Farscape (1999–2003): Season 3, Episode 6 - Eat Me - full transcript

Upon arriving at the rendezvous coordinates with minimal life support in their transport pod, Crichton, D'Argo, Chiana, and Jool are forced to dock with a nearby Leviathan bearing a ...

This pod is falling apart.

It's all I can do to keep
her afloat. Chiana?

It's not my fault, Crichton.

I looked away for a microt and
Jool grabbed the controls.

I didn't say it was your fault.
Give me status.

It's not holding!

Oh, you're getting mank

Shut the frell!
This is your fault!

- Look, there's Moya.
- Let's just... -Pilot, Aeryn, come in.


That's not Moya.

That's a Leviathan with
a control collar.

That means Peacekeepers.

O-2 level's falling.

- Telemetry. Comms. Neuro-status.
- We got nothing.

All right, we're heading for that ship. That's it.
- John, that is not an option!

We don't have any options, unless you want
to die out here in the middle of nowhere.

It's better than being captured,
tortured and killed by the Peacekeepers.

Do you hear that noise?
That's our air!

- We have no comms.
- We have no idea who

or what is on that ship.

You are leading us to our death.

All right, that's it.
Everybody out!


What happened here?

That smell.

If there were Peacekeepers,
they'd be here by now.

Well, this section's airlocked,
so someone wants us here.


What the hell's going
on out here?

I told you we shouldn't
have come here.

My name is John Crichton...
I'm lost... an astronaut.

I got shot through a wormhole... In
some distant part of the universe...

I'm trying to stay alive...

Aboard this ship...
This living ship...

Of escaped prisoners.
My friends.

If you can hear me...

If I make it back...
Will they follow?

If I open the door...
Are you ready?

Earth is unprepared... Helpless,
for the nightmares I've seen.

Or should I stay...
Protect my home...

Not show them...
You exist...

But then you will never know
the wonders I've seen.

It's gone.

Burnt, battered, busted.

Ding dong, the Pod is dead.

It can't be dead, Crichton. You have to
fix it and you have to get us out of here.

Ain't gonna happen. Not unless
we can replace that stuff.

We need threekay wire
and narium coils.

All right, we find it,
we might stand a chance

and that means a scavenger hunt
in that direction.

Look, can't we just borrow one
of their Transport Pods?

- There aren't any.
- I already looked.

No Transport Pods.

Not a single piece of
escape craft.

It's like everybody who
could leave, has left.

This place is bad voojo.

It's a Leviathan like Moya.

So spare parts, this way.

I'm getting back in the Transport
Pod and I'm staying there.

Thank frek.

No, you stay with her, Chiana.

No way.

Pip, Transport's all we got.

Oh. I'm warning you, I'm going to
end up killing that redheaded tralk.

Whatever. Go on.

Spare parts.

That way. Let's find 'em.




And there's no threekay wire
and definitely no narium coils.

Anybody home?

Anybody out there?

Do you wanna give me a hand
here? It's jammed.

Or maybe there's a Pilot
keeping it shut.

Or a host of Peacekeepers

or thousands of feral hippie
boy's friends and relatives.

It's a bit late to worry
about that.

Let's just get what we need
for the Transport Pod

and get the frell out of here.




The comms are down.


Could be the control collar.

All right, we know the
layout, right?

Okay, narium coils, threekay wire,
got to be on Tiers Three and Four.

Either that, or we head
straight for Pilot.


What you got, bigum?


Sebacean bones, maybe.

All right.

This way.

Abbott and Costello in
The House of Horror.

You know, we should talk
to the Pilot.

He could tell us where to find
all the stuff we need.

Ah, Crichton.

In here.

Whoa! Oh, man, that smells
worse than Rygel.

Well, almost. Get in.

- Yep, threekay wire. Good call.
- How'd you know?

It's a wild guess.

This duct leads to the
klestron filters.

We'll have to scrape
out what we can.

Ho! Oh, man, that's pus!

The ship is oozing pus, man.

Yeah, this whole ship
is diseased.

Oh, geez. No DRDs.
What's that about?

It's like she got hit by some
kind of biochemical weapon.

Narium coils, tier seven.

Uh-uh. We got to find
the Pilot.

Crichton, we get what we
need and we get out.

What we need is the guy who
controls the Maintenance Bay doors,

the hangars, the whole
damn ship in fact.

This was meant to be a hit-and-run
mission so we get the parts that we need.

And what if we’re dying?

What if we've been exposed to
some radiation or some virus

that's gonna mutate us into the
Night of the Living Dead?

Then the sooner we get
out of here, the better.

If you want to go all the way to Pilot...
- Hey, you know what...

then you're tinked!
- we don't know what we're dealing with, here.

This is a Peacekeeper
prison ship.

That's all you need to know.

I'm going to go find the Pilot.
You get the junk.

What was that?


External gyro-sensor.

You broke it.

I did not! It just fell.

I don't believe this.

What? Where are you going?

Join the treasure hunt.

Well, Crichton said
to stay here.

Yeah, well he didn't
know about this.

Well, you can't leave me.

The comms are down.

There's a... there's a pulse
rifle on the Transport Pod.

How do I open this door?

You know, we don't have
weapons on our planet.

We don't have violence.
We don't have war...

What the frell?

Oh frelling hezmana!



You'll get the hang of it.

Good luck with the pulse rifle.

I hope you're a fast learner.

What the hell?

Holy mother of God.

- Easy.

I'm not going to hurt you.

My name is Crichton.

I live on a Leviathan.
We have a pilot. He's...

kinda like you.

What happened to you?


kill me.

Come on...

Come out and play.

Don't mind me, just...

just talk amongst yourselves.

Especially you.

Stay back.

Stay back!

What about your comms?
Atmosphere? The doors?

Can you control any of that?

My neural pods slashed.
Please kill me.

Look, your arms are going
to regenerate.

Growgan. Cut urr!

Grogan? Who the hell is Grogan?

Growgan... Growgan cut!

Growgan cut!

They cut your arms?

And when they grow back,
they hack 'em off again?

Why the hell would
they do that?

Because, because...

because they're eating me!

Stay back...

Stay back!

I don't want to hurt you.


D'Argo! Crichton!


You want lunch?

How about her?






Who are you?

Where's Chiana? The Nebari?

Stay back!

Stay back or I swear
I will kill you.

I don't think that's
very polite.





Pilot, what's going on?

Starburst without any warning?
For yotz sake!

But we've left Crichton and
the others stranded.

Votched up all my second lunch.

It better be something
good, Pilot.

Moya was responding
to a distress call.

Perhaps you can see
for yourself.


Crais, come in.
This is Aeryn.


Pilot, there's no answer
from Crais.

Nor is Moya getting any
answer from Talyn.

What happened to you?

Aeryn, what can you see?

He's been hit hard.

Pilot, any other ships
in the area?

Not that I can tell.



We have... we have to give
him the death rites.

- We have to give him...

I'm sure there's a bunch of
Oricans around here.

Damn it! We should've
stuck together.

I wanted us to stick
together but he...

we... both of us, were too damned stubborn.
- No, no, no, it's not your fault.

Chiana, D'Argo is dead.

Jool's God knows where, and
we have been here before.

No, we haven't...

They're eating the ship.

This is a Leviathan.

It's like Moya.

It's alive.

We have to get out of here. We have
to... we have to get out of here.

Yes, we do.

Okay, okay. I can do this.

I can, I can do anything.

That's what my father told me.

That's what my mother told me.

And I've never doubted
them before...

Maybe once or twice.

But I shouldn't doubt them.

I should believe in them.

And I should...
believe in myself!

Oh, I don't think this is right.
I shouldn't be here.

I'm a civilized being.

There's got to be someone here
who recognizes that.

I just need to find them.




He's disarmed.


All right, Pilot.
Nariam coils, where are they?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I get it.

I... I, you know, I get it.
I come forward, you scream.

I move back et cetera,
et cetera, et cetera.

Pilot, I'm over.
You're gonna help me.

You're gonna give me something and
you're going to give it to me now!

Talk to me. Slowly.

This... ship...

Rovhu... was... was...


Detention ship... prison ship.

Ship for...

for the... krishool.

What the hell is that?

The criminally insane.

The criminally insane.

We fix the Transport Pod,
we get outta here.

We got threekay wire.
It's a start at least.

He controls the whole
ship, Chiana!

He's got the Maintenance Bay,
he's got the doors,

he's got the windows, he's got
the smoke on the water.

I don't know what you're
talking about.

The guy! Whatever, whoever.

The one that killed D'Argo.
Doctor Spike.

Kaarvok. Kaarvok. Spike.

Kaarvok. That's his name?

Bring Kaarvok.
Ah, bring him back.

What's a PK prison convoy doing way
out here in the Uncharted Territories?

Peacekeeper convoy...

Ambushed convoy.

Scarrans ambushed.

We drifting.

Ah, not to Starburst...
not to go.

Nowhere to go...

No one helps.

We... starve.

What's the big fuss?

Why the red carpet treatment?

His power...

And the others.
The other prisoners.

What's their deal?

There were no other prisoners.



They'll never get to him now.

Never, ever.

They had a whole prison ship
for one prisoner?

What about all this other
vermin we're seeing?

The hungry, hungry hippies?



They were Peacekeepers,
all of them.



He's venting the chamber!

I wish you wouldn't talk about
me behind my back.

No... No!

No! No!





Help me.

Help me!

No, you are not taking
him back to Moya.

He is still alive, Rygel.

We can fix that.

What are you...
Give me the transponder.

The ship is shutting down.
Give it back.



Oh, that's what we're
hoping for.

Look, if you want to have it out
with Moya, you can go right ahead.

Listen, you bartantic bitch.

Talyn's supposedly the meanest, deadliest,
all-time yave-of-the-yuvo fighter ship.

But somebody, something,
beat the yotz out of him.

And when they come back
to finish him off,

we'll be here with him,


And if we can keep him alive,
we might find out what happened.

Oh, in another arn or two
it won't matter.

Let's go. While we still can.





Let her go!


Okay, okay.

Come... come...

Okay, okay.

Two Chianas.


She... she... and I'm me.


I'm me.


She... she... she was
just a clone.

A clone, so I'm...

I'm the real me.

I'm the real me.

D'Argo's dead.

Chiana's dead.

Oh, yeah.

Oh yeah, I can feel it.

That sick Hammer Horror
son of a bitch,

he's going to be sucking my
brains through a sippy straw,

and it ain't making me
feel comfortable!

Now see I head for the Transport Pod
and he runs me down like a sick lizard

or... we take back control.

- We patch your ass back in.

- We vent the chambers

You can't.
- and suck his ass out into space.

No, no, no.
- Pilot, Pilot, Pilot.

You listen to me.
We can do this.

We find Jool, we take
back control.

You and me, buddy.
Good things are gonna happen.

Good things.

Are you comfortable in there?

Oh, do settle.
You're being very angry.

What have you done to me?

D'Argo, I saved you
from the Xarai.

You know, they're
completely uncivilized.

What have you done with Chiana?


The Nebari!

The gray girl.


Very, very, very, very nice.

Really, very nice.

Were you close?

What have you done with her?

I haven't done anything.

Last I heard she was having her
best bits eaten by the Xarai.

As I said, they're uncivilized.

It's you I'm more
concerned about.

What have you done with me?

I saw...

Yes? You saw?

What did you see?

Another D'Argo?

You cloned me.

Not the word clone, please.

I doubled you.

I... twinned you.

Two D'Argos,
equal and original.

And tasty.

I've never twinned
a Luxan before.

Why me?

We're going to make babies.

Chiana in two.

Two... two of me?

Two. Forked!

He copies you.

That's what he does.

Two Chianas.

Think. Think.

Kaarvok must've found a way to
patch himself into Rovhu.

Forced Control System.

Installed security of
the Peacekeepers.

Yeah, but she's still alive.

Not conscious life.

Tertiary life support.

You feel that?

Its... uh...

Can't work the console.

I'm coming up.

I can double you again.

And again and again.

Look at the Peacekeepers.

What Peacekeepers?

All over the ship.

The Xarai, I call them.

Private joke.

I once had a tame vangern
called Xarai.

As you can see, once you've
been twinned 30 or 40 times,

you're not much good
for conversation.

Not that you're especially
witty right now.

Hold still!

I can help you get
off this ship.

Why should I want to do that?

Because this ship is dying.

It's rotting to pieces
all around you.

This is my home.

All I need is more...
what, food?


Is there a difference?

D'Argo, you know how
painful it is.

I'm willing to spare you the
pain of a whole half cycle,

as long as you breed for me.


With what?

D'Argo, meet Belima.

I'm sorry, I...

I think I twinned her
a little too often.

Rovhu has no power enough.
Takes time to charge.

Still nothing.

No, can't even...
lights... no use.

Pilot, don't give up here.

You're all I've got,
you understand that?

I need you, big boy,
and you need me.

Come on.

Central pluxus cable.

Central... pluxus cable.



- Quite simple, Rygel.
- I'm taking the Pod and collecting the others.

Take plenty of food with you.

There'll be nothing here
when you return.

I'll be back within the arn.

You're leaving us chained
to Talyn?

Crawling along at hetch three.

Towing him is the only way.


We should be Starbursting.

We can't Starburst.
You know we can't.

We can.

If you try anything when
I am gone,

whatever you have in the place
of mivonks and wherever they are,

they will be gone
when I get back.

We give her 300 microts.

Then we cut ourselves free from
Talyn and we Starburst.

Talyn will recover.

Crais may not.

I suspect that now is not the
right moment to abscond.

Come on, dammit, John.

Remember the sequence.
You know the sequence.

Remember the damn sequence. You
know what you're doing here. Come on.

Hey, Kaarvok! It's just
you and me now!

What do you say we meet for
some coffee or something?

I'm sure we've got lots of
stuff we could talk about.

We'll cook you up something
special, K-man.

It's gonna take
a little while.

We're gonna hit you with
some Starburst Supreme!




Help me.

Oh. Oh. Um...

Are you sure I'm...
not interrupting something?

Chiana, just hurry up.



Because you know, I... I could just
leave you there if... if you want.

It's... it's no trouble.

No, no, no, hurry, hurry,
hurry, hurry.


Narium coils.

I'm coming.


Thank you.



That's where I was aiming.

Where's Crichton?

I dunno. We got separated.
Maintenance Bay's this way.

Where did you get separated?

D'Argo, we got the stuff
we need, okay?

We got threekay,
we-we-we got narium...

Pilot's Den. Come on, this way.

No, I'll go search for him.
You go back.

No way. I'm not gonna split up.

Chiana, go and get the
Transport Pod ready.

Give me a quarter of an arn
and I'll meet you there.


What's that I hear? Is that...


We can't Starburst.

We're in a control collar.

Oh, yes, we can Starburst.

Just means this whole ship
is toast.

Schmick light show, baby.

You want to try that again?
Bring it on.


This is the best way.

'Cause it's going to be quick.

And it's gonna hurt a lot
less than being eaten.

Still haven't learned
how to use it.

I nearly shot myself
with a pulse rifle!

What the frell?

This ship won't Starburst.
It's not strong enough.

Maybe she just needs
to recharge.

I don't think so, brain sucker.

I can arrange my own death.

Hurry up, Chiana.

I'm going as fast as I can.



What the hell are you still
doing here, Kaarvey?

Others will come.

More and more of you will come.

To me, my family,

my farmland...

my... my perfect...

perfect dish.



Hey, kids!

It's dinnertime.

And it's finger lickin' good!

John! John, can you hear me?



Are you okay?

Yeah, we'll talk about it
later. Come on!

Jool, you're alive!

Well hurry up!
Chiana, let's go!


Hold the door!

Jool, you're alive!

Come on.

Come on, you piece of junk.

It was over in a flash. No
more than a tenth of a microt.

But I saw it. I saw... myself.

Another me.

Do you remember the
actual moment?

No, I don't remember
anything except...

it was a corpse.

It was just a copy. A fake.

I keep telling myself that,
but then this Crichton,

and Kaarvok, he said he'd
created two equal and original.

Boll-yotz! Kaarvok was
full of it.

Then how do you know that
I am not the copy?

Maybe the real D'Argo is dead.

Because you just know!

You know.


How is...


Still tied.

I doubled you.

I twinned you.

Equal and original.