Graceland (2013–2015): Season 1, Episode 2 - Guadalajara Dog - full transcript

Previously on Graceland...

We got a new agent coming in.

He's your new trainee.
Name's Mike Warren.

Graduated top of his class
at Quantico.

Hey, why do they
call it Graceland?

When they seized it
from this drug lord,

he was apparently
some hard-core Elvis fan.

The name just kinda stuck.

So you, me, Briggs,
and Charlie are FBI.

Lauren and Donnie are DEA.

So is Paige, but she's
on vacation for a couple days.



Oh, and Jakes is customs.

The house is a tight fit.

You're gonna find out real fast

there are no secrets
at Graceland.

- Except for Briggs.
- Yeah.

Except for Briggs.

Give me the gun,
and get in the car.

This is your last chance.

Something's wrong.

Or what?

[Gunshots]

You saw the gun?

Yeah, I see it right there.

Agent Briggs saved my life.



Your assignment is
to investigate Briggs.

Will what he did
affect that ability?

No, sir.

I heard they kinda slammed you
with this job, huh?

[Sighs] Yeah.
Yeah, they did.

No idea why?

No, sir.

[Rock music]

♪ ♪

[Dog barks]

♪ ♪

My main man Mike,

what do you see, what do you
feel, what do you think?

You know, I'm thinking
this might not be too bad.

First thing you gotta do,
figure out

who the new Mike is
in this world.

- New Mike?
- Yeah.

FBI agent Mike Warren
can never be seen here,

that's for damn sure.

They must always see you
as someone else.

- Mike the surf bum.
- [Laughs]

Yeah, maybe when you can
stay on your surfboard

for more than eight seconds,
we'll talk about that.

Ah.
Who do they think you are?

They think I'm Paul,
that I like motorcycles,

and that I'm into Tae Bo.

- That's it?
- And rum.

- It's vague.
- Vague is good.

Details invite questions.

Questions are
what can burn Graceland.

[Chuckles] Hey, hey.

My, my, my.

Johnny!
What's up?

[Indistinct chatter]

- Yo, Paul.
- Hey.

Yo.
Mikey, what up?

What's up?

Working on the new Mike.

That sounds like
a lot of work, bro.

You boys up
for a little Hector's?

- Hell yeah.
- What's Hector's?

Both: What's Hector's?

- Hola, Hector.
- Hola, Paul.

Can we get tres carnitas,
tres Al pastor,

y tres tacos
de carne asada, por favor?

You ever had a taco so good
you saw God?

Can't say I have.

Oh, my brother,
you're about to join a cult.

- Fire me up.
- [Speaking Spanish]

Oy!
You have to pay for that!

- Hey, hey.
- Get back here!

- Mike! Mike!
- You all right, man?

Johnny, stop him right now.

- Aah!
- Whoa!

Whoa!

- Oh, help her.
- Yeah, man.

Are you okay?

Stop!
Hey! Hey!

Stop!

[Grunts]

What the hell
are you doing, man?

What the hell
are you doing, Mike?

Are you kidding me right now?

- Easy, easy.
- He's getting away.

- Yeah, that's right.
- Easy! Take it easy.

What the hell were you gonna do,
flash your badge and cuff him?

What choice did I have?
He hit that guy.

That's right,
the FBI field manual

clearly states that if we
witness an act of violence,

- we must engage.
- That's exactly right.

Screw the book.
It wasn't written for you, okay?

You're an undercover agent.

That means your cover
is everything.

Especially here.
This is our home.

Dude, you almost burned
Hector's tacos.

Well, he was robbing
Hector's tacos.

Hector's tacos...
shit's real!

If we pulled our badge
on every single crime we saw,

Graceland would be burnt
in a week.

Yo, man, yo.
Go join the LAPD

if you want to catch
a chips thief, bro.

Never again, Mike.

Hector's tacos!
God!

[Upbeat music]

♪ ♪

[Water running]

♪ ♪

[Woman speaking Spanish
on recording]

[Repeats Spanish]

♪ ♪

Mornin', sunshine.

Too happy.
Too loud.

[Dog barks]

Hey, bud, remember me?
Come on.

Come on.

♪ ♪

[Humming]

[Woman continues speaking
Spanish on recording]

- Morning, levi.
- Morning.

Didn't get enough running
in yesterday?

- You heard.
- Of course we heard.

Never burn Hector's, man.
That sh... is real.

I'm cool with Hector's,
all right?

Morning, Charlie.
Oh!

God, you're so loud.

Yeah, I wish I could say
her walks of shames were rare.

This is not a walk of shame.

This pathetic thing
you see before you

is the price of cultivating
a C.I.

who likes Jagermeister
and Dubstep.

You knew the risks when you
joined the bureau, woman.

Yo, yo, yo.
Good morning, homies.

What's up, man?

- Yo, Briggs.
- Yeah.

Messenger from the bureau
was dropping that off for you.

- Thank you.
- Where's Lauren?

Upstairs being Lauren.

Briggs, you should talk to her.

All: Oh!
- What is that?

Wet shoes and cheese?

It's durian fruit.

Shut the hell up, man.

Look, I'm under
with the Malaysians, yo.

I gotta sweat this stuff out
if I'm gonna smell the part.

Donnie Brasco-style, son.

Go eat by the window.
Get that sh... out of my face.

Jakes, got a couple
of flapjacks

with your name on 'em, bro.

I'll take one to go.

I gotta get out of here

and get me some birds.

Okay, seriously?

You're just trying to get away
from Johnny's smell.

- Caught me.
- Thank you.

Take those over
to Johnny, would you?

Is this about yesterday?

You think I'm overreacting?

[Sighs] Okay, listen.

It will never happen again,
all right?

I swear on...
The FBI manual,

which you think I love so much.

I will never do something
so stupid ever again.

Never say never.

[Jamaican accent]
Later, my people!

[Jamaican accent]
Ah, hotcake flyin', lion.

- Aah! Shh...
- Later on, Jakes.

Hey, Johnny,
do me a favor, man.

Open this mail,
try not to get any

of that nasty stink juice
on it.

You're standing
right next to it.

I'm cooking over here.

All right, man.
Uh...

First up, psych order,
for you, of course.

[Laughs]
And Mr. Mikey.

Poppin' your cherry.

The famous Russian shootings,
huh?

I didn't pull the trigger.

Doesn't matter.
You watched two guys get shot

by me.

Don't tear it up
in front of the kid.

Why not? I already punched
my psych card, sweetheart.

I got the free sandwich next.

- Briggs...
- Yeah. Go.

Everybody on our island
of misfit toys

could use
a little head shrinking.

It's at the FBI office
downtown, okay?

Next bit of business...

It's from the brass.

They want Mikey
on one of your actives.

Oh, that's great.
Give me that.

Mike, upstairs.

Yo, taste it.
Just taste it.

- [Sighs] Oh...
- Mix it in. Mix it up.

Why you gotta play me
like that?

- Mix it up with some sugar.
- How you gonna play me like...

put some sugar on it.
You won't even taste it!

I'm done.

I can do it.

I can't just squeeze you
onto something, Mike.

You're too green.

You still got
that new-car smell on you.

We kicked ass together
with the Russians.

Mmhmm. You mean
when you almost shot Donnie?

Or when Donnie almost shot you?

That's not fair.

Listen, I know
your whole case log.

Put me on Gutierrez.

[Chuckles] Gutierrez.
How's your espanol?

Bueno.
[Speaking Spanish]

[Speaking Spanish]

Si.

What about
the Irish counterfeiters?

Inactive.

- Bello.
- [Laughs]

Put me on Bello.

- Hell no.
- I'm up to speed on Bello.

Up to speed.

He's a major player
in long beach.

He's trying to unite
all the street gangs.

He's into drugs, guns.

He's never met a vice
he didn't like.

Mmhmm. I've been
working him for months.

You've been in the field
less than two weeks.

You are not ready.

I mean, you almost burned
Hector's, for Christ's sakes.

Come on, the bureau
wants me on something.

That's right.
A million crimes in this city,

I am sure we can find you one
with training wheels.

[Sighs]

[Electronic music]

♪ ♪

That's the truck.

[Jamaican accent]
How long has it been here?

Not long.

The birds, them better not
be dead, you know, man.

Parrot: We're dead.

No worries, man,
it's air-conditioned.

All right.

[Birds squawking]

Hey.
What this, man?

What happened
to my hundred birds?

And only two golden conures?

Man, them should be there.

Yo, me not see them,
me not pay for them, you know.

Somebody must have
screwed up the order.

Parrot: We're screwed.

Who you get them from?

Hey.

Yo, me see something
in the back there, you know.

Some box.
That's not no birds.

There's something wrong.

Hey!

Parrot: We're dead.

I'm in the truck.
Get me out of here.

Grabbed the guys
running for the road.

Should we arrest you too?

Hilarious.

Now pull the crate
out of there.

Gentlemen, looks like
we got ourselves

some highly illegal,
high-performance

steel-core cop killers.

Hmm...

DEA pulling your cover
with the Russians, huh?

It's too hot after the arrests.

I've got a week.

I'm telling them
I'm going back to Ukraine

to take care of my sick father.

Ah. What ailment
you giving pops?

[Russian accent]
He's Russian. Too much vodka.

[Chuckles] You, uh...

you know about Donnie, right?

It's not official.

Yeah, actually, it is.

I'm sorry, l boogie,
but he ain't coming back.

I'm gonna miss him too.

- I have a week.
- Hey.

Do your job.
Gotta let him go.

Could you?

No, I'm more
of a cautionary tale.

Taken under advisement.

All right.

[Indistinct chatter]

Mike Warren?

Yeah. I'm here to see
Dr. Badillo

for my after-action
evaluation.

He's expecting you.
Go on in.

Hey, Mike.
Have a seat.

- What, no couch?
- No.

Are you disappointed?
A little bit.

So...
History of the FBI.

It's a good read.

Do I call you
Dr. Badillo?

[Sighs] Call me Juan.

- Okay.
- FBI director.

That's the Mike Warren plan,
right?

You're reading my file?

It says you requested
to be stationed in D.C.

Why is that?

It's the best place
to work your way up.

- Up to?
- Maybe director.

[Exhales]

Why would you want
the pressure?

I believe there's evil
in the world,

and I want to fight it and win.

- You believe in the bureau?
- I do, sir.

What got you hooked?

My grandfather.

He worked
at the J. Edgar building in D.C.

So you're a legacy.

Well, no, not really.
He wasn't an agent.

He was a photographer.
Hmm.

Crime scene.

You know, hoover requested him
himself once.

God, I think that was
the highlight of his life.

Are you disappointed
in your assignment to Graceland?

D.C. is a whole continent
in the other direction.

Initially I was,
but the house is great.

The agents there are great.

What about your training
officer, Paul Briggs?

Is he great too?

He's...

Complicated.

You say he saved your life
that night.

He did. If he didn't pull
that trigger, I'd be dead.

You feel you owe him?

[Exhales] I do.

How is he complicated?

[Chuckles]

How much time you got?

You're not a shrink, are you?

What gave me away?

Well, there's no "doctor" in
front of your name on the door.

I think you bought this book
for me.

And if you were a shrink,
I wouldn't feel like

I was being interrogated.

Let's take a walk.

You're observant.

I like that.
Thanks.

So who are you?

I'm your control officer
for your investigation

into Paul Briggs.

[Exhales] Finally.

I've been waiting for somebody
to tell me what's going on.

You know, from what I've heard,

you're just like him
out of the academy.

You have the same energy,
brain,

passion he had then.

Why am I investigating him?

[Chuckles] Look.

For now just get close to him,
become his friend.

Briggs isn't the kind of guy

you get tight with overnight.

So take your time.

You're in Graceland
for the duration.

You want to be
in that FBI book one day,

but how are you gonna do it
from here?

This isn't a detour, Mike.

This is the fast track.

You help us with Briggs,

and you write your own ticket
out of Graceland

and back to D.C.

Blackmail?

Incentive.

Make him put you on a case.
Get in tight with him.

It's not easy.

That's why we chose you.

[Knocks on door]

Come in.

- Can I ask you for some advice?
- Of course.

- It's about Briggs.
- Briggs, Briggs.

Of course it's about Briggs.

I'm trying to get him
to put me on something,

but he keeps saying
I'm too green.

He's right.
Don't fight him on it.

Charm him.
Briggs likes self-starters.

You need
to bring him something.

Okay, well,
there is this guy Bello.

He's an up-and-comer Briggs
is trying to get close to.

He's just playing the periphery.
He hasn't even met the guy.

Okay, so that means Briggs
needs to do something big

and splashy
in order to get his attention.

How do I get him to do splashy?

Well, in order
for him to get noticed,

he needs to give him something
he wants but doesn't have.

He's a drug supplier,
offer him new territory.

He's smuggling car parts,

offer him a cheaper source,
whatever.

That's the thing
with this guy Bello, though.

He seems to be involved
in everything.

There you go.
You got some options.

Okay. Great.

Good advice?

- Yeah.
- Now I need a favor from you.

I need a man
for a little covert op.

- Specifically a man?
- A man.

It'll be fun.
I'm a man.

Welcome
to our undercover closet.

Stuff we've accumulated
over the years.

Why toss it
if we can use it, right?

Especially if we have
to travel back in time.

We need to find something
to make you look tough.

I look tough.

You do.
You radiate bad-ass.

[Chuckles]
How about gun-toting preacher?

Tough is the wrong word.
It's more like cocky.

- This is cocky?
- Confident.

Close enough.

Where are we going?

To make a delivery
to the one roommate

you haven't met yet.

Paige?

Yeah. You'll like her.
Karaoke bar.

I go there alone,
and every jerkoff in there

starts hitting on me.

So I'm your boyfriend?

My cocky, confident boyfriend.

- Mm.
- Lose the Oxford.

What's up, kids?

- Hey, Jakesy.
- What's up, man?

- Hey.
- How's the parrots?

Good.

Got a couple of those
and about a thousand of these.

- [Whistles]
- 5.740-grain hard core?

Boy knows his bullets.

- These are illegal.
- Yeah.

Crazy illegal.

What happens to these now?

Well, I gotta inventory them,

and then I turn them over
to the marshals for destruction.

Hmm, lot of paperwork.

Illegal cop-killing rounds
smuggled in

from a foreign country...

I'll be knee-deep in ink
for a week.

Hmm.

Give it back.

What are you thinking, Mikey?

Maybe a way to help Briggs
make a splash.

♪ Can't help it,
the girl can't help it ♪

[Singing in korean]

♪ Can't help it,
the girl can't help it ♪

- Hey, honey.
- Ugh.

Boyfriend.

You ever had a girlfriend
before, Mikey?

- Who's the geek?
- Excuse me.

Grab my ass.

- Seriously?
- Seriously.

Mark your territory
and grab my ass.

Mm. Wow.

So that's what
your squeezy thing has been for.

Among other things.

Easy, tiger.

That's Paige.

♪ Can't help it,
the girl can't help it ♪

[Singing in korean]

Stop staring.
You're still my fake boyfriend.

[Singing in korean]

♪ Can't help it,
the girl can't help it ♪

[Singing in korean]

[Giggles] Whoo!

That's Bobby Moi.

He's got his fingers
on most east side contraband.

She's under as his girlfriend.
[Applause]

That was Paige singing
the girl can't help it.

Give her another round
of applause.

[Applause]

Bathroom.

[Laughs] Shut it!

Okay, that was...

I know,
I can't even hear it anymore.

Can't hear it.
Did you get 'em?

Right here.

God, I need to start buying
these things in bulk.

So... This is
the infamous levi.

- It's Mike.
- He's my boyfriend tonight.

- Mm.
- He's cute, right?

Yeah, he's hot.
It's nice to meet you, levi.

Uh, yeah, you too.
It's Mike.

You fresh out of Quantico?

- Yes, ma'am.
- Uh, at ease, soldier.

Still making
no headway with Bobby?

Nothing. I'm two weeks under
with him,

and all he wants to do
is get under me.

Ugh.

Wait, is that what
the birth control pills are for?

I'm not taking them.

Well, your agency
doesn't expect you to, um...

I'm not gonna screw him.

The pills are for Bobby.

You give a guy
a couple of these,

and his soldier's at ease.

- Really?
- Really.

Ugh, thank God.
I can't take this anymore.

Gross.

Well, can I ask you a question?

I mean, you're going under
as his girlfriend.

Don't you kind of
expect him to want to, um,

well, you know...
Wanna get with you?

- Absolutely.
- Why don't you get out?

Because I want the bastard.

Okay, mama,
there's a lot in here.

- Thanks, Charlie.
- Good luck.

It was nice to meet you, Mike.

[Door opens]

Told you you'd like her.

You cannot be a thug
wearing beads.

I didn't get the memo.

- What, you moving up?
- [Chuckles] No.

I still haven't met Bello,

but I'm close to one
of his lieutenants, Eddie.

- What's he about?
- A little Jekyll,

you know, a little Hyde.

He's an affable dude,

but he can turn on you
in a heartbeat.

- Sounds just like me.
- Oh, yeah.

Is there anything
your Malaysian contacts have

that Bello might want?

No. No.

My guys are heavy into mink
and lanolin oil.

Any of Bello's crew
like to wear fur?

Not that I know of.

- Oh, incoming.
- You guys talking about Bello?

I think I got something
that might help.

Come on in, Mike.

So one of the things

Bello's looking for
is firepower, right?

I see you read my case file.

Jakes just scored a thousand
armor-piercing bullets.

You think Bello
would be into that?

Continue.

You tell Bello that
you got a guy at camp Pendleton

with the bullets... a marine.
That'd be you.

- I've got the look, right?
- You do.

So we borrow the bullets
from Jakes

and sell them
to one of Bello's guys.

- Eddie, mm-hmm.
- Eddie.

Arrest Eddie, flip him,

and make him
bring you to Bello.

Ah, and you started off
so strong.

It's too risky.
There's too many moving pieces.

If it got back to Bello,
I'd be dead.

But I appreciate the effort.
It's a work in progress.

I'll think about it.

Hey, stranger.
What you doing home?

Charlie and Mike
helped me spike Bobby's drink.

[Chuckles]
The dreaded spike, huh?

- Mm-hmm.
- Couldn't get it up, huh?

Nope. He got embarrassed
and kicked me out.

Third time.
Yeah.

You know, at some point,
the guy's gonna stop drinking.

I know. And then what?
I seriously hate this case.

He's not giving me anything.

He won't talk business
in front of a woman.

Right.

Well, you know,
ease your way out.

I should.
But I want him.

I mean, he's such a pig.

- Hmm.
- But you're right.

This won't end well for me.

You know, I do still have
a connection with Bobby's crew.

II can't ask you to do that.

You know I owe you plenty.

And you didn't ask.

- Thanks, Paul.
- Yeah.

[Knocks on door] Enter.

I thought about it.
Your plan's awesome.

We get rolling in the morning.

What changed?

Mm, told you.
Thought about it.

Tell Jakes.

Hey, Jakes,
can I ask you something?

- Yeah, man, go ahead.
- Those 5.7s.

- Have you filed them yet?
- No.

Would you mind
if I borrowed them?

Are you out
of your goddamn mind?

It's only for the day.
Briggs will sign for 'em.

You think that makes me
feel better?

Look, levi, one of these
gets out on the streets,

happens to penetrate
the body armor

and chest cavity
of an LAPD officer,

I'll be in jail,
getting penetrated

in a different cavity,
you feel me?

I'll trade you.

What do you want?

I want you to leave me alone.

I'll do your next round
on the chore wheel.

Jakes, come on, man.

Let these bullets
do some good in the world

before they're destroyed.
Hmm?

All right,
I'll tell you what, levi.

Two.
Two turns on the wheel.

Done.

How many rounds you gonna need?

All of 'em.

[Indistinct chatter]

[Laughs]

We got G.I. Joe
in the house, guys.

Reporting for duty, sir.

Right off
the recruitment poster.

Reservist with
the 316th quartermaster company

- at Pendleton.
- Mmhmm.

[Southern accent] Manufacturer
donated some bullets

for live fire testing.

Not all of 'em made it
to the range.

Dig it.
Don't depart from it.

Now, look, the bureau boys
worked hard

to get this backstop for you.

If Eddie or Bello has
the ability to check,

which I highly doubt,
it'll come up

that you're registered
with the 316th.

Expectin' to see
Bello today, sir?

No, no.
It's gonna be Eddie's show.

Bello steers clear
of the indictable stuff.

Sure.

But what is up
with that accent?

Felt quite natural
for the character.

Oh, listen, Mike, you're not
playing curly in Oklahoma,okay?

If it doesn't flow out of you
second nature,

you should drop it.

Dropped.

Now, we're gonna have audio
on both of us.

Okay.

You and I will go in
with 50 rounds of ammo,

test some of the bullets,
and get out of there.

We'll make the sale later

when the odds aren't
so stacked against us.

All right, guys, check it out.

Found a spot a block away
from where you guys are.

Closest we can get.

No visual inside, though,

so no sniper love for you guys.

Well, what's the signal
if something goes wrong?

How 'bout "oh, sh... "?

That's good.

Oh, sh...

[Gunshots]

Damn, Eddie,
what'd that car do to you?

- Hey, Paul.
- [Laughs]

Staying out of trouble,
my friend?

Not so much.
How 'bout you?

- You know me.
- I do.

Eddie, this is my guy.

He's a reservist

out of the 316th quartermaster
company at Pendleton.

- Pendleton.
- Yeah.

Yes.

I'm not packin'.

- Show me what you brought.
- Oh, yeah.

You and the Mexicans both fire
the 5.7s, right, Eddie?

- Yes.
- I'll tell you what.

Compared to these bad boys,
you're shooting blanks.

What we have here
is a 40-grain

high-performance cartridge
with a tungsten carbide core.

A.K.A. cop killers.

Illegal in all 50 states
and Puerto Rico.

Now, feel that missile
right there.

No matter what tactical vest
the other guy's wearing,

touch him with one of those,
he'll be feeling a draft.

We'll see.
Bring out the bears.

- We'll get 'em.
- Bears?

Yes. You know, cops.
Smokey bears.

- Oh.
- [Laughs]

That is real body armor.
L.A.'s finest.

Ready?

Shoot.

[Gunshots]

What are you trying to sell us?

It's a huge cartridge.

The kick will throw
your aim off a bit, that's all.

You're saying we can't shoot?

No, Eddie,
of course you can shoot.

No, you can't.

Team one, we might be
going in hot.

We can't shoot?
Is that what you are saying?

Not without some instruction.

Come on, Mike.

- [Laughs]
- [Chuckles]

- We don't need a lesson.
- May I?

Is he going to shoot me?

If he does, I'll shoot him.

What the hell is he doing?

These bullets are longer
and heavier

than the ones
you're used to shooting.

The recoil is gonna
push the nose up,

so you need to aim
underneath your target.

[Laughter] Oops.

[Chuckles]

[Chuckles]

So we got a deal?

I'll talk to Bello.

But from what I'm seeing,

yes, we have a deal.

So there he was, outnumbered...

one man against five.

That's not a fair fight, right?

- Mm-mm.
- For them.

[Laughter]

'Cause gunslinger Mike
had a full load

and hands of stone.

The first bear
came right at him.

- Bam! Bam!
- Oh, oh!

[Laughter]

The next bear...
Right between the eyes. Blam!

Uhh!
Please don't taxidermy me.

Now, the other bears
are scared, right?

- Mm.
- Doesn't matter,

'cause Mike has no mercy.
Kablam!

Come on, dude, why you
always gotta be like that?

Dj, come on, man.

One of y'all better avenge me.

- I got you, brother.
- Bam!

[Groans] [Laughter]

Terrible. Next bear
behind the back. Blam!

Oh!

I thought we were
on the same team, Mike.

I hope there's honey in heaven.
[Laughter]

Now he sees the last bear
stalking him, way in the back.

Blam!

What's going on?

- You're a bear.
- Mike just shot you.

- Oh, okay. Hold this.
- Take two?

Ready? Ready? Get ready.
Blam!

- Unh!
- Oh, wow. That was good.

And that, my friends,

is the legend
of merciless Mike...

- ♪ Mike ♪
- And the bullet-proof bears.

- All right, I like that one.
- Yeah.

- Bravo. Bravo.
- Hey.

Thanks, man.
Thank you.

Seriously,
some of the best marksmanship

I've ever seen
in my entire life, Mike.

Real talk.
For sure.

- I'm glad you're one of us.
- Yay, yay.

Speaking of which, how'd
your little shrink session go?

- That's private.
- No, the...

Normal shrink B.S.

They wanted to know
if I felt guilty...

Whether I could operate
my firearm.

You're not afraid to use
your firearm.

No.
[Laughter]

So I take it you're all healed
and whatnot, right?

No, actually, they want
to make it a weekly thing.

- Hey.
- For real?

Don't let them head-game
hippies label you, man.

Like crazy Jakes here.

Right.
[Laughter]

I already got a nickname.

All I know is those ink blots
look pissed off.

[Laughter]

Well, to our merry,
merry band of misfits, huh?

- Yes.
All: Cheers.

[Indistinct chatter]

Jakes, anybody else need
a re-up?

- I'm good, man. Thank you.
- My man Mike?

No, man.
Got a big day tomorrow.

Oh, yeah.

500,000, right?
It's all there.

All right.

[Indistinct chatter]

- Bullets are walking.
- There they go.

Please tell me we have
a tracker on them.

Not unless you put one
in there.

What are you talking about?

The plan was to arrest Eddie
when he had the ammunition.

No, that was your plan.
Get in.

I got the plate
off Eddie's truck.

We should call it in.

Nah, we're not
gonna call it in.

They switched their plates
the second

they rolled off the junkyard.

You're not at all concerned

about the crate of cop killers
we just let walk away?

Have you ever been
to Guadalajara?

No, I've never been
to Guadalajara.

- The food there is amazing.
- Where are we going?

You know what they don't have
in Guadalajara, though?

It's a damn shame...
sour cream.

[Indistinct chatter]

Now, right there
is sun city hot dogs.

They have got a dog
that is smothered in sour cream,

tomatoes, and jalapenos.

Mwah!

For the life of me,
I can't figure out why,

but they call it
a Guadalajara dog.

I need one.
[Chuckles]

And a large root beer.
Get yourself something too.

This is bullshit, Briggs.

Hey, we are focused
on hot dogs right now, okay?

There's a line.

You graduated first
in your class.

Figure it out, buddy.

Genius.

Okay.

Agent Badillo's office.

Mike Warren.
Can I talk to Juan?

Sorry, Mike, he's out.
I can give him a message.

Tell him it's about
Paul Briggs, and it's important.

Thanks, Katie.

Excuse me, I'm with
the L.A. county animal control.

Don't worry,
I'm not shutting it down.

- What?
- Animal...

Ah, my man.
Thanks.

Oh-ho.

Chili cheese.
You naughty boy.

Thank you.

I thought we were in a hurry.

Yeah, we were.
Now we're right on schedule.

For what?

Do you trust me, Mike?
Be honest.

No, sir.

Hmm.

You know what a heat run is?

I know you do
because it's in the book.

A heat run is
when someone makes a series

of random turns
and speed changes

- in order to avoid a tail.
- Mmhmm.

- I love it.
- You like that?

- Mmhmm. - Verbatim.
I'm impressed.

Now, you know our boy Eddie.

He just bought $1/2 million
in illegal ammo

and also switched
his license plates.

You think, uh,
maybe he's making a heat run

to make sure nobody
follows him back

to our fellow Bello?
He should.

Yeah, he is.
Bet your ass on it.

Eat your chili cheese dog.

It's good, huh?

- Yeah, it's good.
- Told you.

I've been in with these guys
for a couple of months now.

The driver, Eddie,
idiot that he is,

he always makes
the same exact heat run.

Same turns, same cutbacks.
Never varies.

Well, that's pointless.

Yeah, it is kinda pointless,

but it damn sure
makes our day shorter.

Because you know
where he's going.

Mmhmm.
Matter of fact,

they should be over there
in three,

two, one.

[Chuckles]

Give it a second.

Ah, there they are.
Must have hit a light.

Okay, is the tac team
gonna hit 'em now?

No, tac team's
not gonna hit 'em.

Watch the show, young jedi.

[Tires screech]

[Inhales] Ooh.

[Tires screech]

Down on the ground!
Put your hands up.

Hey, eat.

Wait, who are they?

Oh, that's, uh,
Bobby Moi's guys.

That's Paige's guy?

Mmhmm. The same.
Mr. Limpdick.

Get out!
Hands on your head!

- Do you know who we are?
- Spread your legs.

Grab the box!
Grab the box in the back.

[Indistinct shouting]

- Spread your legs.
- Are we arresting them?

Well, I mean, you know,
if you want to waltz over there,

whip out your badge
and expose yourself

as a federal agent
in front of all those weapons...

No, sir.

All right.
I mean, are you sure?

I mean, we are witnessing
a violent crime

in progress, agent Warren.

You might wanna go make
a citizen's arrest or something,

get promoted.
I get it.

[Indistinct shouting]
[Engine starts]

[Tires screech]

Now what?

Well, now we're gonna
go buy our bullets back.

[Engine starts]

[Siren wails in distance]

[Speaking korean]

- Bobby.
- Paulie.

Uh...
Is this place safe?

Yeah, of course.

Hey, I've seen you before.

Yeah, I was in here
the other night with my girl.

Oh, yeah.

- Pretty little Italian piece.
- Mmhmm.

Great.
Now we all know each other.

- Tell the tale.
- Clockwork.

Would make the Swiss jealous.

[Chuckles]
Look, I got your thousand.

- Show me my money.
- All right.

Ta-da.

- That's beautiful.
- Yeah.

So we got a deal?

Yeah, we got a deal.

Pleasure doing business
with you, Robert.

- Nobody move!
- Whoa! Hey! Yo, man!

Wow, Bobby, nice move.

I swear to God, Paulie.

- Okay, okay.
- I swear to God, Paulie.

[Indistinct chatter]

Why didn't you tell me
this was your plan?

You said it yourself
back in the jeep.

You don't trust me.

So who were you calling back
at the hot dog stand anyway?

Oh, just messages.

- Messages?
- Yep.

You know, it's funny,
I thought maybe for a second

you were tempted to call
our little plan in

to the bureau or something.

- I was tempted.
- Hmm.

But I didn't.

But what if you had
called it in and crashed it?

You know, this only worked
because all of it worked.

Yeah, but anything
could have gone wrong.

Eddie does a new heat run,

one of Bobby's guys
shoots somebody.

Those bullets get
on the street,

you don't have any control
over it.

Yeah, but it didn't go wrong.

Today was a good day.

Accept that.
Revel in it.

'Cause not all of 'em are,
let me tell you.

I mean, look.
Our side won.

Jakes gets his bullets back,

plus a little slave labor
from you.

My advice to you is to...

Paige got Bobby Moi,
and you and I,

we held up our end
of the deal with Bello.

Well, it's not our fault

his driver messed up
and got jacked.

Hey, not us.

And the best part...

The bureau gets
an extra $1/2 million in cash.

[Laughs] Well, almost.

Looks like Eddie shorted us.

Dirty little bastard.

See, it pays to trust me.

Tac team,
when we're all locked down here,

me and Mike are buying.

[All cheering]

Welcome to my team, Mike.

What's the emergency?

You didn't call me back.

You gotta be careful
with phones.

Briggs put me
on his Bello case.

That's straight-up
excellent, Mike.

But that's not why you called.

No, I called because
I thought he was making a play.

- He wasn't.
- You can't underestimate Briggs.

He's...
[Chuckles]

He hits the trifecta
while the rest of us

are still sizing up the horses.

That I know. Help me find out
what I don't know.

[Cell phone chirps]

[Chuckles] It's Briggs.

You're smarter than him, Mike.

Hit your own trifecta.

So you ready to meet the man?

- Yes, I am.
- Me too.

This is big-time, Mike.

[Suspenseful music]

♪ ♪

[Cocks gun]

Who you been talking to?