All Hail King Julien: Exiled (2017): Season 1, Episode 7 - Cult Fiction - full transcript

𝒯𝓇𝒶𝓃𝓈𝓁𝒶𝓉e 𝓊𝓃𝒾𝒸𝒶𝓉 E𝒩𝒢LI𝒮H

I'm okay!

Stop the dancing and listen up.

Chapter siem.

Ah!

I can almost smell the kingdom

beneath the overwhelming stench

of borscht coming
from the kitchen.

Maurice! Get out here
and take a whiff.

No, thanks, Your Majesty.

I'm good right here.



What's with the frowny face?
Newsflash.

Everything's great.

We have an army,

and we're on our way to
Madagascar to fight Koto,

and get my kingdom back. Booyah!

All we need to do now
is get in contact

with Clover and
tell her the plan.

Uh, any luck, Ted?

No, nothing yet.

But I did have a
very pleasant chat

with a truck driver
named Darryl.

Forget the truck driver,
Ted, and find Clover.

Roger that.

Clover, do you copy? Come in, Clover.
Are you out there?



This is Ted, over.

Hmm?

Ow.

You okay, Pancho?

Yeah, you're acting weird.

Weirder than your usual weird.

I'm not the only one.

Is it me, or has the vibe
on this ship changed?

- Uh, nope.
- Yeah, Pancho.

Everything seems normal to me.

Well, as normal as being on a
zeppelin full of monkeys can be.

I'm telling you,

the monkeys are looking
at us differently.

You don't think that
they know, do you?

Know what?

- What we did.
- Huh?

- That we sabotaged the first zeppelin.
- Huh?

Oh, yeah. That.

Even if they don't know
for sure we did it,

maybe they're suspicious.

Relax, you guys.

They're just a bunch
of dumb space monkeys.

Huh?

There's no way, in
the entire universe,

throughout all time-space,
that they are suspicious.

I suspicious.

Da. Lemurs hiding something.

After we eat borscht,
Caesar learn truth.

This is happening!

Tie them up with your love.

And these ropes.

Don't want these
two gettin' away.

Uh, now would be a good
time to do something.

Don't you two have a
love-hate-love thing going on?

Try... appealing to
her as a friend.

- Oh.
- Your betrayal stings

like salt poured
into the open wound

of a thousand mewling sparrows.

You've forgotten your mission.

Somewhere, tears of
the Jarsh-Jarsh drown

the tomorrow of
yesterday's dreams.

No, no, no, Sage.

Can't you see, brother?
Jarsh-Jarsh has sent me here.

This is where I am
supposed to be.

This is happening.

This is happening.

Yeah, she's gone.

Uh, we're gonna have to, uh...
We'll fight our way out.

I'll go left, you go right.
Ready?

No. I swore these paws would
never perpetuate violence.

If I break that vow, my
soul is already dead.

Seriously?

No. Wait. Stop.

I started, "This is
Happening," remember?

Whose face is on the brochure?
Yeah. See? That's me.

Shouldn't you all
be listening to me?

You betrayed us.

- Wha...
- I'm in charge now.

Huh?

This is happening!

Uh. Uh.

This cannot be happening.

Easy, robot lady. Easy, now.

Timo, call off your robot, now!

- I can't.
- Get back to your room.

That's what I was trying
to tell you before.

She's gone haywire.

I programmed her to be a
doting mother/security system.

But somehow, she gained
sentience and...

Room. Now.

She's been keeping me a
prisoner in my own home.

Who are you

and what are you doing here?

I need to borrow
Timo's radio to...

You cannot use the radio.

But I need to try to
contact King Julien!

Who is this King Julien?

King Julien? Why? Where is he?

I don't know where he went. After
Koto took over the kingdom...

- Took over the kingdom?
- Nobody tells me anything.

And now Koto's going to marry
the Crocodile Princess.

At least someone around
here is getting married.

Which will make him

more powerful than ever.

If we don't do
something to stop him,

King Julien may never
get his kingdom back.

- Oh, no!
- Sheket. Sheket bevakasha.

You are an intruder.

And you must be destroyed.

No! Please!

Because you said please, I will
destroy you after breakfast.

Hamantaschen?

Hoo-ah.

I ain't never gonna squeal.
Never! I'm no rat.

Julien made me.

He ordered me to sabotage
the first zeppelin

and I rigged it to blow up.

I shouldn't, maybe,
have said that.

Aww, sheesh. That smarts.

Happening, happening, happening,
happening. Happening!

Oh. Hello, Sister Pam.

I was just doing my
daily happenations.

Hmm... I can see that.

And I have a level-three
happening session in five.

I am so close to
that free Froyo.

You know the toppings
are extra, right?

Yeah, yeah. The depressed rat in
the broom closet told me that.

Anyway, what can I do for you?

Well, as you know, I have become

the de facto leader
of the Happeners.

And as the leader,
I wanna ensure

that there are no
more disruptions.

- Of course. I want that, too.
- Right.

The thing is, you're
new around here.

How do I know you're
really loyal?

I turned in Sage and Fred for
being traitors, remember?

That doesn't mean anything.

Could just be your
way of getting in

and taking us down
from the inside.

It doesn't mean you're
a true Happener.

I am a true Happener.
I swear I am.

And you know what? I will do
anything to prove it. Anything!

Well, there is this one little
old thing you could do.

Get rid of Fred and Sage!
Permanently!

On it.

Oh.

Um, sorry. Didn't
realize you were doing

the whole, um, the laugh thing.

- Can I join?
- Of course.

I'll count you in.
Three, two, one.

Mmm. Oh, yum.

I haven't eaten in a while.

But even if I had, this would
still be really tasty.

Good job, Mom-Bot.

Why aren't you eating, Timo?

For the hundredth
time, I'm not hungry!

Don't use that tone with me.

You hear the way he speaks to me?
His own mother.

You'll never find a wife
with that attitude.

I'll never find a wife because
you won't let me out of here!

I want grandchildren!

Uh, anyway, thank
you for the food.

You're welcome, bubala. Have
some more kasha varnishkes.

Sure, you love him now,

but just five minutes ago,
you were gonna destroy him.

I changed my mind. A mother is
allowed to change her mind.

Do you see what I put up with?

Um...

No, yes.

Maybe I will not destroy Mort.

I am enjoying his
company too much.

It is nice to have someone around
the house who appreciates me.

Speaking of things
around the house,

could I, maybe, use
the radio now?

Keep eating!

All right, Pam. Now,
stand right here.

- Why?
- I'm going to give you a demonstration

of what I have planned for
tomorrow's execution.

I think you're really
gonna like it.

- Okay.
- Ready?

- Hmm.
- Imagine that this is Sage.

I'm Sage. I like to mumble

and say things that
don't make sense.

The broom in the wind,
and Namaste, and...

Y-Yeah, I get the idea.

Right. So, first, we'll
start off with this.

- Hmm.
- Then a little bit of this.

Followed by...

- Oh, it's gonna be so good.
- Uh-huh.

One question.

Wouldn't it be simpler to
just do it real quick?

No. Doing it my way
will set an example.

Show everyone what
happens to traitors.

They aren't just killed.

Oh, no. Oh, no. They are
elaborately killed.

Oh, you're good.

That kind of thinking is just
what the Happeners need.

See you tomorrow.

Wait a minute. Where am I?

That is a very good question.

Are you sure this is your path?

Yes, Jarsh-Jarsh,
I am a Happener.

For the first time in a
long time, I have clarity,

and a sense of... Om. Purpose.

I believe you have
another purpose.

But... But...

You sent me here, remember?

Isn't this where I'm supposed to be?
With the hmm...

and the haa...

You're so confusing! I
wish you would just...

Just leave me alone!

Very well.

Wait. What's going on?

Keep running.

See where this path
will lead you.

Huh?

Huh?

No. No!

This is what will happen

if you stay on this path.

Why didn't Clover do something?

Feet.

- Mort, get off.
- I love you!

No.

- It's all Clover's...
- Fault.

My turn. So, Mort,
what do you do?

Uh, well, I recently
wrote a play.

You hear that, Timo?

Mort wrote a whole play.
What have you done lately?

All this delicious iced tea

has really made me
have to go splishy.

I'll be right back.

Uh-uh-uh. What do you say?

Oh, uh, may I be excused?

Such a mensch.

You see that, Timo? Maybe
you should take some notes.

Uh-huh.

Mort could teach you a thing
or two about manners.

- You are excused.
- Yay!

Hmm.

If I were a radio,
where would I be?

Hmm? Hmm? Hmm?

Aw, nothin'.

Hmm.

Hello, King Julien?
Are you out there?

King Julien? King Julien?

Breaker, breaker.
This here is Darryl.

- Huh?
- Uh, come on back there, Teddy Bear.

King Julien?

Hello? Clover? Clover?

Just trying out my
new trucker lingo.

This is Teddy Bear.
Come on back.

- Ted. Is that you?
- Oh, golly. Mort.

Well, aren't you a
sound for sore ears.

Where's King Julien? I
need to talk to him!

Mort, you little freak.

Oh, King Julien, you're alive.
I knew you were alive.

- What's going on in the kingdom?
- Hi, Maurice.

Well, where to start?

Well, I wrote a play. Actually,
it was more like a space opera.

- Set on planet Kreptal...
- Get to the point, Mort.

Right. Right. The Crocodile
Ambassador made a deal with Koto.

So now Koto plans to marry
the Crocodile Princess

which would make his
empire unstoppable.

You have to hurry back
and stop the wedding.

Say what?

Hold on a sec, monkeys,

I'm on the phone.

The Crocodile Ambassador

is marrying off his daughter?
Oh, no...

Can you guys give
us space, please?

Don't worry, Mort. I'm
on my way to fight Koto,

and I've got a whole
army with me.

King Julien? King Julien.

Pancho, what did you do?

I told them everything, King Julien.
I'm sorry.

I'm weak. Weak!

You and friends lie.

You and friends make explosion.

You and friends will be execute.

"Will be execute"?
No! King Julien!

Who are you talking to?

Um... Darryl?

I said no radio!

Sorry.

Bring out the traitors.

Change of plans.

What are you doing? I knew
you couldn't be trusted.

I have been trusted to do what
is right for the Happeners.

And this, this is
not what's right.

'Cause I've got something better.
Reprogramming.

Fantastic. I couldn't agree...

Wait. Reprogramming?

Doesn't that involve
messing with our brains?

I-I like my brain as it is.
Sage?

I don't believe in attachments.

My brain is a citizen
of the world.

It can go where it wants.

We must make our numbers grow.

So that we can become
bigger and stronger.

So that we can
become unstoppable!

Unstoppable.

Yes!

See, I knew you'd understand.

- What is that?
- A reprogramming screen.

Built it myself. Always
been a bit handy.

Trust me, Pam. This
is what is best

for our brothers and sisters.

For our family. For your family.

How can you meditate
at a time like this?

What do we do?

Okay, everybody.

On my signal, make a run for...

Now! Go now!

Get them!

Guys, this way.

Not this way.

You guys almost killed me.

You said to follow you.

- You did. You did say that.
- Incoming!

Come on. There has to be
a way off this thing.

What if we got some
parachutes and just jumped?

Uh, I'm not loving that idea.

Gonna have to agree with
Maurice on that one.

Well, we can't just stand here.
Head for that boat.

Think we have time for a
bathroom break first?

I really gotta go!

No, Pancho.

King Julien, you
do remember that

we're very high up
in the air, right?

Of course I remember.

And you do remember that
boats can't fly, right?

Oh, shut it, Maurice.

- Hang onto your booties.
- Oh, no.

Finally, lemur gone. Now
we go back to Russia.

Hoo-ah.

Uh... You are gonna
wanna let that air out.

I do not tolerate
liars in my house.

Timo, get out...

- This way, Mort.
- My sciatica!

- What do we do?
- Don't worry. I have a plan.

I will distract her,
and all you have to do

is get inside her controls
compartment and shut her down.

Where's the control compartment?

That's the tricky part.
It's in her ear.

Seriously, nerd?

Yeah, I know. Next robot I
build will have a remote.

Maybe you should think about
not building any more robots!

Good point.

Where are you?

Timo.

I'm over here.

Okay, Mort, any time now.

What are you...

Get out of my head!

Get out of my head!

I'm in. So many wires.
Timo, what do I do?

Anything!

Wires and buttons. Buttons...

Why aren't you eating? Have you
put on weight? Cut your hair.

Have you met any
nice girls lately?

Your cousin married a doctor.

Mort, hurry!

You were always a disappointment
to me, Timo. Goodbye.

Here goes nothing.

We did it. We actually did it.

Oy.

King Julien.

King Julien? King Julien, are you there?
Answer me. Please.

Oh, no.

Listen here, you.

Open up those eyes, focus
in, and just look at it!

Look at it!

Whoa.

Can't look away.

Hey, wait. I feel nothing.

Hello, friend.

I feel different. I feel free.

That's right. You are free.

This isn't a
reprogramming device.

- It is a deprogramming device.
- Hmm?

See? Gotcha. Switched 'em. Yeah.

That's what I did, right there.

Thank you, Clover.

I can't believe I fell for this
stupid cult in the first place.

They told me I'd get a free TV.

All I had to do was
listen to the seminar.

Guys, I know that
"This is Happening"

was kind of a scam, but...

I have this new idea that's
going to blow your minds.

Tomorrow Starts Yesterday.

I am 100% on-board. Do
you take credit cards?

Then let's all go find
an abandoned office park

and set up shop, people.

Thank you for sparing my life.

Don't thank me,
thank Jarsh-Jarsh.

He found a way to reach
me and bring me back.

I know now what he was
trying to teach me

by sending me here.

- What?
- That we are a team.

I forgot that when I
sold you out to Pam.

But I won't forget it again.

The only way we're gonna defeat
Koto is if we work together.

You were right. Jarsh-Jarsh
really is wise.

Hmm?

Great. Great, you guys.
This is...

We're right back
where we started.

In the middle of the ocean!

Well, it's better than being
on a rickety old dirigible

with a bunch of hostile monkeys.

Oh, is it, Ted? Is it?
Is it really? Is it?

Oh, golly, what am I saying?
Of course it isn't.

It's the sun, King Julien.
I'm delirious.

Please forgive me.

Wait, where's Pancho?

Forget Pancho.

You heard what Mort said.

We need to get
back to my kingdom

and stop that wedding.

But how?