Felicity (1998–2002): Season 1, Episode 4 - Boggled - full transcript

PREVIOUSLY ON "FELICITY"...

JULIE DOESN'T HAVE A BOYFRIEND.

IS BEN INVISIBLE TO YOU?

I INVITED BEN TO
THE PARTY ON FRIDAY,

AND HE SAID YOU HAD
ALREADY ASKED HIM.

BEN AND I ARE JUST FRIENDS.

SO YOU LIKE BEN, TOO?

IT'S COMPLICATED, THOUGH,
BECAUSE I THINK BEN REALLY LIKES ME.

GOD. WOW.

REALLY?

OH, YEAH.



SO WE'LL, UH, TAKE A RAIN
CHECK ON THAT DANCE,

WHICH IS OKAY.

♪ OOH DE LA ♪

♪ OOH DE OH OH ♪

♪ OOH LE LO HA ♪

♪ OH DE LO HA ♪

♪ LO LA LO HO ♪

♪ HEY HA ♪

♪ HEY-EY ♪

♪ OH HEY HI DA DA ♪

Felicity: DEAR SALLY,

I'VE NEVER, EVER BEEN
MORE CONFUSED IN MY LIFE.

SOMETHING HAS HAPPENED.
SOMETHING I CAN'T BELIEVE.

SOMETHING I DON'T... I DON'T
EVEN KNOW HOW TO TALK ABOUT.



NOEL AND I WERE
HANGING OUT ONE NIGHT.

AND I'VE TOLD YOU,
LIKE, A MILLION TIMES,

HE WAS PRETTY MUCH THE MOST COMFORTING
PART OF BEING IN NEW YORK. [GIGGLES]

DON'T LOOK AT MY PAGE. HEY!

I FELT THAT I COULD GO TO
HIM ANYTIME WITH ANYTHING

AND THAT HE COULD COME TO ME.

WE HAD AN UNDERSTANDING.

OKAY, OKAY, NOW YOU'RE CHEATING.

NO, I'M NOT.

I'M FINISHED WRITING... NOW.

ALL RIGHT, YOU GO FIRST.

OKAY, THESE ARE THE WORDS
FROM THE NON-CHEATER.

MM-HMM.

STREET.

GOT IT.

TAKE.

YEP.

TAKER.

EXCELLENT.

CLUE.

STAKE.

CRETE... WHICH, I KNOW,
IS A PROPER NOUN. I JUST...

[NO AUDIO]

HICK.

AND HICKEY.

OKAY, WAIT. HOLD ON.

I-I GOTTA BACK UP HERE.

UM, I THINK THAT BEN AND I
HAVE BEEN GETTING CLOSER.

WHICH... GRANTED,
ISN'T SAYING MUCH.

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]

HOW'S IT GOING?

HEY.

I HATE THESE THINGS.

WHAT?

YOU GET ONE OF THESE... THESE
PRE-APPROVED CREDIT CARDS?

YEAH. I GOT THE SAME THING.

IT'S CRAZY. THEY CHARGE,
LIKE, 50% INTEREST.

YEAH, I KNOW. I THINK THEY
TARGET COLLEGE STUDENTS.

YEAH. I'M TEMPTED TO JUST
TAKE IT AND JUST USE IT.

WHAT WOULD YOU BUY?

I DON'T KNOW. I DON'T KNOW.

SO, UM, ARE YOU GOING
TO DINNER NOW? CAFETERIA?

NO.

I'M NOT EATING. I
GOTTA GO TRAIN.

I GOT TRYOUTS ON FRIDAY,
UH, FOR THE TRACK TEAM.

OH, WOW, YEAH.

WHEN YOU WON THE REGIONALS
LAST YEAR... THE 800-METER...

WOW, THAT WAS... THAT
WAS REALLY GREAT.

OH. HA HA. THANK YOU. THANKS.

I WAS THERE.

UM... SO ANYWAY, GOOD LUCK.

LIKE YOU NEED IT.

NO, I DO. I NEED IT. I NEED IT.

BUT, UM...

I'LL SEE YOU IN CLASS.

OH. YEAH, I KNOW WHAT I'D BUY.

UH... RUNNING SHOES.

YEAH, I'D BUY A COUPLE
OF REALLY GOOD PAIRS.

JULIE AND I ARE SORT
OF AT AN IMPASSE,

WHICH, UM, I'M
SURE WE'LL BE FINE.

I JUST... DON'T
KNOW HOW EXACTLY.

HEY.

HI.

HEY, DO YOU WANT TO
BORROW A DRYER SHEET?

NO, THANKS. I USED SOFTENER.

OH, OKAY.

YOU KNOW, YOU REALLY CAN'T BEAT
DRYER SHEETS FOR STATIC CLING.

[LAUGHS]

GOD, I WAS SUCH
A JERK. OBVIOUSLY.

I MEAN, I ACCUSED
YOU OF LYING TO ME

WHEN ALL YOU WERE DOING

WAS REALLY BEING THE BEST
KIND OF FRIEND I COULD HOPE FOR.

I'M... I'M SORRY. I REALLY AM.

OKAY?

YOU KEPT... REMINDING ME

THAT I COULD DO WHATEVER I
WANTED WITH BEN, YOU KNOW?

BUT I WAS SO BUSY MAKING SURE
THAT YOU WEREN'T GONNA GET HURT

THAT I-I SORT OF
LOST WHAT I WANTED.

WHICH... WAS WHAT?

I HAD A GOOD TIME WITH BEN.

I REALLY DID.

AND THAT'S... THE ABSOLUTE,
REALLY HONEST TRUTH.

IF YOU WANT TO DATE BEN, THEN...

THEN I SHOULD.

MM-HMM.

YEAH, I'M JUST, UM...

I'M GONNA LISTEN TO WHAT YOU'VE BEEN
SAYING TO ME FROM THE VERY BEGINNING.

AND INSTEAD OF YOU
PRODDING ME TO DO SOMETHING

AND ME NOT DOING IT
AND JUST FEELING CRAPPY,

I'M JUST GONNA DO
WHAT I WANT TO DO.

Man: DAMN IT!

SOME JERK PUT,
LIKE, FOOD COLORING

IN THE WASHING MACHINE

OR... OR DYE OR SOMETHING.

OH. THAT IS SO...

GOD.

HAVE YOU EVER
WASHED THIS BEFORE?

I'VE NEVER WASHED
ANYTHING BEFORE.

UM, AS A GENERAL RULE,

YOU MIGHT NOT WANT TO
WASH WHITES WITH COLORS.

OH. THEY SHOULD TELL
YOU THAT ON THE BOX.

OH.

THEY ACTUALLY DO.

OH. THANKS.

I FEEL MUCH BETTER.

ME TOO.

EVERYTHING'S PINK.

TODAY'S LAB WILL DEMONSTRATE

QUANTITATIVE RELATIONS
IN CHEMICAL REACTIONS...

HOW MANY MOLECULES
OF SUBSTANCE "A"

REACT WITH HOW MANY
MOLECULES OF SUBSTANCE "B"

TO GET HOW MANY
MOLECULES OF PRODUCT "C."

FIRST YOU HAVE TO
SELECT A LAB PARTNER.

MAKE IT SOMEONE YOU DON'T
DESPISE TOO MUCH, OKAY?

TRUST ME.

LET'S PAIR UP, GET STARTED.

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]

[HORN HONKS IN DISTANCE]

Man: NO, I DON'T.

SO, YOU WENT TO
PRIVATE SCHOOL, RIGHT?

WHAT? NO. WHY?

BUT YOU'RE GOOD AT THIS STUFF?

PROPERTIES OF MATTER,
GASEOUS STATES,

ATOMIC THEORY, DETERMINATION
OF MOLECULAR WEIGHT.

YOU'RE ASKING IF I'M GOING
TO DRAG DOWN YOUR GRADE

NOW THAT WE'RE WORKING TOGETHER?

YEAH.

YOU'LL BE RELIEVED TO KNOW
I GOT A's IN A.P. CHEMISTRY.

HEY, YOU CAN'T GET MAD

BECAUSE I ASKED
YOU THAT QUESTION.

I'M NOT MAD.

YOU'RE A LITTLE PISSED.

YOU'RE JUST...

I'M STRAIGHTFORWARD.

I HAVE QUESTIONS, I ASK THEM.

APPARENTLY.

ARE YOU SLEEPING WITH
OUR RESIDENT ADVISOR?

WHAT?!

NOEL, THE R.A.

YOU ARE UNBELIEVABLE!

LOOK, SAY IT'S NONE
OF MY BUSINESS.

IT'S PRETTY OBVIOUSLY
NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.

FINE.

AND OF COURSE I'M
NOT SLEEPING WITH HIM.

HE'S CUTE.

WHO?

THE GUY YOU'RE NOT
SLEEPING WITH... NOEL.

REALLY? WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

WHITE GUYS DON'T
USUALLY DO IT FOR ME.

BUT NOEL... DOES?
HE... DOES IT FOR YOU?

I DIDN'T SEE IT AT FIRST EITHER,

BUT THAT DAY I SIGNED
UP FOR THE LOTTERY,

NOEL TOOK MY SIGN-UP SHEET.

AND ALL OF A SUDDEN,

I FOUND MYSELF WONDERING
IF THIS GUY'S GOT A GIRLFRIEND.

OKAY, I KNOW THAT I'M,
UM, JUMPING AROUND,

BUT THIS IS IMPORTANT.

THE UNIVERSITY HAS THIS USED
DORM ROOM REFRIGERATOR PROGRAM...

WHOEVER WANTS ONE SIGNS UP.

IT'S LIKE A LOTTERY SYSTEM,
AND NOEL WAS IN CHARGE.

I GUESS HE LOOKED CUTE THAT DAY.

I DON'T REALLY REMEMBER.

ELENA MIGHT HAVE THOUGHT

THERE WAS SOMETHING
GOING ON WITH ME AND NOEL.

BUT I SWEAR TO GOD,
THERE WAS NOTHING!

AND YOU KNOW WHY
THERE WAS NOTHING?

BECAUSE NOEL
AND I ARE FRIENDS...

NEW, REALLY GOOD FRIENDS.

WHICH BRINGS ME BACK
TO WHERE I STARTED.

I MEAN, ALL WE WERE
DOING WAS SITTING THERE...

PLAYING BOGGLE.

HICK.

AND HICKEY.

WAIT A MINUTE. WHAT?

[DOOR OPENS]

UH, I'M JUST... OH,
NO, WE WERE...

I'M JUST... NO, THIS
ISN'T, UM... YEAH.

OH, GOD, I'M LEAVING. OKAY.

I SHOULD... UH... YEAH.

I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU DO.

WELL, I'M... I'M LEAVING.
OKAY, I'LL CALL YOU LATER.

THERE ARE LETTERS...

NO, NO, NO, I'LL
GET THE LETTERS.

OH, OKAY.

[DOOR CLOSES]

I THINK IT'S PREMIUM.

WHAT?

YOU HAVING A FORBIDDEN AFFAIR.

I'M NOT HAVING A
FORBIDDEN AFFAIR.

MAN, I HAD YOU PEGGED
FOR THIS UPTIGHT, NO-FUN,

LIKE, FOLLOW-THE-RULES,
KISS-ASS BORE.

WELL, THAT'S ACTUALLY MUCH
CLOSER TO MY PERSONALITY.

YOU AND THE R.A.!

YOU JUST WENT UP, LIKE, A NOTCH.

[DOOR CLOSES]

SALLY, YOU KNOW ME. I
DON'T GET CONFUSED EASILY.

WELL, THAT'S NOT TRUE, BUT
NOTHING COMPARES TO THIS.

NOTHING!

I'M... I'M SO SCREWED UP.

I DON'T EVEN KNOW
WHAT I'M FEELING.

I'M JUST... ON EDGE.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

[KNOCK]

WHO IS IT?

Man: REFRIGERATOR.

YOU FETICIRY PORTER?

FELICITY? YEAH.

IS THAT FRIDGE FOR ME?

THAT'S WHY I'M HERE.

OH.

WHERE DO YOU WANT IT?

UM...

OVER THERE, I GUESS.

I'VE NEVER HAD ONE BEFORE,
YOU KNOW... MY OWN FRIDGE.

YEAH. IT'S SORT OF A
SYMBOL OF INDEPENDENCE.

OWNING A 'FRIGERATOR,

BEING ABLE TO MAKE THE CALL...

WHAT GETS COLD, WHAT DOESN'T.

HEY.

YOU GOT A FRIDGE?

YEAH. DID YOU?

NO.

WELL, YOU MIGHT
STILL GET PICKED.

I'M SURE THERE ARE OTHERS.

NOPE. THAT'S THE
LAST 'FRIGERATOR.

CONGRATULATIONS.

I'LL SEE YOU IN CLASS.

YEAH.

TSK.

SO, ANYWAY, I'VE THOUGHT THIS WHOLE
NOEL THING THROUGH EXTENSIVELY...

AND I TRULY BELIEVE THAT THE MOST
MATURE WAY TO HANDLE IT, FOR THE MOMENT,

IS TO AVOID NOEL AT ALL COSTS
FOR AS LONG AS POSSIBLE...

[ELEVATOR DINGS]

EXCUSE ME.

WHICH IS ACTUALLY A
REALLY SAD FEELING...

AVOIDING SOMEONE WHO
MIGHT BE... YOUR BEST FRIEND.

THE THIRD POINT ON
THERE ACTUALLY IS, UH,

IS WHAT I WANTED TO
TALK TO YOU ABOUT.

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]

Man: WAIT UP.

HOW'S IT GOING?

HAVE YOU TRIED BLEACH?

YEAH.

YEAH, TWICE. I MEAN, NOT...

I MEAN... PINK'S... IT'S FINE.

IT WAS MY WHOLE WARDROBE, TOO.

PEOPLE ARE REFERRING TO
ME AS THE "PINK GUY" NOW.

OOH, NO.

YEAH.

EVEN MY JEANS, YOU KNOW?

MY FAVORITE PAIR OF JEANS.

REALLY?

YEAH. YEAH. THEY'VE
GOT THIS, LIKE, PINK GLOW.

AT LEAST, NOW YOU
KNOW. FOR THE FUTURE.

YEAH, WELL.

I'LL NEVER FORGET YOU
IF ONLY BECAUSE OF THAT.

WHERE ARE YOU SITTING?

[TELEPHONE RINGS IN DISTANCE]

HI.

HELLO.

WE GOTTA TALK.

EXACTLY. I KNOW.

I'M A BIG BELIEVER IN,
UH, DEALING WITH ISSUES.

OKAY, WHEN?

OH, UH, USUALLY IMMEDIATELY
AFTER THE ISSUE OCCURS.

I MEAN, WHEN CAN WE TALK?

OH. SHORTLY, FOR SURE.

OKAY. UH, TONIGHT?

TONIGHT? UH, I-I HAVE THIS,
UH, CHEMIS-CHEMISTRY LAB.

SO MAYBE AFTER?

AFTER THE LAB?

RIGHT. INTERESTING.

UH...

IS THAT...

WHAT'S TOMORROW?

WEDNESDAY.

RIGHT. BECAUSE TODAY'S TUESDAY.

RIGHT. IS WEDNESDAY BETTER?

UM... I'LL CHECK AND...
AND THEN I'LL KNOW.

AND THEN YOU'LL
COME AND TELL ME.

RIGHT. THAT'S THE PROCESS.

I WILL, UH, I WILL CHECK,
AND THEN COME TELL YOU.

AND, UH, THEN WE CAN TALK.

ALL RIGHT, JUST
FOR THE RECORD...

YOU'VE NEVER BEEN WEIRDER.

I KNOW.

IT'S REALLY COMPETITIVE,
YOU KNOW... THE FILM SCHOOL,

BUT I-I GET TO USE
THE 16MM EQUIPMENT,

AND, UH, HANG AROUND SOME
REALLY PRETENTIOUS PEOPLE,

WHICH APPARENTLY
BUILDS CHARACTER.

SO, YOU SHOWING IT TO PEOPLE?

MY MOVIE? UH, NO, NO.

IT'S, UM, IT'S A
WORK IN PROGRESS.

AND YOU'VE ALREADY
SEEN MY UNDERWEAR, SO...

IT'S PINK. RIGHT.

[GIGGLES]

AND THAT IS, UM, ALREADY
PRETTY PERSONAL.

THE TRACK WAS ON MY WAY
HOME. I JUST DROPPED BY.

I DIDN'T KNOW IF HE'D BE THERE
PRACTICING FOR HIS TRYOUTS.

I REMEMBER IN HIGH
SCHOOL WATCHING BEN RUN

AND WONDERING HOW HE
EVER LEARNED TO RUN LIKE THAT.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

[Sleepily] COME IN.

HEY.

HAVE YOU SEEN FELICITY?

SHE'S PROBABLY IN NOEL'S
ROOM, GETTING SOME.

GETTING SOME WHAT?

A LITTLE R.A. ASS OR WHATEVER.

WHAT?

SHE'S... SHE'S DOING THE R.A.

FELICITY?

I KNOW.

I DIDN'T THINK SHE
HAD IT IN HER EITHER.

SO, HOW'S THAT FRIDGE?

WHAT?

YOUR NEW FRIDGE.

ARE YOU ENJOYING
YOUR NEW FRIDGE?

YEAH, IT'S FINE.

GOOD.

IS IT COLD? INSIDE, DEEP DOWN?

YOUR NEW FRIDGE YOU
JUST HAPPEN TO GET?

WHAT'S YOUR OBSESSION
WITH MY FRIDGE?

I COULDN'T CARE LESS
ABOUT YOUR DAMN FRIDGE.

WELL, WE REALLY SEEM TO
BE TALKING ABOUT IT A LOT.

IT'S HOW YOU GOT THE THING.

WHAT?

I SIGNED UP FOR THE REFRIGERATOR
ETHICALLY, BY THE BOOK.

I FILLED OUT AN APPLICATION,
AND I HANDED IT IN.

SO DID I.

ARE YOU REALLY THIS UPSET

THAT THEY PICKED MY
NAME AND NOT YOURS?

IT'S JUST ANOTHER
EXAMPLE, THAT'S ALL.

OF WHAT, A REFRIGERATOR LOTTERY?

AND YOU DIDN'T EVEN
THINK HE'S ATTRACTIVE.

THE GUY WHO
DELIVERED THE FRIDGE?

I KNOW ABOUT YOU AND
THE RESIDENT ADVISOR.

[STUDENTS GASP]

DON'T TRY TO DENY IT.

YOU JUST WENT WHITER THAN USUAL.

WHO TOLD YOU THAT?

THAT HALLOWEEN
COSTUME YOU LIVE WITH.

AND IF YOU WANT TO
KNOW WHY I'M SO UPSET,

IT'S BECAUSE IF A PROCEDURE
AS BENIGN AS A FRIDGE LOTTERY

IS SUSCEPTIBLE TO
SEXUAL CONSPIRACY,

WHAT DOES THAT SAY
ABOUT THE WHOLE SYSTEM?

YOU THINK I'M DATING
NOEL TO GET AN APPLIANCE?

I THINK YOU'RE DATING NOEL
AND GETTING AN APPLIANCE.

[SCREAMING]

WE NEED TO TALK.

I KNOW. I CAME TO YOU TODAY
AND SAID THE SAME THING,

AND YOU WERE A CYBORG.

COULD WE...?

YEAH.

[MOVIE CONTINUES ON TELEVISION]

PEOPLE ARE SAYING
THINGS... ABOUT US.

PEOPLE ARE... LIKE WHAT?

WELL, THAT WE'RE DATING.

AND HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THAT?

I JUST...

I THINK WE NEED TO FIGURE
OUT WHAT'S GOING ON HERE,

THAT'S ALL.

I AGREE.

THAT'S WHY I MADE DINNER
RESERVATIONS FOR TOMORROW NIGHT.

8:00.

WHAT?

YOU AND ME.

WE'RE GOING OUT,
AND WE'RE GONNA TALK.

LIKE... YOU... YOU
MEAN, LIKE, A DATE?

LET'S JUST CALL IT WHAT IT
IS... A DINNER RESERVATION.

AND WE'LL HAVE A DISCUSSION
ONCE WE GET TO THE RESTAURANT,

AND DETERMINE WHY
WE'RE THERE AND WHAT IT IS.

TOMORROW NIGHT
AT 8:00. NO OPTIONS.

NO OPTIONS?

WELL, U-UNLESS
YOU CAN'T MAKE IT.

NO. OKAY.

YOU MADE THE
RESERVATIONS, SO... LET'S DO IT.

OKAY.

TOMORROW NIGHT.

OKAY.

AND SO TOMORROW NIGHT AT 8:00,

NOEL AND I HAVE... A MAYBE DATE.

Man: RIGHT WHERE LOUIE
HAD SAID IT WOULD BE.

IT'S AMAZING WHAT 5 BUCKS
WILL BUY YOU IN THIS TOWN.

WE WAITED UNTIL THEY LEFT AND
USED THE KEY WE'D FOUND ON THE BODY.

I HAD SAL CHECK OUT THE
BACK. HE SAID SHE WAS THERE.

I COULD ONLY THINK ONE THING...

IF SHE WAS DEAD, SHE'D NEVER
SPEAK OF THE HORROR I COMMITTED.

AND IF SHE WERE ALIVE,
SHE WOULDN'T BE FOR LONG.

THAT WAS GREAT.

COME ON.

SERIOUSLY. I LOVED THE
WRITING AND THE ANGLES.

SO, DO YOU HAVE ANY
IDEAS, ANY THOUGHTS,

TO, YOU KNOW, MAKE IT BETTER?

NOT REALLY.

COME ON.

PLEASE.

I REALLY DO NOT KNOW
ANYTHING ABOUT MOVIES AT ALL.

BUT YOU'RE A MOVIEGOER. YOU KNOW
MORE THAN YOU THINK. REALLY. GO AHEAD.

WHAT WAS THAT LITTLE
SQUIGGLY LINE AT THE END?

[LAUGHS] OH. THAT'S, UM...

THAT MARKS WHERE I'M
GONNA HAVE AN OPTICAL EFFECT.

LIKE A... LIKE A FADE-OUT.
THAT'S GONNA BE A FADE-OUT.

[LAUGHS] I FEEL SO STUPID.

OH, NO, NO, NO. NO,
THAT'S GREAT. WHAT ELSE?

OKAY. I DIDN'T REALLY
UNDERSTAND HOW DONNIE DIED.

REALLY?

YEAH, BECAUSE YOU
SAW THAT HE HAD A GUN,

AND THEY WERE FIGHTING.

BUT THEN THE NEXT SHOT, UM,
FREDERICK'S DRIVING THE CAR,

AND I NEVER SAW HIM DIE.

IT'S CONFUSING.

UH-HUH.

AND IT WAS ALSO DISORIENTING

WHEN THOSE GUYS WERE
AT THE TABLE TALKING.

W-WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

WELL, THEY... THEY LOOK LIKE

THEY BOTH WERE LOOKING IN
THE SAME DIRECTION OR SOMETHING

AND NOT AT EACH OTHER.

OH, THAT'S... THAT'S
JUST A TECHNIQUE.

IT'S, UM... YOU CAN EITHER
CROSS THE LINE OR NOT.

I THOUGHT IT WAS
REALLY CONFUSING

BECAUSE IT KIND OF LOOKED LIKE THEY
WERE LOOKING AT THE WALL OR SOMETHING.

UH-HUH.

OH! [SNAPS FINGERS] AND
WHAT WAS THAT THING?

THAT BLACK THING IN
THE... THE DINNER SCENE?

THAT WAS A MICROPHONE.

YOU KNOW, I ONLY HAVE
THIS ROOM FOR THREE HOURS,

SO I SHOULD REALLY
GET BACK TO WORK.

ZACK, I THOUGHT IT
WAS REALLY GOOD.

THANKS.

[CHAIR SQUEAKS]

ZACK, I'M SORRY. I D...

THANKS FOR THE POPCORN.

[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]

[DOOR OPENS, KEYS JINGLING]

[DOOR CLOSES]

HEY. UM...

ARE... ARE THESE YOURS?

YEAH.

THEY WERE IN MY REFRIGERATOR.

OH, I KNOW. I HAVEN'T
DONE THAT SINCE I WAS A KID.

IT FEELS SO GOOD...

COLD UNDERWEAR IN THE MORNING.

HEY, COULD YOU DO ME A FAVOR

AND, UH, NOT PUT YOUR
UNDERWEAR IN MY FRIDGE?

WELL, THEY'RE NOT DIRTY.

AND ALSO, WHERE'S MY APPLE?

I ATE IT.

I THOUGHT WE HAD AN
AGREEMENT... GIVE AND TAKE.

YOU THOUGHT WE HAD AN AGREEMENT?

WE DON'T HAVE AN
AGREEMENT ON ANYTHING.

WE'VE NEVER EVEN HAD A
REAL CONVERSATION BEFORE.

I REPLACED YOUR STUPID APPLE.

WITH A TUB OF "I CAN'T
BELIEVE IT'S NOT BUTTER!"?

IT TASTES SO MUCH LIKE BUTTER.

THAT'S NOT THE POINT.

FAKE BUTTER DOESN'T
EQUAL AN APPLE.

AND ON A BIGGER NOTE, HOW
THE HELL COULD YOU TELL ELENA

ABOUT ME AND NOEL?

DAMN! I WAS PROUD OF YOU! SORRY!

YOU SHOULD KNOW,
WE ARE NOT DATING.

ALL YOU ARE DOING IS
SPREADING FALSE RUMORS.

FINE. I'LL TELL YOU WHAT.

FROM NOW ON, I'LL
KEEP MY MOUTH SHUT,

AND MY UNDERWEAR
OUT OF YOUR FRIDGE!

[DOOR OPENS]

THANK YOU.

[DOOR CLOSES]

[MUSIC PLAYS]

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]

[MUSIC STOPS]

ARE YOU OKAY?

I WENT TO GO SEE
THIS GUY ZACK'S MOVIE.

[SIGHS] REMEMBER THE GUY
FROM THE LAUNDRY ROOM?

THE PINK GUY?

YEAH, THE PINK GUY.

WHAT? DO YOU HAVE A
THING FOR THE PINK GUY?

BY THE WAY, I HAVEN'T
SEEN BEN SINCE I SAW YOU.

OH, YOU DON'T HAVE
TO EXPLAIN THAT.

I KNOW. I JUST...

YOU WERE WONDERING.

YEAH... I WAS.

THANKS.

[SIGHS] ZACK SHOWED ME
HIS MOVIE, AND I CRITICIZED IT,

AND HE GOT MAD.

I DON'T KNOW. I-I GUESS I
SHOULDN'T HAVE DONE THAT?

WHAT? GIVE HIM YOUR OPINION?

I MIGHT HAVE BEEN
A LITTLE HARSH.

ARE YOU OKAY?

[FOOTSTEPS APPROACH]

NOEL KISSED ME.

YEAH, I HEARD.

YOU HEARD? MEGHAN TOLD ME.

I CAN'T BELIEVE HER!

I'M GLAD YOU TOLD ME, THOUGH.

SO... WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?

WELL, TONIGHT, NOEL
AND I HAVE... A MAYBE DATE.

SO, DO YOU LIKE HIM?

I REALLY LIKE HIM,

BUT, LIKE, IN THAT
BEST-GUY-FRIEND WAY, YOU KNOW?

I CAN'T BELIEVE HE KISSED YOU.

[BOTH LAUGH]

I KNOW.

WHICH MEANS, TONIGHT, I'M
GONNA HAVE TO LET HIM DOWN

AND JUST HOPE

THAT WE CAN STILL BE
FRIENDS AFTERWARDS.

YEAH.

I'VE ALWAYS MANAGED TO
AVOID GIVING THAT SPEECH.

REALLY? HOW?

USUALLY, I-I JUST...
DATE THEM ALL...

UNTIL THEY BREAK UP WITH
ME, WHICH SOUNDS HARDER,

BUT IT'S ACTUALLY A
PRETTY EFFICIENT SYSTEM.

WOW.

HMM.

HEY.

HEY.

SO, YOU GET MY MESSAGE?

WHICH ONE?

AFTER TRYOUTS TOMORROW,

THE TRACK TEAM'S GOING
TO THE WHITE HORSE TAVERN.

I THOUGHT YOU
MIGHT BE INTERESTED.

BUT ARE YOU?

I MEAN, DO YOU NOT LIKE ME?

JUST TELL ME 'CAUSE I'M
RUNNING UP A PHONE BILL.

IT'S NOT BECAUSE
I DON'T LIKE YOU

OR BECAUSE I DIDN'T HAVE A REALLY
GREAT TIME WITH YOU THAT NIGHT.

WELL, WHAT?

YOU'RE AFRAID OF HAVING
JUST TOO GOOD A TIME,

YOU COULDN'T HANDLE IT?

I MEAN, WE BOTH KNOW
WHERE THIS WOULD GO.

WE WOULD GO OUT
FOR A FEW WEEKS...

WE MIGHT LIKE EACH OTHER.

FOR A WHILE.

AND THEN IT WOULD
GET UGLY OR BORING,

AND WE'D BREAK UP.

AND THEN FOR THE NEXT FOUR YEARS,
EVERY TIME WE'D SEE EACH OTHER,

IT WOULD BE AWKWARD
AND UNCOMFORTABLE.

LET'S JUST... FEEL AWKWARD

WITH THE OTHER PEOPLE THAT
WE'RE GONNA DATE AND BREAK UP WITH.

DON'T YOU THINK?

ARE YOU AT ALL DOING THIS
BECAUSE OF FELICITY OR...?

I THINK THAT YOU'RE
A REALLY SPECIAL GUY,

AND I-I JUST WANT TO
KEEP ON THINKING THAT.

AND THAT YOU'RE
NOT JUST PURSUING ME

BECAUSE I DON'T RETURN
YOUR PHONE CALLS.

YOU KNOW THAT'S NOT TRUE.

NOW I ALWAYS WILL.

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]

[SOFT MUSIC PLAYS]

[SILVERWARE CLANKING]

WHAT?

NOTHING.

WOULD YOU EXCUSE
ME FOR A MINUTE?

SURE.

[CHUCKLES]

[SIGHS]

[DIAL TONE]

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

HELLO?

HI, IT'S ME. I'M AT THE
RESTAURANT WITH NOEL.

ARE YOU OKAY?

It's a little weird.

WHAT?

HE JUST... HE LOOKS
REALLY CUTE TONIGHT.

WHAT?

AM I CRAZY?

ARE YOU DRINKING?

NOT THAT I DON'T THINK
HE'S HANDSOME. I'M JUST...

NO, WE HAVEN'T HAD ANYTHING.

I'M JUST A LITTLE, UM...

I JUST... I HAD TO CALL YOU.

TAKE A DEEP BREATH.

[BREATHES DEEPLY]

And just remember...

YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT.

I CAN?

AND NOEL'S A GREAT GUY.

HE IS, ISN'T HE?

And just... have fun tonight.

OKAY. THANK YOU.

YOU'RE WELCOME.

[COIN JINGLES]

[SLOW MUSIC CONTINUES]

[INDISTINCT
CONVERSATIONS CONTINUE]

[SIGHS]

SO, UH, WHEN DOES THE
ACTUAL TALKING START?

UM... IT CAN START RIGHT NOW.

OKAY. [CHUCKLES]

WHO FIRST?

ME.

OKAY.

I KISSED YOU THE OTHER NIGHT.

YOU KNOW THAT.

NO, YOU WERE THERE.

IT WAS SOMETHING THAT I'VE
WANTED TO DO FOR A LONG TIME.

I MEAN, SINCE I MET YOU.

AND I CAN'T
BELIEVE THAT I DID IT,

NOT JUST BECAUSE I'VE... I'VE
WANTED TO DO IT FOR SO LONG

OR BECAUSE I WAS SO NERVOUS...

THEN WHY?

I CAN'T BELIEVE I DID IT...

BECAUSE I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND.

WHAT?

SHE DOESN'T LIVE
HERE. SHE'S IN CHICAGO.

YOU WHAT?

I'M JUST IN A... IN A REALLY
CONFUSED STATE OF MIND RIGHT NOW.

YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND
AND YOU KISSED ME?

WELL, IT WASN'T LIKE
A... A PLANNED ATTACK.

THAT'S, UM... UM...

ARE YOU KIDDING?!

I'M... I'M TELLING
YOU THIS 'CAUSE...

'CAUSE I WANT TO BE HONEST.

HONEST?!

DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE?

YEAH. A... A PHI... PHILANDERER.

A FAKE!

YOU'RE A MANIPULATIVE PHONY!

GOD, YOU WERE... I
THOUGHT I COULD TRUST YOU.

FELICITY... BUT
YOU'RE JUST... I'M...

YOU'RE JUST EVERY LONG-DISTANCE
GIRLFRIEND'S WORST NIGHTMARE,

IS WHAT YOU ARE.

WHAT IS HER NAME?

UM, IT'S HANNAH.

HANNAH? HER NAME IS HANNAH?

[SIGHS]

YOU... YOU'RE DISGUSTING!

HE'S DISGUSTING!

C-COULD YOU SIT DOWN, PLEASE?

I FEEL SORRY FOR YOU, AND
I FEEL SORRY FOR HANNAH,

AND THAT ISN'T THE WORST PART.

THIS POOR GIRL IS IN CHICAGO,

OBLIVIOUS, THAT
THE MAN SHE LOVES

IS OUT RIGHT NOW ON A MAYBE
DATE WITH ANOTHER WOMAN.

HOLD ON A SECOND.

I'VE BEEN A REALLY GOOD
FRIEND TO YOU, OKAY?

LISTEN... LISTENING TO ALL YOUR
PROBLEMS, GIVING YOU ADVICE.

WHICH I CAN NO LONGER TRUST.

GETTING YOU THAT FRIDGE.

I'VE DONE EVERYTHING I
COULD TO MAKE YOU HAPPY.

WHAT DO MEAN GETTING
ME THAT FRIDGE?

I-I MADE SURE YOU GOT ONE
OF THOSE REFRIGERATORS.

AND I-I NEVER WANTED
A "THANK YOU" FOR IT.

I AM FEELING PHYSICALLY...
AND EMOTIONALLY REVOLTED.

GOODBYE.

[HORN HONKING IN DISTANCE]

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

I WANT YOU TO HAVE THIS.

WHAT?

TAKE IT. IT'S YOURS, OKAY?

I DON'T WANT A PITY FRIDGE.

IT'S NOT A DAMN PITY
FRIDGE. I DON'T USE IT.

SO EITHER YOU TAKE IT

OR GIVE IT BACK TO THE UNIVERSITY
FOR ANOTHER STUPID LOTTERY.

YEAH?

YEAH.

YOU CAN, UM...

YOU CAN USE IT
WHENEVER YOU WANT.

THANK YOU.

THANK YOU.

OH, AND, UH, YES, HE
DOES HAVE A GIRLFRIEND...

NOEL.

OH, YEAH?

YEAH. SO... I'LL SEE YOU IN LAB.

Felicity: IT WAS JUST
LIKE HIGH SCHOOL.

ONE TIME I WATCHED BEN
TRY OUT FOR THE TRACK TEAM.

HE HAD TO COME IN FIRST OR
SECOND TO MAKE THE TEAM.

THAT DAY IN HIGH SCHOOL,
I JUST STOOD THERE...

QUIETLY WATCHING...

WANTING TO CHEER HIM ON,
BUT JUST QUIETLY WATCHING.

GENTLEMEN, COME FORWARD.

HE CAME IN FIRST
THAT DAY, OF COURSE.

AND HERE I WAS, IN THE
EXACT SAME SITUATION...

SET.

3,000 MILES AWAY.

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

YOU... YOU DIDN'T
SAY, "COME IN."

WHICH DIDN'T SEEM TO MATTER.

RIGHT.

RIGHT. DO YOU KNOW
WHERE FELICITY IS?

[BLOWS]

I HEARD HER ON THE PHONE

SAYING SHE WAS GOING TO SOME
TRACK-TEAM THING OR SOMETHING.

[BLOWS]

OH.

[BLOWS]

[DOOR CLOSES]

[MAN YELLS INDISTINCTLY]

MAYBE ONE OF THE
REASONS BEN RUNS SO FAST

IS JUST THAT HE LOVES IT.

THAT MUST BE AN
AMAZING FEELING...

BEING SO GOOD AT
SOMETHING YOU LOVE.

♪ AM I BREATHING? ♪

♪ IT FEELS LIKE I'M TOUCHING
YOU FOR THE FIRST TIME ♪

♪ IT'S NOT THE FIRST TIME ♪

♪ THE SWEETEST TREASON ♪

♪ LYING NEXT TO YOU ♪

♪ BEFORE OUR LAST WAVE GOODBYE ♪

♪ THE MOMENT THAT
WE CLOSED THE DOOR ♪

♪ WE HUNG OUR HALOS ♪

♪ KNOWING WHAT
WE CAME HERE FOR ♪

♪ IF NOT FOREVER ♪

♪ UNTIL THE MORNING AFTER ♪

♪ THE MORNING AFTER ♪

♪ I WATCH YOU SLEEPING ♪

♪ KNOWING THAT I'LL NEVER
SHARE THIS BED WITH YOU ♪

♪ AS MUCH AS I WANT TO ♪

♪ I'M NOT WEEPING ♪

♪ BUT I'M OVERWHELMED BY
HOW WE SEALED OUR FATE ♪

♪ NOW IT'S TOO LATE ♪

♪ THE MOMENT THAT
WE CLOSED THE DOOR ♪

♪ WE HUNG OUR HALOS ♪

♪ KNOWING WHAT
WE CAME HERE FOR ♪

♪ IF NOT FOREVER ♪

♪ UNTIL THE MORNING AFTER ♪

♪ THE MORNING AFTER ♪

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

WHO IS IT?

UH, IT'S THE PINK GUY.
OPEN UP... PLEASE.

I DIDN'T MEAN TO
BE SO... REACTIVE.

YOU WERE SUCH A GRUMP.

I KNOW. BUT WHAT...
WHAT I DIDN'T TELL YOU WAS

THAT... I'VE NEVER SHOWN MY
MOVIE TO ANYONE... BEFORE.

NO ONE.

SO... THERE WAS A LOT RIDING
ON EVERY WORD YOU WERE SAYING.

YOU WERE STILL A GRUMP.

I KNOW.

BUT, UM, I WAS THINKING
ABOUT WHAT YOU SAID.

YOU KNOW ABOUT DONNIE,
AND THAT SCENE IN THE KITCHEN,

AND VICTOR, AND, UM,

I... I CAME UP WITH SOME THINGS,

WHICH I THINK REALLY
MAKE IT BETTER.

SO IF... IF YOU WOULDN'T
MIND WATCHING IT AGAIN

AND TELLING ME WHAT YOU THINK...

I'LL DO THAT.

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]

Man: YEAH.

I-I MET HANNAH MY SENIOR
YEAR OF HIGH SCHOOL.

SHE WAS A JUNIOR.

WE'VE BEEN GOING OUT
FOR ALMOST TWO YEARS.

SHE'S PRETTY.

I KNOW.

LAST YEAR, WHEN I WAS HERE,

UH, HANNAH WAS A SENIOR
IN HIGH SCHOOL IN BOSTON.

WE SAW EACH OTHER
ON THE WEEKENDS.

IT WAS ALMOST LIKE I HADN'T
EVEN GONE AWAY TO COLLEGE.

BUT SHE'S AT NORTHWESTERN
NOW, SO IT'S DIFFERENT.

WE KNEW THAT IT'D BE TOUGH.

WE SAID THAT WE COULD SEE
OTHER PEOPLE, IF WE WANTED.

AND THAT'S A HARD ADJUSTMENT.

AND, UM... SHE'S MY
FIRST GIRLFRIEND.

WHY ARE YOU TELLING ME ALL THIS?

BECAUSE... YOU WERE
RIGHT, WHAT YOU SAID.

THAT BEING OUT WITH YOU
LIKE THAT WASN'T FAIR TO HER.

AND I WANTED YOU TO KNOW...

THAT EVEN THOUGH IT DIDN'T
LOOK LIKE IT, I DO RESPECT HANNAH.

I LOVE HANNAH.

I KISSED YOU FOR
A MILLION REASONS,

BUT ONE OF THEM...

I'M SURE...

IS THAT I MISS MY GIRLFRIEND.

AND FOR THAT, I'M JUST
REALLY, REALLY SORRY.

[HORN HONKING]

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]

HI.

HEY. WHAT'S GOING ON?

I WAS JUST WALKING BACK TO
THE DORM. HOW ABOUT YOU?

NOTHING.

THERE WAS A GUY
PLAYING BALL WITH HIS DOG.

I WAS WATCHING THAT.

IT WAS A LITTLE DOG.

THEY LEFT A LITTLE WHILE AGO.

[SIREN WAILING IN DISTANCE]

HOW'S THE TRACK TEAM?

I JUST...

I JUST DECIDED THAT I DIDN'T
REALLY HAVE TIME FOR IT RIGHT NOW.

REALLY?

YEAH.

YEAH. I GOTTA CONCENTRATE
ON CLASS AND STUFF, SO...

[INDISTINCT
CONVERSATIONS CONTINUE]

[WAILING CONTINUES]

I'M GONNA HEAD BACK TO THE
APARTMENT, SO I'LL SEE YOU LATER.

YEAH.

["SECONDHAND" BY
WEAK LAZY LIAR PLAYS]

♪ TODAY I FEEL SECONDHAND ♪

♪ I COULD TELL YOU
WHERE I'VE BEEN ♪

♪ WHERE I CAME FROM ♪

Sally: DEAR FELICITY...

♪ WHO I BELONGED TO ONCE ♪

♪ BUT THAT'S MEMORY ♪
IT'S FUNNY,

♪ I DON'T WANT TO THINK ABOUT IT NOW ♪ YOUR
CRISIS WITH NOEL IS HOW JOHN AND I GOT TOGETHER.

♪ SO, THINGS COME AND THEY GO ♪
WE MET AT A GARAGE.

I WAS GETTING MY
CAR SMOG-CHECKED,

AND HE WAS GETTING SOME
PART FOR HIS MOTORCYCLE.

♪ MOST DAYS I AM LONELY, LIKE
THANKSGIVING ♪ WE BECAME FRIENDS.

♪ LIKE THE COUGHING
OF AN ENGINE ♪

♪ THROUGH THE TREES ♪
AND A FEW MONTHS LATER,

WE WERE AT DINNER
AT A RESTAURANT,

♪ TODAY I AM SINGULAR ♪
AND TO MY COMPLETE SHOCK,

♪ AND SHUDDERING ♪ JOHN LEANED
ACROSS THE TABLE AND KISSED ME.

♪ I SETTLE DOWN ♪

♪ I PULL MY COAT AROUND ME ♪

♪ ON A PARK BENCH WITH PIGEONS ♪ I'M JUST SAYING,
YOU KNOW, YOU CAN'T KNOW WHO THAT PERSON IS,

♪ AND THE LOUD ♪ THE PERSON WHO
WILL BECOME YOUR ULTIMATE CONFIDANTE,

♪ ABSENCE OF SOUND ♪
YOUR SOUL MATE, OR YOUR LOVER.

♪ HERE IS NOVEMBER ♪

♪ CHRISTMAS LIGHTS STRUNG ♪ HE MAY BE
SOMEONE YOU'VE HAD YOUR EYE ON FOR YEARS,

♪ IN THE LANE ♪ OR HE MIGHT BE THAT
GUY STANDING NEXT TO YOU IN TORN JEANS

♪ BLEED ONTO THE PAVEMENT ♪
BUYING SOME PART FOR HIS MOTORCYCLE.

♪ BLINKING IN THE RAIN ♪

♪ THEY GO OFF AND ON ♪ WHOEVER
IT IS, HE STARTS OFF AS A STRANGER,

♪ OFF AND ON AGAIN ♪
SO... IT COULD BE ANYONE.

SINCE JOHN, I THINK
ABOUT THAT QUITE A BIT.

[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYS]

[MUSIC ENDS]