Eight Is Enough (1977–1981): Season 1, Episode 5 - Turnabout - full transcript

Dad, is growing old catching?

Oh, yes, very contagious.

Does it hurt?

At your age, no. At my age, yes.

Is that why everybody thinks
David's new girlfriend is too old for him.

Oh. Well, no, it's just because people
feel the man should be older, stronger.

How come?

Because...

- Have you brushed your teeth yet?
- Yeah.

- Have you washed your face?
- Yeah.

Go eat breakfast.



Every time I ask something no one
wants to tell me, they say, "Go eat."

I'm gonna end up being the
fattest, dumbest kid in California.

Hey, Tommy, do
you believe in God?

Yeah.

Think he knows everything
about everything?

Well, he's supposed to.

Think he ever does anything
about what he knows?

Hmm, I don't know.

If he knew I was the one who
spilled chocolate syrup on the rug...

would he do something?

I don't know about him,
but Mom sure would.

It wasn't me. I was
just kidding. Tommy.

Oh, listen, you, in
the kitchen. KP duty.

And you, anywhere
but here. Quietly.



Daddy, how long is Mom
gonna be on the phone?

Sandy Watson's supposed
to call me about tonight.

Oh. Well, I presume Sandy
Watson would know enough...

to hang up and call again
at a reasonable interval.

- What if he calls someone else?
- Then he's a jerk.

You're better off doing your homework
and hoping for a brighter tomorrow.

Daisy, now listen, don't forget to
mark it down on your calendar, okay?

Oh, I know it's
exciting, I can't wait.

I'll talk to you in a couple
of days. Okay, bye-bye.

Ooh, she took the bait.

And I want all you kids at the
party. Every last one of you.

Just what did you use as bait?

I told her that your boss got us
four tickets, four box seat tickets...

to the production of Mame.

Oh, terrific. Two weeks from tonight,
the Maxwells are gonna come here...

expecting an extravagant
evening on the town.

Instead, they're gonna
walk into a homesy folksy:

"Surprise! It's your
25th anniversary!"

Well, Tom, what
else was I to say?

I mean, she could've
canceled out at the last moment.

I mean, isn't it a little like
promising someone caviar...

and then giving them tuna
fish signed "With Love"?

I got it. It might be...

Sandy Watson. Will
you tell me something?

What did 15-year-olds do before
the invention of the telephone?

- I think they got married.
- Oh.

Uh, use the phone
as much as you want.

What, what?

Take your time.

Of all the lame...

Sorry I yelled, okay?

If you're so smart, you turn it
over. Go on. Start the bloody thing.

If you hadn't been so
horn-happy, I wouldn't have stalled.

All right, all right. I'm
sorry I honked, okay?

Why don't you let me give you a
shove, so we can get out of this mess?

Yeah, yeah, there's a gas
station about a mile down.

- Sorry I yelled, okay?
- Okay.

- Sorry I yelled.
- Hey, what's your problem?

The lady made a mistake.
You never made a mistake?

Will you take a look at that?

Well, the mechanic won't be
in till Monday morning. Sorry.

You mean you can't fix it?

Oh, we don't need a mechanic.

We need new distributor
wires. I can fix it.

I don't carry anything here
but fan belts and radiator hoses.

Call one of the parts stores.

They're closed.

Till Monday morning.

Oh, for the I... This is
the capital of California.

You'd think a person could go out
without worrying about getting stranded.

Well, can I fill her up for you?

- What are you looking for?
- Cab company.

Hey, listen, uh...

if you're not married, or, uh, engaged,
or, uh, living with a linebacker...

or celibate...

I'd really like to
take you to dinner.

Celibate?

That is the weirdest
line I've ever heard.

- I'm starving.
- Great.

My name's David Bradford.

Any relation to the man
that writes the column?

Just by blood. He's my dad.

I'm Jennifer Linden.

Pleased to meet
you, David Bradford.

Even if you do honk your
horn a little too quickly.

Yeah, it's a character failing.
I'm, uh, trying to correct it.

Well, maybe you could help.

Well, I'll try over dinner.

Uh, first, a detour
by my place, all right?

All right.

We don't have much
time to get things ready.

Would you remind me to call David
to make sure he's gonna come?

Why don't you just
open the door and shout?

I saw him doing his laundry
out there when I put out the trash.

Uh, he was doing his laundry.
He just split a few minutes ago.

Hey, what do you
mean, who split?

David. Soon as his shirt and pants
dried, he jumped in them and took off.

He didn't wanna
be late for a game.

We're gonna be late. Mary, didn't
you tell David we needed a ride?

I thought you were
gonna tell him. What...?

Mom. What...?

Oh, Mary. Um, okay, the keys
are on the dining room table.

- Thank you.
- Thanks, Papa.

I think we better take
a picture of the car.

- So we remember what it looks like?
- Yes.

- You live here all alone?
- Uh-huh.

There's, uh, an open bottle
of wine in the wine rack.

Just take me a second to change.

You're an artist.

No. Just a hobbyist.

Really?

You know, I bet I haven't
ridden in a van in 10 years.

It's just as awful
as I remember it.

Let's go sit down.

- So, uh, you're not an artist.
- No.

And I am not a divorcée
collecting alimony, either.

And I'm not independently
wealthy, and I'm not...

All right, all right. Uh,
I confess I'm curious.

Since by now I've,
uh, figured out...

that my dinner budget probably
doesn't, uh, stack up to yours.

I can cook us spaghetti, okay?

Okay.

I'm a construction worker.

I'm an assembly
committee consultant...

on legislation relating to
finance, commerce and insurance.

Very impressive title.

Are you impressed?

Only if you can cook too.

Well, hang on to your appetite.

Oh, hi, ladies.
How was the game?

It was great. Uh,
David wasn't there.

Hmm? No, no, no. I
meant, uh, who won?

If one of us didn't show up
where we were expected...

it would register 10 on the
Richter scale around here.

Amy Vanderbilt would
pick silver, she can afford it.

What for?

Traditional 25th
wedding anniversary gift.

We have to get something for the
Maxwells. Something nice and dignified.

Oh, Dad, not too dignified. I
mean, dignified's expensive.

Tasteful even is probably
a little high-priced.

I would, uh,
suggest appropriate.

Appropriate you might be able to afford
without cutting back on our allowances.

Boy, oh, boy, I never knew you
two girls were so centimental.

That's centimental with a C.

So, what's it like,
being in politics?

It's terrific, if you can get
past all the bull-flinging.

And if you're a woman, there
are a few special problems.

Like?

Like, if you're even
reasonably attractive...

they talk business
to the other men...

while they try and
play footsie with you.

You're putting me on.

It's real. Believe me.

My shoes have the
scuff marks to prove it.

You don't have to do that.

Oh, it comes from being
brought up in a big family.

You know, uh,
every man for himself.

How many in your family?

Seven, besides myself
and, uh, Mom and Dad.

Eight, wow. I was an only child.

- That's another difference between us.
- Yeah.

Well, uh, I don't mind being
poor, if you don't mind being rich.

David, there is a slight
difference in our ages.

I never noticed. Still don't.

Flatterer.

I'm over 30.

Well, you're not exactly
ready for Medicare.

I'm 22.

Well, I knew there was a difference,
I just didn't think it was that much.

I never cooked
for a man your age.

Tell you what.

You don't call me "baby" and, uh,
I won't refer to you as my old lady.

Are we heading for trouble?

Tell me to back
off, I'll back off.

I'm listening.

Mr. Bradford... Yeah?

You talk too much.

Oh, uh, hi, Dave. You're early.
Only Nicholas and I are up.

That's Tommy.
Tommy, meet Jennifer.

- Hi, Tommy.
- Hi, Jennifer.

No Tusch-Bowl for me today,
Tommy. We're driving out to West Creek.

Hi, squirt.

- That's Nicholas.
- Hi, Nicholas.

Tommy, you know where
that spare picnic basket is?

It looks like a super breakfast.
- Ah, here it is.

David and I are
going cave exploring.

Have you got any advice
that might be helpful?

Watch out for worms and snakes.

- Come on, Jen.
- Makes sense.

Snakes and worms. I'll remember.

- See you later, guys.
- Bye, Dave.

Hey, that was mine.

Tommy, what do you mean you
know where David was last night?

I just know, that's all.

Do we have to guess,
or you gonna tell us?

You remember those series of lectures
they had at the college last semester?

You printed up the pamphlets
with all their names and pictures.

So what?

He was with one of them.

The one named Jennifer something.
With the brown hair and the sexy smile.

Jennifer Linden?

- Let me see.
- Tommy, let me see that.

Yeah, she's really foxy,
if you know what I mean.

Oh, you don't even
know what you mean.

Yeah. That's her.

- Hi, kids.
- Hi, Dad.

Dad, Dad...

what do you think of her?
It's David's new girlfriend.

Oh.

I, uh, didn't know he was
interested in political science.

All right, now, my point is if we wanna
make the Maxwells' party a real success...

and not too accessible on the pocketbook
then we have to get in there and pitch.

Oh, Dad, please not
Saturday night. It's a date night.

Dad, couldn't you and Mom just
take them out to dinner or something?

Good idea. We could
buy them a real nice card...

- and get some flowers.
- Yeah.

- Absolutely not.
- I think Dad's right.

The Maxwells are practically
family. I think we'll all live.

Mary, you're just saying that because
you don't have a date Saturday night.

Nancy, if I was seeing the guy you've been
going out with, I'd consider myself lucky.

- Oh, really?
- Really.

All right, that's
very funny. Ha, ha.

Okay, now, girls, please
fight on your own time.

I wanna dish out
these assignments.

Now, your mother is handling
the invitations and the caterer.

Mary, you are in
charge of decorations.

Joanie's on cleaning detail.

Susan is gift-wrapping.

And, Nancy, you make sure that the
crystal and the silver are out and clean.

I think he's forgot someone.

Who? GIRLS: You.

Me? I didn't forget
me. I'm paying the bills.

Come on, girls.
Troops dismissed.

- What's wrong with the guy I'm seeing?
- Nancy, you're so sensitive about it.

Hi, I'm home.

Hey, Tommy, I thought you
were out hanging 10 with Billy.

I was, but, uh, Billy crossed
up on a spinner and wiped out...

chipped all his front teeth.

- Oh, no, that's terrible. Is he all right?
- He is, but his father won't be.

Uh, explain that.

Well, you see, the dentist just
took Billy's braces off yesterday.

Oh, his poor father.

Dad, did you ever go out with
older women when you were young?

That is a loaded question.

Well, I mean, I thought since
you might have gone through it...

and David's going
through it now...

it was just a phase I
could look forward to.

I can hardly wait.

Could you give me some tips on
how to handle myself first time at bat?

Yeah, sure. Dig in, keep your eye
on the ball, and don't forget to bunt.

Well, I'm serious.

You... Don't be precocious
with a full mouth of food.

I swallowed.

Well, there's no
subtle way to say this...

but, uh, my birthday's
in a couple of weeks.

I was gonna forget about it.

We'll have a party.

I'll invite lots of people and
send them to the wrong address.

Week from Saturday?

Every other night I can
wring out of you before then?

Wring, friend.

Wring as much as you want.

I think I'm in love with you.

Don't say that. It's too soon.

Okay. Uh...

I think I'm madly
in like with you.

David isn't home yet.

- How do you know?
- I just called.

I'll bet he spent the
whole weekend with her.

I'd really rather not
talk about it, Elizabeth.

Why not?

Because this whole male fantasy trip
about older women is really infantile.

Here.

Hey, Nance, tell me
more about those fantasies.

He's still not home.

Oh, honey, you're worrying too
much. It's just an interim thing.

You know what? You're placing too
much emphasis on this whole thing.

I mean, men date younger women.
Some of them even marry them.

But that's different.

I mean, women's
lib may not approve...

but nature has set it up so that
men are biologically capable...

of reproduction with a younger
spouse and women aren't.

I think I'll forget you said that.
She is not Methuselah. She's not.

I just don't understand...

how a mature, healthy woman can
be attracted to someone David's age.

Men can appreciate a firm, young
bod, why should women be any different?

Of course, I just happen to
fall for weekend athletes...

with bad backs and graying
at the temple, but, uh...

Mm.

Hi. Mom around?

Where have you been? You
haven't been home for days.

I work, remember? And I moved
out so I wouldn't have to clock in.

Hey, Dave, before you go in...

- will you tell me something?
- Shoot.

Is it really true what they
say about older women?

I mean, you know...

Tommy, uh, older women are
definitely older and definitely women.

Anything else is for
Hugh Hefner to tell you.

Well, the way I see it...

state money leads to one thing.

State control.

If you want your
appendix removed...

you'll have to make an
appointment with your assemblyman.

This new malpractice
bill is really wicked, Tom.

There's some broad
in the assembly...

who actually believes that
what she's doing is right...

and if anything, her bill is worse
than the last one that bombed out.

My insurance rates have
tripled in the last year. Tripled.

I'm paying more for my
insurance than I paid for my home.

It's more than I
can stand, alone.

Nice try.

Oh, David, this is beautiful.

Where did you find it?

I got the glass in a junk
store and I made the frame.

- Aren't you clever.
- Hi, what's that?

- Isn't it pretty?
- It's a birthday present.

- Uh, anybody we should know?
- I doubt it.

Boy, living in this family is
like living in a small town.

Well, you can't blame
them for being curious.

All right. Her name is Jennifer
Linden. She's 30 years old.

She's involved in politics
and works at the capitol...

and I think she's the most
beautiful woman I've ever met.

Thanks, Mom. If you
like it, I know Jennifer will.

I think she will too. - Bye-bye.

- Oh, David.
- Yeah?

David, honey, uh, did anyone tell you
about the Maxwells' anniversary party?

No. When?

A week from Saturday night. We're
sworn to secrecy and attendance.

I'm sorry, Mom, that's Jennifer's
birthday. I already promised her.

Look, any reason I can't spend the
evening with you and with Jennifer?

- Bring her to the party?
- No. I'd really like to meet her.

You're terrific. Bye.

I tell you, this malpractice bill is
putting off a lot more than my putting.

The bill is proposed
by some woman.

Not a doctor, not even a nurse.

Probably some
closet voodoo queen.

She sounds like the
Mata Hari of Medicare.

I don't like to get
worked up over things.

Yeah, I can see that.

But I would love to get my
hands on that Linden broad.

I would love to
wring her little neck.

Linden?

- Wait a minute, is that Jennifer Linden?
- The same.

To have her on my
examination table just once...

I think I've heard that
name somewhere before.

You watch out for her, Tom.
She could be dangerous.

I don't think I should
go to this party with you.

It's family, I just
feel awkward.

Why make waves?

It's just an appearance.

Besides, you're, uh,
practically famous in my family.

Don't you mean infamous?

No, they all know you from that
lecture series last summer at the college.

Sandy, can you see Mary Ann and Chuck
anywhere? She said they might show up.

Hey, anyone ever tell you
that you look just like The Fonz?

Yeah. Everyone.

Hey, isn't that your
brother back there?

What a fox he's got.

I didn't know your brother
got it on with older chicks.

She is one hot number.

Shh.

Joan, listen, if David
shows up with Jennifer...

we're gonna lose
our best friends.

And we're gonna have
a war on our hands.

If she keeps a low profile...

- How do you think
our son is gonna react...

if I tell him to keep his girlfriend...
His woman friend in a corner?

With her mouth shut?

Now, don't worry. I mean,
we still have a few days left.

I'm sure you'll
think of something.

Me? Why me?

Well, because you were always much better
than me at thrashing things out with David.

Besides, lately he seems to be
relating better to older women.

Thank you.

Why can't we go
someplace I can afford?

Because in spite of
my love for spaghetti...

sometimes the animal in
me craves a good, thick steak.

Now, enjoy it. It's my treat.

I think my old-fashioned
upbringing just reared its ugly head.

The man's supposed to
pay. Otherwise, he's a louse.

Wrong. Now who's self-conscious?

Hey.

That's nice.

A bottle of, uh,
Châteauneuf-du-Pape.

I have to see your ID, sir.

I could've died.

The whole movie, all Sandy did
was try and play touchy-feely...

while he made dumb hints about
how much older women know.

As if he knew.

Like he was challenging me
to prove how much I knew.

You'd think they could at least
have been a little more discreet.

It's sick. ELIZABETH: Really.

Old enough to be his aunt.

I could have just died.

You know, I just don't understand
how you can blame David, uh...

for your friend Sandy Watson
being some kind of a shallow creep...

with a Casanova complex.

I agree with you, Mary.

Excuse me, didn't mean to
eavesdrop, I was just passing by.

Look, I do not condone his
love life, but it is his to live.

Well, I think his head is
screwed on backwards.

I bet she even pays
when they go out.

Elizabeth, our
brother is no gigolo.

What is a gigolo?

What could they possibly
find to talk about? Hmm?

Well, probably a lot
more interesting things

than you young
ladies are talking about.

I really don't
believe you. Really.

Products of an era of
women's lib, my own daughters.

Sitting around like a caucus
of male chauvinist pigs.

Mom, he is our brother and I just think
in our own ways, we don't want him hurt.

- That's right.
- Oh.

Sure.

Morning. Mind if I
borrow your rod and reel?

I'm, uh, taking Jen
fishing Sunday morning.

- Oh. Yeah, sure, that's fine.
- Thanks.

But, David, about Saturday...

Bye, David.

Hey, Dad, listen, I've been
thinking a lot about this David thing...

and I just might
have figured it out.

See, David is really
in love with Mother.

- What?
- Shh.

It's a classic textbook
case. An Oedipus thing.

He could've been
suppressing this for years.

But now that he's
acting out his fantasies...

Please. That's like
saying there's a leper in

the family, but not
to worry, it's curable.

That's right. It's curable.

Have a nice day, Dad.

David.

Are you sure you wanna
bring Jennifer Saturday night?

What's to be unsure of? I've
brought dates to family gatherings.

Okay. Okay, evade the issue.

Mary, I'm not evading any issue.

Look, we're not engaged,
or going steady, or, uh...

We're not even in love exactly.

It's hard finding someone you
like without everyone meddling...

and everything else this
family's famous for. You got it?

Is she nice?

She's wonderful.

I borrowed your
tackle box too, all right?

Sure, no problem.

Uh, how is your relationship
with Jennifer coming along?

Oh, man, not you too.

All I did was ask a question.

Yeah, you, and Mary a second
ago, and Tommy before that.

Why don't you just
leave me alone?

Why don't you stop
whining like Nicholas?

Stop treating me like Nicholas.

I don't live under your
roof anymore, remember?

I'm entitled to a little more
privacy and less third degree.

I'm sorry if I
offended you, son.

Yeah? Well, you've
done a good job of it.

I just don't like people
butting into my life all the time.

Full of advice, you could put
"Dear Abby" out of business.

Look, this didn't start
out as an argument,

it started out as a
pleasant chat. But if...

Yeah? Then why don't we
chat about something pleasant?

If you think that you can talk to me with
anything less than simple human respect...

we may have more of an
argument than you bargained for.

What I do is my
business, take it or leave it.

I don't need your meddling.

I don't need your
lousy gear, either.

David.

We'll talk about this later.

More bills, from
the caterer, bakery.

Why does Mrs. Bradford
have all the bills sent here?

Oh, yes, to allow a
sufficient cooling-off period...

between mail time
and getting-home time.

Clever.

Mr. Bradford, why don't
I hold your phone calls...

so that you can make the one that you've
been breaking pencils over all morning?

Well, it wasn't easy calling
you, Miss Linden. Ha, ha.

And actually, what I'm
about to say... Sit down.

Well, what I'm about to
say is even more difficult.

The point is, I wish you wouldn't come
to our house on Saturday because...

Mr. Bradford, I think the real point is you
don't want me to continue seeing David.

No, I didn't say that.

No, not in so many
words, but I can get the hint.

Do you have any
idea how difficult it is...

to find decent male
companionship my own age?

If they're not cheating
on their wives...

they're divorced with three kids on
Saturday and guilt feelings on Sunday.

Yes, I... Hi. What
would you like?

I'm not ready yet.

I'm sure...

I haven't mentioned
the mama's boys yet...

with more neuroses
than psychiatrists' bills.

Your David isn't like that.

He isn't jaded. He
isn't after something.

Well, I'm glad to
hear that, but that...

Look, I was against
coming to your party too.

David was the one
who turned me around.

He said our age difference
would be old news.

I was foolish, Mr. Bradford.

I guess I wanted to believe him.

Miss Linden, before you go
any further let me say one thing...

and I won't bother you anymore.

My reasons for disinviting you
have nothing to do with David.

They have to do with a
very dear friend of mine...

who happens to despise
your politics and...

Tom.

I didn't know you were
lunching here today.

Uh...

Looks like I should
have made a reservation.

Uh... Yes, it is
crowded here, isn't it?

How do you do?
I'm Jennifer Linden.

Dr. Maxwell.

Linden?

Excuse me, my table
seems to have been cleared.

Well, that was strange.

Yes, uh, that was the
friend I was telling you about.

I didn't know what to think.

I mean, there you
were with a woman.

I mean, she is rather attractive
despite her deplorable politics.

You had me worried, Tom.

I'm a doctor. I know
about these things.

Younger women are
nothing but trouble.

So are older women,
depending on your perspective.

Then when she
introduced herself I thought:

"You're kidding."
He's interviewing her.

My best friend, with my enemy.

And all the time, it
was just a family crisis.

It's a small world, isn't it?

And to think it could've
gotten a lot smaller.

Well, I'll race you.

You said we'd talk later.
Well, now is late enough.

You had no right to call
her like that, behind my back.

You blew it.

Look, I botched it, all right?

I'm not apologizing. If you hadn't
flown off the handle this morning...

and talked to me, the whole
thing wouldn't have happened.

Dad, do you have any
idea how she must feel now?

David, try to understand.

Max and I go back 20
years. Long, lean years.

We struggled together,
had sick kids together.

Why didn't you use that base and
deal with him instead of with Jennifer?

All right. Look, David.

Do you want me to
call her and apologize?

No. This whole
thing is my fault.

I'll take care of
the repair work.

Dad, I'm sorry
about this morning.

It's all right.

We all make mistakes, son.

All right.

If you're not going,
I'm not going, either.

This is getting to be absurd.

Look, I really
think I overreacted.

Your father was very charming.

David, it's not just the
thing with Dr. Maxwell.

I found myself trying to
justify our relationship.

I've paid my dues. I've
earned my own way in life.

I don't need to put myself
on display for approval.

Anyway...

I made another date
for Saturday night.

Not out of spite.

I just don't want to cause
you any more problems.

That's your birthday.

We're going to Chubby's.

I'll be fine. So will you.

- What's this?
- I picked it up as our contribution...

to the anniversary party.

The man at the antique
store didn't have any

idea how much it's
really worth and it...

Oh, you're right.

I thought if we gave something really
exceptional, they'd have to like me.

Look, have your parents give it.

I mean, it's really a nice gift and
it doesn't exactly fit with my decor.

You know, we were fine until everyone
else started getting into our heads.

I know.

Goodbye.

It's handsome, isn't it?

Yes. I'd say it's definitely
in the dignified category.

I gave Jennifer credit for having the good
sense that you seem to be born without.

Considering the
source, I can ignore that.

I was kind of looking
forward to meeting her.

David, when you go out, who pays?
Not that I care. I mean, I'm just curious.

You're just nosy.

What do you expect, David?

All we know about Jennifer
is what Elizabeth tells us.

She's not exactly
one of your fans lately.

Honey, um, I can't just accept this.
Couldn't we pay Jennifer something?

It's sort of her way of making
amends for, uh, being so unacceptable.

David, listen, I was very impressed
with Miss Linden. She's a nice girl.

Why don't you have her come
over when it's not so hectic?

Dad, when is it not so hectic?

Everything's pretty cool.

I'll be here for the party.

It's them. Act very casual.

Okay.

Hi. DAISY: Hi, Joan.

- Oh, is that pretty.
- Thank you. Ha, ha.

Come on, have a drink.
- Okay, sure.

Fine. I'd love it.
- How are you?

Why don't you just stop in
the living room a second?

- Okay. Everything okay?
- Yeah.

Yeah? We'll have
time for one quick...

Surprise!

- Happy anniversary! Happy anniversary!
- Here's to you, Dr. Maxwell.

Daisy, Daisy, look over
here, look over here.

- Happy anniversary.
- Oh, darn it! Come on.

- Didn't work?
- It didn't work.

Hi. WOMAN 1: Congratulations.

- Happy anniversary!
- Happy anniversary!

It's over here.

- Perfect.
- It's beautiful.

That's good. There's the knife.

"Happy 25th anniversary
to our friends, the Maxwells."

Dibs on corner piece.
- Make a wish.

One wish. Okay. Here we
go. Ready? And go. One...

- Did you make a wish?
- I made a wish. Yes.

Yeah. MAXWELL: Now
let's see this one. Oh.

- Look at that. Look at that.
- Let's see it.

Do you like it?

And I'll say it. You
shouldn't have.

Oh, I'll say it, we didn't.

I think more legislation's
decided here in this room...

than over at the
capitol building.

I see much bigger things in your
future than committee proposals, love.

If I can open a few doors...

A little mutual give and take?

Hey, lady, wanna dance?

Why don't you bug off,
kid? The lady has an escort.

Do you mind? He's
a friend of mine.

Nicholas.

Nicholas, there you are, you little
rascal. I've been looking all over for you.

Why? I've been right here.

Don't you think it's
time you hit the sack?

I'm not tired.

- It's getting late.
- For what?

For little boys to be up.

Dad, why do grown-ups
drink champagne?

Oh, that's a good question.

Because it's expensive and...
No, hey, hey, what are you doing?

Ew. It tastes creepy to me.

The bar is closed, champ.
You've had your limit.

You've gotta hit the sack.

Go to bed when you're not
tired, drink stuff that tastes creepy.

Grown-ups.

- What's the matter with half-pint?
- He's just had too much bubbly.

I think so. Dad, have you
seen David in the last half-hour?

In fact, no.

David, he's staring daggers at
us. Look, I thought we agreed...

It doesn't matter one way or the
other how we feel about each other...

or whether we see
each other again.

What matters is, if you
don't get rid of that dipstick...

and come to the party with me...

we'll have knuckled under to a double
standard neither of us believes in.

It has nothing to do
with double standards.

- Oh, no?
- No, no, it's Dr. Maxwell's feelings.

Yeah, over our feelings.

We're committed to making other
people happy, right? Not ourselves.

David, I can't just
walk out on him.

Okay, then we'll have
admitted, openly and freely...

that we've done something
to be ashamed of.

Your politics are wrong,
our relationship is wrong...

and I'm wrong asking you
to be with me. Fair enough?

Make up your mind,
lady. The iceman cometh.

David just got back and he's got
her with him. I'm gonna get some cake.

Hi.

This is the best evening
I've spent in years...

and your family, the best
friends a man could have.

Can I give you a hand?

Everything's under control.
Let's go back and party.

- Well, sure.
- Okay.

- Well, come, join the party.
- Thank you.

Dr. Maxwell, is something wrong?

Tom didn't tell me
Miss Linden would...

I mean, I didn't expect...

I don't know what to do.

I can't leave now after
you've gone to all this trouble...

but I can't go back
in there, either.

Susan.

This is Jennifer Linden.
This is my sister, Susan.

She's very attractive.

Oh, yes, but I feel there's a cloud
of war building on the horizon.

Dr. Max. Mom and Dad broke their
backs to throw this party for you guys...

because they love you both.

We all do.

And your feelings were so important
to us that we ignored David's.

She's not here to upset you.

She's here because David
wants her here with him.

But she knows that I can't
stand what she stands for.

And she's probably
just as scared meeting

you as you are to go
out there and face her.

Are you ready? What
do you say? Come on.

- Max, I don't know how to tell you this...
- Dad, it's okay. Don't worry about it.

- Dr. Maxwell, Jennifer Linden.
- Yes, we've met once, briefly.

Hi.

Happy anniversary, doctor,
to you and your lovely wife.

Thank you. It is a
happy anniversary.

Jennifer picked out the statue.
- Oh.

No lobbying intended, I'm sure.

Maybe just a little bit.

You know, you two
should get together.

David tells me
you're an artist...

and, uh, aren't you
and Mrs. Maxwell...

co-sponsoring a big
charity auction next month?

So you're an artist.

It's just a hobby. Just a
little painting and sculpting.

- Lovely.
- I enjoy it.

- Would you like a little, uh, champagne?
- Thank you.

- Happy anniversary.
- Thank you.

- Truce?
- Yes. truce.

It's been very nice.
It was just a surprise.

- Was it a surprise?

- Hi.
- Hey.

For what it's worth, I
know how you must feel.

I mean, I guess it's terrific having
a woman like that on your arm.

Well, it might have been
that at first. The status thing.

Now, it's just her.

It's funny how things evolve.

First, she was the older
woman, then the younger woman.

Now, she just looks
like one of the gang.

Yeah. JENNIFER: Hey.

What happened to the
champagne? It's dry as a desert.

- I'll bring it in a minute.
- Okay.

Sandy Watson was right.

She is one hot number.