Chip 'n' Dale Rescue Rangers (1988–1990): Season 2, Episode 19 - Prehysterical Pet - full transcript

♪♪

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

♪ SOMETIMES
SOME CRIMES ♪

♪ GO SLIPPIN'
THROUGH THE CRACKS ♪

♪ BUT THESE TWO
GUMSHOES ♪

♪ ARE PICKIN' UP
THE SLACK ♪

♪ THERE'S NO CASE TOO BIG ♪

♪ NO CASE TOO SMALL ♪

♪ WHEN YOU NEED HELP,
JUST CALL ♪

♪ CH-CH-CH-CHIP
'N' DALE'S ♪

♪ RESCUE RANGERS ♪



♪ CH-CH-CH-CHIP
'N' DALE ♪

♪ WHEN THERE'S DANGER ♪

♪ NO, NO, IT NEVER FAILS ♪

♪ ONCE THEY'RE INVOLVED ♪

♪ SOMEHOW WHATEVER'S WRONG
GETS SOLVED ♪

♪ CH-CH-CH-CHIP
'N' DALE ♪

♪ RESCUE RANGERS ♪

♪ CH-CH-CH-CHIP
'N' DALE ♪

♪ WHEN THERE'S DANGER ♪

♪ NO, NO, IT NEVER FAILS ♪

♪ THEY'LL TAKE THE CLUES ♪

♪ AND FIND THE WHERES
AND WHYS AND WHOS ♪

♪ CH-CH-CH-CHIP
'N' DALE ♪

♪ RESCUE RANGERS ♪



♪ CH-CH-CH-CHIP
'N' DALE ♪

♪ WHEN THERE'S DANGER ♪

♪ CH-CH-CH-CHIP
'N' DALE ♪

CAREFUL, MEN.
THAT'S FAR ENOUGH.

I WAS RIGHT.

IT'S DEFINITELY
THE THIGHBONE

OF A GIANT
SMELLASAURUS.

NOBODY MOVE.

THE SLIGHTEST
DISTURBANCE COULD
SHATTER THIS SPECIMEN.

OK, WHO DID THAT?

WE MUST'VE HIT
AN UNDERGROUND
POCKET OF GAS.

IT'S A DINOSAUR EGG!

IT MUST'VE BEEN UNCOVERED
BY THE EXPLOSION.

THIS COULD BE
THE GREATEST FIND
IN HISTORY!

WE MUST GET THIS BACK
TO THE MUSEUM AT ONCE!

CAREFUL
WITH THAT EGG, MEN.

IT'S MILLIONS
OF YEARS OLD.

I CAN'T WAIT TO
WRITE A 50-PAGE
RESEARCH PAPER ABOUT IT.

LOOK WHAT
FOLLOWED ME HOME.

I TRIED TO MAKE HIM GO AWAY,
BUT HE JUST INSISTED
ON COMING WITH ME.

OH, NO!
NOT ANOTHER ONE.

ISN'T HE CUTE?

[ARF ARF]

YOU'VE GOTTA STOP
BRINGING ANIMALS HOME
ALL THE TIME.

WE DON'T HAVE
ROOM FOR--

AWW, HE LIKES YOU.

CAN I KEEP HIM?
HE WOULDN'T BE ANY TROUBLE.

THAT'S WHAT YOU SAID
ABOUT THE FROG THAT TRIED
TO EAT ZIPPER.

AND THE BABY KITTEN THAT USED ME
FOR A SCRATCHING POST.

I CAN'T HELP IT THAT
ANIMALS LIKE ME.

LIKE THE GOLDFISH YOU SAID
THAT FOLLOWED YOU HOME?

A PET IS A BIG
RESPONSIBILITY, DALE.

ESPECIALLY WHEN
HE'S BIGGER THAN YOU ARE.

I'LL TAKE CARE OF HIM
EVERY MINUTE OF THE DAY.

AND I'LL SEE TO IT THAT
HE NEVER MAKES A MESS.

WELL, ALMOST NEVER.

DALE, THIS PUPPY
HAS A COLLAR

WITH A TAG ON IT.

HE MUST BELONG
TO SOME LITTLE BOY OR GIRL.

YOU TAKE HIM BACK
WHERE YOU FOUND HIM,
RIGHT AWAY.

AW.

[SPEAKING DINOSAUR]

YIKES!

[SPEAKING DINOSAUR]

DROP IT
RIGHT NOW.

OH, BOY!

A LIZARD!

I BET THAT YOU'D REALLY LIKE
TO STAY WITH ME, WOULDN'T YA?

[GIRL]
RUFFLES!
HERE, RUFFLES!

RUFFLES! YOU'RE BACK!

I MISSED YOU SO MUCH.

IT MUST BE GREAT
TO HAVE A PET.

HEY, WHY DON'T YOU--

COME BACK, YOU LIZARD!

I WANT YOU FOR
MY SCIENCE PROJECT.

UH-OH.

THIS WAY, PAL.

YOU'RE TRAPPED NOW.

OW!

MAMA! [CRIES]

I GUESS HE WANTED YOU
FOR A PET.

SAY, YOU'D
MAKE A GREAT-- NO.

THEY'D NEVER
LET ME KEEP YOU.

YOU BETTER GO
HOME NOW, OK?

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
GO HOME. SHOO!

GOSH, HE'S CUTE.

READ MY LIPS.

GO HOME!

I GUESS I'LL NEVER
SEE HIM AGAIN.

AAH!

LOOKS LIKE
THE COAST IS CLEAR.

WE'RE GONNA HAVE
TO HIDE YOU IN MY ROOM.

COME ON, DALE,
SHAKE YOUR TAIL!
WE'VE GOT A MISSION.

YOU'D BETTER GO
WITHOUT ME.

YOU ALREADY MISSED BREAKFAST.
ARE YOU OK?

I DON'T FEEL GOOD.

I'LL PROBABLY BE OK
AFTER YOU'RE GONE--

I MEAN, BY THE TIME
WHEN YOU GET BACK.

WELL, ALL RIGHT, IF YOU'RE
SURE YOU'RE OK.

I HOPE I'M NOT COMING
DOWN WITH SOMETHING TOO.

YIPPEE!
NOW I CAN PLAY
WITH MY NEW PET.

WHEN I SAY "ROLL OVER,"
YOU ROLL OVER.

THAT'S GREAT.

NOW, TRY IT AGAIN.
ROLL OVER.

COME ON. ROLL OVER.

ROLL OVER.
ROLL OVER. ROLL--

[CRASH]

THAT'S A GOOD IDEA.

I'LL TEACH YOU
TO FETCH A STICK.

NOW, FETCH.

NOW YOU TRY IT.

NOW, WAIT A MINUTE.

THERE'S SOMETHING
WRONG HERE.

I BET YOU'RE HUNGRY.
WAIT HERE.

I DON'T KNOW
WHAT LIZARDS EAT,

SO I BROUGHT
A LITTLE OF EVERYTHING.

GOSH,
YOU ARE HUNGRY.

I'D BETTER GET
SOME MORE FOOD.

THIS IS THE LAST OF THE--

WHOA!

OH, NO!

YOU GOT BIG!

[CHIP]
PHEW! WHAT A MISSION.

UH-OH. THEY'RE BACK.

REMEMBER THAT TRICK
I TAUGHT YOU?

FREEZE!

I DON'T KNOW WHAT WENT WRONG
WITH THE RANGER PLANE.

DALE!

SHOULDN'T YOU BE
IN BED?

I SLEPT OUT HERE
ON THE SOFA.

40 WINKS SOUNDS LIKE
JUST THE TICKET.

WHOA.

YEAH.

IT'S A BIT LUMPY.

AHH.

WE HAD TERRIBLE PROBLEMS
WITH THE RANGER PLANE
ON THE WAY BACK.

YEAH, A FAULTY WING FLAP
WAS CAUSING IT TO ROLL OVER.

DON'T SAY THAT.

DON'T SAY WHAT?

ROLL OVER.

AAH!

AH!
AH!

IT'S A DINOSAUR!

NO, IT'S NOT!
IT'S MY PET LIZARD.

YOU DUMMY.

IT LOOKS JUST LIKE
THE PICTURE OF THE DINOSAUR
IN YOUR COMIC BOOK.

HE'S TOO SMALL
TO BE A DINOSAUR.

MAYBE HE'S
A BABY DINOSAUR.

IN ANY CASE,
WE'LL HAVE TO FIND OUT
WHERE HE CAME FROM.

CAN I KEEP HIM
AS A PET UNTIL THEN?

I SUPPOSE SO.

OH BOY! I'M GONNA
NAME HIM STEGGY.

BUT YOU'LL HAVE TO BE
RESPONSIBLE FOR HIM.

I WILL! I'LL FEED HIM,
TEACH HIM TRICKS--

BUT ALL HE WANTS TO DO
IS WATCH TV

AND LOOK AT
COMIC BOOKS.

SOUNDS LIKE
THE PERFECT PET FOR YOU.

THIS IS A REAL MYSTERY!
THERE HAVEN'T BEEN ANY DINOSAURS
FOR MILLIONS OF YEARS.

OH YEAH?
THEN WHAT DID HE DO?
DROP OUT OF THE SKY?

WE INTERRUPT
THIS SECOND-RATE MONSTER MOVIE
FOR A NEWS BULLETIN.

SCIENTISTS AT THE CITY
MUSEUM OF NATURAL HISTORY

TODAY REPORTED
A DRAMATIC DISCOVERY--

A DINOSAUR EGG
IN PERFECT CONDITION.

-WAIT!
-COME BACK!

YUCK!

OH, NO!

DON'T WORRY, MATES.

I'LL SAVE HIM.

OK, START WORRYING.

COME ON.

ARE YOU
ALL RIGHT?

RIGHT AS RAIN,
GADGET LOVE,

AND TWICE AS WET.

I WONDER WHY HE RAN OFF
LIKE THAT IN THE FIRST PLACE.

I DON'T KNOW, BUT HE'S GONNA
HAVE TO LEARN TO BE CAREFUL.

YEAH, HE COULD GET HURT.

LOOK OUT!

WOW! WE COULD HAVE
BEEN FLATTENED.

NO KIDDING!
IT'S A GOOD THING THAT--

[RANGERS]
HE TALKED!

YES, I'VE LEARNED
YOUR LANGUAGE

BY STUDYING
YOUR EARTH LITERATURE.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
"EARTH LITERATURE"?

HE MEANS MY COMIC BOOKS.

ZOWIE!

THEN YOU'RE NOT REALLY
A DINOSAUR AT ALL.

I AM A DINOSAUR, BUT I COME
FROM ANOTHER PLANET

IN A GALAXY FAR, FAR AWAY.

WE HAVE LIVED THERE HAPPILY
FOR MILLIONS OF CENTURIES.

HIDDEN IN THE CLEARINGS
OF OUR SWAMP-LIKE ENVIRONMENT,

WE HAVE BUILT CITIES
TO HOUSE OUR POPULATION,

WHERE WE HAVE LEARNED TO LIVE
TOGETHER IN PERFECT HARMONY.

THERE HAVE BEEN NO WARS,
NO FIGHTING ON OUR PLANET
FOR THOUSANDS OF YEARS.

FOR WE HAVE LEARNED
TO BE CONTENT WITH WHAT WE HAVE.

AND THROUGH THE YEARS,
OUR ARTISTS AND SCIENTISTS

HAVE CONTRIBUTED
TO OUR BUSY SOCIETY,

MAKING OUR LIVES
MEANINGFUL AND COMPLETE.

WE HAVE EVEN STUDIED
THE STARS OF THE SKY

AND DEVELOPED
OUR OWN SPACE PROGRAM

TO EXPLORE THE PLANETS
OF THE GALAXIES AROUND US.

ONE PLANET IN PARTICULAR
HAD THE REQUIREMENTS

NECESSARY TO SUPPORT
OUR LIFE FORMS--

THE PLANET YOU CALL EARTH.

MILLIONS OF YEARS AGO,

WE LAUNCHED
A FLEET OF SPACECRAFTS
TO TRAVEL TO THIS PLANET.

WE MAINTAINED RADIO CONTACT
WITH THEM UNTIL SOON
AFTER THEY LANDED HERE.

THEN, WITHOUT WARNING,
ALL COMMUNICATIONS CEASED.

WITH THE FAILURE
OF OUR SPACE PROGRAM,

WE WERE TOO FEARFUL
TO CONTINUE EXPLORING
THE PLANETS

AND ABANDONED
FUTURE SPACE RESEARCH.

BUT I WAS DETERMINED
TO FIND OUR WHAT HAPPENED
TO MY ANCESTORS.

SO, OUTFITTING
OUR LAST SPACESHIP

WITH A LARGE SUPPLY
OF FOOD PACKETS,

I TRAVELED ACROSS THE UNIVERSE
TO SEE FOR MYSELF.

MEANWHILE, AT THE NATURAL
HISTORY MUSEUM,

MY SPACESHIP HAS BEEN
MISTAKEN FOR A DINOSAUR EGG.

THE DINOSAUR EGG
THEY FOUND IS A SPACESHIP?

ZOWIE!

JUST A FEW
MORE ADJUSTMENTS.

I WANT TO THANK YOU
FOR SAVING ME

FROM THAT EVIL VILLAIN
WHO TRIED TO CAPTURE ME.

THAT'S WHAT
RESCUE RANGERS ARE FOR.

BESIDES,
NOW THAT WE'RE FRIENDS,

WE CAN PLAY A WHOLE LOT
OF NEAT GAMES.

PERHAPS. I'M AFRAID
YOUR GAMES OF FETCH
AND ROLL OVER

ARE A BIT TOO SIMPLE
FOR ME.

THE RANGER PLANE
IS READY TO FLY.

GREAT.
WHERE DO I SIT?

I SEEM TO BE GAINING
SOME UNWANTED POUNDS.

IMAGINE HOW BIG YOU'LL BE
WHEN YOU'RE FULL-GROWN DINOSAUR.

BUT I WAS ALREADY FULL-GROWN
WHEN I LEFT MY PLANET.

[ALL] WHAT?

AAH!

YEOW!

YIKES!

SORRY ABOUT THAT LANDING.

THAT'S ALL RIGHT.
I'M STARTING TO GET
USED TO IT.

OW!

ANYBODY SEEN STEGGY?

IT MUST'VE ESCAPED
FROM THE REPTILE EXHIBIT.

THIS WAY, MEN.

THEY MUST BE
AFTER STEGGY!

WE'VE GOTTA
FIND HIM FIRST.

RIGHTO, MATE.
BUT WHERE?

ZOWIE.

SO THIS IS WHAT
YOU TURNED INTO.

STEGGY! WE'VE GOTTA
GET OUT OF HERE!

I FOUND OUT
WHAT HAPPENED
TO THE LAST COLONY.

SOMETHING HERE ON THE EARTH
MADE THEM GROW
TO GIANT SIZE.

AS THEIR BODIES
GREW BIG,

THEIR BRAINS
GREW SMALL.

THEY GOT, UM...

WHAT DID THEY GET?

DUMB?

YEAH, THAT'S IT. DUMB.

AS THEY GOT BIGGER,
THEY GOT...

WHAT WAS THAT AGAIN?

GOSH. STEGGY'S
BRAIN MUST BE
GETTING SMALLER.

FIRST THEY GOT DUMBER,

THEN THEY GOT--
NO, WAIT.

FIRST, BIGGER, THEN--
NO, THAT'S NOT RIGHT.

YOU'D BETTER STAY HERE
WITH DALE, STEGGY,

WHILE WE TRY TO FIND
YOUR SPACESHIP.

RIGHT. I'LL STAY
HERE WITH--

WHAT WAS
YOUR NAME AGAIN?

I SWEAR, DR. PILDOWN,
IT WAS A BIG LIZARD,

LIKE A BABY DINOSAUR.

WELL, IF THIS IS A JOKE,

I'LL HAVE YOU PUT IN CHARGE
OF THE CHILDREN'S GROUP TOURS.

ANYTHING BUT THAT, DOC.

IF YOU FIND ANYTHING,
I'LL BE IN MY LAB.

ALL RIGHT, STEGGY.
ROLL OVER.

GOSH! YOU CAN'T REMEMBER
ANYTHING EXCEPT THE TRICKS
I TAUGHT YOU.

YOU USED TO THINK

THOSE GAMES
WERE TOO SIMPLE.

OH, ALL RIGHT,
STEGGY. FETCH.

NO, STEGGY,
DON'T FETCH!

HUH?

WE GOT TO GET
OUT OF HERE FAST!

SOMEBODY MIGHT HAVE HEARD
THOSE BONES FALLING.

OH, NO!

WAIT TILL DOC PILDOWN
GETS A LOAD OF THIS.

HE WON'T GET AWAY
THIS TIME.

I'D BETTER GET HELP.

KEEP AN EYE ON HIM

TILL I GET BACK
WITH DR. PILDOWN.

IF YOU WERE A SPACESHIP,
WHERE WOULD YOU BE?

OUTER SPACE?

SOMEBODY'S COMING.

I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE
WHAT'S IN THAT EGG.

[GUARD] WILL DR. PILDOWN PLEASE
COME TO THE DINOSAUR ROOM?

THIS HAD BETTER
BE IMPORTANT.

COME ON, ZIPPER.
LET'S GO!

NOW THAT WE'RE UP HERE,
HOW DO WE GET INSIDE?

SHH.

HMM.

IT'S NO USE, MATES.
WE'RE SURE TO MAKE NOISE

BREAKING INSIDE
THIS BABY.

AAH!

GOOD WORK,
MONTY.

WOW! ALL THIS
INSIDE AN LITTLE, OLD EGG.

I'LL BET THIS
IS EASY TO FLY.

-AAH!
-AAH!

I CAN'T FIND THEM ANYWHERE.

I GUESS I'LL HAVE TO
SAVE STEGGY ON MY OWN.

AFTER ALL,
HE IS MY RESPONSIBILITY.

IF YOU'RE RIGHT,

THIS WILL MAKE ANOTHER
TERRIFIC RESEARCH PAPER.

I SWEAR, DOC,
WE'VE CAUGHT IT
THIS TIME.

AND IT'S EVEN BIGGER
THAN I REMEMBERED.

OH, NO!

[BURP]

STEGGY! REMEMBER THE TRICKS
I TAUGHT YOU?

FREEZE!

A STEGOSAURUS HAS A BRAIN
THE SIZE OF A WALNUT.

YOU SHOULD BE SO LUCKY.

YOU'VE ROPED ONE OF
OUR DINOSAUR MODELS!

YOU SEE?
NOTHING BUT PLASTER.

WE'LL GET HIM,
DOC!

ROLL OVER, STEGGY!

THIS IS INCREDIBLE!

JUMP, STEGGY!

I'VE GOT IT!
I'VE GOT IT!

ARE YOU ALL RIGHT,
MONTY?

NEVER BETTER.
BEEN TALLER, HOWEVER.

WE'VE GOTTA
GET OUT OF HERE!

[DR. PILDOWN]
THE CREATURE'S
IN MY LAB!

THERE'S A BUNCH
OF GUYS CHASING US!

DON'T YOU EVER
STOP EATING, STEGGY?

HE'S PROBABLY
MISSED HAVING FOOD
FROM HIS OWN PLANET.

HEY!

THE GROWTH PROCESS
IS REVERSING.

YEAH, AND HE'S
GETTING SMALLER.

IT MUST BE THE FOOD
FROM MY OWN PLANET
THAT KEEPS ME SMALL.

HEY, YOU'RE GETTING
SMARTER, TOO.

HE WON'T GET AWAY
THIS TIME, MEN.

AAH!

THAT'S IT, STEGGY, SHOW THEM
HOW A DINOSAUR FLIES.

I DON'T THINK I'LL WRITE THAT
RESEARCH PAPER AFTER ALL.

WELL, IT'S 83 KAZILLION MILES
BACK TO MY PLANET.

I'D BETTER GET MOVING
BEFORE RUSH HOUR.

MY PEOPLE
WILL BE INTERESTED

IN LEARNING WHAT REALLY HAPPENED
WITH THEIR ANCESTORS.

OHH.

-OH, UH, DALE?
-YEAH?

I'D LIKE IT VERY MUCH
IF YOU'D COME AND LIVE
WITH ME ON MY PLANET.

OH YEAH?

BUT I'M NOT ALLOWED
TO HAVE ANY PETS.

[LAUGHTER]

WELL, MAYBE HE COULDN'T
HANDLE THE RESPONSIBILITY.