Hamster & Gretel (2022–…): Season 1, Episode 2 - Recipe for Disaster/Math Punch - full transcript
Kevin and Gretel have to rescue family dinner night/Gretel faces off against a lightning powered cowboy as Dave struggles to get Carolina the perfect anniversary gift.
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)
Okay, let's hose her down.
We've got no water
pressure, Chief.
It's because of that
broken water main
over at the park.
No water pressure?
It's gonna blow.
It's a good thing
it's been evacuated
because it would take a miracle
to put this fire out now.
Look, Chief. It's
Hamster and Gretel.
A miracle.
Okay, the water
pressure is too low.
So we're gonna need to take the
water from that tower up there.
Use this hose.
You're gonna need to find
the water relief valve
on the base of the
tank and attach...
Uh, too complicated.
I'm just gonna punch it.
Wait, that's not... Gretel.
Stop! Stop! Stop!
Relax. I got this.
Water Tower Punch!
Uh-oh.
Woo-hoo.
Wow, young man. You
almost got drenched.
Yeah, that was close.
You should have seen... Ahh!
Chief, I got word from downtown.
They fixed the water pressure.
Looks like everything
turned out just fine.
Oh, great. My GPS
just went out.
Weird. And why do I
always end up wet?
You know we can go home and
get you a change of clothes.
No, we left the
picnic an hour ago.
Everyone's going
to get suspicious.
You worry too much.
Look, Gretel. You've got to take
my instructions more seriously.
One day there's going to be a
problem you can't fix with a punch.
You've got to learn to
roll with the punches.
See what I did there.
'Cause I fixed it with
the punch. I get it.
We got the napkins.
Hi, mi amore. Thank you.
I was just about to
send out a search party.
Well, the first store was out,
so we had to drive
around a little.
And why are your clothes wet?
Oh, that? It's... It's, uh...
Oh, let the boy be.
He's a sweat piece,
just like his old man.
Sweat proud, son.
Will do. Where's Bailey?
She's waiting for you over
by that tree you like.
Oakey!
Yep. They name the tree.
(GIGGLES) I heard on Dad's radio
that Hamster and Gretel were
in this actual park yesterday.
No way. Yes way.
They saved the kitten from a well
over by that silly clown statue.
Can you imagine?
If we'd have been up here on
Oakey, we might have seen them.
Remember the
kindergarten field trip?
That's when you and
I became best friends
on that branch right
there. And look at us now.
The queens of the tree.
BOTH: The queens of the tree!
Oakey is always going
to be here for us.
Yeah, just like our friendship.
MAN: What's been going on with
that asteroid we've been tracking?
It's gonna miss the
earth by two degrees.
Eh, well. Let's call it a day.
Here there's a bunch of
free popcorn downtown.
(BEEPING)
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)
(ALARM BLARING)
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
What? Oops, sorry
wrong number.
I was looking for my
nice cousin Kevin,
who doesn't yell at
me when I call him
with information about impending
disasters. What's happening?
(VIDEO GAME SOUNDS)
We've got a situation.
So why are we here again?
We got four minutes
before that meteor hits
the Totally Tools
building, downtown.
Looks like they're
evacuating the building,
but they may not finish in time.
Wait, is that Fred? Yes.
Now, you and Hamster
need to lift the shell...
Say hi for me. Uh,
Gretel says, "Hi."
Now you need to lift
the shell and...
Did she say hi back?
Gretel, you can have a
whole conversation with her
after we save the city.
Right, right. We're
lifting. (GRUNTING)
So what are we doing with this?
We're going to use this to change
the direction of the meteor
and send it back into space.
Fred is doing the
math right now.
You're gonna wanna
hold it at about
47 degree tilt, about 20
feet above the building
and 45 feet... Ugh!
Okay, Gretel, did you get that?
That's way too complicated.
I say we just punch it.
Wait, wait. No, no.
We don't know the composition
or the mass of the meteor.
That means... We've got this.
It's probably gonna be on fire.
Relax, Kevin. Gretel, we don't
know what will happen if...
Meteor Punch!
(GRUNTS)
Yes. Okay, that mostly worked.
What do you mean? Well,
the chunk broke off,
but it's heading away from
downtown towards the...
Oakey!
No!
Someone needs to stop Clearway Law.
Public shouldn't leave reviews for lawyers.
I can't believe Oakey is gone.
KEVIN: He was a
great old tree,
and he meant a lot not
only to you and Bailey,
but so many other
kids and families.
Oakey was a symbol of purity
and innocence for
the entire community.
But, maybe Oakey's passing
is not entirely in vain.
Maybe we've learned
a lesson here today.
Maybe sometimes there are
consequences to our actions.
Consequences that
cannot be solved
with just superhuman
strength, and speed, and...
What?
Look, we fix it with our
superhuman strength and speed.
And glue. And glue.
We'll see you at home.
(CELL PHONE
RINGING) Hey, Fred.
Well, you're kind of pouty
for someone who
just saved the city.
It's just that... (SIGHS)
She never listens to me.
But you saved the city.
I guess it was pretty cool.
Dude, you've got to roll with the
punches. See what I did there.
Because she
punched... I get it.
Hey, Kevin. Why
don't you hop in?
We'll give you a lift.
I'll talk to you later,
Fred. I gotta roll.
(CHUCKLES) With the...
(CELL PHONE BEEPS)
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)
Yep.
This is my life.
(NARRATOR READING)
Ugh! Can you fix it, Lyle?
Yes. I can fix it, Lauren.
Well, hurry up.
I wanna ruin Bethany's
life with this text,
and I've got, like, no bars...
ALIEN VOICE: Greetings,
Earth creatures.
We will now bestow upon you
powers unimaginable.
Ooh. So random, right?
Use your powers wisely
and use them for evil.
Wait. Did he just say evil?
That's what I heard.
Yes, specifically evil.
Oh, so cool.
(CHUCKLES) Let's
wreak some havoc.
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)
♪ Hamster and Gretel
♪ It's Hamster
♪ Hamster and Gretel ♪
Okay, let's hose her down.
We've got no water
pressure, Chief.
It's because of that
broken water main
over at the park.
No water pressure?
It's gonna blow.
It's a good thing
it's been evacuated
because it would take a miracle
to put this fire out now.
Look, Chief. It's
Hamster and Gretel.
A miracle.
Okay, the water
pressure is too low.
So we're gonna need to take the
water from that tower up there.
Use this hose.
You're gonna need to find
the water relief valve
on the base of the
tank and attach...
Uh, too complicated.
I'm just gonna punch it.
Wait, that's not... Gretel.
Stop! Stop! Stop!
Relax. I got this.
Water Tower Punch!
Uh-oh.
Woo-hoo.
Wow, young man. You
almost got drenched.
Yeah, that was close.
You should have seen... Ahh!
Chief, I got word from downtown.
They fixed the water pressure.
Looks like everything
turned out just fine.
Oh, great. My GPS
just went out.
Weird. And why do I
always end up wet?
You know we can go home and
get you a change of clothes.
No, we left the
picnic an hour ago.
Everyone's going
to get suspicious.
You worry too much.
Look, Gretel. You've got to take
my instructions more seriously.
One day there's going to be a
problem you can't fix with a punch.
You've got to learn to
roll with the punches.
See what I did there.
'Cause I fixed it with
the punch. I get it.
We got the napkins.
Hi, mi amore. Thank you.
I was just about to
send out a search party.
Well, the first store was out,
so we had to drive
around a little.
And why are your clothes wet?
Oh, that? It's... It's, uh...
Oh, let the boy be.
He's a sweat piece,
just like his old man.
Sweat proud, son.
Will do. Where's Bailey?
She's waiting for you over
by that tree you like.
Oakey!
Yep. They name the tree.
(GIGGLES) I heard on Dad's radio
that Hamster and Gretel were
in this actual park yesterday.
No way. Yes way.
They saved the kitten from a well
over by that silly clown statue.
Can you imagine?
If we'd have been up here on
Oakey, we might have seen them.
Remember the
kindergarten field trip?
That's when you and
I became best friends
on that branch right
there. And look at us now.
The queens of the tree.
BOTH: The queens of the tree!
Oakey is always going
to be here for us.
Yeah, just like our friendship.
MAN: What's been going on with
that asteroid we've been tracking?
It's gonna miss the
earth by two degrees.
Eh, well. Let's call it a day.
Here there's a bunch of
free popcorn downtown.
(BEEPING)
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)
(ALARM BLARING)
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
What? Oops, sorry
wrong number.
I was looking for my
nice cousin Kevin,
who doesn't yell at
me when I call him
with information about impending
disasters. What's happening?
(VIDEO GAME SOUNDS)
We've got a situation.
So why are we here again?
We got four minutes
before that meteor hits
the Totally Tools
building, downtown.
Looks like they're
evacuating the building,
but they may not finish in time.
Wait, is that Fred? Yes.
Now, you and Hamster
need to lift the shell...
Say hi for me. Uh,
Gretel says, "Hi."
Now you need to lift
the shell and...
Did she say hi back?
Gretel, you can have a
whole conversation with her
after we save the city.
Right, right. We're
lifting. (GRUNTING)
So what are we doing with this?
We're going to use this to change
the direction of the meteor
and send it back into space.
Fred is doing the
math right now.
You're gonna wanna
hold it at about
47 degree tilt, about 20
feet above the building
and 45 feet... Ugh!
Okay, Gretel, did you get that?
That's way too complicated.
I say we just punch it.
Wait, wait. No, no.
We don't know the composition
or the mass of the meteor.
That means... We've got this.
It's probably gonna be on fire.
Relax, Kevin. Gretel, we don't
know what will happen if...
Meteor Punch!
(GRUNTS)
Yes. Okay, that mostly worked.
What do you mean? Well,
the chunk broke off,
but it's heading away from
downtown towards the...
Oakey!
No!
Someone needs to stop Clearway Law.
Public shouldn't leave reviews for lawyers.
I can't believe Oakey is gone.
KEVIN: He was a
great old tree,
and he meant a lot not
only to you and Bailey,
but so many other
kids and families.
Oakey was a symbol of purity
and innocence for
the entire community.
But, maybe Oakey's passing
is not entirely in vain.
Maybe we've learned
a lesson here today.
Maybe sometimes there are
consequences to our actions.
Consequences that
cannot be solved
with just superhuman
strength, and speed, and...
What?
Look, we fix it with our
superhuman strength and speed.
And glue. And glue.
We'll see you at home.
(CELL PHONE
RINGING) Hey, Fred.
Well, you're kind of pouty
for someone who
just saved the city.
It's just that... (SIGHS)
She never listens to me.
But you saved the city.
I guess it was pretty cool.
Dude, you've got to roll with the
punches. See what I did there.
Because she
punched... I get it.
Hey, Kevin. Why
don't you hop in?
We'll give you a lift.
I'll talk to you later,
Fred. I gotta roll.
(CHUCKLES) With the...
(CELL PHONE BEEPS)
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)
Yep.
This is my life.
(NARRATOR READING)
Ugh! Can you fix it, Lyle?
Yes. I can fix it, Lauren.
Well, hurry up.
I wanna ruin Bethany's
life with this text,
and I've got, like, no bars...
ALIEN VOICE: Greetings,
Earth creatures.
We will now bestow upon you
powers unimaginable.
Ooh. So random, right?
Use your powers wisely
and use them for evil.
Wait. Did he just say evil?
That's what I heard.
Yes, specifically evil.
Oh, so cool.
(CHUCKLES) Let's
wreak some havoc.
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)
♪ Hamster and Gretel
♪ It's Hamster
♪ Hamster and Gretel ♪