Frasier (1993–2004): Season 8, Episode 16 - Docu.Drama - full transcript

AND SADLY, NO ONE
WAS ABLE TO ANSWER

TODAY'S PSYCHOLOGICAL
MIND TEASER.

SO, ONCE AGAIN, THE
PRIZE GOES UNCLAIMED.

BY THE WAY, TODAY'S
ANSWER WAS ANHEDONIA.

[laughing] ANHEDONIA.

THIS IS DR. FRASIER CRANE

SAYING, GOOD DAY, SEATTLE,
AND GOOD MENTAL HEALTH.

[whistles]

THAT WAS A REAL
BRAIN BENDER, DOC.

YOU KNOW, THE IDEA IS TO LET
PEOPLE WIN ONCE IN A WHILE.

OH, PLEASE, KENNY,
I WILL NOT PANDER.



WHEN SOME LUCKY
INDIVIDUAL LOOKS AT HIS PRIZE,

I WANT HIM TO BE ABLE TO SAY,

"I EARNED THIS."

IT'S AN ANTENNA BALL.

OH, WELL.

OH, ROZ.

WHAT? I GOT SOME GOOD NEWS.

YOUR DOCUMENTARY IS A GO.

OH, THAT'S GREAT!

THANK YOU, KENNY!
CONGRATULATIONS.

ROZ, YOU'RE DOING A DOCUMENTARY?

YEAH, WELL, I'VE BEEN WANTING
TO DO SOMETHING ON MY OWN,

SO I THOUGHT I'D DO
A SPECIAL ON SPACE

WHAT WITH IT BEING 2001 AND ALL.



WE'RE GONNA DO THE
CASSINI MISSION TO SATURN

AND TELE-ROBOTICS,
THAT KIND OF STUFF.

YOU GOT A SHOW, YOU GOT A SHOW.

I DON'T KNOW WHO TO
KISS UP TO ANYMORE!

YOU DON'T HAVE TO
KISS UP TO ANYONE.

[laughing]

I WISH I DIDN'T. AH.

SO, ROZ, YOU'RE A SPACE NERD.

WELL, I WOULDN'T GO THAT FAR.

THERE IS JUST SOMETHING
ABOUT ROCKETS, THOUGH.

AH, INDEED.

ROZ?

IT SOUNDS LIKE YOUR
SHOW COULD BE A PORTAL

THROUGH WHICH WE CAN GLIMPSE

THE PROMISE OF THE FUTURE,

A PROMISE LIT BY
A BILLION STARS.

GODSPEED, ROZ DOYLE.

YOU WOULDN'T BY ANY CHANCE BE
HOPING TO NARRATE THIS, WOULD YOU?

ME?

WELL, ACTUALLY, I
WAS GONNA ASK YOU,

BUT I WAS AFRAID IT MIGHT
BE KIND OF AWKWARD,

YOU WORKING FOR ME.

I MEAN, YOU'VE BEEN
MY BOSS FOR 8 YEARS.

I JUST... I WASN'T SURE
IF YOU CAN HANDLE IT.

OH, ROZ, POO!

I WELCOME A LITTLE
ROLE REVERSAL.

I THINK IT WILL DO OUR
RELATIONSHIP A LOT OF GOOD.

WELL, AS LONG AS YOU PROMISE IT
WON'T BE A PROBLEM. NO, OF COURSE NOT.

GOSH, YOU KNOW,
ACTUALLY, I'M KIND OF EXCITED.

YOU MAY NOT KNOW
THIS BUT AS A TYKE,

I HAD MY HEART SET
ON SPACE FLIGHT.

[sighing] TRAGIC, ISN'T IT?

HOW A CHILD'S DREAMS
CAN BE SQUASHED

BY A SINGLE RIDE ON A
DIABOLICALLY SPEEDY TILT-A-WHIRL?

[sighing]

[doorbell ringing]

OH, JEEZ.

HEY. HEY, NILES,

JUST IN TIME FOR CHILI.

IT'S MY BEST BATCH ALL WEEK.

DO YOU EVER MISS VEGETABLES?

FOR YOUR INFORMATION,
COLLEGE, THE BEAN IS A VEGETABLE.

SO, WHAT'S NEW WITH DAPH?

HOW ARE THINGS AT THE FAT FARM?

IT'S A SPA.

OH, SORRY. HOW ARE
THINGS AT THE FAT SPA?

FINE, FINE. SHE'S
DOING VERY WELL.

SHE'S... SHE'S LOSING WEIGHT
AND, UH, GAINING FRIENDS.

UM, DAD,

I HAD AN IDEA ABOUT SOMETHING
YOU AND I COULD DO TOGETHER.

NO, MMM-MMM, UH...

DID YOU HAPPEN TO READ THE
ARTS AND LEISURE SECTION TODAY?

THE JUMBLE?

DID IT. "A GOOD MAN
IS HARD TO FIND."

NO. ACTUALLY I WAS THINKING
OF SOMETHING A LITTLE LOFTIER.

MMM.

DAD, DO YOU REMEMBER
WHEN FRASIER WAS IN COLLEGE,

A LITTLE TRADITION YOU
AND I HAD EVERY SPRING?

OH, THE KITE FESTIVAL? MMM-HMM.

I THOUGHT THEY DIDN'T
DO THAT ANYMORE.

THEY'RE BRINGING
IT BACK THIS YEAR.

I WANT US TO ENTER,
JUST LIKE OLD TIMES.

OH, WE MADE SOME
GOOD KITES, DIDN'T WE?

OH! GREAT KITES. THE BLUE BARON.

THE SCREAMING MIMI. MMM-HMM.

THE SHIELD OF PERSEUS.

YOU CAME UP WITH
THAT ONE, DIDN'T YOU?

THANK YOU.

SO, WHAT DO YOU SAY? YOU
WANNA DO IT? OH, I'D LOVE TO, NILES,

BUT I CAN'T FLY KITES
ANYMORE, NOT WITH MY HIP.

LET ME BE YOUR HIP.

WE'LL BUILD IT TOGETHER,
AND THEN I'LL FLY IT.

I'M OLD ENOUGH NOW.

WELL, WHAT THE HELL.

[chuckles] YOU KNOW, I'M GONNA
GO MAKE SOME SKETCHES.

YOU KNOW, I ALWAYS
WANTED TO TRY A DRAGON.

[gasps] THAT'S A GREAT IDEA.

WE'LL NAME IT FAFNIR

AFTER SIEGFRIED'S FIERY NEMESIS.

MAYBE WE'LL JUST MAKE A FISH.

(Roz) AND BEFORE WE GET
STARTED ON THE SCRIPT

I HAVE A COUPLE OF
PRODUCTION NOTES.

ED, CAN YOU GET ME 40 MORE
SECONDS OF THE MIR TRANSMISSIONS?

NO PROBLEM.

HELLO, EVERYONE. I'M
TERRIBLY SORRY I'M LATE.

PLEASE, CONTINUE.

LEAD ON, MAESTRO.

OK, KENNY'S ONLY GIVING ME A
COUPLE OF HOURS TO RECORD,

SO WE'LL DO THE BIG CHUNKS
FIRST, AND THE THROW-TOS LAST.

AND IF WE HAVE ANY TIME AT THE END
OF THE SESSION, WE'LL TAPE THE PROMOS.

FRASIER, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

I'M SORRY, ROZ. I... I
WAS JUST LOOKING

FOR A LITTLE
CAFFEINE KICK START.

CAN IT WAIT TILL WE HAVE A
BREAK? YES, OF COURSE IT CAN.

YOU'RE THE MAESTRO.

CAN YOU PLEASE
STOP CALLING ME THAT?

DOES EVERYBODY HAVE THE SCRIPTS?

RIGHT, UH, GOT IT, GOT IT, YEP.

OK, NOW, I THINK, BASICALLY
WE'RE IN GOOD SHAPE,

BUT I FELT LIKE IT DRAGGED
A LITTLE IN THE MIDDLE.

ANY THOUGHTS? I AGREE.

UH, MAYBE WE SHOULD TALK
ABOUT THE SOCIAL ASPECTS,

THE PANIC THAT SPREAD
THROUGH THE SCHOOLS

BECAUSE WE WEREN'T
EMPHASIZING SPACE.

OH, I LIKE THAT. GOOD IDEA.

WHAT ABOUT THE SPACE PROGRAM

AS A TOOL FOR THE POLITICIANS?

GOOD ANGLE.

THESE ARE GREAT IDEAS,
GUYS. KEEP THEM COMING.

YOU KNOW, I... I THOUGHT
WE MIGHT INTERCUT

BETWEEN THE RUSSIAN
AND AMERICAN PROGRAMS

AND BUILD UP THE TENSION
OF THE SPACE RACE.

I DON'T THINK SO.

WHAT ABOUT THAT DOG
THE RUSSIANS SENT UP?

I LOVE THAT! PEOPLE LIKE DOGS.

HOW ABOUT THOSE CHIMPS?

WELL, I DON'T KNOW.

I MEAN, THIS ISN'T ZOO IN SPACE.

SO, UH, IT LOOKS LIKE WE'RE
FILLED OUT IN THE MIDDLE HERE,

SO I THINK WE'RE DOIN' OK.

WHAT, FRASIER?

WELL, IT... IT'S JUST
A... A TEENY THING, ROZ.

I WAS THINKING THAT,
SEEING AS HOW IT IS

THE JUMPING-OFF
PLACE FOR THE FUTURE,

THAT WE MIGHT DEVOTE 2 SEGMENTS

TO THE INTERNATIONAL
SPACE STATION.

THANKS. BUT I'VE WORKED THIS
OUT VERY SPECIFICALLY. OH, RIGHT.

YOU KNOW, I WAS THINKING,
WE CAN COMBINE THE STUFF

ABOUT THE MANNED AND UNMANNED
MISSIONS INTO ONE SEGMENT

AND SPREAD OUT
THE SPACE STATION.

OH, I LIKE THAT. GOOD IDEA, B.K.

I JUST SAID THAT.

OH, I DIDN'T HEAR YOU.

WELL, YOU MUST HAVE HEARD
ME, ROZ, BECAUSE YOU SAID, "NO."

FRASIER, LET'S
MOVE ON, SHALL WE?

OK, LET'S TALK MUSIC.

WELL, WHAT IF WE
LED OFF THE PROGRAM

WITH THAT MUSIC FROM
2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY?

[laughing] HOME RUN, B.K.!

OH, UM...

UM...

WHAT IS IT, FRASIER? UH, WELL,

NOT TO BELITTLE YOUR
SUGGESTION, B.K., WHICH I LOVE,

IT'S JUST THAT, THAT
PARTICULAR PIECE OF MUSIC

UH, HAS BEEN A BIT, UH,

[stammering] I DON'T
KNOW, A BIT OVERUSED.

AND IT... IT OCCURS
TO ME THAT PERHAPS

AN EQUALLY EVOCATIVE,
LESS FAMILIAR PIECE OF MUSIC

MIGHT BETTER SERVE.

THANK YOU.

YOU MEAN SOMETHING
LIKE THE PLANETS BY HOLST?

EXACTLY. IT'S A LITTLE
LESS ON THE NOSE.

WHAT ABOUT PHILIP GLASS?

YOU KNOW, GO
COMPLETELY MINIMALIST.

IT'S LIKE SPACE!
NOW WE'RE COOKING!

PEOPLE... HAVE YOU
EVER LISTENED TO SUN RA?

OH, YES, YES, YES. OR PERIOD
MUSIC, LIKE, UH, HITS FROM THE '60s.

THIS IS GOOD. THIS IS GOOD.

AND WHEN WE'RE COVERING
THE AMERICAN PROGRAM,

WE CAN USE AMERICAN
MUSIC, LIKE COPELAND.

BETTER YET, CHARLES IVES.

AND THEN FOR THE
RUSSIANS, WE CAN USE...

SHOSTAKOVICH! LET'S DO IT!

FRASIER!

CAN I TALK TO YOU FOR A SECOND?

OH, YES, UH, UH, OF COURSE,
ROZ, YOU'RE THE BOSS.

UH, BE BACK IN 5,
EVERYBODY. YEAH.

UH, LISTEN, ROZ, LET ME GIVE YOU
JUST ONE LITTLE PIECE OF ADVICE.

I FIND THAT WHEN I'M IN
A LEADERSHIP POSITION,

THE BEST WAY TO
RALLY MY STAFF...

WHAT STAFF?

I'M YOUR STAFF AND I'VE BEEN
LISTENING TO YOU FOR 8 YEARS

AND I WOULD LIKE FOR YOU
TO LISTEN TO ME FOR A CHANGE!

AND I SUPPORT
THAT... THEN SHUT UP!

WELL.

I'M NOT SURE THAT'S A VERY WISE
TONE TO TAKE IF YOU DON'T WANT TO

LOSE YOUR NARRATOR.

IS THAT A THREAT?

WELL, I'M JUST SAYING THAT
ALIENATING ME ISN'T PROBABLY

IN THE BEST INTEREST
OF THE SHOW.

WELL, MAYBE THE SHOW WOULD
BE BETTER OFF WITHOUT YOU.

WELL, THEN, MAYBE I
SHOULD JUST LEAVE THE SHOW.

WELL, MAYBE THAT'S WHAT
THE SHOW WANTS YOU TO DO.

WELL, THEN. THE
SHOW CAN BITE ME!

I REALIZE I'VE GONE
ON HERE A BIT, FRED.

SO LET ME TRY TO BOIL
THIS DOWN FOR YOU.

IF YOU WANT TO BE A GOOD LEADER,

YOU'VE GOT TO BE ABLE TO
ADMIT WHEN YOU'RE WRONG.

NO ONE EVER STOOD
SO TALL AS WHEN HE

OR SHE

STOOPED TO SAY,

"I'M SORRY."

(Fred on phone) WHAT'S THAT GOT
TO DO WITH MY FEAR OF INTIMACY?

WHICH BRINGS TO
MIND ANOTHER PHRASE.

"THERE IS NONE SO BLIND

"AS HE

"OR SHE

WHO WILL NOT SEE."

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK
AFTER THE NEWS.

SUBTLE, FRASIER.

BUT JUST SO YOU KNOW, I
DO NOT OWE YOU AN APOLOGY.

YOU WERE TRYING TO TAKE OVER
MY SHOW, AND THAT'S WHY I FIRED YOU.

YOU DID NOT FIRE ME, I QUIT.

BUT AT THIS LATE DATE, ROZ,

YOU SHOULD BE SPARED THE
BURDEN OF HAVING TO REPLACE ME.

SO WHY DON'T WE AGREE
TO PUT ASIDE OUR EGOS

AND CONTINUE WITH THE PROGRAM.

I'VE ALREADY REPLACED YOU.

OH, ROZ, YOU'VE GONE
WITH AN ALSO-RAN.

WHO IS IT?

JOHN GLENN.

THE ASTRONAUT?

YES.

THE SENATOR?

YES. THE JOHN GLENN,
AMERICAN HERO.

SO I TAKE IT THERE
WAS NO ONE AVAILABLE

WITH ANY PREVIOUS
RADIO EXPERIENCE.

(Martin) LOOSEN UP, SON.

THAT'S THE WAY.

RELAXED BUT FIRM.

IT'S NOT A FIGHT,
IT'S A PERSUASION.

UH, OK, DAD. I AM READY. I
WANNA TAKE HER TO THE PARK.

OH, OUT OF THE QUESTION!

WELL, I HAVE TO PRACTICE
IN REAL-LIFE CONDITIONS.

I CAN'T KEEP RUNNING
UP AND DOWN THE HALLS.

NO, IT'S TOO WINDY.

ALL RIGHT, WELL, UH,

CAN I AT LEAST HANG HER OFF THE
BALCONY SO WE CAN SEE HOW SHE LOOKS?

NILES, WHAT KIND OF
DOPE ARE YOU SMOKIN'?

THE... THE UPDRAFT WOULD
PULL YOU OFF YOUR FEET.

YOU KNOW, YOU'VE
GOT A LOT TO LEARN.

THIS ISN'T LIKE DRIVING
A CAR, YOU KNOW?

IT TAKES PRACTICE
AND CONCENTRATION.

HEY, FRASE.

DID YOU GET THINGS ALL
PATCHED UP WITH ROZ?

ON THE CONTRARY.

EVERY TIME I OFFER
HER AN OLIVE BRANCH,

SHE SNAPS IT IN 2,

SETS IT ON FIRE, AND
WRITES "NO" WITH THE ASHES.

SHE HAD THE TEMERITY
TO CALL ME OVERBEARING.

THIS TIME THE WOUND IS
DEEP, MY FRIENDS, BONE-DEEP.

WELL... (Frasier) OH,
YES, OF COURSE.

SOMETIMES, I AM
FORCEFUL WITH MY OPINIONS,

BUT THAT IS ONLY
BECAUSE I'M PASSIONATE

AND RIGHT AND PASSIONATE
ABOUT BEING RIGHT!

OVERBEARING, AS IF!

WELL, SHE PROBABLY WANTS TO...

IT'S INSUPPORTABLE, DAD!

SHE WENT OUT AND GOT
JOHN GLENN TO REPLACE ME.

THE ASTRONAUT? YES,
YES, THE AMERICAN HERO.

JOHN GLENN? HE'S PERFECT.

OH, MOON DUST
AND STAR SHINE, DAD!

YES, HE'S BEEN TO SPACE.

BUT DOES HE HAVE THE VOICE,

THE SAVVY, THE
RADIO CHARISMA, HMM?

BATTEN DOWN THE KITE, NILES.

IT'S REALLY STARTIN'
TO BLOW HARD IN HERE.

FRASIER, YOUR ISSUES
NOTWITHSTANDING,

GETTING JOHN GLENN
IS QUITE A COUP FOR ROZ.

JOHN GLENN IS JUST A
SPACE AGE BAND-AID, NILES,

AND ROZ IS USING IT TO COVER UP

THIS ENORMOUS AUTHORITY
ISSUE SHE HAS WITH ME

WHICH SHE PERSISTS IN DENYING!

UM. YOU'RE RIGHT, NILES!
IT'S TIME FOR ACTION!

I'VE GOT TO SHOW HER ONCE AND
FOR ALL THAT I AM NOT SOME MEDDLER

AND THAT SHE IS
ONLY BEING PARANOID.

I'LL BE IN MY ROOM PLOTTING
SOME WAY TO PROVE IT.

[growling]

HEY, FAFNIR, HEY.

[wind blowing]

[barking]

ALL I KNOW IS THAT A COUPLE OF YOUR
CLOWNS WIRED UP THE DISH A MONTH AGO,

AND NOW I CAN'T
EVEN SEE THE NEWS.

NOW, I DO A LOT OF T.V. WATCHING

AND I DON'T WANNA HAVE TO TAKE
MY BUSINESS ELSEWHERE BUT I WILL.

[growling]

[mimicking static]

CAN'T HEAR YOU, SORRY.

[knocking at door]

SENATOR? YES.

UM, I'D LIKE TO INTRODUCE
MYSELF. I'M DR. FRASIER CRANE.

OH, GLAD TO MEET YOU. IT'S
A PLEASURE TO MEET YOU.

YES. I WAS THE PREVIOUS
NARRATOR ON THE DOCUMENTARY.

THAT'S A FASCINATING STORY.

WELL, YOU'VE HEARD
HER SIDE OF THE STORY.

MAYBE SOMEDAY YOU'LL HEAR MINE.

WELL, I WAS TALKING
ABOUT SPACE TRAVEL.

[chuckling] AH. YEAH.

IT WAS GOOD OF YOU
TO STEP ASIDE, THOUGH.

UH, YOU HAVE A
SCHEDULING CONFLICT?

YES, UNFORTUNATELY.
THE OPERA GUILDS' ANNUAL

FOOTBALL TOURNAMENT.

WELL, I'M THE QUARTERBACK.
ANYWAY, UH, HERE.

IF YOU WOULDN'T MIND
INDULGING ME, SURE.

I HAVE A FEW SUGGESTIONS THAT I
DIDN'T HAVE A CHANCE TO RUN BY ROZ.

ALL RIGHT. OK, GOOD.
UH, HERE WE ARE.

NOW, THIS FIRST ONE
IS ABOUT A SEATTLE MAN

WHO TOOK HIS 2 SONS TO THE ROOF

TO SEE IF THEY COULD
SPOT FRIENDSHIP 7 FLYING BY.

WAS THAT YOU?

THAT'S VERY PERCEPTIVE
OF YOU, SIR, YES.

THAT WAS ME, MY FATHER,
AND MY BROTHER. YEAH.

I THOUGHT A STORY FROM
THE GLORY DAYS OF SPACE

MIGHT HELP TO LAUNCH THE SHOW.

YOU KNOW, THAT SOUNDS GREAT. I'LL
BRING THAT UP TO ROZ. OH, ABOUT THAT.

IT'S PROBABLY BEST THAT ROZ NEVER
KNOW WE HAD THIS CONVERSATION.

WHY NOT?

WELL, YOU SEE ANY SUGGESTION
THAT CAME FROM ME RIGHT NOW,

ROZ WOULD BE INCLINED
TO SHOOT DOWN,

AND, UH, SHE'S STILL A LITTLE
TICKED OFF AT ME FOR DROPPING OUT.

WELL, YOU KNOW, I DON'T LIKE
TO GO BEHIND SOMEONE'S BACK.

OOH! WE'RE NOT GOING
BEHIND ANYBODY'S BACK.

EVEN IF WE WERE, IT'S
ONLY TEMPORARY. SO...

AT... AT ANY RATE, UH,

IT IS FOR THE GOOD OF THE SHOW.

WELL, OK, I'LL LOOK
THROUGH THESE THINGS

AND I'LL PROBABLY BRING 'EM
UP TO ROZ. OH, THAT'S TERRIFIC.

GOOD. THANK YOU, SIR.

IT WAS A PLEASURE. TO
MEET YOU. GOOD. THANK YOU.

TAKE CARE. SEE YOU.

OH, SENATOR, UH,

WHAT ARE YOU
DRINKING THERE? TANG?

2 MINUTES AND 20 SECONDS.

A NEW RECORD.

SO, LET ME GET THIS CUED UP,
AND WE'LL BE READY TO GO, OK?

SOUNDS GREAT. ALL RIGHT.

FRASIER, WHAT ARE
YOU DOING HERE?

ROZ, I'M JUST OBSERVING.

IF YOU WANT ME
TO GO, I... I WILL,

BUT, YOU... YOU HAVE TO ADMIT THIS
IS SORT OF A ONCE-IN-A-LIFETIME THING.

FINE, BUT NO TALKING.

OK, SENATOR, WE'RE ROLLING.

OK, ROZ, I HAVE AN IDEA
IF YOU'RE INTERESTED.

SURE.

I HEARD THE NICEST STORY

ABOUT A... A SEATTLE MAN WHO TOOK
HIS 2 SONS UP ON THE ROOF OF THE HOUSE

TO TRY AND SEE MY MERCURY
SPACECRAFT COME OVER.

I LOVE THAT.

YEAH, WELL, I... I THOUGHT
YOU'D LIKE THAT ONE.

AND THEN IF WE COULD GET SOME
OF THE OLD MISSION BROADCASTS,

MAYBE WE COULD USE THOSE
FOR... FOR BACKGROUND.

DEFINITELY. YOU ARE
FULL OF GREAT IDEAS.

NO! I'M FULL OF GOOD IDEAS!

FRASIER, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

ROZ, YOU JUST AGREED
TO 2 OF MY SUGGESTIONS

WHICH PROVES YOUR PROBLEM
IS WITH ME AND NOT WITH THEM!

I'M SO SORRY. FRASIER, GET OUT!

ROZ, IT'S ALL RIGHT. THE
SENATOR AND I ARE OLD FRIENDS.

I TOOK THE LIBERTY OF RUNNING
A FEW IRRESISTIBLE IDEAS BY HIM

SO THAT I COULD PROVE MY
POINT AND LET YOU COME CLEAN.

THAT'S NOT WHAT YOU
TOLD ME. YOU USED ME.

I'M SORRY, SENATOR,
BUT... BUT IF I USED YOU,

IT WAS ONLY AS THE SWIFT AND
TERRIBLE SWORD OF JUSTICE.

IT'S TERRIBLE, ALL
RIGHT, AND OUTRAGEOUS.

YOU SAID THESE WERE YOUR IDEAS.

WHY'D YOU DO IT, SENATOR
GLENN? I'M SORRY, ROZ. I WAS...

I WAS MISLED AND...
AND I FEEL AWFUL, AND...

AND, YOU KNOW, IT'S NOT LIKE
ME TO BE THAT UNDERHANDED.

OH, IT'S ALL RIGHT.

FRASIER, GET IN MY BOOTH!

I AM SO SORRY, SENATOR GLENN.

WELL, I AM THE ONE THAT'S SORRY.

IT'S MY NATURE TO BE
HONEST, AND, YOU KNOW...

LISTEN UP, ROZ. I'M GONNA
TELL YOU WHAT I DID THIS FOR.

BACK IN THOSE GLORY DAYS
I WAS VERY UNCOMFORTABLE

WHEN THEY ASKED US TO SAY
THINGS THAT I DIDN'T WANNA SAY

AND DENY OTHER THINGS...

I AM SO MAD AT YOU, FRASIER!

OH, YEAH? WELL, I'M MAD,
TOO. SO JUST BRING IT ON!

SOME PEOPLE ASK, YOU KNOW,

"WERE YOU ALONE OUT THERE?"

WE NEVER GAVE THE REAL ANSWER

AND YET, WE'VE SEEN
THINGS OUT THERE,

STRANGE THINGS.

THIS IS MY PROJECT, AND I ASKED
YOU NOT TO TRY TO TAKE CONTROL,

AND NOW YOU'VE GONE BEHIND
MY BACK AND DONE JUST THAT!

BUT, ROZ, YOU DIDN'T
EVEN GIVE ME A FAIR SHAKE!

WELL, IF I DIDN'T, IT WAS BECAUSE
I WAS TRYING TO PROTECT MYSELF

BECAUSE YOU CAN BE
SO BOSSY SOMETIMES!

BUT WE KNOW WHAT
WE SAW OUT THERE

AND WE COULDN'T... WE
COULDN'T REALLY SAY ANYTHING

AND... AND THE BOSSES
WERE SCARED OF THIS.

THEY WERE AFRAID OF WAR
OF THE WORLDS TYPE STUFF

AND, AND ABOUT
PANIC IN THE STREETS,

AND SO WE HAD TO KEEP QUIET.

AND NOW WE ONLY SEE
THESE THINGS IN OUR,

WELL, IN OUR NIGHTMARES OR...

OR MAYBE IN THE... IN THE MOVIES

AND SOME OF THEM ARE PRETTY
CLOSE TO BEING THE TRUTH.

ALL RIGHT, ROZ.

I'LL ADMIT THAT MAYBE I WAS BEING
A LITTLE TOO ASSERTIVE, ALL RIGHT?

BUT THE LEAST YOU
COULD DO IS ADMIT

THAT PERHAPS YOU
WERE A BIT DEFENSIVE.

[making whooshing noises]

WELL, MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT.

BUT IT WAS BECAUSE I
WAS TRYING TO PROVE

THAT I COULD DO THIS ON MY OWN.

SO I WAS SHUTTING YOU OUT. I ADMIT
IT. IT WAS UNFAIR, AND I APOLOGIZE.

ACCEPTED.

OH, ROZ, COME ON.

OUR FRIENDSHIP IS MUCH MORE
IMPORTANT TO ME THAN THIS DOCUMENTARY.

OH, IT IS TO ME, TOO, FRASIER.

UH, LOOK, UH, ABOUT
WHAT I JUST SAID OUT THERE,

CAN WE JUST KEEP
THAT BETWEEN US?

OH, OF COURSE, SENATOR.

GOOD. WELL... OH, WAIT.

YOU WERE RECORDING ALL THAT?

WELL, YEAH, BUT THAT'S
OK. WE GOT PLENTY OF TAPE.

I'M GONNA NEED THAT TAPE.

[door closing]

HE'S A LITTLE TIGHTLY WOUND.

LOOKS LIKE MAYBE SOMEBODY
SHOULD CUT BACK ON THE OLD TANG.

THAT'S A GOOD ONE, FRASIER.

THANKS, ROZ.

WHENEVER YOU'RE READY, SENATOR.

SINCE THE DAWN OF TIME,
MAN HAS GAZED SKYWARD

AND DREAMED OF
REACHING THE STARS...

(Frasier) ♪ HEY, BABY, I
HEAR THE BLUES A-CALLIN' ♪

♪ TOSSED SALADS
AND SCRAMBLED EGGS ♪

MERCY.

♪ AND MAYBE I SEEM
A BIT CONFUSED ♪

♪ YEAH, MAYBE, BUT
I GOT YOU PEGGED ♪

[laughing]

♪ BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO ♪

♪ WITH THOSE TOSSED
SALADS AND SCRAMBLED EGGS ♪

♪ THEY'RE CALLIN' AGAIN ♪

SCRAMBLED EGGS ALL OVER MY FACE.

WHAT IS A BOY TO DO?

GOOD NIGHT EVERYBODY.