Hercules (1998–1999): Season 1, Episode 50 - Hercules and the Spring of Canathus - full transcript
♪ Who put the
"glad" in gladiator? ♪
♪ Hercules ♪
♪ Whose daring deeds
are great theater? ♪
♪ Hercules ♪
♪ Is he bold? ♪
♪ No one braver ♪
♪ Is he sweet? ♪
♪ Our favorite
flavor, Hercules ♪
- ♪ What a guy ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
- ♪ Ask his friends ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
♪ Honey, they won't lie ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
- ♪ Ah, Hercules ♪
♪ Hercules ♪
- ♪ Come on ♪
- ♪ No one's fool ♪
♪ Now the boy's in school ♪
♪ He's in trainin' ♪
♪ Sun is shinin' ♪
♪ And the nicest guy ♪
♪ No complainin' ♪
♪ He was a no one ♪
♪ Zero, zero, give
him a quick deed ♪
♪ He's our hero ♪
♪ He's the most
likely to succeed ♪
♪ From zero to hero ♪
♪ Herc is a hero ♪
♪ He'll be a hero ♪
Wait and see!
From the beginning,
Hercules was a...
Well, he was a little cutie.
He made you want to
tickle him under the chin
and go goochee-goochee
goo, goochee-goochee-goochee.
Bob, what are you
goochee-goochee-goo-ing about?
Oh, uh, hi, I... Yes, well, I...
I was just about to point out how
heroic Hercules was even as a baby.
Whoa. Being a baby
doesn't take heroics.
Uh-uh. Now, caring for a
baby, honey, that takes heroics.
Midnight feedings, all that
crying. Changing nasty diapers.
All right, all right. I get your point.
But this story is about Hercules.
And as you may remember, he
had it tough right from the start,
when Hades' impish underlings,
Pain and Panic, tried to do him in.
Fortunately, he survived
that vicious attack
to become the brave, bold
hero-in-training we all know and love.
Oh, dear. This is terrible!
All right, come on.
Give me your best shot.
A fire-breathing bull?
You know, you might
have warned me about that.
Sorry.
Well, that should take care
of your Cretan bull problem.
Yeah. Nice going, jerk.
Uh, young man.
Well, I better be
going. I'm... Oh, no!
Whew! It's safe.
Hmm?
Come on, Pegasus,
I'm late for school. Bye!
Bye!
Aah!
He did it again!
Aw, he always
does it again. Gah!
So, boys, how goes
Operation Bull? Good?
Oh, the same as Operation
Dragon, Operation Lion...
Oh, yeah, yeah. Don't forget
Operation Rabid Chicken.
I told you that
one wouldn't work.
OK, here's one.
Operation "last chance."
I want Hercules down
for the count by sunset!
Or guess what? It's
date night down under.
Just you and one
of my old flames!
Ow.
Simmer. Simmer, simmer, class.
Egg check!
Are you all caring for your egg
as if it was your own baby child?
Oh, you betcha.
You call me proud
papa, Miss Euphrosyne.
I even named mine Bud.
Made him some wax wings, too.
Oh, this chicken is
gonna fly, baby. Ooh!
Oh!
No, no, no. Icarus,
putting your egg at risk
is not the kind of responsible
handling I want to see.
Now, Adonis, where's your egg?
Not just an egg. The royal egg.
Ahh. How nice.
And, Hercules?
Oh. Where's Hercules?
Here I am! Whoops!
Wha! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Ooh.
Ah. Oh.
All in one piece.
Hmm. So I see.
And how about you,
Cassandra? How's your...
Egg?
What?
Sweet Zeus! Don't look, Bud!
Why doesn't Hades
just give up on Hercules?
We'll never beat him.
We couldn't even beat
Hercules when he was, like, a kid.
Of course, back then we didn't
know he was freakishly strong.
Yeah. If we did, we
would've taken precautions.
Mmm! Mmm!
These are, these are plump.
You know, it's too bad we can't go
back in time to when Hercules was a baby.
Yeah. Hey!
What if there was a way you could
make Hercules go back in time?
Say, to when he was a baby?
We are all ears.
There is a spring
called Canathus.
Its powers are most wondrous.
Splash once, and
age it will reverse.
Splash twice, and
gone will be the curse.
I don't suppose you know where
this magic spring is. Do you?
Of course we know.
We're the fates!
But I'm afraid
we've said too much.
It's on the dark side of
the Stymphalian swamp.
You can't miss it.
Thank you, ladies.
Shouldn't you have told them
that no one has ever returned
from the Stymphalian swamp?
Mmm... nah.
I never liked those guys.
OK, we got the magic
baby formula. Now let's go.
This place makes my knees knock.
Ah, you baby.
It's kind of scenic.
Well, except for those big eyes.
Eyes?
All right, flap and
rest, flap and rest.
That's it.
And remember, never fly
too close to the sun, son.
Or too close to Cassandra
when she's hungry.
The egg was delicious.
Ooh. Egg salad.
Ah! Don't listen, Bud.
You weren't supposed
to eat your egg.
You were supposed to learn to
be a responsible and caring person.
Hasn't home greconomics
taught you anything?
Sure. It taught me how to
make the perfect omelet.
Besides, that egg baby
project was just ludicrous.
I could be caring... for
someone I care about.
Ahh. Like me?
You'd be an omelet.
Hey, I've been fried before.
Here you go. Free refill.
Oh, thanks.
Oh, Jercules. Thank
you. I am a bit parched.
All right, Adonis.
This has gotta stop.
Uh... Hey, where'd he go?
Well, he probably ran off.
Afraid I might come after him next!
Yeah, nothing but a big baby.
But not as big as
you might think.
You think this cute
little fella's Adonis?
No way.
Jerky! Jerky!
Aah! It's Adonis.
Baby Adonis? I don't get it.
I mean, h-h-how could this...
Something weird is going on.
Oh, come on. So Adonis is
somehow turned into a baby.
Stranger things happen.
Well, OK. No, they
don't. Are you happy?
Ooh. He's wet.
You know, he is
a cute little baby.
Just help me squirt this thing.
Ready, aim, water!
Come on, Pegasus.
We have a crisis here.
Pegasus?
Oh, no!
Adonis!
Ooh-whee!
I'll save him. Watch Pegasus.
This time, wait
for a clear shot.
Oy! Ay!
This is all getting
very confusing.
Hold on, Adonis!
That's not funny, Icarus.
Icarus?
Well, at least you're
finally acting your age.
Wee!
Wee!
Whoa! Whoa!
OK. You're safe. Now
come to uncle Herc.
Jerky! Jerky!
Ow!
Oy!
M-m-mama.
I am not your mother.
Ooh. Mama.
More problems?
Not for me.
I don't need a vision to
see this means trouble.
Unc Jerky! Jerky!
Ga! Ga!
This is not happening.
This is just a bad dream.
I'm not ready to be a
mother. I am so not ready.
♪ La la la la! ♪
Adonis, put that down.
Mmm.
Icarus, put that down!
Hercules, put me down!
And you, stop flying around!
We did it?
We did it!
♪ Hercules is a baby! ♪
Yeah. And now we
can finally finish our job.
He thinks you're a squeeze toy.
- Me! Me!
- Mine! Mine!
Whoa, uh, kids?
Please put that down.
That's not a toy!
Mine! Mine!
Boys?
Where the... What is that?
Give me that.
Hades' little helpers.
I should have known.
Yeah. Careful.
Don't mess with us.
We've got special
underworld powers.
We can turn into anything.
Start talking.
Look, honest.
I don't know anything about a
plan to turn Hercules into a baby
with the magic spring water of
Canathus so that we could do him in
because we messed
up the first time we tried.
Oops.
Adonis, don't
put that in his ear.
You turned them into
babies with magic water?
Great. Well, you've had your
little fun, now turn them back.
Pegasus, don't eat that!
Uh, OK. I'll turn
them back. It's simple.
One squirt, they're a baby, two squirts,
they're back to normal, no problemo.
Small problemo.
It appears we're a bit dry.
So get more.
I don't wanna go back there.
It's too far and creepy.
And they're kind
of cute as babies.
Don't you think?
OK! OK! I'll take you.
Thank you.
But, uh...
don't you think you should
change some diapers first?
We're here, the
Stymphalian swamp.
Good. Because if I have to say,
"don't put that in your mouth"
one more time, I'm gonna scream.
On second thought, I
think I'll scream anyway.
Look, little baby. A bally.
Ball! Ball!
Yeah, that's it.
Get the friendly ball.
Whoo!
Oh, uh, it's a
joke, a silly joke.
A bad silly joke.
Oh. Oh.
Ball!
Ball! Ball!
That's not a ball.
It's a beehive!
Ball! Ball!
Fine. It's a ball.
Bad ball. Don't touch.
OK, where's your magic spring?
Through there,
on the other side.
Can't... can't miss
it. Have a nice trip.
Where do you think you're going?
Diaper run? Heh.
Show a little responsibility.
Do you want your friend
to be a baby forever?
Do I have a choice?
Hey! Stop that!
Whoa!
Can we go now?
And, Hercules, put
down the wagon.
Maybe we can get
him to move that big log.
Oh, never mind.
It's moving itself.
Can logs do that?
What do you think?
Hercules? Where's Hercules?
Wee!
Ball! Ha ha! Ball!
Hurry. Go hide.
Oh, you care about me.
No one ever cares about me, except
Hades, and that's kind of a tough love.
Can we talk about
this some other time?
Come on. This is a breakthrough.
Throw the ball. Throw the ball.
Ew! Heh heh. Ball.
Ball gone.
Yeah, ball gone.
And now I want you
gone. Go on. Scoot.
Whew.
OK. Diapers loaded?
Fire away.
Hey, look, everybody!
Mommy's back!
You know, they are kind of cute.
Aww.
And to think they're
our little brood.
Don't push it.
Um, I think maybe
there's something
I should've mentioned
a little earlier.
What's that?
Well, you know, this is
the Stymphalian swamp,
home of the Stymphalian birds.
The big, big, birds
with the big, big beaks
and the big, big sharp claws.
Yeah. Maybe you
should've mentioned it.
Get away!
Meow.
That's OK, little
partner. I'll handle this.
Now, that's a helpful trick.
The babies!
Graa-hoo!
We did it! We did it!
Is somebody missing?
Oh, no.
My babies!
Did I just say that?
Ugh! Whoa, big egg.
Oh!
I see.
I'm supposed to be the
chick's first solid food.
I should warn you, I lack all the
essential vitamins and minerals
that a healthy
baby needs, and...
Do something! Your
baby's gonna sink!
Right. And you don't swim.
And I've suddenly gotta
become Miss Swamp mom.
Whoa!
Ugh! Hold on, egg. I've got you.
There. You're safe now.
But I'm not.
Mama!
OK, real good.
Hey! What do you
know? There it is!
The spring of Canathus.
OK, who wants
to take a bath first?
Aw, come on. You don't
need a bath just to grow up,
You just need a bath.
Quack, quack. Last
one in is a rotten...
Whoo-hoo! He saved...
Gaa! Help!
It's all right.
Mama.
Yes!
Yes! Ha ha! Way to go, Hercules!
You're my hero.
Panic, um, are you,
uh, feeling, like, normal?
Hey! Why's it taste like
I've been eating worms?
So, how goes Operation
Last Chance? Any results?
And why is everybody
wearing diapers?
Yeesh. Uh, never mind.
This one, I don't wanna know.
I just wanted to tell you...
I think we were a great couple.
OK, maybe Hades doesn't want
to know why we're wearing diapers,
but, uh, I sure do.
Don't worry. I'll explain
it all on the way home.
And you're gonna love this one.
Somehow I find
that hard to believe.
And so, after hearing about
their harrowing infant exploits
and their heroic
rescue by Cassandra,
her friends were quick to
express overwhelming gratitude.
Wow. I don't know what
to say, Cassandra, except,
please never tell anyone
that you changed my diaper!
Please! I'll do your
homework for a year!
I'll carry your
books for 25 miles!
"glad" in gladiator? ♪
♪ Hercules ♪
♪ Whose daring deeds
are great theater? ♪
♪ Hercules ♪
♪ Is he bold? ♪
♪ No one braver ♪
♪ Is he sweet? ♪
♪ Our favorite
flavor, Hercules ♪
- ♪ What a guy ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
- ♪ Ask his friends ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
♪ Honey, they won't lie ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
- ♪ Ah, Hercules ♪
♪ Hercules ♪
- ♪ Come on ♪
- ♪ No one's fool ♪
♪ Now the boy's in school ♪
♪ He's in trainin' ♪
♪ Sun is shinin' ♪
♪ And the nicest guy ♪
♪ No complainin' ♪
♪ He was a no one ♪
♪ Zero, zero, give
him a quick deed ♪
♪ He's our hero ♪
♪ He's the most
likely to succeed ♪
♪ From zero to hero ♪
♪ Herc is a hero ♪
♪ He'll be a hero ♪
Wait and see!
From the beginning,
Hercules was a...
Well, he was a little cutie.
He made you want to
tickle him under the chin
and go goochee-goochee
goo, goochee-goochee-goochee.
Bob, what are you
goochee-goochee-goo-ing about?
Oh, uh, hi, I... Yes, well, I...
I was just about to point out how
heroic Hercules was even as a baby.
Whoa. Being a baby
doesn't take heroics.
Uh-uh. Now, caring for a
baby, honey, that takes heroics.
Midnight feedings, all that
crying. Changing nasty diapers.
All right, all right. I get your point.
But this story is about Hercules.
And as you may remember, he
had it tough right from the start,
when Hades' impish underlings,
Pain and Panic, tried to do him in.
Fortunately, he survived
that vicious attack
to become the brave, bold
hero-in-training we all know and love.
Oh, dear. This is terrible!
All right, come on.
Give me your best shot.
A fire-breathing bull?
You know, you might
have warned me about that.
Sorry.
Well, that should take care
of your Cretan bull problem.
Yeah. Nice going, jerk.
Uh, young man.
Well, I better be
going. I'm... Oh, no!
Whew! It's safe.
Hmm?
Come on, Pegasus,
I'm late for school. Bye!
Bye!
Aah!
He did it again!
Aw, he always
does it again. Gah!
So, boys, how goes
Operation Bull? Good?
Oh, the same as Operation
Dragon, Operation Lion...
Oh, yeah, yeah. Don't forget
Operation Rabid Chicken.
I told you that
one wouldn't work.
OK, here's one.
Operation "last chance."
I want Hercules down
for the count by sunset!
Or guess what? It's
date night down under.
Just you and one
of my old flames!
Ow.
Simmer. Simmer, simmer, class.
Egg check!
Are you all caring for your egg
as if it was your own baby child?
Oh, you betcha.
You call me proud
papa, Miss Euphrosyne.
I even named mine Bud.
Made him some wax wings, too.
Oh, this chicken is
gonna fly, baby. Ooh!
Oh!
No, no, no. Icarus,
putting your egg at risk
is not the kind of responsible
handling I want to see.
Now, Adonis, where's your egg?
Not just an egg. The royal egg.
Ahh. How nice.
And, Hercules?
Oh. Where's Hercules?
Here I am! Whoops!
Wha! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Ooh.
Ah. Oh.
All in one piece.
Hmm. So I see.
And how about you,
Cassandra? How's your...
Egg?
What?
Sweet Zeus! Don't look, Bud!
Why doesn't Hades
just give up on Hercules?
We'll never beat him.
We couldn't even beat
Hercules when he was, like, a kid.
Of course, back then we didn't
know he was freakishly strong.
Yeah. If we did, we
would've taken precautions.
Mmm! Mmm!
These are, these are plump.
You know, it's too bad we can't go
back in time to when Hercules was a baby.
Yeah. Hey!
What if there was a way you could
make Hercules go back in time?
Say, to when he was a baby?
We are all ears.
There is a spring
called Canathus.
Its powers are most wondrous.
Splash once, and
age it will reverse.
Splash twice, and
gone will be the curse.
I don't suppose you know where
this magic spring is. Do you?
Of course we know.
We're the fates!
But I'm afraid
we've said too much.
It's on the dark side of
the Stymphalian swamp.
You can't miss it.
Thank you, ladies.
Shouldn't you have told them
that no one has ever returned
from the Stymphalian swamp?
Mmm... nah.
I never liked those guys.
OK, we got the magic
baby formula. Now let's go.
This place makes my knees knock.
Ah, you baby.
It's kind of scenic.
Well, except for those big eyes.
Eyes?
All right, flap and
rest, flap and rest.
That's it.
And remember, never fly
too close to the sun, son.
Or too close to Cassandra
when she's hungry.
The egg was delicious.
Ooh. Egg salad.
Ah! Don't listen, Bud.
You weren't supposed
to eat your egg.
You were supposed to learn to
be a responsible and caring person.
Hasn't home greconomics
taught you anything?
Sure. It taught me how to
make the perfect omelet.
Besides, that egg baby
project was just ludicrous.
I could be caring... for
someone I care about.
Ahh. Like me?
You'd be an omelet.
Hey, I've been fried before.
Here you go. Free refill.
Oh, thanks.
Oh, Jercules. Thank
you. I am a bit parched.
All right, Adonis.
This has gotta stop.
Uh... Hey, where'd he go?
Well, he probably ran off.
Afraid I might come after him next!
Yeah, nothing but a big baby.
But not as big as
you might think.
You think this cute
little fella's Adonis?
No way.
Jerky! Jerky!
Aah! It's Adonis.
Baby Adonis? I don't get it.
I mean, h-h-how could this...
Something weird is going on.
Oh, come on. So Adonis is
somehow turned into a baby.
Stranger things happen.
Well, OK. No, they
don't. Are you happy?
Ooh. He's wet.
You know, he is
a cute little baby.
Just help me squirt this thing.
Ready, aim, water!
Come on, Pegasus.
We have a crisis here.
Pegasus?
Oh, no!
Adonis!
Ooh-whee!
I'll save him. Watch Pegasus.
This time, wait
for a clear shot.
Oy! Ay!
This is all getting
very confusing.
Hold on, Adonis!
That's not funny, Icarus.
Icarus?
Well, at least you're
finally acting your age.
Wee!
Wee!
Whoa! Whoa!
OK. You're safe. Now
come to uncle Herc.
Jerky! Jerky!
Ow!
Oy!
M-m-mama.
I am not your mother.
Ooh. Mama.
More problems?
Not for me.
I don't need a vision to
see this means trouble.
Unc Jerky! Jerky!
Ga! Ga!
This is not happening.
This is just a bad dream.
I'm not ready to be a
mother. I am so not ready.
♪ La la la la! ♪
Adonis, put that down.
Mmm.
Icarus, put that down!
Hercules, put me down!
And you, stop flying around!
We did it?
We did it!
♪ Hercules is a baby! ♪
Yeah. And now we
can finally finish our job.
He thinks you're a squeeze toy.
- Me! Me!
- Mine! Mine!
Whoa, uh, kids?
Please put that down.
That's not a toy!
Mine! Mine!
Boys?
Where the... What is that?
Give me that.
Hades' little helpers.
I should have known.
Yeah. Careful.
Don't mess with us.
We've got special
underworld powers.
We can turn into anything.
Start talking.
Look, honest.
I don't know anything about a
plan to turn Hercules into a baby
with the magic spring water of
Canathus so that we could do him in
because we messed
up the first time we tried.
Oops.
Adonis, don't
put that in his ear.
You turned them into
babies with magic water?
Great. Well, you've had your
little fun, now turn them back.
Pegasus, don't eat that!
Uh, OK. I'll turn
them back. It's simple.
One squirt, they're a baby, two squirts,
they're back to normal, no problemo.
Small problemo.
It appears we're a bit dry.
So get more.
I don't wanna go back there.
It's too far and creepy.
And they're kind
of cute as babies.
Don't you think?
OK! OK! I'll take you.
Thank you.
But, uh...
don't you think you should
change some diapers first?
We're here, the
Stymphalian swamp.
Good. Because if I have to say,
"don't put that in your mouth"
one more time, I'm gonna scream.
On second thought, I
think I'll scream anyway.
Look, little baby. A bally.
Ball! Ball!
Yeah, that's it.
Get the friendly ball.
Whoo!
Oh, uh, it's a
joke, a silly joke.
A bad silly joke.
Oh. Oh.
Ball!
Ball! Ball!
That's not a ball.
It's a beehive!
Ball! Ball!
Fine. It's a ball.
Bad ball. Don't touch.
OK, where's your magic spring?
Through there,
on the other side.
Can't... can't miss
it. Have a nice trip.
Where do you think you're going?
Diaper run? Heh.
Show a little responsibility.
Do you want your friend
to be a baby forever?
Do I have a choice?
Hey! Stop that!
Whoa!
Can we go now?
And, Hercules, put
down the wagon.
Maybe we can get
him to move that big log.
Oh, never mind.
It's moving itself.
Can logs do that?
What do you think?
Hercules? Where's Hercules?
Wee!
Ball! Ha ha! Ball!
Hurry. Go hide.
Oh, you care about me.
No one ever cares about me, except
Hades, and that's kind of a tough love.
Can we talk about
this some other time?
Come on. This is a breakthrough.
Throw the ball. Throw the ball.
Ew! Heh heh. Ball.
Ball gone.
Yeah, ball gone.
And now I want you
gone. Go on. Scoot.
Whew.
OK. Diapers loaded?
Fire away.
Hey, look, everybody!
Mommy's back!
You know, they are kind of cute.
Aww.
And to think they're
our little brood.
Don't push it.
Um, I think maybe
there's something
I should've mentioned
a little earlier.
What's that?
Well, you know, this is
the Stymphalian swamp,
home of the Stymphalian birds.
The big, big, birds
with the big, big beaks
and the big, big sharp claws.
Yeah. Maybe you
should've mentioned it.
Get away!
Meow.
That's OK, little
partner. I'll handle this.
Now, that's a helpful trick.
The babies!
Graa-hoo!
We did it! We did it!
Is somebody missing?
Oh, no.
My babies!
Did I just say that?
Ugh! Whoa, big egg.
Oh!
I see.
I'm supposed to be the
chick's first solid food.
I should warn you, I lack all the
essential vitamins and minerals
that a healthy
baby needs, and...
Do something! Your
baby's gonna sink!
Right. And you don't swim.
And I've suddenly gotta
become Miss Swamp mom.
Whoa!
Ugh! Hold on, egg. I've got you.
There. You're safe now.
But I'm not.
Mama!
OK, real good.
Hey! What do you
know? There it is!
The spring of Canathus.
OK, who wants
to take a bath first?
Aw, come on. You don't
need a bath just to grow up,
You just need a bath.
Quack, quack. Last
one in is a rotten...
Whoo-hoo! He saved...
Gaa! Help!
It's all right.
Mama.
Yes!
Yes! Ha ha! Way to go, Hercules!
You're my hero.
Panic, um, are you,
uh, feeling, like, normal?
Hey! Why's it taste like
I've been eating worms?
So, how goes Operation
Last Chance? Any results?
And why is everybody
wearing diapers?
Yeesh. Uh, never mind.
This one, I don't wanna know.
I just wanted to tell you...
I think we were a great couple.
OK, maybe Hades doesn't want
to know why we're wearing diapers,
but, uh, I sure do.
Don't worry. I'll explain
it all on the way home.
And you're gonna love this one.
Somehow I find
that hard to believe.
And so, after hearing about
their harrowing infant exploits
and their heroic
rescue by Cassandra,
her friends were quick to
express overwhelming gratitude.
Wow. I don't know what
to say, Cassandra, except,
please never tell anyone
that you changed my diaper!
Please! I'll do your
homework for a year!
I'll carry your
books for 25 miles!