We did it, Peggy.
I wasn't sure.
Between this trophy
and your certificate
for attendance
at vacation Bible school,
I am one proud mother.
I don't know
why everyone is so happy.
I almost blew it
for the whole team.
You're being too hard
on yourself.
This was your first competition.
If I had a nickel for every time
I buckled under pressure,
I would have five nickels.
But these guys are intense, Dad.
I've seen Coach Stiles
hack up a cow torso.
This is not a man
I want to disappoint.
You know who doesn't make
mistakes, Bobby?
Jesus?
No! I-I mean, well...
Yes, but no.
Look, the point is,
your team is going to State,
and that's all that matters.
Usually your pep talks go
in one ear and out the other,
but this time,
I'm feeling the pep!
Hey, how's everybody doing?
Well, if it isn't
Little Gristle.
hot dogs and bologna.
Okay, everybody, stop!
We don't have time
for squabbling.
Yes, Bobby screwed up
and he should be embarrassed,
and yes, we would replace him
if we had time,
but he's still
a part of this team.
Thank you.
I promise I won't let you down.
You better not.
Did you know that no one
can hear you scream
from inside a meat locker?
Interesting fact.
I bet you guys
are dying to know
why I'm holding
this piece of paper.
I was afraid to ask.
It's been killing me.
It's a form
to make a deposit for a seat
on the meat team's
State-bound chartered bus.
Ooh.
There is no greater sign
that a competition is legitimate
than the chartering of a bus.
Yep. My son is going to State.
Bobby and I will have
stuff to talk about
for the rest of our lives.
Trimness. Less fat
opposite the rib eye.
Less kidney, pelvic heart fat.
Less fat over the brisket,
chuck, loin, plate,
inside round...
I'm ready
to stop learning about beef
and start eating it!
Everybody knows
you don't sully your palate
with meat the night
before competition.
That's incredibly basic.
That's day one.
It's all sides.
Family style.
And an egg white omelet
to share.
Oh, my god! It's
the Texas A&F team!
Let's stab one
in the restroom!
No! Let's blind them.
They can't grade beef
if they can't see it.
Bobby, hand me
the red pepper flakes.
Wait, you're serious?
Go grade some tofu, you losers!
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God! He just threw
pepper in their faces!
What is he doing?!
Thinking like a champ.
How was dinner?
Did you eat lots of protein
and say some prayers?
We did neither, unless
you consider eggs protein.
I do not.
Turns out these meat team people
are a bunch of weirdos.
A boy who has a unicorn
ranch in his bedroom
shouldn't call
other people weird.
That's right. We know
about Rancho Unicorno.
I am telling you,
these guys are freaks.
They don't know where meat ends
and they begin.
What you're seeing is
what's called team spirit.
It's like the Holy Spirit,
but more powerful.
Dad, I'm quitting the team.
What? No!
We were so close!
Why would you
pass up the chance
to compete at
the state level?
Especially when
that state is Texas?
I'm sorry, Dad.
Well, I'm gonna
support this team
whether you do or not.
When Hank Hill reserves
a seat on a team bus,
he is gonna be on that bus.
Fine. Enjoy a bunch
of crazy people
rambling about meat all day.
You know that I will.
Name, please?
Hill.
Hank and Bobby?
Just Hank.
Aw.
He just quit on me, Kaylee.
He thinks all these
people are crazy.
Can you believe it?
Sad.
What the...?
Listen up, people. Y'all
won't be going anywhere today.
Least of all, the
state championship.
That's right, jerks.
You're being hijacked.
Texas A&F rules!
Cell phones
in the bag.
Now!
I knew this
was gonna happen!
Why on Earth would you think
we'd be hijacked?
It doesn't make any sense.
Makes perfect sense.
We are going to take
state championship from them.
We must be hijacked.
Y'all could kiss State good-bye.
Wow, the Vogner "Little Man."
Mm-hmm, your father wanted
to surprise you.
It was supposed
to be waiting for you
when you got back
from the tournament,
but you're not at
the tournament.
Dad got this for me?
Yeah, he wanted
to grill together,
just you and him.
He doesn't want
to grill with me.
All he cares about is
that I'm on some team.
This isn't about
you being on a team.
It isn't even about beef.
What your father cares about
is that you two
finally have something in common.
Really?
He's never chartered a bus
for me, Bobby...
as much as I've asked him to.
Mom, get me to State.
Excuse me, sir.
I'm Bobby Hill
from Heimlich County J.C.
I'm looking for my team.
You're it, son.
The rest of your squad's
a no-show.
That can't be!
All they've got is beef grading.
Where are they?
Your father's not answering
his cell phone.
Are you in or out?
Check it out.
I'm in.
All in.
Every event.
Hey, Hank.
We thought we'd lost you.
This is a stupid place
for a meat tournament.
We were hijacked and stranded
by meat-grading hooligans,
you idiots.
Wow, I guess it's a good thing
we blindly followed you here
instead of using a map.
Or common sense.
What are we waiting for?
To the Beef-a-Bago!
Let's go! Let's go! Let's go!
Dang ol' hello?
Oh, man, talkin'
'bout ol' Peggy, man,
want to talk to you, man.
Peggy?
Really?!
Oh, there was just a hijacking.
I'll fill you in later.
We're on our way.
Great news!
Bobby's at the tournament!
He's competing right now.
Oh, no!
He's going
to ruin everything!
We're toast.
Despair for me.
Hey, that's no way
to talk about your teammate.
He's saving your hides
right now.
Doubtful.
He's terrible.
He's a fjortoft.
Come on now.
Bobby may have
different talents than you,
but one thing you all share is
your love of top quality beef.
I don't care about beef.
I only care about winning.
Dude, I'm
a vegetarian.
What?!
You guys are even weirder
than Bobby let on.
No wonder he wanted
to quit the team.
I'm gonna sit in
the back with the cow.
All competitors, please
report to the examining stations.
This piece of veal thinks
he's gonna beat us?
I do my talking
on the carcass.
Whoo-hoo! Oh, yeah!
The final event will determine
the Texas State collegiate
meat-grading champion.
Each team must determine whether
the specimen beef is prime beef
or flawed in any way.
Good luck.
The competition's
still going on.
We've still got a chance.
Bobby's in the finals!
Thanks for somehow
not screwing things up.
But now is the time
when you choke.
Step aside.
Okay.
It looks prime, but there's got
to be a flaw somewhere.
It's perfect.
This is the marbling
of your fantasies.
They just want us to think
there's a flaw.
It's a trick!
Why aren't you
up there, son?
They're afraid
I'm gonna choke again.
But, Dad,
I think I saw a flaw.
Really?
I think so.
It's something
in the chine button.
Are you sure?
Yes, I am.
Then it's time to speak up.
Have you reached a decision?
Prime?
Prime!
Prime?
Prime!
Hardbone!
No, no, no!
If you look closely
at the chine button
Of the 13th rib,
you will see
it has begun to ossify.
This carcass is too old
to be prime.
hardbone!
Correct.
Heimlich County
is the new state champion.
Boy, I could listen
to the sound of sizzle
all day long.
It's pretty relaxing.
What do you say we mooch
some hillbilly barbecue?
I haven't finished
my organic chemistry homework.
You're three grades
ahead already.
Take the night off.
Oh, thank you, sug.
My headache feels a lot better.
Well, I may not have
John Redcorn's healing touch,
but I do know a lot
about the female body
on account I once saw
a possum ripped apart.
I smell beef!
Don't even fool with shoes.
Grab Gracie and let's go!
Look at you,
my two Hill men.
We might need more food.
We've got company.
Well, Dad, it looks like
this is the last one.
Oh, you're just
getting started, Bobby.
You'll be grilling
your whole life.
Just like you.
Yep.
Yep. Yep. Yep. Mm-hmm.
Ripped By mstoll