Gilmore Girls (2000–2007): Season 7, Episode 1 - The Long Morrow - full transcript

Picking up on the day after last season's finale, Lorelai wakes up in bed with Christopher. Confused and mortified, she makes a hasty exit, ignoring Christopher's pleas that she stay. Once at home, Lorelai tries to get rid of everything that reminds her of Luke and ends up practically emptying her house. Rory receives a toy rocket ship as a parting gift from Logan and is baffled as to its meaning. She decides she should join him in London for the summer, only to learn he has bought her a ticket for a visit at Christmas.

Hey.

Hey.

What are you doing?

Um... go back to sleep.

Come back to bed.

Oh, I can't. I got to go.

Stay.

No, I can't -- Paul Anka.

Oh, there's no way he's
performing this early.

Check your tickets.

No, I got to go
home and feed him.

Well, let me make
you breakfast first.

No.

Come on, you're no good to Paul
Anka if you collapse from hunger

before you feed him. It's like how,
when you're on an airplane,

you put on your own oxygen
mask before your kids.

- It seems selfish, but --
- No.

Chris.

Lore.

Really.

You sleep.

I got to get going.

- You sure?
- Yeah.

Okay. Bye.

- You're back!
- Ohh! God, Babette, you scared me.

Yeah, it's my voice.
It frightens the hell out of people.

I don't know what
to do about it.

Well, you could start by not
hiding in people's houses

and leaping at them
when they come home.

- It's the nodules.
- Who?

It's the nodules on
my vocal chords.

The more I strain my voice,
the more they grow.

It's nature's way of trying
to get me to talk softer.

Babette, one. Nature, nada.

I bet you're wondering
why I'm here.

Yeah. I mean, not that I'm not happy to
see you. It's just that I have to --

- I'm not a sleepwalker.
- No?

- In case that's what you were thinking.
- No no.

'Cause a lot of people figure
me for one, god knows why.

- I guess I got the look.
- Well, you didn't sleepwalk, though.

Huh-unh. But this morning
I came over here wide awake

'cause I heard Paul Anka doing
that weird yodeling noise

that you said he does when he's hungry,
so I fed him.

Oh good, thank you.

Yeah, I gave him a half a cup of
that kibble that you said he likes,

but then he looked at me like
I stole something from him,

so I gave him a whole cup.

I know that look.
It can be intimidating.

And since our washing
machine is broken --

Morey put his boots in
it and broke it again --

I thought I'd do a
load of my intimates.

Good for you.

- You ain't got any messages.
- What?

- He didn't call.
- Who?

I heard about the fight
between you and Luke.

You did?

Yeah. You know Adrian
Bittenberg's daughter, Becky?

She got a huge mouth.

- Becky is not a gossip.
- But she has a huge mouth.

And she and Eileen Whitewin
were behind Doose's market

seeing how many devil dogs
Becky could stuff in there,

and when she got up to four,
completely cut off her oxygen.

So Eileen went running over to Luke's
to see if she could get some help,

and then she saw the two of you in
the streets screaming at each other.

Well, I'm glad she had the presence
of mind to listen in on our argument

while her friend was
choking to death.

Don't you worry about a thing, honey.
Everything will be fine.

Every couple needs a good
blowout once in a while.

- It keeps you on your toes.
- Oh, yeah, well...

Yeah. So, did you spend the
night at Sookie's again?

Sookie's?

Yeah, I figured you were there,

but Morey and I did a
power walk this morning,

and we went by her and Jackson's place,
and I didn't see your jeep there.

Babette, I really
got to get going.

Oh, I'm just waiting
for my panties to dry.

I'll pick them up later.

Okay, but could you do me a favor and
put them in a delicate-spin situation,

30 minutes with a
bounce dryer sheet?

Oh, and don't worry, sweetheart.
He'll call.

They always do.

Do you want your kid to spend her life
behind the counter at Dunkin' Donuts?

- Do you?
- No.

Because that's where
she's headed --

selling chocolate donuts and glazed
fritters for the next 40 years

to people in business suits who actually
gave a crap about their academic future.

I just want her to get
into a good school.

She has such potential.

So did Charles Manson.

- What?
- Look at her.

Frankly, it may
already be too late.

I don't particularly like to take
on such meek, diffident cases.

Do you even know what
"diffident" means?

That's okay.
That knowledge isn't really required

in the retail
doughnut-distribution industry.

Please, just give her a chance.

- Why should I?
- Because she needs this.

- Mom.
- Caitlyn.

- What do you think?
- She's got a "C" average,

which means she's
either lazy or stupid.

I can work with either.

Frankly, sometimes
stupid is easier.

I can scare the stupid out of you,
but the lazy runs deep.

- So you'll take her on?
- I will.

- Wonderful.
- Mom!

Caitlyn. Thank you, Paris.
You won't be sorry.

Okay. Now, if I can get you both
to take these aptitude tests,

then we can get to work.

Why do I need to take a test?

I need to get a realistic sense
of Caitlyn's true potential,

and genetics is by far the
most reliable indicator.

I'm sorry?

Basically, I need to know how much of this
is her fault and how much of it is yours.

Ticktock.

What is this?

Pretty great, huh?

Not for Caitlyn.

I was gonna spend the summer
tutoring for the Princeton review,

but then I found they charge
these little morons $60 an hour

and only pay their tutors $20.

So I figured,
"who needs the Princeton review?"

I can open up my own shop.

I've already subcontracted out
to three other student tutors,

and I've got more
prospects lined up.

I'm gonna make a fortune.

Hey, are you interested?
The pay's $15 an hour.

No, thanks.

Wait. Are you looking to use
the offices over the summer?

Just because you're the editor,
that doesn't entitle you

to use the offices during the summer.
There's no paper to put out.

These were up for grabs,
and I grabbed them.

Paris, I don't
want the offices.

Oh. Then,
what are you doing here?

I just came in to
back up my files.

You already backed
up your files.

I saw you do it.

Oh. I get it.
Logan's gone, huh?

He left this morning, early.

- Breakups are tough.
- What?

Eyes on your own
paper, Marilyn!

- We didn't break up.
- You didn't?

No. Why would you say that?

I don't know. Wealthy, good-looking,
hedonistic heir to billion-dollar,

multinational media
conglomerate moves to London

and spends nights pining away
for his college girlfriend?

Who's watching that movie?

Paris, it's not like that.
We're together.

So you guys talked about it?

Yes. Well, no --

I mean, I'm gonna go visit him, though.
We talked about that.

- When?
- I don't know exactly.

So what, specifically,
did you agree to?

Well, nothing, really,
but it was kind of understood.

Yeah. Because that worked
out so well the last time.

Paris.

Has history taught you nothing?

You're in limbo, sister,
no man's land, quite literally.

Logan is not that bright.
You need to spell it out for him.

He's got to know where
the red lines are,

or he's gonna leap right over them and
into bed with multiple british floozies.

Paris, it's okay.
Logan and I are fine.

He moved to London, Rory --
the most romantic city in the world.

Paris is the most romantic
city in the world.

Oh, right.
London is just the most sex-obsessed.

Pencil's down!

Hey.

I can't. I'm late for work.

Can we talk first?

Please, I really don't want to.

Lorelai, come on.

No, Luke, we did talk.

We talked last night.
There's nothing left to say.

I'm sorry about yesterday, but you
kind of ambushed me, out of nowhere,

and then you didn't
give me a chance.

I gave you every chance.

You were going so fast.

Yeah, that's me. I'm fast.

I'm the perfect storm of
caffeine and genetics.

I know, but now I've had a chance to
catch up, and I want to discuss it.

Discuss what?
There's nothing left to discuss.

Us -- you and me.

There is no us.
There's you, and there's me. It's over.

It was over last night,
and it's over now. It's over.

- Lorelai --
- No, I'm sorry. I have to go.

- You're going down.
- No.

You think you're so great.

- You think you're miss la-di-da.
- Ow.

But look at you now,
all weak and pitiful.

That's it. Give in to the pain.

- So, how's my acting?
- What do you mean?

Well, is it believable, or do you
find it a little over-the-top?!

My fingers!
My fingers are smashed!

Ha! How do you like
them apples, Michel?

I do not like these apples.
You cheated.

You hustled me.
You played possum.

Oh, no, I played arm-wrestling.

Or did you think we were
playing some other game?

Is that why you lost so bad?

Your gloating is
very distasteful.

Ouch!

Lorelai, I may need to take some
time off to have my wrist x-rayed.

Excuse me.

I am the champion, my friend

And I'll keep on
fighting till the end

No time for losers

Oh! I am a
fantastic arm-wrestler.

You know what I think did it?
The whisking --

all those years of whiskin has given
me incredible forearm strength.

People are always like, "why take
the time to hand-whip fresh cream?

Why not use a machine?"

And I've always been like,
"I don't know why I do it.

It's just something that
I do." But now I know --

because I've been training
for this very day.

I mean, wow! I am strong.

And the omelet flipping
definitely is part of it.

You know when you use one of those
really heavy cast-iron skillets,

and you flip, flip?

I mean, that's all in the wrist,
you know?

And that's what they say.

You know, that's what people
say about arm-wrestling, too --

that it's all in the wrist,

and, man, I have super-bionic,
superpowered, super wrists.

I mean,
who knew I possessed such --

Honey?

Something's wrong, huh?

Yeah.

It's not spiders
on the ceiling.

You know I hate spiders.

I was kind of hoping
it was spiders.

It's not spiders.

- No?
- No.

Okay.

Luke and I are over.

- Over?
- Yeah.

- No.
- Yeah.

- You guys had a fight?
- We had the fight.

People have fights. It's okay.

It's good, actually.
You know, it's healthy.

If you don't have fights,
all these bad chemicals build up,

and you get ulcers
and bad skin.

You got such pretty skin,
so you have to have some fights

for the sake of your skin.

This was different.
This was bad.

People have bad fights.

Every bad fight can
seem like "the fight."

It wasn't just a fight, Sookie.

It was him not fighting for me.

I gave him an ultimatum.

- And?
- And he let me walk away.

No. He'll come back.

He'll be back. He'll come back.

Luke wants to marry you.

I know he does.

I mean, he'll come around.
He'll get it together.

I'm done.

I don't want to see him anymore.
It's over.

I get that you're mad.
You deserve to be mad.

Luke's been a real jerk.
Frankly, being mad at him

makes all the
sense in the world.

And if you're so mad that you need to
believe you guys are over, I get that.

Sookie, I spent the night
with Christopher last night.

You spent the night with
Christopher last night?

- Spent the night.
- With Christopher?

Yeah.

Okay. So, does Luke know?

No. I don't want
him to ever know.

That's good. That's good.

Uh, okay.

Uh, look -- things happen.

People... people do things.
It's not pretty.

It's not Disney,
but it's the real world.

And you don't have to tell him.

Luke doesn't have to know,
and things don't have to be over.

No, you don't get it.
I need it to be over.

I need it to be over because
I can't take this anymore.

Yes, I love Luke, and, yes,
I wanted to marry Luke.

But I didn't want a life
separate from Luke,

and that's all he could give me.
I don't want that.

If I'm gonna be with Luke,
I want to be with Luke,

and he didn't get it, and I waited.
I mean, god, I waited.

It's like Luke is
driving a car, okay,

and I just want to be in
the passenger's seat.

But he's locked
the door, and...

and so I have to hold onto the bumper,
you know?

I'm not even asking him
to open the door for me.

Just leave it unlocked and say,
"come in."

But no, he didn't do that,
so I'm hanging onto the bumper,

and life goes on,
and the car goes on,

and I get really badly
bruised and hitting potholes.

And it hurts. I mean, it hurts.

So yesterday I had to let go of the
bumper because it hurts too much.

It hurts too much.

Okay.

- Caesar, where the hell is Lane?
- She's on her honeymoon.

- Jeez, how long is that gonna last?
- It's only been a week.

Only? Seven days seems
like plenty of time

to sit in some mountain cabin together
and realize you've just changed yourself

to another human being
for all eternity.

They went to Mexico, so they're
probably doing that on a beach.

Maybe it takes a little longer to realize,
you know, with the hot sun and all.

Ceasar, are you being funny?

- You tell me.
- No, you tell me.

- It would appear not.
- Bus those tables.

Luke, I asked for these eggs scrambled,
and they're sunny-side up.

There you go.

Oh, now what?

Caesar, I'll be right back.

Don't hurry.

Now, carefully. Carefully.

That's rental equipment.
I'm responsible for that.

Taylor, what the
hell are you doing?

Good morning, Lucas.
You look in fine fettle today.

Okay, whatever you're doing,
stop it.

That's rather cynical. Now, who's
to say I'm not doing something here

that will surprise
and delight you?

- Are you?
- I highly doubt it.

- Then stop it.
- Can't do it, Luke.

The safety of the citizens
of Stars Hollow is at stake,

and that has to be
my top priority,

regardless of how you feel
about a red-light camera.

A what?

To catch scofflaws. Apparently, people
are viewing our traffic light here

as more a series of colorful
driving suggestions

rather than the
rules of the road.

Therefore, I decided to
install a red-light camera

to discourage drivers
who would test our laws

and photograph and
punish those who do.

A camera?

You run a red light, it's time
for your close-up, Mr. Demille.

These little wonders are
taking over the globe --

New York, Los Angeles,
Paris, Singapore.

That's ridiculous.

They're in position and ready for
the installation as you say so.

You can't do this.
It's an invasion of privacy.

Something to fear, Luke?

You can't take pictures of
people for driving by the diner.

It's probably not even legal.

Spoken like a man with
something to hide.

Luke, I can assure you that
I am well within my rights

as town selectman to
install that camera,

and you, of all people,
should be grateful.

After all, it'll make the street in
front of your diner that much safer.

Or unsafer,
if you know what I mean.

There hasn't been an accident
on that corner in 15 years.

And now we've made it safe
for the next 15. Hooray!

I'm gonna fight you
on this, Taylor.

We will be having the official
unveiling ceremony later this afternoon.

You're welcome to attend.

I don't see how I can avoid it, considering
it's right in front of my damn diner!

I'll put you down for plus one.

Oh, and we're going to have to
cross up some electrical lines

during the
installation process,

so you might lose
power for a few hours.

Hi.

What?! The prodigal
daughter returns.

What are you doing here?

I couldn't stay away.
I just missed you too much.

Aren't you the sweetest?
Isn't she the sweetest, Michel?

Beyond all human understanding.

Hi, Michel.

Yes, it hurts very much.

Yay! So you're back.

Yeah. I just had to
get out of there.

Aw. How was the goodbye?

Awful. There's nothing
good about a goodbye.

It's a very poorly named ritual.
It was a bad bye, a very bad bye.

Then I went to the newsroom
to talk to Paris about it --

You what?

Well, I didn't mean to.
She was just there,

and she spent 10 minutes
kicking me while I was down.

Paris is always there for you
in the most unfortunate ways.

I just miss him so much.

I know you do.

And it's only been seven hours.
Can you imagine when it's been --

You know what? I don't want to
talk about it. I need coffee.

Okay. You sure, though,
you don't want to talk?

You can always vent to me.
I'm the perfect vent-erizer --

vent-erator.

Mom, I don't need a vent-erator.
I just don't want to talk about it.

What's going on with you?

Oh. With me?
Oh, well, things with me --

things with me are good.

Convincing.

Things with me friends are good.
Things with me Inn are good.

- Things with me, not so good.
- What's up?

Look, I don't want to talk
about this right now, okay?

But I want to tell you. I have to tell,
but I'm barely holding it together as it is.

So if I tell you, will you
promise not to make me discuss it?

What?

Luke and I split up.

What do you mean,
like you got into a fight?

No, like we had a breakup,
like a real-life parting of the hearts.

Why? What happened?

Rory, you promised.

No, I didn't.

- Well, it was implied. Please.
- Mom.

Rory, I don't want
to talk about it.

- But you have to explain.
- No, not right now, okay?

Look --
you got to not talk about your thing.

So I didn't vent-erator you.
You don't vent-erator me.

- But --
- Rory, please.

Well, you know, I guess we
don't have to talk about stuff.

Yeah. Who says we always
have to be talking?

We can not talk.

Of course we can.

Okay.

We should probably talk about
how we're not gonna talk,

'cause I don't think we
should just go right into it.

Let's do something that
doesn't require talking.

Like, we could go
to the movies.

You want to try not
talking at a movie?

- Okay, shopping.
- Are you mad?

We could drink. We could go to
a bar and just throw back a few.

Yeah, 'cause drunk people
never feel like talking.

Oh! We could go to a club.

Yeah, 'cause all the hot spots
get rolling right about lunchtime.

See? This is why
men play sports.

- Sports. We can play sports.
- We hate sports.

We haven't tried every sport.

How about running?

We could easily talk
while we're running.

Not if we were hurdling.

Hurdles require more focus and,
thus, less talking.

Or we could do that
kind of running

that's like you leap around
a tree and up a hill --

You want to run cross-country.

Not across the whole country,
maybe just Michigan.

Michel, what sports
do you play?

Well, since I'm maimed
potentially for life,

I may never play sports again.

But think back to before this tragic,
life-altering injury,

when life was still worth living.
What sports did you play then?

Well, pilates, of course.

What?

It's like yoga with
cables and wires.

Sounds very dangerous.

Oh, racquetball is also
a fantastic workout.

- Racquetball?
- Intriguing.

I always liked the
sound of racquetball.

Tell us more about
this racquetball.

Well, it's very simple --

a 4-walled room, a racquet,
and a rubber ball.

Get to the good part.
What are the clothes like?

Can we wear cute outfits?

I do.

I think racquetball
sounds great.

- Mmm, I'm in.
- Okay, good.

Go home. And I need to finish
up a few things around here.

I'll see you there
in about an hour.

Deal. Yeah, fun.

Okay. And no talking.

Except for smack talking because I am
so gonna kick your butt in racquetball.

No no, I mean, my balls -- they're gonna
bounce way further than your balls.

Okay, well,
you haven't seen my great top...

- flick wrist --
- We'll learn the terms.

Okay, go home and study.

- Hello?
- Miss me?

Logan, where are you?

Heathrow. I just landed.

- I miss you so much.
- I miss you, too.

I've been here 2 1/2 minutes,
and I can already tell it sucks.

It does suck.
I've heard that about London.

You should just get on
a plane and come home.

You gave it a chance.

Are you on campus? I tried you at the
apartment, but I didn't get an answer.

No, I'm back at Stars Hollow.

That apartment suddenly
felt very big and empty.

So, what are you gonna do with
your first day of freedom?

Oh, going to play
racquetball with my mom.

This is a really
bad connection.

It sounded like you were gonna
play racquetball with your mom.

Hey, I could have a hidden
talent for it, you never know.

- So did you open my gift?
- Of course.

What did you think?

I thought... wow.

Yeah, pretty cool, right?

So cool.

Oh, I'm glad you like it.

Like it? I love it.

I'm so glad you got it.

Oh, yeah, totally.

When I left, I suddenly got worried you
wouldn't get it. But of course you got it.

Yeah, of course.
Of course, I got it. I loved it.

I knew you would.

All right, Ace, I got to go.

I just wanted to tell you I
touched down. I'll call later.

Okay, bye. And thank you.

Of course.

Like a remote-control rocket?

No, like a model rocket.

How big?

Is it filled with anything?
Gum or candy or anything?

Gum.

What? Rocket gum.
It could be a thing.

There was no gum in it.

It doesn't have a
button you can push?

No, nothing like that.
It's just a model rocket.

I mean, what could that mean?
Who gives someone a rocket?

I don't know. I don't know.
We'll figure it out, though.

Rocket, rocket, rocket.
Rocket man -- "Rocket man."

"Crocodile rock" was good. "Bennie
and the jets," "Candle in the wind."

Are you just naming
Elton John songs?

He is just so talented.

Ugh. What about space?

It's the final frontier?

- Oh, no.
- What?

What if he was trying to say that
he wanted space away from me?

No.

Oh, hi, we're not done racquetballing.
We've got it for like an hour.

Thanks, though.

Hey, maybe it's code.

Like I'm his rocket, right?

Like I'm his rock, E.T.

I'm his rock in the
eastern time zone.

That's dumb.

Yeah, like rocket gum
is sweeping the nation.

When I have made $1 zillion

from my rocket-gum invention,

you will eat those words.

Or more likely,
chew those words

and blow a bubble with them,
'cause did I mention

that rocket gum is bubble gum?

But instead of blowing bubbles,
it releases helium

that shoots the
chewer up into space.

I don't think this is
helping me understand

the state of my
relationship with Logan.

And we're not even
supposed to be talking.

- You started it.
- I did start it.

So maybe now you would
like to talk about Luke?

You know what,
I'd rather racquetball.

Seriously?

Come on.

What do you think?

Against the wall?

- Yeah, why not.
- Okay.

- Ready?
- Ready.

- You okay?
- Okay.

We're done.

See, it's starting to swell.

It is starting to swell.

Either that or the rest
of my face is shrinking.

I think we should
put something on it.

Uh, concealer and loose powder?

Ice, mom.
I think we should put ice on it.

So boring.
Neosporin and an eye patch?

Bactine, bacitracin, hydrogen peroxide.
Winnie The Pooh band-aids?

I'm getting you some ice.

Good lord.
Where'd I get all this stuff?

How can you not have ice?

You know I don't cook.

That is not cooking.
That is the opposite of cooking.

That's freezing. All you have in
here are like batteries and film

and something I think used
to be an ice cream sandwich.

- How old is that film?
- Ugh, 1999.

Bad hair year for me,
skirts were the wrong length,

cut me right at the calf.
I can't bring myself to develop it.

You're not putting
shaving cream on your eye.

No, just getting rid of
some of Luke's things.

- Steak.
- Huh?

Steak is supposed to be
good for a black eye.

Frozen peas.

Why would I put peas in my eye?

No, like a bag of frozen peas.
It molds to the contour of your face.

But steak has actual
healing properties.

Something about the juices or
the fats is good for the skin.

I'm going to Doose's
to get you some ice.

And steak. And peas.
And ice cream!

That would feel good on my eye.

And then when I'm done using it,
we can eat it.

It's black-eye dinner.

Says the woman who
can't cook ice.

Oh please. I'm not gonna cook.
I'm too injured. You cook.

And get some bacitracin. Whatever
we use it for, we're almost out.

- Be right back.
- Thanks.

See if he has eye patches.

Okay, everyone, gather 'round.

Witness the miracle
of modern...

Hey. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

What, does this look
like a soup kitchen?

Well, it's a little depressing,
but no --

- Pay your bill.
- Oh, right, sorry.

- I wasn't trying to skip out or anything.
- Get lost.

There's nobody left to serve,
and I certainly don't want your company.

Thanks, Luke.

Hi, miss Patty.
Hey, Gypsy. Hi, Lulu.

- Rory!
- Hi, Rory.

Look at the college girl.
You home for the summer, chicky?

I am

You look wonderful.

If I had known that college
was so good for the complexion,

I might have cracked a book
open when I was younger.

Oh, thanks.

Your mom said you might
be traveling in Asia.

She's not in Asia.

I didn't know you
were going to Asia.

I was talking about it,
but that's not gonna happen.

Well, your mom must be
happy to have you home.

Yeah, she is.
What's going on here?

Taylor's putting a camera
on the traffic light.

Big brother is watching.

Okay, everyone.
Thanks for coming.

Now, as you know,
small-town law enforcement

presents many challenges.

Chief among them, how to police our
streets without an actual police force.

Fortunately for the
citizens of Stars Hollow,

the fine people at Ingram Traffic
Systems have provided an answer.

I would now like to present

the latest and greatest weapon in
unmanned high-tech law enforcement.

Ladies and gentlemen,

the auto patrol P.R. 100.

How it works is very simple.

When someone drives
through the red light,

the camera will take
three successive pictures

of the offending party at
closer and closer range.

Seems kind of intrusive to me.

Law-abiding citizens have
nothing to worry about.

Now, we are going to have our ceremonial
first lawbreaker played by Kirk.

Kirk will drive my classic
1964 Ford Thunderbird

down the street,
through the red light,

and the auto patrol P.R.
100 will capture him

in all his law-breaking glory.

- Miss Patty?
- I'm on it.

I'm okay! I'm okay!

Okay, do you remember when
you begged me to go see

"The fast and the furious" with you,
and I said no?

And then you begged
me to go see

"The fast and the furious 2" with you,
and I said no?

Then "The fast and the furious 3:
Tokyo drift" came out...

They're cars, they drift.

And I was like,
"I said no to 1 and I said no to 2 --

"what do you think happened here,
I got a brain transplant or something?"

I remember. You were very rude.

Well, I was wrong,
because I have finally understood

the awesomeness of cars
crashing into things,

which is a long-winded
way of saying that

Taylor installed this red-light
camera in front of Luke's,

and Kirk was supposed to
demonstrate how it worked,

but he got totally
blinded by the camera,

and he ended up crashing
Taylor's fancy blue T-bird --

which, by the way, who knew? --

into the side of Luke's.

And nobody was hurt.
Everything was fine.

But the smash-up
was unbelievable.

And it went right into Luke's

and then Kirk gets up,
he gets out of thet car,

and he's all like, Evel Knievel style,
like, "I'm okay, I'm okay."

And... um...

why is everything you own in
piles all over the floor?

Wait a minute.
Into the diner and nobody was hurt?

Yeah, everything's fine.
But what is this?

There must've been a lot of damage.
Are you sure everybody's okay?

Oh, it was a mess, but everything's
fine, I swear. What is this?

I'm just getting some of
Luke's stuff together.

- This is Luke's?
- No, this is mine.

But I wore it with Luke when
we went to see "Jarhead."

I was trying to
look kind of army,

and something about the combination
of the movie and the hot dogs

at the Waterbury cineplex made
me sick in the parking lot,

and Luke held my hair, and it was nice,
and now I got to get rid of it.

Yeah, this pile
is Luke's stuff.

This pile is stuff that
reminds me of Luke.

What's that pile?

- Those are Babette's intimates.
- Of course.

So, all these books
remind you of Luke?

Yeah, those are books I gave
him to read, but he never did.

Cormac McCarthy -- good call.

"In cold blood" --
he would have loved that.

Well, he'll never know now.

You wanted him to read "Hammerhead
sharks -- demons of the deep"?

He recommended that one for me.

Pom-pom socks.

Al's Pancake World
takeout menus.

Hey, you're getting
rid of Bop It?

And a spatula? Why?

Oh, oh.
'Cause Luke used to make you breakfast.

He did, but that's not
why I'm getting rid of it.

Although now that you mention it,
the waffle iron has got to be dumped.

We have a waffle iron?

Don't get attached.
It's got to go.

Spatula?

We were having an
argument in the kitchen.

And he said it was a fight, and I said
it wasn't really a fight, it was a spat.

He said there was no difference
between a fight and a spat,

and I said there was a huge
difference between a fight and a spat

because a fight cannot be
diffused in the moment,

but a spat can easily be diffused
with the use of a spatula.

And I took the spatula out of the drawer,
and I whacked him with it a little bit,

and he started laughing,
and I started laughing, and...

now I got to get rid of it.

- Sad.
- I know.

Okay, what happened
between you two?

You have got to give
me something here,

because you cannot just say that
you don't want to talk about it,

because I saw Lukes today,
and I waved at him,

and I did not know how to act.

I mean, was it an "I hate you" wave,
or an "I'm sorry" wave,

or "I can't believe you wanted
my mother to shave her head

and become a moonie" wave.

He doesn't want me
to shave my head.

You shouldn't hate him.

There's nothing to
be angry about.

You knew we were having
problems, right?

The whole April thing and
postponing the wedding.

Finally, I got tired
of waiting for him,

so I gave him an ultimatum.

And he said no. So, that's it.

It's over.
Here I am, making piles.

The third stage of
grief is making piles.

Steak or peas?

No, no, no --
this is not my fault!

This is all your fault,
Taylor, all of it!

Lucas, I understand
why you're perturbed.

Perturbed? Do I seem perturbed?

I am so far past perturbed
that I couldn't look behind me

and see perturbed
with a telescope.

You never listen to
anybody, Taylor.

You just barrel along and decide
what's best for everybody,

consequences be damned.

Now, I grant you the ceremony today
did not go entirely according to plan.

According to plan?
There's a car in my diner --

a freaking car, Taylor.

A two-door 1965 Ford
Thunderbird in my diner.

Actually, it's a '64.

So, you do you think?
You want me to move it out or not?

I would really advise waiting
until our insurance agents arrived.

It's up to you, pal.
It's on your property.

- I don't know yet!
- You could have some sympathy.

After all, it's my car that crashed,
my most prized possession.

I mean, the paint job alone
is gonna cost me a fortune,

and who knows what other
damage has been done

or what my insurance
will or won't cover?

Well, maybe I'll come
back with a sledgehammer,

and you can tell them
you totaled the thing.

Luke, I would strongly advise
against any rash action

that could lead to undue
and costly litigation.

- How about now?
- Giant red spots.

Nothing but giant red spots.

How's it look
under there, Gypsy?

Well, the car is fine.

It definitely wasn't faulty
brakes that caused the accident.

Kirk is just an idiot.

Hey, I resent that.
Who was that?

Damn giant red spots.

What do you want
to do here, buddy?

You want me to pull the car out or
you wanna wait for the insurance guy?

I'm not sure what
I want to do yet.

I need to know now.
I can't spend all day here.

Either we move the car right now,
or I take off, you leave it in here,

and wait for the insurance guys.
You got to decide.

Look, do not pressure me, okay?
I do not like being pressured.

It's not one or the other.
I need to think.

Will you people just give
me some time to think?

- Soothing.
- Very.

- Zen.
- Thoreau, Walden Pond.

- Oh, I have an idea.
- Huh?

Maybe I should just go to Ikea.

- I like it.
- Yeah?

Maybe you can use it as the
basis for your redecorating.

Use it as a jumping-off point.
Make everything kind of gray and shiny.

Well, it doesn't remind
me of Luke at all.

Well, that's my problem.
It doesn't remind me of Logan either.

It's so frustrating.

Why don't you just call him?

I can't do that until I know what
this is, until I know what it means.

See, this long distance
thing isn't working already.

Rory, he just left.

Exactly, and I'm already
completely confused.

I mean,
I think we're still together,

but that's what I thought last
time we spent time apart.

I was 100% sure that we
were still together,

and he was 100% sure
that we had broken up,

and then he ended up sleeping
with those bridesmaids.

What is it you guys agreed to?

Well, that's just it.
Nothing, really.

I mean,
it was early in the morning,

and we hadn't had a chance
to decide on anything,

and we hadn't had the talk.

Now it's too late.

He's thousands of miles away,

and we talk on the phone,
but we don't really say anything.

And he's leaving me rockets.

Well, it's not too late.
He's been gone a day -- less than a day.

You guys will figure it out.

But it's hard on the phone, you know.
I can't see him.

I can't read his expression.

How am I ever supposed to know
what he's thinking or feeling?

I mean,
his eyes always give him away.

Logan has very expressive eyes.

I've noticed.

It's one of the things he and
Bette Davis have in common.

And sometimes he'll smile at me,
and I can tell exactly how he's feeling,

and now I can't.

So go to London.

- What?
- Go to London.

Go be with him this summer.

The two of you were supposed to go
traveling in Asia together anyway.

You don't have any plans for the summer,
so go.

I can't just go to London.

- Can I?
- Why not?

You two could have an amazing
summer together in London.

Pick up the phone. Call him.

I need to do some
more googling.

I'm going to bed.

- So Taylor's car is...
- In Luke's diner.

- Hello.
- Hey, how you doing?

Fine.

I'm just checking in.

Had a really great
time last night.

Don't worry.
This is not a booty call.

It can't be, 'cause you're not 18,
and it's not 1997.

Are you doing anything
tomorrow night?

'Cause I was thinking
maybe you could come over,

and I could cook us some diner.

Christopher.

Lorelai.

Let's not make more
out of it than it was.

So, you're saying last
night was a booty call.

I'm just saying,
I don't think it should happen again.

Oh.

Okay.

Well, I'm here for you
if you need anything.

You know that, right?

I -- yeah, no --
I appreciate... that.

Okay. I guess I'll
say good night.

Yeah -- night.

Okay.

I got it, I got it.
He loved her so much

he was willing to wait 40
years alone in space for her.

I got it. The rocket, I get it.

You do?

Yes. I have been googling rockets,
you know.

Rocket ships, rocket love,
rocket London, Logan rocket,

and let me tell you, it has not always
been a pleasant journey. People are freaks.

But then I found this blog,
rocket boy.

- Rocket boy.
- Rocket boy.

Knows a ton about rockets.
And as it turns out,

he's got over 200
classic L.E.V.s.

- L.E.V.s?
- Lunar Excursion Vehicles.

So then he tells me that
he hosts this chat-room,

and this is where
I get really lucky,

because rocketchamp465
was just logging off,

and I caught him,
and I described the rocket to him,

and he recognized it from one of
these episodes of "The Twilight Zone."

"The Twilight Zone."

So I clicked on "The
Twilight Zone" website,

and I found the episode,
and I got it!

I still have no idea what
you're talking about.

When Logan and I were
first going out,

we were in the pool house
one night really late,

and we were falling
asleep on the couch.

Wa wa wa.

- Mom.
- Sorry.

- Chachi, right?
- Proud.

- So, we were on the couch.
- Wa wa wa.

And this episode of "The Twilight
Zone" came on -- "The Long Morrow."

That's a bad title.

- That's not the point.
- I'm just saying.

So, there's this astronaut who was
supposed to go into space for 40 years,

but right before he left,
he met this beautiful woman.

But for those 40 years that
he was going to be in space,

he was going to be in
suspended animation.

So when he came back to earth,

he was going to
be really young,

but she would be really old.

So he goes into space,
and when he does come back,

the woman is still
young and beautiful

because she put herself in
suspended animation to wait for him,

but he's really, really old

because he took himself
out of suspended animation

so he could be old with her.

How depressing.

He spent 40 years alone in
space just waiting to see her,

and he was willing to come
back as an 80-year-old man,

giving up almost
his entire life

just to spend those last
few years with her.

Now, are you aware when you're
in suspended animation,

or is it just like
a really long nap?

Shush! The point is, that this is Logan's
favorite episode of "The Twilight Zone."

And when we watched
it together,

he said, "that's true love."

That's true love!

This is the most romantic
gift I've ever been given.

I mean, I have to call him.
I'm going to London.

I am going to London.

Yay!

But -- wait,
are you gonna be okay while I'm gone?

Yes, I'll be fine.

Okay, but we're going shopping
for linens before I go.

- Hello?
- Hey!

Hey!

I'm sorry for calling so early.
Did I wake you?

I'm actually at the office.

On a dare?

It's my first day, so I'm trying
to make a good impression.

So you're, like,
dressed and everything?

New suit, new shoes,
even brushed my hair.

How's the office? Is it fabulous?
Do you have a window?

I wouldn't say it's fabulous,
but I do have a window.

Can you see the queen?

Actually, my window looks
out on Piccadilly Circus.

So, you can just see
elephants and clowns

walking past your
building all day long?

- That must be nice.
- It's brilliant.

Brilliant? Oh, my god.
You're turning british.

Do you have a secretary
named Moneypenny?

My secretary's name is Steven.

- Steven Moneypenny?
- Yes.

So... I just wanted to
thank you for the rocket.

You already thanked me.

Oh, I know, I did,
but I wanted to do it again,

because I'm not sure I conveyed how much
I loved it in our last conversation.

I really, really loved it.

I'm glad.

I can't wait to come see you, Logan.
I can't wait.

- I already got you a ticket.
- You're kidding.

I got it right here. I was gonna fedex
it to you. You'll have it by tomorrow.

Oh, my god!

Yeah, so tell your mom you're
not gonna be home for Christmas.

Christmas?

Two weeks, just you and me.

I already cleared it with my dad.
It's gonna be amazing.

I'm still playing around with the
itinerary, but how do you feel about

- London, Paris, and Rome?
- Wow.

I figured we'd do a week in London,
then quick train ride,

and we do three days in Paris,
and we finish our trip

with a four-day
sojourn in Rome.

We still have enough time
for one last night in London

before you have
to fly back home.

Logan, that sounds amazing.

Oh, hey, I should take off.

My first staff meeting.
They're waving me in.

Oh, okay, good luck.

- Thanks, cheers.
- Cheers.

Uh... a car crashed into
my diner yesterday.

There's a giant hole
where my wall used to be.

It's gonna take a
couple of weeks to fix.

It's a disaster,
but I don't care.

I mean, I care, but...

You know what, no. I really --

I don't care.

It's like it's not
even real to me.

It's like my life
isn't even real to me

unless you're there,
and you're in it,

and I'm sharing it with you.

And, uh,
I don't know what I was waiting for,

and I don't know what I was scared of,
but I'm not.

I'm not scared, and I'm not waiting.
I'm here.

- Luke.
- No, don't say anything.

I've got a tank full of gas,
and Maryland is only 200 miles away,

and I've made us some reservations
at a couple of bed-and-breakfasts.

If you don't want to do the
Maryland thing, we don't have to.

I heard you say
"Maryland" the other day.

I don't know whether you were serious.
I'm just trying to cover my bases here.

- Luke --
- I also packed some camping equipment

so we can head to Vermont or Maine and,
you know,

check into a cabin for a week,
you know, like a little honeymoon thing.

But maybe that's a little
too rustic for your taste.

Or we could drive
to Atlantic City

or even Las Vegas if you want to
make a real road trip out of it.

Luke, stop.

I also did some research,
and we can also apparently

use a sea captain, if you want.

I'm not sure how big the boat
has to be for it to be legal,

but we can head to the coast,
and we can knock on some doors,

you know, boat doors.

Yeah, that's probably not
the most sensible way.

- Just stop.
- But, no, you were right.

Okay. I need to be faster. I need to
move faster, I need to think faster.

And, well, here I am.

It's over.

No, you can't say that.

You can't just say that it's over.
It's not over.

You can't just decide that it's over.
I'm in this, too, you know.

I'm not gonna let it be over.
You said, "be ready now or never."

I'm ready now.

- Luke.
- Let's go.

Let's do this.
Let's get married right now.

Let's go.

I slept with Christopher.