Drop Dead Diva (2009–2014): Season 5, Episode 9 - Trust Me - full transcript

See that aspiring model there?

That's me... Deb...
until the day I died.

I thought I'd go straight to heaven,

but there was a bit of a mix-up,

and I woke up in someone else's body.

So now I'm Jane,

a super-busy lawyer
with my very own assistant.

I got a new life, a new wardrobe,

and the only people who really
know what's going on with me

are my girlfriend Stacy
and my guardian angel, Paul.

I used to think everything
happened for a reason.



Whoo!

Now, I sure hope I was right.

Drop Dead Diva 5x09 - Trust Me
Original air date October 6, 2013

My new partner, your new boss.

Previously on Drop Dead Diva...

This is not good.

If you two want to kiss each other,

have at it.

I know it's not easy to forgive me...

We'll never get back the way we were.

Grayson. Oh, my God. This is amazing.

It's for you.

Look me in the eye
and tell me this isn't real.

You deserve someone better than me.



I'm trying to get pregnant,

and I'm looking for a sperm donor.

Wow, I never realized how tall he was.

- I want your sperm.
- Wow.

Yeah, I know.

- How dare you?
- How dare you?

Don't you think it's gonna be
a little weird

when Owen and I are married
and you're raising his child?

What?

This is about Grayson.

It's always been about Grayson.

I love him, Teri.

Why are you telling me and not him?

You need to go to him.

I'm really gonna do this.

- Good night.
- Good night, Jane.

See you tomorrow.

Oh! Hold the elevator, please!

Oh, thank you, Grayson.

- Nicole.
- No problem.

So, do you guys have plans tonight?

Oh, there is
a great documentary on PBS...

"The history of bangs."

So... whoa!

Hey! Whoa!

Hello! Grayson?

Yeah, hey, this is workplace elevator.

Grayson! Grayson!

Hi, I am right here!

Wow. This is... this is unbelievable.

Okay. Okay. It's fine.

Okay, it's not fine.

Grayson!

- Oh, my God!
- Jane.

Jane!

Wake up, sweetie.

I brought your dress for the benefit.

Oh, thank you.

I was having another
Grayson-and-Nicole sex dream.

The one where you're in court?

This time, the elevator.

Ever since I saw them kissing,
it's all I can think about.

I can't believe I was gonna
tell him I loved him

and now he's seeing someone else,

who works right outside my office.

Maybe the kiss was a harmless peck,

like when I kiss my aunt Charleen.

Well, unless you kiss her with
your tongue, it's not the same.

And I think they're doing
that "secret dating" thing

which makes it even worse.

I'm sorry, sweetie.

How are you feeling?

Two more days until I can take
the pregnancy test.

The suspense is killing me.

Now, if you'll excuse me,
Owen left a message

and said he needed to speak
with me as soon as possible.

Stupid, stupid thing.

Owen.

Hey.

Come here. Let me help you.

Oh, good.

It's just like tying your shoe,
only around your neck.

There you go.

Now you look like one of those
cute boys from one direction

when they try to look like
Justin Timberlake.

Thank you, I think.

- So, you wanted to talk with me?
- Yeah.

Uh, Stacy,
I've been giving a lot thought

to our donor agreement.

I've drawn up an amendment
that better defines

the relationship
I'd like to have with the child.

But please, before you sign it,
discuss it with an attorney.

Okay.

Jane, I really admire you for
volunteering at shelter house.

It's an amazing organization.

I just give free legal advice.

The woman to admire is Violet Harwood.

She's right over there.

The way I see it,
if you're a trust-fund baby,

you either become Paris Hilton
and make a sex tape

or you become Violet Harwood.

She turned her Beverly Hills mansion

into a safe house for abused women.

Wow. Nicole cleans up nice.

Why?

Hey, everyone. I'm sorry I'm late.

Kim made me drop off diapers
at her house.

You need to learn how to say "no."

Okay. Now that we're all here,
I have an announcement.

Even though we all know
the firm is in trouble,

tonight we act like nothing is wrong.

So you want us to put on
our happy faces.

This event is loaded
with high-powered lawyers.

If they detect trouble,
they'll come after our clients.

Is that a bad thing?

I mean, if Parker's gonna sell,

why are we trying to save our clients?

Because, Grayson, we're not giving up.

Okay. What's the plan?

Right now the plan is to have
a good time even if it kills us.

Excuse me.

What are you doing here?

Thought I'd schmooze a bit.

There are some big names here
at this party

who might be interested in
bidding on Harrison & Parker.

But just so you know,
I'm rooting for you.

Okay, I don't have $4 million
to buy out Parker.

Hmm. That's a shame. Oh, champagne.

Mmm. Pigs in a blanket are awesome.

Food of the gods.

If I haven't already said it,
you look hot.

Grayson.

I hate to spoil a party with shoptalk,

but I need your help.

Judge Sanders, anything I can do.

I've got a criminal case.

Public defender's had a health scare.

I'd like you to step in.

The firm's been pulling back on pro bono

while Kim Kaswell's on maternity leave.

You're an officer of the court.
You're going to represent him.

Then I have a new client.

He's in lock-up
and expecting you tonight.

You should probably head on over.

With pleasure, Your Honor.

Jane Bingum, we finally meet.

I'm Lester Tuttle.

You're the one who's trying to
break up the firm.

I thought you'd be greener,
you know, more like the grinch.

- Actually, Jay Parker is.
- Greener?

- Trying to sell the firm.
- Ah.

- I'm just the middleman.
- Mm.

And I must say, with your track record,

you've certainly enhanced
the firm's value.

I'm surprised you haven't been
named a partner.

Well, ah...

...there are a lot of factors
that go into that.

If Harrison & Parker is kaput,

I'm sure you'll have no problem
getting another job...

Well, thank you.

...especially since you're
no longer preoccupied.

"Preoccupied"?

First, you were preoccupied
getting married,

and now you're preoccupied
not getting married.

Whoa. That's none of your business.

It's all my business.

I value the firm by valuing the assets,

and you are a great big asset.

Seriously, I'm surprised
you didn't demand

to be named partner a long time ago.

Jane.

- Excuse me.
- Sure.

- Hi, Violet.
- You look beautiful.

- Oh, thank you. So do you.
- Thanks.

Quite a turnout...
that means lots of donations.

Well, that's some good news.

Why? Is everything okay?

I have to appear in front of

the Beverly Hills zoning board
tomorrow morning.

- Why?
- My neighbors.

They've hired a lawyer.

They're complaining about the house.

They say that there's excess noise,

too many cars on the street,

women coming and going at all hours.

Are their complaints valid?

- Not even close.
- Okay.

No, they want to shut us down.

They feel like a house for abused women

is hurting their Beverly Hills
property values.

So the complaints are just a pretext.

I have 10 women with nowhere to go.

They depend on me.

Violet, why didn't you tell me
about this earlier?

The hearing just got expedited.

Okay, you know what?
I'm gonna say good night,

go and bone up on those zoning
laws for tomorrow's hearing.

- Thank you.
- Yes.

Now mix, mingle, and make lots of money.

I'll see you in the morning.

Oh! Hold the elevator, please!

Oh, thank you, Grayson.

No problem.

Hey.

What are you doing here?

It's, uh... God, it's after midnight.

I am studying Beverly Hills zoning law.

- What about you?
- Hmm.

- Whoa. Is that scotch?
- Mm-hmm.

You hate scotch.

Yeah, well,
hoping for a little inspiration.

You're worried about the firm.

I don't have a plan.

If the firm gets sold,

people are gonna get fired,
and it's my fault.

Your fault?

When I took this job,
I should have insisted

that Parker give up his right to sell.

But I took him at his word that
he wanted the place to continue.

I mean, he said the firm
was like family and,

after being on my own for so many years,

I guess... I liked the sound of it.

And, Jane, even though
I know we're not a couple,

I'd be lying if I said
I didn't like working together,

seeing you every day.

Parker put a deadline on
the sale... a week from today.

What? That's crazy.

Yeah.

And I can't see a way out.

Anyway...

I should get back
to my office and sleep this off.

- Owen.
- Yeah?

I like seeing you every day, too.

Kieran Dinescu,

I'm Grayson Kent, your new lawyer.

All right, the criminal complaint says

you were unruly on a commercial airplane

and were removed by a federal marshal.

I was sitting in the window seat,

and the flight attendant
asked me to pull up the shade.

I refused, and when she asked me why,

I told her it was
because I am a vampire.

I am a vampire!

Sunlight is deadly.

That's why I needed the shade down.

Okay.

It says you hissed
at a flight attendant?

That's what vampires do
when we're anxious.

When I told her I was a vampire,

the lady in front of me
started freaking out.

And pretty soon
everybody started looking at me.

I got nervous, so I hissed some more.

Come on, dude.
I'm your lawyer. Quit the act.

- It's not an act.
- All right.

You're being charged with
interfering with a flight crew.

That's 10 to 20 years in prison.

Calm down.

You don't have a record,

so we can probably chalk this up
to a misunderstanding.

I'll get you out on bail.

We'll head to court in the morning.

Do I have to go to court in the daytime?

In the sunlight?

How about I file a motion to
move your trial to night court?

Thank you.

Oh! Finally! You're home.

Okay. Two quarts of fudge ripple.

Honey, did you watch
"Marley & me" again?

- No, I am freaking out!
- Okay. Oh.

Owen gave me this amendment
to our sperm-donor agreement.

He said I should show it to a lawyer.

Okay. Oh.

Owen doesn't want you
to disclose his identity

to your child until he or she turns 16.

Yeah, and I'm okay with Owen
not wanting any involvement,

but if my child wants to know
their father's identity,

I want to be able to share it.

- Sweetie...
- No more secrets.

I have kept your secret,
and it has been really tough.

I know. I know.

The problem is you told Owen

you only wanted his genetic material,

so you might have to honor
his request, but...

Ah! There's a "but."
I knew you would find a "but."

But if you don't like this amendment,

then the person you
should be talking to isn't me.

It's Owen.

Commissioner, all of these women

escaped dire circumstances

to start a new life at shelter house.

If you shut us down, you won't
just be closing a building.

You will be slamming a door

in the face of women
who desperately need help.

Thank you, Ms. Bingum.

Mr. Hart.

The neighbors appreciate
Ms. Harwood's charity work.

But she is running a charity

and is therefore subject
to stricter zoning ordinances.

I agree.

I've submitted a list of violations,

which includes a lack of handicap ramp,

soundproofing, adequate fencing.

Frankly, we're just concerned
that it's potentially harmful

for the residents of shelter house.

- Oh, please!
- Violet, it's okay.

We request that shelter house

be closed down effective immediately.

These violations are a pretext.

Shelter house is not
a commercial establishment.

Ms. Harwood simply opened
her home to women in need.

Well, pretext or not,

the regulations
still have to be followed.

We're willing to make
the necessary changes.

We just need a little time.

- You have 30 days.
- Thank you.

Okay, with the right contractor,
we can make that deadline.

I'm sure of it.

I can't afford those fixes.

Last night's event made just
enough to keep the lights on.

Uh, I don't mean to be rude,
but aren't you really rich?

You're the heir to a giant fortune.

My money is in a trust
that's controlled by my brother.

I can't touch it without his consent.

But you're a responsible adult.

Yes, but I was a reckless teenager

with a serious drug problem when
my parents created that trust.

My brother was the responsible one.

He was in law school,
newly married, the golden child.

But you've turned your life around.

Surely, your brother can
appreciate the work you do.

The last few times I've asked
for money for shelter house,

he's refused me.

Well, we're gonna ask him again.

And this time, we won't let him say no.

Teri, I need you to file a motion.

- For the vampire case?
- How did you know?

Bloggers are all over it.

They're calling Kieran
the "vampire who couldn't fly,"

and you're his fancy new lawyer.

So tell me everything.

Does he sleep hanging
upside down or in a coffin?

Is he kind of like a sparkly
vampire like "Twilight"

or a spooky nutjob like "Dark Shadows?"

Kieran's just an odd kid
looking for attention.

Here. File this motion to
move his trial to night court.

He doesn't want to go out
in the sunlight.

Of course not. His skin would burn.

You pulled me out of work to
ask for money from the trust?

It's important, Bill.

Request denied.

You've already sunk $500,000
into your... hobby.

Hobby? Mr. Harwood,
your sister is a saint.

No offense, Ms. Bingum.
This is a family matter.

I'm not gonna piss away my family legacy

on a bunch of freeloaders.

You know, I reviewed
your trust expenditures,

and recently, you spent $56,000

on a first-class family vacation
to the Bahamas.

Now, that sounds like "pissing" to me.

I'm the trustee.

I control the expenses... end of story.

Bill, mom and dad wouldn't have
given you all the control

- if they could see me today.
- You don't know that.

Do you see, Jane?

Every bit of my life
is controlled by this trust,

even this antique watch from our mother.

It's worth $20,000,

which could help pay
for the work at shelter house,

but I can't sell it because,
under the trust,

I am bound to pass it down
to my firstborn daughter

on her 18th birthday.

I don't have a daughter.
I can't even have children.

The family put the clause
in the trust because they were

afraid you were gonna sell
family heirlooms to buy drugs.

I haven't done drugs in 20 years!

Okay, if you won't release the money,

we will have a judge compel you to.

I've already filed for

an emergency hearing for this afternoon.

Terrific. See you in court.

Mr. Kent, what's it like
representing a vampire?

No comment.

What are your chances in court?

Do you think Kieran's
gonna take the stand?

I don't discuss legal strategy.

Tell me this.
Has he tried to suck your blood?

What? That's ridiculous.

There he is!

Kieran! Kieran!

Billy Tyner. Channel 3 news.

As a vampire,

what are your biggest concerns
heading into trial?

What are you doing? What was that?

All right. That's enough.
We're due in court. Let's go.

You promised me night court.

The judge denied my request.
I'll get the blinds drawn.

Kieran, I want you to know

that the vampire community supports you.

- You're the fancy new lawyer?
- I guess.

Here's a petition signed by
over 50 local vampires.

Can you please give it to the judge

and let them that we demand
Kieran's charges be dropped?

Court doesn't really work
that way, but thank you.

Your Honor, Mr. Harwood cannot

deny money to Violet
for arbitrary reasons.

My parents, the grantors of the trust,

wanted the money protected.

And while that may have been necessary

when the trust was established,

it's important to look at Violet now...

a responsible, sober,
and glamorous adult.

Even so, my parents
never intended the money

to be spent on upgrading
a homeless shelter.

Ms. Bingum?

Um... yes.

The thing is the terms
of the trust must evolve

with the maturation of the beneficiary.

Hold on.

Ms. Bingum just argued that "the
terms of the trust must evolve."

She's no longer challenging me,
the trustee.

Ms. Bingum is now challenging
the trust itself,

and that is a violation of
the trust's in terrorem clause.

- What?
- Paragraph 37, subsection "B."

"Any challenge to the trust
by a beneficiary"

"or someone acting on her behalf
causes the beneficiary to lose"

"all benefit granted by said trust."

Ms. Bingum, Mr. Harwood is correct.

Did you not see the clause?

Well, I... I thought the fact pattern

would distinguish this case.

There are no fact patterns
that void an in terrorem clause.

I'm sorry,
but challenging the trust means

that Ms. Harwood is
no longer a beneficiary.

Case dismissed.

Uh, what just happened?

I'm so sorry, Violet. I think I just...

I just lost your inheritance.

You are greedy, selfish,
and narrow-minded.

I am embarrassed
that you are my brother.

Violet, we need to go.

Do you think mom and dad would approve

of how you spend their money? Huh?

Everybody knows about
the million-dollar condo

you bought your mistress.

If that's how you want to play, fine.

You're not just cut off.

I'm going after you under
the trust's clawback provisions.

- What are you talking about?
- You'll have to pay back

every dime you've ever received
from the trust.

Okay, this is not over.
We will file an appeal.

Please don't, Jane.
You've done enough already.

Jane!

You missed a standard
in terrorem clause?

That's basic trusts and estate law!

I was hoping the judge would understand

that I was trying to help
a wronged client.

You thought a sitting judge
would ignore the law

because you were doing the right thing?

Okay, when you say it like that
it makes me sound like...

- Violet.
- Stop.

My whole life is shelter house,

and I am not about to sell it
because of your incompetence.

Listen, I am... I am so sorry,

and I will figure out
a way to undo this.

No, I just spoke with a good lawyer,

who said that I can sue you
and this firm for malpractice.

- She's filing right now.
- What's going on here?

Butt out, Tuttle.

Every penny that I owe the trust...

and that's around $5 million...
I will get from this firm.

Violet, please, there's got to
be something we can work out.

We can work something out... in court.

Owen, it's fine.
We have malpractice insurance.

It's capped at a million,
which means that the partners

could be on the hook for the remainder.

- Butt out, Tuttle.
- Why are you even still here?

As Parker's proxy,
I can roam these halls freely.

Jane, you do realize that if we lose,

the remaining money comes out
of the partners' pockets?

Parker is not gonna be happy about this.

Butt out, Tuttle!

Owen, I... I messed up,
but everything is gonna be okay.

Trust me.

Oh! Oh, you want me to trust you?

If Kim were here,
you'd already be fired.

I will fix this.

And when I do,
I want you to make me a partner.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

You need to have your head examined.

Your mistake could bankrupt me.

I am saying, when I can fix my mistake.

Now, I'm gonna go prep my case.

Oh, and you're gonna need to
represent me.

So, Ms. Taylor,
you were the flight attendant

that had Mr. Dinescu
removed from the plane.

You must have felt that he was a threat?

Yes. He hissed at me.

So, just to be clear,

you felt that he was a threat
to passenger safety?

Yes.

I noticed people staring at him
when he boarded the plane.

And, frankly, he weirded me out.

Nothing further, Your Honor.

So, Ms. Taylor,

you thought Kieran
was going to bite someone?

He was pale, he wore a cloak
and a hood up over his head,

and he had his arms crossed
across his chest

like he was laying in a coffin, and...

So you didn't like the way he looked?

Correct.

Do you always remove passengers

when you don't like their clothing?

Are you the fashion police?

He said he was a friggin' vampire.

Did he threaten you or a passenger?

- No.
- Did he have a weapon?

No.

A flight attendant recently
removed a passenger for wearing

a "princess bride" T-shirt that read

"My name is Inigo Montoya."

"You killed my father. Prepare to die."

Would you call that a threat?

I'm not sure.

In that case, the court ruled

the flight attendant overstepped
her authority.

Now, it's important to be vigilant

but not paranoid or vindictive.

I think it's pretty clear
the charges against

Kieran Dinescu should be dropped.

- Oh, Your Honor...
- No, I agree with Mr. Kent.

We're done here.
Mr. Dinescu, you're free to go.

Congratulations.

What? Vampires don't smile
when they get good news?

I just got a text from my boss
at the zoo.

I've been fired.

He saw me on the news and told
me not to come back to work.

- I'm sorry.
- I loved that job.

Is there anything you can do to help?

California allows at-will employees

to be fired without cause.

How about I call your boss?

See if I can work this out.

Ms. Bingum, do you consider
yourself a good lawyer?

I do.

You prepare extensively
before you go into court?

- I try to, yes.
- You try to?

So, sometimes you waltz
into court unprepared?

No, of course not.

But you missed
a standard in terrorem clause.

Could it be that maybe you
didn't give my client's case

enough prep time
because you were distracted?

I'm not sure what you mean.

It's common knowledge around town

that Harrison & Parker
is fighting for its life.

I'd find that distracting.

Well, it is upsetting.

I've given my whole life to H&P.

You know, and the people are...

They're like my family.

And the whole place could
just be gone within a week.

That's a lot of pressure on me.

What about your home life?
Any distractions there?

Nothing stands out.

I don't believe you.

Okay.

Okay. Uh, my home life. Let's see.

Oh, well, my best friend

is being inseminated by my ex-fiancé,

who is also my boss and my lawyer

for the purposes of this case.

And while I am totally
supportive of that arrangement,

it...

I guess it does affect me in
ways that I couldn't... foresee.

So, maybe you're a little bit right.

My life is changing
on all fronts, and...

...I have no control over any of it.

So if you're asking me
if I was distracted...

...Yes, ma'am.

I was distracted.

And I know that
that's why you're suing me.

And I'm so sorry. I am sorry.

Can I go now?

I'm ordering a recess.

Ms. Bingum, I suggest you get some rest.

Hey, boss. I brought you
a magnetic bracelet.

It's supposed to calm you down
from traumatic events

like car accidents
or melting down on the stand.

It wasn't that bad.

I got e-mails from the bailiff
and the coffee-cart guy.

They're concerned.

Is that how you practice law here?

Behaving like a complete lunatic?

Violet's lawyer was really coming at me.

And it didn't help to see
your smug face in the gallery.

You were completely unprofessional.

I am not going to let
a complete stranger berate me.

I'm gonna go get some air.

Excuse me.

You are a mean, mean man.

And if you expect me to validate
your parking now,

you are out of luck.

Excuse me.

Grayson.

Kieran called.
Did you speak to his boss?

Yes, I did.

The zoo fired him because
parents heard about the "freak"

who worked
in the nighttime animal exhibit.

Kieran's not getting his job back

till he stops with the vampire nonsense.

You need to see this.
I found it on YouTube.

Kieran made it a few years ago.

I get it.

I don't play sports
or have a lot of friends.

I'm an easy target,

but I don't know how much more
I can take, so please just stop.

Stop getting in my face.
Stop pushing me around.

Just...

Would it make you happy
if I just went away... forever?

He sounds like
he was going to kill himself.

But instead he pretended to be
a vampire to protect himself.

Maybe he thought if people
were freaked out by him,

they'd leave him alone.

And it worked.

He has no friends,
doesn't talk to his family.

Kid's a total loner.

I hate bullies.

But you know who pisses me off
even more?

The kids who watch and do nothing.

Teri, call the court clerk and
get us on the docket A.S.A.P.

I thought you said we didn't have
a case for wrongful termination?

I don't think we do.

But a kid like Kieran needs to see

that other people will fight for him.

Your Honor, I'm bringing
an action against the zoo

for wrongful termination

under the California Fair
Employment and Housing Act.

Kieran Dinescu was fired
because he is a vampire.

You're contending
that vampires are a race?

If a native American Irishman
had a baby with an Asian-latina,

what race would that child be?

The truth is, it doesn't matter.

What matters is that child
deserves protection.

The distinctions of race exist
to protect people

who experience the oppression
of being a minority.

Vampires are a minority.

And Kieran was discriminated against

because of who he is perceived to be.

Mr. Kent, are you asking

that vampires be considered
a protected class?

Yes, absolutely.

You know what, Your Honor, for
the purpose of this litigation,

we will stipulate that vampires
are a protected class.

We ask only for a brief recess
to rethink our argument.

Well, this ought to be something.

Hey.

- Hey.
- Do you have a second?

Of course. Please, sit down.

So, I'm a little confused
about this amendment.

If my child wants to know your identity,

why would you want to hide it?

Stacy, someday I want to have
a family of my own.

If your child knows who I am,
it could complicate things.

But what if he or she

is curious about where they came from?

You know, I want to be able to tell them

that they've got a really awesome dad.

"Dad."

See, you said "dad."

But you didn't get a dad.
You got a sperm donor.

That's what you asked for.

I wrote up the amendment because

I... I sensed you might be looking
for more.

Right. Okay. Um... okay.

I'm gonna go home and sign the amendment

and then I'll bring it back.

Mr. Dinescu, vampires are
sensitive to garlic, correct?

If garlic's anywhere near me,
I become violently ill.

Would you mind reaching
under your chair?

What was that?

Garlic.

And how are you feeling?

Objection. Badgering.

Your Honor, since we stipulated

that vampires are a protected class

for the purposes of this hearing,

I'm trying to establish whether or not

Mr. Dinescu
is a member of the vampire race.

Overruled. Proceed.

Vampires don't age, correct?

You remain the age you were
when you became a vampire.

And when did you become a vampire?

I was turned about five years ago.

I'd like to enter
into evidence exhibit "F,"

a photo of Kieran Dinescu
when he was 15.

Do you think you look older today?

I'm not sure.

Let's talk about blood,
which you need to survive.

What if I told you
that I am a willing victim?

So, go ahead, express
some fangs, and bite my neck.

- Objection. Badgering.
- Agreed.

Pull it back, counselor.

Your Honor, vampires are also
unable to be seen in mirrors.

Let's see if this holds true
for Mr. Dinescu.

Okay, that's enough.

Do you see your reflection?

I said enough!

Mr. Kent, stay calm.

Obviously, Kieran is not a vampire.

He's just a confused young man.

Kieran.

Kieran!

Recess, Your Honor?

Granted.

- Kieran!
- Leave me alone.

Look, that lawyer had no right
to harass you like that.

- I can deal with it.
- I want to help you.

Why?!

Because you want to feel better
about yourself?

What's that supposed to mean?

Has anyone ever made you feel
like a loser?

You were probably a jock.

You probably got straight A's
and dated a cheerleader.

Kieran, wait.

Look, I can't pretend to know
what you've been through,

but I know you don't have to be alone.

All these people came to cheer you on.

And as a former jock,

I can tell you
it feels good to have fans.

And I'm gonna keep fighting
to get you your job back.

I don't think your vampire-race
argument's gonna work.

Well, I'm like a vampire.

Till you shoot me with
a silver bullet, I keep going.

That's a werewolf, but nice try.

I'm putting you back on the stand.

I'm gonna ask the questions.

You're gonna answer "yes" or "no."

No colorful commentary.

I will be fine. Calm and professional.

Pardon the interruption.

Tuttle, what do you want?

Parker has made a decision
about his future with H&P.

- Yes, we're aware he's selling.
- That's old news.

Pursuant to paragraph 12, subsection 4

of the firm's partnership agreement,

a founding member has the right
to surrender his stake

if he is not currently working
at the firm.

So now that we're losing
a malpractice case,

Parker wants to bail before the verdict

and leave Kim and I to pay the damages.

Hey, no one said we were gonna lose.

Based on my assessment,
you're going to lose.

Hence, Parker's signed notice
of surrender, dated today.

Parker's no longer a partner?

That's right. He's cutting his losses.

Adieu, adios, ta-ta.

Oh, and best of luck.
You're going to need it.

So without Parker, we should
discuss my partnership.

Partner of what?
There's not gonna be a firm.

Owen, like I said,
I am going to fix this,

and then I'm gonna redecorate
that lobby.

- I'm thinking leather sofas.
- You know what?

Fine. Fine.

If you can find a way
to get us out of this mess,

forget partner. I'll make you queen.

I have always wanted to be royalty.

Okay, we're due back in court, but first
I want to chitchat with that judge.

What are you talking about?

Owen, you need to trust me.

Let me get this straight, Ms. Bingum.

You called us here to argue
on behalf of Violet Harwood,

who is currently suing you
for malpractice?

Right. That's right.

In advocating for Violet,
my former client,

I believe that
the malpractice case against me

will be dismissed.

- Do you know what this is about?
- No, Your Honor.

At this point, my client has gone rogue.

And are you feeling okay, Ms. Bingum?

Oh, never better.

Violet, please tell the judge
about your watch.

Okay.

Um, my mother left this to me
in the trust

with instructions to pass it on
to my firstborn daughter

on her 18th birthday,

and then to her daughter
on her 18th birthday,

and so on down the line.

Kind of sounds like
a dead hand clause to me.

What's going on here?

You know, a dead hand clause

prevents dead people
from exercising control

from the grave,
beyond a single generation.

So, for example,
your parents cannot require you

to give your watch
to your firstborn daughter...

someone who did not exist
when they died.

And since such a clause exists,
the whole trust is invalid.

You're trying to invalidate
the entire trust

because of a technicality?

Why not?

We already know you're a big fan
of technicalities.

And what's good for the goose
is good for the gander.

And I say we cook this goose.

Your Honor, this is crazy.

Mr. Harwood, Ms. Bingum is correct.

The underlying assets shall be
distributed 50/50

between the two beneficiaries,
you and your sister.

More than enough to fix shelter house.

I assume you want to drop
the malpractice suit

- against Ms. Bingum and her firm?
- Absolutely.

So ordered. We are done here.

I should have known you were too smart

- to mess up an in terrorem.
- I don't know what you mean.

Oh, come on.
You planned the whole thing out.

- And Violet was in on it.
- Shh!

I told you to trust me.

I told you I would fix it.

You knew you could challenge
the dead hand clause.

You knew it. You had
the whole thing mapped out.

Well, it wasn't easy.
I had to wait till Tuttle

handed over Parker's right of surrender.

But now that Parker's
no longer a partner,

you don't have to buy him out.

Jane, that breakdown on the stand,

that was... really convincing.

Acting.

Nice job... partner.

Thanks for coming in.
It's good to see you again.

She was number one on the petition.

I called her.

Good.

So, I was looking at your files
from the zoo,

and I noticed
you worked 60 hours a week,

but you never got healthcare
per the employment manual.

Now, that's a policy violation,

so we might be able to compel
your boss to rehire you.

No.

I mean, no, thank you.

That's very nice of you,
but you can stop fighting.

Seriously, I want to help.

I got a better job.

A guy on the petition
owns a veterinary clinic,

and he needed help
on the graveyard shift.

Twice my hourly rate,
plus all the blood I can drink.

Kidding.

She says I need to lighten up.

Well, I'm happy for you.

Both of you.

You realize when Parker finds out

we didn't lose the malpractice,
he's gonna go ballistic.

That's another reason
I'm glad he's in Canada.

Yeah.

Jane, what you said on the stand,

about this place feeling like family...

Again, I was acting.

Yeah. Yeah.

Still, Parker turned his back
on the firm.

His departure had to hurt.

As far as I'm concerned,
you stuck it to him.

Oh, after you.

- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

Whoo!

- What is happening?
- I called ahead.

Everyone, here's to

the second-best-dressed woman
at this firm,

a toast to my boss, Jane Bingum,
our newest partner.

Hear, hear!

Thank you.

Play that funky music, white boy.

Um, I'll be right back.

- Partner!
- Yes.

I'm so proud of you!

Thank you.

And I have some big news, too.

- What?
- I'm pregnant.

- You are?
- Mm-hmm.

You are. That's amazing!

Thank you. I have never been happier.

Am I glowing yet?

I think you are.

Wait. What about Owen's amendment?

I signed it.

I don't want to bring my child
into the world

with any kind of conflicts.

You're doing what's best for your baby.

All right, so, I'm gonna go tell Owen

the big news and bring him
the signed document.

- Okay.
- Okay.

I will see you at home, aunt Jane.

I'm gonna be aunt Jane.

- Wow!
- Hey.

- Congratulations, partner.
- Oh, thank you.

Well, and I'm sure you'll make
partner yourself in no time.

Uh, so, this isn't easy for me
to say to you.

But now that you're a partner,

you need to know, per the firm's policy.

Okay, what's going on?

I'm dating Nicole.

Oh! Oh!

I see.

And per the firm's policy,
you needed to tell me that.

Yes.

I mean, you know I had feelings for you,

but how much rejection
can a guy take, right?

Right. Of course.

Well, I...

I hope that you and Nicole
will... will be...

Uh, I'm sorry. Excuse me.

Hey. What's up?

Everyone is in there partying,
and you're...

Are you crying?

Maybe just a little.

But you just made partner.

Yes.

And that is something
the old Jane would have...

would have really been excited about.

And I am proud, too. I am. It's just...

It's just my life isn't
just about my job.

This is about Grayson.

I do not want to talk
about Grayson with you.

You just want to keep us apart.

Not true. I want you to be happy.

Don't the rules say that
I shouldn't be with Grayson

because he was my soul mate

and now I'm Jane and
I should move on with this life?

I guess.

Yeah, and won't you get in trouble

if I don't follow the rules?

Maybe. I don't know.

Look, Jane.
I don't care about the rules.

Life is short.

And if you don't like the rules,
then let's make new ones.

You're either a really
bad guardian angel or...

Or... a really good friend?

Hey. That is your party in there.

Now, I say... I say we go celebrate

a former model who just made partner.

That doesn't happen every day.

Okay.

Thank you, Paul.

Yeah.

There you are, Jane.

Here you go, all signed,
and I need to tell you...

Bup, bup.

I've been thinking
about our conversation.

And, as the child's mother,

I have to respect that
you didn't want to sign

that amendment because you didn't think

it was in the best interest
of the child.

That's true, but, see, I...

I'm still not sure how involved
I want to be with the baby.

But...

If you trust me enough to use my sperm,

then I have to trust
that we're gonna be able to

figure out a way to talk
to the kid about who I am, so...

Oh! Ha!

- Okay.
- Okay.

Owen, I'm pregnant.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God!

Yeah, I took the test an hour ago.

That's fantastic, Stacy.
Congratulations.