Big Time Rush (2009–2013): Season 2, Episode 11 - Big Time Crush - full transcript

***

♪♪
♪

*** lady, ready.

*** ready to go.

Flowers are ***

Copy that.

Operation get Carlos a
girlfriend under way.

- Nervous.
- Look.

Girls love syrup so
punch out the mugger,

give granny her purse back, and ***

and boom instant girlfriend.



Got it.

Good luck, lover boy.

Oh, I'm so *** and look, my
purse it's so full of money.

Give me your purse.

I'll save you.

Thank you...

Yeah. We probably should
have rehearsed more.

- # ah, ah, ah-ah, oh #
- Really.

♪ make it count, play it straight ♪

♪ don't look back, don't hesitate ♪

♪ where you go big time ♪

♪ what you know, what you feel ♪

♪ never quitin', make it real ♪

♪ when you're going big time ♪



♪ hey, hey listen to your heart now ♪

♪ hey, hey don't you feel the rush ♪

- ♪ oh-oh, oh-oh ♪
- ♪ hey, hey ♪

♪ go and shake it up ♪

♪ whatcha gotta lose ♪

♪ go and make your luck ♪

♪ with the life you choose ♪

♪ if you want it all, lay it on the line ♪

♪ it's the only life you got
so you got to live it ♪

♪ big time ♪

I'm never going to get a girlfriend.

And do you have a girlfriend?

No.

Then take her to see the movie
Kiss and Tell which opens tonight.

It's the story of a lawyer
too busy for love,

and a own-and-out chef
with a recipe for romance.

It's a film so romantic

but if you're not smooching
in the aisles you're dead.

- Or alone.
- Oh!

If you're feeling sorry for yourself
you're never going to find a girlfriend.

But I don't know what I'm doing wrong.

I'm lovable.

Which is why you need to keep loving.

A girl is not going to walk
through the door, and say

"hey, let's go on a date tonight".

Hey, let's go on a date tonight.

Okay, bad example.

I printed out two tickets
for Kiss and Tell,

***

then print two more...

Because we are going to a
double date tonight with Carlos.

- I've never double dated before.
- Great, it's a date.

We have to find him one.

Of course we can find Carlos a date.

I'm ready.

Yeah, let's leave the helmet here.

Can't do that.

It's for your own good.

No. Stop it. Stop it.

Well, you even look cute as a Grammy.

Oh, thank you darling.

I'm off to an audition but
what are doing later.

Oh, just... you knock, making a ***

lovely.

Well, maybe we'll meet up.

All right. Maybe.

I am so sorry. I lost my glasses.

Are you okay ma'am?

I'm fine.

What's your name sweetheart?

I'm Peggy. I just moved here yesterday.

Oh, you should meet my grandson Logan.

I can see you two have a lot in common.

He's also smart, charming and handsome.

Well, I'll be *** at Palmwoods
looking for my class,

- you know, if you see him.
- Well I'll let him know.

Why are we hiding?

No reason.

Just seems like a nice
day to wear a tree hat.

Hey. You have a crush on a boy.

I do not.

Who am I kidding?

He's got eyes that could melt snow.

You're not going to meet
him by hiding here.

- So let's go.
- Oh, no. I don't want to.

Come on it's for your own good.

Just talk to him.

I'm shy, okay.

That's so adorable.

Okay. Kiss and Tell starts at 8:00.

Which is one of the fastest way to find
a date to the movies is speeding dating.

Now, you have 30 seconds
to talk to a girl,

and get to know her before
moving on to the next one.

And we have picked up the guys
you will have in competition.

I can totally take this.

Now just go in there and be yourself.

- Got you.
- But not too much of yourself.

- What does that mean?
- You're honest which girls love.

But sometimes you're too honest.

You had onions today, didn't you?***

that's what I'm talking about.

Now, the hardest part of any
date is starting a conversation.

So just go there and tell her
something interesting about yourself.

Go get them.

Here is something interesting
about myself.

No helmet.
He hates helmet.

Then I started taking my rash medicine,
and it got mostly better.

So I've got to get myself a girlfriend.

And here you are.

*** a kiss?

Sweet. Now I can drink more.

Don't move.

So which lucky lady is
going to see Kiss and Tell.

- All of them.
- Just not with you.

Hi.

Are you Peggy?

You must be Logan.

Well you look exactly like
your grandmother.

Oh right! I get that a lot.

Hey, got you some flowers.

Thank you for being
so nice to my grandma.

Wow. She was right about you.

Grandma...

Now I can see again I have
a lot of unpacking to do.

But we hang out some time.

Oh, yes, that would be great!

Please, tell me what is going on.

I'm positive it is better
than this book.

I think I have a crush on the new girl.

I know Camille has *** feelings for me,

and she gets be broke up but it
wasn't totally clear, and help.

Well, this one is not going
to be easy honey.

You have to tell Camille you
want to date other people.

What is with you parents and
telling the truth all the time.

Fine, fine, I'll go talk to Camille, okay?

Later.

Katie, when it comes to love
I'm like a doctor... of love.

Now we stroll over there.
I start a conversation,

you jump on in, and before you know it,

he'll have a crush on you.

And you will be there
the entire time so ***

of course. Let's go.

Hey. Cool guy. Can we check them out?

Yeah, sure.

I'm Kyle.

I'm James.

And this is Katie.

And I'm going to Kiss and
Tell with that girl tonight.

Bye.

Would you like a fruit snacker?

Sure.

They're my favorite.

You play catchless snackers?

Yeah.

***

okay. Different approach.

What kind of girl are you looking for?

- Yes.
- He's not picky. That's good.

Okay.

What do you have to offer a girl?

I like origami.

I love to cook, and I respect
women's feelings.

I'm telling you... on paper
he's a total catch.

Hello.

You stay here and get Carlos
for the best double date ever,

and I'm going to find your dream girl.

Oh sweet.

On the next "new town high"...

It's your show.

Rachel gets a shocking secret.

I think *** is in love with me.

You know he has a girlfriend?

- Who's her?
- A ghost.

*** plus she is super cute.

- Tonight at 8.
- Really? You like Megan?

Oh yeah.

Thanks for bailing on me.

Sorry. My bad.

But the good news is Dr. love
got a date to the movie tonight.

Oh, really. Thanks for bailing on me.

*** in fact we're going
to hang out tonight.

Great! Where are you going?
Comic bookstore, ***...

No we're going to see the new movie
everyone is talking about... Kiss and Tell.

Oh sweet. You're going
to see Kiss and Tell.

The hottest make out movie of the year.

What?

Okay. Just got to talk to Camille
about dating a new girl.

Hey Logan. Have you met Peggy?
She's just moved in.

Oh we met. I ran into his grandma.

She had the nicest things
to say about him.

Oh, I bet she did.

She's a great grandma.
I would love to say hi.

She went home to Bulgaria.

That is too bad.

Yeah.

- Okay. I'll catch you guys later.
- See you later.

Hey so everyone is talking
about that Kiss and Tell movie.

Would you want to go tonight?

Yeah, sounds great.

Hey bud.

Hey.

What's the surprise?

I got you a date tonight.

Sweet!

Why aren't you happy?

I wasn't sure you were going
to find a date in time so... I did.

Oh awesome.

I've got two dates now.

That's why they call it a double date.

That's not why.

♪ ah, ah, ah-ah, oh ♪

Candy is great, and
I found her so candy.

Well, I know Megan.

She's doing this as a favor,
and she's great.

Well, Candy is greater.

Really? Because Megan is sweet,
funny and loves videogames.

I do love videogames.

You haven't met Candy yet
who *** and loves shoes.

And she's completely hot.

I think you want Carlos to go out with
Candy because you think she is hot.

I don't want to date with
that girl, I wanna date you.

***

- Megan is.
- Candy is.

- Megan is.
- Candy is.

- Megan is.
- Candy is.

- Megan is.
- Candy is.

- Megan is.
- Candy is.

Guys, guys, guys, guys.

Can I just pick now?

- Megan is.
- Candy is.

- Megan is.
- Candy is.

Grandma.

I thought you went back to Bulgaria.

Oh, well I just came back to see
if you and Logan were doing okay,

and you're still good friends.

- Yes, we're still friends.
- Oh, that's so nice.

Grandma.

Are you sure I shouldn't get
dressed up in the blue outfit

that Logan really likes,
and try to get him back?

Well, he doesn't *** blue outfit.

But, no, no, no, it's
time to be good friends.

Got it.

Then you have a good time
with Peggy at Kiss and Tell.

You must be the coolest
girl in the world.

I know.

Hey. Is Katie here?

Come in my boy.

Come on in.
Have a seat.

- Thanks, James.
- Please. Call me Mr. diamond.

Kyle. Katie is very special.

She's like a sister to me.

So tell me,

what are your intentions?

To take her to a movie.

Not to Kiss and Tell you're not.

Hi, Kyle.

What are you doing?

Just having a little...
Man-to-man with Kyle here.

I like Kyle and you're scaring him.

Katie let me tell you
something about boys.

There are terrible people and I don't
think you should go out with him.

We're going to fun burger,
and then a movie.

It's no big deal.

Kyle, let's go.

- Hey, I printed the tickets.
- Great.

And I made us dinner reservations at ***

that sounds awesome except
we're going to fun burger.

Serves the funnest burgers in town.

Well, as long as I'm alone with you.

Say so long to Kyle and Katie.

You got it.

Okay. So we've decided to let you pick
who you want to take on your date.

Okay.

You're going to hang with
both girls, and then after

getting to know them more...

- You can pick Megan.
- You can pick Candy.

- Megan.
- Candy.

- Megan.
- Candy.

- Megan.
- Candy.

Guys, guys, guys.

- Right.
- Right.

Do you like hockey?

No... I love hockey.

What's your favorite videogame?

Doesn't matter as long as
it's got weapons and violence.

I think that the stupid
stunts are awesome.

I think guys who wear
helmets are awesome.

Corn dogs.

Corn dogs.

Oh, yes.

Sorry but I think Megan is
going to be lonely tonight.

Actually I think Candy will
be the one flying solo.

So I guess I'll meet you
at the movies tonight.

I knew he'd pick Candy.

Okay. So I'll meet you
guys later at the movies.

Bye Carlos.

I couldn't decide.

Are you nuts?

I'm not good at double dating.

I ordered us a mistake shake
with two straws.

Very romantic.

Too romantic.

I forgot one of your mistake shakes.

And here you are.

Enjoy.

He was dropped on his head as a baby.

Don't you think you're being
a little overprotective?

Yeah but the food here is great.

This song is so romantic.

Yeah, right.

Can we turn it off?

There is no...

Oh, that's better.

No. It's not.

Come on Kyle. You can get
a hot dog at the movie.

Great, the food's here.

You know, the food here is terrible.
We can get a hot dog at the movies.

Okay.

Thank you.

Okay.

One small popcorn.

One small soda, and one small licorice.

I'm going to see if I can find
some smaller containers.

Okay.

How is the new girl?

- She's awesome.
- You know Camille is here right?

I think she's trying to win me back.

- Oh, she looks good.
- And she is really cool...

- I don't know, maybe I ***
- Yeah ***

good luck with that.

The movie is starting soon.
It's time to pick a girlfriend.

I know, but they are both so nice.

Carlos you have to pick now.

So pick Megan.

- Candy.
- Megan.

- Megan.
- Candy.

- Megan.
- Candy.

- Megan.
- Candy.

There you are.

The movie is going to be so romantic.

Not as romantic as...
The unicorn princess.

Which I've just got two tickets, too.

Much more appropriate for the kids.

A double date... to the unicorn princess.

In 3d.

Yeah.

This isn't going to work out.

Huh?

Wait. We can still make out.

Hey. We're going to
pass on Kiss and Tell.

Did you know this movie
is for people kissing?

So we're just going to hang out in
the arcade and see you guys later.

Oh thank goodness.

Let's go.

You know you were really annoying
with all of the overprotective stuff?

Yeah, I know.

Thanks.

What?

Listen Peggy, I don't know
how to say this but...

You and Camille went out and ***.

- I'm also my own grandma.
- Yeah, I know that, too.

You're not ready to move on.

That's cool.

Tell me when you are, okay?

You look great tonight.

Thank you.

Look. I may have made a huge mistake.

One small popcorn.

No butter.

Logan this is Steve.
He's my date tonight.

Oh.

That is great.

- Did you want to ask me something?
- No.

I... I just wanna say that I hope
you two have a great time tonight.

Thanks. You, too, mate.

- I'll see you.
- Alright. See you then.

- Megan.
- Candy.

- Megan.
- Candy.

- Megan.
- Candy.

- Megan.
- Candy.

- Megan.
- Candy.

- I pick Candy.
- Oh yes.

He chose my girl... I win.

Hey, I hope we *** feelings, Megan.

This is Candy.

***

I want the other Candy.

No, I mean Megan.

What?

Well, you ***,

because you're both idiots.

That *** possible.

What's going on?

I'll explain everything
and apologize over ***.

- No.
- Candy, would you like to join us?

Sure.

***

*** for Carlos?

*** for Kendall either.

What?

So... do you wanna a kiss, again?

Oh yeah.

*** unicorn princess.

***

Synch by Benfo.