Balls Deep (2016–…): Season 2, Episode 8 - Zen and the Art of Living - full transcript

**

How'd you get started
with Zen in the first place?

My dad's a professor
at UMass Amherst.

And he had us reading
everything when we were kids.

And we read a lot
of Zen scripture.

Now that I'm older,

Zen is the practice
that makes me feel great.

And I still continue
to read all that text.

And I always say
there's 1,000 doors...

- Yeah.
...into the same place.

But Zen is one of those vehicles
to help me get to that place.



So basically what I do
is I start out

by just following my breath.

Um, and they say murky water

only clears when left alone.

So you kinda just watch
your thoughts go by like clouds,

same typical thing
you've heard a million times.

But it's -- it's cliché
because it's true.

You want to straighten
your back up.

Be sovereign in your space.

Sovereign.

And head up high,
but comfortable.

Just feel sovereign,
very confident.

Yeah, just like that.

**



I know
I'm supposed to be focusing

right now, but it's kind of

a strange environment
to be meditating in.

New York City, I mean,
where arts and culture

and kinda high-minded
creative endeavors

fight for space with money

and high finance
and advertising and people

who call themselves creatives,

and then all go out and party
together and get wrecked.

You have branded leisure events
like Ad Week and Fashion Week

and Yoga Week and they're
all the same fucking week.

It's maddening.

Tracey Ryans is a mysterious guy

who navigates this city's
weird nexus of wealth

and creative people
and corporate brands

and the sludgy semi-commercial
collaborative stew

they stir and does
really well with it.

And evidently does so via
his training in Zen Buddhism.

So that's what I'm doing --
or trying to do.

I should probably
get back to focusing.

Did you feel your mind racing,
or did you get relaxed?

My mind wandered a lot.

But, yeah, but that's
kinda the point,

redirecting it back to, uh,
what you're focusing on.

Should we go get a drink?

Yes.

Oh, excuse me.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Gonna have a beautiful day
today, my dear sir.

Are you gonna drink it out
of the bottle, like a rock star?

I'll take your path.
I like it like this.

Rock star, I am not.

Oh, that's tasty.

Let the games begin.
Yeah.

How many companies are you
currently partnered in?

Uh, four restaurants,
two shared workspaces,

drinks company,

a movie theater,
and a hotel upstate.

Eight.

Damn it.

And it all starts here.

But again, like I said,
I can do it all day.

I can do it all day and night
because it's what I do.

You know what I mean?
It's not something

where I'm working at a factory,
punching in every day.

I mean, I told you
I started out working

in the insurance business
as a young person.

That was work. And I did it.
And I loved it. Yeah.

But at the end of the day,
I was exhausted.

But they say, you know,

the age of the athlete is
when you're in your 20s.

And you want to be strong.
You want to look great.

The age of the warrior
is when you're in your 30s

and you want to show
how much money you can make.

And the age of the statesmen
is usually from 40s and 50s,

where you're figuring out
you've done all that,

you've made money.

Like, how are you giving back
to your community?

I think that's a stage
that I'm entering in right now.

I think I skipped
the age of athlete,

went straight to somewhere
between warrior and just,

I guess, probably
still teenager.

If you're not being
true to yourself,

you're not doing
what makes you feel good.

And then you're being
something else.

And then you're
flapping your wings.

You know, and if you're
flapping your wings,

you can do that for a while.
But you're gonna get tired.

You're gonna get exhausted.

But I think when you're
doing what you love

and everything you do
is authentic

and coming from the heart,
then you're soaring.

And once you're soaring,
you can soar all day.

- Hey.
- How'd it go?

How you doing, sir?
Went really, really well.

- Edith Mehiel.
- Thomas.

- Good to meet you, Thomas.
- Good to meet you. Hi.

Should we go to the park?

- Yeah. Let's do it.
- Yeah?

Take a little walk?
Uh, we just had one --

our -- our quarterly meeting

discussing the product
partnerships online,

all that stuff.

When'd you guys
start doing juice?

First of all,
we're calling 'em elixirs.

- Okay. Sorry.
- So they're more like...

It's okay. Basically made
a practice of brewing drinks

every day for six,

eight months and just
getting the recipes down,

getting psyched up about it.

What'd you guys
strategize today?

Online sales,
marketing strategy,

different partnerships,
strategic partnerships

that we'll be working with based

on the companies
that I'm involved with.

Hosting small,
high-impact events

with the right type of people,

more psychographics
and demographics,

documenting that and having
a media partner

that can cascade
that information to the masses.

Hey, when you drink that,
wha-- what do you feel like...

- Uh...
- When you take a sip?

It tastes really good.

I like it.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

What's the rest
of you guys' day like?

I've got a call
with Wieden+Kennedy.

And, uh, then I've got
a board meeting

for The Kitchen later on.

- And then it's Fashion Week.
- Geez.

I always thought of, uh, I --

I certainly always thought
of, like, fashion,

like, the fashion world
and, like, all the --

everything that interconnects
with that and, like,

branding and marketing
is just, like,

one big money circle jerk.

When you look at,
you know, the art world,

the film world,
the fashion world,

it's all part of the ecosystem.
We need each other.

You know, it's, like, people
are already going to see art

- before 6:00...
- Right, yeah.

'Cause everyone's just trying
to get there on time.

Um, so you guys ready to go?

Between 6:00 and 8:00,

you're gonna see that sense
of urgency in everyone...

- Yeah.
- Because everyone's trying

to see as much art
as they can in two hours.

You become a spinning
dervish for two hours.

You don't see the art,
but you see all the people.

- Right, yeah. It's social.
- So -- so it's...

Yeah, it's more
of a social thing.

It's more social than most
people would -- would admit.

But -- 'Cause you don't really
get to see the art.

It's more of a celebration,

celebrating the artists today
for the opening.

- Should we go?
- Yeah.

Keeping track of this
many people

is kinda my personal nightmare.

But I can see how
it's benefited Tracey.

I'd say this is
probably pretty much

how he's made
the living that he has.

Tracey refers to, uh,
Facebook, though,

as his external hard drive.

Says he uses that
to put people together

and keep track of who is who
and who knows who,

so he knows what to talk about
with them, which is smart.

Rashid Johnson.

You're a handsome man,
you know that?

- You're a good-looking kid.
- Yeah.

You're a very good-looking kid.

I haven't seen you...
Because I've been looking at you

on Instagram and Facebook
and social media.

What's your job?

My job?
I have a lot of jobs.

That's the problem.

I've stayed off of Facebook
because I thought

it was lame for a long time.

But I feel like now I'm seeing
how it might have benefited me.

Morning. Um, it's Thomas
from Park Slope.

I'm following Tracey to
the, uh, Shinto Shrine, right?

Shinto Shrine.
At the Brooklyn Botanical...

- Brooklyn Botanical Gardens.
- ...to start our day.

So it's hard to peg
down exactly what,

uh, Tracey does for a living.

He sort of, like,
integrates brands and people.

That sounds odious, but he does
it in kind of a --

in such a manner that it
just feels, like,

less like professional
networking than... shit.

You okay?

No, yeah, it's fine.
The fucking --

the cup holder
just ejected my coffee.

Oh, man.
It's, like, swoop.

**

Anyway, um,
as I was saying, uh, Tracey,

you know, has a number
of, like, jobs, like,

involving kinda art galleries
and businesses,

all the things
he's partnered in.

But I feel like his
real work is actually

kinda, like, floating
between these gigs

and sort of connecting people

from each of his different
worlds with each other,

you know, to benefit
one another.

And then ultimately
that benefits him somehow.

Um, kinda like he's combined
the, uh, sort of ge --

charismatic glad-handing aspect
of his old sales job

with this, you know, kinda
do-what-you-want-all-day

approach to life, which I
associate with socialites.

Um, I mean, for instance,
today, like,

after we hit the park
for our morning Zen,

we're supposed to go
to a yoga class in a graveyard,

and then, um,
take the train upstate

to his rich friend's house
for a dinner party,

which is pretty weekendly
behavior for a Tuesday.

- How Japanese is this?
- I know.

Is it? Is this...

This is nice.

Oh, you see the egret?
You see the egret right there?

Yeah.
Is that real?

Yeah.
Oh, it is.

Yeah.
I thought it was a statue.

And check these out right here.
Look at the koi.

I mean, it can bring you
to tears, it's so beautiful.

I mean, look at that
right there.

That's nice.

How does the world
you consult with,

like, how do they
receive the Zen?

I'd imagine there's a lot
of people kinda

think of it as hokum
or whatever. But...

Well, I still don't
use it directly, but --

unless people bring it up.
My teacher always said,

"Whenever you feel the need
to talk about meditation,

it's time to go meditate."
Okay. Yeah.

Should we walk around
and take a walk?

Sure, yeah.

You normally take calls here?

No, I don't because once you...

This is...
Yeah.

And other people come here

for the same things sometimes.
Yeah.

Around 8:30, someone else may
come and sit there. Right.

But I usually sit here and do,
like, my 40-minute meditation.

I just sit here and be quiet.

And then I'll get up

and then take my calls
once I'm out of here

and walk through the garden.
Right, yeah.

Well, I saw you bow earlier
when we were coming out.

I didn't realize it was
so you didn't hit your head.

So I usually bow
when I go into spaces...

Right.
Just to -- to recognize

I'm going to a different space
and a sacred place

and remind me of how lucky
I am to be here.

Right.

Like, I even have this thing
that my buddy Mark Cooper

and I called Om.
Mm-hmm?

Whenever anything
good happens to us,

we whisper to
ourselves, "Om."

Om.

Just acknowledge that
that's beautiful.

Train comes on time, Om.
Okay.

You know, the --
the clouds clear

and the sun comes out, Om.

Just in your head,
just to remind yourself

how beautiful life is.

Yeah.

It's, like, saying,
like, "Noice,"

but, like,
more Buddhist-y, kinda.

What do you say? Noist?

Like, nice.
You know?

Nice. Nice.
Yeah, exactly. Nice.

- Hi. Thomas.
- Chloe.

- Nice to meet you.
- Chloe. Thomas.

- Anna.
- Anna. Thomas.

- Hi.
- Yoko.

And so most of this crew's
coming upstate with us, too.

Oh, yeah?
Yeah.

Oh, cool. Good posse.

So -- Yeah,
so it's a good group.

So are we going
to your project upstate?

We're not working on my project.

But I own part of a company
with the founder of Etsy.

And it's a sound --
Is he gonna be there?

- Yeah. Rob Kalin.
- Oh, cool.

So we're going to his house.

We'll stay at his place.
Oh, oh, oh.

So welcome, everyone.
Today is one of, uh,

the last classes
that we're doing here.

As we all know,
this is a partnership

between the Brooklyn Greenway
Initiative.

And what we've been doing,
as you know,

is we've been doing qigong,
tai chi, and yoga.

I'll be jumping in every once
in a while and joining you guys.

So please don't giggle
or make fun of me.

I'm not that flexible.

But I will be
with you in spirit.

Inhale.

Exhale.
Dive forward.

Inhale arch.

Exhale.

Exhale.
Come down.

Come back through bent knees.
Child's pose.

Full breath in.

Full breath out.

And back to downward-facing dog.

Left leg to the sky.

Inhale.
Exhale.

Open the hips up.
Inhale.

Left foot forward to the outside
of your left hand.

Fingertips.

Exhale.
Left hand to your hip.

Full breath in.

Exhale. Arm up.

- Again, full breath in.
- Busted.

- Huh?
- I knew you weren't yogaing.

I did it.
I was with you.

I saw...

you saw the glasses come off.

I know it's true.
I should get more guy friends.

I realize that all
my friends are girls.

I mean, I've got
four guy friends.

Exhale. Fold forward.
Bow forward.

So you can just let
your buttocks relax down.

Tracey's morning practices
and general practices

are pleasant, but kind
of extraordinarily mismatched

to this urban environment.

If you can start to absorb
these sounds around you...

Zen, tai chi, qigong, uh, yoga,

all those things I tend to
associate with the West Coast.

Big breath in.

Ahhhhhhhhhh.

And as long
as there's been kinda,

like, a sense
of bicoastal elite,

like, feel like the --

the movement was always Western.

You know, you grow up
in the city,

you get all your shit done,
you party, kill your body.

Then you move out West
and you take on these practices

and, you know,
spend out your senescence.

It's the first time
in my lifetime

that the movement
has really kinda crossed back.

It's odd to see,
uh, things like,

uh, yoga parks being built
at the edge of the BQE.

Just, I don't know, less
meditative spaces in New York.

Also realizing it's
extraordinarily indulgent.

We've been here
about three hours.

Which, like, I don't even think
I have that much free time

in the morning and I basically
don't have a job.

Does make you feel nice, though.

**

So, wait, whose house
are we going to right now?

So, Rob Kalin, founder of Etsy.

Yeah. Found this engineer in
Memphis, Tennessee.

So he's started making
these speakers

the same way they were
making 'em in the '20s.

So Rob came and flew
to Memphis, met the guy,

flew him and his family
back to Catskill

to make the best speakers
that money could buy,

the most beautiful speakers.

So that's what
we're gonna see now.

I own a piece of the company.

I'm helping them take it
to the next level.

Town of Hudson.

Taking a --
taking a car or a bus?

Uh, we've got Rob Kalin
coming to pick us up.

- That's...
- Oh, really? Okay.

- He's coming to get us?
- Yeah.

- He's coming to get us.
- That's sweet.

There he is.

My man.

Hi. How are you?
Good to meet you.

The crew.

Oh.

- Oh, okay. Okay.
- Just bite it.

- Just bite it.
- Wait. Feel it. Feel it.

- Feel it.
- That's hot.

Oh, it's hot out of the oven.

Mmm.

That's great.

- Oh, my God! It's so warm.
- Thank you very much.

So these are from grains
that grow right there,

actually, just south of Hudson.

- A $40 loaf of bread!
- Uh, we're right here.

So it's this building, this
building, and this building.

This is one of the oldest
buildings in Catskill.

It's a house.

It used to be creek-front
property.

And then they built
that building.

Right in front.

I was thinking of cutting
a hole in that building

exactly the shape of this one

and then restoring
a creek-front property.

So we've set up the means
of production to work

with a bunch
of different materials.

And the approach
is pretty simple.

It's use local,
natural materials...

Yeah.

...but use the fanciest robots
we can

and make beautiful
modern objects out of it.

And, like, I haven't seen anyone
else doing those three things.

I've seen people working with...

- One or the other.
- ...local, natural materials.

But they usually
make these very kind of

grandmotherly sweaters,
which I love.

But doesn't quite grab
my imagination.

- Right.
- It's kind of, like,

a craft version of Disney world.

- These are the smalls.
- The small ones.

Oh...

You guys want to
come back this way?

This is our disco.

- Nice!
- Aw, yeah.

- Yeah!
- Morton, let's do this.

Rob's been showing us
around what he calls his,

uh, craft version
of Disney World.

There's a lot of legitimately
cool projects going on.

Like the, uh,
the speaker company

Tracey was talking
about on the train,

which is run out of basically,

like, the most amazing
audio lab/workshop

anyone's had going
since the tube amp days.

Now you're on my floor

where electronics happen,
day in and day out.

And it's all for the guy
who runs it, Jeffrey,

who's, like, a certifiable
genius-level acoustic engineer,

to work his dream projects out.

Rob basically built it for him,

which is, you know,
beneficent as shit.

Treble horn.

This is more of
an upper-mid range.

This is kind of an upper bass.

Slightly different breakpoints
than downstairs.

So the goal is really
to make it simple for people

who just listen to music.

You got it?

- How much of it is, like...
- It's funny, though.

I feel like every time
Tracey introduces me to someone,

I end up either on, like, a tour

or a pitch meeting
for their business.

I didn't realize how
complicated, uh, lanterns were.

Even, like, this dinner
party/dance party

we've been promised
is actually the demo

for super high-end speakers.

But it's also still, like,
a really nice party

of cool people.

This barn is 250 years old.

We spent two years restoring it.

And this is the very first
event that we've had in it

since it's been restored.
So...

- Wow.
- The building is watching us.

This is something very special
for the building.

Dig in.

Tracey oscillates between sales

and social mode so rapidly.

It's, like,
hard to keep straight

where the business
turns to party

and back to business.

Even his speech is this, like,

continuous blend
of business speak,

ad jargon, and then exuberant,

hyped-up flattery,

peppered with little
nuggets of Zen.

I'd really like to thank
all you guys for coming

and, uh, joining us.

As you see, Rob spent
a lot of time,

energy, and, uh...

I'm not done.
I'm not done.

I'm d-- I do this, Rob.
I do this.

There's a narrative.

This is what I do, Rob.
This is what I do.

Uh, Rob has put
a lot of time, energy,

spirit, and love
into this place.

And I'm very grateful for him

to welcome us to this bounty

and inaugurate this place as --

as they're wrapping it up
and finishing it.

But I'd also like to thank,
uh, my friends

and our partners at Wheel Fi.

And I'd like to thank
my fearless,

beautiful, crazy,
insane posse group for --

for, uh, rallying
and practicing meditation,

qigong, tai chi
with us this morning

and actually being able
to soar like eagles,

getting up at 6:30

and diving like whales like
we're gonna do tonight.

**

These are black walnuts.
This is a black walnut tree.

These are all black walnuts.
Smell this.

Is this a apple or pear?

- Black walnut.
- Black walnut.

Smells nice.
That's great.

We had a dinner party
last night at Rob Kalin's house.

He's the -- one of the guys
that founded Etsy.

But his current project,
what he's using his money for,

is a company that's basically --

he found an insanely
brilliant audio engineer

who is into old tube
electronics.

Uh, just keep --
keeping an eye on you.

Rob, how'd you meet Tracey?

Speed dating.

Ah.

What type of speed?

Oof.

There's definitely some frames
missing from last night.

But I feel like I've finally
sussed out Tracey's role

in this whole art, money,
advertising cosmic enchilada.

He's basically
a professional socializer.

Which I mean in an obvious
sense, where he goes out

and socializes
and that profits him.

Um, but also in, like,
a transitive sense,

where he socializes
other people,

from separate groups of people
with each other.

And then that profits them.
So you have, you know, creative,

artistic types
who get to meet people

who can finance
their dream projects.

And you have wealthy
would-be creative

types who get to hang out
with cool, interesting people

and have them to their
dinner parties, patronize.

- This is getting worse.
- Yeah, I -- I don't go to

the city much,
so when I do, I'm, like,

"I want to party.
What's Tracey doing?"

He's like a --
a social concierge.

At a base level, what he really
is is a facilitator of fun,

which is kind of its own
currency in New York,

especially among the class
of people who are already,

you know, have enough
actual currency

for this lifetime
or several others.

Oh.

Oh, sorry.

Kinda thought all the, uh,
Zen stuff was a put-on at first.

But more I think about it, like,

if you ever read
Alan Watts' lectures,

especially, uh, his kinda spiel

about prickles and goo,
really applies to Tracey.

He's the guy who takes people
from the prickle world

and introduces them
to the goo people,

just making ever more gooey
prickles and prickly goo.

Which is --
which is very Zen, indeed.

This is, you know,
almost as Zen as archery,

which is, uh, something
Tracey does as well.

So once you get
the technical side down

of anything, right,
the rest is magic.

Right, right. Okay.
And that's that beauty.

That's the art that's gonna
come to that. Yeah, exactly.

Alan Watts.
It's all music.

You're supposed to be dancing.

- Yeah. Exactly.
- All right.

Oh, Carl Jung, Alan Watts,
Kierkegaard, right?

All these... Thomas Morton.

I look along my, uh, left hand?

Say it again.

Yeah, that looks --
that's -- arm straight.

You want to bend
it up like this.

You want the bow to be
level. Yeah.

And pull it right up into here.

This is the anchor
right around here.

- Right about...
- Right around here.

You want to -- you want to
touch that with your finger,

if you can.
Okay. Touch your ear.

All right.
And then just let it go.

It's your first time.
Into the dirt.

It's really sincerely
not about hitting the target.

Okay. It's like everything
we've talked about all day,

from the art world
to business meetings

to being with your friends,
it's about being sincere.

And this is just a vehicle
to get you to that place...

Got it.

That is love,
which is comfortable,

which is Zen, which is whatever.

So it really doesn't matter
what vehicle you use

- to get there.
- Yeah.

And once you let go and you're
not trying hard...

Yeah. That's when
you get all the bull's-eyes.

Right. Right.
When you're letting go...

Yeah.
You're going like this.

- Okay, I just want to...
- And you go like that.

I just want to keep
the hand there and just...

Keep the hand there
and just let it go like that.

I would t-- take a deep breath.

Relax, and then just let go.

Remember that feeling
on the dance floor last night

when that song played
and just kicked in?

Mm-hmm.
That's what you're looking for,

that feeling more
than anything else.

That nice, comfortable,
happy place.

Looking good, Mr. Morton.

Oh, thank you.