Gilmore Girls (2000–2007): Season 6, Episode 22 - Partings - full transcript

- Is she still asleep?
- Yeah, so let's be super quiet.

- Super quiet, Davey.
- Super quiet, Son.

Like we're playing a game called
"Let's Be Super Quiet,"

- and you win a prize if you're super quiet.
- A prize!

Let's get him out the door.
Let's get him out the door.

Lunches! Come on, Davey!

Come on. Let's get your lunch.

- Lunch is fun.
- Here you go. Go give it to Daddy. Okay.

Come to Daddy, Son.

We're still playing
the "Super Quiet" game.

So, did she say anything else to you
after I went to bed?

Not a word.

We sat, we had tea, but she was
somewhere else the whole time.

Don't open the door, Davey,
the door's loud.

Okay, let Daddy open the door.

I'm worried about her.

If she wanted to talk about whatever it is,
she would have talked.

I know what it is. It's Luke.
I just... I don't know the specifics.

There, let's go.

- Be very quiet going out the door, Davey.
- Super quiet.

- You're gonna win the prize.
- It's gonna be a super fun prize.

- Close the door for me?
- Got it.

Great job, Son! High-five!

- Morning, Taylor.
- Good morning. Some weather, huh?

If you don't like it, just wait five minutes.

Top of the day to you, Mrs. Harris.
Say hi to Maurice for me.

Will do.

- That's another good one.
- No, it's not.

Hold it.

Yo, Alfred Stieglitz, stop with the pictures.

I prefer Cartier-Bresson.

My eyes are pale,
very sensitive to the light.

You only graduate from college once,

and I will document it
to my heart's content,

and you can't stop me.

At least I'm clothed in these.

Oh, yes, those shower photos
will fetch me a bundle on the Internet.

I don't even know why I'm doing this.

Why am I doing this,
this whole cap-and-gown thing?

Because the graduation ceremony
is not only for the graduate.

It's for the loved ones, too.
We talked about this.

- No, you talked and I disagreed.
- And then I ruled, and that's that.

I'm taking that Stalin biography
away from you.

Come on. I don't wanna be late.

You do realize you're putting yourself
in the crosshairs?

Meaning?

There will be all manner of Huntzbergers
in the audience.

I can avoid people with the best of them.

I didn't say "people."
I said "Huntzbergers."

Don't you worry
your pretty little head about this.

- I'll take care of myself.
- Just want you to be fully prepped.

I have outdone myself photographically.
Every one of these is a keeper.

Okay, that's a close-up of my naked butt.
That's not a keeper.

You're right. That's a screen saver.

Well, hey there, Taylor.
Fancy seeing you here.

- I live here.
- Beautiful.

Is everyone seeing
what's going on out here?

Lucas, have you eyeballed the chicanery
that's taking place outside?

- What? Eyed what?
- Balled, eyeballed these hooligans.

How interested do I look
in talking to you, Taylor?

- Not very.
- And this is the very peak of my interest.

My God, there's another one.

- I have a theory, Taylor.
- Let's hear it.

Our usual town troubadour,

he was discovered last week
on these very streets.

Discovered?

Some big-time music manager
was limo-ing through town

and he caught
one of the troubadour's songs.

Gave him an opening slot
on Neil Young's tour.

- Who's Neil Young?
- One of The Monkees.

Anyway, I'm guessing that when word hit
the East Coast troubadour community,

every one of them thought
to come to Stars Hollow

for their shot at the big time.

There's an East Coast
troubadour community?

Oh, yes.
Our wandering musical storytellers.

It's an honored American tradition,
going back to the Puritans.

Geert Schoonhoven delighted
his fellow Pilgrims with his timely songs.

His most popular was
A Beaver Ate My Thumb.

It's quite catchy.

I wonder if Neil still does
Last Train to Clarksville.

I love that song.

Excuse me. Bohemian people,
may I have your attention, please?

- Kind of doing a song here.
- It won't take long.

Please, people, your attention.

I would just like to say
that there is no bigger fan of music

than the man standing before you.

No memory is more precious to me

than the one of my father

taking me to the Hartford Civic Auditorium
to see the great Pat Boone.

But you, my friends,
do not have the talent of Pat Boone.

And if you insist on loitering
and playing your hippie, doo-wop music

to the obvious detriment
of the mercantile interests of this town,

our authorities will forcibly remove you

with water hoses and canine units,
if necessary.

Thank you for your time and goodbye.

Can you say "BTK"?

Oh, shoot.

- You're grounded.
- Sorry, Mom.

Kimmy saw this guy at the mall
who was a total Chachi,

and he bought us a Slurpee,
and we totally lost track of time.

I called you twice. I left messages.

I called the National Guard

who didn't answer
because they're all in Baghdad.

Well, I just checked my messages.

- I won't be ignored, Dan.
- I know. I'm hiding my rabbit as we speak.

- So, what's the deal?
- No deal.

I spent the night at Sookie's last night.

- Why?
- No reason.

We were talking and it got late,

so I crashed on her couch
and woke up covered in jam.

- Is everything all right?
- Everything's fine.

- How's it going with you?
- Well, Logan graduated.

Oh, that's right. The graduation.
Wow. How was it?

I'm here now. It was nice.

Logan looked great. Very dignified.

He didn't trip.
He remembered to wear pants.

- He's quite a catch, that guy.
- I was very proud of him.

I'm just waiting for him
to extricate himself from those people.

Oh, his parents are there, huh?

Yep. They are with Logan,
and I am standing a good 50 feet away.

As per the restraining order.

They're dragging him out for drinks,

30 minutes tops.
We're meeting back at the apartment.

And then he'll be all mine.
I've got the whole afternoon planned out.

You're such a girlfriend.
You should take him to the mall.

I'll think about it.

- So, you take pictures?
- Only about a thousand.

I'll bring my camera tonight.

Oh, listen, just a heads up,
I might have to duck out after drinks.

No. Why?

I've made reservations
at this really crappy Italian restaurant

with Chianti bottles
hanging from the ceiling,

and the husband and wife
that own the place

wind up screaming at each other
after 8:00. We love it.

Sounds great.

Well, it's our last night together
for a while.

- I want it to be really special.
- Sounds perfect.

Okay. I better get back.
I'll see you tonight.

Okay, hon, see you tonight.

Hello, Babette.

- Hi, buddy. Where's Babette?
- Oh, she had to go, honey.

I told her I'd take the morning shift.

She told me to tell you
that everything went fine.

Paul Anka ate all his food,

and then he did something weird
with your nightgown.

Oh, are you cross-dressing again?

I got here at 7:30.

I gave him a little kibble and a new hoof,

and he ran around the house a few times
and then passed out in the corner.

He's been quiet ever since.

Thank you guys for doing this, Patty.

Paul Anka's never spent
the whole night alone before.

Oh, it's our pleasure, sweetheart.

So, you're staying out all night, huh?
Anything illegal?

Oh, no, no. Just a little girls' night out.
Or in, I should say.

Sookie and I had a slumber party.

- Oh, that sounds fun.
- Yeah. Do you want some coffee, Patty?

Oh, no, sweetheart. I need to get going.

I'm teaching a cardio striptease class
at 10:00.

I have to make sure
that those poles are screwed in tight.

Okay.

- Lorelai? You here?
- Tell him... Tell him I'm not here!

- What?
- Patty, please, tell him I'm not here.

- Lorelai?
- No, no, but I...

- Luke! Hi!
- What the hell are you doing here?

Oh, if I had a nickel
for every time I heard that.

- I'm looking for Lorelai.
- Well, she's not here.

Her Jeep's right out front.

Well, all I know is that she called
to have me come over and feed Paul Anka.

- Called from where?
- Oh, I don't know. The inn, maybe.

No, she's not at the inn. I tried the inn.

Well, I don't know.

You know,
half the time people speak to me,

I'm thinking about Baryshnikov.

- Did you see Turning Point?
- No.

- Oh, that man was so beautiful.
- Yeah, I'm sure.

Pure sex walking. Or flying, actually.
That man could fly.

- Have you ever thought of taking dance?
- Me? No.

Well, maybe
you might wanna think about it.

There's nothing sexier
than a man in tights.

Yeah, I'm sure that's true.

- Look, can you just tell Lorelai I came by?
- Oh, of course I will, honey.

All right,
stop imagining me in tights, Patty.

It's a free country, honey.

- He is so easy.
- Thank you, Patty.

Something going on with you and Luke?

It's nothing. We had a little fight.
Nothing big, I'm just...

Punishing him. Good for you.

The longer the freeze-out,
the better the make-up.

Yes. Exactly.

- Listen, thank you for doing this.
- Oh, sure, anytime.

If you need anything else,
just give me a call.

- I will.
- And, honey, don't freeze him out too long.

Luke is a much better man
than my first husband or second husband.

But he's neck-and-neck
with the third one, though.

Okay.

Bye, Paul Anka.

Thank you for letting me
scratch your butt for an hour.

Just like husband number 4.

Bye.

...be there for at least
the first two months.

- You met him in Omaha.
- I remember.

He runs the department,
so he's the one to see.

He's a good guy. He's got 20 years.

- Oh, I gotta go.
- Yeah, I'll talk to you later.

Yeah.

Yeah.

- Hey.
- What happened?

- It took longer than I thought.
- Way longer.

And I've got to leave for my grandparents',
like, right now.

To top it off,
just as the family thing is winding down,

a bunch of Dad's business automatons
came by

- and he made me stay to talk shop.
- To talk shop?

Synergy in new media ventures
and increasing shareholder value.

- I could hear my soul dying.
- He's doing this on purpose.

- I wouldn't put it past him.
- Why is he doing this?

Look, don't think about him. Just go.
Go to your thing. Get it over with.

- I'll wait for you here. Go.
- Okay.

No more thoughts about Mitchum.

- You're right. No more thoughts.
- Go.

Yeah, at this number.

Here. Call me back. Bye.

Oh. Hello, Rory.

Were you at the ceremony?
We didn't see you.

Yeah, I was there.

- Didn't see you.
- Well, I was there.

Did you know that Logan and I
had plans to go out after the ceremony?

- I mean, were you aware of that?
- No, I was not.

Yeah. 'Cause why would your son
wanna go out with his girlfriend

- the last day before he leaves, right?
- Rory...

And this gathering of yours,
it turns into a business meeting

on his graduation day.

As if Logan's not gonna have
enough time for that

during the year that you're forcing him
to do in London.

It wasn't exactly a business meeting.

- Why are you doing this?
- Doing what?

Why are you taking him away from me?
Why? Do you hate me that much?

- I don't hate you.
- Yeah, right.

- Why would I hate you?
- Because I'm dating your son.

Logan's love life is his own business.
I don't get involved.

Oh, please, you have done nothing
but get involved.

- How?
- You're sending him away.

5,000 miles away.

What other reason is there
but to separate us?

Well, you flatter yourself
if you think I put that much energy

into thinking about your relationship.

- Here's the lobby.
- Wait, let's get this clear right now.

I'm sending Logan away for one reason,
because it is time.

It is time for him to stop
jumping out of planes in a gorilla mask

and crashing boats and getting plastered
every night and ending up in the hospital.

It's time for him to stop being a child
and to start being a man.

It's time for him
to start focusing on his future,

and the only way he is gonna do that
is to get him out of his environment

and away from those dopes,
Colin and Finn

and the Life and Death Brigade,
and get him on a path.

Logan is talented. He's talented.

He's my son.
I want him to achieve something.

And he needs a push. It...

It's what my father did with me.

He pushed me, I grew up,
and now Logan is gonna grow up.

Anything here you're not agreeing with?

I didn't think so.

- Got your mail here, Taylor.
- Thanks, Cliff.

I guess a last group of miscreants
didn't get word

that troubadours are persona non grata
in Stars Hollow.

Just one more rat I have to exterminate.
See you, Cliff.

Gerta, you're half my age.
Why do I always beat you to the door?

- Hi, Mom.
- Hello, Lorelai.

So, just you tonight?

Well, I know how mad you get

when I bring
the Insane Clown Posse with me.

- So, no Luke.
- Luke's working.

All right.

- So how are we?
- We're good. We're fine.

We're starving. We'd love a drink.

Your father's making martinis
in the living room.

Oh, now your legs work.
Here, hang these up.

And eat something with sugar!

That's it. I'll take care of the rest.

Just say whatever it takes
and get him out of there.

About 9:30. I trust you, Finn.

No, it's not a surprise that you've
never heard anyone say that before.

Just get Colin,
and get him out of there. Bye.

Sorry, everyone. I'm off it for good now.

- Hello, Lorelai.
- Thanks, Dad. Hello.

- What's this?
- Don't touch that.

He slapped my hand earlier.

- It is top-secret.
- Oh, my God.

It's the weapons of mass destruction.

- Quick! Get the President on the phone.
- Lorelai.

If he's not in the Oval Office,
try the ice-cream room.

Just tell them what it is, Richard.

Well, it looks like we're going to receive
a tidy little settlement

from the charlatan
that botched your mother's eye surgery.

A very tidy settlement.

And we have decided to add it
to the money we're donating to Yale.

Oh, thank God.
Finally a hot meal for the lacrosse team.

We're adding it to the money
that we're donating in Rory's name.

Oh, goody, they didn't forget.

And with that extra money,

we can now afford
what is on the table right in front of you.

- Richard, do the honors.
- All right.

Miss Rory Gilmore, may I present

- your building!
- What?

Your science building.

On the QT, a friend of mine
who knows the architect

snagged the model for me.
It's a beaut, isn't it?

- Built perfectly to scale.
- Very sleek.

And there's plenty of wall space inside
for a portrait.

- Of who?
- Of you.

And look right here.

My friend attached a placard
to the front of the building.

"The Rory Gilmore Astronomy Building."

Grandpa...

They're going to start construction
this summer,

so it should be up and running
by Christmas.

Is this the actual lettering?
I mean, is this to scale?

I don't know.
Although the style is very dignified.

I'm sure we can request this lettering
if you like.

It's your building, so why not?

Because the lettering
would be 30 feet high.

Well, honey, it's the astronomy building.
You have to be able to see it from space.

I don't know whether it's to scale.

Well, is there someone
we can call to check?

Relax, Rory. She's so modest.

Relax, Rory.

Remember when you wanted
a personalized license plate?

So much better.

We're going to try to get them
to add another floor

so that it's taller
than everything around it.

- Make it stand out a bit more.
- More than this?

- I love the portrait idea.
- Who's not helping?

Excuse me, everyone,
Christopher Hayden has arrived.

- Ah, Chris!
- Christopher, how wonderful.

- Come in, come in.
- How are you?

- What are you doing here?
- I was invited.

Shut up! Me, too!

We promised Christopher

a home-cooked meal
last time we saw him,

and since we're leaving for Europe
for the next two months,

this was the last chance
we had to make good on that promise.

You can call a Gilmore many things,
but you can't call him a welsher.

What are the things you can call him?
Just for future reference.

I'm very grateful for the invitation, Emily.

- Martini, Christopher?
- Sounds good.

- What's this?
- Oh, it's Rory's building.

- It's not my building.
- It's got your name on it.

- Wow, are those letters to scale?
- Oh, boy.

- 'Cause it's gonna be huge.
- Yeah.

Okay, Dad, you can take my seat
because I have to go

legally change my name
and transfer to Brown.

Honey, now come on, we have teased you
way worse than this before.

Remember when you were 10
and you thought you discovered U2?

I should get going.
Logan's leaving in the morning.

Oh, that's right.
Well, tell him to have a safe trip.

I will.

My goodness, it's Grand Central Station
in here tonight.

Come on, Rory, I'll walk you out.

- Bye, honey.
- Bye.

- Christopher.
- Thank you.

So he's leaving, huh?

Yeah, he's going to London
to work for his dad.

- She should be very proud of that boy.
- She should.

She should buy him an observatory.

Well, look who I found outside.

- Oh, Carolyn.
- Hello, Richard.

How wonderful to see you,
especially standing so close to a martini.

Oh, Carolyn. That sense of humor of yours.

One martini, coming right up.

Carolyn, this is my daughter, Lorelai.
Lorelai, this is Carolyn Bates.

Lynnie to those in the know.

- Oh. Am I in the know?
- Well, you are now.

- Nice to meet you.
- You, too.

- And, Lynnie, this is Christopher Hayden.
- Nice to meet you.

- Lynnie, olives or a twist?
- Olives, please.

Lynnie's mother and I go so far back,
I'm embarrassed to talk about it.

Lorelai, you remember my talking
about Marie Randall.

We were roommates in college.

Well, Lynnie is her daughter
and she just moved to Hartford.

So, of course, we promised her a dinner.

And since we're going to be out of town
for the next couple of months,

tonight seemed
like the perfect opportunity.

Tonight she's settling up
all old debts, huh?

Lynnie, I've got you two olives.

Thank you very much, Richard.

- Move.
- What?

- Move!
- Mom.

The arm's supposed to be connected
to the rest of the body.

Lynnie, you come sit down
next to Christopher.

- Lorelai's gonna sit with me.
- Okay.

You know, Lynnie is a psychologist.
Isn't that fascinating?

I do a lot of work with family counseling,
runaways, and drug recovery.

Arm-yanking rehab.

Lynnie just moved here from Maine,
isn't that interesting?

I've never been to Maine.
Christopher, have you ever been to Maine?

- No, but I like lobster.
- Well, then you're in.

I tell you, Lynnie, you're a card,
just like your mother.

Christopher, you should meet her mother.
She's a stitch.

- Isn't Lynnie's mother a stitch, Richard?
- She's an entire seam, Emily.

It's so important to find
someone who can make you laugh.

I was always so envious
of Johnny Carson's wives.

I just thought these women
must do nothing but laugh all the time.

- How's your drink, Lynnie?
- Oh, very potent. Thank you, Emily.

Well, potent is good
because tonight is a party.

Which reminds me, Christopher,

Lynnie once threw her mother
the most wonderful birthday party.

I think she made the cake herself,
didn't you, Lynnie?

Oh, these days a woman who can bake
is a rare treasure, isn't she?

And Lynnie's a Leo.

Stop. Go home. This is private property.

Stop that jumping right now!

There's no jumping in the town square!

Officer Ruskin, what took you so long?
I called you hours ago.

Well, I'm here now, Taylor.
What do you need?

Handcuff these ruffians
and take them away.

- In what?
- In your car.

- Well, I came on my bike.
- Why?

Fred took the car.
Plus, my handcuffs are broken.

Well, then find an appropriate vehicle
to haul them away.

My sister has an SUV,
but she's out of town, though.

Well, then line them up
and have them follow you to jail.

Well, I could do that.
Oh, but it's a single cell, though.

It holds two, maybe three,
if they're not fat.

- And we don't have any food.
- Oh, forget it, Barney Fife.

My brother has a Pinto.

- Patty, don't do that.
- But they're hungry.

If you feed them, they won't go away.

Taylor.

How did you let this happen?
This is my turf, Taylor.

How did I let this happen?
This is your fault.

You had to go off
and make it in the big time,

and now they're all copying you.

The big time?
I made 700 bucks and got booed.

And I never even met Neil Young.
Heart of Gold, my ass.

I suddenly feel very tired.

- Would you like a tiramisu?
- No, I think I'd just like to go to bed.

Tell everybody to try and keep it down.

God, I hate music.

- How old?
- Four going on forty.

And a doll, a living doll.

Well, enjoy them while their legs are still
short enough for you to overtake them.

That's good advice, Doc. Thanks.

Excuse me,
I'm just gonna go to the restroom.

- Well, hurry back. Dinner's almost on.
- Yes, ma'am.

- My sister just had twins last week.
- Twins. Wow! That sounds...

- Loud?
- Exactly.

I'm sorry, I know I'm being very forward,

but the picture of the two of you
sitting there, so young, so beautiful,

it's almost like looking at a shampoo ad.

Oh, my God! What are you doing?

What do you mean, what am I doing?

I thought "restroom"
was code for "Follow me

"and we'll talk about
how to get you out of this."

What the hell kind of spy school
did you go to?

Well, I'm here now, so let's figure out
how to get me out of this!

- Out of what?
- What do you mean, "Out of what?"

- This is a setup.
- So it seems.

I can't believe Emily would do this.

You're talking
about Emily Dickinson, right?

'Cause Emily Gilmore was made to do this.

I thought I was having dinner
with you and Rory.

I didn't realize I was going on a date.

Well, luckily you didn't get ugly overnight.

And thanks a lot, by the way.

- What did I do?
- Nothing!

You're just sitting there.
You're not saying anything.

What are you talking about?

When Mom said,
"Doesn't he look like Cary Grant?"

I said, "Yes."

- You're just letting this happen.
- I'm not just letting this happen.

You can't see
that I'm miserable out there?

No, I can't. You seem fine.
You're talking to her.

She's talking to me.

What am I supposed to do,
slap her in the mouth?

That would be a conversation-stopper.

I assumed at some point
you'd jump in and try and save me.

- By doing what?
- I don't know, deflect, distract,

get the conversation off her
and me and us.

Well, I'm sorry.
I didn't know you needed saving.

- Oh, come on.
- Oh, "Oh, come on"?

How do I know you don't wanna date her?

You're single, she's single,
you're pretty, she's pretty,

it's how all great divorces start.

How did I used to get out of here?

- What are you talking about?
- In high school, I'd be in your room,

I had several ways of sneaking out of here.

Chris.

Which drainpipe was it
that I used to crawl down?

Christopher!

I think you used to get to it
from the attic window.

Does the attic window still access

the drainpipe
that drops you off by the garage?

You do know you're grown up now.
You can just walk out the front door.

Oh, if I just leave, I'll insult your parents.

But vanishing into thin air,
way more polite.

It's only 8:00.
This night's gonna last forever.

We haven't even had dinner yet.

Relax.

Now that I know
you're not interested in her...

I'm not.

Okay. Now that I know, I can help you out.

- You will?
- Yeah. I got your back.

- Okay. Thank you.
- You're welcome.

- I know you always got mine.
- Always.

- Oh, so it wasn't code, you know, I got to...
- Yes. Right.

- I'll see you back in the living room.
- Yeah.

- Very interesting dinner, Emily.
- It's paella.

I got the recipe from Hildy Mclntosh,
whose son married a Spanish girl.

God knows how long it's going to last,

but the food at their wedding
was wonderful.

- Do you like it, Lynnie?
- I do.

- Not too spicy?
- I like spicy food.

Do you?
Well, Christopher, did you hear that?

Lynnie likes spicy food and so do you.
Isn't that something?

Yes. Small world.

Hey, Lynnie, I have a recurring dream
where a walrus

waddles up, lies down on me,
falls asleep and I can't breathe.

- What do you think it means?
- Lorelai!

What? Dad, Lynnie is a psychologist.
She should know.

It's okay. It could mean a myriad of things.

Too much stress at work,
something in your life is strangling you,

you've read Alice in Wonderland
too many times.

- Touché, Lynnie.
- She's got wit and wisdom, this one.

You know, Christopher does

the Sunday New York Times puzzle
every single week.

Hey, what's it called
when you're afraid of spiders?

- "Arachnophobia."
- You have arachnophobia?

- No.
- Thank goodness.

What's it called when you're afraid

of people who are afraid of spiders?

- 'Cause that one I've got.
- Oh, lord.

I don't think
there's a technical term for that yet.

How about arachnophobia phobia?
'Cause that makes sense.

- You know, Christopher, Lynnie...
- Voices in your head, totally normal, right?

- Excuse me?
- There's only two that speak English.

Lorelai, eat your paella.

- So, Christopher, how's business going?
- It's really been picking up lately.

- What do you do?
- Oh, I'm in computer software.

- Well, that sounds exciting.
- Can be. It's a lot of traveling, actually.

I love traveling.
It's one thing I really miss about my job.

You know what I think
is even better than traveling?

Time traveling.
Do you think that's possible?

I would have no idea.

Lorelai, are you having
some kind of breakdown?

- You're very quiet, Christopher.
- Well, I...

Lynnie, as a psychologist, tell me,
what do you think of The Sopranos?

- Actually, I miss Adriana.
- Oh, so do I.

- Lorelai!
- What?

- I was serious about that one.
- That's it. No more talking till dessert.

Dude, can you do that...

- Come on. One more stop.
- I can't.

But tomorrow you'll fly away to London,
and we will forget all about you.

I'm touched,
but Rory will be back in a minute.

You know, I'm starting to get the feeling

- you'd rather be with her than with us.
- Impossible.

I appreciate the drinks and the diversion.

Your friendship over the years is worth

at least a couple pages in my memoir,

but, as of now, it's goodbye.

I'm spending the rest of the night alone
with my girl.

Hello, governor, chips?

- I'm sorry, I was looking for my girlfriend.
- Oh, I'm sorry, mate. No girlfriends here.

Just us birds and blokes
taking the piss out of each other.

- Your accent is terrible, by the way.
- Just go with it, you geezer.

Now, we have heard that
you're about to fly away to Old Blighty,

and word round the pub has it
you're not terribly happy about it.

Well, I'm leaving
a couple people I'm pretty fond of.

And some people I'm a little afraid of,
but all in all...

Well, we're just gonna have to
change your mind

because London, you see,

is a place of fun and musical excitement,

the Queen, HELLO! magazine...

You're gonna break into a chorus of
Chim Chiminey any minute, aren't you?

Shush now. None of that talk.

Because tomorrow,
brilliant things will happen.

A new life. A new adventure.
You like adventure, don't you, mate?

Well, London is certainly
the place for that.

And we, frankly, would not be
the fine chaps we claim to be

if we did not send you off in a proper way

with the bash of a lifetime!

Come on, someone get this chap a pint!

You see, if you can't be happy,
at least you can be drunk.

Kiss me, Mary Poppins.

Really? I thought it was more
Gwyneth Paltrow, Shakespeare in Love.

- Kiss me.
- To the Queen!

To the Queen!

- Well, that was a complete waste of time.
- What are you talking about?

I'm talking about Christopher and Carolyn
leaving separately.

Well, come on, Mom. What did you think?

They were gonna throw down
and consummate it right here in the foyer?

No, I didn't think they were going to

"throw down
and consummate it in the foyer."

I just thought they could go out
for some coffee.

- You served them coffee.
- So what?

So you can't be shocked
when you serve people

three cups of coffee

and they don't feel like going
out for coffee. Not everyone's me.

I just thought they would have
hit it off better than that.

- You never know with these things.
- I was just so sure.

- Oh, well. Maybe next time.
- Absolutely.

Christopher's probably
too immature for Lynnie, anyway.

I'm sure he is.

The way he was going on and on
about that motorcycle of his.

I half expected him to start talking
about his Tonka truck

and announcing to the room he wanted
to be a fireman or a cowboy someday.

Sure is nice when it's not me.
All right, bye, Mom. Have a nice trip.

Goodbye, Lorelai.

- Gerta, did I fire you?
- No.

Really? Everything's off tonight.

You also know that it is one meal,
and one meal does not a lifestyle make.

That's okay, Sandra. All right.

Okay. Call anytime.
I'll talk to you on Monday.

- Sorry. I'm blocking you in.
- No, no. It's okay.

So you do sessions over the phone?

I do sessions whenever people need them.

Wow. That's quite a commitment.

Well, I've always been a good listener,
excellent note-taker.

I have fantastic penmanship.

Good head-nodding abilities.

- You found your calling.
- I think I did.

- So it was nice meeting you.
- Oh, you, too. You, too.

This was... This was really
very, very sweet of your mom.

Well, you keep thinking that.

Hey, it's been a long time since
I've been invited to such a blatant setup.

It made me miss my own mom.

I'll just let it go to voicemail.

Boy, your work
sure follows you around, huh?

Yeah. Well, when you're going
through something, you never know

when you're gonna need to talk.
Sometimes it sneaks up on you.

Yeah. I suppose so.

- You okay?
- Me? Yeah, yeah. I'm good.

It was really nice meeting you.
Sorry if I talked too much during dinner.

Every now and then,
I just feel the need to reenact

certain key scenes from Purple Rain,
you know, for a captive audience.

The Lake Minnetonka scene
really bugs my mom, so...

I could analyze that one for you
if you want.

That one I've got a handle on.

Other things are more fuzzy,
but that one, that one I got.

Okay.

- Lorelai?
- Yeah?

Do you...

- Do you wanna talk about something?
- Me? No. No. I'm good.

It was nice meeting you. Bye. I gotta go.

My parents have been married
for 40 years.

And that's, like, mind-blowing for me

because there is no one worse
at communication than my mother,

except my father
and most of my relatives.

It is not a chatty group, basically.

Everything in the Gilmore house was,
"Don't talk about it. Shove it aside."

And, of course, I talked about it
and shoved it right in your face.

But still, I don't know,
I never saw myself getting married.

- Never?
- Not until Max asked me. I think.

I mean, I guess I thought
about marrying Christopher

when everyone was freaking out
because I was pregnant,

but I never thought about it
in a longingly good way.

- That could be why.
- Why?

Well, marriage was just a solution
to a problem,

not anything romantic
or because you were in love.

Plus, it came from your parents.

I love that I've got one more thing
to blame my mother for.

What about Max? Did you love him?

No, I didn't.

I wanted to, but I didn't.

I don't think I ever really loved anyone
until Luke.

Did I tell you I proposed?

- No, you didn't.
- I did.

I saw this guy in front of me
who was a real man.

He was solid and he was strong.

He would protect me, but he got me.

I knew all that when we started dating,

but that moment when I realized
how much he cared for Rory, that was it.

Suddenly I knew I was ready.

- Did he accept right away?
- Pretty much.

Hey, where's the weirdest place
you've ever had a session?

Skull Mountain at Six Flags.

- So, not this?
- Nope. Not this.

Well, not only have I screwed up
your night, but it's not even a good story.

- It's still a pretty good story.
- Yeah, that's good.

'Cause I like to entertain, you know.
I should have been a monkey.

Washington Square Park
with, like, a snappy hat.

I feel so stupid.

I really had myself
believing it was gonna happen.

Bought that stupid dress, and now
it's just hanging there, mocking me.

And the crazy thing is,
I am ready to get married.

I am ready to start
the next phase of my life.

I want another kid,
and I don't wanna wait anymore.

I don't want to be patient.
I've been patient long enough.

I'm not happy,
and I feel crappy all the time

and I just think I've had it.

So, what are you gonna do?

Only you can make you wait.
Nobody else can.

You need to decide what you want and
what you're willing to give up to get it.

And then you gotta be okay with that,
or you gotta be okay with waiting.

I could lose him if I push too hard.

You don't really seem to have him now,

at least not the way you wanna have him.

You won't get anything
unless you ask for it.

Then if you ask for it and you don't get it,

maybe it wasn't worth having
in the first place.

Some things are just never meant to be,
no matter how much we wish they were.

I can only imagine what you could do
if you had a couch.

Wanna put money
on who nails the Queen?

I think Her Highness is pretty safe tonight.

- Why? I thought Jenny and Paul broke up.
- They got back together this morning.

- Do the boys know?
- No.

- Are you gonna tell them?
- No.

Wow! Watching your best friends
waste precious scoring moments.

You can get kicked out of the club for that.

Yeah, well...

You know, I have given
a lot of great parties in my lifetime.

Oh, I know.

But I do believe
that this one has topped them all.

Hey, it's not over. We have hours to go.

There's plenty of beer left,
and no one's slugged Finn yet, so...

- Thank you.
- My pleasure.

- You want more beer?
- No.

- More Twiglets? Cadbury's?
- I'm good.

Do you wanna try the frug again?
'Cause I think my cramp has gone away.

Tell me not to go.

- What?
- Tell me not to get on that plane.

Tell me to blow off my father,
the paper, the whole Huntzberger destiny.

Just tell me
I can figure something else out.

Just tell me not to go.

Well, I can't do that.

Hey, are you afraid
the teacher's gonna see you or something?

No. I can't just charge you
for half a cup of coffee.

But I'm not gonna drink the whole cup.

Seems like a gyp.

Hey, I need to talk to you.

- Where have you been?
- It doesn't matter.

What are you talking about,
"Doesn't matter"?

I've been looking everywhere for you.

I tried your cell, I went by the inn.
Patty was at your house.

- Let's elope.
- What?

- Come on, Luke. Grab your keys, let's go.
- Elope?

You said that would be fine
at Martha's Vineyard.

Didn't you say that would be fine
at Martha's Vineyard?

- Yes. I did, but I'm just...
- Come on, then let's go.

We can drive to Maryland.
What the hell, right?

I mean,
you have to see Maryland eventually.

We can drive there and get married

and then come back here
and you get your stuff and you'll move in.

- Okay, hold on.
- I mean, we have the plan already, right?

- We just have to put the plan in motion.
- Yeah, let's calm down.

We don't have to figure all this out now,
do we?

Yes, we do!
Because we've been waiting and waiting

and putting it off
and I don't wanna put it off anymore.

- Yeah, but right now?
- Yes! Now is the right time.

It's the best time because it's now!

- Come on.
- Your car or mine?

Lorelai, let's just talk this through.

No, I don't wanna talk.
All we've done for months is talk.

I wanna do. I wanna go.

Yeah, well, we can't just take off
and get married.

- Why not, Luke? Don't you love me?
- You know I do.

But I love you, Luke. I love you.

But I have waited and I have stayed away

and I have let you run this thing
and no more.

I asked you to marry me and you said yes.

Yeah, I'm just trying to think here.

We fixed up the house, right?
We have a bigger closet

and I didn't get the purple wallpaper

because you didn't want
the purple wallpaper.

And if it's between you
and the purple wallpaper,

I pick you. I pick you!

I didn't tell you
not to get the purple wallpaper...

- Oh, my God! You didn't like it.
- I don't care about wallpaper.

- Do you care about me?
- Yes.

Because I'm going crazy here.

I made a commitment to you
and I need to make it happen.

It will. It will happen, okay?
I just have April to consider.

But once we're married,
everything with April will be fine.

- Anna said so.
- Anna said so? What does that mean?

- When I talked to Anna, she...
- When did you talk to Anna?

- After the party, I...
- I didn't know you talked to Anna.

- You weren't supposed to talk to Anna.
- I know, I'm... God!

No, I'm not gonna defend myself!

For months now I've been skulking around,
not saying anything,

not having an opinion on anything,
like I'm Clarence Thomas or something,

and I'm done with that.

I've been waiting for a long time,
and I don't want to wait anymore.

- I have to think this through.
- No!

I have April!

You're gonna have to figure out
how April fits into our lives,

- not the other way around.
- I'm trying.

Well, try married.

- Just wait!
- No. I'm not waiting!

- It's now or never.
- I don't like ultimatums.

I don't like Mondays, but unfortunately
they come around eventually.

I can't just jump like this.

Well, I'm sorry to hear that.

And I have to go.

- Hey.
- Hey.

You okay?

I'm having a really bad night, and

I just don't want to be alone, okay?

Yeah. Come on in.

Rory.

- Logan?
- Don't get up.

You're dressed.

- Why are you dressed?
- My bags are already in the car.

- The car?
- It's downstairs. I just wanted to tell you...

I'll be five minutes!

- I just have to find the closet.
- Relax.

- I'll just grab shoes and a coat.
- No.

- No shoes. Just a coat.
- You don't have to come.

You're leaving.
I have to go with you to the airport.

- No.
- I have to go to say goodbye.

- Rory, no.
- Yes!

I have to wave to you at the gate.

They won't let you come to the gate.

They'll stop you at security.

Okay, well, I'll wave to you
at the metal detectors.

- Rory.
- I have to go with you.

- No.
- Yes!

You are leaving for London.

Who knows
when we'll see each other again?

- I thought that was all set.
- What was all set?

Christmas, Thanksgiving, Guy Fawkes Day.

- That's so far away, I...
- Rory,

if you come with me,
I won't get on the plane.

I've paid for the apartment
for the next year,

so you don't have to worry about that.

There's still a few weeks left
on the car service,

so use it whenever you want.
I know that you won't,

but just in case you need to.

I'll call you when I get in, okay?

What?

I keep trying to think
of fabulous things to say,

but all I can think is,

say hi to William and Harry for me.

I love you, Ace.

That's so much better than,
"Say hi to William and Harry for me."

I have to go.

- G.G., come get your coat.
- Not that coat. The pink coat.

- Miriam, where's the pink coat?
- She doesn't have a pink coat.

G.G., come back here!

- Who's that?
- That's your aunt Lorelai.

- Is she sick?
- No.

- Miriam...
- Sorry, Mr. Hayden.

I don't like to wear my nightgown to bed
when I'm sick, either.

I'll explain later. Have fun at school.
Bye-bye, hon.