Charmed (1998–2006): Season 3, Episode 13 - Bride and Gloom - full transcript

Oh, Billy,
please don't leave me alone!

Guess who.

Is it really over?

Yes, Sally May, it is.

Really and truly?

I'm here now.

And as long as I'm with you,
everything is gonna be A-okay.

- Promise?
- Promise.

You're my hero, Billy!

And I think you're swell, Sally May.

- Cole?
- Phoebe, hi.



Just a little trick I learned
from the demon of illusion.

- But what...?
- Am I doing in here?

I wasn't sure how you'd react.

I thought this might be a safer way
of letting you know I was back...

...for good.

So I had a really
good time tonight, Justin.

Did you? I mean, really?

The reason I ask is,
you seemed kind of quiet.

No. It's just that, you know,
I've got a lot on my mind

with Piper getting married
and everything.

Sure.

Of course, if I was the paranoid type,
I'd think it was because of me.

Don't be ridiculous.

So are we still on
for lunch tomorrow?



Yeah, pick me up at 1?

- It's a date.
- Okay.

- Good night.
- Night.

Hey.

Gee, Prue, it's only 9:00
and your date's already over?

How very Disney of you.

Justin has a meeting
early in the morning.

I see. So did you decide

if you're going to invite
him to the wedding?

No, I'm stalling.

I mean, you know, he's a nice guy.

He's sweet, but he's just so
predictable, you know.

There's no mystery,
no savoir-faire.

You know, besides...

...a wedding invite definitely
makes a statement.

- That he can tie a bowtie?
- No, that the relationship is serious.

You know,
that it's going somewhere.

All that built-in romance, mingling
with the family, hidden tensions.

All the more reason to have
a nice, simple, private wedding.

Nice try, mister.

Okay, wedding planner
tomorrow at 11.

No getting out of it,
no orbing out of it, nothing.

Don't even try it.

I don't know. I just don't want her

to set herself up
for a big disappointment.

How do you have a normal wedding
when a ghost will be presiding

- and the groom's dead?
- Leo, don't even try and figure it out.

All right? It's the Cinderella complex.

Every girl goes through it.

I've been dreaming
of this day my entire life.

- Piper's wedding?
- No, mine.

I mean, I'm the oldest.
I'm supposed to do everything first.

I'm supposed to talk first,
and get braces,

and get a boyfriend,
and find a husband.

Hey, Prue?

Can I borrow your lipstick?

- What?
- Lipstick, I'm out. Do you mind?

Sure, knock yourself out.

You're welcome!

Speaking of Phoebe, isn't it
time to let her off the hook?

I mean, she came clean about Cole.

Leo, you can't just pretend
to vanquish a demon

and then two months later say,
"Gee, guys, I'm sorry, I didn't."

I know, but for what it's worth,

I don't think she wants him
back in her life anymore.

Maybe not, but that doesn't mean
he's not gonna try and kill us again.

Dantalian.

Priestess Dantalian.

Were you successful?

She's as beautiful
as you said she'd be.

You're certain this
has touched her lips?

Absolutely. I watched her all night.

Not to be ungrateful...

...but what do you get out of making
Prue Halliwell my wife?

I'm a humble servant
of The Source, Zile.

I get nothing...

...other than the benefits
we all reap

whenever good is turned evil.

Still, for all the unions
you've consecrated,

it seems you should get something.
Especially for this one.

There is a spoil...

...that intrigues me.

The Halliwell Book of Shadows
is said to be

the most magical of all tomes.

The witches' Book of Shadows?

That shouldn't be too hard to get.

This one is.

Evil can't touch it.

Although turning Prue evil

should turn her sisters
and their book evil, as well.

Their magic's interconnected.

Well, then, I'll get it for you myself,

as a token of my gratitude.

First things first.

Getting the witch here
so I can perform the ceremony.

That's what this potion is for.

Kiss her and it paralyzes her.

After I bind you in marriage,

she'll fall into a deep sleep, where
the transformation to evil will occur.

Okay, so the more traditional
the better, as far as I'm concerned.

The Wedding March starts
and I come down the stairs...

So no flower girl?

I don't know. Do I?

Unless you wanna ask Kate
down the street.

Great idea, maybe she can
bring some of her fairy friends.

Or trolls, even better.

Trolls?

Right, trolls.

Our father's side
of the family is very short.

- Right, let's skip the flower girl.
- Right.

Well, I think we should at least
dress the banister with garlands.

Maybe even carry the floral theme
all the way to the altar.

How many guests
are you planning on?

Let me think, 50, 60?

Sixty? Like who?

Well, there's all the
people from P3, friends,

and Darryl, and Dad, Mom.

Mom?

Piper, I don't really think
that you can count her.

- We'll have to, if she's going to eat.
- Trust me, she won't be eating.

I thought your mother passed on.

Right, she did.

I just meant I hope
she's there in spirit.

You're right, that doesn't count.

Now, have you thought about
what hors d'oeuvres you'd like,

by any chance?

Pigs in a blanket.

Leo, I was... I was hoping
for something a bit more elegant!

I'll get that.

Excuse us.

We still need to place
the ice sculpture.

Hello? Oh, hi, Justin.

What is the matter with you?
Why are you doing this?

Because this is a disaster
waiting to happen, that's why.

Well, keep that up and it will be.

Piper, I love you.

And I want nothing more for you
than to have your dream wedding.

But you are kidding
yourself with this.

We don't need wedding planners,
we just need us.

You may not need
wedding planners, but I do.

I don't wanna have
to worry about anything.

Therefore, if I have
to fight a demon in the morning,

I know that the flowers
will still be there on time.

It's not the flowers
I'm worried about, it's the guests.

As in how do we explain
everything to them?

I mean, a whitelighter marrying
a witch is hardly traditional.

Obviously.

Okay, Justin,
I'll meet you there. Bye.

- Hey, Phoebe...
- I'm running late for school.

- Do you want a ride?
- Isn't Justin picking you up for lunch?

His car broke down
so I'm meeting him there.

And I thought that...

...we could talk, you know?

Try and put this whole Cole
situation behind us.

I gotta go.

Okay, tell me the truth.

Do you think I'm overdoing
it with the wedding stuff?

Hello?

Okay, why is Phoebe going
to school without her books?

Okay, why is Prue not answering
Piper's question?

Maybe because she doesn't want

both of her sisters
not speaking to her.

Okay, I have to go meet Justin.

- Can I have my lipstick back?
- What lipstick?

The one that you borrowed
last night at the club.

Wasn't me.

Right, I must have gotten
you confused with another Piper.

Okay, you have fun with what's going
on here, because it looks great.

Okay, bye.

Cole?

Phoebe.

I knew you'd know
where to find me.

That is for ruining my favourite movie.

And, oh, yeah, my life too!

- Phoebe...
- I don't wanna hear it, Cole.

I'm over you. I want nothing
to do with you anymore.

- I don't believe that.
- Oh, yeah?

Believe it, because
if I ever see you again,

I'm gonna do what I should
have done a long time ago,

which is vanquish your sorry ass.

Apparently, distance hasn't exactly
made the heart grow fonder.

Phoebe, wait.

Hey! Look, I took a huge risk coming
out in the open and contacting you.

The least you can do
is hear me out!

I've been hiding this whole time,

shimmering from realm
to realm to realm

to keep The Source from realizing
you didn't vanquish my sorry ass.

You're the only one
who knows I'm alive.

Actually, that's not true.

I couldn't keep lying to my sisters.
I had to tell them.

Okay.

That's okay. I understand.

As long as you didn't tell Leo.

For God's sake, why didn't you
just put an ad in the paper?

- Tell the whole damn world!
- You know, maybe I should have!

I risked my life for you,
Phoebe, my soul.

I've put myself in more danger
coming back here

than you could possibly imagine.

Because I wanna try and figure out
a way to make this work between us.

Good and evil can't work together.

- We did before.
- I learned from my mistakes.

So did I.

Phoebe, I can suppress
my demonic half

just like I suppressed
my human half before we met.

I can be good. You've seen that.

And if you know I can,
then why can't we be together?

It's too late.

- Hey. Sorry about my car.
- Hey.

- Thanks for meeting me here.
- Oh, that's okay. It's not a...

...problem.

What?

Nothing.

You know, I really
should sell that old thing

but, I don't know.
I kind of like having something

not so predictable
in this day and age.

- Know what I mean?
- Right. So...

...you don't think
of yourself as predictable?

- Me?
- Pardon me.

- Beringer, private reserve.
- Yes, thank you.

Predictable? Hardly.

Right.

Hey, Justin.

- Hey.
- What are you doing here?

I'm picking up Prue for lunch.

Piper?

- Is something wrong?
- I'm not sure.

- What's up?
- Where's Prue?

I don't know.
At the restaurant, I guess.

Supposedly meeting Justin.

- No, I told her I'd pick her up here.
- Okay, so you didn't call this morning

and tell her that your car broke down
and you'd meet her there?

No.

Oh, no, no.
I have to work this afternoon.

Well, so your photographs are
a little fuzzy. Call it "avant-garde."

How important can it be?

What?

Can I ask you a favour?

Sure.

Last night when we kissed
goodbye it was...

...I don't know, not great.

Yeah.

How about we try it again?

See if we can't do it a little better?

Come on.

What's the worst
that could happen?

Where am I?

I can't move.

My apologies.

It's true.

Every bride is beautiful
on her wedding day.

- Find her?
- Not yet.

- We're screwed.
- Not yet.

- Leo, what did you find out?
- Nothing.

Okay, now we're screwed.

Nothing on the map,
nothing in the Book.

Leo, somebody must
know something.

The Elders support
your shape-shifting warlock theory,

but they can't get
a clear read on the situation.

Wait. So Prue's vanished
from your radar

- and something's jamming theirs?
- Something like that.

But she can't be dead.

They'd be able to sense that,
no matter how evil is interfering.

Okay, then what's going on?
What are we up against?

Something powerful enough
to keep us from finding her.

Well, you knew as your powers
grew, evil's would too.

Yeah, so powerful that
we can't figure out who they are,

let alone how to fight them?
That sucks.

All right, what we need to figure out
is why a warlock wants Prue alive.

Well, it can't just be for her powers.

I mean, they wouldn't need
to keep her alive to get them.

Unless it's an upper-level
warlock which wants...

All of our powers.

But we still have the same problem,
no idea how to find her.

It's too bad you vanquished
that demonic bounty hunter.

Could have helped.

Right.

Where are you going?

I have a hunch.

Wait for me.

Shall we begin?

I'm ready.

I hope so.

In the beginning, we were damned.

And through damnation,
we found freedom,

power and purpose.

As I unite you today...

...I remind you of those gifts.

And in your union...

...may these gifts increase...

...so your powers may grow
in the service of...

...evil.

So be it.

How long before her
transformation is complete?

Sundown.

Can you wait that long?

For the power
of the Charmed Ones?

I can wait a few hours.

Let me be the first
to congratulate you.

Why?

Because I'm tired of bestowing
great power on others.

The Halliwell Book of Shadows
is the key to unbelievable power,

for me.

Evil will spread from
this sister to the other two,

and from them to the Book,

and once the Book is evil,
it'll be mine.

And I will be unstoppable.

But know this.

I will enjoy killing all of you.

Cole?

Cole?

Please, if you can hear me, l...

I was beginning to think
I'd never see you again.

I'm not here because of us.

I need you to help me. If you do, it
doesn't change anything between us,

you have to know that.

- I'm listening.
- Prue was taken...

...by a warlock.

- Do you know which one?
- We think he's a shape-shifter.

But the weird thing is, nobody
from our side can get a read

- on where he's hiding her.
- That doesn't make sense.

Warlocks don't have
that kind of power.

He must be working
with somebody that does.

Certain dignitaries have
the power to shield their activities.

Demonic judges, dark priests,

anyone who needs
privacy for rituals.

What kind of rituals?
To accomplish what?

It's hard to say. It could be anything.

They may want your book.
We all want your book.

- Really?
- I wanted the Book...

...at first.

Well, how can we find
out who wants it now?

I could check around, but I'd risk
demons finding out I was still alive.

I'm sure there's still
a huge bounty on my head.

I want my sister back.

No matter the cost?

I want my sister back.

I'm doing this for you.

Know that.

Now I'm really confused.

Me too.

I...

I don't... I don't know
where that came from.

Okay.

I better go.

Listen, if you don't
hear back from me...

...I got caught.

I thought you said there
was nothing in the Book.

Well, now there's just
a whole bunch of weirdness in it.

Look.

Hemlock killing spell?
That doesn't belong in here.

But it does have possibilities.

Piper.

I'm sorry. I don't know what I was...

Piper?

In here, somehow.

- You blinked.
- I did not!

- Only warlocks do that.
- Piper, you did it.

- Hey.
- Where have you been?

Brainstorming.
How's it going here?

Your sister's blinking.

l... I'm... I'm sorry, what?

Okay, I admit it was definitely weird.
But it was kind of fun.

I was... I was in there,
and I was thinking about the kitchen.

And then, suddenly, boom!
Here I was.

That is so cool.

Except that it's a warlock's power.

So what? They're always
trying to get one of ours.

It's about time we get one of theirs.

- Try it, Pheebs.
- Okay, what do I do? Just think?

And blink.

Catch us if you can!

Have you tried it yet, Leo?
It's a real head rush.

Do you realize how serious this is?

You're blinking,
the Book is changing.

Maybe we're blinking
because of the Book.

The Book is changing
because of you.

It is an extension of you.

I should care about that.

But I don't.

This is what I was afraid of.

Whoever's got Prue
is somehow reaching you too.

Okay, Leo, I can tell
this really upsets you,

but I gotta tell you I really like this
whole "think and it happens" deal.

I mean, just think of the time
we could save not chanting.

Piper, Phoebe,
you have to fight this.

Or we could answer the door.

For Prue's sake, stop!

Don't tell me what to do.

Phoebe, I need your help.

I am so tired of helping people.

So glad you're home. We have some
floral sketches we'd like you to see.

Now's not really a good time.

They're welcome to come in, Leo.

I've revisited the dinner menu, Piper,
and you are going to be thrilled.

I have some dynamic choices
that l...

I want pigs in blankets.

It's nice to see a bride
who still has a sense of humour

this close to the big day.

No, I want pigs in blankets.

Marie seems very scared.

I always had her pegged
as an ice queen.

What a great idea.

Now, there is a freezing
power with kick.

Have you guys lost your minds?

Oh, Leo, get onboard.

Whatever it is, this is fabulous.

You can't imagine
the freedom, the power.

Phoebe, that is evil talking.
You have to fight it.

- What did you ever see in him?
- I don't know.

He is kind of a stick-in-the-mud,
isn't he?

Oh, another great idea.

May I?

Be my guest.

All right, think about the power of...

Look at all the fun
we've been missing.

And this is just the beginning.

See you, Leo.

Just the beginning.

Oh, you know, it's your wedding.

Shouldn't the first kill be yours?

This is too easy. It's boring.

I wanna do something bigger.

Count me in.

You know, if what's happening
to us is happening to Prue...

Then the power of three
can be truly amazing.

We have to find her.

But first, we need to clean house.

I'm sorry. What were you saying?

You're fired.

Oh, no.

What are we gonna do
with the stick-in-the-mud?

Wait. I think we can have
some fun with it.

What happened to Craig and Marie?

Oh, they flew right out of here.
It scared the hell out of them.

Leo, we need to find Prue.

Good, Phoebe, focus on that.
It'll help you resist the evil.

The only thing we're resisting
is the desire to rip you to pieces

and have you for lunch.

But if you help us find Prue,
we'll leave you alone...

...for the moment.

Oh, Leo, ignore them.
What do they know?

They're backing a losing team.

They're revoking my assignment.

What? They can't do that.

You haven't done
anything wrong yet.

You did. You gave in to evil.

You've relinquished your right
to a whitelighter.

I'm sorry.

- Well.
- Oh, no. He's gone.

- We're free.
- Yes.

No more obeying the rules,
considering the consequences,

none of that crap.

- Time to find Prue and go for broke.
- Where are you going?

Well, I can't wreak havoc
dressed like this.

- Phoebe.
- Cole.

- You're okay.
- Yeah.

Barely.

- Any demons spot you?
- Just one.

- Oh, no.
- No worries.

He won't be telling anybody anything.

The big, bad Belthazor strikes again.

Not anything I'm proud of.

Why not?

You should be.

Phoebe, if what I found out is true,
Prue's in serious trouble.

She's been forced to marry
a warlock.

Figures that bitch
would steal Piper's thunder.

You don't understand.

A high-level priestess
named Dantalian

is rumoured to have married them.

And she's got the power to turn
Prue evil, and turn you evil too.

That's what's happening here.

So?

Isn't that the way you want me?

No.

That is not how I want you to be.
It's not how I want us to be.

Our only chance is if we're both...

...good.

Love is love.

There's no such thing as evil love.
It's just gratification, lust.

You know what, Cole?

Your human half is kind of preachy.

I think I want Belthazor back.

He's not coming back.

Oh, no?

I want Belthazor!

That's more like it.

Phoebe, what are you doing?

Dantalian is coming for your book.

You better be ready.

- What's going on in here?
- Nothing, unfortunately.

- I heard voices.
- Oh, did you?

I had a premonition.

Must've gotten pretty loud.

I guess.

We gotta go.

The high priestess that has Prue,
supposedly she's coming here.

High pr...?

Must've been a hell
of a premonition.

It's time.

That was easy.

Too easy.

Where's our sister?

I can help you.

I can teach you evil.

You're new at it. You don't know
how to realize its full potential.

I don't know, I think
we're getting the hang of it.

Wanna see?

Where's Prue?

Kill me, and you'll never
see her again.

So maybe we should
just torture you instead.

Why don't you just shatter her hand
and see what happens.

Last chance.

Fine.

Now, the really weird thing is
we could do that to the other hand.

And then go down to your feet...

Actually, we could work up piece
by piece, all the way to her head.

Where is Prue?

I just couldn't leave like that, Piper.

What's going on?

Well, you just helped her to escape.

That's what's going on.

Smash him.

Bastard.

Death alone will not suffice,
my dear bride.

Not anymore. Not after this.

Welcome to my hell.

So, what are we
supposed to do now?

I don't know, kill innocents?

No, I mean about Prue.

How are we supposed to find her
without the Book?

Shouldn't you be mourning the loss
of your beloved Leo?

Phoebe, I'm serious.
That was one pissed-off priestess,

and if she kills Prue, she takes
the evil power of three along with her

- and we won't stand a chance.
- Good point.

We have to find Prue.

Wait a minute.
We're warlocks, right?

We should be able to blink
wherever we want.

But we don't know where to blink to.

We don't have to know where.

Just to who.

To Prue. I mean, isn't that how
Leo's orbing power worked?

Yeah, but his power was jammed.
He couldn't find her.

That's because he was good.
And we're evil.

"Through this book, weave this spell
Create the pain of heaven to hell

May she suffer..."

Are we there yet?

- Prue.
- Too late.

- I've got the Book.
- Yeah, well, you know,

it takes a while to learn how to use it.
Trust us.

How about in the meantime,
I freeze your head and shatter it?

I may not be powerful enough
to fight you yet, but they are.

- Prue.
- Hey, hi. You don't look so good.

Oh, but that's a great dress.

Zile, Prue, eliminate them.

Prue, ignore her. Come on.
Come with us. We're your sisters.

I'm his wife, not your sister.

All right, I'll take that as a no.

Okay, we have to figure out a way
to get Prue on our side and fast.

How about we get her a divorce?

Don't wanna shatter
the wrong sister, now, do you?

- I love you.
- You too.

Welcome to planet Narcissus.

Wait a minute.
Cole said that evil can't love.

- Cole?
- Never mind.

The point is, she didn't say,
"I love you too."

She's the warlock. Freeze her!

I'll shatter her.

- Hurry.
- No!

Zile!

What's going on?

I think we're back.

All of us.

The Book is back too.

Let's go do something good with it.

Powers of light, magic of right
Cast this blight into forever's night

Well, that was the wedding from hell.

Although I guess I was the first
to get married, after all.

- Oh, no. Leo.
- What?

We killed him.

Oh, Leo.

Thank God you're okay.

Actually, it had more to do
with what you guys did.

Vanquishing Zile broke the bond and
reversed all the evil you had done.

I just hope the wedding planners
don't remember what we did to them.

Unfortunately, they will.

But I doubt they'll believe
what happened.

And unfortunately, you will.

Oh, yeah.
Leo, sorry we killed you.

It's okay, Phoebe.

It wasn't the real you.
Or you, Piper.

Wasn't it?

I mean, on some level,
it was me. I felt it.

They didn't just plant evil
inside of me...

...or us for that matter.

There had to be something there
for them to turn to begin with.

That doesn't make you evil, Prue.

You have to choose
to be evil voluntarily.

Well, I gotta admit it.

- It was kind of fun.
- Phoebe.

Well, it was fun for a while.

I mean, to be able to do whatever
we wanted, whenever we wanted

with no consequences.

My fianc? being shattered
into a gazillion pieces

is a kind of a consequence.

Thank you.

Still, I kind of understand
what Phoebe's saying.

Wait, you do?

Am I detecting a thaw in our rift?

All I'm saying is if evil weren't
enticing, why would there be any?

I mean, you know, to pretend
that we're never attracted to it is...

It's like pretending
that it just doesn't exist.

Something tells me Cole's
name is about to be brought up.

Look, I definitely do not like the fact
that you lied to us

about vanquishing him,
but I have to admit,

after taking a trip down the dark side,
I sort of understand it a little bit better.

The problem now is that I realize
that Justin is just so boring.

Well, scratch one name
off the wedding guest list.

Actually, scratch them all.

I cave. Our lives are just
way too bizarre

to have any sort of normal wedding.

I don't know what I was thinking.

Phoebe, by the way,
you never mentioned

where you got that premonition from.

- What premonition?
- The one that told us

about Dantalian.

The one that saved our butts.

Right.

You know, something tells me
you wouldn't believe me

if I told you anyway.

So let's just say I got in touch
with my evil side.

Something that I will never do again.

- How did it go?
- Everything's back to normal again.

- Good.
- Yeah.

Good.

It's not enough, is it?

What I did doesn't change your mind
about us, does it?

- No.
- Why not?

- It's too complicated.
- Don't give me that.

If nothing else, let's at least be honest
with each other. We owe that.

I love you.

And I will always love you.
Nothing can change that.

It's just...

The temptation, it's too much.

And I can't take that risk
for me or my sisters.

Phoebe, I'm telling you,
I'm not evil anymore.

Maybe not on the surface.

And maybe not even in your heart.

But somewhere inside of you...

...you'll always be.

And you can't ever change that.

Goodbye.

I'm not giving up, Phoebe.

I'm not going away.