Farscape (1999–2003): Season 3, Episode 22 - Dog with Two Bones - full transcript

Moya wants Talyn's remains in a sacred Leviathan place. But another Leviathan won't allow it. The crew's last mission together is to help fulfill Moya's wishes. After that, everyone goes their separate ways. Crichton discovers a secret of Aeryn's.

Previously on Farscape.


Massive radiation.

I've never felt better.

The, uh, other Crichton.

He's dead.

I just can't watch that
happen again.

We were so perfect, and
you're just like him.

I mean, you are him.

No, I'm me.

You give me what I want,
or I swear,

I will keep you alive so that you can
witness your homeworld's destruction!

I suggest you hang on
to something.



This ship is dead!

The wormhole experiment is over.


Fly safe.

We all knew the time would come
when we'd split up.

In the beginning I would never have
even believed it could take so long.

Don't think I'm going
to miss you.

Any of you. I'm not.

Well, maybe a little bit.

And now, on Farscape.


It doesn't work.

Oh, yes it does.

Just not for the wedding.



You wear this and somebody's
gonna marry you.

Come on, Crichton.

I've been to a few
different places.

Your world can't be that
hard to adjust to.

You still have to ask her.

Doesn't work that way.

Might I interject?

Would you like some yirgra
fungal chowder?

Oh, well.

Perhaps Aeryn wouldn't have
liked your planet anyway.

Okay, big moment.

You're up.

- Come on.

Sarge it.


Again. Ch...

Sarch it.

Where's she from?

Like Bosnia?

Charge it.


Thank you.

I told you.
- No, look, that was good.

She almost understood
what you said.

That was completely

Baby, look, English is a
very difficult language.

Half the time people don't
understand what I'm talking about.

You're doing great.
- No, I'm not.

Nobody here understands
what I'm saying.

This whole frelling planet
needs translator microbes.

Hey old woman, why didn't you
leave with the others?

Because I knew the souffle
would charm you.

Chowder, you said it
was chowder.

I can make you a chowder.

Pip, who is that woman?

I thought she was with you.

Look at this.

Pilot, I'm seeing
another Leviathan.

We have arrived at the
Leviathan Burial Place.

D'Argo, how much
are you taking?

Macton's posting is a long
way away. Thanks.

You could resupply during
the journey.

Well revenge is a feast best
served immediately.

You're going to get
yourself killed.

We all are.

At least we'll do it on our
home planets.

I'm surprised that Crais
sacrificed himself.

Talyn was such a fine ship.

I can't believe this is all
that's left of him.

So what are you gonna do
after we bury Talyn?

Same thing I'm doing now.
Working on wormhole theory.


D- d-darkness.

M- M-Moya...


Pilot, is everything okay?

No, Commander.

Brace for collision, everybody!

Brace for collision!
- Pilot!

Oh, praise the spirits! I'm
never gonna finish this recipe.


My name is John Crichton...
I'm lost... an astronaut.

I got shot through a wormhole... In
some distant part of the universe...

I'm trying to stay alive...

Aboard this ship...
This living ship...

Of escaped prisoners.
My friends.

If you can hear me...

If I make it back...
Will they follow?

If I open the door...
Are you ready?

Earth is unprepared... Helpless,
for the nightmares I've seen.

Or should I stay...
Protect my home...

Not show them...
You exist...

But then you will never know
the wonders I've seen.

Total crap. Completely dead.
Pilot, how long?

Soon. Moya is rallying
herself to recovery.

That lunatic Leviathan's
still out there?

- Hasn't moved.
- Just staring us down.

Central pumping mechanism
is a total loss.

Tier Three is underwater.

Conduit bulkhead breach.

Janz-two torpedo could not
have done it better.

That crazy tralk really knew
where to hit us, didn't she?

Moya's nerval crytex is impossible
to target so successfully,

unless by another Leviathan.

Pilot, what the yotz
brought this on?

I still haven't made contact
with the other Pilot.

However, it appears to have
something to do with Talyn.

Oh, Talyn again?

I told you we should have
dumped his debris.

We wouldn't even be here.

Without Talyn you wouldn't be
here. So show some respect.

Respect! My tiny, shiny heinie.

It's gonna get us killed.

And who the frell is this?

One, two, three.

And reroute Moya's systems to
help in the recovery process.

Does everyone know what to do?




Pay attention!

This is serious.

Yeah, it's a good plan.

Thank you.

Thank you very much. Thank you.

That's my cousin Susan.
- Aeryn, John.



Tonight you are the second
luckiest man on Earth.

Know what I mean?

Though still groggy,
Moya informs me

that each of this Leviathan's
last three offspring

were captured and enslaved
by Peacekeeper hunters.

And she won't let Talyn be buried in the
Sacred Space because he's half Peacekeeper.

This ship is quite irrational and as
we've seen, prepared to enforce her edict.

Can't you work this out
with the other Pilot?

He has yet to return my
communication, but I'm trying.

Mmm, that's certainly true.

Oh. Ahh!

Pay attention.

Oh! Fahrbot!

When we get out of this, are you still
gonna look for that ex-Peacekeeper unit?

Can you keep the light on
where I'm working?


They assassinate people, right?

The squad aims to stop
terrorism and protect people.

Didn't you learn anything on
the Command Carrier?

Want some advice?

Look Jool, I'm not
Crichton's mate.

I'm not tied to him in any way.

In the short time I've known
you, you've changed so much.

Don't go backwards.

Assassinating people...

seems like going backwards.

Can you melt that?

With what?
There's no power yet.

- Thank you.


Hamman side's tight.

Looks like Moya's
gonna be okay.


Hey, you know... you know what
I said before about...

about not wanting you
to come with me?

That wasn't exactly right.

Pip, it's cool.

Where you been?

Not now. This is not right.

I would love you to
come with me.

But you know, I...

I gotta find my brother and he's
in this resistance thing, and...

and as if I'm gonna find him hanging
out with someone who looks like...

A Peacekeeper?

It's cool.

What are we gonna do if this crazy tralk
doesn't let Moya into the burial grounds?

Perhaps I could offer the
benefit of my training.

What, how? As a chef?

And doctor. Instructor.

And among many other
disciplines, negotiator.

Listen Wrinkles, how about you
just stick to the chowder.

You can deal with the
old frelnik.


I can't see!

God! Ah!

Go to the truth.

It calls in your own tongue.

Ignore it

and risk all.


Get down! Get down!


What the frell happened to him?

Ah... ah, nothing. Nothing.
He'll be fine.

What did you do?

Perhaps a slight misjudgment
of his weight.

It won't occur again,
I'm certain.

So am I.

Aeryn, D'Argo, the Leviathan
killed her own Pilot.

Nutrient starvation.

Why would she do that?
- I'm not sure,

but she threatens to
attack again

if Moya does not take Talyn's
remains and vacate the area.

Never one to say I told you so,
but shall we go?

Well, I can't believe I'm
agreeing with Rygel,

but under the circumstances,
with Moya injured...

Moya feels Talyn has earned the right
to be buried in the Sacred Space,

and she will not yield.

Don't you ever get bored, living on
the same planet, never going anywhere?

And what about living
in a house?

It's too quiet, there's
no engine noise.

Well wait till summer, when the
air conditioning kicks on.

John has this fantasy about us

having kids and dogs and
the pool and barbecues.

Must seem a strange culture.

Jack, I am miserable here,
and he just doesn't see it.

I'm going to get married,
end up like Betty Crocker.

I just keep wondering when
he's gonna wake up.

I'm awake.

You all right?


between the witch
and the Luxan...


The other Leviathan killed her own
pilot, and Moya won't back down.

Uh... Can Moya beat her?

Damage is too great.

We could dodge for a while,
but eventually...

We have to cut and run.

Pilot can't convince her and,
uh, Chiana and Rygel are trying.

Sparky and Pip?


If you untie me, I shall
volunteer again to mediate,

even... even though I...
I know that, um...

Who is that woman?
- I don't know.

Listen, Moya,


everyone is, uh...

is really concerned,
about your plan.

I... I mean, even Aeryn
thinks that...

that maybe Talyn should be laid
to rest someplace else.

I once, um...

I once asked Zhaan...

how... how she got along
with you so well.

She... she said that the...
that the key...

that the key was to be honest.

Was to be honest.

No matter what.

Well, Moya...

this... this is what I think.

I think that you should bury Talyn
wherever you frelling wanna bury Talyn!

And I think that... that the
frelling tralk should...

should get out of our
frelling way.


That's what I think.

Hey, Crichton. Where ya been?

What is all this?

I went shopping.


Does this color go with my eyes?
- No, no, you don't have any money.

Lifting. Shoplifting.

But look. Look at these cool
presents I brought the bridesmaids.

You and Aeryn can give
them to 'em.

Sit down.


Hey, I spent some time
with the boys.

Think I found who the
best man is.

W- w-why are you doing this?

Why can't you just act like
you always have, fit in?

Why... why do you have to sleep
with all of my friends?

Oh, this is such a
repressed culture!




Dad! Hi!


Son, your mother has been
gone for so long.

This is not right.

That's not right.

- I do not agree, John.
- I think she has a point.

Ya see?
- D'Argo, you don't even know how to fly your ship.

I do, in theory.

And it certainly has enough
firepower to destroy a Leviathan.

It's just not right.

Why does it always have
to be your plan?

It doesn't.

But I don't think that Moya

is going to let us kill one
of her own species.

I have some information.

And it's worse than we thought.

Apparently, Moya is not the first to be attacked
by this rogue Leviathan. -Go on. Fly away. Go on.

Three others are already dead.
- Go on, shoo! Shoo, shoo!

Still more grievously injured.

Hang on!

Apologies. Moya is now
responding defensively on her own.

Moya understands the grief
of losing a child.

However, this female's behavior
is unacceptable.

She asks for your help.
- Yes.

She has our backing
no matter what.

Moya knows, which is why she feels
comfortable making this request.

Kill the rogue Leviathan.


All right, old girl.

Not you.

I'll prime my ship.
- Kill?

Yes, Commander.

Before she kills us.

So you'll be there?

Yeah, but Chiana can handle it.
- Just be there.

Chiana midwifed Talyn's birth.

She shouldn't have to
bury him alone.

I don't make errors.

The Leviathan can't
be stationary,

but be sure it's not
moving too fast.

I know.
- It's not too far but it's not too close either.

Do you want me to shoot the
frelling thing myself?

Even though it's a disturbed creature,
you're still about to take a life.

Are you going to be
okay with that?

Be careful.
- I don't have to fly with D'Argo.

I heard that.

Now do you remember everything
I told you about flying the ship?

Almost nothing.


Pilot, we are in position.

Moya, it's time Talyn
was laid to rest.

In the Sacred Place.


Okay, you ready?
- Yeah.

We're in. We're in.

What the yotz is so sacred
about this?

All right, we've got that
rogue's attention.

She's now following us.

Yes, I see her, Rygel.

Look, keep it steady.

If I don't get accurate resonant
capture, then we're all done for.

I thought you said this thing
only responds to your DNA.

It does, that's why I covered
all the controls...

Ooh. That's why I'm
wearing gloves.

D'Argo, Crichton.

This Leviathan is a lot
larger than Moya.

The best I'll be able to do
is annoy her.

That's all right.

Just keep her within range.

We'll give the slijnot
something to focus on.

As soon as I see Talyn's
remains, I shall commence a firing run.

I'm just waiting on a
go ahead from D'Argo.

I understand, it's difficult.

It's not difficult.

Yes, it is.
Everybody thinks you're freak.

Everyone thinks I'm a freak.
Hey boys, how are they biting?

Terrible, Mr. D'Argo.
- Can you help again?

See, they don't think
I'm a freak.

What the hell are you doing?

What do you think I'm doing?

I'm not entirely sure,
but don't kill Aeryn.

I'm not gonna kill anyone!
Why are you so disagreeable?

I'm not disagreeable. I got things on my mind.
- You are being disagreeable.

I am sorry that Aeryn is leaving
you but don't take it out on me.

I heard she left you
at the altar.

Shut up.
- Hey!

It's not just Aeryn.

You're all leaving.

Whenever you thought you'd found a
wormhole, you fell over yourself to dive in.

Don't begrudge us our dreams.

I don't.

It's just a hell of a dream you
got there, D, killing a man.

I don't want to kill him,
I just want revenge.

What do you think you're doing?

Don't horde the silver, John. I think
you should head straight for Earth.

No, that's not an option.

The Peacekeepers would follow.

You know, I should never
have come here.

I should never have come to Earth.
I should have left you guys on Moya.

If it's such a simple choice,
why are you agonising over it?

Because I'm an idiot.

Yeah, you are an idiot.
I'm an idiot, we're all idiots,

Aren't we, boys?
- Yeah.

Everyone's an idiot.

Speaking of idiots...

That cannot be right.



One shot.

And you said I'd never
fit in here.

I never said that.

Yes, you did.
- No, I didn't.

I remember, you did.

He's armed and he's dangerous!


He, uh...

he was our protector.

Our family.

Ah, may I say a few words?


He was a lost soul...

searching for...

Talyn was special.

A joy to his mother and a credit
to his species. Both of them.

With fondness, we lay Talyn, offspring
of Moya, to rest in his sacred ground.

The rogue is making a
run at the debris.

Moya pleads with you not to let
her disperse Talyn's remains.

Commencing attack.

- Here she comes, D'Argo.
- Right where you want her.

Good job, Aeryn. She's veering
away from Talyn and chasing you.

All right, let's do it.

Very effective.

Did you get her?

She's gone.



They got her.

You know what this means?

It means we're done.

Talyn rests where he belongs.

Scorpius has no ship.

We're all unhurt, healthy and
no one's trying to kill us.

It means finally, we can
go where we want.

We can go home.


We're going home.
I'm going home.

Who are you, old woman?

It doesn't matter who I am.

But I know who you are.

You made them come back and rescue our
lifepod after the Command Carrier imploded.

I'm no longer a prisoner
because of you.

So when the others got off,

I stayed on Moya to
repay the debt.

By messing with my mind.

Oh, no. No, I would never...

leave this on boil for so long.

Would you like some before it...
- What did you do to me?!

We all lie.

The lies that spew outward do much less
damage that the ones that stay hidden.

When I was a kid,

I dreamed of outer space.

And then I got here,

and I dream of Earth.

Lately, none of my dreams work.

Do you know why?

Trying to make it the
way it was,

the way it... never was.

Did my herbs help you?

They stripped away the lies.

But I ran from it.

And I am so tired of running.

Show me again.

Forward is the truth.

It's the lies that restrain us.

You will know.

May I cut in, son?


Everybody, I want to propose a
toast to my son, and my new daughter.

You all know their incredible
story, the odds they had to beat,

the good fortune that brought
'em home, safe and sound.

So please join me in wishing the new
Mr. and Mrs. Crichton all the best...

- No!

No. No. No.
- Get down!

See truth!
- Everybody run!

See truth.

See truth. See it.

Confront your fear.

No. No. No, baby, no.

You're gonna be all right.
You're gonna be all right.

Don't you worry about me.

I've never felt better.


No, no!


Well, then, John.

Tell me.

What did you expect?

It's a nightmare.

What is?

My life. My dreams.

Earth and my friends. I...

I tried to merge the two.

They're incompatible.

Then choose one.

I... can't go to Earth.

And my friends are all leaving.

You blame yourself.

Dog with two bones.



Animal. It's a pet.

He has this bone. It's the most
important thing in the world.

He carries it everywhere
he goes, and, uh...

one day he goes down to the water,
and he sees another dog with a bone,

reflected on the surface.

It's identical and he wants
that bone, too.

So he opens his mouth
to grab it,

and his bone falls in the water
and it disappears.

It's gone.

And he's left standing there
looking at himself.

And he has nothing.

Is this doag smart
enough to learn?

Yeah, it's too late.

It is never...

If the doag could have
had only one bone,

which would it have wanted?

I'm coming with you.

No. I'm sorry.

Well, you're not leaving
without me.

What do you want?


I'm afraid it's not
that easy for me.

You see, you died.

I watched that happen,
and yet you're still alive.

I have to go.

Then say goodbye.

We don't say goodbyes.

We do this time.

You see, you leave and then
you come back and I...

I can't handle the in
between, Aeryn.

Say goodbye.

Fine. Goodbye, Crichton.

John! My name is John.

"Goodbye, John" to my face.

Guarantee you won't die
in my arms again!

Guarantee me you won't
die in mine.

I can by leaving!

Do you love John Crichton?

Not him.

Not me.

John Crichton.


Then what does that taste like?



Well, nobody can compete
with that.

I am so much better dead.

I can't do this again.

And I can't let the one thing I love
fly away in a crappy little ship.

You once said it was as if the
fates meant for us to be together.

And I believe that.

Well then if it's true we
will be together again.

Running away is not fate, Aeryn.

Running away is running away.

Fine, you want fate?
Here. I've got fate.

Fate. Here.
- What?

Coin toss.

What, like that side up,
you stay?

Absolutely. Fate.

Just make a frelling wormhole
and go home.

There is no home.

There is no wormhole.

There's only y...


anywhere in the universe,

you pick the planet.

It's too late for that.

It's not too late.
- No, you're not listening to me.

It's too late for me.

You do this and we'll never
see each other again.

Do you love Aeryn Sun?

Beyond hope.

Then don't make me say goodbye
and don't make me stay.

Anything positive I do with
the rest of my life will be because of you.

Take care, my friend.

You better not forget me.

You better not ever forget
that I love you.

Of all the lesser species,

I admit I've grown to
like yours the best.

We're in the hands of fate now.

We have to trust in that.

Fly safe.

Goodbye, John Crichton.

Crichton? Still alive?

Out of fuel?


Yeah, Jool, I'm...
almost out of fuel.

Pilot, I'm heading back.

The human subconscious is
a fascinating place.

Malleable. Permeable.


Harvey, you gotta get your
nose out of the dictionary.

Guess what I found there, John?

Go away. I don't feel like
talking right now.

I will honor your wishes, John.

However, having chosen our
partnership above all else,

your wellbeing is now
irrevocably mine.

My gift.

Be forgiving.

Be kind.

Better angels.

Her life.

Her world.

On her time...

you will know...

Aeryn is...

with child.

Aeryn, why didn't ya tell me?

Why didn't you trust me?

Old woman!

Pilot! Patch me through
to Aeryn.

She is beyond our range,

Get a fix on her position.
We're going after her.

Hold on a microt!

Damn it, just do it!

First, we'll go to my... aah!

Obey his command, Pilot.

Pilot, please.

For the love of God, please.

Uh, I shall approximate Officer Sun's vector
and initiate chase upon your retrieval.

Commander! Stay clear...

We're... being... pulled in...

You have got to be kidding me.