Girlboss (2017): Season 1, Episode 13 - The Launch - full transcript

Hey.

Anyone catch the
sunrise this morning? Ah.

It just keeps getting
later and later every day.

- I got you a coffee, K-dog.
- Permission to reject nickname?

Permission granted,
Kavarooney. Ooh, there it is.

- Found it.
- [Kaavi] You found nothing.

[Annie] Well, well, well.

Did someone heed my advice and clamp
her puss around a good attitude?

Hey, why shouldn't I
have a good attitude?

The launch is in ten days. We've
already found our hundred pieces.

Kavarooney's finishing up the site.



[Kaavi] Please stop.

And you are going to be
throwing us a sweet-ass party.

Uh, yeah, I am. My entire day
is devoted to the playlists.

I need a pregame, a throw-down, a
post-game, a chill mix, a step up...

Don't forget "It's 3 a.m., get
out and throw your cups away,

I ain't your mama" mix.

Why not just turn the music off?

Because that would be
party suicide, Kavarooney.

Oh, yeah. That name's gonna stick.

["I'll Come Crashing" playing]

♪ Nothing in my nature Tells
me not to do bad things ♪

♪ I know that I really should be... ♪

Let's not stop at 100 pieces.

- We should add more.
- How many more?



Ten, 20, 50, however many we can find.

Let's not stop at this stubby dick.

Let's make it bigger. I
don't care how hard it is.

[chuckles] Man, that thing
just keeps paying off.

[laughs]

Yeah, I'm a magnet at parties.

Because of my approachable face,

and people sense a vulnerability
in me that's just not there.

So, does that mean that
you're coming or not?

You haven't RSVP'd yet.

[scoffs] Oh, God. "RSVP."

"Hello, the '80s called.
One moment, I'll check.

Is there a Poindexter here? No?
He's moon-walking with Webster?" Mm.

[both chuckle]

- I understood none of that.
- Well, good.

'Cause you'd be in tears right
now, it's such a cutting remark.

Oh. Okay.

["I'll Come Crashing" playing]

♪ Nothing in my nature Tells
me not to do bad things ♪

♪ I know that I really
Should be good tonight ♪

♪ There's a kind of satisfaction... ♪

But I guess I'll come
to your little gathering.

- See you soon.
- Bye.

[chuckles]

♪ I'll come crashing down ♪

♪ In the ash of a fire rack ♪

[cell phone buzzing]

♪ I'll come crashing ♪

♪ I'll come crashing ♪

♪ I'll come crashing down
In the ash of a fire rack ♪

♪ It feels ♪

♪ Nothing matches the passionate
thrill Of desire, oh ♪

♪ Fuck, yeah ♪

Shane cheated on me.

Whew.

God, I haven't said that out loud yet.

I thought I could make it to the
launch without dealing with it.

But I'm losing my mind.

I just can't stop thinking about it.

I'm sad.

I'm angry.

Embarrassed.

I feel so dumb.

And I don't have time to feel
any of those things right now.

Who the fuck is Shane?

My boyfriend.

I told you about him a few months ago.

Oh, right.

- You two kept things "cas."
- Yeah.

It wasn't, though.

[chuckles] It never is.

You know, I tried that once.

You remember those two Black Panthers

at the '68 Olympics who
raised their fists in protest?

- No.
- Open a book.

Jesus.

Anyway...

It was with the white
guy who came in second.

We kept things "cas"
in that Olympic Village.

We kept things real "cas."

I wish I could un-see it.

It doesn't work that way.

You know what you need to do.

I don't want to break up with him.

Then forgive him?

I'd rather you slap me.

I mean, I can't even look
at him in the... [groans]

My God, with those sandpaper hands.

Feel better?

Not at all.

Exactly.

You have to make a choice.

Yes, I would like catering
for 20 to 200 people,

and we don't have much money.

So, uh, do you have
any inexpensive options?

Okay. Does that broth
come in different flavors?

Just cow.

[banging]

[Annie] Hold on. Hey.

Hey.

I'm on the phone.

Oh, sorry.

[Annie] And, um, how
much would that cost?

Hey, you.

Under the stairs.

Hidden away like the
family embarrassment.

I like your artwork. It's
useless and impractical.

Thank you. [chuckles]

Yeah, Annie says that
everything you see before you

was inspired by that piece.

So, she wanted me to bring
it in as a gift to Sophia.

This conversation has reached
a natural stopping point.

I'm gonna turn away now
so I can get back to work.

You work here?

I didn't know they were hiring.

- Hey. Are you guys...
- [shushes]

Um, you know what? I think I'm gonna
have to charm my way into Costco

and call it a day. Okay.

- What?
- What?

What? What do you want?

- Oh, is now a good time? Oh.
- Yeah. Mm-hmm.

I wanna help with the launch.

Oh. Well, thank you. But
I think I have it covered.

Oh. Please?

I'm in between passions right
now, and my days are empty.

I mean, how many games of Uno can I play

with my mother before
we both lose our minds?

The answer is siete seis.

Well, I could use some help
decorating for the party tomorrow.

You got it. Say no more.

Oh, God, I'm excited. [laughs]

- [Annie] Hi, yes...
- Hey, girl.

Did you hear?

- We're gonna be hanging out together.
- I'm gonna need a name first.

Try to guess.

- Bradley.
- Ooh.

No, but could you imagine?

Keep guessing.

- Tyler?
- [imitates buzzer]

- Mark?
- No.

Mm... Jim?

♪ I know I'm down ♪

♪ I'm gone I'm comin' round ♪

♪ I know I'm down ♪

- Can I help you with something?
- Yeah, I need to speak with Shane.

Are they almost done?

Just about.

♪ I know I'm down ♪

♪ I'm gone I'm comin' round ♪

♪ I know I'm down ♪

♪ I'm gone I'm comin' round ♪

- Hey, Shane. Somebody's here to...
- Yeah, it's me.

Sophia.

Your girlfriend.

You know, the thing
you needed to call me

so that you didn't turn into a
lying, cheating, fuck-face scumbag.

- [man] Oh, shit.
- Sophia, I, um...

[Sophia] How could you do this to me

during the most important
time of my career?

Of my life.

- And you called me selfish?
- Yeah, I... She... I...

- How do I mute this asshole?
- [Shane] Sophia, I can expl...

I don't want your excuses.

I don't wanna hear how
it was a one-time thing,

like there's something special
about a rehearsal studio.

Like you just happened
to succumb to your urges

in this tiny, shitty room
with your emo music playing.

And you, with the guitar.

I'll always remember you
as the girl on her knees.

And you're gonna have
to tell your kids that.

Or maybe you won't. Kids are perceptive.

They know when Mommy's a slut.

Oh, boy. You're bringing the kids in.

You're right. That was
too far. This is on Shane.

But still, woman to woman...

so not cool.

Sophia, please.

Two years of my life wasted on you.
I'm not gonna waste another second.

[Annie] I can't believe
he did that to you.

It was so rough.

I was like, "Oh. There's my boyfriend.

And that's a girl sucking his dick."

[laughs]

[Sophia groans]

[groans]

Oh, my God. I would've
panicked. [coughs]

I would have gone full To
Catch a Predator on his ass.

I would've been like, "Freeze,
motherfucker. You're going to jail."

[laughs] Well, this is what I did:

- That's also good.
- [laughs]

- Yeah.
- That's what happened.

[Annie laughs]

No, it's...

It's all good.

And you know what? I...

- I wish him the best.
- For reals?

Yeah.

Yeah, I just hope he doesn't
do it to the next girl.

That's a pretty adult
thing you just said.

Thank you.

[glasses clink]

[squeaks] This is some strong-ass shit.

[coughs] It tastes like the sun's piss.

[Annie coughs, then grunts]

Holy shit.

My life looks so different.

It's pretty crazy.

Tomorrow's the day.

The big launch.

Sophia, this is the night
we're gonna look back on,

- when we're old.
- Yeah?

And our boobs are in
totally different places.

[both laugh]

And we're reminiscing
about the good old times.

Just sitting on the floor.

So innocent.

So much ahead of us.

Okay, stop talking about the moment.

Talking about the
moment ruins the moment.

Oh, okay, but on my deathbed,

I'm only going to think of two things.

- Oh?
- This night...

and when Kelly Clarkson
won American Idol.

I fucked a firefighter that night.

[both laughing]

I don't care about Kelly Clarkson.

[both laughing]

- [Sophia] We ready?
- [Kaavi] All that's left is to go live.

- Just click there.
- I can't believe it.

This moment is here.

Everything that we've worked
toward. It all comes down

to pushing this one button.

- Can I push the button?
- Jesus, how long have you been here?

Hush. It's Sophia's night.

- [Sophia] This is it.
- [Annie] Oh, my God.

I could just...

Here goes nothing.

Congratulations.

You're live.

[humming fanfare]

I'd have felt real dumb if I'd
sprung for those big scissors.

- Okay. What do we do now?
- You just sit and wait.

It's all very anticlimactic.

- How do we see what's sold?
- Site admin page.

Use your log-in. All transactions
and user comments are logged there.

Now, please, can I
just go to the bathroom?

- Of course. No one knew you had to go.
- Thank you.

[rapid clicking]

Sophia.

- A watched pot never boils.
- Well, I mean, eventually it'll boil.

It's just boring to watch, and
it doesn't speed up the process.

You're right.

For my own sanity,

I should just try to enjoy tonight.

Yeah. Whatever happens, happens.

Yes. Good.

[exhales]

[dance music playing]

So?

What do you think?

You really went for it.

Yes, well, I thought it would take
me years to discover my new passion,

but it just took one afternoon
and a trip to Party City.

Hmm. Is your new passion streamers?

No. It's helping you.

No, no. I really believe
in what you're doing here

and I want to be a part of it.

I mean, it must be kismet.
You launching your site,

me leaving the art world.

Buy-one, get-one-free streamers.

I mean, these are all
signs. Oh, unrelated. Um...

Here's the receipt.

And no, you don't have to
reimburse me immediately.

There's a Snickers on there.

I got really hungry while
I was waiting in line.

You don't have to pay me for that.

Just really thrilled to be here, again.

It was a king-size.

I'll pay for the Snickers, Nathan.

Oh. [scoffs] Only if you want to.

So, excited for the party?

I'm only staying to make sure
the website runs smoothly.

Oh, no. Come on. Hey!

- Let me make you a drink.
- No, thank you.

A U.K. medical journal
showed that out of 20 drugs,

alcohol was the most harmful.

What are you talking about?
There's only like six drugs.

Pot, cocaine, acid and like three more.

Well, I guess my drug of choice

is the enjoyment of
seamlessly integrating

JavaScript on the client side
with a Python backend framework.

- Let me guess. No "plus one"?
- Well, well. [chuckles]

Doesn't this place look like the
inside of a piñata's butthole?

Rick!

- [Rick] Hey.
- You made it.

Aw, yeah. I always like to
be the first one at parties.

That way you get your
pick of parking spots.

My pickup truck is right outside.

Hey, if you ever have a large
pile of soil that you need to move

from one location to
another, I'm your guy.

- Just in case that ever comes up.
- [Sophia] Yeah.

I don't know why it would, but, uh...

Anyway, am I dressed okay?

- These are my going-out slacks.
- You look good.

Hey.

It's really great to
see you again, Rick.

Ah, yeah, sure. Yeah.

- You don't remember me, do you?
- Nope.

[Rick and Sophia chuckle]

[Rick] I remember this one.

You've done pretty
well for yourself here.

I mean, look at this place.

You know you have a bat's
nest up there, right?

[Sophia] What? Bats? Oh.

Kaavi? Does this look right to you?

No.

That doesn't look right at all.

Sophia, you're gonna
wanna take a look at this.

Holy shit.

[rock music playing]

We motherfucking sold out!

[crowd cheering]

- [Sophia] Yeah!
- [man] Speech!

[crowd] Speech! Speech! Speech!

If you want! If you want! If you want!

- If you want!
- All right, all right.

[clears throat]

Uh...

You know, I guess...

not that long ago, I didn't
think that I needed...

anyone's help but my own.

But the truth is...

I wouldn't be here without all of you.

- You're welcome.
- [Sophia] At every fucking step...

you were there for me.

So, um...

In the beginning there were two sets
of footprints and now there is one

because you were all carrying
me. Thank you. Enjoy yourselves.

Toast over, I'm done.

Well, don't let that moment linger,
child. Turn the music back up.

- [rock music playing]
- [crowd clamoring]

["I'll Come Crashing" playing]

♪ Nothing in my nature Tells
me not to do bad things ♪

♪ I know that I really
Should be good tonight ♪

♪ There's a kind of satisfaction
That destruction brings ♪

♪ Consequences never could convince
me That I should do right ♪

♪ I'll come crashing ♪

♪ I'll come crashing ♪

♪ I'll come crashing down
In the ash of a fire rack ♪

♪ It feels ♪

[sobs]

[exhales]

[Sophia] Just...

- Do you want a drink or something?
- I'm good. [clears throat]

So, how did the launch go?

I don't wanna talk about that.

So, um...

I needed to see you...

because, uh...

I don't know why.

I thought that I was over you.

But I'm not.

And...

I cared about you so much.

Like, more than you think I did, maybe.

I don't even know if
I know what love is,

or how to love someone back, but...

You hurt me so bad.

Um...

Yeah. That's...

all I needed to say.

What were you thinking?!

What, was it because
I didn't go to Chicago?

I'm sorry. I had shit
going on, okay? And you...

You pretended to be
so fucking supportive.

Oh, my God. And then
you just fucking lied.

You just kept lying to me. Texting.

Texting me to come over like
nothing fucking happened.

Did rehearsal even go late?

I mean, is there even an album?

You're so beautiful.

Stop it.

God, I fucked up.

Yeah.

You did.

What difference does it
make? She means nothing to me.

Yes, but it matters to me, okay?

I can't move on until
you tell me every detail.

Did she kiss you first?

Did you kiss her first?

- Was it happening the whole time?
- No, of course not.

When did it start?

- I told you.
- Tell me again.

[sighs]

Can I be honest with you?

Yeah.

I really hate that fucking song.

[Shane laughs]

- Me, too.
- [chuckles]

[panting]

[Sophia sobs]

[Sophia crying]

All right.

You gotta go.

I don't want to.

If I walk out that door, I...

Please just let me stay
for a few more minutes.

Sophia, please.

Just a few more minutes.

[Passion Pit's "Dreams" playing]

♪ Oh, my life ♪

♪ Is changing every day ♪

♪ In every possible way ♪

♪ And my dreams ♪

It's never quite as it seems ♪

♪ It's never quite... ♪

[woman 1] When are you
getting more stuff?

[woman 2] Nasty Gal is the bomb.

[woman 3] Can you expedite my purchase?

[woman 4] Get more things, nasty bitch.

[woman 5] Totally rocking
stuff, can't wait for more.

- [woman 6] I want to cancel.
- [woman 7] Is this pocket...

- [woman 8] You have the coolest shit.
- [woman 9] Amazing stuff.

[woman 10] I want everything
that you want to sell.

[woman 4] Get more things, nasty bitch.

Here we go.

♪ Hey! ♪

♪ I want more ♪

♪ Impossible to ignore ♪

♪ Impossible to ignore ♪

♪ And they'll come true ♪

♪ Impossible not to do ♪

♪ Impossible not to do ♪

♪ And now I tell you openly ♪

♪ You have my heart, so don't hurt me ♪

♪ You're what I couldn't find ♪

♪ Hey! ♪