Coach (1989–1997): Season 1, Episode 6 - Gambling for Meat - full transcript
Luth has predicted the right score of the humiliating loss which leads to his suspension.
FEMALE NARRATOR: Coach is
filmed before a studio audience.
Great speech, Coach.
Hey, thanks, Daub.
Of course, you think
they're all great.
Thanks, Coach.
What'd you think, Luther?
I thought it was a good speech.
No, I mean, what do you think
about the game?
Oh, I don't think there's
any way we can win the game.
Come on, come on,
you got to be positive, Luther.
I mean, what are we?
14-point underdogs?
16. As of this morning.
All right. Two touchdowns
and a field goal.
Come on, that's nothing.
Especially when
we're playing at home
in front of
a sold-out crowd.
Well, actually it's about two-thirds full.
As of this morning.
All right, so that's 20,000
people instead of 30,000.
And about 10,000 of them
are Iowa fans that drove up.
All right. Great. Okay. I mean, there's still...
We can beat these guys.
Come on, they're not
super-men, they're not Titans.
I mean, they're young kids,
just like our kids.
Okay, those black and gold jerseys
make them look a little bigger,
that's just psychology.
There is no reason here
to be intimidated.
(BANGING ON DOOR)
Pal, I'm turned around.
Where's the visitors'
locker room?
Iowa's down the hall.
But you only got three minutes,
you'll never make the game.
That's all right.
I'm not a starter.
Gee, I hope the guys
didn't see that.
MALE ANNOUNCER: Ladies and
gentlemen, please drive home safely.
Once again the final score
of today's game
was Iowa, 44,
Minnesota State, 3.
I'll get your coat off.
Yeah, all right.
I'm really sorry, Coach.
Thanks.
Here, why don't you
sit down over here?
Sure.
There you go.
All right.
Can I get you something to
drink, Coach?
I'm not thirsty, Nick.
Just bring him
an iced tea.
You want me
to leave the menu?
No, I'm not eating, Nick.
Bring him a steak.
You want a salad
or anything to start?
No.
I'll fix him a small one.
I just can't believe it.
It wasn't that bad, Coach.
44 to 37
I mean, I thought we had it inside
us to beat those guys today.
We did, Coach.
It was just,
every time
it started to come out,
they pounded it back in.
I think we can take
comfort in one thing.
I bet you a lot of people
would've bet
that we'd lose to Iowa
by a lot more than 44 to 3.
Ladies and gentlemen,
we have a winner tonight
in our "Guess The Score,
Win A Steak Contest.”
Correctly predicting
today's score
of Iowa, 44,
and Minnesota State, 3,
was Luther Van Dam!
(PEOPLE CHEERING)
How about that?
NICK:
Congratulations, Luther.
I've never won
anything in my life.
Talk about lucky.
Hi.
Hey, Luth.
You still mad at me?
No, I'm not mad.
Yes, you are.
You're still mad. I can tell.
Luth, I just said
I wasn't mad.
Yes, you are.
If you weren't mad,
you'd ask me how my weekend was.
How was your weekend?
Not so good. I spent the whole
time worrying you were still mad.
Luther, listen,
we had all this out on Saturday night.
Yes, I was mad and I had a right to be.
You bet against the team.
Now, it's one thing
to be negative around here,
but it's another thing
to go public with it.
I wasn't trying
to be negative.
Wait a minute.
You don't think predicting
that we'd lose 44 to 3
wasn't being negative?
I thought we'd lose
44 to nothing.
I just threw in the three
to be positive.
I can't talk
about this anymore.
Just don't do it
again, okay, Luther?
Okay.
(STAMMERING)
You're sure you're not mad?
I'm not mad. Come on, it's over with.
It's finished.
I'm never gonna bring it up again and I
don't want you bringing it up again either.
Okay, fair enough?
Fair enough.
I'm positive about one thing.
You're still mad.
I don't mean to start off
Monday morning oh a sour note,
but we've got a gigantic scandal brewing.
Where's Luther?
He's in the team room.
Hayden, are you aware that that
steak he won Saturday night
is a National Collegiate
Athletic Association violation?
What?
It's gambling, Hayden.
It was gambling for meat.
Meat or money,
it was ill-gotten gains.
I'm telling you, if this leads
to a major investigation,
the whole program
could be disciplined.
And I'm not talking
just football.
I'm talking basketball, baseball,
hockey, water polo, intramural sports...
Gee, all the things
I really care about.
That's not funny, Hayden.
I know. Well, how is the NCAA
gonna find out anyway?
Mr. Lucky has his picture
in the paper this morning.
Now, we have to show the NCAA
that we are taking action,
or they'll never get off our tails.
lam telling you, Hayden,
they're bloodsuckers.
Well, what do you want me
to do, Howard?
I want you to suspend Luther
for 30 days.
What?
Oh, no, Howard,
I can't do that.
I mean, I just told him that
all this stuff was behind us.
I mean, you know how
he reacts to bad news.
I mean, if you wanna punish
him, let me break his nose,
or cut out his liver,
'cause this is gonna kill him.
I'm sorry that this is going to upset
him, but it's him or the school.
Well, I can't suspend Luther!
I mean,
why can't we suspend somebody who
doesn't actually contribute anything?
You know, somebody
who's not gonna be missed.
Somebody like you, Howie.
Are you gonna take care
of this or am I gonna do it?
No, no, no,
I'll do it, I'll do it.
I know it won't be easy,
but it's better
coming from a friend.
Morning, Luther.
Have a good week.
(CLEARING THROAT)
I didn't know Howard was here.
I was just loading up the game tapes from Saturday.
You wanna look at them?
In a minute.
In a minute.
What's the matter?
Nothing. Nothing. There's just
something I got to tell you. That's all.
This is something good
or something bad?
Well, it depends on
how you look at it.
Oh, God!
Oh, Luther.
Come on, I don't want you
getting all upset here, now.
I don't want you jumping to any conclusions.
Just let me explain this to you.
Something's happened.
Nothing has happened.
Something's happened. You wouldn't be
talking to me if something hadn't happened.
Luther, nothing has happened!
Now just get a grip on yourself,
and come on now, don't interrupt me,
and just let me explain to you
in as calm a way as I can
what has happened.
Something's happened?
Look, I was just talking
to Howard.
Now, as it turns out,
your winning that steak
at the Touchdown Club
Saturday night
was an extremely minor
NCAA rules violation.
Okay?
And the reason it was a violation,
'cause you bet against the team
and you won something for it.
Uh-huh.
Now, I'm gonna have to
suspend you for 30 days, huh?
That's it.
That's all there is to it,
there's nothing more than that. No big deal.
Okay?
Now, you and I have been
together 20 years, huh, bud?
Now look at it this way,
I mean,
I want you to look at this suspension
as something positive, you know,
not something discouraging
or disappointing.
I mean, look at all the things
you can do in 30 days, Luther.
You can travel,
you can read a book, you can do all
sorts of things you never done before.
(STAMMERING) When does
this officially begin?
Well. Now.
(EXCLAIMS)
The sooner we get it started,
the sooner it's gonna be over with.
Okay.
I guess I'll just
go on home now.
Are you sure
you're all right with this?
(STAMMERING)
Yeah. I'm fine. I...
You explained it to me.
I'm fine.
I mean, it's only a suspension.
There's nothing more to it than that.
Right.
I'll see you in 30 days,
right?
Okay.
Hey, Luth, how you doing?
I'm fired!
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
What the hell?
CHRISTINE: Who is it?
It's Luther.
Luther, it's 4:00 in the morning.
What are you doing here?
I saw your light was on.
I need to talk to you, Hayden.
Can't it wait?
Actually, I don't need to talk to you.
I wanted to use your typewriter.
What is going on?
Oh, hi, Christine.
I didn't know you were here.
She got to spend the night.
You know, it was kind of special, Luther.
Oh, that's nice. You two go on back to bed.
You won't even know I'm here.
He's going to type?
I don't know.
Luther, what are you doing?
Typing my résumé.
Why?
Hayden fired me.
I didn't fire you, I suspended you.
You know that.
I know what you said today,
and I've been thinking about it, Hayden.
I know what's gonna happen.
You'll go 30 days without me and find out
you don't need me and I'll be out of a job.
Oh, Luther, Hayden isn't going to
find out that he doesn't need you.
Oh, I know he thinks he isn't
gonna find out he doesn't need me.
But I know what I do.
And I know he doesn't need it.
He does too.
Hayden,
tell Luther you need him.
He knows I need him.
But he needs to hear it.
I need you, Luther.
Come on, Luther,
you know I need you.
Who's gonna run the defense
if ll don't have you?
Yeah, but where are you gonna find
another guy to hold a team to 44 points?
Look, I've been at this game
longer than either one of you.
I know what's
gonna happen.
I predicted we'd lose
the game today
and I predicted
I'll lose my job.
Should I put on some coffee?
Okay.
No, no, 'cause I'm predicting
he's not staying that long.
Luther, I don't know
how to tell you this.
You're not fired.
You're not gonna be fired.
You're gonna be with me
until you die,
which could be tonight
unless you get out of here.
Maybe I should make
some breakfast.
Hey, can I type while I eat?
You don't need to type!
The resume's not gonna look very professional
written on the back of a program.
Am I talking at a frequency
he can't hear?
You know, Luther,
you know what your problem is?
You don't think
you're a good coach.
You think the only reason you got
this job is because we're friends.
Well, that's where
you're wrong, Luther.
We're not friends?
Yes, of course, we're friends.
But that's not why you got the job.
You got the job because you know
what you're doing. I mean, you must.
You certainly don't have it
because of your personality.
Well, Hayden.
I mean, look at him.
He's got a terrible attitude.
You got no self-confidence.
And you're annoying.
Hayden!
Well, he is annoying.
My God, it's 4:00 in the morning.
Aren't you annoyed?
Well...
Well, of course, you're annoyed.
She's annoyed. We're both annoyed.
You're annoying!
God, you got a negative thing
going all the time,
you're always predicting
the team's gonna lose.
I don't know who'd wanna
be around a man like that
unless he were a good coach.
And that's all the proof I can give you, Luther.
I don't know what else I can say
that's gonna make you
feel any better.
Would you be willing to say all
that in a letter of recommendation?
(EXCLAIMING)
Morning, Coach.
Daub.
I brought you fresh coffee.
(COUGHING)
Thanks.
How you feeling?
Terrible.
My back's all twisted up
half the night,
my neck is stiff from
sleeping on this football.
Maybe tonight you can sleep
at your place again.
Oh, no, I can't.
Luther's gonna be there.
I mean, he's there every night.
I can't take
any more of this, Dauber.
Have you seen the paper yet
this morning?
Why?
I don't wanna make you
feel any worse,
but there's this kind of weird
ad I think you should see.
"Job wanted.
"Ex-defensive coordinator from
large state university in Minnesota
"seeks work of any kind.
“Call LN.D. at KL5-2884
any time, day or night."
You think that
could be Luther?
I think that there's
a good chance it's Luther.
These are his initials and
that's his phone number, Daub.
That's what I was thinking.
Ah.
Well, I don't understand it.
I mean,
I just don't believe it.
He actually thinks
he's not coming back.
I mean, what makes a person think
that the worst is always gonna happen?
I think they call it
general anxiety disorder.
Huh?
Yeah. We've been studying this
in my Psychology class.
See, chronic negative thinking
is actually just
a defense mechanism.
The subject believes
that if they always think
that everything is
gonna turn out bad,
then they'll never be hurt
or disappointed.
Wow, that's interesting, Daub.
What do you do
for a person like that?
I'll know next week.
Dad?
Hey, Kelly.
Hi, Daub.
Hi, look, I'm sorry
to bother you so early...
Are you all right?
You look terrible.
Yeah, thanks. See, I was
afraid I was hiding it.
Did you spend the night here?
Yeah, I did.
It's a real long story, honey.
I don't want to go into it.
What do you want?
Something with
you and Christine?
No.
Hey, Kelly, don't make me
be rude, babe, all right?
I've just had a hard couple of days.
That's all. What do you need?
I just wanted to know
what was going on with Luther.
You saw the ad, didn't you?
No, I saw Luther.
How come you fired him?
I didn't fire him.
Well, he told me you did.
See? Now he's telling
my daughter I fired him.
He's going around
telling everybody I fired him.
Why would I fire him
when it's just so much easier
to run him over with a car?
Coach, Coach.
No, I mean it. I've had it.
I'm gonna put a stop to this once and for all!
What are you going to do?
I don't know.
I don't know,
but I got to do something.
I'm telling you, he is making himself
nuts, and he is making me nuts!
No, Coach, actually
Luther is not making you nuts.
You're allowing him
to make you nuts
by playing
the role of the victim.
See, you've got to realize
that you have the power
to protect your own space and
your own personal boundaries.
You are in control.
But not for long, if I have
to listen to that cow flop.
Okay, where was he when you saw
him when he told you all this?
At the Touchdown Club.
Shari and I went there
for coffee this morning.
Oh, okay.
Maybe he's still there.
Yeah, he's still there.
He was our waiter.
I'm glad to see your dad's no
longer suppressing his rage.
Yeah. Taking Psych
this semester, Daub?
Yeah.
I was thinking
about majoring in it,
but it's clear on
the other side of campus.
Good morning.
How you doing, Nick?
How about
that table right there?
Great. Thanks.
NICK: Luther.
LUTHER: Right.
How are you folks
this morning?
Good, how are you?
Well, I'm a little nervous.
This is my first day as a waiter.
I used to be an assistant football
coach, but I got fired Monday.
Oh, really?
Yeah. 34 years of coaching
and now I'm starting
my life over again.
Gee, we're sorry to hear that.
(HESITATING)
They just up
and fired you, huh?
Yeah. They're calling it a suspension,
but I know what it really is.
It's the Wally Pipp story.
The what?
Wally Pipp.
Wally Pipp played first base
for the New York Yankees.
He got the flu one day and they
brought in Lou Gehrig to replace him.
Told Wally he'd be back in the
line-up as soon as he got better.
Two thousand games later,
Lou Gehrig was in the Hall of Fame,
Wally Pipp was in Cincinnati.
They can call it what they want to call
it, but I've been Pipped.
What do you want to eat?
Why don't we just have coffee?
Nobody seems to be
very hungry this morning.
Just coffee?
Yeah.
Better go get some more.
Hey, Coach.
Hey, Nick.
Luther around?
Yeah. He's in the kitchen.
Boy, I feel terrible you had
to fire him over that contest.
Nick, I didn't fire him.
I suspended him.
Can I just talk to him
for a minute, please?
Oh, sure. I'll go get him.
Excuse me.
Aren't you Hayden Fox?
Yeah.
Well, I hope when you've been coaching 34
years, somebody cans you.
Hi, Hayden.
Would you like to try to explain
what it is you are doing here?
You're mad, aren't you?
No, I'm thrilled. I mean,
now I can get a good table.
You just can't believe that
you're coming back, can you?
Yeah, I believe it.
No, you don't.
I mean, if you did,
then you'd be fishing,
or you'd be home reading
that book we talked about.
If this is going to
make you mad, I'll quit.
No, 'cause quitting
isn't going to do any good.
'Cause three hours from now,
you'll be back here
or you'll be working
at some car wash.
Luther, when are you gonna stop
taking every little problem
and turning it into
a major disaster?
'Cause I gotta
tell you,
there's gonna be worse stuff than
this gonna happen to you in your life.
Why? What have you heard?
Luther, get in the car.
Where are we going?
We're gonna go see
Howard Burleigh.
I'm gonna see about
getting you reinstated.
Obviously you're not
gonna be happy until I do.
What about the NCAA?
To hell with the NCAA!
You sure
this is gonna work?
'Cause if you are,
I'll just tell Nick I'm quitting.
Tell Nick you're quitting.
All right. Nick?
Yeah, Luther?
I'm taking my break.
Mrs. Thorkelson,
if Howard Burleigh is in his office,
tell him to get his butt down here!
I want to see him right away!
Boy, is Howard going to be
surprised to see me.
(PHONE BUZZING)
Coach here.
No, Mrs. Thorkelson, you don't
have to use the word "butt."
Get Howard down here,
will you?
What are you gonna
say to him?
Whatever it takes.
I know you. You're the Fox.
Boy, I sure did
miss this place.
You know, they say you
can't go home again, but...
Oh, Luther, shut up.
Right.
Mrs. Thorkelson
said you wanted to...
What's he doing here?
I want Luther back
and I want him back now.
We've been through all this.
Howard, it's not working.
I can't take it anymore.
I mean, you're afraid of a
little NCAA investigation?
Well, I'm not afraid.
Let them investigate. Let them do all
the investigating they want to do.
They want to
take a look at my files.
Let them take a look at my files.
I got nothing to hide.
Now what do you say, Howard?
I say this is my decision.
Not yours.
And I forbid it.
Yeah, I'm sorry,
I didn't hear that last part.
It sounded to me like
you said you forbid it.
That is what I said.
You challenging me,
Howard?
Are you challenging me?
I'm the Head
Football Coach, damn it!
Well,
I'm the Athletic Director!
Well, I'm 6'4"!
Well,
I'm the Athletic Director!
Fine. You're the
Athletic Director? All right.
You coach the team
on Saturday. I quit.
What?
You were a coach,
weren't you, Howard?
I was the golf coach.
You know that.
You're bluffing, Hayden.
Am [? You hired me
to run this program.
Now, either I get to decide
who's suspended and who's not
or I don't want the damn job!
Is this working out
like you had wanted?
Luther, you stay out of this.
This doesn't concern you.
I'm out of here, Howard.
I am history.
HOWARD: You're not serious.
He's not serious.
Oh, I've never been more serious
about anything in my life.
Are you guys interested in
a little lake-front property?
'Cause my cabin is
on the market as of today.
You're actually gonna quit
over a thing like this?
Yes, I am. Yes, I am.
Now for the last time,
do I get Luther back or don't I?
There's nothing I can do.
Fine.
I'll leave my keys
with Mrs. Thorkelson.
I'm sorry, Luther.
I didn't expect that.
Well, you're not gonna
let him do this, are you?
I'm trying to do
what is best for the school.
If all he can think about is
himself, that's his problem.
He wasn't thinking about himself,
he was thinking about me.
Well, he did real well
for you. Now you're both out.
Wait a minute, Howard.
Before you start throwing around
words like "both" and "out,"
could we talk about this?
What is there to talk about?
Well, this whole thing started
because I bet against the team.
I was being negative.
I get like that sometimes.
And, see, that was
the whole problem.
And then you suspended me.
Which was the right thing to do,
but then I panicked and that...
(STAMMERING)
You see, I was negative again.
And see, I got all upset,
and I got Hayden upset.
He got you all upset.
Now, you're the only one left who still has a job.
Well, I don't know
what I can do about that.
Well, you can get him back.
But he won't come back
unless I lift your suspension,
and I can't do that.
I'm not asking you to. All we have to
do is convince Hayden I'm okay with it.
But it's not okay with you.
Oh, yeah.
It's okay with me now.
See. Hayden got mad
because all the time I was
upsetting him and everything,
about being negative,
but I'm over all that now.
I'll never be negative again.
I'll never bet against the team again.
I'll probably never win
another steak,
but I'll never bet
against the team again.
(SIGHING)
Well, I guess
it's worth a try.
And I can tell him that you're
okay with the suspension?
Hey, he wanted me to go on a vacation.
I'm out the door right now.
Tell him I'm taking a book.
I just hope
you're right about this.
Hope I'm right?
I know I'm right.
Howard,
you have to think positive.
filmed before a studio audience.
Great speech, Coach.
Hey, thanks, Daub.
Of course, you think
they're all great.
Thanks, Coach.
What'd you think, Luther?
I thought it was a good speech.
No, I mean, what do you think
about the game?
Oh, I don't think there's
any way we can win the game.
Come on, come on,
you got to be positive, Luther.
I mean, what are we?
14-point underdogs?
16. As of this morning.
All right. Two touchdowns
and a field goal.
Come on, that's nothing.
Especially when
we're playing at home
in front of
a sold-out crowd.
Well, actually it's about two-thirds full.
As of this morning.
All right, so that's 20,000
people instead of 30,000.
And about 10,000 of them
are Iowa fans that drove up.
All right. Great. Okay. I mean, there's still...
We can beat these guys.
Come on, they're not
super-men, they're not Titans.
I mean, they're young kids,
just like our kids.
Okay, those black and gold jerseys
make them look a little bigger,
that's just psychology.
There is no reason here
to be intimidated.
(BANGING ON DOOR)
Pal, I'm turned around.
Where's the visitors'
locker room?
Iowa's down the hall.
But you only got three minutes,
you'll never make the game.
That's all right.
I'm not a starter.
Gee, I hope the guys
didn't see that.
MALE ANNOUNCER: Ladies and
gentlemen, please drive home safely.
Once again the final score
of today's game
was Iowa, 44,
Minnesota State, 3.
I'll get your coat off.
Yeah, all right.
I'm really sorry, Coach.
Thanks.
Here, why don't you
sit down over here?
Sure.
There you go.
All right.
Can I get you something to
drink, Coach?
I'm not thirsty, Nick.
Just bring him
an iced tea.
You want me
to leave the menu?
No, I'm not eating, Nick.
Bring him a steak.
You want a salad
or anything to start?
No.
I'll fix him a small one.
I just can't believe it.
It wasn't that bad, Coach.
44 to 37
I mean, I thought we had it inside
us to beat those guys today.
We did, Coach.
It was just,
every time
it started to come out,
they pounded it back in.
I think we can take
comfort in one thing.
I bet you a lot of people
would've bet
that we'd lose to Iowa
by a lot more than 44 to 3.
Ladies and gentlemen,
we have a winner tonight
in our "Guess The Score,
Win A Steak Contest.”
Correctly predicting
today's score
of Iowa, 44,
and Minnesota State, 3,
was Luther Van Dam!
(PEOPLE CHEERING)
How about that?
NICK:
Congratulations, Luther.
I've never won
anything in my life.
Talk about lucky.
Hi.
Hey, Luth.
You still mad at me?
No, I'm not mad.
Yes, you are.
You're still mad. I can tell.
Luth, I just said
I wasn't mad.
Yes, you are.
If you weren't mad,
you'd ask me how my weekend was.
How was your weekend?
Not so good. I spent the whole
time worrying you were still mad.
Luther, listen,
we had all this out on Saturday night.
Yes, I was mad and I had a right to be.
You bet against the team.
Now, it's one thing
to be negative around here,
but it's another thing
to go public with it.
I wasn't trying
to be negative.
Wait a minute.
You don't think predicting
that we'd lose 44 to 3
wasn't being negative?
I thought we'd lose
44 to nothing.
I just threw in the three
to be positive.
I can't talk
about this anymore.
Just don't do it
again, okay, Luther?
Okay.
(STAMMERING)
You're sure you're not mad?
I'm not mad. Come on, it's over with.
It's finished.
I'm never gonna bring it up again and I
don't want you bringing it up again either.
Okay, fair enough?
Fair enough.
I'm positive about one thing.
You're still mad.
I don't mean to start off
Monday morning oh a sour note,
but we've got a gigantic scandal brewing.
Where's Luther?
He's in the team room.
Hayden, are you aware that that
steak he won Saturday night
is a National Collegiate
Athletic Association violation?
What?
It's gambling, Hayden.
It was gambling for meat.
Meat or money,
it was ill-gotten gains.
I'm telling you, if this leads
to a major investigation,
the whole program
could be disciplined.
And I'm not talking
just football.
I'm talking basketball, baseball,
hockey, water polo, intramural sports...
Gee, all the things
I really care about.
That's not funny, Hayden.
I know. Well, how is the NCAA
gonna find out anyway?
Mr. Lucky has his picture
in the paper this morning.
Now, we have to show the NCAA
that we are taking action,
or they'll never get off our tails.
lam telling you, Hayden,
they're bloodsuckers.
Well, what do you want me
to do, Howard?
I want you to suspend Luther
for 30 days.
What?
Oh, no, Howard,
I can't do that.
I mean, I just told him that
all this stuff was behind us.
I mean, you know how
he reacts to bad news.
I mean, if you wanna punish
him, let me break his nose,
or cut out his liver,
'cause this is gonna kill him.
I'm sorry that this is going to upset
him, but it's him or the school.
Well, I can't suspend Luther!
I mean,
why can't we suspend somebody who
doesn't actually contribute anything?
You know, somebody
who's not gonna be missed.
Somebody like you, Howie.
Are you gonna take care
of this or am I gonna do it?
No, no, no,
I'll do it, I'll do it.
I know it won't be easy,
but it's better
coming from a friend.
Morning, Luther.
Have a good week.
(CLEARING THROAT)
I didn't know Howard was here.
I was just loading up the game tapes from Saturday.
You wanna look at them?
In a minute.
In a minute.
What's the matter?
Nothing. Nothing. There's just
something I got to tell you. That's all.
This is something good
or something bad?
Well, it depends on
how you look at it.
Oh, God!
Oh, Luther.
Come on, I don't want you
getting all upset here, now.
I don't want you jumping to any conclusions.
Just let me explain this to you.
Something's happened.
Nothing has happened.
Something's happened. You wouldn't be
talking to me if something hadn't happened.
Luther, nothing has happened!
Now just get a grip on yourself,
and come on now, don't interrupt me,
and just let me explain to you
in as calm a way as I can
what has happened.
Something's happened?
Look, I was just talking
to Howard.
Now, as it turns out,
your winning that steak
at the Touchdown Club
Saturday night
was an extremely minor
NCAA rules violation.
Okay?
And the reason it was a violation,
'cause you bet against the team
and you won something for it.
Uh-huh.
Now, I'm gonna have to
suspend you for 30 days, huh?
That's it.
That's all there is to it,
there's nothing more than that. No big deal.
Okay?
Now, you and I have been
together 20 years, huh, bud?
Now look at it this way,
I mean,
I want you to look at this suspension
as something positive, you know,
not something discouraging
or disappointing.
I mean, look at all the things
you can do in 30 days, Luther.
You can travel,
you can read a book, you can do all
sorts of things you never done before.
(STAMMERING) When does
this officially begin?
Well. Now.
(EXCLAIMS)
The sooner we get it started,
the sooner it's gonna be over with.
Okay.
I guess I'll just
go on home now.
Are you sure
you're all right with this?
(STAMMERING)
Yeah. I'm fine. I...
You explained it to me.
I'm fine.
I mean, it's only a suspension.
There's nothing more to it than that.
Right.
I'll see you in 30 days,
right?
Okay.
Hey, Luth, how you doing?
I'm fired!
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
What the hell?
CHRISTINE: Who is it?
It's Luther.
Luther, it's 4:00 in the morning.
What are you doing here?
I saw your light was on.
I need to talk to you, Hayden.
Can't it wait?
Actually, I don't need to talk to you.
I wanted to use your typewriter.
What is going on?
Oh, hi, Christine.
I didn't know you were here.
She got to spend the night.
You know, it was kind of special, Luther.
Oh, that's nice. You two go on back to bed.
You won't even know I'm here.
He's going to type?
I don't know.
Luther, what are you doing?
Typing my résumé.
Why?
Hayden fired me.
I didn't fire you, I suspended you.
You know that.
I know what you said today,
and I've been thinking about it, Hayden.
I know what's gonna happen.
You'll go 30 days without me and find out
you don't need me and I'll be out of a job.
Oh, Luther, Hayden isn't going to
find out that he doesn't need you.
Oh, I know he thinks he isn't
gonna find out he doesn't need me.
But I know what I do.
And I know he doesn't need it.
He does too.
Hayden,
tell Luther you need him.
He knows I need him.
But he needs to hear it.
I need you, Luther.
Come on, Luther,
you know I need you.
Who's gonna run the defense
if ll don't have you?
Yeah, but where are you gonna find
another guy to hold a team to 44 points?
Look, I've been at this game
longer than either one of you.
I know what's
gonna happen.
I predicted we'd lose
the game today
and I predicted
I'll lose my job.
Should I put on some coffee?
Okay.
No, no, 'cause I'm predicting
he's not staying that long.
Luther, I don't know
how to tell you this.
You're not fired.
You're not gonna be fired.
You're gonna be with me
until you die,
which could be tonight
unless you get out of here.
Maybe I should make
some breakfast.
Hey, can I type while I eat?
You don't need to type!
The resume's not gonna look very professional
written on the back of a program.
Am I talking at a frequency
he can't hear?
You know, Luther,
you know what your problem is?
You don't think
you're a good coach.
You think the only reason you got
this job is because we're friends.
Well, that's where
you're wrong, Luther.
We're not friends?
Yes, of course, we're friends.
But that's not why you got the job.
You got the job because you know
what you're doing. I mean, you must.
You certainly don't have it
because of your personality.
Well, Hayden.
I mean, look at him.
He's got a terrible attitude.
You got no self-confidence.
And you're annoying.
Hayden!
Well, he is annoying.
My God, it's 4:00 in the morning.
Aren't you annoyed?
Well...
Well, of course, you're annoyed.
She's annoyed. We're both annoyed.
You're annoying!
God, you got a negative thing
going all the time,
you're always predicting
the team's gonna lose.
I don't know who'd wanna
be around a man like that
unless he were a good coach.
And that's all the proof I can give you, Luther.
I don't know what else I can say
that's gonna make you
feel any better.
Would you be willing to say all
that in a letter of recommendation?
(EXCLAIMING)
Morning, Coach.
Daub.
I brought you fresh coffee.
(COUGHING)
Thanks.
How you feeling?
Terrible.
My back's all twisted up
half the night,
my neck is stiff from
sleeping on this football.
Maybe tonight you can sleep
at your place again.
Oh, no, I can't.
Luther's gonna be there.
I mean, he's there every night.
I can't take
any more of this, Dauber.
Have you seen the paper yet
this morning?
Why?
I don't wanna make you
feel any worse,
but there's this kind of weird
ad I think you should see.
"Job wanted.
"Ex-defensive coordinator from
large state university in Minnesota
"seeks work of any kind.
“Call LN.D. at KL5-2884
any time, day or night."
You think that
could be Luther?
I think that there's
a good chance it's Luther.
These are his initials and
that's his phone number, Daub.
That's what I was thinking.
Ah.
Well, I don't understand it.
I mean,
I just don't believe it.
He actually thinks
he's not coming back.
I mean, what makes a person think
that the worst is always gonna happen?
I think they call it
general anxiety disorder.
Huh?
Yeah. We've been studying this
in my Psychology class.
See, chronic negative thinking
is actually just
a defense mechanism.
The subject believes
that if they always think
that everything is
gonna turn out bad,
then they'll never be hurt
or disappointed.
Wow, that's interesting, Daub.
What do you do
for a person like that?
I'll know next week.
Dad?
Hey, Kelly.
Hi, Daub.
Hi, look, I'm sorry
to bother you so early...
Are you all right?
You look terrible.
Yeah, thanks. See, I was
afraid I was hiding it.
Did you spend the night here?
Yeah, I did.
It's a real long story, honey.
I don't want to go into it.
What do you want?
Something with
you and Christine?
No.
Hey, Kelly, don't make me
be rude, babe, all right?
I've just had a hard couple of days.
That's all. What do you need?
I just wanted to know
what was going on with Luther.
You saw the ad, didn't you?
No, I saw Luther.
How come you fired him?
I didn't fire him.
Well, he told me you did.
See? Now he's telling
my daughter I fired him.
He's going around
telling everybody I fired him.
Why would I fire him
when it's just so much easier
to run him over with a car?
Coach, Coach.
No, I mean it. I've had it.
I'm gonna put a stop to this once and for all!
What are you going to do?
I don't know.
I don't know,
but I got to do something.
I'm telling you, he is making himself
nuts, and he is making me nuts!
No, Coach, actually
Luther is not making you nuts.
You're allowing him
to make you nuts
by playing
the role of the victim.
See, you've got to realize
that you have the power
to protect your own space and
your own personal boundaries.
You are in control.
But not for long, if I have
to listen to that cow flop.
Okay, where was he when you saw
him when he told you all this?
At the Touchdown Club.
Shari and I went there
for coffee this morning.
Oh, okay.
Maybe he's still there.
Yeah, he's still there.
He was our waiter.
I'm glad to see your dad's no
longer suppressing his rage.
Yeah. Taking Psych
this semester, Daub?
Yeah.
I was thinking
about majoring in it,
but it's clear on
the other side of campus.
Good morning.
How you doing, Nick?
How about
that table right there?
Great. Thanks.
NICK: Luther.
LUTHER: Right.
How are you folks
this morning?
Good, how are you?
Well, I'm a little nervous.
This is my first day as a waiter.
I used to be an assistant football
coach, but I got fired Monday.
Oh, really?
Yeah. 34 years of coaching
and now I'm starting
my life over again.
Gee, we're sorry to hear that.
(HESITATING)
They just up
and fired you, huh?
Yeah. They're calling it a suspension,
but I know what it really is.
It's the Wally Pipp story.
The what?
Wally Pipp.
Wally Pipp played first base
for the New York Yankees.
He got the flu one day and they
brought in Lou Gehrig to replace him.
Told Wally he'd be back in the
line-up as soon as he got better.
Two thousand games later,
Lou Gehrig was in the Hall of Fame,
Wally Pipp was in Cincinnati.
They can call it what they want to call
it, but I've been Pipped.
What do you want to eat?
Why don't we just have coffee?
Nobody seems to be
very hungry this morning.
Just coffee?
Yeah.
Better go get some more.
Hey, Coach.
Hey, Nick.
Luther around?
Yeah. He's in the kitchen.
Boy, I feel terrible you had
to fire him over that contest.
Nick, I didn't fire him.
I suspended him.
Can I just talk to him
for a minute, please?
Oh, sure. I'll go get him.
Excuse me.
Aren't you Hayden Fox?
Yeah.
Well, I hope when you've been coaching 34
years, somebody cans you.
Hi, Hayden.
Would you like to try to explain
what it is you are doing here?
You're mad, aren't you?
No, I'm thrilled. I mean,
now I can get a good table.
You just can't believe that
you're coming back, can you?
Yeah, I believe it.
No, you don't.
I mean, if you did,
then you'd be fishing,
or you'd be home reading
that book we talked about.
If this is going to
make you mad, I'll quit.
No, 'cause quitting
isn't going to do any good.
'Cause three hours from now,
you'll be back here
or you'll be working
at some car wash.
Luther, when are you gonna stop
taking every little problem
and turning it into
a major disaster?
'Cause I gotta
tell you,
there's gonna be worse stuff than
this gonna happen to you in your life.
Why? What have you heard?
Luther, get in the car.
Where are we going?
We're gonna go see
Howard Burleigh.
I'm gonna see about
getting you reinstated.
Obviously you're not
gonna be happy until I do.
What about the NCAA?
To hell with the NCAA!
You sure
this is gonna work?
'Cause if you are,
I'll just tell Nick I'm quitting.
Tell Nick you're quitting.
All right. Nick?
Yeah, Luther?
I'm taking my break.
Mrs. Thorkelson,
if Howard Burleigh is in his office,
tell him to get his butt down here!
I want to see him right away!
Boy, is Howard going to be
surprised to see me.
(PHONE BUZZING)
Coach here.
No, Mrs. Thorkelson, you don't
have to use the word "butt."
Get Howard down here,
will you?
What are you gonna
say to him?
Whatever it takes.
I know you. You're the Fox.
Boy, I sure did
miss this place.
You know, they say you
can't go home again, but...
Oh, Luther, shut up.
Right.
Mrs. Thorkelson
said you wanted to...
What's he doing here?
I want Luther back
and I want him back now.
We've been through all this.
Howard, it's not working.
I can't take it anymore.
I mean, you're afraid of a
little NCAA investigation?
Well, I'm not afraid.
Let them investigate. Let them do all
the investigating they want to do.
They want to
take a look at my files.
Let them take a look at my files.
I got nothing to hide.
Now what do you say, Howard?
I say this is my decision.
Not yours.
And I forbid it.
Yeah, I'm sorry,
I didn't hear that last part.
It sounded to me like
you said you forbid it.
That is what I said.
You challenging me,
Howard?
Are you challenging me?
I'm the Head
Football Coach, damn it!
Well,
I'm the Athletic Director!
Well, I'm 6'4"!
Well,
I'm the Athletic Director!
Fine. You're the
Athletic Director? All right.
You coach the team
on Saturday. I quit.
What?
You were a coach,
weren't you, Howard?
I was the golf coach.
You know that.
You're bluffing, Hayden.
Am [? You hired me
to run this program.
Now, either I get to decide
who's suspended and who's not
or I don't want the damn job!
Is this working out
like you had wanted?
Luther, you stay out of this.
This doesn't concern you.
I'm out of here, Howard.
I am history.
HOWARD: You're not serious.
He's not serious.
Oh, I've never been more serious
about anything in my life.
Are you guys interested in
a little lake-front property?
'Cause my cabin is
on the market as of today.
You're actually gonna quit
over a thing like this?
Yes, I am. Yes, I am.
Now for the last time,
do I get Luther back or don't I?
There's nothing I can do.
Fine.
I'll leave my keys
with Mrs. Thorkelson.
I'm sorry, Luther.
I didn't expect that.
Well, you're not gonna
let him do this, are you?
I'm trying to do
what is best for the school.
If all he can think about is
himself, that's his problem.
He wasn't thinking about himself,
he was thinking about me.
Well, he did real well
for you. Now you're both out.
Wait a minute, Howard.
Before you start throwing around
words like "both" and "out,"
could we talk about this?
What is there to talk about?
Well, this whole thing started
because I bet against the team.
I was being negative.
I get like that sometimes.
And, see, that was
the whole problem.
And then you suspended me.
Which was the right thing to do,
but then I panicked and that...
(STAMMERING)
You see, I was negative again.
And see, I got all upset,
and I got Hayden upset.
He got you all upset.
Now, you're the only one left who still has a job.
Well, I don't know
what I can do about that.
Well, you can get him back.
But he won't come back
unless I lift your suspension,
and I can't do that.
I'm not asking you to. All we have to
do is convince Hayden I'm okay with it.
But it's not okay with you.
Oh, yeah.
It's okay with me now.
See. Hayden got mad
because all the time I was
upsetting him and everything,
about being negative,
but I'm over all that now.
I'll never be negative again.
I'll never bet against the team again.
I'll probably never win
another steak,
but I'll never bet
against the team again.
(SIGHING)
Well, I guess
it's worth a try.
And I can tell him that you're
okay with the suspension?
Hey, he wanted me to go on a vacation.
I'm out the door right now.
Tell him I'm taking a book.
I just hope
you're right about this.
Hope I'm right?
I know I'm right.
Howard,
you have to think positive.