Hart of Dixie (2011–2015): Season 3, Episode 1 - Who Says You Can't Go Home - full transcript

You can't just say you
have feelings for George

and then say,
"Oops, never mind!"

Hey, I am very, very sorry!

I can't be in the
same place as Zoe Hart.

If you really do think
we belong together,

you will start over with me,

someplace else.
WANDA: Tansy left

last night.
Like "left George Tucker" left?

I'd say that's a good bet.

Being rational is
kind of overrated.

Are we getting married?
Uh-huh.



LEMON: You and AnnaBeth
seem right together.

It inspires me to find
the right person, too.

I'm going on tour tomorrow,

and I could use an extra voice
on the road.

Where are we going?
Not we, me. New York.

(tires screech)
WADE: You were right.

Look, I have changed!

Which is why
I'm going after her.

I came all this way
to tell you that...

I love you.

Wow.

I was kind of hoping
for more than a "wow."

I'm gonna spend the summer
in New York.

I'll see you
in three months, Doc.



(crowd cheering,
band playing upbeat march)

Dr. Hart!

Where are you?!

(distorted):
Come back!

(cheering fades)

WOMAN:
Wake up.

Wake up.

Nap's over, lazy ass.

You got rounds.

(indistinct chatter)

ZOE:
Run a chem seven, CBC.

Mrs. Abrams, room 82,
needs an echo.

Get Ms. Rami in bed 11 in for
a double bypass this afternoon.

Mr. Diamond in room 43,
he can be released

only if he promises to get his
pacemaker checked in two weeks.

You can tell his daughter
because she'll remind...

Meatball?

What?

Sorry.

I was just listing
my favorite sandwiches.

(groans softly)

Lemon?

MAN:
Hey.

Hi, honey.

Joel, what are you doing here?

Well,

I had the worst
writer's block ever.

Needed an ego boost, so I
loitered in the fiction section

of the Strand until
someone recognized me.

I have issues.

Don't judge.

Me? Judge.
(scoffs)

I'm swimming in issues.

(chuckles)

JOEL:
Beet salad with celery root,

grilled fennel and...

cold poached salmon.
What?

This is so sweet.

But what is the occasion?

Oh, they accepted our offer
on the apartment.

No way!

All that's left is to be
approved by the co-op board.

We meet them
Friday at 9:00 a.m.

I cannot believe this.

That is my dream apartment.

Yes!

Shmancy novelist.
Semi-shmancy surgeon.

We are going to breeze
past that co-op board.

Uh, actually, uh,
your former business partner...

Dr. Breemore?

Breeland. Brick.

Brick. Right. Still hilarious.

He hasn't sent in his reference
letter the board asked for.

Are you sure you asked him for it?
Yeah.

No, I wrote it all up for him.
All he had to do was sign it.

I overnighted it
to him weeks ago.

Why didn't he do it? Did you
leave on bad terms or something?

I left on good terms
with everyone.

Rose?

Is that you? Is that really you?

Duh. And it was really me
when you pretended

you didn't know me
five minutes ago.

Okay. I know how that may
have looked, but...

Remember how you promised

we'd spend my 16th birthday
in New York?

Well, my 16th birthday
was yesterday.

So I had to come here with
the model U.N. field trip.

I'm Egypt.

And my stupid, idiot classmates
got into a food fight,

so now I'm starting my 16th
year in some New York hospital

babysitting Finland while
he gets a French fry removed

from his sinus passages.

Well, how long are you in town?

Maybe I can take you
to lunch tomorrow.

Barney's! A belated celebration!

Happy birthday!

Don't pretend
that you care about me.

You don't care about any of us.

I do care.

Really? Is that
why you told

everyone you were leaving
forever in an e-mail?

You know what?

Good-bye, Dr. Hart.
See you never.

Rose, come...

(sighs)

Individual e-mails.

Minimal cutting and pasting.

(sighs)

You know, it's just... it's so
hard for me to say good-bye.

Zoe, I know you've been having
weird dreams, anxiety.

Maybe you should go back
to BlueBell.

Tie up loose ends,
make things right.

Get that very important
reference letter signed.

Joel, things in BlueBell
are... complicated.

There's stuff that I haven't
fully told you.

Yeah, and I want
to know everything.

But we have time.

You know,

maybe before we start
our new life,

you should put the old one
to bed.

(sighs)

Yeah. Maybe
you're right.

Go.

Enjoy yourself.
Take a few days.

Just be back
Friday morning by 9:00.

Of course.
Mm.

Pinky promise.

Mm, pinky promise.

(both chuckle)

♪

Hello?!

Where'd everyone go?

WADE:
They're in the church.

Town meeting.

Hello, Doc.

Hi, Wade.

It's nice to see you.

Figured you'd be back.
Hi, Wade.

Actually, um, I'm-I'm just here
for the night, so...

Well, I'm guessing I'm...

probably not the first person
you were hoping to run into.

I just...

I know that-that you...

are probably angry at me,
and-and I should explain.

No.

No need to explain.

I don't have any regrets.

As for the rest of the people
in this town, I can't say

they were as charmed
by your cyber adioses as I was.

Well, that's why I'm here:
to smooth all that over.

Good luck with that, Doc.

(sighs)

Unfortunately, it is true.

Fillmore has issued a preemptive
noise ordinance against us.

(crowd groaning)
(clears throat)

Now, now, unless we can get it
overturned by tomorrow,

the Founder's Day parade
is canceled.

(crowd murmuring, groaning)
Say what?

Mayor Hayes, now, this parade
has been going on now

for 250 years.

How could this be?

Mayor Todd Gainey Sr. and
that crooked ambulance chaser,

Scooter McGreevey, is how.

JEFFRIES:
I was a take a date,

and she was hot to trot.

If George Tucker were here,
this never would have happened.

Look, look, everybody
just calm down.

Huh? Reverend,
I'm-I'm sure you have

some words of wisdom.

We could pray.

Let us bow our heads

in a moment
of silent reflection.

(door creaks open)

Hello, everyone!

I'm back!

(cricket chirping)

I brought bagels.

(car horn honks)

(seagulls calling)

Lavon.
(chuckles)

Please tell me
that you don't hate me.

What? What? No. Never.

(grunts, chuckles)

Why didn't you tell
me you were coming?

It was all just
kind of last minute.

I've been thinking
about this place,

and-and I wanted
to end things right.

Plus, I need Brick to sign
this reference letter.

So you're really staying
in New York, huh?

I mean, you know, uh,

I got your e-mail,

but somehow I didn't think
it was gonna stick.

I know.

I'm sorry about the e-mail.
I-I should have called.

But, come on, let's face it.

You know, BlueBell was like

just a rest stop
on the way to reality.

(chuckles)

I met someone.

Someone that I can see spending
the rest of my life with.

(laughs) That's great news.

I know things here were...

Tumultuous? Trying? Triangular?

All of the above.
(chuckles)

I'm happy for you.
Thank you.

Mayor Hayes, no big deal--
the town's going down in flames,

but by all means, keep gossiping
like a beauty parlor lady.

Sorry, Z, I got to go.

I'm-I'm glad you're here.

Um, yeah,
you-you should know, um,

I sublet the carriage house
to my cousin Lynly.

Oh. Yeah, no, I didn't expect...

I'll just stay at the B&B.

Okay. Bye.

Bye.

Dash.

Guess what. I'm
gonna check in

to the Whippoorwill Blossom,
so we are gonna have

so much time to catch up.

All of my rooms are filled up
with guests for the parade.

And I wouldn't want you
to have one anyway.

(scoffs)

You know, in New York,

a gesture of fresh bagels
means something!

We need to discuss
our options for the parade

in case we can't make noise.

So I say

we all learn to sing "Dixie"
in sign language.

(chuckles)
Where is Lemon?

Outside, on the phone
with her secret boyfriend.

Lemon doesn't have
a secret boyfriend.

We'd know.
Really?

She's on the phone
all the time, whispering.

She's got a spring in her step.

I am positive our little Lemon
is getting herself squeezed.

(laughter)

Hey, all you Belles!

Zoe Hart.

It is so good
to see you all again.

You look just the same.

Any of you have a spare room?

Perchance a guesthouse?

Welcome back,
but no one likes you anymore.

Oh.

You can stay with us.

Ow. Ow.

Oh, but Wanda feels

your leaving was a
personal betrayal

and has vowed never to let
you darken her doorstep again.

And since I am married to her,
you can't stay with me.

I retract.

I don't get it.

Why is everyone this mad?

I moved. People are allowed
to move, right?

Yeah.

Uh, I think it might be because
you ruined all our lives.

That is most certainly
the reason.

Wait. I did what?!

See, when you told George Tucker

that you loved him,
it chased Tansy out of town.

And, uh, sad George went on the
road with Lily Ann Lonnergan.

No one's heard from him since.

He's MIA.
What?

Oh. Missing In Action.

Anyway, uh, just to mess
with us, Scooter McGreevy

took advantage
of George's absence

and had the people of Fillmore
sue half this town.

Lavon had to pull
our old town lawyer,

Old Man Bryant,
out of retirement.

And he keeps falling asleep
in court.

Anyway, it was nice to see you.

I mean, screw you, Zoe Hart!

(door bells jingle)

Okay, this cannot happen again.

It has all just been
a dreadful mistake.

I-I mean, I'm just...
I'm not seeing clearly

due to the stress
of the Founder's Day debacle.

Yes, yes, yes, you are
a very good stress relief.

Which is why... I'm just not
gonna get stressed anymore.

Okay? Good-bye.

(sighs)

Please tell me

that you are the identical
twin cousin of Zoe Hart,

and not the Zoe Hart I've
been assured is not returning.

Oh, I'm not returning.
I'm just visiting.

And please, for
the love of God,

tell me that you are no longer
involved with my cousin.

Oh, no. Jonah and I had brief...

But it is long, long over.
Very over.

Good. Well, then I
continue to hate you.

And here I was afraid
that everything had changed.

Nice to see you, Lemon.

(sighs)

Meet me in my place in an hour.

BRICK:
Old Man Bryant, get up!

Come on, get up,
you stubborn old coot. Get up!

Oh, where am I?

Who are you?
Yeah.

Yeah, I was just gonna...

(snoring)

Oh, please, please
let my eyes be deceiving me.

Let this be a stroke and not...

Brick Breeland, you look great!

Have you been working out?

Not you. You... you are
supposed to be gone.

This-this practice
is mine now.

I have the e-mail
to prove it.

Of course it is.

I am just here to visit,
to see how you are.

How's Magnolia?

How's the old golf game, huh?

Did you get
that reference letter I sent?

I do not sign my name
to false statements, young lady.

And you most certainly were not
a role model to this community.

And Founder's Day used
to be my favorite holiday!

Brick, come on,
I really need this.

No.

Your-your narcolepsy patient--
I can help.

The sleep clinic at
my hospital-- they've done some

groundbreaking stu...
No! Come on, one foot

in front of the other.

You, go.
Go, go, go! Shoo!

Come on, Brick.
Come on.

ANNABETH:
I wouldn't take anything

he says personally.

A.B.! You work here now?

Give me some sugar, Zoe.

And you don't hate me?
(laughs)

BRICK:
Wake up old man!

(door slams)
Ooh!

Brick seems crabbier
and meaner than usual.

Been like this for months.

He and Shelby were gonna elope,

but he broke up
with her instead,

which he obviously regrets.

His moping
made Magnolia so crazy

that Lemon convinced him
to send her to boarding school.

So, I stepped in to stop him
from killing the patients.

It was the Christian
thing to do.

But you and Lavon--
you guys are still good?

We are. His cousin...

(door opens)
Lynly!

AnnaBeth!
You look beautiful.

Oh, h-have you met Zoe Hart?

I've heard so much

about you, and
love you already.

Thanks for all the remodeling
you did to the carriage house.

It's to die.
Thanks.

Anyways, AnnaBeth,
huge-normous news.

I'm gluten free now!

Oh. I was gonna make
a lasagna tonight.

My favorite!
You're so sweet.

Just do that gluten free.

Thanks! Coffee soon?

That's Little Lynly?

The only thing little
about her anymore

is her regard for my time.

(door opens, Brick groans)
I'll see you.

(snoring continues)

Hey, Brick, looks like your
patient's still asleep.

Not gonna be so
helpful in court.

All, right, fine, big shot.

You go ahead, you work
your New York doctor magic.

Thank you, sir, for
the opportunity.

Terrible news.

Brace yourself.

Zoe Hart is back.

Well, don't blow
a gasket, Lemon.

She leaves town tomorrow.

Well, it's not my gasket
that I'm worried about.

Are you okay?

Yeah.
Wait.

You don't have to
pretend with me.

I'm the only one who knows what
you said to Zoe before she left,

and I'm the only one who knows

what her little e-mail
did to your heart.

Lemon, I am fine,
all right? Fine.

Don't look so... worried.

(snoring)

(snapping fingers)

Oh, snapping your fingers.
How innovative.

Wow, the wonders
of modern medicine. Hold on.

I want... I want to record this
for the medical journals.

Okay, maybe I don't know any
new techniques for narcolepsy.

Uh-huh.
What can I do to make this better?

I-I will do anything.

You find George Tucker,

you get him to that hearing
at 3:00 tomorrow,

and-and I will sign
your-your blessed letter.

A challenge. I accept.

Consider George found.

I know people who know people.

(snorting)

ZOE: My mother is nothing
but a disappointment.

No, she wouldn't call
the NSA for me.

I just wanted
to know all the people

George Tucker had called
and e-mailed.

Yeah, but don't worry, Joel.

I am going to stay up all night
brainstorming ways to find him.

(TV playing loudly)

But first, I have to get
these stupid neighbors

to turn down their stupid
television so I can concentrate!

Okay, look, I love you.
I got to go.

I'll talk to you later. Bye.

Turn that down!

(TV continues playing loudly)

Ugh!

(TV playing loudly)

I said, turn that down!

George?

Wow. I'm really good
at finding people.

Of course you'll think of
some way to save that parade.

You're Lavon Hayes.

You can do anything.

(chuckles):
Oh.

And you are the sweetest little
cousin in the whole wide world.

What is this?

Gluten-free blueberry muffins.

Why?

Morning, y'all.

Hi, Wade!

I like your shirt.

Thank you.

It's, uh...
it's an oldie, but a goodie.

Wade. (clears throat)
A word?

Yeah.

Little Lynly is nursing
a broken heart.

Now, if you so much
as flirt with her,

I will remove
your arms, your legs,

and you will have a hard time
relieving yourself.

You're adorable, Papa Bear,
,but no worries, all right?

I'm doing fine with the ladies,

so no need to seduce
the ones I live with.

Got me in enough
trouble before.

Oh. Yeah.

Yeah.

All right.

(coughs)

What is this?

Those muffins
really are terrible.

Well, yes, they are made
without flour.

And that lasagna last night--
whew, that was a stinker, too.

(laughs)

You try making
noodles out of kale.

Sweetheart,
don't get so defensive.

Not everyone is a natural
in the kitchen.

I used to have
my own catering company!

She is so cute!

Yeah, I know, huh?

Hey.

Why did I know
you couldn't stay away?

I need a favor.

Oh, Doc, you know,
I know you're on your vacay,

but you should know.

See, this--
it's not gonna happen.

That ship has sailed, sister.

Yeah, SS Wade Kinsella
has left port.

Accept it.

Okay, I need a favor.

Lemon?
No.

Lemon, I found George Tucker,

I tried to talk
to him all night,

but he will not let me
into his motel room.

That is because
you are the devil,

and George Tucker
is smart enough to know that.

Now, where is he?

(sighs)

Up, up, up.

You need to save
Founder's Day in four hour

and, right now,
you look like Joaquin Phoenix.

Lemon, go away.

I'm not going to court, okay?

I'm not up to it.
I'm not up to anything.

Oh, really, how bad
can things be?

Bad.

Like, bad, like so...

so bad. Hey!

(sighs)

Worse than when you lost
your first trial?

Worse than your dad's
50th birthday party?

Go away.
Tell me.

I mean, you went on tour
with Lily Ann Lonnergan.

I mean, that must have
been fun, right?

And that song
that you wrote about Zoe Hart

was, like, a bit of a hit
on local radio.

I mean, it was...
it was catchy.

George?

Talk.

Okay, fine.

Yeah, being on the road was...

It was fun for a little while,

but about a month
ago, I realized

that I was...
I was done.

Okay, I wanted to go
back to BlueBell,

and I wanted to settle down.

And I realized that I
wanted to do it with Tansy.

No offense.

Uh, I think it's safe to say
that we've moved past that.

But, apparently, she'd heard
that little hit song of mine,

which was based solely on all
the pain that Zoe had caused me,

which did nothing but...

confirm Tansy's suspicions.

And... well,
instead of

taking me into her arms,
she slapped me in the face.

Okay, that is bad.

But, George, you cannot
sit around in your pajamas

watching television
for the rest of your life.

Yeah, I can.
See, this show--

this is called
Don Todd's Monster Golf Safari.

Don Todd coming to you
from the Big Island of Hawaii.

Or as the locals pronounce it,
"Hawai'i."

Every week, he sinks a shot

from one of the world's
most dangerous locations.

Just this morning,

he sunk a putt from the top
of an active volcano.

I actually really
like this show.

While that does sound
fascinating... (chuckles)

George, what you love
is the law.

And what you love is BlueBell.

Eh. I'm over 'em.

Both of 'em.

Okay, George...

I know you.

And you know me.

So what is secretly
my favorite movie?

Any movie
with a training montage.

♪

♪

TOM: Here comes another
update on Dash's blog!

George looks really confident.

The prosecution looks nervous.

Dash says George is killing it!

(crowd cheering)

He just finished
his closing arguments.

George says...

ZOE:
Hey, Shula.

Oh, Zoe.

I hope you're being careful

picking up
Mr. Whiskers.

You don't want to throw
out your back again.

Well, actually, I put
Mr. Whiskers on a diet.

You want to see a picture?

Of course I do.
Okay.

You just stay away
from my patients,

or I'll get
a restraining order.

ROSE:
Don't you yell at her.

George is winning in court,

and she's the one who found him.

What?

We won!

The parade's back on!

(crowd cheering)

Oh, you saved the parade!

Well, no. Not technically.

Oh, thank you, Zoe.

Next haircut's on me.

(chuckles)
Thank you!

If Tom and I get alpacas,
I'm naming one after you.

Sorry about before.

I just... missed you.

I missed you, too, Wanda.

I missed all of you guys a lot,

and I promise that
I will be better

about staying in touch.

Quit milking it.

I will sign
that co-op board letter.

Now, come on.

Oh. Thanks.

Joel, I can assure you
I'm not gonna miss my flight.

The-the airport is the size
of a living room.

Security-- it's no big deal.

I promise, I'm not gonna...

Hey, pretty doctor,
I cut my finger

the other day, and I got
this thing on my arm.

I-I'll call you
from the plane, okay?

All right, bye.

Right.

Earl, I'm not gonna fall
for Wade's attempt

to get me to miss
my flight back home.

You don't live here anymore?

Didn't Wade tell you
that I left?

No.

You should see Dr. Breeland.

I'd rather cut my arm off than
see that jerk Brick Breeland.

Anyhow, pretty doctor,
you're family.

Show me.

(sighs):
Oh, Earl.

(exhales)

(clears throat)

Hey, something's come up.

I'm not gonna make that flight.

(sighs)

Aren't you supposed
to be on a plane?

What's the, uh,
big "emergency"?

Your dad's here.

Hi, son.

Come to see your girlfriend?

He has blood poisoning.

It's headed up his arm
towards his heart.

I've already given him
a shot of antibiotics,

but we need to get him
to the hospital.

Negative. I do not go
to hospitals.

No way, Josita.

Dad, don't be an idiot.
Come on. Let's go.

You go.

Pick me up some Jell-O.

Earl, this is serious. If that
poison reaches your heart...

I would rather die here
with my son

and my future daughter-in-law
by my side.

You can plan your wedding
to coincide with my funeral.

(sighs)

Fine.

The poison...

is here.

I need to monitor it for
the next eight hours,

every 20 minutes,
to make sure it doesn't rise.

You go. I got it.

Uh...

my boy would never abandon me
at a time like this.

Looks like we're gonna be
pulling an all-nighter.

Think of all the catching up
we can do.

We'll take shifts.

I'll monitor him first.
You go sleep.

Doc, it's 9:15.

Then go for a walk.

(sighs)

Damn! Again?

Hey!
(chuckles)

Lemon, let me help.
Oh, thanks.

Mm-hmm.
What are you doing here so late?

(groans) Avoiding Lynly.
She's driving me up a wall.

Lavon and I can never...

Uh, I shouldn't be complaining.

Oh, no, it's fine.

Lemon, listen, um...

is it just me
or are things a little...

weird between us?

Weird? No, things are not weird.

Yes, they are.

(quietly): Everyone knows
you're sleeping with someone,

and everyone expects
that I know who it is.

And I don't!
Your best friend!

(quietly):
Oh, shh! Okay. Fine.

I am sleeping with someone.

But I can't tell you who
because...

it is shameful.

Well, if it's so shameful,

maybe you should stop
sleeping with him.

It is a him, right?

(chuckles)

I'll see you later.

(sighs)

Gosh, Meatball, watch
where you're going!

(sighs)

Meet me at my place in an hour.

Yeah, guys, I'm gonna have
to skip bowling tonight.

Really, Meat, again?
Weak.

(birds chirping)

Hey.

Hey.

(sighing)

The line's receded.
He's gonna be fine.

(grunts)

I'll, uh...
I'll take him home.

Come here.

Look, Wade, I feel like
I owe you an explanation.

Honestly,
after all this time, Doc,

I mean, what's the point, right?

What you said to me before
I left, it meant something.

And I thought about it a lot
when I first got there.

But then it's like real life
just took over.

"Real life"?

Yeah, being back in New York,

it-it reminded me of who I was.

You know, who I've always been.

Things, they're just
easier there.

It doesn't mean
that it's not nice to see you.

Doc, it's all good.
You know, I just...

wish you good luck
in New York and...

you know,
with the rest of your life.

I hope you're happy.

I hope you're happy, too.

(door opens, Brick groans)

I knew you just couldn't keep
your nose out of my business.

Uh, Brick, it's-it's 6:00 a.m.
What are you doing here?

Well, I found your friend
wandering around the street.

And I said, "You know,
I know the one place

where she is not allowed to be
is in my doctor's office."

And that's why
I brought him here first.

What? I'm sorry.
Brought-brought who here?

(chuckles): Hey.
Joel!

JOEL:
Sorry.

Hi. Hi.
Hi.

(chuckles):
Oh, my God! Wow!

Th-That's Brick. You met Brick.

Mm-hmm.
This... That's Wade.

He used to be my neighbor.
Oh.

(chuckles)

Hey, pal. How you doing?

How are you? Good.
Good. Yeah.

Wow, uh, this place is trippier
than I ever imagined.

It is 6:00 a.m.

Are you aware that there are
ladies in period costume

waltzing around town square?

(Zoe and Joel chuckle)

Hi.
Hi.

I'm-I'm so sorry
that I missed the co-op meeting.

Are you sure you're not mad
about losing the apartment?

Eh, we'll find another place.

It is just both so surreal
and so amazing

that you are here in Alabama.

Well, how could I
miss Founder's Day?

(laughs)
Hello.

Rose is so happy.

Thank you.

And thank you for being here.

So, um... why don't you tell
me about Founder's Day.

'Cause it sounds kind of dirty.

Oh. Yeah. It definitely is.

Oh.

Are you ready?
Yeah, yeah.

A long, long time ago...

.***

...a rugged pioneer named...

Mmm.

Cyrus... Lavinius...

Jeremiah...
Mm-hmm.

...Jones...

BRICK:
Thank you.

Hey, Lemonade!
Oh, hi, Daddy.

Sugar, I think you got
your dress on inside out.

Are you okay?

(sighs)

No.

Hi, Lynly.

Um, where's Lavon?

Went to set up for the parade.

Oh.

I'll just meet him there.

I'm glad you're here.

I've decided to give up
all food with food dye,

and I need to go
through Lavon's pantry and...

Lynly, I was thinking
we could talk,

you know, about your
plans. (chuckles)

Are you planning on leaving
anytime soon?

Oh, my God, you're trying
to get rid of me, aren't you?

No! I was just wondering...

I can't believe this.

You're just like my parents,

just like
my ex-boyfriend.

What is wrong with me?
Why does everyone hate me?

Tansy?

George.

I thought... I heard you
weren't back in town.

I wouldn't have...
Oh, no, it's fine.

It's-it's great,
actually. Um...

How are you?

Good. Really good.

Good. Good.
Are you in town for the parade?

'Cause, I mean, if you are,

maybe we could go get a...
a cup of coffee?

Oh. You should know.

George, I'm with someone.

Actually, I think
you might know him.

Who?

Scott... Scooter McGreevy.

As in...

as in, Fillmore's attorney?

As in, the man
with 48 active lawsuits

against the town of BlueBell?

That Scooter McGreevy?

Tansy, no.

(laughs)

I mean, just... no.

(laughs)

You Yoke care, George.

What's the matter, sunshine?

Want to know?

'Cause I have to tell someone,
or I'm gonna explode.

I can't stop having sex
with Meatball.

With Meatball, or a meatball?

'Cause I don't know
which is worse.

I wanted
to find a suitable mate,

and I spent the whole summer
searching, and then I just fell

into his meaty...

No! Stop, please!

This is not

how I foresaw my life.

Yeah, well,
join the club, sister.

(clears throat)
Zoe's got a boyfriend.

Seems like a decent enough guy.

No.

Zoe Hart does not get to have

a real boyfriend
when I am sleeping with someone

named after his resemblance
to a side order.

She does not get
to break your heart

and then waltz off
into the sunset.

Lemon, it's not a big deal,
all right?

She's gonna be gone by tonight.

Uh-oh.

(hammering, crowd chattering)

Are you sure
you're gonna be okay?

Are you kidding me?

I'm so excited for this!

Okay, well,
go find a good spot--

not next to Frank-- and be sure
to use your bug spray.

All right. (chuckles)

Hey.
Hi.

I heard you were leaving today.

I just want to say,
no hard feelings.

I wish you well.

Was that your new boyfriend?

Oh, yeah. His name is Joel.

Oh. (laughs)
That's a relief.

Makes the whole thing
that much less awkward.

What whole thing?
You know.

That Wade has
a new girlfriend, too.

Well, it's been five months.

Of course Wade was gonna
go back to being Wade.

No, he's not with another bimbo,
if that's what you're implying.

He hasn't just been
mooning around,

waiting for you to come back.

He's with someone real,

someone... wonderful.

In BlueBell?

Seriously? Who?

Me!

(laughs)

That's right.

Wade Kinsella and I
are... in love.

Well, have a safe trip back.

Mm-hmm.

(scoffs)

(crowd cheering,
band playing upbeat march)

You have to admit, this is fun.

Here you go, Francesca.

All right.

Okay, you don't have
to thank me,

but thanks to me, you won.

Ooh, I won? What did I win?

You won the breakup contest.

I told Zoe Hart that you have

an amazing new girlfriend-- me!

Please tell me you didn't.

Oh, I did. Now,
she'll go home thinking

that you moved on
more than she has.

You're welcome!

Lemon Breeland,
you are certifiably insane.

You need a 12-step program
for shenanigans addicts.

But I appreciate
the thought, all right?

(laughs)

(crowd chattering)

Popcorn!

WOMAN:
Hi, Dr. Hart!

So, I guess this is it.

Well...

I just want to posit one thing.

Now, what if BlueBell is real,
and New York is the rest stop?

Lavon.
Well, now, now.

You can't deny these
last two years have changed you,

affected you.

You met Lavon Hayes,
best friend you ever had.

Nah.
Oh!

Look, I-I know things got hard.

But you can't move away forever
just because New York is easier.

No, you-you should only
move away forever

if... if you're still
a New Yorker.

Well, I am...
still a New Yorker.

You know, the first time
you rode on that float,

you were like a fish
out of water, but today...

(laughs)

Zoe Hart, today,
you swam with the best of us.

WALLY:
Hey, girl, where you been?

Ooh, look at you!

You look better than a month

full of Sunday.

Oh...
I'm telling you. Look at you.

I-I wanted to call you anyway.

You know, my sugar's up,
but my pressure's down.

You been good?

Yeah, how your people doing?

Look at you.

Where you get them
shoes at, girl?

I know you ain't
get them in BlueBell.

Them ain't BlueBell shoes.
Them someplace else.

You got another pair
in size 15?

(door closes)

Hey. Whoa, was that
parade amazing?!

You totally didn't
do it justice.

That was pretty great, huh?

Except, I'm-I'm covered
in mosquito bites,

and my legs are chafed
from the humidity.

And that guy
at the store--

he got so mad when I asked for
a copy of The New York Times.

I mean, I cannot
wait to go home.

Oh, you should probably
finish packing your stuff.

I know we have, like, four hours
until the flight, but I...

You know, I get neurotic about
airports, and, you know.

(sighs)

Joel, you know that
I love you, right?

Yeah, of course I do.

And I know that I promised you
a life in New York,

but the thing is,
despite myself,

this place,
with its stupid parades,

and fried foods and mosquitoes--

this place-- it's...

it's where I belong.

I know, I-I have been

trying to fight it, but...

somehow... it is.

I know this is so much to ask,

and it is crazy stupid for me

to even be asking you this,

but you've always said that, um,

you just need
a really good writing spot,

and you could live... anywhere.

Uh, excuse me.

Can I get another
very large drink

capable of erasing
two years of pain?

Thank you.

Can I join you?

Uh... sure.

Uh, but I-I must warn you,

I may be a little drunk,
and terrible company.

Um, what's your name?

I don't want to exchange names,
or problems.

Other people's problems
are so boring.

I think we should take these
drinks back to your place.

And hang out,

and do some stuff.

Some not-boring stuff.

(tapping glass)

Could I have everybody's
attention?

(crowd chatter stops)

Let's raise our glasses...

to Cyrus Lavinius
Jeremiah Jones.

ALL: To Cyrus Lavinius
Jeremiah Jones!

To all the citizens of BlueBell,

Happy Founder's Day.

(crowd cheering)

(laughs)

So, I see you're
not on your plane.

I'm staying.

(laughs)

Oh, but not alone.

Lavon, this is
my boyfriend, Joel.

Welcome to our little town,
Joel.

Oh, thanks, thanks.

Yeah, I thought I'd
give BlueBell a try.

You know, for this girl,
I'd live in Jersey.

Well, Metaphorical
New Jersey, to be clear.

Not that this place is
anything like New Jersey.

I just... You know,
I loved the parade.

Why is she still here?

(sighs)

You know, I'm gonna get us
some beers.

No, I'll do it.
Okay.

What happened?

Aren't you supposed
to be on a plane?

I'm staying, and I know
that you knew that I would.

Hmm. And, uh, Joel?

He's staying, too.

I hope that you can be okay
with it.

But don't worry.

Lemon told me about you guys.

And as weird as it is for me to
wrap my brain around the idea,

I'm gonna try
to be okay with it, too.

Look, Zoe, about Lemon...

It's, um...

Well...

looks like we'll be living
happily ever after.

(laughs)
Right, sweetie?

Yes.
(laughs)

Hey, hon, uh, is it all right
if we go back to the motel?

All this fried food
is not sitting well.

Yeah, let's get you to bed.

All right.
All right.

Zoe?