Ballers (2015–…): Season 2, Episode 6 - Saturdaze - full transcript

Welcome back to the single life.

Ah, thank you, my friend,
but I'm not single yet.

Oh, really? You're gonna try to
make it work out long distance?

I mean, assuming that
Tracy gets the job.

Don't let my past cloud your judgment
about me. I'm a different man.

My friend, you haven't had
a monogamous relationship

last longer than six months
in your entire life.

And you're gonna put 1,200 miles
of space between the two of you?

I'm gonna start counting days
before that side piece shows up.

Thanks a lot for the vote of confidence.
Real fucking inspiring.

Well, you're hitting the
Don Julio a little hard.



You know, I'm assuming that
you're still self-medicating.

When'd you become my
guru all of a sudden?

Huh, Swami Antolotti?

You know, we're not talking about me.

Think about that for a second.
When was the last time

you were locked down with a woman
for more than a couple of months?

- Don't start.
- Huh? You know why?

Because you have intimacy issues.

Yeah, right.

I have intimacy issues.

You should look deeper into
that psychological shit

and you should give your
fucking shrink a raise.

Okay. Shit.

Oh, shit. Excuse me, can you
turn the TV up, please?



Oh, this can't be good.

Listen, I'm
not a big fan of the combine.

It's really not a test of
your football ability,

but more of your athleticism.

But after his no-show at the combine,

who knows if Travis Mack can even run?

Right now I've got him going
second round on my big board.

Given his inability to prove
that he's not a total head case,

he could fall even further.

Only begs the question, who the hell
is representing this train wreck?

Now let's take a look at my sure thing.

Excuse me, Don, could I
have one more, please?

Hang on, he's a major pain in the ass,

but second round? Second round?

- No.
- That's a fucking travesty.

I'll call Schlereth tomorrow.

Can I have some, too? Oh, you know Mark?

Yeah, we burned some time
trolling for marlin.

Is that code for something?

No, he's just straight
up my fishing buddy.

I'm gonna go see if I can
take care of this shit.

Morning, Mr. Siefert.

Charles, have a seat. Hungry?

I can always eat.

Must be nice not having to
worry about staying in shape.

Eh, I got a newborn to chase around.

It's not like I can
exactly let myself go.

24/7, Charles. 365 days a year.

Yes, sir. Being a parent is a
very serious responsibility.

I'm talking about our job.

That's what goes into 16 games a year.

I'm ready.

When I commit, I'm committed.

Good.

We're letting Kovac go.

We're getting rid of Kovac?

We're not here to make friends.

Yeah, but you cut me to keep him.

You said go smaller.

We signed a nice athletic
Pro Bowl tackle from KC.

Kovac got to go.

I want you to tell him.

- What?
- That gonna be a problem?

Going from the Black Swan to
the vulture circling his prey?

Uh, no, sir.

I can handle it.

Good. Drop a dime and drop the bomb.

You know, I should
probably do it in person.

It's just more respectful.

I don't care if you do it from
a hot-air balloon, Charles.

Just get it done.

Yes, sir.

Wow, Bob Izumi over here.

I'm the king of the ocean.
Let's do this.

Where's our boy Mack Attack?

- Good question.
- Okay.

Ah.

Ah.

Ah, yeah.

Well, let's go hook us
some dolphins, fellas.

Yeah, now Greenpeace is gonna hate
him just as much as everybody else.

- Nice shirt.
- Nice haircut. Let's do this.

All right, Spence, I'm confused, man.

Is this for business or pleasure?

- A little bit of both.
- It's covert business.

It's the art of doing business
without doing any business at all.

All right, well, who are we
not doing business with?

Mark Schlereth.

Fuck no. That dude's trying
to destroy my life, man.

Hey, what we're hoping for today,
and obviously it's a big-ass hope,

is that he gets a little face time
with you and he changes his opinion.

We're gonna need that.
It'll raise your stock.

I belong in the top five, Spence.
You and you told me that.

And we're gonna get you in the top five.
Right now, we win Mark over,

things will move along a lot quicker,
all right? So we got a job to do.

Your part is you're just gonna be cool.

No bullshit today. Just cool Travis.

Top five better be worth it, baby.

I'll just be myself.

Good. No, don't be yourself.
Be a better you.

Mark Schlereth.

Handsome son of a bitch, get out here.

- Hey.
- Buddy.

Here's the man who's killed
more tuna than StarKist.

How are you, Spence? Let me get that.

Good. I'm good. It's good to see you.

- You remember Jason Antolotti.
- Of course.

- Jay.
- Mark. Hair's on fleek as always.

I appreciate that. You know,
late night last night,

but luckily she never tells the tale.

Amen. This
here's Travis Mack.

Travis, it's a pleasure to meet you.

- Heard a lot about you.
- Anything good?

Yeah, Spence has said a few nice things.

Has he? Then why are you
shitting all over me, man?

Travis.

No, seriously, I read all
the articles and stuff.

And do you really think
I have small hands?

I mean, look. Do those
hands look small to you?

- Take a look at that one.
- Spence.

Maybe this isn't such a good idea.

You know what? This is a great idea.
Knock it the fuck off.

You got to forgive my client.
He's an acquired taste.

Yeah, kind of like motor oil.

We're gonna hit reset right now

and just get to know each other.
You're both players.

No, he's a has-been. Let's
just get that right.

Has-been. Listen, kid,

you ain't dropped a squirt
of piss in a bucket yet.

We'll be right up.

- What are you doing?
- What are you doing?

You gonna sabotage this whole
thing before we even push off?

That man has played 12
years in the league.

He's won three Super Bowls.

Get yourself together and
show some goddamn respect

for a guy who has paved the way.

You don't know
dick about no lifestyle.

I know Ricky gonna like New Orleans

way more than he gonna like Buffalo.

Everybody knows that.
Even Bella said that.

What the fuck he
care what that girl said?

You know he care what Bella said.

Y'all still sitting in the same spot

talking the same shit, huh?

It's about the dollars there, Ricky.

I mean, that's what they're
offering you in Buffalo.

I mean, you can't be wearing that

Liberace-ass robe up
there in no family town.

I'm telling you, man, you
gonna need some terry cloth.

The old man right about the robe,

but he been hating on New
Orleans all morning.

- Hey.
- Hating-ass nigga.

Tyrod Taylor is ripping
it the fuck up in the NFL

and TTD talking about he don't
like no black quarterback.

A brother hating on a brother
for being a brother.

No, I said I don't like no
quarterback wearing no elbow pads.

I don't give a fuck if
you're red, green or brown.

That motherfucker afraid of getting hurt.
That's all I'm saying.

Both y'all need to mind your business.

Hey, man, the clock is ticking.

I'm gonna take as long as I
need to to make a decision.

Hell, I might not want to leave at all.

Are you fucking crazy?

Miami squatted and took
a shit on your face

when they offered that
contract to Alonzo.

Come on, man. Look, Rick,

you need to shut out
all this noise, okay?

Clear out the Funhouse for you.

You go over there and think peacefully.

- No distractions.
- Genius.

- Yeah.
- Appreciate that.

You know what I mean? That's
what I'm here for, baby.

Fuck Miami, fuck New Orleans,

and get it out your skull!

You hear me, Ricky?

- Joseph.
- Yes.

So glad you could make it.

Anna, you have not changed a
bit since I last saw you.

So you're saying I'm still
shit-faced and slurring my words?

No, no, that's
not what I'm saying at all.

Two shots of 1942 chilled

for me and this very handsome man.

- You got it.
- Thank you.

So whose house is this anyway?

An old business associate of mine.

Well, he's killing it.

You know him. Andre Alan.

What?

You're not fucking joking. Shit.

Oh, man, you know what? You know what?

Maybe it's not such a
good idea that I'm here.

Don't be silly.

Andre's the one who
asked me to invite you.

I am right here for you.

You can do this.

Fuck. I hate this shit.

Fucking little brats.

Who are you?

I'm Charles Greane. Is your daddy home?

Dad, the Black Swan is here.

Sorry for dropping by unannounced.

You know, looks like I could've
caught you at a bad time.

Don't be silly. I always got
time for the Black Swan.

Huh, wow. This is a great cave, Nick.

Yeah? Every dad needs one.

Keeps you sane.

How's your little girl doing?

Kiki? Oh, she's great.

Great, yeah. Growing and growing.

It goes fast.
Lydia turns six today.

I saw. Big old birthday party out there.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. You want
something to drink?

No, no. No, I am okay.

Man, I still can't even believe it.

My little girl looks up at
me with those eyes, bro,

- my heart just melts,
you know what I mean?

- She has your eyes.

I mean, luckily she got released
from the hospital today

or we had to cancel this birthday party.

- The hospital?
- Asthma, man.

Bad asthma.

But the pediatrician says we
got it under control for now.

Well, that's a relief.

I thank God every day for that wonderful
doctor here in Miami, Charles.

I don't know what I
would do without her.

Well, at least you got that one handled.

For the time being.

But you never know with asthma.

What you want to talk
to me about again, man?

Ahoo!

Whoo!

Nobody's ever happy unless I
got them going number one.

No, I know, I get it. Okay, but
Khalil Mack, Luke Kuechly,

he should be picked accordingly.

Then why didn't he go to the combine?
They did?

Jeez, the combine, the combine.

That's all you guys ever talk about.

Hey, have a pacifier.

Dude, listen, he was
double and triple-teamed,

okay, all season long,
he still wreaked havoc.

He's a football player, okay?
He's not a workout warrior.

All right? Not like you, like
a big workout warrior, man.

Come on, his strength is functional.

Functional? That's where
we're going, functional.

You and I both know that's an
excuse for guys who can't lift.

Hey, the underwear Olympics just
wasn't the right play for him.

Thank you, Jason. Okay.

So take Vontaze Burfict, Terrell Suggs,

yours truly, we all
had horrible combines

and went on to have a
pretty good career, right?

By the way, you weren't even
invited to the combine.

He overcame that for three Super Bowls.

You know you cannot measure a
professional football player that way.

I get it, man. Nobody
gets it better than I do.

But I make my picks based
on the information I have.

Give me more information, maybe
you'll get a different result.

Now, you want to fish or
you want to fuck around?

All right, fair enough. Let's fish.

Come on.

All right, this is gonna be a long day.

I think we need to up the drinks.

This isn't water, buddy.

So, how'd he take it?

Uh, o-okay, I guess.

I'm sure he preferred hearing
it from you, not from Siefert.

Baby, nobody want to hear that news.

Not one player. It's all so sad.

Did you know little
Lydia has got asthma?

- She does?
- Yes, and they love their doctor.

Hard to find.

Whole thing just makes me want to cry.

You didn't tell him, did you?

I couldn't.

I couldn't. I couldn't do it.

Charles, this is not your decision.

Just like it wasn't your decision
when they decided to cut your ass.

If you don't tell him, Siefert will.

Turn the car around.

Good to see you.

Reed will listen to
anything you say to him.

- Joseph Krutel.
- Andre.

Good to see you without your bodyguard.

Well, I wish I could
say the same for you.

Oh, Martin. He came with the house.

Ah, well, what a great house it is.

A little small for my tastes, you know?

No place to land my jet.

Why don't we have a drink in private?

There's a couple things I
want to talk to you about.

Yeah, sure. Why not? Ahem.

If something happens to me, tell
Spencer it wasn't an accident.

- Okay?
- Okay.

Hello. My name is Ricky.

You have a beautiful country.

Sh-- great Negro Jesus!

Hi.

I didn't know anybody was here.

We just arrived. I'm Natalie.

I'm Jenna.

- I'm Ricky.
- We know who you are.

So what are you doing, Ricky?

Learning Hebrew.

Planning on making a
pilgrimage to Jerusalem.

Get my pray on. Where
y'all ladies from anyway?

- New Orleans.
- Oh.

TTD put you up to this.

Yeah, well, he figured we could
help you make a decision.

New Orleans has some of the best
Baptist services in the South.

Perfect for a man of faith.

And I have some great
real estate contacts.

I can get you a sick place to live.

Huh.

So you ladies are like the
board of tourism in bikinis.

Something like that.

Let's talk real estate. Come on up.

Watch yourself.

Oh, there he is.

The big one.

Atta boy.

Come on, Mark.

Kicking your ass, Travis.

Pay attention, ladies. You
might just learn something.

I told you I'd bag one first, Travis.

Ah, now I know where Ricky
gets his big mouth from.

- You owe me a hundred.
- They just pulled his offer.

You fucking serious?

When it's over, it's over, pal.

It ain't yours unless
you get it in the boat.

- Where the hell's he going?
- Travis.

- I'm going to get the fish.
- Don't get the fish.

The fish is fine. Get back in the boat.

Hey, the world doesn't care if
you can manhandle a sailfish.

They want to know how fast he can run.

Khalil ran a 4.65. Luke a 4.58.

What you got under the hood, Travis?

Hey, he can run a 4.6 anywhere, anytime.

How about right now?

I'll bet you 1,000 bucks
he can do it right now.

After a six-pack of beer? You're on.

Uh-- uh, I thought today
was like leisure day.

Captain Dave. Just need
40 yards of dry land.

Thank you, buddy. Put the knife away.

Stretch. You're gonna run.

What I really want is a place
with that Southern Goth style.

Don't give me no haunted house.

You know New Orleans got
a lot of ghosts, right?

We can manage that.

And all your church work will
ward off any evil spirits.

Hallelujah.

Oh, man.

I can't get no peace around here.

Excuse me.

Shalom, Jason.

I got some not such good
news for you, Ricky.

- The Saints pulled their offer.
- What the fuck for?

- Well, it's your old man.
- What's Dennis got to do with this?

Why don't you go check his Twitter feed?

Hold on.

That overbearing motherfucker!

I'll call you back, Jason. What the--?

You're doing a great job at ASM.

I wish I could take all the
credit, but it's a team effort.

Not from where I'm sitting.

You are the only commodity
that they have.

Spencer, you know,

he's masquerading as a finance manager.

Why don't you come join my team?

Is that why you had Anna invite me?

Ah, wait, you didn't have the
nerve to do it yourself?

Or maybe you thought I'd turn you down.

That never happens.

I'm offering you a way out.
$500,000 a year.

You're making 350 as a
base salary at ASM.

How the fuck do you know what I make?

I've built an empire on information.

Well, kudos for doing your homework.

Spencer is just a pretty facade.

You are the mechanism
that moves that machine.

Come work for me.

Don't let him keep you down.

I'll think about it.

Enjoy the party. Take your time.

Mull it over.

Mi casa, su casa.

Come on, honey. Let's go. Let's go.

It's okay, baby.

God damn it!

- Fuck! I'm sick of this shit.
- Daddy's going crazy.

I bought this
fucking stupid-ass pool.

Stupid-ass house. Fuck!

Charles, thank God you're here.
You have to talk to him.

- Oh, shit.
- What the fuck is going on?

God damn it! Fucking
lying-ass motherfucker.

Lying-ass motherfucker!
Lie to me like this!

What's up, Charles?

I didn't expect to see you
back so fucking fast.

Hey, Nick. Everything okay?

Do I look fucking okay, Charles? Huh?

I just finished
reconstruction on this shit.

They're supposed to fill it next week.

I guess that's just not gonna
fucking happen, right?

- Huh?
- How'd you find out?

You was acting so fucked up, I just
went ahead and called fucking Siefert.

And he broke the news down for me
the only way that he knows how.

- Like an asshole?
- Exactly.

I'd have preferred to hear
it from you, big man.

I'm sorry I hadn't had the guts
to tell you earlier, all right?

But your sting will pass.

You're young and you're gonna land
somewhere that really needs you

and you're gonna play in this
league for a long-ass time.

You got to trust me. I've been
around long enough to know.

But you got to believe it.

In your heart.

I'm trying, man.

For my family.

Well, then you got to
be strong for them.

Right?

Man, you're Nick Kovac.

They can't tell you shit.

Right? Fuck Siefert.

Thanks, man.

How you know I needed that?

I didn't.

Shit, that was for me.

He gonna run today or what?

You got this?

Yeah, I got it.

What the fuck?

It calms my nerves, man.

Listen to me. You got this.

You really think so?

Yes, I do.

Dennis! This fucking-- Dennis!

Dennis! Where the fuck you at?

What make it so difficult
for you to call me Dad?

Have you lost your simple-ass mind?

'Cause of you, New Orleans
pulled their offer.

New Orleans? Fuck New Orleans, man.

Hey, look, Buffalo is
where the money is.

Oh, what, Buffalo got
you on payroll now?

Oh, come on, Ricky. It's only your
interests that I got at heart.

Oh, now you want to be a
hands-on parent, right?

It's better late than never, man.
Come on.

I'm 30 years old. School is out.
You missed it.

Maybe I missed it, but maybe it's
that little piece of ass Bella

that makes you not want to leave.

Disrespect her, motherfucker--

Get your hands off me.

Fuck that!

You little mother--
God damn it.

Time you pay your daddy
some motherfucking respect.

Is this for real or are
you niggas play-fighting?

Fuck you!

Nothing. Boring.

Shit.

Yeah.

Fuck, Andre. Hey.

- I was looking for the bathroom.
- Mmm.

That's not it.

I hope you didn't soil my rug.

No, no.

I'm totally housebroken.

But you probably knew that, right?

- Well, I wasn't sure.
- Well, I am.

So case closed.

Hey, um, while you're here,

I've been thinking about your offer

and I'm gonna have to
respectfully decline.

It's very generous and thank you.

It really is, but...

sadly, I'm more loyal
than I am ambitious.

Well, I am sorry to hear you say that.

Well, there's a first time
for everything, right?

- Mm-hmm.
- Well, but great party.

The food, Anna, drinks,
really, really fun day.

Thank you.

Uh, there's something
I forgot to mention.

Your partner lost quite a
bit of money a while back.

The kind of money that would raise
even the wealthiest of eyebrows,

not to mention clients.

Yeah, I don't know anything about it.

I know you don't, but the NFLPA does.

Which makes me wonder, if Spencer
doesn't trust you enough

to tell you the truth about his past,

how could you possibly trust
him with your future?

- Boy, something to think about, huh?
- Mm-hmm.

- For the drive home.
- Yeah.

Great. Thank you. Got to go.

Don't forget to use the bathroom first.

I'll hold it.

Holy shit. 4.58.

- Wow!
- Are you kidding me?

- Are you kidding me?
- I guess I owe you some money.

No, keep it. That'll make this business.

- Whoo! Holy shit.
- Whoo!

Hey, the kid may have small
hands and short arms,

but one thing we now know he
can do is the boy can run.

He's even quicker chasing the ball.
Believe me.

Listen, when I'm wrong, I own it.

- My apologies.
- Come on.

Whoo-hoo-hoo!