Kim's Convenience (2016–…): Season 3, Episode 2 - Cutie Pie - full transcript

- I'm so full, you finish?
- Yeah.

- Ew!
- What?

- Oh, that's gross.
- What's gross?

Bowl backwash. One bowl per person.

When you was little,
we all eat from same bowl.

First, Appa, then me,
then Jung, then you.

- You're not serious.
- Yeah, same spoon too.

- Why didn't we use our own bowls?
- It's natural, like a bird.

- How?
- When you were the little,

we first chew your food
to make a soft, then...

- Give to you.
- Oh! Stop.



That's nothing. You know
how we trim toenail?

No, I don't want to.

- With our teeth.
- I said no!

- Want to know how we cut you hair?
- No!

- With scissor.
- Oh.

Then, we use your
hair to make a pillow.

- I can't.
- What? I just kidding.

We never use a scissor!

- And, uh, here you change.
- Said the wisher to the well.

- Okay, see you.
- Okay, Mr. Kim.

Frank, what you want?

Well, if you're gonna hold
my feet to the furnace.

I need your help in the cyberspace.

- What?
- The internet, Twitter, Spacebook.



I know what the internet is.

I need a positive web
review for my business.

My ex-wife, Bernice, went on the
Google after a bottle of shiraz

and really took me to task.
Zero stars.

Left a lovely review
for the wine, mind you.

Why you even have online review?

You're not really a modern
business without 'em.

There's probably a whole bunch of
them out there for Kim's. May I?

Uh, Mrs. Kim is watch Shakira video.

Mmm-hmm.

Here we go.

- Kim's Convenience.
- I not do this.

Wow! Four stars. "Love this place.

Great prices on the Cherry Sours.

And that Mr. Kim is a real cutie pie."

- "Cutie pie"?
- Uh-oh. Clear history, wink-wink.

Oh! Oh! I think really
did clear your history.

"He's even sweeter than the treat."

Bernice used to say things like that.

Not about me, but...

No, I had a run of five cards,
so, that's five points.

Maybe. I don't get this game.

- I thought you taught her.
- He did.

- Yeah, that's why she doesn't get it.
- Oh, my God, is that the time?

Got to bail. Early morning. See ya.

- Text me when you get home.
- Ha-ha.

- I thought she was going home.
- She is, hopefully.

I need a break from spooning.
She's a little spoon...

- This is the fifth time this week.
- I know.

She can't keep staying here.
She doesn't pay for rent.

Water, heater, hydro...

If you could keep it down,
that'd be great.

We'll just pretend
like we didn't hear her.

- Guys, did you hear me?
- Yes.

So, uh, did Shannon mention what
you'd be doing when you came back?

No, I just figured,
you know? Keep it profesh.

But, hey, you're assistant
manager, I get it.

And I couldn't be happier
that you're back.

- Yeah. Jung-Chee re-united!
- Yeah, baby.

Okay, see you there.

We're still a block away.

Yeah, but I don't want to be seen
giving you special treatment.

It could undermine my authority.

I talked to you all the time
when I was assistant manager.

Yeah, and it really
undermined your authority.

- You seriously want me to get out?
- This is my "me time."

Things get real.

We're close, but trust me, you don't
want to see "block-away Kimchee."

Fine.

Crazy online review of a store, huh?

Guess, uh, some people
must really like store owner.

Me.

I'll, uh, leave you
to your fans, Mr. Kim.

Thank you, Fatima.

- Hmm.
- Huh?

- Oh, no, hope you don't get jealous.
- Why?

They is crazy or ugly.

- Why you say like that?
- Because everyone who write online

is crazy or ugly.

Beside, you is not a cutie pie.

- You is more like, uh, bread.
- Bread?

Yeah, big, round, crusty loaf.

And not everyone want a cutie pie.

Some people
want rough, old teddy bear.

One eye already missing, arm
falling off, but they don't care.

They like all the stain or smell.

Mmm. Yobo, you need
to moisturize, hmm?

And, this is where the magic happens.

You don't have to say that
for every room.

- Stacey, Omar, this is Jung.
- Hey.

Hey.

- Oh, and there's Kimchee.
- Yeah, we've met.

Yeah, but he's different now.

- Drunk with power.
- Hey, guys, looking good.

See?

- Well, welcome to Handy.
- Oh, I used to work here.

It's actually really funny story...

Well, we should
probably get back to it.

- Can you clean the Elantra?
- And you might want to put this on.

I can hold up a towel
while you change.

- Huh.
- Am I using your mug?

Oh, no, it's fine. I'll just use
one of Gerald's mom's creations.

It's just Gerald said you
think I hang around too much.

No, I was just...

We were talking about rent.

And I said something about three people
taking more showers than two people.

I don't even know if that's true.

- It makes sense.
- I mean, I love having you around.

It's just not
as economically feasible.

- I totally get it.
- Great.

There. Just sent you an
e-transfer for the expenses.

- Wow.
- Let me know if you need more.

You can use the whole couch
if you want.

Mrs. Kim say I not a cutie pie.

- I agree...
- Wha...

With you. Definite cutie pie.

- Yeah.
- I've seen this story 1,000 times.

It starts with casual flirtation and ends
with Mr. Kim chopped up in a pot of soup.

Huh? Why I in a pot of soup?

How would I know? I'm not
inside the mind of a lunatic.

I know! I offer her big
discount on Cherry Sours

next time she visit.

One order of catfish coming up.

I just offer discount for
such a positive review, huh?

And prove to Mrs. Kim I'm cutie pie.

The real crime would
be not responding...

To a murder, which is an actual crime.

I post.

I'm impressed. I don't think
I could have done it.

I'll be sure your ashes are
spread evenly around the store.

What? No big deal. Yeah.

- Review woman probably never even see.
- Huh? -

- Oh, she see.
- And?

Kissy face.

Got new scratch and win.

The weather. My God! It's everywhere.

- Oh, my.
- Weird, right? No tie?

- Is that a men's?
- Ha-ha! Good one.

I just wanted to check in, you
know, early days, touch base.

How are you... Fitting in?

Everyone is so nice. Stace, the O-man,

although, I am still
trying to figure out

the whole power dynamics
since the merge.

Ugh. You and me, both.

- 'Cause I used to be, like, up here.
- Mmm-hmm.

So, if you're like up here, and
Kimchee is here, then am I... Here?

Like, here.

- Okay, so, like, here?
- Here.

So, here.

Did you just lower your chair?

- Did I?
- Oh, hey.

- I didn't know we were meeting.
- Oh, not a meeting.

Charlie and I were just... I'm
sorry, what were we talking about?

Just checking in with the Shanster.

Oh, hey, well,
if there's anything you need,

you can always run it by me first.

- Probably a good call.
- Absolutely.

Just... We have a short hand.

Yeah, well, we got a short-hand

and you and I have a short-hand,

so, it's like a shorter short-hand.

And I actually have long hands.

My dad used to call them
piano fingers.

Hey, why don't we, uh,
get you back to the garage?

Yep, anything I can do
to help the team.

Hey, maybe, get you a bigger shirt?

That would be helpful.

Just use the stairs
like a normie, Gerald.

Oh, are you going somewhere?

Yeah, here.

- Hi.
- Oh, hey.

What's all this stuff?

- Uh... Uh...
- What's going on?

I think she's moving in.

I just need some air.
Is there any air in here?

- Why is this happening?
- I have no idea.

Why didn't we think of this before?

When did we think of this?

My parents are so psyched
to get rid of me.

- Isn't this great?
- Is it?

Unless I totally misread something

and you want me to go.

- No, no.
- No, of course, not.

- Yeah.
- Thank God.

Because I'm crazy about this guy.

And I did send you that money, which
you accepted, like, right away.

Why did you take her money?

Because she was living
with us for free.

- I don't want to live with a girl.
- You lived with me.

- You don't count.
- Thanks.

Now breaking up with her
is going to be impossible.

- I didn't know you were trying.
- I am!

I think. I'm not like you, you know.
I'm just not that good at...

What?

Telling people
what they don't want to hear.

- You're being weak.
- I know.

See? You're good at this.
You should do it.

No! I'm not breaking up
with Chelsea for you.

Even though I would have
done it really well.

Hey, did you move the rag bin?

Uh, yeah, I thought it made
more sense over there.

I like it.

- Hey, what's going on?
- I fixed the rag bin.

Wait, the rag bin's broken?

No, just made more sense there.

Terence, did you take the key
to the woman's washroom again?

It's clean in there.

We have keys for the washrooms?

Shouldn't they just be unlocked?

- Yeah.
- Okay, that's terrifying.

- I agree with Jung.
- Yo.

Where's the rag bin?

God, Stacie! Keep up.

And why is the lunch room
so far from the garage?

It is far.

That's a good point, Omar.
You know what?

I'm going to write some of this down.

One bag. All fit, hmm?

Okay, see you.

I believe I was promised a discount.

You write online review for store?

Guilty. I'm Lisa.

Oh. You is not crazy or ugly.

I mean, you the normal.

Not normal. Very pretty.

I don't know. I only see customer.
Nothing else.

Aw! You really are a cutie pie.

- Here is what you're looking for.
- Oh, no.

- I don't want that.
- Shh!

Well, thank you for the discount.

Pay less now, pay for dentist later.

Oh, you're terrible.

Oh, that's very good questions.

Oh, I haven't asked it yet.

- It's actually about...
- Shh!

- Okay, see you.
- Take care.

Yobo, you see?

All I see is you
making fool of yourself.

So, you do see.

She only flirting with you
to get a discount.

Yeah, that's what happened, uh?

Big conspiracy.

Candy Bandit strike again.

Ugh, fine. Don't listen to me.

Just trying to protect you.

Protect me from Candy
Bandit compliment?

She probably laughing at you
right now.

Be careful!

If you leave a cutie pie on a
window sill, someone might steal.

Did I hear Cherry Sours on special?

Not for you.

- Whoa.
- The chair won't go up.

I found a wrench but I can
also get you a booster seat.

Hey, I was just looking for ya.

In Shannon's office?

- Well, you're here, aren't you?
- About that,

Kimchee and I were talking

and we think it'd be best if we all
respect the new chain of command.

- Absolutely. I just want...
- ♪ I., la, la, la, la

Sorry, kidding.

But you should tell it to Kimchee.

- Sure.
- Pretend I'm not even here.

What's up, man?

Well, it's probably nothing,
but I couldn't help but notice

a bit of a divide between
management and the workers.

Really? Sorry, not listening.

Anyway, they've brought a number
of issues to my attention.

You've been here a day.

Anyway, I made a list
of concerns, suggestions.

"Shorten hallway to lunchroom."

Yeah, I could probably
work with them on that.

The important part is all of
this could be easily managed

with the right point-person
in the back.

Well, that's not a bad idea.

And I'll be honest. It's been
really hard since they merge.

We're all taking more work home,

and you try to stay positive

but cats figure it out.

I just think that we
could all benefit from,

I don't know, a back manager.

Strong suggestion, bro.

Hey, I'm just trying to help.

And I'll see what we can do about
getting you some butter pants.

- Oh, um, better pens.
- Oh.

The apartment, right?
It isn't that big of a place.

Uh-huh.

And Janet and I have a tonne
of school work to do.

- And there's the kitchen and cooking.
- I love cooking.

I know.

Um, it just

might be unfair to Janet
to have a third roommate.

It's a lot for her and other people.

- I get it.
- Oh, great.

Great. Okay.

Oh, hey, I didn't realize you guys
are here. I'll just come back later.

No, stay. Gerald
and I were just talking

and I agree with him.

You do?

So, we're gonna find
a place of our own.

- What?
- No.

I don't think that
that's what I was saying.

Oh, are you saying Janet should
move out? That doesn't seem fair.

I think what Gerald is trying to say

is you were super generous
with the rent money.

Oh, and I got us HBO. Just a sec,
I've got cupcakes in the oven.

It's just that we're always in each
other's space when it's so small.

And it could be bigger
if one of us were to leave.

- Do you want to leave, Gerald?
- Not by myself.

So you do want
to get a place together?

Is this a subscription to Elle?

I got us The New Yorker too.

Oh, my God,
you went to The Big Carrot.

Look, I just think there's one scenario
that we haven't considered yet.

I just don't want to leave
Janet in the lurch.

Mmm, no, me neither.

Moving out is so hard

and finding other people to live
with is a whole other story.

There are a lot of weirdos out there.

Maybe, we just stay like this for now.

- What are you doing?
- These are really good.

We are gonna get so fat.

Again, sorry for the delay.

- Getting used to the route.
- Some thing are worth the wait.

- That's very kind.
- She mean box of chip.

Oh, just don't listen to him. He's just
my brother. My grumpy, older brother.

- Okay, that's enough.
- I'm Carl, by the way.

- Yong-mi.
- Mrs. Kim.

Guess we'll be seeing
a lot of each other.

- Oh.
- I meant with the deliveries.

- Okay, thank you. Bye.
- Oh, Carl.

This box is little bit damaged.

Is there anything you can do?

Guess I could take 15% off.

That's okay! We pay full price.

- You do that for me?
- Sure.

Hmm. Here's your invoice.

That's our number
and, uh, that is my number.

Yobo?

If you ever want to get
a coffee or somethin...

- Oh, no.
- Oh, I'm sorry.

I thought I picked up on some... I
just got out of a relationship.

It is so hard putting yourself
back out there.

Oh, no, no. You're not wrong.
I give you signal.

Oh, oh, okay.

Well, do you like barbecue

- because I know this great place...
- No.

Right. I'm going to go now.

- It goes in recycling.
- It's garbage.

It still goes in recycling.

Is there an issue here?

I guess we should take it up
with the "back manager."

- So, what's up?
- Terence.

Is this garbage or recycling?

- Um, recycling.
- Damn.

I guess he is helpful.

- Dude, you made Terence back manager?
- Yeah, great idea, man.

- Seriously, Terence?
- Since you left, he's got seniority.

And he's very dedicated.

No, Mom, I didn't get fired.
Why do you always think that?

Sorry, dude. I know it sucks.

It's okay. Meet you at the corner?

Forget the corner. You ride
with me the whole way.

- Thanks, man.
- Yeah, but slouch, so I look taller.

- Oh.
- Hello.

You leave me in store
alone for so long time.

Why you worried?

Just call hot potato Carl!

Well, you online dating
with candy Lisa girl.

You call me one-eyed teddy bear.

- Say I you ugly brother.
- I never say ugly.

- I say older.
- Ah, same thing.

Yobo?

I think you is handsome.

And sweet.

Then why you say those other thing?

Because I don't like how candy
woman is calling you cutie pie.

And how she looking at you.

- How she looking at me?
- Like you is a great, big Cherry Sour

on discount.

And how you looking at me?

Like you is my favorite thing.

You is like a special dish.

Hidden on back of menu,
way down at bottom.

Only I order, no one else like it.

Tastes funny.
People complain to manager.

- Almost take off menu because...
- Okay, okay.

You really don't know
how to talk to people.

- You the lucky you the married to me.
- I know.

Oh. So strong.

Like rhinoceros.

Hi.

Do you have cinnamon?

I mean, she's funny. She likes pizza.

You like pizza. This is good for you.

Hey, roomies.
I got my name on the lease,

- so everything's official.
- Oh. Okay.

And I can't believe you didn't
have renter's insurance.

- So, I got us that, too.
- Great, thanks.

That's really involved.

No problem. I'll just
add it to the receipts.

- I'm sorry, those are...
- Organic groceries,

HBO, magazine subscriptions,

air purifier. Oh!

- My Aveda shampoo Janet likes.
- I only used it once.

We'll split it three ways.

You can just e-transfer me
whenever you like.

- I'm getting another cupcake.
- Get 'em all.

What's a problem? I give you review.

You reviewed me as a
customer for your store.

- Yeah.
- Not a very good one at that.

- Though it is fair.
- Excuse me, do you have Cherry Sours?

Oh, I guess we just found
your secret admirer.

- Wait, no.
- Madam.

- He's married.
- She just want the candy.

Don't we all.

Hi, there.

I'm Frank.