Glee (2009–2015): Season 3, Episode 21 - Nationals - full transcript

When Mercedes comes down with a bad case of food poisoning, Will drafts Tina and Quinn to sub for her.

u missed
on Glee: The Glee Club started
out as underdogs,

singing show tunes in the choir
room, and now they're headed
to Chicago

to compete for a national

I mean, they made it
to Nationals last year
in New York,

but they came in 12th.
It was sort of a nightmare.

Rachel's nightmare totally
came true when she choked

at her NYADA audition,
and literally all she's talked

about for three years is New
York, Broadway, Streisand,

And that's what you missed
on Glee.


What's going on?
How bad is it?

Her temperature's 101 degrees.

Given the fact that Weezy's

about an upset stomach,

it's either Amazonian dengue
fever or the H1N1 super virus.

Or I have
food poisoning.

We all wanted burritos for
lunch, so we went to Chipotle,

but Mercedes tried some dive
called "Señora Salsation."

Will, word, please.

With Monique down
for the count,

we are entering
the Hunger Games of
show choir competition

without one of our most
powerful voices.

We need to have a plan.

Right. Because New Directions!
doesn't win,

that means you go back
to being co-captains

of the Cheerios! with
Roz Washington.

Your sniping is as expository
as it is wrong.

Yes, I have fantasized
about handing that prize money

to Principal Figgins
so I could buy back my sole
control of the Cheerios!,

but my main concern right now
is for these kids.

I want this one for them.

I just don't want everything
we worked for to collapse

because of one bad burrito.

So here's what's gonna happen:
Mercedes, you're on bed rest,

Quinn, you're stepping in.
No, no, no, I can't

dance that number. I can't sing
it, either, not like...

The Trouble Tones need you.

And you're better than you
think you are.

Tina, you, too.
You're in the Trouble Tones.

Mr. Shue, this is my last

I don't want to miss it.

Amen, to that, sister.
That's why I'm putting you

on a vitamin B-12 drip.

We're flushing your system

with Pedialyte, and I'm gonna

fill that bathtub with ice
and see if we can't get

your ambient body temperature
back down to normal.

Worked in Jacob's Ladder.

All right, we all have
our marching orders.

Let's do it.


You okay?

What if we don't win? What's
gonna happen with those kids?

It's a competition.

They understand
that everybody can't win.

But they never get to win.

School's almost over,
forever for most of them.

Can you imagine what
what it would be like
for them

to have just a couple
of days walking the halls
as champions?

It's something
they would carry
around with them

for the rest
of their lives.

If you're gonna lead
them to the promised land,

you're gonna have
to have an attitude

But, Will,
they're ready.

You made 'em ready
for three years.

But what if it wasn't enough?

Will, you better
come downstairs.

We got a problem.

(kids yelling)

Hey, calm down!
Hey, hey, calm down! Calm down!

Fight, fight, fight!

Hey, cool out!

He's studying
for geography

while we're trying
to rehearse! It's bogus!

'Cause I already
know the dance!

You dance like you
got your feet caught
in bear traps.

You're trying
to gnaw them off.

Mr. Shue, are you aware
that while we're arguing
about jazz squares,

Unique is being handed the key
to the city by Rahm Emanuel?

And plus my pillow and my
blanket fell into the pool.

Look, I think everybody is
just a little tired.

We've been rehearsing
for three straight hours.

Yeah, and we'll rehearse
all night if we have to.

We can rest after we've won!

Just because we've lost Mercedes

doesn't mean we can be anything
less than perfect. Perfect!

That's easy for you to say.

Okay, you know what?
You know what?

Hey! I don't want
to hear any of this,
"We can't do it without her,"

because guess what?
We don't have a choice.

So be warned:
if you are not giving this

everything you've got,

I will go all
Lima Heights on
your sorry asses.

Listen to yourselves.

I know. I'm sorry.
I always go

to the yelling place.
I have rage.

No, it's a good thing.
A great thing.

There is so much passion
in this room

Even all your arguing,
it's about the work.

You guys really wanthis.

Okay, so let's take
a half-hour break,

and then we'll run it
from the top.

Mr. Shue, is it okay
if we keep going? We got

the first slot,
which is, like, the death slot.

We have to be amazing.

Yeah, "Edge of Glory's"
a bitch.

I said I'd be dancing
by nationals.

I'll be damned if I don't.

Okay, then let's
keep going.

Mike, help the guys out
with the choreography.

Artie, help Puck
with his geography.

Ladies, "Edge of Glory."
Come on.

Brittany, run us through it.

From the chorus?
Yeah, from the chorus.
Let's do it.

Watch out. We're gonna
do it. Okay. Ready?

Five, six,
seven, eight.

One, two, three, four, five...

You okay?

...six, seven, eight.

One, two, three, four...

Keep up.

Looking for what's left
of your dignity?

Nice to see you, too, Jessie.

If I were you, I'd be
spending more time fing

on how you're gonna wrap up
fourth place

than looking for her.

There's no way in hell
Carmen Tibideaux's coming here.

Wait. How do you know
about Carmen?

It's my business
to know everything

that goes on with
my competition.

I'm always looking
for that extra edge.

I hate to think
you pull the same
choke job up there today.

Look, I know exactly what
you're doing right now, okay?

We didn't date for that long,

and I don't even know how much
of it was actually real,

but when you get nervous,
you get mean

and you get really pale,
and then you start putting
your hands

through your hair
like Danny Zuko.

Look, you have no idea
the kind of pressure
I'm under.

Last year, Vocal Adrenaline
only lost for the first time
in eight years.

If we lose again
this year, that's it.
The dynasty is over.

The mystique and aura
that we used to intimidate
our opponents with will vanish.

I promised them that
I would reboot the program.
I'll be humiliated.

You did help the program.

What you did with
Unique was amazing.

It was a pretty
inspired idea of mine.

It was actually Kurt's
and Mercedes', but...

But I implemented it.

I don't know. I just think
these new rules are

messing with my head; 33%

of the numbers have
to be vintage? What does
that even mean?

The only thing vintage
about me is my Tyrone Powers
haircut and my pager.

Are you forgetting who you are,
Jesse, okay?

Your Bohemian Rhapsody was,
like, the benchmark performance

of every show choir
competition in the
past ten years.

Most people don't realize

I lost ten pounds
during that performance.

You guys are
gonna do great today.

Even though we're
definitely gonna beat you.

Oh, cocky all of a sudden.

I like it.

Hey, everything okay?

Yeah, everything's good.
I'm gonna go get ready.

It was very good to see you.
You, too.


Heard you two are getting


Good for you.

Good luck today.

You, too.

For me?
Well, it's for the wedding.

For the Jewish part
where you smash the glass.
It'ske, the climax

of the wedding, right?
Right before we kiss?

Yeah, it's supposed to symbolize
the fragility of life

or the destruction of the temple

or something like that.
It's very sweet.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But whatever. I wanted
a piece of this town
to be there.

This is the town where
everything's gonna change.

We're gonna go from losers
to National Champs.

Your optimism if very sexy.

Well, I'm so optimistic, I put
my money where my mouth is.

You want to bet me

that your dork club is gonna
outdork all the other

dork clubs
in the country?

500 bucks.

You're so on.

Wait a minute.
That money was supposed

to be for our honeymoon, okay?

It was our money that we saved
from babysitting

and the tips you made
at the tire shop!

I'm gonna double it. I'm gonna
make it a thousand dollars.

That's, like, an extra
two nights in Niagara Falls.

What if we lose?
Not this time.

Carmen Tibideaux is coming,
and we're gonna be perfect.

And then we're
gonna get married,

and I'm gonna smash this glass,

and then we're gonna live
happily ever after.

I love you.

All right, gather around,

(kids cheer)

I just want to say a few words
before we go out there.

Hold on, Mr. Shue. Hold on.
You've given us

a lot of pep talks
over the years, but remember,

you told us once
that, you know,

a teacher's job is done when his
students don't need him anymore?

Okay. Finn, the floor is yours.

Last night we all sat around
in a circle

after you went to bed
and we told stories.

But then we went around
the room,

and everybody said what they
wanted to win this thing for,

and we all said the same thing:

we want to win this for you.

And I know every year at school
Figgins gives away

the Teacher of the Year award.

But I don't think
any of us have to wait

to see how we feel about that.

You're, like, our
Teacher of a Lifetime.


Yeah, definitely.

Thank you, Finn, all of you.

I love you guys so much.

(over P.A.)
New Directions, line up.

All right, that's it.
Show time. Hands in, everyone.

Now I know you weren't planning
on doing the show circle

without me.

You're alive!

Yeah, thanks to Sue.
She's a miracle worker.

Oh, well, it's amazing
what a little TLC,

some cortisone
and a witch doctor will do.

Thank God you're okay
because that just means

I'm not gonna fall on my face

during that Trouble Tones

Oh, screw that.

This is our last time
performing together.

You're doing it,
and so you are you, Tina.

I'm not taking no
for an answer.

Plus I have so many steroids
going through my body right now,

I may turn into the Incredible
Hulk if you piss me off.

Okay, if we don't get out
of this room soon,

none of us will be performing.
Let's go!

Go, Weezy!


Dick Butkus,
I beg of you,

chew your cud with
your mouth closed.

Sorry. I'm as nervous
as a cat in a room full
of rocking chairs.

Think how you'd feel
if your entire teaching
career were riding on this.


(sighs) I really wish
we weren't going first.

The kids are right,
it's the death slot.

Carmen Tibideaux isn't here,
Mercedes still has a fever.

I don't know if Quinn...

EMCEE (over P.A.):
Ladies and gentlemen,
welcome to the 48th annual

National High School
Show Choir Competition

brought to you in part
by Salozy-Edison Chevrolet,

where you always save
more money!

Please give a warm Windy City
welcome to our judges...

America's sweetheart,
Lindsay Lohan!

Hollywood gossip legend,
Perez Hilton!

And Democratic City Councilman
representing the new North Side

and the West Loop corridor,

51st Ward Alderman Martin Fong!

I remind you to please turn off
all cell phones and pagers...

The holy trinity...
starting together...

ending together.

Just the way
it should be.

(all giggle)

Please welcome our first

from William McKinley High
School in Lima, Ohio,

the New Directions!

(LadGaga's "The Edge
of Glory" begins)

♪ There ain't a reason ♪

♪ You and me should be alone
tonight, yeah, baby ♪

♪ Tonight, yeah, baby ♪

♪ I got a reason that you
should take me home tonight ♪

♪ Huh, huh, huh, huh ♪

♪ I need a man that thinks
it's right ♪

♪ But it's so wrong tonight,
yeah, baby ♪

♪ Tonight, yeah, baby ♪

♪ Right on the limb ♪

♪ It's where we know
we both belong tonight ♪

♪ Huh, huh ♪

♪ It's hard to feel the rush ♪

♪ To push the dangerous ♪

♪ I'm gonna run right to,
to the edge with you ♪

♪ Where we can both fall
far in love ♪

♪ Out on the edge ♪

♪ Of glory ♪
♪ Glory ♪

♪ And I'm hanging on a moment ♪

♪ Of truth ♪
♪ I'm hanging on
a moment of truth ♪

♪ I'm on the edge ♪

♪ Of glory ♪
♪ Yeah... ♪

♪ And I'm hanging on
a moment with you ♪

♪ Hanging on a moment of truth ♪

♪ I'm on the edge
The edge, the edge ♪

♪ The edge, the edge, the edge ♪

♪ The edge ♪

♪ I'm on the edge ♪

♪ Of glory, yeah ♪
♪ Of glory ♪

♪ And I'm hanging on
a moment with you ♪

♪ With you, with you ♪

♪ With you, with you, with you ♪

♪ Yeah ♪
♪ I'm the edge ♪

♪ With you, with you, with you ♪

♪ With you, with you ♪

♪ Ah, yeah ♪

♪ I'm on the edge with you. ♪

(audience cheering, stomping)

She didn't come.
Stop it.

Look at me.

This is your moment!

Okay? Three years in the making.

Forget about everything else.
Take it.

(applause, whistling fades)

(Celine Dion's "It's All Coming
Back to Me Now" begins)

♪ There were nights when
the wind was so cold ♪

♪ That my body froze in bed ♪

♪ If I just listened to it ♪

♪ Right outside the window ♪

♪ Ah ah... ♪

♪ There were days when the sun ♪

♪ Was so cruel ♪

♪ That all the tears
turned to dust ♪

♪ And I just knew my eyes ♪

♪ Were drying up forever ♪

♪ Ah ah... ♪

♪ Forever... ♪

♪ I finished crying ♪

♪ In the instant that you left ♪

♪ And I can't remember
where or when ♪

♪ Or how ♪

♪ And I banished every memory ♪

♪ You and I had ever made ♪

♪ But when you
touch me like this ♪

♪ And you hold me like that ♪

♪ I just have to admit ♪

♪ That it's all coming
back to me ♪

♪ It's all coming back ♪

♪ It's all coming back
to me now ♪

♪ There were moments of gold ♪

♪ And there were
flashes of light ♪

♪ There were nights of
endless pleasure ♪

♪ It was more than all your ♪

♪ Laws allowed ♪

♪ Baby, baby, baby ♪

♪ When you touch me like this ♪

♪ And when you hold me
like that ♪

♪ It was gone with the wind ♪

♪ But it's all coming
back to me ♪

♪ I can barely recall ♪

♪ But it's all coming
back to me now. ♪

(audience cheering, applauding)

(Meat Loaf's "Paradise by the
Dashboard Light" begins)

♪ Shah shah shah ♪

♪ Shah
shah shah ♪

♪ Shah shah shah shah shah ♪

♪ Well, I remember
every little thing ♪

♪ As if it happened
only yesterday ♪

♪ Parking by the lake ♪

♪ And there was not
another car in sight ♪

♪ And never had a girl ♪

♪ Looking any better
than you did ♪

♪ Ooh shah shah
ooh shah shah ♪

♪ And all the kids at school ♪

♪ They were wishing
they were me that night ♪

♪ And now our bodies
are oh so close and tight ♪

♪ Ooh shah shah
ooh shah shah ♪

♪ It never felt so good ♪

♪ It never felt so right ♪

♪ Ooh shah shah shah
ooh shah shah ♪

♪ And we're glowing like the
metal on the edge of a knife ♪

♪ Glowing like the metal
on the edge of a knife ♪

♪ Come on ♪

♪ Hold tight ♪

♪ Well, come on ♪

♪ Hold tight ♪

♪ Ah... ♪

♪ Though it's cold and lonely ♪

♪ In the deep dark night ♪

♪ I can see paradise ♪

♪ By the dashboard light ♪

♪ Though it's cold and lonely ♪

♪ In the deep dark night ♪

♪ In the deep dark night ♪

♪ Paradise by
the dashboard light ♪

♪ We're gonna go
all the way tonight ♪

♪ We're gonna go all the way
and tonight's the night ♪

♪ We're gonna go
all the way tonight ♪

♪ We're gonna go all the way,
tonight's the night ♪

♪ We're gonna go
all the way tonight ♪

♪ We're gonna go all the way,
tonight's the night ♪

♪ We're gonna go
all the way tonight ♪

♪ We're gonna go all the way,
tonight's the night ♪

♪ Stop right there ♪

♪ Ah yeah... ♪

♪ I gotta know right now ♪

♪ Before we go any further ♪

♪ Do you love me? ♪

♪ Will you love me forever?
Do you need me? ♪

♪ Will you never leave me? ♪

♪ Will you make me so happy
for the rest of my life? ♪

♪ Will you take me away?
Will you make me your wife? ♪

♪ Let me sleep on it ♪

♪ Sleep on it ♪
♪ Baby, baby,
let me sleep on it ♪

♪ Sleep on it ♪
♪ Let me sleep on it ♪

♪ I'll give you an answer
in the morning ♪

♪ I gotta know right now ♪

♪ Do you love me?
Will you love me forever? ♪
♪ Do you, do you love me? ♪

♪ Do you need me?
Will you never leave me? ♪
♪ Do you, do you need me? ♪

♪ Will you make me so happy
for the rest of my life? ♪

♪ Will you take me away? ♪

♪ Will you make me your wife? ♪

♪ Do you love me? ♪

♪ Will you love me forever? ♪

♪ Let me sleep on it ♪

♪ Will you love me forever? ♪

♪ Let me sleep on it ♪

♪ Oh, will you
love me forever? ♪

♪ Couldn't take it any longer
Lord, I was crazed ♪

♪ When the feeling came upon me
like a tidal wave ♪

♪ Started swearing to my God
and on my mother's grave ♪

♪ That I would love you
to the end of time ♪

♪ I swore ♪

♪ I would love you
till the end of time ♪

♪ Ah ah ah ♪

♪ So now I'm praying
for the end of time ♪

♪ To hurry up and arrive ♪

♪ 'Cause if I gotta spend
another minute with you ♪

♪ I don't think that
I could really survive ♪

♪ I'll never break my promise
or forget my vow ♪

♪ But God only knows
what I can do right now ♪

♪ I'm praying for
the end of time ♪

♪ That's all I can do ♪

♪ All that I can do ♪

♪ I'm praying for
the end of time ♪

♪ So I can end
my time with you ♪

♪ It was long ago
and it was far away ♪
♪ It never felt so good ♪

♪ And it was so much better ♪
♪ It never felt so right ♪

♪ Than it is today ♪
♪ And we were glowing
like the metal ♪

♪ Better than it is today ♪
It was so long ago ♪

♪ And it was so much
better than it is today ♪

♪ Ai-yi-yi-yi ♪
♪ It was long ago ♪

♪ It never felt so good ♪
♪ And it was far away ♪

♪ It never felt so right ♪
♪ And it was so much better
than yesterday ♪

♪ Felt so right ♪

♪ Felt so good ♪

♪ Paradise. ♪

(cheering wildly)



If you've come to mess with my head,
don't worry, I'm not going out there.

We came to wish Unique luck
and give her this flower

Well, Unique has left the building.
Try as I might, I can't conjure her.

Wait, this is just stage fright. Think of the
last time you performed as Unique. You were smash.

That was different. Nobody knew Unique. I didn't
have to be any one other than the one I truly was.

Now everyone is coming for me.
Jesse, the rest of my team,

I can't take the pressure.

All I... All I ever wanted to do, was wear
a dress and sing.

And now I'm a poster to every child that's different.
I can't handle it... I just can't handle it.

You may not be able to handle it,
but maybe Unique can.

You gotta move through that fear and expectation.
At least that's what real stars do.

-Aren;t we supposed to be enemies?
-Yeah, but that's not how we roll in the New Directions.
Not, really our style.

Alright, let me get ready.

Which lipstick?
Ruby red or sugar rose?

Good luck.

Break a heel.

I'll tell you what.

Unique might need to transfer
schools next year.

Please welcome to the stage
from Carmel High in Akron, Ohio,

Vocal Adrenaline!

(Nicki Minaj's "Starships"

♪ Let's go to the beach, each ♪

♪ Let's go get away ♪

♪ They say
what they gonna say ♪

♪ Have a drink, clink,
found the Bud Light ♪

♪ Bad girls like me
is hard to come by ♪

♪ The Patron, on,
let's go get it on ♪

♪ The zone, on,
yes, I'm in the zone ♪

♪ Is it two, three?
Leave a good tip ♪

♪ I'mma blow off my money ♪

♪ And don't give two cents,
whoo! ♪

♪ I'm on the floor, floor ♪

♪ I love to dance ♪

♪ So give me more, more ♪

♪ Till I can't stand ♪

♪ Get on the floor, floor ♪

♪ Like it's your last chance ♪

♪ If you want more, more ♪

♪ Then here I am ♪

♪ Starships
were meant to fly ♪

♪ Hands up ♪

♪ And touch the sky ♪

♪ Can't stop ♪

♪ 'Cause we're so high ♪

♪ Let's do this ♪

♪ One more time ♪

♪ Starships ♪

♪ Were meant to fly ♪

♪ Hands up ♪

♪ And touch the sky ♪

♪ Let's do this ♪

♪ One last time ♪

♪ Can't stop ♪

♪ Higher than any other ♪

♪ Oh, oh ♪

♪ Oh, oh ♪

♪ Higher than any other ♪

♪ Oh, oh ♪

♪ Oh, oh ♪

♪ Higher than any other ♪

♪ Starships were meant to fly ♪

♪ Hands up and touch the sky ♪

♪ Can't stop
'cause we're so high ♪

♪ Let's do this one more time ♪

♪ Starships were meant to fly ♪

♪ Hands up and touch the sky ♪

♪ Let's do this one last time ♪

♪ Can't stop ♪

♪ Higher than any other ♪

♪ Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh,
oh-oh, oh-oh-oh ♪

♪ Oh-oh, oh-oh ♪

♪ Higher than any other ♪

♪ Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh,
oh-oh, oh-oh-oh ♪

♪ Oh-oh, oh-oh ♪

♪ Higher than any other. ♪

(applause and cheering)

(Elton John's "Pinball Wizard"

(tempo builds)

♪ Ever since I was a young boy ♪

♪ I played the silver ball ♪

♪ From Soho down to Brighton ♪

♪ I must have played them all ♪

♪ But I ain't seen nothing like
him in any amusement hall ♪

♪ That deaf, dumb and blind kid
sure plays a mean pinball ♪

♪ He's a pinball wizard,
there has to be a twist ♪

♪ A pinball wizard's got
such a supple wrist ♪

♪ How do you think he does it? ♪

♪ I don't know ♪

♪ What makes him so good? ♪

♪ Well, he ain't got
no distractions ♪

♪ Can't hear no buzzes
and bells ♪

♪ Don't see lights a-flashing ♪

♪ He plays by sense of smell ♪

♪ Always has a replay
and never tilts at all ♪

♪ That deaf, dumb and blind kid
sure plays a mean pinball ♪

♪ He's a pinball wizard ♪

♪ There has to be a twist ♪

♪ A pinball wizard's got
such a supple wrist ♪

♪ He's a pinball wizard ♪

♪ He's scored a trillion more ♪

♪ A pinball wizard ♪

♪ The world's new pinball lord ♪

♪ He's scoring more ♪

♪ He's scoring more ♪

♪ More, more, more, more ♪

♪ I thought I was
the Bally table king ♪

♪ But I just handed
my pinball crown to him ♪

♪ To him ♪

♪ To him ♪

♪ Yeah-ah-ah-ah...! ♪

(song ends)

(cheering wildly)


I have a confession
to make.

I am a show choir junkie.

Some people
follow football;

some people follow the NCAA
basketball tournament;

some people follow
the daily goings-on

in the life of their
wife and children.

Not me. I follow competitive
high school show choir.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Oh, my God!

Did you blog just about me

during that performance?

You're welcome. It's already
got over three million hits.

And secondly,
if you don't love show choir,

then what exactly are you
doing here, Lindsay Lohan?

If you have to ask

why a 12-time Teen Choice Award

is a celebrity judge,

then you don't really understand
what the word celebrity means.

I was robbed for
Freaky Friday.

And I'm here, Perez,

because I care
about young artists

chasing their impossible dreams.

I know them.

I feel them.
I was them.

So, I'm here to support them


Let's get down to business.

We need to narrow our choices
down to the top three.

I, for one, was really moved

by the Scale Blazers'
haunting medley homage

to Starlight Express.

♪ Starlight Express ♪

♪ You must confess ♪

♪ Are you real? ♪

♪ Yes or no? ♪

You know
who I was really impressed with?

The New Directions.

They had so much energy.
It was awesome.

Oh, but gosh, last year
in New York, they choked.

They didn't even
crack the top ten.

I liked them, but they weren't
the best singers and dancers.

They are likable.

And is there anything better

than someone making a comeback?

(wry chuckle)


The New Directions
were horrible.

Jim Steinman should
never be allowed

to write another song again.

I'm for Vocal Adrenaline
all the way.

I think
that Unique kid is a star.

He's like Tina and
Ike Turner...


Just imagine how much
it would mean

to those poor unfortunate

outcast kids

to see him/her

on national television

leading his/her team to victory!

This isn't televised.


This thing isn't
even televised?

I am in full imagery-
rendering mood, people.

I show up here and there's
not even a red button to push?

And a chair that can
spin me around?

Or I can then point
at a kid onstage and yell,
"I would work with you!"

Really? I'm seriously
firing my manager.

Can I use that as an exclusive?

Absolutely not.

This is serious.

These are kids' dreams
on the line out there.

Do you know
what it looks like

when a kid's show choir
dreams are disrespected?


This is what it looks like,

and it really hurts.

We need to vote now.

I need to get back
to my computer ASAP.

The Duggars are pregnant...

Fine by me.

I know who I'm voting for.

What about you, Fonger?

♪ ♪

ANNOUNCER: Ladies and gentlemen,

five minutes
to our award ceremony.

Please return to your seats.
Excuse me, Ms. Tibideaux.

I'm Jesse St. James, the
coach of Vocal Adrenaline.


I auditioned for you
two years ago.

You said I
showed promise.

And you probably did.

I see hundreds of
people every day.

Good day to you.

No, I'm not here for me.

I heard that you came here
today to see Rachel Berry.

And there's something you
need to know about her.

Rachel's the most talented
person I've ever met.

Bar none.

If anyone's gonna be a star
someday, it's her.

She'll make an excellent
contribution to NYADA.

You won't regret it, I promise.

Anyway, thanks
for your time.

Giants in the Sky.

You did "Giants in the Sky"
from Into the Woods.

You ran into obstacles
with your breath work,

and your diction
wasn't crisp enough

to handle what is
arguably Sondheim's
most challenging work.

But your passion and your vocal
range were admirable,

Good luck to you.

And now it's time to announce

the winner of this year's
individual show choir MVP award.

From Vocal Arednaline,

Carmel High's
Wade "Unique" Adams!

(applause and cheering)


And now a round of applause
to your top three finalists

for this year's National
Show Choir Championship.

In third place...

...all the way from Oregon
the Portland Scale Blazers!


And now, ladies and gentlemen,
quiet, please.

Congratulations to both teams
standing with us onstage.

But not it's time
to announce a winner.

The 2012 National
Show Choir Champions...

...from McKinley High
in Limo, Ohio,

The New Directions.

(wild applause and cheering)


(bell ringing)

♪ ♪




(Grouplove's "Tongue Tied"

♪ Take me to your
best friend's house ♪

♪ Going around this runabout ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ Take me to your
best friend's house ♪

♪ I loved you then
and I love you now ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ Don't take me tongue-tied ♪

♪ Don't wave no good-bye ♪

♪ Don't... ♪

♪ Break ♪

♪ One, two, three, four ♪

♪ Don't leave me tongue-tied ♪

♪ Let's stay up all night ♪

♪ I'll get real high ♪

♪ Slumber party; pillow fight ♪

♪ My eyes and your eyes ♪

♪ Like Peter Pan up in the sky ♪

♪ My best friend's house
tonight ♪

♪ Let's bump the beats
till beddy-bye ♪

♪ Don't take me tongue-tied ♪


♪ Don't wave no good-bye ♪

♪ Don't take me tongue-tied ♪

♪ Don't kiss me good night ♪

♪ Don't... ♪

♪ Take me to your
best friend's house ♪

♪ Going around this roundabout ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ Oh, take me to your best
friend's house ♪

♪ I loved you then
and I love you now ♪

♪ Don't leave me tongue-tied ♪

♪ Don't wave no good-bye ♪

♪ Don't leave me tongue-tied ♪

♪ Don't... ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh. ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

(school bell rings)

What could Figgins
want with us?

Maybe we're getting
a key to the city.

Prom royalty...

Finn Hudson and Rachel Berry.

Take a seat,
as I only have

a few moments before I must
chastise the cafeteria cooks

for selling our frozen
vegetables on the black market.

As co-captains of

the nationally victorious
New Directions! singing group,

please accept these official

William McKinley High School
bumper stickers

and miniature pom-poms.

Oh, cool.
And though I don't condone

youngsters getting married,

and I wish that everyone
would wait until they were

at least 29 years old,
with solid employment

and a 401k retirement plan,

here's a little something

for your impending
wedding celebration.

Oh, thank you so much.
Thank you.
My pleasure.

And there is one more
item on the agenda:

McKinley is having a very
special event tomorrow,

and I am requesting that

New Directions!
singing group perform.

Yeah, we'd love to.

Yeah. Absolutely.

What kind of special event?

Can you keep a secret?


And now the award you've all

been waiting for:

Teacher of the Year.

To announce the winner,
please welcome to the stage

so-called Finchel.

(applause, whooping)


The 2012 William
McKinley High School

Teacher of the Year Award
goes to...

Mr. Will Schuester!


Way to go, buddy.

Wait, just, uh...

before you come up
to accept the award,

we just wanted
to say a few things.


Three years ago,
I thought I had it all.

I was the quarterback of
the football team,

I was dating
the head cheerleader.

And then I met you, Mr. Shue,

and I realized
everything I was missing.

There's a lot of great teachers
at this school,

who teach their students
a lot of important stuff,

like how to drive
and-and fractions...

...but you teach your students
how to dream.

As far as I'm concerned,

there's nothing more
important than that.

Mr. Shue...

when I first met you,

I was just an
annoying Jewish girl

with two gay dads
and a very big dream.


I still have two dads,
and I'm still Jewish,

and I'm probably
just as annoying, but...

I stand before you
headed to New York City

come hell or high water

and, um, I can honestly say

that I couldn't have
done it without you,

and I will carry you
every step of the way, so...


Um... no one deserves this
more than you.

We love you and...

this is for you.


"We Are the Champions" begins)

♪ I've paid my dues ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ I've done my sentence ♪

♪ But committed no crime ♪

♪ And bad mistakes ♪

♪ I've made a few ♪

♪ I've had my share of sand
kicked in my face ♪

♪ But I've come through ♪

♪ And we mean to go
on and on and on and on ♪

♪ We are the champions,
my friends ♪

♪ And we'll keep on fighting
till the end ♪

♪ We are the champions ♪

♪ We are the ampions ♪

♪ No time for losers ♪

♪ 'Cause we are the champions ♪

♪ Of the world ♪

♪ I've taken my bows ♪

♪ And my curtain calls ♪

♪ You brought me
fame and fortune ♪

♪ And everything
that goes with it ♪

♪ I thank you all ♪

♪ But it's been
no bed of roses ♪

♪ No pleasure cruise ♪

♪ I consider it a challenge ♪

♪ Before the whole human race ♪

♪ And I ain't gonna lose ♪

♪ And we mean to go
on and on and on and on ♪

♪ We are the champions,
my friends ♪

♪ And we'll keep on fighting
till the end ♪

♪ We are the champions ♪

♪ We are the champions ♪

♪ No time for losers ♪

♪ 'Cause we are the champions ♪

♪ Of the world ♪

♪ We are the champions ♪

♪ Champions. ♪