Doctor Who (1963–1989): Season 2, Episode 23 - The Knight of Jaffa - full transcript

While the Doctor, Ian, and Vicki are drawn into the intrigues of King Richard's court, Barbara has to cope with an impatient Saladin and the vengeful El Akir.

Our young friend is a woman, Sire. Have pity. Let us help her.

- Please, your Majesty.
- Understand this!

This woman can rot in one of Saladin's prisons until her hair turns white

before I'll trade with the man that killed my friends!

My lord,

although we left a little of our pride back in the wood,

there is some capital to be gained from the affair.

Beside the violence and the tragedy, it has a humour.

Humour? Is he delirious?

I think I know what he means, Sire.

Here Saladin, mighty ruler and commander of huge armies,

believes he's captured you, hmm!

You could turn this into a good story against Saladin.

Look on the brighter side, my lord.

A troop of men to capture one of your knights?

Why he-he'd need an army by itself and more to take your horse,

or every man he has or more to take you prisoner.

You could spread this tale by word of mouth and all the world...

- would know that Saladin fears you, hmm?
- Sire,

if you send to him and asked if he'd finished playing his game...

and could you have your knight back, it would make him look such a fool.

There is a jest here.

Albeit a grim one with our friends dead.

But Saladin must be just as much out of temper over this affair as we are.

Your messenger might offer to exchange a hundred prisoners for the knight he holds.

We think we value Sir William highly.

We do, but it would not be good to let Saladin know.

He might think you undervalue his men - one hundred men to one of yours.

Me thinks a fair bargain, Sire.

By my father's name, you have wit, old man.

Guard... call the Chamberlain!

We recognise the service you have rendered us,

and will be pleased to see you in our court.

We are your servants, Sire.

As to the sending of a messenger...


Brother, are you wounded?

Even my pride has been mended, sister.

See these good people: courage, loyalty, and wit are gathered here.

Forgive me, my lady.

- This man should be in his bed.
- Yes.

Chamberlain! Where are you?

Coming, Sire! Coming!

Take this knight and see that he is well looked after

and find places for these others. They have our patronage.

Thatcher, guard, lend a hand!

- Be careful. Mind his shoulder.
- We should carry him!

- Shall I help?
- No, I think we can manage.

This is a young man?

His voice has not yet broken, your Highness.

- What is your name?
- Uh... uh, Victor.

Do you sing songs? Or play an instrument?

No, nobody ever showed me.

We must do something about your clothes, at least.

our Highness... Come, Victor! Let us tend upon the others.

Thank you young man. You may leave him to us.

Giving him back his belt didn't help us very much.

I certainly didn't like the way the Chamberlain examined Vicki's clothes.

And come to think of it, they were originally stolen from here.

- Strange people.
- Good friends.

And what is this? I have not seen this jewel before.

A gift from the man you fight.


His brother, Saphadin. Oh, I have given no cause for his attention.

Saladin sends me presents of fruit and snow when I am sick,

and now his brother decorates you with his jewels.

Yet with our armies do we both lock in deadly combat,

watering the land with a rain of blood,

and the noise of thunder is drowned in the shouts of dying men.

Your heart calls for England, Richard.

Aye, it does.

Is there no kind of peace with Saladin?

All wise men look for peace. The terms of peace make wise men look fools.

I would have Ascalon,

but Saladin fears that if he gives me that town then I will invade Egypt,

and nothing I can say can make him change his mind.

How this jewel radiates the light.

So... Saphadin desires my sister.

But surely you and Saladin have some common meeting ground, Richard.



Now take this and tell me where the woman is.


- Then bring her to me.
- No!

- Then deserve my displeasure!
- My lord is greater than you!

Where is she??

She was a fool not to take the ring.

But perhaps you were asking too much for it.

Now I have something to ask of... someone. If only I knew their price.

I'm not bought by you, merchant.

You are an Emir, El Akir.

What possessions of mine could possibly match those you already own?

But I am travelled from Tyre to speak with Saladin at Ramlah,

a weary journey,

and neither he nor his brother will receive me.

It's nothing to me. I am leaving Ramlah!

- Do you return to your palace at Lydda?
- Yes.

Then what keeps you here?

We both have reasons for being here, El Akir.

Can we not help each other?

And what is your reason, merchant?

Conrad of Tyre has sent an emissary here to make a treaty with your overlord.

I come on his heels.

What lies unwanted on my ships at Tyre will find a home in Saladin.

What lies unwanted on my ships at Tyre will find a home in Saladin.

And from him I can buy and stock my ships again.

And what is my part in this, merchant?

Arrange an audience with Saladin or his brother.

But how will I repay such a favour?

There is a woman here,

n English woman. She made me look a fool.

I shall take her to my palace at Lydda

and then we shall see who the fool is...

or the master!

A simple matter.

Arrange my audience then wait by the stables.

I'll bring the woman to you.

Your lord will be dazzled with your beauty, my lady.

Thank you, Sheyrah.

- Lady, I...
- What is it?

Uh, the whispers are about that you will tell a never-ending story...

Oh, yes...

- how did I get myself involved in this?
- Be at peace, my lady.

You only tremble at the honour of appearing before the great Sultan.

I must tell you something, my lady.

You have made an enemy... you must beware...

- An enemy?
- El Akir is planning..

I know not what, but he's an evil man.

Wh - how do you know this?

Already he has tried to buy my loyalty with precious stones.

You must be cautious.

Escape if you can.

El Akir? But... but surely Saladin...

I cannot say more, my lady.

- Sheyrah...
- Please, my lady!!

I will fetch your shoes.

Escape? But how?

A never-ending story.

Oh... what am I going to do?

Stories... stories...

Shakespeare! Yes! Romeo and Juliet!

Hans Christian Andersen...

Liliput... Gulliver's Tra--

I am Luigi Ferrigo... merchant from Genoa.

I have got a horse for you at the stables.

- Did Sir William send you?
- Which shoes shall I bring, my lady?

Yes, yes, he sent me. Now please hurry!

My la-?

My lady?

- But where is he?
- We are almost there!

Now please hurry!

The man should be here.

He is.

Your way is open to the Sultan's brother.

I think this whole thing is ridiculous!

You do, do you? Then I suggest we get along with it.

- But what have I got to put this lot on?
- How should I know, dear fellow?

If the King wants you to surely that's good enough.

Anyway, what are you complaining about?

For all you know, it might give you a better chance to find Barbara.

Never mind the mights, my dear. Just concentrate on what you're doing.

Here we are now. I think just the...

just the sword and, uh, you're ready.

- Ready for what??
- Oh, the King will tell you that.

D'you know, my boy, I have an idea

that King Richard still wants to send you to see Saladin after all.

And not only this kingdom,

its towns and fortresses shall be yours,

but also the Frankish kingdom.

Our sister, the Princess Joanna,

whose beauty is already spoken of

wherever men of judgement and discernment are,

is a fit match for one who not only enjoys so grand...

uh no, not grand, uh... eminent... so eminent

a brother as the Sultan Saladin

but who also possesses an element of his own.

Prince Saphadin, we beg you to prefer this match

and thus make us your brother.

Now, let me see.

Hmm, see it's delivered immediately.

Ahh, Sirrah...

some business with you. Come closer.

Your royal commands have been carried out, your majesty.

Take this gold belt to the Sultan Saladin.

Beg him to release Sir William des Preaux and your companion.

- Ian... how marvellous!
- You are very gracious, Sire.

Do you wonder why I listen to your appeal?

It is a king's prerogative to make yesterday's deafness today's keen hearing.

No, more than that -

although we do not doubt that we are surrounded by loyal men,

yet we fear that war is uppermost in their minds.

Between ourselves we plan a match between Joanna and Saphadin

to bring peace.

This is why we choose to send you rather than those who are closer to us.

Bring back Sir William and your companion.

But bring us hope as well.

This blood-letting must stop!

May I leave at once, Sir?

Is it love of peace or is it love of your companion that prompts this enthusiasm?

Well, whatever the reason, may it speed you back to us.

I have one duty to perform before you leave. Give me the sword, boy.

You are without rank or title

and while we do not doubt your courage,

our emissary shall speak from a proper position of authority.

What is your name?

- Ian Chesterton.
- Kneel.

- But I...
- Kneel, kneel, my boy.

Kneel, kneel, come along, come along...

In the name of God, St. Michael, and St. George,

we dub you SIR Ian,

Knight of Jaffa.

Arise Sir Ian and be valiant.

Your majesty.

- ...with long white hair?
- Yes, my lord, yes.

A dark cloak, which nearly brushes the ground?

The same, and if he has the articles you mentioned, then he stole them from me.

Then we shall wait here for his return and face him with his infamy.

Perfumes, materials from Baghdad, ivory, gold, spices -

all these, Prince Saphadin, are now but a trickle because of this war.

My brother has not yet made any treaty with Conrad of Tyre.

I am a merchant,

and hope I do no wrong in anticipating events, my lord.

You are seeking a concession?

I am, yes Sire.

I am well-known for my proper dealings.

Yes, your reputation has flown ahead of you.

Where there are transactions to be made, there will one find Master Ferrigo.

It is my calling, Prince Saphadin.

Well, help me judge another matter

and I may understand your mind a little better.

- I will hear this.
- Yes, brother.

This is a domestic matter only,

but since it concerns a person nearer your way of thinking than ours,

we welcome your advice.

- A prisoner has escaped.
- Indeed?

A woman, one I hoped might perhaps divert this court.

I had reason to believe she was a teller of stories.


Do not blame me!

- Tell me what happened.
- I do not know.

I went to fetch her shoes, and when I returned she was gone. That's all I know!

And you, Sir William, know nothing of this affair?

Nothing, lord Saladin.

I would not encourage a lady to venture out alone.

I believe you.

Nor do I believe the woman would go by herself.

What is your opinion, merchant?

Uh, this woman, uh, had an accomplice perhaps,

a companion who helped her, acted as her guide.

She was abducted, that is the only explanation.


I see, of course. That is an explanation.

What else have you to say, woman?

- You mean... what I found?
- Yes.

On the table I found a glove.

- A man's glove?
- Yes, my lord!

This glove?

Yes lord!

It... has a companion, Sir William.

Where is she? What have you done with her?

I - I - I - I took her...

to El Akir...

I hope you will find Barbara safe and well, dear boy -

err, heh, Sir Ian.

Good luck, Ian. Be as quick as you can.

- I will Vicki.
- Godspeed!

And remember: be valiant!

I almost wish I'd been knighted, too.

That'll be the day! Come on, let's go and tidy Ian's things.

- Ah! I have been waiting to speak with you.
- Oh? Pray, what about?


- I beg your pardon!
- What's this?

Visitor of sorrows, depriver of my children, robber of my goods!

- Who is this? Do you know?
- No...

ooh, his face is a bit familiar...

- You stole some clothing!
- Really?

Do you see this riding habit? It was taken from this very room.

Now it is back here again.

And a pretty poor garment, too, hmm, hmm!

- This... and this... stolen from me.
- And stolen from me!

Yes, now there really is a point there, isn't there?

If I stole from you, my lord Chamberlain, how could I steal from him?

You did! You did steal from me!

Then how could I steal from him, eh? You blockhead!

Oh please! Please! Now I had the clothes first.

- Oh, how nice for you.
- And I had them second.

- Did you buy them?
- Yes.

From us?


Then whoever it was stole them from you must have sold them to you.

- Now, don't you agree, hmm?
- Er... yes.

My lord Chamberlain, a ship is in the harbour disgorging fruit from Acre.

That's the man! I bought them from him!

He must have stolen them from you.

Now just a minute!

Oh, my dear Chamberlain - so undignified.

The merchant bought the clothes in good faith and paid for them in good money.

- Now please return his money.
- But - but I must catch the thief!

Now, now, now! You mustn't let an honest man suffer! Pay him!

- Thatcher! Thatcher!
- Joy to you, my lord!

- Giver of life to my father, provider!
- Yes, off you go! Off you go!

Well, we seem to have got out of that problem alright, hmm?

The woman tied to the horse - bring her!

Another one for El Akir's cage.

I swear it to be the finest collection in Islam.

- Kidnapped??
- Yes, Sir Ian. I fear so

Your rescue has come too late.

- Well, who's taken her??
- This Genoese merchant!

He explained it away by saying that Barbara had conceived a passion for El Akir.

Saladin and his brother accept the story, but I do not!

Well of course not! It's a lie.

They could be as friendly as a hawk and a sparrow.

Where can I find El Akir?

He has returned to Lydda since falling out with Saladin.

- Is Lydda very far away?
- No

but it's El Akir's territory, where he has his men.

I'm going after her.

El Akir has an evil reputation.

'Tis my belief he captured your companion as revenge,

and in his eyes she would make a fine addition to his harem.