Doom Patrol (2019–…): Season 1, Episode 6 - Doom Patrol Patrol - full transcript

Previously on
Doom Patrol...

Who wants pancakes?

Cliff!

You told me
my daughter was dead!

- I was trying to protect you.
- By lying?

Paraguay was an eye-opener.
All that carnage.

Cliff,
you're a fucking monster.

It's not your fault, Elliot.

You should've let me die.

I went with my gut,
and my gut says you deserve a break.

- Shit! Shit.
- What is that?



Don't! No, it's an
emergency trigger!

- No, no, no. Don't!
- What?

- If you press it, my dad...
- It'll send an SOS.

This is for your own good.

Grid. Stop, no.

I have one more
task for you.

What the fuck
is the Doom Patrol?

Shit.

Ms. Farr, Mr. Bloom
will see you now.

That only took
an hour and a half.

There she is.

Come here, gorgeous.

Oh. What can my girl get you?
Coffee? Tea?

- Anything at all?
- I'm fine, Sydney. Thank you.



That's all, hon.

Sit.

So, how are you, kiddo?

I'm hungry, Syd.

I want the love-interest role
in your new wrestling picture.

You know I'd be perfect for it.

Boy, you just get right to it,
don't you?

Some girls may need to play
little games. I'm a woman.

I know what I want,
and I'm not afraid to say it.

So I've heard.

Scoop around town is
you're nothing but trouble.

Moody, abusive,

and there's not a makeup girl
in the burg who'll touch you.

Besides, the director has
his heart set on Mary Lacy.

Moon-eyed Mary? Please.

You need a hit bad, Syd,
and I need a job.

So what do you say
we help each other out, hmm?

You wanna talk turkey?

You don't need help.

What you need is a miracle.

Because the name "Rita Farr" hasn't
put a butt in the seat in a dog's age.

Concrete shines brighter
than your star...

My sweet.

Hmm.

Atta girl.

Show me how hungry you are.

Hmm.

Syd?

Syd?

Uh...

Mr. Bloom?

The bastard had a heart attack.

You were never here.

Get it? Go.

I don't think he's coming back.

"This user's profile
is only viewable by friends."

What about her fucking father?

Jane?

I made you some, "We kicked
the apocalypse's ass" sandwiches.

Hi.

I was wondering, if you're
not busy or anything...

I'm trying to look at my kid's
online thing, and...

I could use some help.

I made 'em just the way
Baby Doll likes...

Does that mean you're still
mad at me?

Hello?

I'm not cleaning this shit up.

Fine, I'll do it!

But just this fucking once.
You hear me, Jane?

Jane!

Fuck!

No!

No! N-O. N-O.
I don't want you to go.

It's only for
a few days, Baby Doll.

It's seven.

Seven is a whole week!

You'll miss pancake day.

But what if...

I promise to have pancakes
at 9:00 a.m. tomorrow,

and think of you.

And you have pancakes
at the same time

and think of me, hmm?

No.

No, you're trying to trick me.

It won't be the same.

You're telling me.

For once, I'm going
to be able to enjoy my breakfast without

a certain little piggy...

Snarfing up all the syrup.

Mmm?

But what if you start liking
your new friends more than you like me?

That's impossible.

For one thing, they have
a hopelessly silly name.

"The Doom Patrol."

I mean, really. Come on.

And for another,
they don't like pancakes.

You gonna try and
glue 'em back on?

No need.

Fucking A.

Guess it was a good day
to be a robot boy.

Am I right?

How do I see my kid's
Facehole?

Create a profile, send her a friend request
, and wait for her not to accept it.

I was thinking
you could stick a...

cyber finger in it,
jiggle the handle,

and unlock it for me.

First of all, none of
what you just said makes sense.

And if you're asking me to hack
into it for you... No!

I saved your life, and you can't
do this one lousy thing for me?

Actually, you put me in safety
mode when you pushed my reset button.

And now my cyber fingers won't jiggle
unless my dad turns it off.

You're locked out of your own brain?
That's fucked up.

I thought I was fucked up.

Hey, Siri,
what's the Doom Patrol?

Will you please
stop doing that?

His shit's busted
right now, Jane.

"Doom Patrol"? Never heard of them.
Why do you ask?

Mr. Nobody

kind of asked me to find them.

How come you're helping her
with her thing, but not mine?

Feel free
to take it personally.

Here we go.
Okay, Doom Patrol.

A minor superhero team
active from the early to late '50s.

And then they just...
dropped off the scene.

They're so... smiley.

Look more like a creepy
sex cult than superheroes.

What happened to them?

- Doesn't say.
- Two words...

tracksuits, and Kool-Aid.

Why are you looking
at pictures of the Doom Patrol?

You've heard of them?

If you must know,
I had a brief love affair with Mento.

Mento.

Steve Dayton?

The fifth richest man
in America...

in 1955.

The guy with the salad spinner
on his head?

It's a psionic amplifier.

It enhances his natural
psychic abilities.

Our liaison ended poorly
and I don't wish to speak of it.

No one cares. Start talking.

Well, I never met the others.

Niles only introduced me
to Steve.

How did Niles know him?

I have no idea.

Did you ever ask this dude
anything about himself?

Anything at all?

It was a very introspective
time in my life.

Do you have any idea why Mr. Nobody would
point us inthe direction of Doom Patrol?

Mr. Nobody wants you
to find them.

And you're doing it.

You got a problem with that?

What, with you doing precisely
what the bad guy told you to do?

No. Why would we have
a problem with that?

I didn't hear you complaining
when he helped us stop the Decreator.

By all means, let's t
rust the degenerate who kidnapped Niles

and shoved an entire town
up a donkey's ass.

Yeah. Unfortunately,
I don't give a fuck what you think.

We're got nothing else to go on
right now.

You're my in
and you're my backup.

So shut your assholes
because we're doing this.

Please, God, don't let me
puke in my bandages.

What?

- Where...
- We're here.

Jane, I want no part
of this nonsense.

Have Flit take me back
this instant.

Hang on, let me tell her.

Uh-huh? Uh-huh?

Yeah, Flit says
to fuck yourself in the face.

We're not leaving here
till we find the Doom Patrol.

Hey.

Hey, you guys are...

Trust me,

when I tell you ladies
you do not wanna fuck with me.

Remember, it's always better
to subdue your opponent if you can.

What is this shit?
A fucked-up Rushmore?

Deadly force should be
your last resort.

Okay...

Okay, kids! You guys wanna see
what your teachers look like

on the inside?

Jane.

Where is Niles?

I was just gonna ask you
the same goddamn thing.

Magnificent.

How long did it take?

Didn't think to time it. Sorry.

My arm cannon overheated.

What I wanna know is
why you deployed it in the first place.

To get Niles back.

The man who took him,
Mr. Nobody, he was right here.

I'm sorry, who?

Mr. Nobody. He's a member
of the Brotherhood of Evil.

He's bad news, Pops.

He should be on the JLA
watchlist or something.

The JLA doesn't tend to overlook
the credible threats.

If he mattered,
they'd know him.

You don't care if Niles
lives or dies, do you?

He's your friend.

We haven't been friends
for ages.

So what, that makes him
your enemy?

This is none
of your concern, Vic.

Now, suffice it to say, when you
mix in with weirdos, and pseudo-scientists,

you reap the consequences.

Enough about all that.

We should get started.

How long is this thing
gonna take?

Depending on the damage,

three hours at the most.

- But don't worry, you'll be in sleep mode.
- What?

You won't feel a thing.
It'll be just like taking a nap.

No, no, no.
I gotta be awake for this.

I gotta see how
this thing works.

Victor, do you want me
to reboot you or not?

- How big was that explosion?
- Not very.

Why?

This week's "Stupid Criminal"
spotlight is on Steve Larson,

also known as
Animal Vegetable Mineral Man.

He was attacked by
his secondary dinosaur head

during a robbery gone wrong.

Let's take a look.

Open the register! Now! Now!

Ow! God damn it!

Not the face! Not the face!

Ow! Ow!

What a tit.

Larson was charged with armed robbery.

His dinosaur,
with aiding and a-biting.

What?

Is one of your fucking fingers
inside me?

You really gotta phrase it
that way, huh?

Get the fuck out!

It appears that Niles Caulder's
indestructible man...

Isn't.

I think I have a blowtorch
and some chewin' tobacco in the car.

Fix you right up.

The hell's that
supposed to mean?

Okay, look.

My dad's gonna power me down
when he runs the diagnostics,

you cannot leave me alone
with him.

Why? What's he gonna do?

I don't know. That's the point.

Look, I need you to watch
what he does, and tell me after, okay?

Sure. I can help you out
with that.

Thank you.

But you gotta help me out
with Clara's Facehole.

Please, Cliff.

All right.

Have a nice snooze, buddy.

The Chief started this place?

When?

After the
Doom Patrol retired.

This was their headquarters.

It was Niles' idea to
turn it into a school for meta-humans.

Mento, Rhea, and Arani,
they all agreed to stay on.

As teachers.

How did Niles get involved
with superheroes?

Niles never said.

You know he has his secrets.

You said
your name was Josh Clay.

Have we met before?

No.

I don't believe so.

Were you
in the military?

Briefly.

So Niles kept his shit tight,

- but he told you about me.
- Yeah.

You could say that.

What?

This is your room.

What?

Isn't that why you're here?

Niles didn't send you?

Niles is missing.

"Taken" would be
more accurate.

By who?

Some ass-bag named
Mr. Nobody.

Mr. Nobody?

Who has he taken?

- You know this Nobody freak?
- Jane.

You and I should talk.

Arani, would you mind
showing Larry around?

I don't wanna put anybody out.

No, no, no.
Enjoy the tour, LT.

Take pictures.

The thing about me is,

once I set my mind to a task,
I excel at it.

When I played Jules Niagara
in Three Sabres to Saskatchewan,

I learned the Dance of
the Seven Veils in less than a day.

It's a very complicated number,
Niles.

It is, yes. I've seen it.

So, the fact that I can't
seem to keep

myself together by now
doesn't give me much hope

that a stranger can help me.

Well, I certainly understand
how you feel. And I agree,

you are
an exceptional woman, but...

it's only been a month.

And we are in

uncharted territory.

Do you know how long
a month is in Hollywood?

Every second that passes,
my name gets colder and colder.

If I don't nip this business
in the bud soon,

I may well be stuck here
forever. No offense.

No, this is a safe place.

That is what you make of it.

Isn't there a vitamin shot
I could take instead?

Dr. Kurtz, he will prescribe
you anything you ask for.

Anything at all.
Maybe we should call him.

You and I both know, Rita,

whatever's going on with you
goes deeper than that.

I believe your issue
is as much

psychological,
as it is physiological.

And this...

Mento...

aside from being
fantastically rich, is a doctor?

Not exactly. No.

Ah!

- Am I late?
- No.

Right on time. Steve Dayton,

I'd like you to meet
Rita Farr.

It's a pleasure, Ms. Farr.

Niles, I don't think
I'm comfortable with this.

This may be hard to believe,
but when Niles first found me,

I looked like the creature
from your last film.

After Mick Manly
had killed him.

You're familiar with my work?

Who isn't?

You're... Rita Farr.

It would be my privilege
to work with you.

And what is it that
we'd be doing exactly?

Learning to, uh...

quiet the mind.

Mento has extraordinary
psychic abilities.

He can teach you
how to transcend the emotional obstacles

that are preventing you
from reshaping yourself.

That's your game,
you read minds?

I have a few other tricks
up my sleeve, but, yes,

I can read minds.

Well...

I'm sorry to have wasted
your time, Mr. Dayton,

but I don't care to have some
stranger gawking at my private thoughts.

As tempting
as that might be,

I give you my word
as a gentleman,

that I will not gawk
at anything of yours

without permission.

Starting now.

See?

Not a single peek.

Rita?

My God, it is you.

Steven.

What on earth
are you doing here?

I wish I knew.

You look fantastic.

Oh, please. I'm a mess.

Not on your worst day, doll.

You always were
a smooth talker.

It helped hide
what a judgmental oaf you were.

I certainly had you fooled
for a while.

I was at a low point. Besides,
that was then. I've moved on.

So, there's no harm in us
getting a drink together?

Only to your liver.

Which I pray dies
a slow, mournful death.

I don't know why
Mr. Nobody sent you here,

and I'm sorry to hear
about Niles, but, um...

I'm afraid we can't help you.

Well, that's not a very
super-heroic thing to say.

I'm not a superhero.

I'm an administrator.

And you and your friends
have to leave.

Was I supposed to be
a student or a teacher?

Pardon?

Well, Niles was shipping
me here for a reason, right?

We had a few preliminary
conversations,

but, uh, he wasn't very forthcoming.

Why'd you fob Larry off
to ol' fire fingers back there?

Like you didn't want me
to ask her about Mr. Nobody?

That's none of your concern.

I have a room here.

Maybe it should be.

Perhaps when you officially
move in, we could revisit the matter.

Yeah, sure. I'll go.

Just as soon as you tell me
everything you know about Mr. Nobody.

These are our extracurricular
classrooms.

Niles believes strongly in
encouraging the creative,

as well as
the meta-human abilities.

You don't talk much, do you?

Forgive me, but to be perfectly honest,
I didn't wanna come here.

What was that?

Did you see that?

Forgive the students.

It's all my husband's fault,
really.

He encourages their
harmless prankery.

Oh, you and Josh
are married?

Goodness, no.

I'm married to Niles.

That's one way
to take the edge off.

Though the venue
leaves something to be desired.

The most secure room
in the building.

Due to all the things
that go boom.

And this is the safest place
to hide hooch from the teenagers.

You can't imagine the hijinks
that these meta-kids can get up to.

Good for them.
You're only young once.

What is this horrid thing?

That...

that belonged to Ultimax.

Leader of
the Brotherhood of Evil.

And unfortunately,
the brain escaped.

But he won't get up to
much mischief without his helm.

These aren't
confiscated weapons, they're trophies.

You brought me here
for one reason, to show off.

Well, isn't that the peahen
calling the peacock proud?

No judgment here.
I'm just surprised...

that you'd still want to
impress me.

Given the way things ended
between us.

Maybe I'd just forgotten
what a head-turner you are.

I was a belly dancer,

an SOE spy,

the queen of Muscle Beach...

I...

I used to be Rita Farr.

Star of stage and screen.

Now I don't know who I am.

A blank slate is the perfect
place for you to start to rebuild yourself.

You just have to decide
who it is you wanna be.

The same person
I've always been...

Rita Farr.

Let's begin.

I want you
to close your eyes.

Take a deep breath.

In.

Then out.

In.

And out.

Now open them.

What's happening?

Mento?

It's all right,
you're perfectly safe.

Where am I?

You are nowhere.

All that exists are you...

and your breath.

Breathe in...

...then out.

Good.

Now, repeat after me.

"The person who is breathing
is me."

The person who is breathing
is me.

Again.

The person who is breathing
is me.

The person who is breathing
is me.

The person who is breathing
is me.

The person who is breathing
is me.

The person who is breathing
is me.

This nonsense actually works!

Oh! Good to know
you'll be keeping an open mind.

You probably have strict
psychic-patient rules...

about things like this.

- You're shaking.
- No.

It's just...

What do you think about
wearing the helmet?

Whatever did you have in mind,
Ms. Farr?

I'm not being kinky.

I'm scared, Steve...

of hurting you.

Something terrible happened
once before. If...

you wear the helmet,
you can help me keep control of things.

You are in control of you.

I'll wear the helmet
if you like.

But I know you don't need it.

Wait.

You sure?

Not remotely.

Okay, son,
let's get you rebooted.

You won't feel a thing.

Nighty-night.

All right.

Let's take a look at you.

Looks like none of
your micro-servo units were damaged.

Consider yourself lucky.

You'd need a time machine
to find replacements.

You really think my robo-guts are fucked,
or do you just like shittin' on the Chief?

Well, I don't believe the two
are mutually exclusive.

Niles actually had me consult
on your design.

But then, he refused to take
a single suggestion.

Why?

The man's a dinosaur.

He's terrified of anything that might
threaten to make himor his ideas extinct.

What kind of stuff
would you have done?

Would I be more like
Astro Boy over there?

You would have
been better.

How exactly did this happen?

Vic was scant on the details.

Oh, it was pretty gnarly.

Vic was gonna blast
Mr. Nobody with his hand cannon

and then everything stopped.

Next thing I knew, ka-blam!

Everyone goes fucking flying.

I thought we were dead meat.

Vic? All kinds of fucked up.

He's bleeding.
His hand looked like Elmer Fudd's shotgun

after Bugs Bunny stuck
a cork in it, and then...

I mean, you know, now that I'm really
thinking about it, it wasn't that bad.

He could have been killed.

And for what?

Some puerile teenage rebellion?

Hey, your robo-Boy Scout
bugs the crap out of me,

but even I gotta admit,
what he did yesterday was noble as shit.

He put his ass on the line
to save Chief.

Maybe you should give him a little credit
instead of knocking him down all the time.

What the hell do you know
about being a parent?

Do you really have any idea
what it's like to almost lose a child?

Yeah, I got some idea,
you arrogant fuck-knuckle.

And I got regrets.

What are you gonna have?

It was a small
ceremony, but it was beautiful.

I know it sounds cliche,

but it was the happiest day
of my life.

All my days have been happy
since I met Niles.

Forgive me, but I've
known Niles for almost six decades,

and in all that time,
he's never once mentioned a wife.

Niles and his secrets.

We were married for almost a
year before he told me he had a daughter.

A daughter?

It wasn't until we fought
Mr. Nobody

that he really started
opening up.

You fought Mr. Nobody?

We wiped the floor with him.

Tell me everything.

The Mr. Nobody fight
was the last in the Doom Patrol's career.

Niles brought me in a bit later
to oversee things here.

How it went down exactly...

That depends on who you ask.

It was
Memorial Day weekend,

the park was filled
with families.

That's when Mr. Nobody struck.

At first, it looked like
an ordinary hot-air balloon,

but as it got closer,
people could see that it wasn't.

The balloon was shaped
like a giant...

buttocks.

Instead of a basket
attached to it,

there was a jukebox.

And it played
only one song...

"Hot Diggity" by Perry Como,
and it played it over and over, and over.

Within 20 minutes, everyone
within an earshot went completely insane.

♪ Oh, hot diggity, dog ziggity
Boom what you do to me ♪

♪ It's so new to me What you do to me ♪

♪ Hot diggity, dog ziggity
Boom what you do to me ♪

♪ When you're
Holding me tight ♪

The police arrived first,
but Mr. Nobody was ready for them.

The jukebox was
equipped with a transformer ray

that changed
all the police officers into pinatas.

The crazed crowds
tore them to pieces

and then they ate the candy
from the pinatas.

It was the most
horrible thing that I've ever seen.

When we arrived,

the jukebox split open

and Mr. Nobody leapt out
followed by a hoard of vinyl warriors,

their bodies composed of
long-playing records.

Niles said that Mr. Nobody
was there for him, not us.

And he insisted on being
the tip of our spear.

As the strongest member
of the Doom Patrol,

I led us into the fray.

Rhea and Arani got into
a spot almost immediately.

Luckily, I was there to save them
and destroy Mr. Nobody in one fell swoop.

Mento was so frightened,
he sold his super-suit.

If Niles hadn't been there
to destroy them all, along with Mr. Nobody,

I don't think any of us
would have survived.

Uh-huh. So, Niles
rescued a team of superpeople

from a supervillain?

Without any superpowers?

Why don't you ask him yourself?

- Hello, darling, how was your day?
- Arani, my jewel.

Mmm!

- What a sight for sore eyes.
- Dinner's almost ready.

Fantastic! I'm famished.

How did you escape Mr. Nobody,
Niles?

Mr. Nobody?

Oh, that little devil and his
butt balloon were laid to waste ages ago.

Thanks to my beautiful wife,
that is.

Oh, Niles.

We've got Nobody's balloon
here, somewhere.

It's really
quite a sight to see.

I'm sure it was a terrific
battle, Steven, but...

I'm afraid it was only
the first time Mr. Nobody came after Niles.

He came back.

Impossible.

We KO'd that idiot.

Well, I don't know
what to tell you,

except that he's back,
and he's taken Niles.

- What's happening?
- You're lying.

You couldn't let me
have this, could you?

What on earth
are you going on about?

You came all the way down here
just to ruin me.

Take my wins away,
all the good work that I've done.

- That's not true.
- Please.

We both know
you're capable of anything.

Marybeth?

I didn't say no.

I was too scared
to say anything at all.

Don't!

No!

No. No. No. No.

No. No.

No, no, no, no, no. No.

No. No. No.

No!

What the ever-loving fuck?

It's Mento.
He's going to his dark place.

If we don't do something fast,
he's gonna take us with him.

Rhea.

They're starting to lose
control of their powers.

You stay here, okay?

Wait. What about the students?

There aren't any.

There never were.

Hello, Joshua.

Niles, thank God.
We have to move.

- Mento has had another break.
- Forget him.

And the others.

You and I have more work to do.

No.

Come now, Joshua.

You've done good work here.

But you and I both know
where your talents truly lie.

I can't.

I told you...

never again.

Sweet...

sweet, sweet baby.

Please don't keep me waiting.

Arani, I really think
you need to have a talk with your students.

Arani?

He's run off again.

Who? Niles?

Look what you did!

- Oh, no, no.
- Look what you did!

Sweet, sweet baby.

Sweet, sweet baby.

Come join me!

Sweet, sweet baby.

Come join me!

Okay, this is gonna be okay.

We just happen to be
in The Shining.

Which is fine.

Shelley Duvall and
the kid got out, and so will we.

Captain Trainor, you and I know
there is no getting out.

Once a soldier,
always a soldier.

Now, are you and your partner
ready to continue our mission?

This isn't happening.

This isn't happening!

I am so sorry.

I didn't mean
for this to happen.

Oh, Rita, let's be honest,

you've been grinding this ax
for 60 years.

You're doing this.

Looks pretty real to me.

You sick son of a bitch!

Now, darling,

we both know
you started it.

I envy you, sir.

You get to make the world
safe for democracy single-handedly.

Well, almost single-handedly.

Where is that bastard?

This is your room.

It wasn't always
like this.

Niles formed the Doom Patrol back in
the day as part of a government program.

He selected
their missions and...

One of which inadvertently
put them on Mr. Nobody's radar.

So they really did fight him?

Yeah, but they lost.

Big time.

Mr. Nobody got into
their heads,

preyed on their fears
and weaknesses.

One by one, they all
turned on each other.

They were never the same
after that.

Their minds and bodies
started to deteriorate.

They'd become frightened
and confused easily,

and they would lash out
with their powers.

They became a danger
to themselves, and to others.

So, this was never a school?

It was, uh...

a safe place
for these folks to...

To rest.

I was able to stabilize
Mento's moods with medication.

It was Niles' idea to
modify his helmet,

to try to keep him calm
with an immersive group delusion.

Mento hadn't made a peep
in 50 years.

Until today.

So, you're like what,
their babysitter?

Physician, actually.

I'm also a meta-human.

I don't like to use my powers,

but they're pretty good
to have around here.

Just in case.

Arani said
she's married to Niles.

- Is that...
- All part of the fantasy.

None of you should feel bad
about what you may have seen.

That was just Mento
lashing out with his powers.

Using your biggest fears
against you,

like Mr. Nobody did to him,

and to the others.

Now, I think it's best if...

If you all leave.

What about Arani and Rhea?

This is what their realities
are like.

Don't leave me.

Torturing themselves
with ghosts from their past.

But you can fix it,
right?

I don't know.

Please, Niles...

May I try?

Whoa, whoa. Take it easy, son.

Give yourself a minute.

Am I okay?

Everything looks fine.

So, I'll be heading back.

You gonna pack my bags too?

Not unless you're planning
to come back with me.

But if you would prefer
to be here,

I think you should stay.

Incidentally, I, uh...

enabled your privacy mode.

For real this time.

I won't be
listening in anymore.

I promise.

Am I awake? Or are snakes
gonna start pouring out of your face?

You've been telling me...

you're ready to be
your own man.

I think it's time
I start listening.

Wait.

What's wrong?

How could you?

What are you talking about?

Marybeth?

That poor girl.

You read my mind.

Without my permission.

Don't you dare judge me.

Not after what you've done.

I'm just sorry
I didn't do it sooner.

A long time ago, you taught
me I was my own biggest obstacle,

that I could decide
who I wanted to be.

For the last 60 years,
I decided that Rita Farr

was someone who deserved
to be punished.

I haven't changed my mind
about that.

Rita Farr is...

empty and ugly.

And small.

And I don't wanna be
those things anymore.

I don't wanna be
Rita Farr anymore.

Without her,
I don't know who I am.

All I know is...

I don't want to end up
like you.

Or Arani, or Rhea.

And, who knows.

Maybe if I...

stop trying to forget
the things that haunt me,

and actually face them,

maybe Mr. Nobody won't hold
so much power over me.

I owe you for that.

And I forgive you.

Goodbye, Steve Dayton.

How often
does he come see them?

For real.

Niles?

Not very.

So he just abandoned them?

Like broken toys?

Why would he send me here?

I'm not broken.
He never treated me like I was broken.

- Why would he wanna abandon me too?
- I think...

this is something for you
to discuss with Niles directly.

How the fuck am I supposed
to do that? He's missing.

Then keep looking.

'Cause I think that's what Mr. Nobody
really wants is for you to give up.

That's why he sent you here.

See what happens to those
who cross him.

Good luck to you, Jane, and...

For God sakes,

you be careful.

No offense, but your dad's
a real bite in the ass.

Here.

You hacked it.

I created a profile for you,
sent her a friend request.

She accepted it?

She did. Only, um...

she doesn't know it.

Congratulations.
You're officially catfishing your daughter.

Is this because
I stuck up for you with your pops?

- You did?
- A little.

I just thought that you should

have the chance
to get to know your daughter.

Maybe it's better
for both of you if you

done it from afar.

Been far too long
since we took some publicity photos.

Folks are gonna start to forget
what the Doom Patrol means.

Captain Trainor, are you and
your partner ready to continue our mission?

I know.

I don't wanna
think about it either.

What the fuck?

"Me and Dad"?

What the hell is she doing
with Bump?

Bump. Bump.

Bump. Bump...

Bump! Bump! Bump! Bump! Bump!