Big Time Rush (2009–2013): Season 3, Episode 4 - Big Time Double Date - full transcript
It's date night at the Palm Woods. James helps Carlos on his date with one of the Jennifers, Kendall joins Lucy's dinner with her parents, and Logan takes a blind date out so he can spy on Camille's date with Jett.
- Ah, another perfect day
at the palmwoods.
Except for that.
- Parabolic microphone
now!
What was that?
- Sounded awful.
- It's probably interference.
Just aim.
- Maybe you should date science,
- then!
- Shh.
- All I did was cite recent data
that concluded
- that overexposure with a partner
- or spouse
- Increases the incidents
- of break-ups.
- Mm-hmm.
- Small words.
- Please.
- I told Camille we need to - limit
our dates to two nights a - Week.
- Makes sense.
- Genius.
- Dat-a good.
- I know, right?
She's being dramatic.
- I mean, what is she gonna do,
- date someone else?
Parabolic microphone now!
- So since I hate eating alone
- and you need the exposure,
- How about dinner
- at paparazzi
Tonight at 8:00?
- What?
- It's a date!
- What?
- So I guess she is going
- to date someone else.
- Quit, you.
- Just turn it down.
- Why does it keep doing that?
- ♪ Make it count,
- play it straight ♪
- ♪ don't look back,
- don't hesitate ♪
- ♪ what you want,
- what you feel ♪
- ♪ never quit
- and make it real ♪
♪ If you want it all,
lay it on the line ♪
♪ it's the only life you got
so you got to live it big time ♪
- Dude, Camille just agreed
- to go on a date...
- ah! La-la-la-la-la-la...
- He's taking this well.
- Uh-huh.
- Rehearsal is canceled today.
- How come?
- Because Gustavo's doctor
- ordered him
- To take a 24-hour break
- from the things
That stress him out the most.
- Oh, Griffin?
Budgets?
Writer's block?
- You, you, him,
and Logan!
- Ah! His watch is gonna blow!
- It's a blood pressure monitor,
- and it goes off
- when he's stressed,
- so...
- Stay away from me
for the next 24 hours!
- No rehearsal?
- That means I'm free
to go out...
With a Jennifer.
Later, boys.
- You know, he might have
- a shot this time.
- Until he burp asks her out
or gives her a gift,
which will be a frog.
- I can't let that happen.
Friendship powers activate!
- Hey.
- Hey.
- Hey?
- Hey!
- Hey!
- Ladies?
- Hey, girls.
You look amazing.
We should all go out
and talk about our top ten hit...
Oh, wait.
I'm busy tonight.
But Carlos is free,
red dress Jennifer.
Um, sure.
- Great. He'll see you
- in the lobby at 6:00.
- Huh?
- Look, I am perfectly capable
of getting a date myself.
- Of course you are.
- I'm just trying to play wing man
- for my best bud.
- Well, thank you, bud,
but I can handle it from here.
- I'll hang onto it.
- Give me my helmet, man.
- Let me have it.
- Give me my helmet!
- Sure.
- Hit me again.
Look, it's just time
to face the facts.
Camille and I are just
too different, okay?
I base decisions off logic,
- and Camille thinks my logic
- is stupid.
- Okay, but you know
- that there's no such thing
As the perfect girlfriend.
- You have to take the good
- with the...
- boo!
- Well, then, Mr. Logic,
- what are you gonna do?
Invent the perfect girlfriend?
- Greetings, Logan,
you are smart and hot
like me.
Let's go on a date.
It worked.
Is it too weird?
- Completely.
- But impressive.
- I know.
Go on sciencematch. Date
- and search
- for the perfect girlfriend.
One that's just like me.
Just not a robot.
- What?
- Nothing.
- Well, I'm gonna go search
- for Lucy
Because she was very rude
to me in the lobby.
- Wait, what about the...
- I will never love again.
Get me chocolate.
- Oh, my god.
- Leave me alone.
- No way.
- If you don't,
- I'm gonna rip out your...
Mom, dad, hi.
- Lucille.
- I missed my girl.
Oh, is this a friend
from the conservatory?
- Yes.
This is Kendall,
who studies classical music,
just like me.
- Yep.
- That's me.
Her conservatory friend.
- Well, then you must give us
- a tour
Of this off-campus residence
that you all live in.
- No.
Mom, Kendall has to study for a
test tomorrow, and...
- would love to give you
a tour.
Let's start in the park.
- P for peachy.
- Hey, somebody's looking sharp.
- Uh-huh. I've got a big date,
so I got to dress big, right?
Yeah, you do.
- Oh.
Ah.
- Oops, sorry.
- James!
- Epic juice box fail.
- Now I have to change.
Hmm?
- What are you up to?
- Oh, just saving Carlos' date
- with red dress Jennifer?
- Impossible.
- She's too classy,
- and he's too Carlos.
- Great.
Now I have to wear
this stupid outfit.
- So, bud, where are you taking
the future Mrs. Garcia?
- Well, in my hands right here
I have directions
and reservations
to the nearest sloppy cheese.
There's pizza, prizes,
and a whole lot of fun.
- Mm-hmm.
- Sweet.
- We've got to change
- those reservations
- And go on the date
- with Carlos.
- Can I bring my new slingshot?
- Sure.
We might need it.
- According to her profile,
she has an IQ of 130,
likes math homework,
crosswords, and toast.
- Great.
Why am I here?
- Because if she's a weirdo,
I need my mom to ground me.
Go, go, go, go, go.
Hi. Are you Lindsay?
- Yeah, hi.
Sorry I'm late.
- While on my bike,
- I met strong easterly headwinds,
Probably due to...
Both: A disturbance
in the lower ionosphere.
- Logan Mitchell,
I am your mother.
You are grounded, mister.
- Okay, um...
Uh, what are you doing?
- Don't you notice anything
weird about her?
Or familiar?
- Um, I think she's cute
- and we have
- an awesome connection.
- Yeah, you have
a big connection.
Good luck on your date.
- Not grounded.
- Um, who is that?
- Ooh, Camille, uh,
I didn't even see you.
This is Lindsay.
We're going on a date tonight.
- So are we.
At chez fance-ay.
It's gonna be a chez partay.
- Oh, well, maybe we
should double date.
- Recent data cites
- that double dating
Eases first date jitters
and fosters social interaction.
- Well, I know
Logan loves data.
- And I know that Camille
- loves dating.
- And I know I love people
- looking at me.
So let's meet here at 6:00?
Both: It's a date!
- It's gonna be great.
- I love double dates.
- And as we conclude our tour,
please help yourself
to some complimentary
palmwoods lemonade.
- How sweet.
- Thank you, Kendall.
- You're very welcome.
- Get some for me.
What do you think you're doing?
- I'm learning a lot more
- about you.
Like, you play a violin
and you own a wig
and you lie to your parents.
- Look.
- My parents
- are classical musicians.
- They think I'm in L.A.
- In a violin scholarship.
- And they would be
- very disappointed
And angry
if they found that I dyed
my hair black and red
- and was trying to be
- a rock guitar goddess.
- Okay, okay.
I get it.
- Is there anything I could do
- to help?
- Yeah.
Beat it.
- 'Cause I can tell they're gonna
- invite you to dinner.
- No one can beat
- my mom's midwestern charm.
- Please.
Midwestern charm is no match
for L.A. cool.
- Oh, it's like we're all going
on a fun double date.
- Well, I don't know about you,
but I hope this place
has crayons.
- So where are we going tonight?
- Well, let's just say
that you
- are gonna have the greatest date
- of your life.
- Friendship powers
activate.
- Isn't this stupid enough?
- Activate.
- Ah, messieurs rocque,
- welcome back.
- Table for one, Jacques,
in the corner,
where no one will bother me.
Uh, right zis way.
- Yes.
- Oh, here we go.
- Okay, we got Carlos here.
- Now how do I get close enough
- to him
To keep him
from ruining his date?
- Easy.
- You rock.
And I roll.
- This place is so nice.
- I could have sworn
- that these directions to...
- welcome to chez France.
I think señor
might enjoy reading
ze special here.
- Uh, okay.
"Why don't you order
for us, Jennifer?
And then let's talk
about your feelings."
Wow.
Guys never want to talk
about my feelings.
- And your two most expensive
- meals, please.
- Waiter, I'd like to order.
- Ah!
- Can I at least
have more rolls?
- Maybe if I ask nicely,
those musicians will let you two
play violin onstage.
Oh.
Actually, uh, I play guitar.
- Yeah, you know, 'cause it spans
- all ranges of music,
From classical to jazz
to rock.
- Ugh.
Rock music?
- Do not get us started
on that three-chord trash.
- I have to go
- to the restroom.
So does Kendall.
- Ow.
What was that for?
I'm trying to help you.
- Why don't you just pull
- my wig off while you're at it?
Do you know what my parents did
- when they found out my brother
- dyed his hair and played drums?
- They...
Accepted his artistic integrity
and hugged him?
Ow.
- They sent him
- to military school.
And the guys are here.
- Just Logan and Carlos.
And James,
the mustachioed waiter.
- Hey, who's the...
- shh.
- Say one word,
and you die.
- Oh, can I get more rolls?
- So does everybody know
- what they're having.
- Well, yeah, Camille,
- you should have
- the arrogant blowhard.
Oh, wait, you already do.
- Ooh, where's
the arrogant blowhard?
I must have the lunch menu.
- Do you know what you want,
- Logan?
- Or do you need more data
- to order?
- Oh, here we go.
- Oh, we're going.
- Where is the
arrogant blowhard?
- Are we still talking
- about food?
All: Yes!
- So that's how I feel.
- Now let's talk
- about your feelings.
- Or I could show you how I pop
my shoulder out of its socket.
Check it out.
I just go like this.
And I just keep...
- a Rose for ze lady,
messieurs.
- You know what?
- I'm not gonna pay $10
- for one Rose.
No, thank you, messieurs.
- Oui, oui,
- yes, you do.
- No, I'm not.
- For ze lady.
- No, thank you.
- Oui, messieurs.
- I don't want it.
- Table three is complaining.
- Buy ze Rose!
- Unbelievable.
- I mean, why would I pay $10
for one Rose?
- Because you bought me
a whole bouquet.
Carlos, this is
the most amazing date.
- Yes, it is.
You're welcome.
- Messieurs, your waiter.
- Finally.
- May I take your order,
- messieurs?
- I would like
the trout almondine
with asparagus.
- Trout almondine,
table 12.
- Oh.
- The service here
is a little slow.
Oh, uh, waiter?
- Oui, oui.
- Uh, so what should we get
for dessert?
- What now?
- Your wig's falling down.
I see streaks.
Fix it.
- Okay, take it...
- Oh, no, you hold...
Shh, shh, shh.
- It all looks so good.
- It's so hard to choose.
- I got it. I got it.
- I got it.
All right, here we go.
Okay, we got it.
- All right, we're good.
Let's just skip dessert
because I am so full.
- We haven't ordered dinner yet.
- Uh, check, please.
- Mmm.
Who else is living dining
with me and eating toast?
- I love toast,
but recent data states
- that you should only eat it
- two days a week.
- What?
- That's ridiculous.
If you like something,
- you should enjoy it
- anytime you want.
- Ha!
- So you're saying
- that recent data is wrong?
- Ooh, what I'm saying is...
You're on a date with him?
- You realize you're dating
- yourself, right?
Both: No, we're not.
Wait.
Oh.
- Hey, so you know
- what's really great
To do on fancy dates?
- What?
- Two spoons.
Oh! Ze souffle.
- Carlos, how did you know
I love souffles?
- Oh.
No ice cream?
- A la mode!
- The things I do
for these idiots.
- Ah!
Splat!
Pfff!
- James?
- Oui.
Hey, guys.
What's going on?
- You know exactly
what's going on.
- I told you that I didn't need
- any help on my date,
And you didn't believe me.
- Arm wrestling?
Seriously, dude?
I should still be playing dumb.
- Oh, come here.
- Oh!
- Who wants dessert?
- Ah!
No, no, no, no!
- I had a great time
on this double date.
- No, no, no!
- Watch out!
- Do recent studies show
- that opposites attract?
- Don't know,
- don't care.
- Are you okay with this?
- Recent data reveals four
out of five first dates end in
failure.
- Oh, no, no, no!
- Whoa! Whoa!
- Watch out!
- That's it!
Worst meal ever!
- Oh, but messieurs,
- you haven't seen
- the dessert cart yet.
Ah, here it comes.
- Oh! Oh!
- Yeah, that's James.
- Oh! Oh! Oh!
Who! Whoa!
- Kendall, you saved my wig.
- Yeah.
- I'm not kissing you.
- I know that.
- Oh.
- Lucille.
- Your hair.
- Uh, Mr.
- And Mrs. Lucy's parents,
It's not what you think.
- I think you don't attend
a conservatory at all.
And neither does he.
- Wow. It's exactly
- what you think.
- Mom, dad...
I'm out here writing songs
and trying to be a rock star.
- Oh, Lucy.
We are so disappointed.
- No, no, no, no.
You should be proud of her.
She is...
An amazing musician.
In fat, um...
We can prove it to you.
Right now.
- We can?
- Yes, as long as I get
something to eat afterwards.
- ♪ I don't know why
you always get so insecure ♪
♪ I wish you could see
what I see ♪
♪ when you're looking
in the mirror ♪
♪ that to me you
get more beautiful ♪
- ♪ when you're looking
at the magazines ♪
And thinking that
you'll never measure up ♪
That it hurts ♪
♪ it's what underneath
the skin ♪
♪ the beauty
that shines within ♪
♪ you're the only one
that rocks my world ♪
- ♪ You've got a heart
of gold ♪
- ♪ wish you would stop
being so hard on yourself ♪
- So I can stay?
- Well, at least
it's a string instrument.
- Now, can you put
the wig back on?
- Please.
- You were the best one
- out there.
And this was the best date ever.
- That's because I got
the best bud ever.
- I know.
- Why do you think
- we break up so much?
- Probably because we
like making up so much.
- Huh.
My blood pressure
is perfectly normal.
Turns out I didn't need
to spend quality time away from
my dogs.
I needed to spend quality time
with my dogs.
- The check, messieurs.
- Ah, thank you, messieurs.
- Oh, no, no, no.
- ♪ Step it up,
- get in gear ♪
- ♪ go for broke,
- make it clear ♪
- ♪ make it work,
- get it right ♪
♪ Go and make your luck
with the life you choose ♪
♪ if you want it all,
lay it on the line ♪
♪ it's the only life you got
so you got to live it big time ♪
at the palmwoods.
Except for that.
- Parabolic microphone
now!
What was that?
- Sounded awful.
- It's probably interference.
Just aim.
- Maybe you should date science,
- then!
- Shh.
- All I did was cite recent data
that concluded
- that overexposure with a partner
- or spouse
- Increases the incidents
- of break-ups.
- Mm-hmm.
- Small words.
- Please.
- I told Camille we need to - limit
our dates to two nights a - Week.
- Makes sense.
- Genius.
- Dat-a good.
- I know, right?
She's being dramatic.
- I mean, what is she gonna do,
- date someone else?
Parabolic microphone now!
- So since I hate eating alone
- and you need the exposure,
- How about dinner
- at paparazzi
Tonight at 8:00?
- What?
- It's a date!
- What?
- So I guess she is going
- to date someone else.
- Quit, you.
- Just turn it down.
- Why does it keep doing that?
- ♪ Make it count,
- play it straight ♪
- ♪ don't look back,
- don't hesitate ♪
- ♪ what you want,
- what you feel ♪
- ♪ never quit
- and make it real ♪
♪ If you want it all,
lay it on the line ♪
♪ it's the only life you got
so you got to live it big time ♪
- Dude, Camille just agreed
- to go on a date...
- ah! La-la-la-la-la-la...
- He's taking this well.
- Uh-huh.
- Rehearsal is canceled today.
- How come?
- Because Gustavo's doctor
- ordered him
- To take a 24-hour break
- from the things
That stress him out the most.
- Oh, Griffin?
Budgets?
Writer's block?
- You, you, him,
and Logan!
- Ah! His watch is gonna blow!
- It's a blood pressure monitor,
- and it goes off
- when he's stressed,
- so...
- Stay away from me
for the next 24 hours!
- No rehearsal?
- That means I'm free
to go out...
With a Jennifer.
Later, boys.
- You know, he might have
- a shot this time.
- Until he burp asks her out
or gives her a gift,
which will be a frog.
- I can't let that happen.
Friendship powers activate!
- Hey.
- Hey.
- Hey?
- Hey!
- Hey!
- Ladies?
- Hey, girls.
You look amazing.
We should all go out
and talk about our top ten hit...
Oh, wait.
I'm busy tonight.
But Carlos is free,
red dress Jennifer.
Um, sure.
- Great. He'll see you
- in the lobby at 6:00.
- Huh?
- Look, I am perfectly capable
of getting a date myself.
- Of course you are.
- I'm just trying to play wing man
- for my best bud.
- Well, thank you, bud,
but I can handle it from here.
- I'll hang onto it.
- Give me my helmet, man.
- Let me have it.
- Give me my helmet!
- Sure.
- Hit me again.
Look, it's just time
to face the facts.
Camille and I are just
too different, okay?
I base decisions off logic,
- and Camille thinks my logic
- is stupid.
- Okay, but you know
- that there's no such thing
As the perfect girlfriend.
- You have to take the good
- with the...
- boo!
- Well, then, Mr. Logic,
- what are you gonna do?
Invent the perfect girlfriend?
- Greetings, Logan,
you are smart and hot
like me.
Let's go on a date.
It worked.
Is it too weird?
- Completely.
- But impressive.
- I know.
Go on sciencematch. Date
- and search
- for the perfect girlfriend.
One that's just like me.
Just not a robot.
- What?
- Nothing.
- Well, I'm gonna go search
- for Lucy
Because she was very rude
to me in the lobby.
- Wait, what about the...
- I will never love again.
Get me chocolate.
- Oh, my god.
- Leave me alone.
- No way.
- If you don't,
- I'm gonna rip out your...
Mom, dad, hi.
- Lucille.
- I missed my girl.
Oh, is this a friend
from the conservatory?
- Yes.
This is Kendall,
who studies classical music,
just like me.
- Yep.
- That's me.
Her conservatory friend.
- Well, then you must give us
- a tour
Of this off-campus residence
that you all live in.
- No.
Mom, Kendall has to study for a
test tomorrow, and...
- would love to give you
a tour.
Let's start in the park.
- P for peachy.
- Hey, somebody's looking sharp.
- Uh-huh. I've got a big date,
so I got to dress big, right?
Yeah, you do.
- Oh.
Ah.
- Oops, sorry.
- James!
- Epic juice box fail.
- Now I have to change.
Hmm?
- What are you up to?
- Oh, just saving Carlos' date
- with red dress Jennifer?
- Impossible.
- She's too classy,
- and he's too Carlos.
- Great.
Now I have to wear
this stupid outfit.
- So, bud, where are you taking
the future Mrs. Garcia?
- Well, in my hands right here
I have directions
and reservations
to the nearest sloppy cheese.
There's pizza, prizes,
and a whole lot of fun.
- Mm-hmm.
- Sweet.
- We've got to change
- those reservations
- And go on the date
- with Carlos.
- Can I bring my new slingshot?
- Sure.
We might need it.
- According to her profile,
she has an IQ of 130,
likes math homework,
crosswords, and toast.
- Great.
Why am I here?
- Because if she's a weirdo,
I need my mom to ground me.
Go, go, go, go, go.
Hi. Are you Lindsay?
- Yeah, hi.
Sorry I'm late.
- While on my bike,
- I met strong easterly headwinds,
Probably due to...
Both: A disturbance
in the lower ionosphere.
- Logan Mitchell,
I am your mother.
You are grounded, mister.
- Okay, um...
Uh, what are you doing?
- Don't you notice anything
weird about her?
Or familiar?
- Um, I think she's cute
- and we have
- an awesome connection.
- Yeah, you have
a big connection.
Good luck on your date.
- Not grounded.
- Um, who is that?
- Ooh, Camille, uh,
I didn't even see you.
This is Lindsay.
We're going on a date tonight.
- So are we.
At chez fance-ay.
It's gonna be a chez partay.
- Oh, well, maybe we
should double date.
- Recent data cites
- that double dating
Eases first date jitters
and fosters social interaction.
- Well, I know
Logan loves data.
- And I know that Camille
- loves dating.
- And I know I love people
- looking at me.
So let's meet here at 6:00?
Both: It's a date!
- It's gonna be great.
- I love double dates.
- And as we conclude our tour,
please help yourself
to some complimentary
palmwoods lemonade.
- How sweet.
- Thank you, Kendall.
- You're very welcome.
- Get some for me.
What do you think you're doing?
- I'm learning a lot more
- about you.
Like, you play a violin
and you own a wig
and you lie to your parents.
- Look.
- My parents
- are classical musicians.
- They think I'm in L.A.
- In a violin scholarship.
- And they would be
- very disappointed
And angry
if they found that I dyed
my hair black and red
- and was trying to be
- a rock guitar goddess.
- Okay, okay.
I get it.
- Is there anything I could do
- to help?
- Yeah.
Beat it.
- 'Cause I can tell they're gonna
- invite you to dinner.
- No one can beat
- my mom's midwestern charm.
- Please.
Midwestern charm is no match
for L.A. cool.
- Oh, it's like we're all going
on a fun double date.
- Well, I don't know about you,
but I hope this place
has crayons.
- So where are we going tonight?
- Well, let's just say
that you
- are gonna have the greatest date
- of your life.
- Friendship powers
activate.
- Isn't this stupid enough?
- Activate.
- Ah, messieurs rocque,
- welcome back.
- Table for one, Jacques,
in the corner,
where no one will bother me.
Uh, right zis way.
- Yes.
- Oh, here we go.
- Okay, we got Carlos here.
- Now how do I get close enough
- to him
To keep him
from ruining his date?
- Easy.
- You rock.
And I roll.
- This place is so nice.
- I could have sworn
- that these directions to...
- welcome to chez France.
I think señor
might enjoy reading
ze special here.
- Uh, okay.
"Why don't you order
for us, Jennifer?
And then let's talk
about your feelings."
Wow.
Guys never want to talk
about my feelings.
- And your two most expensive
- meals, please.
- Waiter, I'd like to order.
- Ah!
- Can I at least
have more rolls?
- Maybe if I ask nicely,
those musicians will let you two
play violin onstage.
Oh.
Actually, uh, I play guitar.
- Yeah, you know, 'cause it spans
- all ranges of music,
From classical to jazz
to rock.
- Ugh.
Rock music?
- Do not get us started
on that three-chord trash.
- I have to go
- to the restroom.
So does Kendall.
- Ow.
What was that for?
I'm trying to help you.
- Why don't you just pull
- my wig off while you're at it?
Do you know what my parents did
- when they found out my brother
- dyed his hair and played drums?
- They...
Accepted his artistic integrity
and hugged him?
Ow.
- They sent him
- to military school.
And the guys are here.
- Just Logan and Carlos.
And James,
the mustachioed waiter.
- Hey, who's the...
- shh.
- Say one word,
and you die.
- Oh, can I get more rolls?
- So does everybody know
- what they're having.
- Well, yeah, Camille,
- you should have
- the arrogant blowhard.
Oh, wait, you already do.
- Ooh, where's
the arrogant blowhard?
I must have the lunch menu.
- Do you know what you want,
- Logan?
- Or do you need more data
- to order?
- Oh, here we go.
- Oh, we're going.
- Where is the
arrogant blowhard?
- Are we still talking
- about food?
All: Yes!
- So that's how I feel.
- Now let's talk
- about your feelings.
- Or I could show you how I pop
my shoulder out of its socket.
Check it out.
I just go like this.
And I just keep...
- a Rose for ze lady,
messieurs.
- You know what?
- I'm not gonna pay $10
- for one Rose.
No, thank you, messieurs.
- Oui, oui,
- yes, you do.
- No, I'm not.
- For ze lady.
- No, thank you.
- Oui, messieurs.
- I don't want it.
- Table three is complaining.
- Buy ze Rose!
- Unbelievable.
- I mean, why would I pay $10
for one Rose?
- Because you bought me
a whole bouquet.
Carlos, this is
the most amazing date.
- Yes, it is.
You're welcome.
- Messieurs, your waiter.
- Finally.
- May I take your order,
- messieurs?
- I would like
the trout almondine
with asparagus.
- Trout almondine,
table 12.
- Oh.
- The service here
is a little slow.
Oh, uh, waiter?
- Oui, oui.
- Uh, so what should we get
for dessert?
- What now?
- Your wig's falling down.
I see streaks.
Fix it.
- Okay, take it...
- Oh, no, you hold...
Shh, shh, shh.
- It all looks so good.
- It's so hard to choose.
- I got it. I got it.
- I got it.
All right, here we go.
Okay, we got it.
- All right, we're good.
Let's just skip dessert
because I am so full.
- We haven't ordered dinner yet.
- Uh, check, please.
- Mmm.
Who else is living dining
with me and eating toast?
- I love toast,
but recent data states
- that you should only eat it
- two days a week.
- What?
- That's ridiculous.
If you like something,
- you should enjoy it
- anytime you want.
- Ha!
- So you're saying
- that recent data is wrong?
- Ooh, what I'm saying is...
You're on a date with him?
- You realize you're dating
- yourself, right?
Both: No, we're not.
Wait.
Oh.
- Hey, so you know
- what's really great
To do on fancy dates?
- What?
- Two spoons.
Oh! Ze souffle.
- Carlos, how did you know
I love souffles?
- Oh.
No ice cream?
- A la mode!
- The things I do
for these idiots.
- Ah!
Splat!
Pfff!
- James?
- Oui.
Hey, guys.
What's going on?
- You know exactly
what's going on.
- I told you that I didn't need
- any help on my date,
And you didn't believe me.
- Arm wrestling?
Seriously, dude?
I should still be playing dumb.
- Oh, come here.
- Oh!
- Who wants dessert?
- Ah!
No, no, no, no!
- I had a great time
on this double date.
- No, no, no!
- Watch out!
- Do recent studies show
- that opposites attract?
- Don't know,
- don't care.
- Are you okay with this?
- Recent data reveals four
out of five first dates end in
failure.
- Oh, no, no, no!
- Whoa! Whoa!
- Watch out!
- That's it!
Worst meal ever!
- Oh, but messieurs,
- you haven't seen
- the dessert cart yet.
Ah, here it comes.
- Oh! Oh!
- Yeah, that's James.
- Oh! Oh! Oh!
Who! Whoa!
- Kendall, you saved my wig.
- Yeah.
- I'm not kissing you.
- I know that.
- Oh.
- Lucille.
- Your hair.
- Uh, Mr.
- And Mrs. Lucy's parents,
It's not what you think.
- I think you don't attend
a conservatory at all.
And neither does he.
- Wow. It's exactly
- what you think.
- Mom, dad...
I'm out here writing songs
and trying to be a rock star.
- Oh, Lucy.
We are so disappointed.
- No, no, no, no.
You should be proud of her.
She is...
An amazing musician.
In fat, um...
We can prove it to you.
Right now.
- We can?
- Yes, as long as I get
something to eat afterwards.
- ♪ I don't know why
you always get so insecure ♪
♪ I wish you could see
what I see ♪
♪ when you're looking
in the mirror ♪
♪ that to me you
get more beautiful ♪
- ♪ when you're looking
at the magazines ♪
And thinking that
you'll never measure up ♪
That it hurts ♪
♪ it's what underneath
the skin ♪
♪ the beauty
that shines within ♪
♪ you're the only one
that rocks my world ♪
- ♪ You've got a heart
of gold ♪
- ♪ wish you would stop
being so hard on yourself ♪
- So I can stay?
- Well, at least
it's a string instrument.
- Now, can you put
the wig back on?
- Please.
- You were the best one
- out there.
And this was the best date ever.
- That's because I got
the best bud ever.
- I know.
- Why do you think
- we break up so much?
- Probably because we
like making up so much.
- Huh.
My blood pressure
is perfectly normal.
Turns out I didn't need
to spend quality time away from
my dogs.
I needed to spend quality time
with my dogs.
- The check, messieurs.
- Ah, thank you, messieurs.
- Oh, no, no, no.
- ♪ Step it up,
- get in gear ♪
- ♪ go for broke,
- make it clear ♪
- ♪ make it work,
- get it right ♪
♪ Go and make your luck
with the life you choose ♪
♪ if you want it all,
lay it on the line ♪
♪ it's the only life you got
so you got to live it big time ♪