Cash Register (2018–…): Season 1, Episode 17 - Ramzi in Love - full transcript
Ramzi falls in love with Esti but doesn't know how to express his love.
What an exciting day!
Today I enlisted a new cashier
from the Ethiopian nation.
Ethiopians are not a nation.
They're an ethnic group.
They're Jews.
They're part of the Jewish people.
You didn't let me finish, so...
you don't know what I was going to say.
Okay, sorry.
-So I'll say it again.
What an exciting day!
Today I enlisted a new cashier
from the Ethiopian nation,
which is not a nation,
it's an ethnic group,
and it's part of the Jewish people
in the State of Israel.
Rags,
these are the candy shelves,
but none of that really matters.
It's knowledge that you'll acquire.
My motto as manager is,
"Smile the shift,"
or as you people say...
When I was in the army
I commanded over two soldiers
of Ethiopian ethnic origin,
both of them were so lovely,
they always said
this beautiful sentence in Amharic...
Which means, "Smile,
and life will smile at you."
It's "Shut up, you moron,"
in Amharic.
Dude, what is this place?
What makes our supermarket special
is its human fabric... -Big Boss.
Of human beings. -Big Boss.
-This is our all-purpose employee,
the best in the Middle East.
Meet Ramzi.
Hi, I'm Esti.
Ramzi.
Ramzi?
Hmm... what was the question?
I asked if you think she's pretty.
-Who?
Esti, the new cashier.
Do you think she's pretty?
She's pretty... yes...
I don't know, I wasn't impressed.
My mother's pretty too,
so is my grandmother.
You're good looking too.
Everyone is.
What, did it look like I was impressed?
No, right?
.. He's usually very...
and he... talks...
Maybe it's their holiday,
that's why he can't...
Hezi, do the cousins
have some holiday today?
A good manager must ensure
not too many employees
of the same kind.
It's about diversifying,
as much as possible
and one of each is best.
Why do I say that?
They have a holiday,
the supermarket comes to a standstill,
what do you say to the customers?
"Sorry, the supermarket's closed
"because my employees are shooting
in the air in some village"?
"Issachar Bounty"
Checkout
"Ramzi's in love"
I didn't know you're a chocolate man.
-No, they're carobs.
It just looks like.
No, the cashier, the cashier.
She turns you on, huh?
Anatoly, what kind of talk is that?
I look at the whole supermarket,
Esti happens to be
in the angle of the whole.
Hezi too. Does that mean
I'm in love with Hezi?
No. -Rubbish.
When I look at Esti
do I hear violins? Perhaps.
When she walks by me,
oes my heartbeat drown out the PA system?
You could say so.
But saying I'm in love..
Come on...
You're way off base, Anatoly.
I didn't even notice she's here
until you came.
Then why are you pricing your hand?
"The whole..."
For years my folks have been
wanting me to bring home a bride,
but it's not that easy.
Because whoever will be
with Ramzi Abed Ramzi
must understand that no matter what,
she will always be second place.
Excuse me, third place.
No, fourth.
First place is...
the supermarket, obviously.
Second place -
the customers.
And third place?
"Issachar Bounty" in Netzer Sireni.
I'm on call there.
The shy ones don't eat the horse.
-What? -It sounds better in Russian.
Ramzi, you can't stifle love!
You Israelis are too laid back,
you're like panda bears.
Anatoly, no pressure, really.
What will be will be.
"What will be will be", Ramzi?
You gotta pounce, like a tiger.
Woo her savagely.
'Coz if you don't -
your best friend will come along,
Stas Petushkin,
ravage her, give her twins,
Yafim and Olga, then lie to you:
"I didn't know you want Marina,"
I told him that on Novy God!
I don't really know how to...
start, you know...
Can I tell you a secret? -What?
Well...
You've never been with a woman, Ramzi?
-Sshhh... Anatoly.
It's alright, Ramzi.
Why didn't you tell me before?
It's not a disease!
I understand.
Don't worry, Anatoly's with you.
"To the...
"prettiest cashier...
"in the supermarket."
Ramzi, tell me,
how do you feel about Esti?
I don't know exactly.
-Try, are you...
attracted to her?
Do you love her?
Turned on by her?
-It's hard to put into words. -Try.
You know when..
there's a shortage
of whole wheat pasta?
You go into the storeroom
and right behind the forklift
you see the last box of whole wheat pasta
left over from last Passover?
I'll get something off the Internet.
I think you got the wrong checkout!
This is my checkout.
Nice.
Get this.
Oh my, so fancy...
"I only have one thing to say to you:
You're the most beautiful in the world.
"From your secret admirer."
A real Cyrano de Bergerac.
Classic.
An admirer - perhaps,
secret - not so much.
Mistakes in Hebrew,
the smell of chicken thighs,
the refined handwriting...
It could only be one person.
Morning.
Oh, Marilyn Monroe...
Oh oh oh, what a nice cut...
-Yes.
Juicy.
-Very juicy. Tasty too?
Kohava, Masha's nine months pregnant,
what are you doing?
I'll tell you what,
or should I call you "secret admirer"?
You know, Kohava, it's... a mistake.
-Sshhh...
There are no mistakes in love.
But I didn't write the note.
It was Ramzi.
Ramzi has the hots for me?! Fine.
-Not for you, Kohava.
Esti. —Esti? -Esti.
—The new girl? -Yes.
I just helped write the note.
Sorry. -Ah, okay.
Kohava!
-Fine, no means no...
It's a fact,
men are scared of strong women.
Even in the wild,
who do the lions go for?
The fast, strong gazelle
with the career and opinions, or the...
weak, new bambi who just arrived
and likes Idan Reichel songs?
She loves me,
she loves me not.
Well?
-"Well" what?
You're taking advice from Anatoly?
You got a romantic problem,
come to Nissim.
No, it's okay, Nissim.
Listen to me, it'll only do you good.
If you really want Esti,
you have to rescue her. -From what?
From... dangers that are lurking.
-What dangers are lurking for Esti?
Oh! That's where I come in.
Let's say...
Let's say this is Esti. -Okay.
-And this is me.
This is me.
And I start pestering her, okay?
"How are you, cutie?"
"How are you, naughty girl?"
-Oy vey!
Then the knight in shining armor comes,
shoves me out of the way
and wins over the princess' heart.
-Ah! -Ah...
I invented the knight move
during my days of debauchery in the army,
when I was a secular sleaze.
Those days won't return,
and that's a good thing.
Abomination!
What was that cute NCO called?
I've been a butcher for 20 years
and I've never seen a cut of meat like you.
Are you talking to me?
You see another cut of meat around here?
I have a 30 minute break,
how about we go to the freezer
and warm up? -What?
Ramzi, no... that hurts... Ramzi!
Naomi?!
-Nissim, what's with the foul mouth?
Is that any way to talk to a woman?!
-Naomi, no!
You're hurting me,
it's the hand that slices! Naomi!
Talk to her again like that,
I'll cut out your liver for Bolognese.
Ramzi, Ramzi!
I wanted to intervene,
as we planned.
But Naomi, the devoted storeroom employee,
got ahead of me.
Naomi is a source of pride
to the Butch family.
What family?
-Butch, Butch.
That's Naomi's last name.
Oh... I have "Naomi Levi."
Must be her husband's name.
Did Naomi hurt you?
-No way!
I just pretended
so that Ramzi could play the hero.
I studied theater for three years.
-Then why the frozen peas?
This? I'm the consummate actor.
Even after the play I like
to stay in character.
Any news with the Queen of Sheba?
No, not really.
I think I'll just be honest,
share my feelings with her.
Nice. -Yes.
-Excellent idea.
If you want her to laugh in your face.
-Are you an idiot, Ramzi? -What?
Honesty?
Women don't want honesty,
they want danger.
Lies, bad guys,
anything but honesty.
Bad guy?
You ever see an honest lion
in the wild?
A woman wants James Dean.
A man who will take her
on a motorcycle into the horizon.
Once she shows signs of distress,
you get on your machine
and show her who the real John Travolta is.
That's it! Go, go, go!
-I'm... I'm not sure.
Ramzi, don't trip out on me!
-It's just not me...
Ramzi, if you don't get over there
I'll tell Shira that you haven't
taken a day off in two years. Go!
Thanks, Naomi.
-Sure thing, sweetcakes.
Why should you clean alone
if I can help with my machine?
Naomi, what was that about?
-What?
Don't "what" me!
You cut Ramzi off.
He was going to clean up the sauce
and pick Esti up on his machine.
You think Esti would go
with that wimp?! -Who's a wimp?!
Hey, hey! -No, Anatoly...
-I know we're all upset,
but let's not forget
that we're one big family and...
You listen to me, you fool!
Esti only gets on the heavy machines.
Not kiddie cars like yours.
Then I have news for you, Missie.
Ramzi's machine is way better than yours.
-Really, no need, Nissim.
You wanna check it out?
Me and Ramzi, head to head,
machine to machine?
Really, there's no need.
Any time, anywhere.
The loser - gives up on Esti.
Done.
Tonight, 8 p.m.
The snack aisle.
Excuse me,
I can't... at 8 p.m.
I'm closing the checkout.
-8:30 p.m. then.
I'm closing the storeroom...
-Then 9 p.m. -Carton bin.
Then when you're done!
She's so funny,
work in the carton bin never ends.
"Issachar Bounty"
Okay, the battle for Esti begins.
Are you sure this is a good idea, Nissim?
-Do you want Esti or not?
You want her to think you're a man.
-Yes, alright.
You know the rules of "Chicken."
You drive towards one another,
the first one that veers - loses.
The winner gets Esti.
Clear? -Clear.
Shouldn't we ask Esti first?
-Ramzi, stop asking questions.
Clear.
Okay, to your marks.
Good luck, Naomi.
If you need...
if you have a problem,
just wave, I'll be there.
-Shut up.
Okay.
On your...
On your marks,
get set,
go!
Rematch.
-No, enough of this.
Where are you going, Ramzi?
-I'm not doing this anymore.
Ramzi, get over here!
-Don't "Ramzi" me.
Hey, a tiger doesn't give up.
Do you want Esti or not?
More than anything. -So?
-But enough with all your methods!
Be a knight, be a bad guy, duke it out,
what is this, the Middle Ages?
I must be true to myself
and share my deep feelings with Esti.
The way I arranged the diapers
in the storeroom in the shape of a heart,
how I like the... gentle way
she turns the egg carton
to find the barcode.
How my heart burst
when she first uttered my name
with her soft lips...
Ramzi?
Esti?
That was the most beautiful thing
anyone ever said about me.
Forgive me for acting strange
this week.
Would you like to...
have dinner with me?
Grilled cheese, on me.
I'd like that.
Want some chocolate?
I'm not crying like a girl.
I take all the credit.
My method. -Of course.
Get that out of the way.
Well?
Well what?
How did it go with Esti?
-Oh! That...
Yes, it was...
it was really very good.
Amazing, really.
We laughed and... we talked,
and we ate grilled cheese,
then her boyfriend came
and he had grilled cheese too.
What was that?
Her boyfriend?-Yes, well...
just a small detail
that she forgot to mention.
It happens, no?
She apologized,
I told her it's alright.
We kept talking and... laughing,
then they started kissing
a little too much perhaps,
tlhen I got up and paid for us all,
then I went to the bus stop,
I went to Jisr to prepare
for another wondrous morning at...
"Issachar Bounty" Yavne.
Today I enlisted a new cashier
from the Ethiopian nation.
Ethiopians are not a nation.
They're an ethnic group.
They're Jews.
They're part of the Jewish people.
You didn't let me finish, so...
you don't know what I was going to say.
Okay, sorry.
-So I'll say it again.
What an exciting day!
Today I enlisted a new cashier
from the Ethiopian nation,
which is not a nation,
it's an ethnic group,
and it's part of the Jewish people
in the State of Israel.
Rags,
these are the candy shelves,
but none of that really matters.
It's knowledge that you'll acquire.
My motto as manager is,
"Smile the shift,"
or as you people say...
When I was in the army
I commanded over two soldiers
of Ethiopian ethnic origin,
both of them were so lovely,
they always said
this beautiful sentence in Amharic...
Which means, "Smile,
and life will smile at you."
It's "Shut up, you moron,"
in Amharic.
Dude, what is this place?
What makes our supermarket special
is its human fabric... -Big Boss.
Of human beings. -Big Boss.
-This is our all-purpose employee,
the best in the Middle East.
Meet Ramzi.
Hi, I'm Esti.
Ramzi.
Ramzi?
Hmm... what was the question?
I asked if you think she's pretty.
-Who?
Esti, the new cashier.
Do you think she's pretty?
She's pretty... yes...
I don't know, I wasn't impressed.
My mother's pretty too,
so is my grandmother.
You're good looking too.
Everyone is.
What, did it look like I was impressed?
No, right?
.. He's usually very...
and he... talks...
Maybe it's their holiday,
that's why he can't...
Hezi, do the cousins
have some holiday today?
A good manager must ensure
not too many employees
of the same kind.
It's about diversifying,
as much as possible
and one of each is best.
Why do I say that?
They have a holiday,
the supermarket comes to a standstill,
what do you say to the customers?
"Sorry, the supermarket's closed
"because my employees are shooting
in the air in some village"?
"Issachar Bounty"
Checkout
"Ramzi's in love"
I didn't know you're a chocolate man.
-No, they're carobs.
It just looks like.
No, the cashier, the cashier.
She turns you on, huh?
Anatoly, what kind of talk is that?
I look at the whole supermarket,
Esti happens to be
in the angle of the whole.
Hezi too. Does that mean
I'm in love with Hezi?
No. -Rubbish.
When I look at Esti
do I hear violins? Perhaps.
When she walks by me,
oes my heartbeat drown out the PA system?
You could say so.
But saying I'm in love..
Come on...
You're way off base, Anatoly.
I didn't even notice she's here
until you came.
Then why are you pricing your hand?
"The whole..."
For years my folks have been
wanting me to bring home a bride,
but it's not that easy.
Because whoever will be
with Ramzi Abed Ramzi
must understand that no matter what,
she will always be second place.
Excuse me, third place.
No, fourth.
First place is...
the supermarket, obviously.
Second place -
the customers.
And third place?
"Issachar Bounty" in Netzer Sireni.
I'm on call there.
The shy ones don't eat the horse.
-What? -It sounds better in Russian.
Ramzi, you can't stifle love!
You Israelis are too laid back,
you're like panda bears.
Anatoly, no pressure, really.
What will be will be.
"What will be will be", Ramzi?
You gotta pounce, like a tiger.
Woo her savagely.
'Coz if you don't -
your best friend will come along,
Stas Petushkin,
ravage her, give her twins,
Yafim and Olga, then lie to you:
"I didn't know you want Marina,"
I told him that on Novy God!
I don't really know how to...
start, you know...
Can I tell you a secret? -What?
Well...
You've never been with a woman, Ramzi?
-Sshhh... Anatoly.
It's alright, Ramzi.
Why didn't you tell me before?
It's not a disease!
I understand.
Don't worry, Anatoly's with you.
"To the...
"prettiest cashier...
"in the supermarket."
Ramzi, tell me,
how do you feel about Esti?
I don't know exactly.
-Try, are you...
attracted to her?
Do you love her?
Turned on by her?
-It's hard to put into words. -Try.
You know when..
there's a shortage
of whole wheat pasta?
You go into the storeroom
and right behind the forklift
you see the last box of whole wheat pasta
left over from last Passover?
I'll get something off the Internet.
I think you got the wrong checkout!
This is my checkout.
Nice.
Get this.
Oh my, so fancy...
"I only have one thing to say to you:
You're the most beautiful in the world.
"From your secret admirer."
A real Cyrano de Bergerac.
Classic.
An admirer - perhaps,
secret - not so much.
Mistakes in Hebrew,
the smell of chicken thighs,
the refined handwriting...
It could only be one person.
Morning.
Oh, Marilyn Monroe...
Oh oh oh, what a nice cut...
-Yes.
Juicy.
-Very juicy. Tasty too?
Kohava, Masha's nine months pregnant,
what are you doing?
I'll tell you what,
or should I call you "secret admirer"?
You know, Kohava, it's... a mistake.
-Sshhh...
There are no mistakes in love.
But I didn't write the note.
It was Ramzi.
Ramzi has the hots for me?! Fine.
-Not for you, Kohava.
Esti. —Esti? -Esti.
—The new girl? -Yes.
I just helped write the note.
Sorry. -Ah, okay.
Kohava!
-Fine, no means no...
It's a fact,
men are scared of strong women.
Even in the wild,
who do the lions go for?
The fast, strong gazelle
with the career and opinions, or the...
weak, new bambi who just arrived
and likes Idan Reichel songs?
She loves me,
she loves me not.
Well?
-"Well" what?
You're taking advice from Anatoly?
You got a romantic problem,
come to Nissim.
No, it's okay, Nissim.
Listen to me, it'll only do you good.
If you really want Esti,
you have to rescue her. -From what?
From... dangers that are lurking.
-What dangers are lurking for Esti?
Oh! That's where I come in.
Let's say...
Let's say this is Esti. -Okay.
-And this is me.
This is me.
And I start pestering her, okay?
"How are you, cutie?"
"How are you, naughty girl?"
-Oy vey!
Then the knight in shining armor comes,
shoves me out of the way
and wins over the princess' heart.
-Ah! -Ah...
I invented the knight move
during my days of debauchery in the army,
when I was a secular sleaze.
Those days won't return,
and that's a good thing.
Abomination!
What was that cute NCO called?
I've been a butcher for 20 years
and I've never seen a cut of meat like you.
Are you talking to me?
You see another cut of meat around here?
I have a 30 minute break,
how about we go to the freezer
and warm up? -What?
Ramzi, no... that hurts... Ramzi!
Naomi?!
-Nissim, what's with the foul mouth?
Is that any way to talk to a woman?!
-Naomi, no!
You're hurting me,
it's the hand that slices! Naomi!
Talk to her again like that,
I'll cut out your liver for Bolognese.
Ramzi, Ramzi!
I wanted to intervene,
as we planned.
But Naomi, the devoted storeroom employee,
got ahead of me.
Naomi is a source of pride
to the Butch family.
What family?
-Butch, Butch.
That's Naomi's last name.
Oh... I have "Naomi Levi."
Must be her husband's name.
Did Naomi hurt you?
-No way!
I just pretended
so that Ramzi could play the hero.
I studied theater for three years.
-Then why the frozen peas?
This? I'm the consummate actor.
Even after the play I like
to stay in character.
Any news with the Queen of Sheba?
No, not really.
I think I'll just be honest,
share my feelings with her.
Nice. -Yes.
-Excellent idea.
If you want her to laugh in your face.
-Are you an idiot, Ramzi? -What?
Honesty?
Women don't want honesty,
they want danger.
Lies, bad guys,
anything but honesty.
Bad guy?
You ever see an honest lion
in the wild?
A woman wants James Dean.
A man who will take her
on a motorcycle into the horizon.
Once she shows signs of distress,
you get on your machine
and show her who the real John Travolta is.
That's it! Go, go, go!
-I'm... I'm not sure.
Ramzi, don't trip out on me!
-It's just not me...
Ramzi, if you don't get over there
I'll tell Shira that you haven't
taken a day off in two years. Go!
Thanks, Naomi.
-Sure thing, sweetcakes.
Why should you clean alone
if I can help with my machine?
Naomi, what was that about?
-What?
Don't "what" me!
You cut Ramzi off.
He was going to clean up the sauce
and pick Esti up on his machine.
You think Esti would go
with that wimp?! -Who's a wimp?!
Hey, hey! -No, Anatoly...
-I know we're all upset,
but let's not forget
that we're one big family and...
You listen to me, you fool!
Esti only gets on the heavy machines.
Not kiddie cars like yours.
Then I have news for you, Missie.
Ramzi's machine is way better than yours.
-Really, no need, Nissim.
You wanna check it out?
Me and Ramzi, head to head,
machine to machine?
Really, there's no need.
Any time, anywhere.
The loser - gives up on Esti.
Done.
Tonight, 8 p.m.
The snack aisle.
Excuse me,
I can't... at 8 p.m.
I'm closing the checkout.
-8:30 p.m. then.
I'm closing the storeroom...
-Then 9 p.m. -Carton bin.
Then when you're done!
She's so funny,
work in the carton bin never ends.
"Issachar Bounty"
Okay, the battle for Esti begins.
Are you sure this is a good idea, Nissim?
-Do you want Esti or not?
You want her to think you're a man.
-Yes, alright.
You know the rules of "Chicken."
You drive towards one another,
the first one that veers - loses.
The winner gets Esti.
Clear? -Clear.
Shouldn't we ask Esti first?
-Ramzi, stop asking questions.
Clear.
Okay, to your marks.
Good luck, Naomi.
If you need...
if you have a problem,
just wave, I'll be there.
-Shut up.
Okay.
On your...
On your marks,
get set,
go!
Rematch.
-No, enough of this.
Where are you going, Ramzi?
-I'm not doing this anymore.
Ramzi, get over here!
-Don't "Ramzi" me.
Hey, a tiger doesn't give up.
Do you want Esti or not?
More than anything. -So?
-But enough with all your methods!
Be a knight, be a bad guy, duke it out,
what is this, the Middle Ages?
I must be true to myself
and share my deep feelings with Esti.
The way I arranged the diapers
in the storeroom in the shape of a heart,
how I like the... gentle way
she turns the egg carton
to find the barcode.
How my heart burst
when she first uttered my name
with her soft lips...
Ramzi?
Esti?
That was the most beautiful thing
anyone ever said about me.
Forgive me for acting strange
this week.
Would you like to...
have dinner with me?
Grilled cheese, on me.
I'd like that.
Want some chocolate?
I'm not crying like a girl.
I take all the credit.
My method. -Of course.
Get that out of the way.
Well?
Well what?
How did it go with Esti?
-Oh! That...
Yes, it was...
it was really very good.
Amazing, really.
We laughed and... we talked,
and we ate grilled cheese,
then her boyfriend came
and he had grilled cheese too.
What was that?
Her boyfriend?-Yes, well...
just a small detail
that she forgot to mention.
It happens, no?
She apologized,
I told her it's alright.
We kept talking and... laughing,
then they started kissing
a little too much perhaps,
tlhen I got up and paid for us all,
then I went to the bus stop,
I went to Jisr to prepare
for another wondrous morning at...
"Issachar Bounty" Yavne.