C.O.P.S. (1988–1989): Season 1, Episode 8 - The Case of C.O.P.S. File #1: Part 1 - full transcript
Federal Agent Baldwin P. Vess arrives in Empire City to take Big Boss's criminal empire down. After being seriously injured by the Big Boss's henchmen, Agent Vess is taken to the hospital and given a cybernetic bullet-proof torso.
C.O.P.S
Central Organization of Police Specialists
Fighting crime in a future time.
Protecting Empire City from
Big Boss and his gang of crooks.
It's crime fighting time.
The case of C.O.P.S File 1.
Part 1
The facts have been
kept secret until now.
You are about to
witness the dramatic origin
of the world's greatest
crime fighting team.
It all began when the notorious
underworld kingpin known as the Big Boss
set his henchmen on a
spree of high tech robberies.
Here's how the caper came down.
I got the combination to open
every bank vault in Empire City.
Me and my jackhammer.
Eeny, meeny, miny, crook.
Stealing the cinch
with this new hook.
Yee-haw!
Let's do it, Buzz-Bomb.
Crimes are wasted.
(Buzz-Bomb laughs)
Right, Buzz-Bomb.
The tires are next.
If doing crime is
going to be this easy,
it'll take all the fun
out of being a crook.
(Laughs)
I'm glad I recruited
you, Dr. Bad Vibes.
Your inventions worked
even better than I expected.
Even Berserko, my numbskull
nephew, managed to grab some loot
without getting caught.
We sure made
monkeys out of the police.
Well, next time Berserko,
steal money, not bananas, eh?
Well, I'll let it
pass this time,
seeing that it was all just
a test of your evil talents.
A test?
Yeah. Dr. Bad Vibes,
I want you to invent
the most powerful crime
machine the world has ever seen.
By next week.
Something that big
will take at least a year.
Did I hear someone
refuse an order? My order?
I'll get right on it, Big Boss.
Well, excellent.
I've set up a new lab for
you in a secluded part of town.
The Big Boss's crooks
are having a field day, and
our local police can't seem
to get a handle on them.
Now, just a minute, Mayor Davis.
You can't blame the
Empire City Police.
The Big Boss has recruited
some new criminal genius.
That's why I've requested
federal assistance.
Federal assistance?
Federal agent B.P. Vess should be
arriving from Washington at any moment.
He's the best
criminologist in the country.
Thank you.
Ah, Agent Vess. So good
of you to come so quickly.
We've arranged a
reception party at City Hall.
If you don't mind, Mayor Davis,
I'd like to go right to
the scenes of the crimes.
I think we might have
our first solid lead.
Mayor Davis, I'll need a
police computer specialist.
Come in.
I'm Officer Tina Cassidy
from the Computer Division.
Here's the information
you requested, Mr. Vess.
Just give me a quick rundown.
Preliminary computer
scan indicates the flying drill
was manufactured at Contrex
Technologies, Incorporated.
I wonder how it fell
into criminal hands.
Here's a possibility.
Contrex just fired a brilliant scientist
for stealing top secret electronics.
He's known as Dr. Bad Vibes.
He could be the big
boss's new criminal genius.
Got an address on
this Dr. Bad Vibes?
819 Peripheral Plaza.
I like the way you
work, Officer Cassidy.
Same here, Agent Vess.
Why do we always get
stuck with the grunt work?
Hey, what's that
flatfoot doing here?
It's me.
This is the first honest
job we've had all year.
819 Peripheral Plaza.
We better phone the big boss.
This must be
Dr. Bad Vibes' place.
You got any change?
Yeah, plenty.
I just held up a gun machine.
Federal Agent Vess,
anybody home?
Hmm, the same flying
drills used in the robbery.
I'd say this Dr. Bad
Vibes is our man.
Laughing fish moving in storage.
All these boxes came
from the same place.
It's not much, but it's
worth investigating.
What do you mean the
police are wise to my plans?
Like I said, we was just
minding our business,
moving Dr. Bad Vibes' furniture.
But some fuzz in a
black and white shows up.
Well, forget about
that flatfoot for now.
Let's get to the lab and make
sure Dr. Bad Vibes is safe.
(Grunting)
"Laughing fish, moving in storage."
Hmm...
Good, the squad
car is still here.
Let's split before the
officer comes back.
Hail robber, yee-haw!
Heeelp, turbo! We're surrounded!
Hey look, those guys
have got to be nuts.
We better stop them
before they hurt somebody.
Let's do it.
10-40, officers in pursuit.
Repeat, 10-40.
Whoa!
Ouch!
Ah!
Ah!
Ha ha ha!
Whoa!
(Shouting)
Call for an ambulance.
10-18, request ambulance.
Repeat, 10-18.
It's B.P. Vance!
The federal agent brought
in to track down the Big Boss?
Whoa!
It's a miracle he's still alive.
It's a miracle my whole scheme
wasn't botched by your incompetence.
But Uncle Big Boss, we did good.
This snooping federal flatfoot
won't bother you no more.
The police never found out
where Dr. Bad Vibes is holed up
while he invents his
new crime machine.
And when he finishes,
Empire City will
crawl at my feet.
(evil laughter)
Agent Vess.
Your injuries are severe.
These research scientists from the
Overdyne Institute are your only hope.
Your body will heal,
but it'll take years before
you'll even be able to walk.
Unless...
- Get to the point, Mayor Davis.
Unless the doctors give
you a new electronic body,
covered by a
computerized metal shell.
The operation's
not without risks.
But if it's successful,
you'll be the country's
most unique crime fighter.
I... I can't give up now.
It, it would be like sending
a signal to the Big Boss,
saying it's okay for
him to commit crimes
and ruin the city
with his evil schemes.
I'm going to need help.
A select group of the best police
officers gathered from around the country.
And together, we will overcome
the threat posed by the Big Boss.
Gentlemen, you have my permission
to begin the cybernetic replacement.
Vess said he wanted the best police
men and women from around the country.
So let's start at the top.
Here's our first recruit.
He's with the Miami P.D.
His name is Hugh S. Forward.
He's the best copter
pilot on the force.
Chasing down smugglers
earned him the codename: Bullseye.
(Screaming)
All right, beach bums.
(Grunts)
You have a right
to remain silent.
Bullseye Forward, you're
needed in Empire City.
The computer's just located
another possible recruit.
By the look of
his service record,
Colt Howard's is just the kind
of police officer we're looking for.
Come on, kid. Let's go get him.
Colt Howard's exploits in and around
Philadelphia have become legendary.
His fellow officers have
given him the codename: Mace.
His methods are sometimes out
of the ordinary, but always effective.
(Screaming)
Hey!
Officer Mace Howard,
you're needed in Empire City.
A special police task
force is being formed
to fight the country's
most notorious criminal.
Welcome aboard.
(Laughs)
Oh, come on. Lighten up.
You nailed this notorious
criminal of yours.
Well, thanks for the
information, Raoul.
Berserko!
What do you want, hunk?
Can't you see I'm eating?
Well, I just got a call from a stuie
at Empire City Memorial Hospital.
So?
Well, remember that nosy federal
agent you supposedly got rid of?
It was nothing.
You don't have
to thank me again.
Apparently, you botched the job!
Now get over to that hospital
and find out what's going on.
The way things are going,
Agent Vest's task force
will be assembled in no time.
Yeah, I can't wait to
see his face when we...
I'm sorry, men,
but Agent Vest must not
be disturbed at this time.
We thought we could cheer
him up with some good news.
The doctors say his condition
is touch and go right now.
No visitors allowed.
We understand.
Let's go.
Out of the way!
Can't you see we got
a big customer here?
(elevator beeps)
Hey! The door's
locked to Vest's room!
Good thing I brought
my jackhammer.
Thanks for the flowers, boys.
But I won't be needing them.
Don't bet on it, Vest!
As you can see,
bullets can't harm me.
Give me your gun.
- You want my gun?
Come and get it!
Okay, if that's the way
you want to play it...
It's crime-fighting time!
You're under arrest.
Wait until my,
Uncle hears about it!
And as for you...
No!
Christ!
Ever consider
using the door, jerk?
That Fat Nap Berserko!
Let's get out of here!
Berserko got what?
Busted by a cop with
a bulletproof body!
My cheddar-brain nephew
might be a nincompoop...
But it makes me look bad when
one of my crooks gets caught.
I think I might have something
that will get Berserko back...
And put an end to that
pesky B.P Vest once and for all!
Hey, thanks...
I call it my ultimate
crime machine!
(Dr Bad Vibes laughs)
That's enough, Dr. Bad Vibes!
With this new crime machine,
I'll be able to rule Empire City
no matter what I get best to do!
Empire City was in
the greatest danger.
Would the Cops Special
Unit be ready in time?
The case of C.O.P.S
File #1, case continued.
Central Organization of Police Specialists
Fighting crime in a future time.
Protecting Empire City from
Big Boss and his gang of crooks.
It's crime fighting time.
The case of C.O.P.S File 1.
Part 1
The facts have been
kept secret until now.
You are about to
witness the dramatic origin
of the world's greatest
crime fighting team.
It all began when the notorious
underworld kingpin known as the Big Boss
set his henchmen on a
spree of high tech robberies.
Here's how the caper came down.
I got the combination to open
every bank vault in Empire City.
Me and my jackhammer.
Eeny, meeny, miny, crook.
Stealing the cinch
with this new hook.
Yee-haw!
Let's do it, Buzz-Bomb.
Crimes are wasted.
(Buzz-Bomb laughs)
Right, Buzz-Bomb.
The tires are next.
If doing crime is
going to be this easy,
it'll take all the fun
out of being a crook.
(Laughs)
I'm glad I recruited
you, Dr. Bad Vibes.
Your inventions worked
even better than I expected.
Even Berserko, my numbskull
nephew, managed to grab some loot
without getting caught.
We sure made
monkeys out of the police.
Well, next time Berserko,
steal money, not bananas, eh?
Well, I'll let it
pass this time,
seeing that it was all just
a test of your evil talents.
A test?
Yeah. Dr. Bad Vibes,
I want you to invent
the most powerful crime
machine the world has ever seen.
By next week.
Something that big
will take at least a year.
Did I hear someone
refuse an order? My order?
I'll get right on it, Big Boss.
Well, excellent.
I've set up a new lab for
you in a secluded part of town.
The Big Boss's crooks
are having a field day, and
our local police can't seem
to get a handle on them.
Now, just a minute, Mayor Davis.
You can't blame the
Empire City Police.
The Big Boss has recruited
some new criminal genius.
That's why I've requested
federal assistance.
Federal assistance?
Federal agent B.P. Vess should be
arriving from Washington at any moment.
He's the best
criminologist in the country.
Thank you.
Ah, Agent Vess. So good
of you to come so quickly.
We've arranged a
reception party at City Hall.
If you don't mind, Mayor Davis,
I'd like to go right to
the scenes of the crimes.
I think we might have
our first solid lead.
Mayor Davis, I'll need a
police computer specialist.
Come in.
I'm Officer Tina Cassidy
from the Computer Division.
Here's the information
you requested, Mr. Vess.
Just give me a quick rundown.
Preliminary computer
scan indicates the flying drill
was manufactured at Contrex
Technologies, Incorporated.
I wonder how it fell
into criminal hands.
Here's a possibility.
Contrex just fired a brilliant scientist
for stealing top secret electronics.
He's known as Dr. Bad Vibes.
He could be the big
boss's new criminal genius.
Got an address on
this Dr. Bad Vibes?
819 Peripheral Plaza.
I like the way you
work, Officer Cassidy.
Same here, Agent Vess.
Why do we always get
stuck with the grunt work?
Hey, what's that
flatfoot doing here?
It's me.
This is the first honest
job we've had all year.
819 Peripheral Plaza.
We better phone the big boss.
This must be
Dr. Bad Vibes' place.
You got any change?
Yeah, plenty.
I just held up a gun machine.
Federal Agent Vess,
anybody home?
Hmm, the same flying
drills used in the robbery.
I'd say this Dr. Bad
Vibes is our man.
Laughing fish moving in storage.
All these boxes came
from the same place.
It's not much, but it's
worth investigating.
What do you mean the
police are wise to my plans?
Like I said, we was just
minding our business,
moving Dr. Bad Vibes' furniture.
But some fuzz in a
black and white shows up.
Well, forget about
that flatfoot for now.
Let's get to the lab and make
sure Dr. Bad Vibes is safe.
(Grunting)
"Laughing fish, moving in storage."
Hmm...
Good, the squad
car is still here.
Let's split before the
officer comes back.
Hail robber, yee-haw!
Heeelp, turbo! We're surrounded!
Hey look, those guys
have got to be nuts.
We better stop them
before they hurt somebody.
Let's do it.
10-40, officers in pursuit.
Repeat, 10-40.
Whoa!
Ouch!
Ah!
Ah!
Ha ha ha!
Whoa!
(Shouting)
Call for an ambulance.
10-18, request ambulance.
Repeat, 10-18.
It's B.P. Vance!
The federal agent brought
in to track down the Big Boss?
Whoa!
It's a miracle he's still alive.
It's a miracle my whole scheme
wasn't botched by your incompetence.
But Uncle Big Boss, we did good.
This snooping federal flatfoot
won't bother you no more.
The police never found out
where Dr. Bad Vibes is holed up
while he invents his
new crime machine.
And when he finishes,
Empire City will
crawl at my feet.
(evil laughter)
Agent Vess.
Your injuries are severe.
These research scientists from the
Overdyne Institute are your only hope.
Your body will heal,
but it'll take years before
you'll even be able to walk.
Unless...
- Get to the point, Mayor Davis.
Unless the doctors give
you a new electronic body,
covered by a
computerized metal shell.
The operation's
not without risks.
But if it's successful,
you'll be the country's
most unique crime fighter.
I... I can't give up now.
It, it would be like sending
a signal to the Big Boss,
saying it's okay for
him to commit crimes
and ruin the city
with his evil schemes.
I'm going to need help.
A select group of the best police
officers gathered from around the country.
And together, we will overcome
the threat posed by the Big Boss.
Gentlemen, you have my permission
to begin the cybernetic replacement.
Vess said he wanted the best police
men and women from around the country.
So let's start at the top.
Here's our first recruit.
He's with the Miami P.D.
His name is Hugh S. Forward.
He's the best copter
pilot on the force.
Chasing down smugglers
earned him the codename: Bullseye.
(Screaming)
All right, beach bums.
(Grunts)
You have a right
to remain silent.
Bullseye Forward, you're
needed in Empire City.
The computer's just located
another possible recruit.
By the look of
his service record,
Colt Howard's is just the kind
of police officer we're looking for.
Come on, kid. Let's go get him.
Colt Howard's exploits in and around
Philadelphia have become legendary.
His fellow officers have
given him the codename: Mace.
His methods are sometimes out
of the ordinary, but always effective.
(Screaming)
Hey!
Officer Mace Howard,
you're needed in Empire City.
A special police task
force is being formed
to fight the country's
most notorious criminal.
Welcome aboard.
(Laughs)
Oh, come on. Lighten up.
You nailed this notorious
criminal of yours.
Well, thanks for the
information, Raoul.
Berserko!
What do you want, hunk?
Can't you see I'm eating?
Well, I just got a call from a stuie
at Empire City Memorial Hospital.
So?
Well, remember that nosy federal
agent you supposedly got rid of?
It was nothing.
You don't have
to thank me again.
Apparently, you botched the job!
Now get over to that hospital
and find out what's going on.
The way things are going,
Agent Vest's task force
will be assembled in no time.
Yeah, I can't wait to
see his face when we...
I'm sorry, men,
but Agent Vest must not
be disturbed at this time.
We thought we could cheer
him up with some good news.
The doctors say his condition
is touch and go right now.
No visitors allowed.
We understand.
Let's go.
Out of the way!
Can't you see we got
a big customer here?
(elevator beeps)
Hey! The door's
locked to Vest's room!
Good thing I brought
my jackhammer.
Thanks for the flowers, boys.
But I won't be needing them.
Don't bet on it, Vest!
As you can see,
bullets can't harm me.
Give me your gun.
- You want my gun?
Come and get it!
Okay, if that's the way
you want to play it...
It's crime-fighting time!
You're under arrest.
Wait until my,
Uncle hears about it!
And as for you...
No!
Christ!
Ever consider
using the door, jerk?
That Fat Nap Berserko!
Let's get out of here!
Berserko got what?
Busted by a cop with
a bulletproof body!
My cheddar-brain nephew
might be a nincompoop...
But it makes me look bad when
one of my crooks gets caught.
I think I might have something
that will get Berserko back...
And put an end to that
pesky B.P Vest once and for all!
Hey, thanks...
I call it my ultimate
crime machine!
(Dr Bad Vibes laughs)
That's enough, Dr. Bad Vibes!
With this new crime machine,
I'll be able to rule Empire City
no matter what I get best to do!
Empire City was in
the greatest danger.
Would the Cops Special
Unit be ready in time?
The case of C.O.P.S
File #1, case continued.