Alone (2015–…): Season 2, Episode 13 - The End Game - full transcript
In the final days of the competition, the remaining participants battle for supremacy. After pushing their minds and bodies to the breaking point, one claims the $500,000 prize.
[dramatic music]
*
- Yes!
The biggest rock bass
I have ever caught!
Physically, I can hold my own
for a long time doing this.
But emotionally, this is
getting more difficult.
The isolation
is getting to me.
- This is all I can handle!
I'm starving.
It's getting worse
day, by day, by day.
Please, God, help me.
I can either lose this,
or I can gut it out and win it.
I want to win this bad.
- Oh, boy.
My whole gill net is out.
I'm gonna try
to set it up from the kayak.
*
[yelps]
[screams]
*
- Who are you when everything's
been stripped away?
[bleep].
- It's basically fighting
an inner battle all day long.
- It's scary out here
in these woods.
- I have not had
a serious meal in a week.
- If I can't get a fire,
then I can't stay here.
- It's always in the back
of your mind,
"Well, I could tap out."
- Putting up
with this filming bull[bleep]?
- Running into a predator,
it's not an if.
It's a when.
Get the hell out of here.
I see you.
Get out of here!
- I'm leaving this place.
- [moans]
- That prize money
would be huge.
Yes!
[growls]
- Believe me,
I'll keep fighting.
Every step of the way,
I'll keep fighting.
Whoo!
- $500,000 can make things
better for us.
*
- How long is long enough?
*
*
- Ah!
Oh.
I am drenched
in freezing cold water.
*
About 85%
of my clothing is wet.
*
Once they're wet,
they're very difficult to dry
in this environment.
*
*
Right now,
I feel pretty weak.
I'm like an old, old man.
*
[boat engine rumbling]
*
Oh, I'm sorry, Shauna.
I'm sorry.
I tried.
The water is freezing.
*
Sorry to to my love, Shauna.
To my family, my son.
My friends,
everybody I let down.
I was pretty sure
I was gonna be here
for a number of more days,
but all my wool clothing
is on me.
My thermal clothing is on me.
*
And most important,
the only pair of boots
that are dry are wet inside.
Tonight, I wouldn't...
I wouldn't make it.
*
[groans]
It's devastating
when you tried so hard.
You lost so much weight,
as I have lost.
So much strength.
Like, really ruining my body
just to push it
one more day
and another more day.
For love.
*
I would do anything
for my family.
And I did.
*
I didn't quit because
I ran out of love, did I?
I ran out of body heat.
*
I mean, like I said,
it's the bush.
Things just happen.
You plan and plan and plan
and then the bush finds a way
to surprise you, anyway.
*
Some things work out,
and some things don't.
*
In the end,
nature rules.
We're just part of it.
*
*
- You got that $500,000
reward over here.
"Hey, look at me."
*
"You want to tap?
"You could have
100, 200, 300, 400,
$500,000, boy."
*
"$500,000.
"If you want to
sell your house...
you could with me."
*
[grunts]
Going nuts out here, man.
Frickin' nuts.
*
But I owe it to myself
to give it, you know,
110% out here.
So that's why I'm not
gonna tap today.
What I think
I'm gonna do today is,
I think I'm gonna make
at least one hand line.
What I'm gonna do
is tie a rock to the bottom
of the fishing line,
tie probably four hooks up,
tie that piece of styrofoam up
at the top to be a float,
and then I'll just tie
that line off to a rock
or something over there.
You never know.
I mean, it could be--
I could get a fish out of it.
I'm pretty hungry,
I could use a fish.
Could use anything.
*
We'll see what that does.
Also, I'm pondering the idea
of trapping birds.
All right, well I cut
part of my gill net off here,
and I got a little
piece of rope.
All I'm gonna do is just
kind of prop this gill net
up on this rock as best I can.
And then I'm gonna take some
bait and crush it up
and kind of throw it down
inside of this gill net
so a bird, when he lands, has
to land on top of the gill net
and we'll see if
he gets tangled up.
It seems to tangle just about
everything else up.
So we'll see if
it can get a bird.
*
I don't care
what kind of bird I catch.
I just want to catch
something, man.
I don't even care
if it's a bird,
I just want protein,
that's all I want.
I just want something to eat.
*
How long can a person go
out here?
*
If there wasn't a tap button,
you might go--you know,
guy might be able to go another
couple of weeks, who knows?
*
I mean, you'd go
till you die, right?
*
- They say if you do something
for three months,
it's no longer an experience.
It's a lifestyle change.
*
And that's kind of how this
is starting to feel.
*
My lifestyle is now
the hermit of Desolation Cove.
*
Physically, I am getting
weaker and weaker.
*
It's getting to the point where
my body's starting
to really ache and really hurt.
*
I'm feeling my age.
*
Everything that I do--
all the tasks,
all the energy that's
being expended,
is coming from me,
and there's not
a whole lot of me left.
*
But if I take a rest from it,
I don't eat.
*
If I don't go fishing today,
I don't eat.
I literally am living
hand to mouth.
*
I've lost a lot of muscle mass,
and to have to stand there
all day and do a task
like fishing...
it's painful.
*
Maybe a younger man would have
a better time at it.
I don't know.
*
There's a lot
riding on me staying...
unbroken out here.
If I allow myself
to get injured, I'm done.
*
Yes!
*
No!
Ugh!
Oh, my knees.
Ugh.
[moans]
*
[dramatic music]
*
- Yes!
*
No!
Ugh!
*
Oh, he came off the hook!
Ugh!
Oh, and I banged
my knees bad.
Oh.
Ugh.
Oh, that hurts.
Oh, he fell off the hook!
Oh, they're here,
oh, my knees.
Ugh.
Ugh.
You know, I'm 50.
It's got to...
it's got to put a drag
on anybody.
It's gonna take a while
just to recover from this,
and I wonder how much
my body can take.
*
- When you watch this at home,
it must seem so easy.
"Well, all he's got to do is
just gut it up and sit there."
*
It's not that easy, man.
I've already
been out here 60 days.
It ain't like
it's been a week.
It ain't like
it's been 10 days.
It's been 60
frickin' days, man.
*
I hope my friends
and family are proud of me...
for how difficult
a journey this has been.
Holy crap!
Holy crap.
What the hell have I done?
It takes a long time
to get your feet wet
when you're first
being dropped.
Red alert, stick--God.
[bleep].
Piece of [bleep].
Get the [bleep] out of my way,
you [bleep].
At first, it's more physical
than it is mental.
*
[bleep] you.
You're starving.
All I think about is food.
I've never been
this hungry ever.
Little baby fish.
Oh, and I let him go!
The emotional aspects
of being alone, so far,
haven't really
reared is ugly head with me.
I have a mouse in my house.
That stupid mouse follows me
when I come down here.
I'll turn around,
and there's the freaking mouse.
I swear to God,
if that thing freaking chews
my sleeping bag up,
I'm blowing this place up.
I'm gonna have to make a change.
It's not the world
that needs to change;
it's me that needs to change.
It's my outlook on life.
*
And I hope while I'm here,
it will help me find
what that outlook needs to be.
[laughs]
Oh, my God.
To get out of that
confining space,
to be able to see this, man...
just the emotional uplifting
this is gonna give me is huge.
This new location
has given my self-esteem
an incredible boost.
That's a big one.
Oh, man, that's
pretty good, actually.
*
Sure is pretty country.
There's things worse
I could be looking at.
*
Bazinga!
Just frickin' squished
like a damn pancake, baby.
Yeah!
This is the toughest physical
challenge I've ever done.
*
If you look up "wore out"
in the dictionary,
my face is right there,
just like a mug shot.
Just wore out.
*
Once you get
really far into it,
then it becomes very,
very mental.
Damn it.
My needs on day 50
are completely different
than on day 30,
because my mental aspect
is going down the tubes.
I'm struggling
with giving it all I got,
'cause there damn sure
ain't a lot left,
I can tell you that right now.
*
I don't remember ever
giving up anything in my life.
My wife's gonna be--
in her heart,
I know she's gonna be...
I know she's gonna be
disappointed in me.
[fire crackling]
I just feel like I'm
letting her down so bad, man.
Please, God, help me.
Please help me.
[sobbing]
Please, God.
Please.
[sobs]
I knew I needed
me suffering in my life
here, in this journey,
in order to change.
*
This journey has opened my eyes
to just how lucky
and how fortunate I am.
I need to stop being
such a half-empty kind of guy
and just be more positive.
*
I can either lose this...
[sighs]
Or I can gut it out
and win it.
*
I freaking want to win.
I want to win this bad.
What I have to do
is just man up
and go as long as I can.
*
But survival here
is not easy.
It's just not easy.
*
* How long can I take it?
* How long can I
take it out here? *
* How long
can you take it, boy? *
* How long can I take it
out here? *
Not very much
[bleep] longer, man.
Not very much.
*
*
- When I went down
after that fish,
I injured myself severely.
I bruised my knee
something fierce,
and I got to wait a couple days
for these knees to kind of
heal up a little bit.
I wonder how much
my body can take,
and at what point I would
start being very unwise
to continue.
I wasn't in bad shape
when I came out here.
I had been working out
steadily for months,
getting ready
for the potential
to maybe do something
like this.
Thank you for the ride.
So that's it.
You're just, like,
gonna leave me here?
You're just leaving?
I am home.
This is hard work.
This is not
an easy thing to do,
and it's unrelenting,
is what it is.
*
Oh, my goodness.
But if I can't make
this cove produce food,
I won't make it.
That's the catch of the day.
Some kind of
gnarly-looking seaweed.
Starvation really does
get to you.
My body's disappearing,
and it is scary.
There is nothing in my gill net.
It mocks me.
I want to do well,
and I'm sick of being the dad
that always has to say no.
"Hey, can we go out--"
no, you can't.
"Dad, can I have--"
no, you can't.
Can't afford it.
So, yeah, that prize money
would be huge.
Two weeks out here
and no fish to show for it.
That's embarrassing.
I have to learn
how to fish these waters.
I'm really hungry.
*
Yeah, baby!
I'm going to have a meal!
I'm going to have a meal!
Oh, that is good.
I haven't been able
to fish these waters
close to a week or so.
My gill net has been destroyed
every place I've put it.
This cove tears everything
to shreds
again, and again, and again.
Part of me just is
screaming to go home.
But I can't do that to my kids.
I pray for my kids
every night.
*
And I really miss 'em.
*
That's the hardest thing
about being here.
Everything else,
I can handle.
I can't bail...
on the opportunity...
to help my kids
the way I can
if I just
see this thing through.
I'm just going to focus in on
my little tiny universe here
and making life
as good as I can in it.
What's your Sleep Number?
*
The only thing that's
worked for me so far
to get food out of the cove
is a hook and a line.
Yes, that's number six, folks!
Whoo!
Suffice to say,
this is the feast of a lifetime.
This place, it changes.
It's kind to you,
and then it's rough to you.
It's like a very fickle place.
It can turn on a dime.
I lost my line.
Damn.
Whoa.
Oh.
Ugh.
Oh, I just fell in.
Hypothermia
is a very real threat.
I mean, I'm feeling
the cold right now.
The weather
just has been brutal.
We haven't had cold like this
in the daytime
since I've been here.
It's weather like this
that makes people tap out.
Kind of a crappy day to be here
in Desolation Cove.
It puts the "desolation" in
Desolation Cove, definitely.
In the beginning,
there was lots of days
which I didn't eat anything.
There was lots of opportunity
and fish and things going on
out there, I just didn't know
what to do with it.
I didn't know how to get it.
And now that I do, I'm
consistently hitting on fish.
That's how survival goes.
[growls]
Dinner!
I know that, emotionally,
this is getting more difficult.
Definitely.
There's that hierarchy
of human needs.
If you don't have air, you're
not gonna think about water.
If you don't have water, you're
not gonna think about food.
If I have food,
then I start doing things
like missing my kids.
I start thinking about
the fact that I'm alone.
I'm beginning to understand
and learn
how human contact
is a basic human need,
that we really do need
this social interaction.
We're social creatures,
and we're not designed
to live alone.
*
Missing my kids
is wearing on me.
*
The daily strain
is, you know,
wearing on me.
It's hard work.
Recovering from
an ordeal like this at 50
is not the same
as recovering at 25.
I know that for a fact,
that it's gonna take me longer
to get back into decent shape.
It's gonna take more effort,
and it's gonna take
some discipline.
And the longer this goes,
the harder that will be.
And I...
I'm looking forward to the day
when this is done.
One way or the other.
*
[wind whistling]
*
- Oh, God,
I feel like puking.
*
All right,
settle down.
*
I ain't never
quit nothing in my life.
*
- I need to ignore
the fact that I have
that little black phone
in there,
which is could use to call...
base camp and tap out.
It's a matter of, yet again,
confronting the fact that I'm
out here surviving by myself.
*
Until I get rescued.
*
- [sighs]
*
Do I want to?
Can I?
I'd like to.
My mind won't let me, man.
*
- Wow.
*
I mean, the level of exhaustion
is off the charts right now.
And my neck is killing me.
*
*
*
[dramatic music]
*
*
- I did the best I could, man.
[crying]
I did the best I could, man.
[sobs]
- Mother Nature,
she's a tough cookie, eh?
- Yeah, yeah.
*
Mentally, I broke.
I didn't just quit, I broke.
*
It's just been emotionally
trying, dealing with all
the cravings and all the hunger,
and I'm just done with it.
I'm starving.
I don't need to go hungry
anymore.
I'm done.
*
The only reason
that I wanted to tap
was because I was gonna die.
I was gonna have
no calories left.
You can't tap until you leave
everything out there, man.
If you tap before you leave
everything out there,
what the hell
did you sign up for?
*
Being out here
has, indeed, humbled me.
It has made me realize
that I'm not quite as tough
as I think I am.
I don't have the skills that
some of the other folks do,
but I got some
pretty good willpower.
What I've really discovered
about myself is that...
I have to focus on
what my wife talks about
all the time.
Just stop worrying
about the fact
that you're grinding away
and working,
and just think about
the little things in life.
And what I've come--
and I've always known this--
but my family
is frickin' awesome.
And I need to start showing
my appreciation for that.
This has been the haest thing
I've ever done
in my entire life.
This'll be one of the greatest
achievements I've ever done.
But it's just super,
super disappointing
I couldn't make it
to the very end.
It's like I always
tell my kids
when they were
in sports, you know?
Leave it all on the field.
Did you give it your all?
If you did your best,
that's all you can do.
You can't ever do
more than your best.
I did my best, man.
That's all I can say.
*
*
- How do I answer
the question,
"How long could I
survive out here?"
Well, I don't know.
*
Keep going, David,
keep going.
Don't stop now.
*
This is hard.
I get hungry during the day,
and I miss my children,
and I don't have any body
reserves to draw on anymore.
*
So if I don't get food
going in,
I have to burn me,
and I don't have a whole lot
of me left to burn.
*
But to give up...
I feel like I would be
giving up on my kids' future,
or a chance at that future,
and I just can't
bring myself to do that.
It's not about
the money for me.
It's about the money
for my kids.
Because right now, I don't have
any way to help them
go to college,
and to me, that is huge.
*
Yes!
Thank you, Lord.
Look at the size
of this fish.
I have stew tonight!
*
I think I'll know
when I'm not making it anymore.
But right now,
I feel like I am.
*
- 104 over 72
is your heart rate--
uh, blood pressure, sorry.
*
- I got a lot of questions
about recovering
from a thing like this,
but I guess that can wait
for, uh, me to actually
be done with it.
I'm not done yet.
*
You know,
heading into day 70 soon,
and I feel like
I could keep going.
*
Of all the people that get
a chance to do this thing,
I get a chance to do it.
*
You know, other people
that applied for this thing
and maybe got
a chance to do it--
I get to do it.
So, yeah,
I want to do this.
Why go home now?
I'm eating crab--I am eating
Dungeness crabs
practically every night.
Why would I go home now?
*
You know, somebody said to me
right before I left,
"Boy, 50 doesn't
slow you down at all."
And I'm like, "Yeah, baby."
You know, that's what...
[tree branch cracking]
*
[exhales sharply]
[dramatic music]
*
- Why go home now?
*
You know, somebody said to me
right before I left,
"Boy, 50 doesn't
slow you down at all."
And I'm like, "Yeah, baby."
You know, that's what...
[tree branch cracking]
*
[exhales sharply]
Oh!
- [crying]
- I did this for you guys.
You know that, right?
- [crying]
- Oh, my goodness.
- [sobs]
*
You did it.
- I did it.
- You did it.
*
- And you came all this way
just to tell me that.
Oh, my goodness.
*
Oh.
*
I get to go in that boat
today, don't I?
- You're coming home.
- I get to come home.
Oh, my goodness.
*
- So I want to see
what you did.
- Let's see what I do.
- I do.
- Let see how I lived.
- I've been waiting.
*
- This is my cove.
*
- It is absolutely beautiful.
- Yeah, it doesn't always
look like this.
- [laughs]
- It does not always--
when it's sleeting and the wind
is howling through here
and stuff--
no, this is idyllic.
This is, like,
the perfect day.
*
I've never had money
in my life,
so I have really no idea
what I would do if I had money.
I'm pretty enthusiastic
about figuring it out.
Now, there's some things
I want to do
to help you guys,
and, uh...
Yeah, beyond that,
I don't know.
I mean, I just...
I just have to survive that.
*
[helicopter propeller whirring]
*
I'm ready to go home.
Yes, we get to ride
in a helicopter.
*
*
I do have a love/hate
relationship with this place.
You get up in the morning,
and you confront the realities
of your situation.
Some days it's great,
and some days it's horrible.
But suffering has value.
We avoid it at all costs.
We would never want to go back
and repeat it,
but it has value.
It's a part of life.
And nobody gets through life
without suffering.
Nobody.
The question is, what do you
allow it to do in you?
You can allow that suffering
to make you bitter,
angry...
just a wretched person.
You know, you can
allow that suffering
to eat away at your soul.
Turn in on itself
and just chew you apart.
Or you can look for
the deeper meaning in it.
My philosophy on suffering
is that God's trying
to teach me something.
And I know that...
I know that, in the end...
I get to keep those lessons.
And the pain goes away.
*
*
- Oh, back in the world
of laws.
I was bound by a different set
of laws out there.
I was bound by
the laws of nature.
I was bound by
the laws of the wind
and the tide and the weather.
Nature dictates
its own terms to you.
You know, it was
allowing me to survive
in that cove on its terms.
*
The thought of my kids
kept me going
the whole time
I was out there.
There was a lot of days where
doubt and fear of quitting
would come up,
and I would just think of
Karina, Daniel, and Erin...
and how they gave me
the freedom.
They knew
that I had to do this.
And I get to go over there now
and tell them
it's all gonna be different,
and that feels really good.
I'm really looking forward
to this moment.
*
I missed you guys so much.
- I missed you, too.
- Oh.
Get in here, girl.
*
- My God, you look so different.
- Daniel, what happened to you?
You're like a foot taller.
- [laughs]
- Seriously.
I'm done,
I'm out of the bush.
I'm home.
I'm gonna be here
for a while now.
What's the news?
What's been going on?
So did you think
I'd be gone this long?
- No.
- Yeah, you thought
I'd be back sooner?
You thought I was gonna win.
Well...
I did.
- What?
- I won.
- [cries]
- Wow.
*
- Everybody else left.
Except for me.
*
- I know you--
I wish I knew it!
I wish I knew it.
I didn't know--
I didn't know I could do it.
You guys gave me
the confidence to do this.
Daniel, Karina,
I am now the dad who says yes.
[both laughing]
Okay?
I'm the dad of yes.
"Dad, can we do it?"
Yes.
From now on,
everything's different.
*
I am totally at peace
with my world right now.
I have seen my kids.
I'm just riding this wave
of exhilaration.
Nothing can bring me down.
The bush is something which
will always be in my blood,
but I regained
a sense of gratitude
for the life
that we have out here.
*
I certainly value
human company
more than I ever have before.
*
Human company is something
we can't afford
to take for granted.
The most valuable facet of your
life are your relationships.
*
And to not value them
is a real detriment
to quality of life.
And I realize that now
more than ever.
*
*
- Yes!
The biggest rock bass
I have ever caught!
Physically, I can hold my own
for a long time doing this.
But emotionally, this is
getting more difficult.
The isolation
is getting to me.
- This is all I can handle!
I'm starving.
It's getting worse
day, by day, by day.
Please, God, help me.
I can either lose this,
or I can gut it out and win it.
I want to win this bad.
- Oh, boy.
My whole gill net is out.
I'm gonna try
to set it up from the kayak.
*
[yelps]
[screams]
*
- Who are you when everything's
been stripped away?
[bleep].
- It's basically fighting
an inner battle all day long.
- It's scary out here
in these woods.
- I have not had
a serious meal in a week.
- If I can't get a fire,
then I can't stay here.
- It's always in the back
of your mind,
"Well, I could tap out."
- Putting up
with this filming bull[bleep]?
- Running into a predator,
it's not an if.
It's a when.
Get the hell out of here.
I see you.
Get out of here!
- I'm leaving this place.
- [moans]
- That prize money
would be huge.
Yes!
[growls]
- Believe me,
I'll keep fighting.
Every step of the way,
I'll keep fighting.
Whoo!
- $500,000 can make things
better for us.
*
- How long is long enough?
*
*
- Ah!
Oh.
I am drenched
in freezing cold water.
*
About 85%
of my clothing is wet.
*
Once they're wet,
they're very difficult to dry
in this environment.
*
*
Right now,
I feel pretty weak.
I'm like an old, old man.
*
[boat engine rumbling]
*
Oh, I'm sorry, Shauna.
I'm sorry.
I tried.
The water is freezing.
*
Sorry to to my love, Shauna.
To my family, my son.
My friends,
everybody I let down.
I was pretty sure
I was gonna be here
for a number of more days,
but all my wool clothing
is on me.
My thermal clothing is on me.
*
And most important,
the only pair of boots
that are dry are wet inside.
Tonight, I wouldn't...
I wouldn't make it.
*
[groans]
It's devastating
when you tried so hard.
You lost so much weight,
as I have lost.
So much strength.
Like, really ruining my body
just to push it
one more day
and another more day.
For love.
*
I would do anything
for my family.
And I did.
*
I didn't quit because
I ran out of love, did I?
I ran out of body heat.
*
I mean, like I said,
it's the bush.
Things just happen.
You plan and plan and plan
and then the bush finds a way
to surprise you, anyway.
*
Some things work out,
and some things don't.
*
In the end,
nature rules.
We're just part of it.
*
*
- You got that $500,000
reward over here.
"Hey, look at me."
*
"You want to tap?
"You could have
100, 200, 300, 400,
$500,000, boy."
*
"$500,000.
"If you want to
sell your house...
you could with me."
*
[grunts]
Going nuts out here, man.
Frickin' nuts.
*
But I owe it to myself
to give it, you know,
110% out here.
So that's why I'm not
gonna tap today.
What I think
I'm gonna do today is,
I think I'm gonna make
at least one hand line.
What I'm gonna do
is tie a rock to the bottom
of the fishing line,
tie probably four hooks up,
tie that piece of styrofoam up
at the top to be a float,
and then I'll just tie
that line off to a rock
or something over there.
You never know.
I mean, it could be--
I could get a fish out of it.
I'm pretty hungry,
I could use a fish.
Could use anything.
*
We'll see what that does.
Also, I'm pondering the idea
of trapping birds.
All right, well I cut
part of my gill net off here,
and I got a little
piece of rope.
All I'm gonna do is just
kind of prop this gill net
up on this rock as best I can.
And then I'm gonna take some
bait and crush it up
and kind of throw it down
inside of this gill net
so a bird, when he lands, has
to land on top of the gill net
and we'll see if
he gets tangled up.
It seems to tangle just about
everything else up.
So we'll see if
it can get a bird.
*
I don't care
what kind of bird I catch.
I just want to catch
something, man.
I don't even care
if it's a bird,
I just want protein,
that's all I want.
I just want something to eat.
*
How long can a person go
out here?
*
If there wasn't a tap button,
you might go--you know,
guy might be able to go another
couple of weeks, who knows?
*
I mean, you'd go
till you die, right?
*
- They say if you do something
for three months,
it's no longer an experience.
It's a lifestyle change.
*
And that's kind of how this
is starting to feel.
*
My lifestyle is now
the hermit of Desolation Cove.
*
Physically, I am getting
weaker and weaker.
*
It's getting to the point where
my body's starting
to really ache and really hurt.
*
I'm feeling my age.
*
Everything that I do--
all the tasks,
all the energy that's
being expended,
is coming from me,
and there's not
a whole lot of me left.
*
But if I take a rest from it,
I don't eat.
*
If I don't go fishing today,
I don't eat.
I literally am living
hand to mouth.
*
I've lost a lot of muscle mass,
and to have to stand there
all day and do a task
like fishing...
it's painful.
*
Maybe a younger man would have
a better time at it.
I don't know.
*
There's a lot
riding on me staying...
unbroken out here.
If I allow myself
to get injured, I'm done.
*
Yes!
*
No!
Ugh!
Oh, my knees.
Ugh.
[moans]
*
[dramatic music]
*
- Yes!
*
No!
Ugh!
*
Oh, he came off the hook!
Ugh!
Oh, and I banged
my knees bad.
Oh.
Ugh.
Oh, that hurts.
Oh, he fell off the hook!
Oh, they're here,
oh, my knees.
Ugh.
Ugh.
You know, I'm 50.
It's got to...
it's got to put a drag
on anybody.
It's gonna take a while
just to recover from this,
and I wonder how much
my body can take.
*
- When you watch this at home,
it must seem so easy.
"Well, all he's got to do is
just gut it up and sit there."
*
It's not that easy, man.
I've already
been out here 60 days.
It ain't like
it's been a week.
It ain't like
it's been 10 days.
It's been 60
frickin' days, man.
*
I hope my friends
and family are proud of me...
for how difficult
a journey this has been.
Holy crap!
Holy crap.
What the hell have I done?
It takes a long time
to get your feet wet
when you're first
being dropped.
Red alert, stick--God.
[bleep].
Piece of [bleep].
Get the [bleep] out of my way,
you [bleep].
At first, it's more physical
than it is mental.
*
[bleep] you.
You're starving.
All I think about is food.
I've never been
this hungry ever.
Little baby fish.
Oh, and I let him go!
The emotional aspects
of being alone, so far,
haven't really
reared is ugly head with me.
I have a mouse in my house.
That stupid mouse follows me
when I come down here.
I'll turn around,
and there's the freaking mouse.
I swear to God,
if that thing freaking chews
my sleeping bag up,
I'm blowing this place up.
I'm gonna have to make a change.
It's not the world
that needs to change;
it's me that needs to change.
It's my outlook on life.
*
And I hope while I'm here,
it will help me find
what that outlook needs to be.
[laughs]
Oh, my God.
To get out of that
confining space,
to be able to see this, man...
just the emotional uplifting
this is gonna give me is huge.
This new location
has given my self-esteem
an incredible boost.
That's a big one.
Oh, man, that's
pretty good, actually.
*
Sure is pretty country.
There's things worse
I could be looking at.
*
Bazinga!
Just frickin' squished
like a damn pancake, baby.
Yeah!
This is the toughest physical
challenge I've ever done.
*
If you look up "wore out"
in the dictionary,
my face is right there,
just like a mug shot.
Just wore out.
*
Once you get
really far into it,
then it becomes very,
very mental.
Damn it.
My needs on day 50
are completely different
than on day 30,
because my mental aspect
is going down the tubes.
I'm struggling
with giving it all I got,
'cause there damn sure
ain't a lot left,
I can tell you that right now.
*
I don't remember ever
giving up anything in my life.
My wife's gonna be--
in her heart,
I know she's gonna be...
I know she's gonna be
disappointed in me.
[fire crackling]
I just feel like I'm
letting her down so bad, man.
Please, God, help me.
Please help me.
[sobbing]
Please, God.
Please.
[sobs]
I knew I needed
me suffering in my life
here, in this journey,
in order to change.
*
This journey has opened my eyes
to just how lucky
and how fortunate I am.
I need to stop being
such a half-empty kind of guy
and just be more positive.
*
I can either lose this...
[sighs]
Or I can gut it out
and win it.
*
I freaking want to win.
I want to win this bad.
What I have to do
is just man up
and go as long as I can.
*
But survival here
is not easy.
It's just not easy.
*
* How long can I take it?
* How long can I
take it out here? *
* How long
can you take it, boy? *
* How long can I take it
out here? *
Not very much
[bleep] longer, man.
Not very much.
*
*
- When I went down
after that fish,
I injured myself severely.
I bruised my knee
something fierce,
and I got to wait a couple days
for these knees to kind of
heal up a little bit.
I wonder how much
my body can take,
and at what point I would
start being very unwise
to continue.
I wasn't in bad shape
when I came out here.
I had been working out
steadily for months,
getting ready
for the potential
to maybe do something
like this.
Thank you for the ride.
So that's it.
You're just, like,
gonna leave me here?
You're just leaving?
I am home.
This is hard work.
This is not
an easy thing to do,
and it's unrelenting,
is what it is.
*
Oh, my goodness.
But if I can't make
this cove produce food,
I won't make it.
That's the catch of the day.
Some kind of
gnarly-looking seaweed.
Starvation really does
get to you.
My body's disappearing,
and it is scary.
There is nothing in my gill net.
It mocks me.
I want to do well,
and I'm sick of being the dad
that always has to say no.
"Hey, can we go out--"
no, you can't.
"Dad, can I have--"
no, you can't.
Can't afford it.
So, yeah, that prize money
would be huge.
Two weeks out here
and no fish to show for it.
That's embarrassing.
I have to learn
how to fish these waters.
I'm really hungry.
*
Yeah, baby!
I'm going to have a meal!
I'm going to have a meal!
Oh, that is good.
I haven't been able
to fish these waters
close to a week or so.
My gill net has been destroyed
every place I've put it.
This cove tears everything
to shreds
again, and again, and again.
Part of me just is
screaming to go home.
But I can't do that to my kids.
I pray for my kids
every night.
*
And I really miss 'em.
*
That's the hardest thing
about being here.
Everything else,
I can handle.
I can't bail...
on the opportunity...
to help my kids
the way I can
if I just
see this thing through.
I'm just going to focus in on
my little tiny universe here
and making life
as good as I can in it.
What's your Sleep Number?
*
The only thing that's
worked for me so far
to get food out of the cove
is a hook and a line.
Yes, that's number six, folks!
Whoo!
Suffice to say,
this is the feast of a lifetime.
This place, it changes.
It's kind to you,
and then it's rough to you.
It's like a very fickle place.
It can turn on a dime.
I lost my line.
Damn.
Whoa.
Oh.
Ugh.
Oh, I just fell in.
Hypothermia
is a very real threat.
I mean, I'm feeling
the cold right now.
The weather
just has been brutal.
We haven't had cold like this
in the daytime
since I've been here.
It's weather like this
that makes people tap out.
Kind of a crappy day to be here
in Desolation Cove.
It puts the "desolation" in
Desolation Cove, definitely.
In the beginning,
there was lots of days
which I didn't eat anything.
There was lots of opportunity
and fish and things going on
out there, I just didn't know
what to do with it.
I didn't know how to get it.
And now that I do, I'm
consistently hitting on fish.
That's how survival goes.
[growls]
Dinner!
I know that, emotionally,
this is getting more difficult.
Definitely.
There's that hierarchy
of human needs.
If you don't have air, you're
not gonna think about water.
If you don't have water, you're
not gonna think about food.
If I have food,
then I start doing things
like missing my kids.
I start thinking about
the fact that I'm alone.
I'm beginning to understand
and learn
how human contact
is a basic human need,
that we really do need
this social interaction.
We're social creatures,
and we're not designed
to live alone.
*
Missing my kids
is wearing on me.
*
The daily strain
is, you know,
wearing on me.
It's hard work.
Recovering from
an ordeal like this at 50
is not the same
as recovering at 25.
I know that for a fact,
that it's gonna take me longer
to get back into decent shape.
It's gonna take more effort,
and it's gonna take
some discipline.
And the longer this goes,
the harder that will be.
And I...
I'm looking forward to the day
when this is done.
One way or the other.
*
[wind whistling]
*
- Oh, God,
I feel like puking.
*
All right,
settle down.
*
I ain't never
quit nothing in my life.
*
- I need to ignore
the fact that I have
that little black phone
in there,
which is could use to call...
base camp and tap out.
It's a matter of, yet again,
confronting the fact that I'm
out here surviving by myself.
*
Until I get rescued.
*
- [sighs]
*
Do I want to?
Can I?
I'd like to.
My mind won't let me, man.
*
- Wow.
*
I mean, the level of exhaustion
is off the charts right now.
And my neck is killing me.
*
*
*
[dramatic music]
*
*
- I did the best I could, man.
[crying]
I did the best I could, man.
[sobs]
- Mother Nature,
she's a tough cookie, eh?
- Yeah, yeah.
*
Mentally, I broke.
I didn't just quit, I broke.
*
It's just been emotionally
trying, dealing with all
the cravings and all the hunger,
and I'm just done with it.
I'm starving.
I don't need to go hungry
anymore.
I'm done.
*
The only reason
that I wanted to tap
was because I was gonna die.
I was gonna have
no calories left.
You can't tap until you leave
everything out there, man.
If you tap before you leave
everything out there,
what the hell
did you sign up for?
*
Being out here
has, indeed, humbled me.
It has made me realize
that I'm not quite as tough
as I think I am.
I don't have the skills that
some of the other folks do,
but I got some
pretty good willpower.
What I've really discovered
about myself is that...
I have to focus on
what my wife talks about
all the time.
Just stop worrying
about the fact
that you're grinding away
and working,
and just think about
the little things in life.
And what I've come--
and I've always known this--
but my family
is frickin' awesome.
And I need to start showing
my appreciation for that.
This has been the haest thing
I've ever done
in my entire life.
This'll be one of the greatest
achievements I've ever done.
But it's just super,
super disappointing
I couldn't make it
to the very end.
It's like I always
tell my kids
when they were
in sports, you know?
Leave it all on the field.
Did you give it your all?
If you did your best,
that's all you can do.
You can't ever do
more than your best.
I did my best, man.
That's all I can say.
*
*
- How do I answer
the question,
"How long could I
survive out here?"
Well, I don't know.
*
Keep going, David,
keep going.
Don't stop now.
*
This is hard.
I get hungry during the day,
and I miss my children,
and I don't have any body
reserves to draw on anymore.
*
So if I don't get food
going in,
I have to burn me,
and I don't have a whole lot
of me left to burn.
*
But to give up...
I feel like I would be
giving up on my kids' future,
or a chance at that future,
and I just can't
bring myself to do that.
It's not about
the money for me.
It's about the money
for my kids.
Because right now, I don't have
any way to help them
go to college,
and to me, that is huge.
*
Yes!
Thank you, Lord.
Look at the size
of this fish.
I have stew tonight!
*
I think I'll know
when I'm not making it anymore.
But right now,
I feel like I am.
*
- 104 over 72
is your heart rate--
uh, blood pressure, sorry.
*
- I got a lot of questions
about recovering
from a thing like this,
but I guess that can wait
for, uh, me to actually
be done with it.
I'm not done yet.
*
You know,
heading into day 70 soon,
and I feel like
I could keep going.
*
Of all the people that get
a chance to do this thing,
I get a chance to do it.
*
You know, other people
that applied for this thing
and maybe got
a chance to do it--
I get to do it.
So, yeah,
I want to do this.
Why go home now?
I'm eating crab--I am eating
Dungeness crabs
practically every night.
Why would I go home now?
*
You know, somebody said to me
right before I left,
"Boy, 50 doesn't
slow you down at all."
And I'm like, "Yeah, baby."
You know, that's what...
[tree branch cracking]
*
[exhales sharply]
[dramatic music]
*
- Why go home now?
*
You know, somebody said to me
right before I left,
"Boy, 50 doesn't
slow you down at all."
And I'm like, "Yeah, baby."
You know, that's what...
[tree branch cracking]
*
[exhales sharply]
Oh!
- [crying]
- I did this for you guys.
You know that, right?
- [crying]
- Oh, my goodness.
- [sobs]
*
You did it.
- I did it.
- You did it.
*
- And you came all this way
just to tell me that.
Oh, my goodness.
*
Oh.
*
I get to go in that boat
today, don't I?
- You're coming home.
- I get to come home.
Oh, my goodness.
*
- So I want to see
what you did.
- Let's see what I do.
- I do.
- Let see how I lived.
- I've been waiting.
*
- This is my cove.
*
- It is absolutely beautiful.
- Yeah, it doesn't always
look like this.
- [laughs]
- It does not always--
when it's sleeting and the wind
is howling through here
and stuff--
no, this is idyllic.
This is, like,
the perfect day.
*
I've never had money
in my life,
so I have really no idea
what I would do if I had money.
I'm pretty enthusiastic
about figuring it out.
Now, there's some things
I want to do
to help you guys,
and, uh...
Yeah, beyond that,
I don't know.
I mean, I just...
I just have to survive that.
*
[helicopter propeller whirring]
*
I'm ready to go home.
Yes, we get to ride
in a helicopter.
*
*
I do have a love/hate
relationship with this place.
You get up in the morning,
and you confront the realities
of your situation.
Some days it's great,
and some days it's horrible.
But suffering has value.
We avoid it at all costs.
We would never want to go back
and repeat it,
but it has value.
It's a part of life.
And nobody gets through life
without suffering.
Nobody.
The question is, what do you
allow it to do in you?
You can allow that suffering
to make you bitter,
angry...
just a wretched person.
You know, you can
allow that suffering
to eat away at your soul.
Turn in on itself
and just chew you apart.
Or you can look for
the deeper meaning in it.
My philosophy on suffering
is that God's trying
to teach me something.
And I know that...
I know that, in the end...
I get to keep those lessons.
And the pain goes away.
*
*
- Oh, back in the world
of laws.
I was bound by a different set
of laws out there.
I was bound by
the laws of nature.
I was bound by
the laws of the wind
and the tide and the weather.
Nature dictates
its own terms to you.
You know, it was
allowing me to survive
in that cove on its terms.
*
The thought of my kids
kept me going
the whole time
I was out there.
There was a lot of days where
doubt and fear of quitting
would come up,
and I would just think of
Karina, Daniel, and Erin...
and how they gave me
the freedom.
They knew
that I had to do this.
And I get to go over there now
and tell them
it's all gonna be different,
and that feels really good.
I'm really looking forward
to this moment.
*
I missed you guys so much.
- I missed you, too.
- Oh.
Get in here, girl.
*
- My God, you look so different.
- Daniel, what happened to you?
You're like a foot taller.
- [laughs]
- Seriously.
I'm done,
I'm out of the bush.
I'm home.
I'm gonna be here
for a while now.
What's the news?
What's been going on?
So did you think
I'd be gone this long?
- No.
- Yeah, you thought
I'd be back sooner?
You thought I was gonna win.
Well...
I did.
- What?
- I won.
- [cries]
- Wow.
*
- Everybody else left.
Except for me.
*
- I know you--
I wish I knew it!
I wish I knew it.
I didn't know--
I didn't know I could do it.
You guys gave me
the confidence to do this.
Daniel, Karina,
I am now the dad who says yes.
[both laughing]
Okay?
I'm the dad of yes.
"Dad, can we do it?"
Yes.
From now on,
everything's different.
*
I am totally at peace
with my world right now.
I have seen my kids.
I'm just riding this wave
of exhilaration.
Nothing can bring me down.
The bush is something which
will always be in my blood,
but I regained
a sense of gratitude
for the life
that we have out here.
*
I certainly value
human company
more than I ever have before.
*
Human company is something
we can't afford
to take for granted.
The most valuable facet of your
life are your relationships.
*
And to not value them
is a real detriment
to quality of life.
And I realize that now
more than ever.
*