Gilligan's Island (1964–1992): Season 3, Episode 19 - Lovey's Secret Admirer - full transcript
Mr. Howell becomes outraged and jealous when he discovers that a secret admirer is sending letters to Mrs. Howell. But everyone is even more shocked when they discover that he's the one who's sending them.
Thurston,
are you asleep?
Thurston?
Thurston,
are you asleep?!
What?
Yes, yes, I was, dear.
I--having the most
terrible dream.
I dreamt I was
walking barefoot
through $1,000 bills.
You call that
a terrible dream?
Well, they were brand-new,
and they were hurting
my little tootsies.
Aww. I had a dream,
too, dear.
I dreamed that
somebody kissed me
on my cheek.
Oh, and
it seemed so real.
Well, why don't you
go back to sleep
and find out who it was?
What's that?
What's what?
That.
Oh, this that.
Hmm.
It looks like a note.
That's funny.
There's not one
under my pillow.
What does it say?
Oh, oh--nothing,
nothing at all.
Oh, nothing at all, eh?
Let's look at this.
"My darling,
just seeing you,
"just being near you
has given my life
new meaning.
"I don't know
how much longer
I can keep
my feelings to myself."
Lovey...
You have a secret admirer.
* just sit right back,
and you'll hear a tale *
* a tale of a fateful trip *
* that started
from this tropic port *
* aboard this tiny ship *
* the mate was
a mighty sailin' man *
* the skipper
brave and sure *
* 5 passengers set sail
that day for a 3-hour tour *
* a 3-hour tour *
[thunder]
* the weather started
getting rough *
* the tiny ship was tossed *
* if not for the courage
of the fearless crew *
* the minnow would be lost,
the minnow would be lost *
* the ship set ground
on the shore of this *
* uncharted desert isle *
* with gilligan *
* the skipper, too *
* the millionaire and his wife *
* the movie star *
* the professor and Mary Ann *
* here on gilligan's isle *
What was that for?
As if you
didn't know,
you sailor.
Well, sure
I'm a sailor.
Sweetheart
in every port.
What?
This is one port
you can forget about,
you overstuffed
sea wolf.
Just a minute,
Mr. Howell.
Tell me what this
is all about--
hello, captain.
Mrs. Howell.
Why don't you call
her "sweetheart?"
Sweetheart?
Girl in every port?
Say, what's
going on in here?
I suppose you
didn't write this.
Oh, captain,
I had no idea
how you felt,
but you really
must forget
about me.
After all, I am
a married woman.
"I don't know
how much longer
I can keep my feelings
to myself."
You don't think
I wrote that?
Deny it.
I dare you, deny it.
I deny it.
I, uh, assume
there is a reason
for this
irrational behavior.
Don't play innocent
with me, you cad!
Cad?
The quiet ones,
they're always
the one.
Tell me what this is about,
then we both know.
Mrs. Howell,
perhaps you can--
oh, Mrs. Howell--
really, professor.
You needn't
be so formal.
Formal?
The nerve!
Right in front
of my very eyes.
Aha! This is
some sort of joke.
Some sort of a joke?
Writing love notes
to my wife?
Oh, really, professor.
I never
would have guessed
that underneath
that calm exterior,
there lived
a seething volcano.
Well, he may be
a volcano, but
I'm going to erupt.
How dare you
write love notes
to my wife?
Oh, I already
did that.
Mr. Howell,
Mrs. Howell,
I realize that
you're both upset,
and obviously with
some justification.
However, I did not
write any notes.
Didn't you really?
I can assure you
that I am not
a seething volcano,
at least as far
as a married
woman's concerned.
Well, if you didn't
write the note,
and if the captain
didn't write
the note--
it must be...
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Are these your gloves,
Mr. Howell?
Don't try
and bluff me.
You're not the shy,
innocent little boy
that you
pretend to be.
Who'd do that?
None of
your excuses!
In a way, gilligan,
I'm very flattered.
Oh, you're so young.
I'll thrash you within
an inch of your life.
Oh, don't be too hard
on him, dear.
After all,
he's just a young boy--
a silly, wonderful boy.
There, there,
sweet prince.
Your lady fair
understands.
Sweet prince,
lady fair?
I'm just mad
about your last note,
you bad,
impetuous thing.
What note?
Let me see that.
"Dream girl, now that
you know my feelings,
do I dare hope
that you might
care for me, too?"
You'll need the red crosss
to care for you--
I didn't write
that note
or any notes.
You deny it, too!
Obviously
the three of you,
you gentlemen,
you deny it
because you're afraid
of incurring
the mighty
howell wrath!
But I won't rest
until I find out
who the culprit is!
Ooh, I've never seen
Mr. Howell so angry.
Isn't it wonderful?
And I found this note
pinned to my wardrobe.
That makes 5 notes in all.
Oh, whoever he is,
he certainly has
a crush on you.
You ever had a
secret admirer,
Mary Ann?
If I did, he sure
kept it a secret.
You ever had a secret
admirer, ginger?
I once had an
admirer who
had a secret--
a wife and 8 kids.
You don't know
who's writing
the notes,
so where are
the pink papers
coming from?
They all denied it.
Having a secret admirer
is rather fun,
but it'd be more fun
to know who he is.
Maybe I can
help you find out.
But how could
you find out if
Mr. Howell couldn't?
Confidentially, I
look a little better
in a sarong
than Mr. Howell.
[Whispering]
Okay, let's go.
Mary Ann,
I'm telling you
for the last time!
The skipper's mine!
Mary Ann: That's what
you think.
I thought he was
cute too.
I've just been shy
to say how I feel.
Well, you're late.
When I go
after a man,
I go after him.
It doesn't mean
you're gonna get him.
Are you kidding?
Listen, you farm girl
if you know
what's good for you,
you'll stay away
from my man!
Your man? Ha!
You think every man
looks at you
because you
wiggle your hips
like a pair
of windshield wipers?
Oh! One more crack
like that,
and I'll add
some black and blue
to your brown eyes.
That'll be the most
work you've done
since you've been
on the island.
[Whispers]
He's coming.
That did it!
That did it. Oh!
Hi, girls.
What's going on
out here?
Skipper, you do like me
better than ginger,
don't you?
Well, I like you both,
Mary Ann.
Well! If that's
your attitude,
you can have her.
Ginger, I had no idea
that you were so crazy
about me.
Oh, skipper,
I'd fight anyone
for you,
even Mrs. Howell.
Even Mrs. Howell?
You're the one who
wrote the notes?
Not me, but if
I'd write anyone a note,
it'd be you.
Skipper,
why don't you
write me a note?
Now, this lie detector
should prove conclusively
that I had nothing
to do with the notes.
Uh, yes. Exactly
how does it work?
I've wired the ship's
horn from the minnow,
and utilized the
batteries from
the radio.
If anyone lies,
the horn goes off.
Let's get on
with the questions.
I'm dying to know
who's secretly
in love with me.
Yes, tell a lie
so we can judge
the truth.
Uh, yes, of course.
Um, I should like to stay
on this island forever.
Never be rescued.
[Honking]
You see?
Ask him about me.
[Whispering]
No, in due time.
I must be crafty.
The idea is to catch
someone off-guard.
Uh, professor, uh,
what exactly
are your degrees?
I have a b.A.
From u.S.C.,
an m.A.
From s.M.U.,
and a Ph.D. from t.C.U.
Well, I don't know
anything about
your education,
but it sounds like
a marvelous recipe
for alphabet soup.
Alright, fire away.
You like brunettes?
You wanna whisper sweet
nothings into my ear?
You like redheads?
You planning to write me
some more love notes?
You like blondes?
Do you need
more pink stationery?
Yes, no, yes, no,
yes, and no.
There, you see,
I always tell the truth.
[Honking]
Alright.
Uh, gilligan,
were you
ever in love?
Yes.
What
was her name?
Herman.
Herman?
That's an odd name
for a girl.
Not if the girl's
a turtle.
Oh, gilligan,
be serious.
She was in love
with me.
[Honking]
I lied. She was
in love with
another turtle.
Alright, gilligan,
let's talk about
Mrs. Howell.
It wouldn't work.
Don't you see?
Gilligan's answered
your questions truthfully
about who he loved,
and it wasn't
Mrs. Howell.
But I've been
getting all those notes.
Somebody must be
in love with me.
Well, if none of us
wrote those notes,
it means there's someone
else on the island.
Someone else?
You mean a total
stranger
in love
with my wife?
We've simply
got to find out
who finds me
so fascinating.
I must know who
this mysterious,
frightening,
fiendish,
sweet stranger is.
Where are you
going, dear?
Oh, to fix my hair
and freshen my makeup.
After all,
one never knows
who one might meet.
Do you really think
there's somebody else
on the island?
Gilligan, I think
I know exactly who
this total stranger is.
So do I.
[Honking]
[Lips smack]
Professor:
Mr. Howell!
Both: Mr. Howell!
Mr. Howell.
Why, thurston.
I had no idea
that the thing
would get out
of hand.
I thought you'd
realize it was me.
Darling, how could I?
Well, I mean,
after all,
ginger could have
a secret admirer.
She's a beautiful
movie star.
Oh, and why not me?
Well, lovey,
after all--
after all what?
After all
I'm gonna deliver
these apologies.
You think no other man
could find me attractive?
Lovey, I never
said that.
Exactly what did you say?
After all, being
confined on this island,
I thought it be amusing
for a woman your age.
A woman my age?
Not that you're old,
but you're not
Mary Ann.
Now you think
I'm ancient.
No, I didn't say it.
You said it, lovey.
But that's what
you're thinking.
How could you
be so cruel?
How could you?
Get out, get out!
I never want
to see you again.
Now go! [Sobbing]
Get out!
Well, we'll be
going, Mrs. Howell.
Thank you
very much, girls.
And don't
worry about me.
I'll be alright.
I know exactly
what I'm going to do.
I'm going to put him
out of my mind,
forget him.
That's a good idea.
But on a small
island like this,
it's awfully hard to
forget Mr. Howell.
Who?
Mr. Howell.
Your husband?
You see,
I've forgotten him
already.
Well, we'll be going.
Goodnight.
Goodnight, dears.
Radio: Good evening,
boys and girls.
This is your uncle Artie.
It's story time again,
and tonight I've selected
a marvelous story
to read to you.
It's a story about
a slipper and a prince.
Can you guess
who it is?
That's right!
Cinderella.
Our story opens in
the dingy storeroom
of a once-elegant
mansion.
Cinderella is
forced into the room
by her stepmother.
Poor cinderella.
Poor cinderella...
Now then, cinderella,
I want you to mop
this floor
and make it spotless.
Yes, stepmother.
Do you have to make
so much noise?
Why can't you be quiet
like your beautiful
stepsisters?
But they're asleep.
That's no excuse.
Stepmother,
can't we get a new mop?
It's so hard
to do the floors
with this old one.
You're always asking
for something, cinderella.
Give me this
and give me that.
Now the mop isn't
good enough.
But, stepmother--.
Cinderella, if I pay
for a new mop for you,
how will I pay for your
beautiful stepsisters'
fox hunting lessons?
Get busy
with that floor,
and you know what else
you have to do.
Yes. I have
to make the beds
and do the wash
and chop the wood
and milk the cow
and do the dishes
and iron the clothes
and sweep the chimney,
and then
I can go to work.
[Knock on door]
Well, don't
just stand there
dirty and grimy.
Answer the door.
Yes, stepmother.
[Gasps]
A message
from the palace.
Ooh. A message
from the palace.
A message
from the palace.
Invitations
from the prince
to the ball tonight.
Invitations to the ball.
You may tell
the prince
that my 2 beautiful
daughters will be there.
I'll deliver
the message.
[Crash]
Sorry, I blew my top.
The king is gonna
have to get
taller soldiers
or shorter uniforms.
Didn't I get
an invitation?
You? Ha ha ha ha ha!
Who would invite
anybody as ugly as you?
This is for Giselle,
and this is
for frederica,
my 2 beautiful
daughters.
[Footsteps]
Did somebody
call our names?
Girls, girls,
the prince has invited you
to the palace tonight.
[Both scream]
The prince
to the palace?
Oh, quick,
cinderella!
Mend the hem
on my skirt,
and put my water
in the bath.
Yes, sister.
Girls hurry and
get ready for the ball.
Oh! I hope
the prince is short.
Oh, I hope
he's tall.
It's no matter which,
'cause you're both
going to the ball.
[Both shriek]
Stepmother,
stepmother,
why can't I go?
You, cinderella?
Both: Ha ha ha ha ha!
Good-bye, girls,
and have a wonderful time
at the ball.
Ha ha ha ha!
And you wanted
to go to the ball.
Ha ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
[Sighs] I do wish
I could go.
[Music playing]
[Gasps] Oh,
who are you?
I'm your
fairy godfather.
I didn't know I had
a fairy godfather.
Your fairy
godmother was busy,
for tonight they let
me into the union.
Did I hear you wish
you could go
to the ball?
Oh, yes, but I haven't
got an invitation.
I can arrange
for that.
But I haven't
got a gown.
How could I go
in these old rags?
I can take care
of that, too.
Aah!
Don't worry,
it won't hurt
a bit.
Oops. I goofed.
I think I like me better
the other way.
I'm sorry, cinderella,
but I'm kind of
new at this.
Oh...ooh!
Oh, oh, oh,
fairy godfather,
I'm so happy.
It's an invitation
to the ball.
How can I ever
thank you?
By leaving the ball
before midnight,
at the stroke of
12:00, you shall
be returned
to your old grimy
dirty self.
By the stroke
of midnight?
As a new
fairy godfather,
I can only work
8 hours.
I go off duty
at 12:00.
Oh, well, how am I
going to get there?
I shall fix that.
I shall take
this pumpkin
and change it
into a horse and
a fine carriage
to take you
to the ball.
[Car horn honks]
Goofed again.
[Horse whinnies]
I think I'm getting
the hang of it.
Go and have a ball
at the ball.
I shall,
fairy godfather.
I shall.
Remember, leave
before the stroke
of midnight.
[Fanfare playing]
Ladies and gentlemen,
the prince.
[Fanfare playing]
Nice going in there,
shorty.
My pleasure, prince.
Arise!
Arise and be introduced
to magnificent me.
My prince,
may I introduce
the fair frederica.
And this, my prince,
is the fair Giselle.
Pretty fair,
pretty fair.
Oh,
your highness.
I saw you drop this
in the parade
6 months ago,
and I've
cherished it
because
it belonged to you.
I took it home
and I washed it
and ironed it.
I keep it
with me always.
Uh, from now on
send all my laundry
to her.
Prince, I have
your picture
underneath my pillow.
I had no idea
how handsome
you really are.
Well, no pictures
do justice to me.
No film can capture
my beauty.
Shall we?
[Tango music playing]
Ladies, pardon me.
You can't go!
We just started
to dance!
[Rumba music playing]
Aah!
[Both screaming]
Aah!
My name is cinderella.
That was some kiss.
Yes, and it was
only my hand.
I'm not sure,
but I think
it kissed back.
Would you care
to dance,
cinderella?
Oh, yes, I'd love to.
Play on!
[Waltz playing]
[Rock 'n' roll playing]
[Clock chimes]
Darling.
Oh, the clock
strikes midnight.
Bung! I must go.
You cannot go.
But I must.
I must kiss you
before you leave.
Alright,
you can kiss me
for 6 more bungs.
[Ring]
[Ring]
Ahh--ooh!
I must hurry.
Must you?
Yes, I must.
Oh, my darling.
[Ring]
[Ring]
Cinderella!
Cinderella!
Cinderella!
Cinderella!
Mrs. Howell:
Cinderella.
Cinderella.
Cinderella?
Thurston.
As I was
passing the hut,
I heard you call out
in your sleep
I thought
I heard you say,
"cinderella."
Oh, I might have.
I was dreaming
I was cinderella.
Yes, as long
as you're alright,
I'll--
I know that
you don't want
to see me, my dear.
Darling,
I do, I do.
Oh, I've learned
my lesson.
Oh, my darling,
you'll always
be my prince.
[Cuckoo clock]
[Cuckoo]
[Cuckoo]
Cinderella,
it's almost
midnight.
If you hurry, thurston,
you can kiss me
for 6 more cuckoos.
[Cuckoo]
[Cuckoo]
[Cuckoo]
I like ice cream.
I like hot dogs.
I like spinach.
[Honking]
Mary Ann: Gilligan?
In here, Mary Ann.
Gilligan...
You remember
that pie I made
for you before?
Uh-huh.
It was delicious.
I made 3 of
them,
I can't find
the other 2.
You seen them?
No.
[Honking]
I saw them,
but I didn't take them.
[Honking]
[Explosion]
[Electrical buzzing]
Well, they were
delicious.
* now this is a tale
of our castaways *
* they're here
for a long, long time *
* they'll have to make
the best of things *
* it's an uphill climb *
* the first mate
and his skipper, too *
* will do their very best *
* to make the others
comfortable *
* in the tropic island nest *
* no phone, no lights *
* no motorcars,
not a single luxury *
* like Robinson crusoe *
* it's primitive
as can be *
* so join us here
each week, my friends *
* you're sure to get a smile *
* from 7 stranded castaways *
* here on gilligan's isle *
are you asleep?
Thurston?
Thurston,
are you asleep?!
What?
Yes, yes, I was, dear.
I--having the most
terrible dream.
I dreamt I was
walking barefoot
through $1,000 bills.
You call that
a terrible dream?
Well, they were brand-new,
and they were hurting
my little tootsies.
Aww. I had a dream,
too, dear.
I dreamed that
somebody kissed me
on my cheek.
Oh, and
it seemed so real.
Well, why don't you
go back to sleep
and find out who it was?
What's that?
What's what?
That.
Oh, this that.
Hmm.
It looks like a note.
That's funny.
There's not one
under my pillow.
What does it say?
Oh, oh--nothing,
nothing at all.
Oh, nothing at all, eh?
Let's look at this.
"My darling,
just seeing you,
"just being near you
has given my life
new meaning.
"I don't know
how much longer
I can keep
my feelings to myself."
Lovey...
You have a secret admirer.
* just sit right back,
and you'll hear a tale *
* a tale of a fateful trip *
* that started
from this tropic port *
* aboard this tiny ship *
* the mate was
a mighty sailin' man *
* the skipper
brave and sure *
* 5 passengers set sail
that day for a 3-hour tour *
* a 3-hour tour *
[thunder]
* the weather started
getting rough *
* the tiny ship was tossed *
* if not for the courage
of the fearless crew *
* the minnow would be lost,
the minnow would be lost *
* the ship set ground
on the shore of this *
* uncharted desert isle *
* with gilligan *
* the skipper, too *
* the millionaire and his wife *
* the movie star *
* the professor and Mary Ann *
* here on gilligan's isle *
What was that for?
As if you
didn't know,
you sailor.
Well, sure
I'm a sailor.
Sweetheart
in every port.
What?
This is one port
you can forget about,
you overstuffed
sea wolf.
Just a minute,
Mr. Howell.
Tell me what this
is all about--
hello, captain.
Mrs. Howell.
Why don't you call
her "sweetheart?"
Sweetheart?
Girl in every port?
Say, what's
going on in here?
I suppose you
didn't write this.
Oh, captain,
I had no idea
how you felt,
but you really
must forget
about me.
After all, I am
a married woman.
"I don't know
how much longer
I can keep my feelings
to myself."
You don't think
I wrote that?
Deny it.
I dare you, deny it.
I deny it.
I, uh, assume
there is a reason
for this
irrational behavior.
Don't play innocent
with me, you cad!
Cad?
The quiet ones,
they're always
the one.
Tell me what this is about,
then we both know.
Mrs. Howell,
perhaps you can--
oh, Mrs. Howell--
really, professor.
You needn't
be so formal.
Formal?
The nerve!
Right in front
of my very eyes.
Aha! This is
some sort of joke.
Some sort of a joke?
Writing love notes
to my wife?
Oh, really, professor.
I never
would have guessed
that underneath
that calm exterior,
there lived
a seething volcano.
Well, he may be
a volcano, but
I'm going to erupt.
How dare you
write love notes
to my wife?
Oh, I already
did that.
Mr. Howell,
Mrs. Howell,
I realize that
you're both upset,
and obviously with
some justification.
However, I did not
write any notes.
Didn't you really?
I can assure you
that I am not
a seething volcano,
at least as far
as a married
woman's concerned.
Well, if you didn't
write the note,
and if the captain
didn't write
the note--
it must be...
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Are these your gloves,
Mr. Howell?
Don't try
and bluff me.
You're not the shy,
innocent little boy
that you
pretend to be.
Who'd do that?
None of
your excuses!
In a way, gilligan,
I'm very flattered.
Oh, you're so young.
I'll thrash you within
an inch of your life.
Oh, don't be too hard
on him, dear.
After all,
he's just a young boy--
a silly, wonderful boy.
There, there,
sweet prince.
Your lady fair
understands.
Sweet prince,
lady fair?
I'm just mad
about your last note,
you bad,
impetuous thing.
What note?
Let me see that.
"Dream girl, now that
you know my feelings,
do I dare hope
that you might
care for me, too?"
You'll need the red crosss
to care for you--
I didn't write
that note
or any notes.
You deny it, too!
Obviously
the three of you,
you gentlemen,
you deny it
because you're afraid
of incurring
the mighty
howell wrath!
But I won't rest
until I find out
who the culprit is!
Ooh, I've never seen
Mr. Howell so angry.
Isn't it wonderful?
And I found this note
pinned to my wardrobe.
That makes 5 notes in all.
Oh, whoever he is,
he certainly has
a crush on you.
You ever had a
secret admirer,
Mary Ann?
If I did, he sure
kept it a secret.
You ever had a secret
admirer, ginger?
I once had an
admirer who
had a secret--
a wife and 8 kids.
You don't know
who's writing
the notes,
so where are
the pink papers
coming from?
They all denied it.
Having a secret admirer
is rather fun,
but it'd be more fun
to know who he is.
Maybe I can
help you find out.
But how could
you find out if
Mr. Howell couldn't?
Confidentially, I
look a little better
in a sarong
than Mr. Howell.
[Whispering]
Okay, let's go.
Mary Ann,
I'm telling you
for the last time!
The skipper's mine!
Mary Ann: That's what
you think.
I thought he was
cute too.
I've just been shy
to say how I feel.
Well, you're late.
When I go
after a man,
I go after him.
It doesn't mean
you're gonna get him.
Are you kidding?
Listen, you farm girl
if you know
what's good for you,
you'll stay away
from my man!
Your man? Ha!
You think every man
looks at you
because you
wiggle your hips
like a pair
of windshield wipers?
Oh! One more crack
like that,
and I'll add
some black and blue
to your brown eyes.
That'll be the most
work you've done
since you've been
on the island.
[Whispers]
He's coming.
That did it!
That did it. Oh!
Hi, girls.
What's going on
out here?
Skipper, you do like me
better than ginger,
don't you?
Well, I like you both,
Mary Ann.
Well! If that's
your attitude,
you can have her.
Ginger, I had no idea
that you were so crazy
about me.
Oh, skipper,
I'd fight anyone
for you,
even Mrs. Howell.
Even Mrs. Howell?
You're the one who
wrote the notes?
Not me, but if
I'd write anyone a note,
it'd be you.
Skipper,
why don't you
write me a note?
Now, this lie detector
should prove conclusively
that I had nothing
to do with the notes.
Uh, yes. Exactly
how does it work?
I've wired the ship's
horn from the minnow,
and utilized the
batteries from
the radio.
If anyone lies,
the horn goes off.
Let's get on
with the questions.
I'm dying to know
who's secretly
in love with me.
Yes, tell a lie
so we can judge
the truth.
Uh, yes, of course.
Um, I should like to stay
on this island forever.
Never be rescued.
[Honking]
You see?
Ask him about me.
[Whispering]
No, in due time.
I must be crafty.
The idea is to catch
someone off-guard.
Uh, professor, uh,
what exactly
are your degrees?
I have a b.A.
From u.S.C.,
an m.A.
From s.M.U.,
and a Ph.D. from t.C.U.
Well, I don't know
anything about
your education,
but it sounds like
a marvelous recipe
for alphabet soup.
Alright, fire away.
You like brunettes?
You wanna whisper sweet
nothings into my ear?
You like redheads?
You planning to write me
some more love notes?
You like blondes?
Do you need
more pink stationery?
Yes, no, yes, no,
yes, and no.
There, you see,
I always tell the truth.
[Honking]
Alright.
Uh, gilligan,
were you
ever in love?
Yes.
What
was her name?
Herman.
Herman?
That's an odd name
for a girl.
Not if the girl's
a turtle.
Oh, gilligan,
be serious.
She was in love
with me.
[Honking]
I lied. She was
in love with
another turtle.
Alright, gilligan,
let's talk about
Mrs. Howell.
It wouldn't work.
Don't you see?
Gilligan's answered
your questions truthfully
about who he loved,
and it wasn't
Mrs. Howell.
But I've been
getting all those notes.
Somebody must be
in love with me.
Well, if none of us
wrote those notes,
it means there's someone
else on the island.
Someone else?
You mean a total
stranger
in love
with my wife?
We've simply
got to find out
who finds me
so fascinating.
I must know who
this mysterious,
frightening,
fiendish,
sweet stranger is.
Where are you
going, dear?
Oh, to fix my hair
and freshen my makeup.
After all,
one never knows
who one might meet.
Do you really think
there's somebody else
on the island?
Gilligan, I think
I know exactly who
this total stranger is.
So do I.
[Honking]
[Lips smack]
Professor:
Mr. Howell!
Both: Mr. Howell!
Mr. Howell.
Why, thurston.
I had no idea
that the thing
would get out
of hand.
I thought you'd
realize it was me.
Darling, how could I?
Well, I mean,
after all,
ginger could have
a secret admirer.
She's a beautiful
movie star.
Oh, and why not me?
Well, lovey,
after all--
after all what?
After all
I'm gonna deliver
these apologies.
You think no other man
could find me attractive?
Lovey, I never
said that.
Exactly what did you say?
After all, being
confined on this island,
I thought it be amusing
for a woman your age.
A woman my age?
Not that you're old,
but you're not
Mary Ann.
Now you think
I'm ancient.
No, I didn't say it.
You said it, lovey.
But that's what
you're thinking.
How could you
be so cruel?
How could you?
Get out, get out!
I never want
to see you again.
Now go! [Sobbing]
Get out!
Well, we'll be
going, Mrs. Howell.
Thank you
very much, girls.
And don't
worry about me.
I'll be alright.
I know exactly
what I'm going to do.
I'm going to put him
out of my mind,
forget him.
That's a good idea.
But on a small
island like this,
it's awfully hard to
forget Mr. Howell.
Who?
Mr. Howell.
Your husband?
You see,
I've forgotten him
already.
Well, we'll be going.
Goodnight.
Goodnight, dears.
Radio: Good evening,
boys and girls.
This is your uncle Artie.
It's story time again,
and tonight I've selected
a marvelous story
to read to you.
It's a story about
a slipper and a prince.
Can you guess
who it is?
That's right!
Cinderella.
Our story opens in
the dingy storeroom
of a once-elegant
mansion.
Cinderella is
forced into the room
by her stepmother.
Poor cinderella.
Poor cinderella...
Now then, cinderella,
I want you to mop
this floor
and make it spotless.
Yes, stepmother.
Do you have to make
so much noise?
Why can't you be quiet
like your beautiful
stepsisters?
But they're asleep.
That's no excuse.
Stepmother,
can't we get a new mop?
It's so hard
to do the floors
with this old one.
You're always asking
for something, cinderella.
Give me this
and give me that.
Now the mop isn't
good enough.
But, stepmother--.
Cinderella, if I pay
for a new mop for you,
how will I pay for your
beautiful stepsisters'
fox hunting lessons?
Get busy
with that floor,
and you know what else
you have to do.
Yes. I have
to make the beds
and do the wash
and chop the wood
and milk the cow
and do the dishes
and iron the clothes
and sweep the chimney,
and then
I can go to work.
[Knock on door]
Well, don't
just stand there
dirty and grimy.
Answer the door.
Yes, stepmother.
[Gasps]
A message
from the palace.
Ooh. A message
from the palace.
A message
from the palace.
Invitations
from the prince
to the ball tonight.
Invitations to the ball.
You may tell
the prince
that my 2 beautiful
daughters will be there.
I'll deliver
the message.
[Crash]
Sorry, I blew my top.
The king is gonna
have to get
taller soldiers
or shorter uniforms.
Didn't I get
an invitation?
You? Ha ha ha ha ha!
Who would invite
anybody as ugly as you?
This is for Giselle,
and this is
for frederica,
my 2 beautiful
daughters.
[Footsteps]
Did somebody
call our names?
Girls, girls,
the prince has invited you
to the palace tonight.
[Both scream]
The prince
to the palace?
Oh, quick,
cinderella!
Mend the hem
on my skirt,
and put my water
in the bath.
Yes, sister.
Girls hurry and
get ready for the ball.
Oh! I hope
the prince is short.
Oh, I hope
he's tall.
It's no matter which,
'cause you're both
going to the ball.
[Both shriek]
Stepmother,
stepmother,
why can't I go?
You, cinderella?
Both: Ha ha ha ha ha!
Good-bye, girls,
and have a wonderful time
at the ball.
Ha ha ha ha!
And you wanted
to go to the ball.
Ha ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
[Sighs] I do wish
I could go.
[Music playing]
[Gasps] Oh,
who are you?
I'm your
fairy godfather.
I didn't know I had
a fairy godfather.
Your fairy
godmother was busy,
for tonight they let
me into the union.
Did I hear you wish
you could go
to the ball?
Oh, yes, but I haven't
got an invitation.
I can arrange
for that.
But I haven't
got a gown.
How could I go
in these old rags?
I can take care
of that, too.
Aah!
Don't worry,
it won't hurt
a bit.
Oops. I goofed.
I think I like me better
the other way.
I'm sorry, cinderella,
but I'm kind of
new at this.
Oh...ooh!
Oh, oh, oh,
fairy godfather,
I'm so happy.
It's an invitation
to the ball.
How can I ever
thank you?
By leaving the ball
before midnight,
at the stroke of
12:00, you shall
be returned
to your old grimy
dirty self.
By the stroke
of midnight?
As a new
fairy godfather,
I can only work
8 hours.
I go off duty
at 12:00.
Oh, well, how am I
going to get there?
I shall fix that.
I shall take
this pumpkin
and change it
into a horse and
a fine carriage
to take you
to the ball.
[Car horn honks]
Goofed again.
[Horse whinnies]
I think I'm getting
the hang of it.
Go and have a ball
at the ball.
I shall,
fairy godfather.
I shall.
Remember, leave
before the stroke
of midnight.
[Fanfare playing]
Ladies and gentlemen,
the prince.
[Fanfare playing]
Nice going in there,
shorty.
My pleasure, prince.
Arise!
Arise and be introduced
to magnificent me.
My prince,
may I introduce
the fair frederica.
And this, my prince,
is the fair Giselle.
Pretty fair,
pretty fair.
Oh,
your highness.
I saw you drop this
in the parade
6 months ago,
and I've
cherished it
because
it belonged to you.
I took it home
and I washed it
and ironed it.
I keep it
with me always.
Uh, from now on
send all my laundry
to her.
Prince, I have
your picture
underneath my pillow.
I had no idea
how handsome
you really are.
Well, no pictures
do justice to me.
No film can capture
my beauty.
Shall we?
[Tango music playing]
Ladies, pardon me.
You can't go!
We just started
to dance!
[Rumba music playing]
Aah!
[Both screaming]
Aah!
My name is cinderella.
That was some kiss.
Yes, and it was
only my hand.
I'm not sure,
but I think
it kissed back.
Would you care
to dance,
cinderella?
Oh, yes, I'd love to.
Play on!
[Waltz playing]
[Rock 'n' roll playing]
[Clock chimes]
Darling.
Oh, the clock
strikes midnight.
Bung! I must go.
You cannot go.
But I must.
I must kiss you
before you leave.
Alright,
you can kiss me
for 6 more bungs.
[Ring]
[Ring]
Ahh--ooh!
I must hurry.
Must you?
Yes, I must.
Oh, my darling.
[Ring]
[Ring]
Cinderella!
Cinderella!
Cinderella!
Cinderella!
Mrs. Howell:
Cinderella.
Cinderella.
Cinderella?
Thurston.
As I was
passing the hut,
I heard you call out
in your sleep
I thought
I heard you say,
"cinderella."
Oh, I might have.
I was dreaming
I was cinderella.
Yes, as long
as you're alright,
I'll--
I know that
you don't want
to see me, my dear.
Darling,
I do, I do.
Oh, I've learned
my lesson.
Oh, my darling,
you'll always
be my prince.
[Cuckoo clock]
[Cuckoo]
[Cuckoo]
Cinderella,
it's almost
midnight.
If you hurry, thurston,
you can kiss me
for 6 more cuckoos.
[Cuckoo]
[Cuckoo]
[Cuckoo]
I like ice cream.
I like hot dogs.
I like spinach.
[Honking]
Mary Ann: Gilligan?
In here, Mary Ann.
Gilligan...
You remember
that pie I made
for you before?
Uh-huh.
It was delicious.
I made 3 of
them,
I can't find
the other 2.
You seen them?
No.
[Honking]
I saw them,
but I didn't take them.
[Honking]
[Explosion]
[Electrical buzzing]
Well, they were
delicious.
* now this is a tale
of our castaways *
* they're here
for a long, long time *
* they'll have to make
the best of things *
* it's an uphill climb *
* the first mate
and his skipper, too *
* will do their very best *
* to make the others
comfortable *
* in the tropic island nest *
* no phone, no lights *
* no motorcars,
not a single luxury *
* like Robinson crusoe *
* it's primitive
as can be *
* so join us here
each week, my friends *
* you're sure to get a smile *
* from 7 stranded castaways *
* here on gilligan's isle *