Agatha Raisin (2014–…): Season 2, Episode 1 - The Wizard of Evesham - full transcript
Agatha Raisin finds herself in Cotswold Fashion Bouq now a wizard is found dead.
Oh, my God.
The eagle has landed!
Oooh! Ooh!
The eagle has landed.
The eagle.
The eagle has landed!
James?
James.
Who are you?
DEIRDRA: Reggie!
Come to Mummy, darling.
There's a good boy.
Shh! Shh!
DEIRDRA: Ahh.
It's a behavioral response
to your overtly sexual aura.
You can't blame the poor dog.
I don't blame him.
I blame you!
You are trespassing!
Well, if you kept
your gate shut,
then he wouldn't have got in.
It's not my gate.
Then you're trespassing too.
Welcome home, Agatha.
[ Down-tempo classical music
playing ]
-Aggie!
-Oh!
ROY: She's home!
Right, all I know is that
you followed you to Cyprus
in case it all went pear-shaped
with James.
Oh, yeah, right.
So he didn't tell you the bit
about abandoning me
for Gorgeous Georgios?
He said he wanted to marry me.
I thought he was the one.
You abandoned me!
You chose a waiter
over your best friend!
-He was fit.
-Beautiful.
Did you -- Roy!
Did you bring him back here?
Oh, don't worry.
I steam-cleaned your mattress.
ROY:
When you bought the house back,
I knew you'd be away
for a while.
AGATHA:
Yeah, because I was in Cyprus!
I was lonely
and -- and feeling vulnerable.
And -- And, Roy,
I was in fear of my life!
What can I say?
It was love at first sight.
I wasn't thinking straight.
I was thinking very, very gay.
So where is he now?
Ohh.
Did a runner.
Yeah, with my wallet,
my fake Rolex, and the, um...
AGATHA:
Oh, come on, Roy.
Not my signed photograph
of Madonna?
Seriously?!
Is nothing sacred?
I'm sorry, Aggie.
I've let you down.
Yeah, well, good riddance.
'Cause all men are bastards.
Oh. Didn't go well
with Bill, then?
I-I don't want to talk about it.
I've got PTSD.
-Hey.
What happens in Cyprus
stays in Cyprus.
Just saying.
-You deserve better, Aggie.
-I know.
We all do.
Uhh!
I think we should just
sign off men for good.
-Single ladies club!
-AGATHA: I'm in!
-GEMMA: Ohh.
You can be honorary "member."
-"Member."
Yes, please.
AGATHA:
Well, as Madonna once said,
"Power is being told
that you're not loved
and then not being destroyed
by it."
Mmm, yeah, I'll drink to that.
To the Carsely
Single Ladies Society.
A life without men.
-A life without those bastards.
-A life without men!
ROY:
Come along, ladies.
My party.
SARAH: Sorry, James.
What fish?
I can't really hear you.
Yeah, no, it looks like
she's definitely back.
I don't want to be
your go-between.
Just call her, James.
Please.
James?
-Ja--
MRS. BOGGLE:
Come on, girls.
-I have done it before.
-It lives!
-Oh.
ROY: Good morning!
Do you know,
much as I love you guys,
I could really do with a little
bit of time on my own right now.
No, Ags. You're hurting.
You need our support.
It's single ladies together,
remember?
Do you not have a child?
Mm, Guide camp.
And you're here because...?
Oh, 'cause it's lush.
And your TV's bigger than mine.
I can't face London now, Aggie.
My heart is broken.
It's shattered into
tiny little pieces,
so I'm taking
a couple of days off work.
Do you know what?
Uh, I really -- I really need
to do quite a lot of thinking.
Mrs. Raisin.
Welcome home!
Mr. Lacey not with you?
-No. Oh! God.
!
Oh!
What the heck?
See?
You need us to protect you.
Settle down,
settle down, settle down.
Mrs. Raisin has
nothing further to say
and trusts
you will respect her privacy
at this very difficult time.
Thank you very much.
Thank you.
MRS. BOGGLE: What do you mean,
difficult time?
What?! Really!
No one gave a damn
about what I did in London.
Well, that's the charm
and the curse of village life.
But how am I gonna
get rid of them?
Roy and Gemma
are dealing with it.
For now.
You'll just
have to front it out.
How?
The village ladies society
are meeting today.
-You are joking.
-But they're like family.
I wasn't that keen
on my own family.
Come on.
We've got a concert to plan,
and you have such great ideas.
Right, well,
here's one for nothing.
Let's plan not to do it!
You really are in a bad way.
Have you -- have you heard
anything from James?
Oh, just the odd text
about the garden,
building maintenance,
stuff like that.
So nothing?
Nothing about
James is not the man
I thought he was.
All the more reason for you
to come today.
Show those gossips
that you're over him.
Mrs. Bloxby was telling me
about your new club.
Yes, but you have to
be single, Beryl.
Mr. Boggle and I
are on a break.
-He never liked Sergio.
-Her budgie.
Came home from Zumba,
he was nowhere to be seen.
Bernard said he'd flown away
but I found blue feathers
down the waste disposal.
He did not!
Evil old goat.
Banished him to his sister's
in Moreton.
Well, I always knew
he was a bit strange,
but I never saw him
as a budgie killer.
You can never
truly trust a man.
They're all barbarians at heart.
I couldn't agree more.
Boggle, you're in.
Well, if everyone's got tea,
I'd like to
open the meeting, please.
Well, I think that concludes
our business.
Soz. Soz.
Hi, Gemma.
Didn't think you were coming.
No, neither did I.
Roy made me.
All that does is leave me to say
many thanks to Mrs. Boggle
for agreeing to organize
our annual concert.
And to Mrs. Darry for agreeing
to do the teas.
Now we just need
some performers.
I can play the recorder,
as usual.
Gemma?
I could do my Lady Gaga
if you're desperate.
I, um -- I-I could read
some Pam Ayres.
Oh, that's lovely, Liza.
Thank you so much.
-Oh, you know, uh...
"Ohh, I wish I'd looked after
my teeth."
I know that.
I mean who's that?
Oh, uh, yeah, Liza Friendly.
She moved to Carsely
around Christmastime.
Bit beige,
but basically harmless.
DEIRDRA:
What about you, Mrs. Raisin?
Surely our local celebrity
must have some party piece
up her sleeve?
Oh, I'm afraid, Mrs. Darry,
I don't have any talent.
-Neither do they.
Doesn't stop them.
Okay, I think
we'll leave it there, ladies.
There are forms by the door for
anyone who'd like to sign up.
Thanks so much.
Um, just let me
introduce you to Agatha.
Agatha, I don't think you've met
Deirdra Darry.
She's taken over
Vale View Pharmacy in Evesham.
Yes.
Our paths have crossed.
Oh, sorry, I had no idea
you were Carsely's
famous, well-coiffed sleuth.
-Not with those roots.
-Huh.
Right, pardon my French now,
Mrs. Vicar,
but that woman is a total bitch.
Ohh. Look at this mess.
It's all the stress.
I have let myself go.
Come on, it just needs
a little attention.
Oh, actually,
somebody recommended
a marvelous new stylist
in Evesham.
I've got his card somewhere.
Yep, Jonny Shawpart.
There you go.
I've heard he's overrated,
overpriced.
-He thinks he's God's gift.
-That's every man I've ever met.
Yeah, well, I don't care
if he's a serial killer
if he can sort out this mess.
Here for the special?
Is this Studio JS?
No. That's further down
the high street.
This is Eve of Evesham.
But I can squeeze you in
for a cut and color?
No one does a purple rinse
like Eve.
Do you know, I'm not quite sure
I'm there yet.
There comes a time
when you have to
embrace your age, Mrs. Raisin,
not hide from it.
Oh, Sir Charles,
you shouldn't have!
Well, they're for Agatha,
actually.
Well, she's -- she's not in.
Well, perhaps you can
take them for her.
-Nice tan.
-Hard to avoid.
Cyprus is bloody hot.
No.
No, she didn't.
* Whoo *
Knock, knock.
Agatha Raisin.
I'm seeing Jonny at 3:00.
Oh, yeah, I can see why you
needed an emergency appointment.
Jonny?
Jonny,
your three o'clock's here.
Heh.
Your skin tone could take
a much richer color, Agatha.
-It's a cool name, by the way.
Thank you.
And I'm thinking something
more dramatic stylewise.
Yeah, to be honest,
I could do with a change.
There's a woman on the phone.
Says she's left
loads of messages.
I said no interruptions.
She says it's important. I could
start the color if you like.
My client is paying
for a consultation
with the style director.
You really think she'd be happy
with shampoo boy?
No, Jonny.
If I ask you to do something,
you do it. You understand?
Yes, Jonny. Sorry.
Thinks he can run
before he can walk, that one.
It's all part
of the mentoring process.
And there's no way
that I was gonna let him
anywhere near
your gorgeous locks.
I'm not doing this anymore.
But you've got three shampoos
and a Himalayan body scrub
stacking up.
I can't go back in there.
Jonny's a monster.
You just really wind him up.
He's a pussycat really.
You know what he said to me
this morning?
No.
Back in the day,
I'd be Evesham's village idiot.
Truth hurts, though, Gaz.
Call center's hiring
if you're interested.
I'm not going anywhere.
MAGGIE: I don't know how much
longer I can bear it, Jonny.
Pete cares more about his trains
than he does about me.
JONNY: You deserve
so much more, Maggie.
He never even looks at me,
let alone -- you know.
It's like I don't exist.
I don't know what I'd do
without you.
Oh, it's my pleasure.
You are a wonderful,
special woman, Maggie.
Mm, mm, mm.
Ready?
Yes.
You look 10 years younger.
Well, I don't really,
but thanks.
Why do you keep
putting yourself down?
You are absolutely stunning.
No, Angelina Jolie's stunning.
I'm just kind of
okayish
in a sort of
"older woman" kind of way.
Has someone hurt you
recently, Agatha?
Keeping secrets
is all part of the job.
You can tell me yours
over dinner if you like.
-Uh...
That's my lift.
I better go.
Ooh.
Blueberry Diva.
Deliciously moreish.
I don't.
But thanks for asking.
-Mm-hmm.
He seems very popular
with the ladies.
The whole of Evesham's
trying to get in his pants.
But he's only interested
in old slappers.
The richer the better.
Not his biggest fan, then?
No.
He is.
I'm guessing that's his car.
Yeah, he doesn't deserve it.
The way he treats people.
Roy Silver.
If you ever want to talk
or may--
Are you one of the single ladies
or are you not?
What about you and Mr. Hair?
If I hadn't have arrived
when I did...
AGATHA:
Listen, we made a pact.
I'm not about to break it.
ROY: Neither am I.
You never said Lord Toffee Nose
was in Cyprus.
AGATHA: Didn't I?
Not as bad as this one.
I caught him outside the salon
flirting with the shampoo boy.
Right, he's not just a shampoo
boy. He also does blow-dries.
And so what if we've been
tempted? We haven't succumbed.
Not yet.
I'll pick up my golf bag later.
Make sure it's ready this time.
Yes, Rob.
See you soon.
Bill!
Heard you were back.
Your hair looks, um, unusual?
Thank you.
Come here.
Give us a hug.
I've missed you.
Just wanted to say how
sorry I am about you and James.
I shouldn't have encouraged you
to follow him.
Well, I shouldn't have pushed
you and Gemma together.
Not really very good
at this love thing, you and I,
are we?
Wilkes.
He's on my case 24-7.
It's driving me insane.
This is the same Wilkes
whose work ethic involved
eating burgers
and jumping out of bushes?
He's been on
an advanced policing course.
Ohh.
Sounds like you need
a good old moan
over a good old bottle
of merlot.
What about tonight?
Yeah, I'd love to.
Actually, I forgot --
I'm out tonight.
But, um, I'll call you.
Okay.
So hairy
you could stuff a mattress.
I'm gonna do you
a organic decaf chai latte,
and I'll smash you an avocado
if you're peckish.
Poach me an egg.
Obviously it looked great
when you did it,
but clearly I do not have
the time or the skills
for this
tousled "natural" look.
Natural can be sexy.
Especially on you.
Right, let's get you shampooed
and make you beautiful again.
And Jonny will be with you
in a few minutes.
Mm-hmm.
You're not trying
to impress him.
No, no, no.
Jonny.
You just want to look
your best for you, don't you?
Oof.
Who are you trying to kid?
MAN:
Don't -- Don't cry.
Don't cry!
Get your hands...
Don't push me!
Don't push me,
or I'll get nasty!
WOMAN:
I can't go on like this. Please.
MAN:
You don't have a choice.
Do as I say, or I'll make sure
you suffer.
Listen.
Aah!
Oh!
Help!
Can...
C
Need a hand, Agatha?
Uh...
Yes, please.
My neighbors are always
kicking off.
Do you know, I think they get
a buzz out of it.
Ooh.
You are so tense.
You're, uh, not married, then?
Mm. I was.
But we were just kids.
Split up not long after.
All very amicable.
How about you?
Well, uh, let's just
say that I've not been
quite as lucky in love
as I have been in business.
So we're both
free agents now?
So that's one kung pao beef,
one chicken chow mein.
-Crispy seaweed.
-Crispy seaweed.
-ROY: Capital ribs.
-Capital ribs.
Sarah's getting us a Chinese!
I'm having pork balls,
obviously.
What do you fancy, Aggie?
Actually, I'm just heading out.
Meeting my aunt.
Heh.
Yes, she is a bit of a stickler
for punctuality, so, uh
I better get going.
Heh!
How's this?
A bottle each?
Plus a cocktail.
I've got a bottle of
Napoleon brandy back at mine
if you fancy a little
What
Ready?
I'm ready.
Sorry. Sorry, sorry.
I don't think my legs
are quite...
Liza.
Liza!
Hey, it's Agatha.
Oh. Bit weird.
-No.
No, I never seen her before
in my life.
-Let's go.
JONNY: Agatha. Agatha.
Agatha, wake up.
Wake up. Agatha.
Oh! Yes.
Can I get you
to come back to mine?
I can't.
I can't because I can't.
There's a -- A man is coming
to trim my thatch
first thing in the morning,
so I've -- I've got to -- yeah.
You forgot something.
-Oh!
You look so beautiful
in this light.
-Yeah. Huh.
I-I -- I think --
I think there's a...
I think there might be a storm
coming tonight.
I mean, coming back here --
late, drunk.
Treating this place
like a hotel.
It is actually my house.
GEMMA:
You lied to us, Aggie.
-The trust is broken.
-We want the truth now.
-Otherwise you're grounded.
-For a month.
All right!
It wasn't my aunt.
Oh, bloody hypocrite.
Okay, so I fancied him.
But I don't now.
Oh, yeah.
Looked like it an' all.
Listen, I was just trying
to humor him.
-So that he didn't suspect.
That I thought there was
something a bit weird going on.
Liza Friendly was at the pub.
She saw him, and she couldn't
get away fast enough.
He claimed that he didn't know
who she was,
which I didn't believe.
And then I get home,
and I find this at the door.
"Jonny Shawpart is dangerous.
Get out before it's too late".
And you think this came
from Liza?
Yeah, well, who else
is it gonna be from?
Gaz said something about
Jonny targeting old slappers.
Sorry. Mature women.
Especially those who are loaded.
Sorry.
If Liza's so scared, why doesn't
she contact the police?
Because Jonny
is a keeper of secrets.
What if she had something
that he was holding against her?
-Blackmail.
-Blackmail.
Liza might not be
his only victim.
I feel another investigation
coming on.
I'm gonna talk to Liza.
I think she's obviously
hiding something.
Gemma, you can go
to the salon undercover.
Oh, no, I can't
'cause Kyra's at Guide camp.
-Oh, Kyra!
-SARAH: I'll go.
If the women of this parish
are in danger,
-it's my duty to protect them.
-Perfect!
So if Jonny Shawpart
is up to something,
-the single ladies...
-And Sarah.
...and Sarah are not gonna
let him get away with it.
Oh, hi.
Is Liza in?
What's it about?
The ladies society concert.
LIZA: Agatha!
I'd offer you tea,
but we're about to go out.
Oh, it won't take long.
I, um, just...
...wanted to check
that you were okay.
Why wouldn't I be?
Last night.
Oh, that.
I was rushing to the ladies.
I should never eat prawns.
They go right through me.
So, uh, you didn't
leave that note?
Uh, thanks for popping by,
Agatha!
Uh, I'll see you at rehearsal.
JOSIE: Is it itchy, though,
or is it smelly?
Oh, it's both?
Right, okay.
Yeah.
No, there's cream for that.
Don't worry.
Yeah, no, I've had that.
Absolutely.
Okay.
Oh, I'd like an appointment
with Jonny Shawpart, please.
Oh, you and every other
sex-starved woman
living in the Cotswolds.
Call you back, Mum.
He's fully booked for
the next six weeks, I'm afraid.
I-I'll wait for a cancellation.
-He's not in till later.
-I'll come back then.
Okay.
Just so you know,
I'm not sex-starved.
I'm a happily married
vicar's wife
with a very adventurous
love life.
Praise the Lord.
-Hi, Bill.
-They had a break-in last night.
Bloody kids. They're like
cockroaches, aren't they?
Get in anywhere.
I'll see you then.
I don't know
what came over me.
Don't worry. You're only
bigging up what the Bible says.
Go forth and multiply.
Jez would be proud.
Well, at least I didn't
mention role-play.
That was on the tip
of my tongue.
That's Jonny's car.
What's he doing here?
She's old enough
to be his mother.
SARAH: Jez was with a older
woman when we first met.
Taught him everything he knows.
I'm rather grateful, really.
-Jez is quite the man.
-Mm.
Yes, he is.
Listen!
Now he's showing
his true colors.
Gotcha.
-That's not good.
-Unh-unh.
-We should probably help.
-Yeah.
Let's go.
ROY: Look at that.
That's bad.
Her name's Maggie.
She's in an unhappy marriage.
Jonny was all over her
at the salon.
So, what do we do now?
What do we do?
We flush him out.
Are the single ladies
still accepting members?
Oh, really?
Not you as well.
Jez is threatening
to cancel our holiday.
It was supposed to be
our second bloody honeymoon.
I know! You have been
planning it for ages.
Well, the bishop was appalled by
all the buckets in the church,
so Jez says he can't
in all conscience go anywhere
until we raise money
for the repairs.
Leave it with me.
I owe you after today.
-See you at the meeting.
Sarah deserves her holiday.
And how amazing would it be if
we could all help get her there?
But the concert, as it stands,
does not really raise the amount
of funds that we need.
So, with my old P.R. hat on,
may I suggest
a bit of a rebrand.
A burlesque extravaganza!
I've always fancied meself
in a basque.
I couldn't.
Rob wouldn't let me.
What's it got to do with Rob?
This is not about him.
This is for us.
It is not for anyone else.
Dress it up all you like.
It's just glorified stripping.
AGATHA: Ah, you see,
that's where you're wrong.
It's much more than that.
This is about feeling confident
in your own skin,
about feeling powerful,
beautiful.
It doesn't matter
how old you are,
whether you're fat or thin.
I'm not sure.
Sarah! Think about the W.I.
ladies with their calendars.
That wasn't degrading.
I bet they all had their doubts.
It was inspiring!
It was liberating!
I have contacts who can help
with merchandising.
Think about it.
Mugs, tea towels, T-shirts.
With the right marketing,
we could get the money
to save this church roof.
This could be massive.
Yeah, I'm up for it.
And so am I.
As long as it's tastefully done.
Well!
You'll be getting my resignation
in the morning, Mrs. Bloxby.
Nice one, Aggie.
Don't forget your broomstick
on the way out.
Well, let's have
a show of hands.
All those in favor?
Uh, I'm sorry, Sarah.
I-I wish I could, but I-I can't.
Sarah.
Yeah.
Jonny's agreed to meet me
at the White Hart for lunch.
Game on.
Testing, testing.
One, two, three.
Hear you loud and clear.
Over.
Target is on his way.
Over.
Target has arrived.
Looking like
an absolute whopper.
Over.
-Doot!
-Oh!
Oh! Hi!
Oh, my God.
What happened?
Joy rider ran into me.
Face hit the windscreen.
Car's a complete write-off.
But I'm fine now.
-Eh, it's just a few bruises.
Well, I just wanted to say
I am sorry
for getting so drunk.
Ah, no need.
It's just a shame
we didn't have that nightcap.
Well, it gives us an opportunity
to get to know each other
a little.
Like, for example,
what are you doing here?
I mean, you don't strike me
as a country bumpkin type.
I was working too hard.
Sold the Bristol salon
for a small fortune.
Escaped to Evesham
for the country dream.
Oh, well,
you're looking good on it.
Partly down to these.
Vitamins from L.A.
Vale View Pharmacy managed
to track them down for me.
Trouble is...
...I'm so chilled now,
I'm restless.
I need a new challenge.
Yes.
I know the feeling.
I'm thinking about starting
a salon in London.
Mayfair. Bond Street.
Oh, do you know,
I would love to go back.
I have made such a mess
of things here.
We could go together.
Well, I know how to run
a successful salon.
You know how to run
a high-end P.R. campaign.
Mm, well, I have been looking
for an investment.
And I've been looking
for a woman to invest in.
There is something
you should know
before this goes any further.
I am in a relationship.
But it's complicated.
Things haven't been going well,
and then James went away,
and, uh, I -- well, I, um,
slept with his best friend,
Charles.
Just the once.
Oh, dear.
It's okay, Agatha.
We all make mistakes.
But what you don't understand
is that Charles is a psychopath.
He's pathologically jealous.
He refuses to let me go,
and James is gonna come back
any day now, and...
-I'm here now.
-Ohh!
But I don't want you
to get all involved.
I'm already involved.
Tell me all about it.
We can deal with it together.
But first let's get a bottle.
Agatha!
Did you get my flowers?
Charles!
You're a violent psycho,
jealous,
and can't bear to see me
with another man!
I really like you, Agatha,
but that's going to far.
It's role-play, Charles.
Just go with it.
I'll explain later.
Oh! Uh, Jonny.
This is Charles.
Oh, just you calm down!
I don't want another one
of your jealous episodes!
So you're stalking her now?
Yes, uh,
Jonny is my hairdresser,
who did such a beautiful job
on my hair
that I just wanted to take him
out to lunch to thank him.
Oh, and you expect me
to believe that, do you?
You lying little tart!
-Oh! Aah!
-You're coming with me!
Oh! No, please!
Hands off me!
Get your hands off her.
Listen, if I were you,
I'd damn well stay out of this.
Or what?
Or I'll give you
a big fat fist sandwich.
Smash your nose
to smithereens.
Before or after
I cut off your balls off
and stuff them
down your throat?
Time to go, Charlie boy.
Not so brave now, are you?
You okay?
I'm gonna just make sure
he leaves. I'll be right back.
JONNY: Hello? Hello.
Hello, hello?
I can't hear you.
You're breaking up.
You're breaking up.
Listen, listen.
Listen to me.
Stop your pathetic sniveling
and listen.
I don't care how hard it is.
Get me that money,
or it's all over.
He needs money.
Why?
Business is booming.
Plus he drives
a 100-grand car.
Or he did,
until he wrote it off.
Maybe he just gets off
on the power,
uses it to ensnare women
and control their every move.
Or it's greed,
pure and simple.
He says he wants to go
into business with me.
Needs an investor.
Wants to rip you off,
more like.
I'm gonna go back to the salon.
Gonna keep stringing him along
until we get the proof
that we need.
I could go undercover.
Gaz offered me
a free Thai massage.
-Hey.
-Oh!
Oh.
Hey!
Roy.
Let's get you on that table,
shall we?
I've got some fabulous oils
with your name on them,
actually, so...
Want to...
Can't wait.
Okay, come on through.
Mind how you go there.
I like your trainers.
My nan's got a pair.
The mud pack is straight
from the Dead Sea.
But you're not dead yet.
So that's good, isn't it?
I'm just gonna make this
a bit tighter.
See, it's supposed to help
with wrinkles,
but I think you might've
left it too late.
Mm.
That's a busy little fingernail
you've got going on there.
Toxic Jade.
Gorgeous, aren't they?
We've got a promotion on neons
at the moment,
but neons don't complement
the aging hand.
So if I was you,
I'd go for, like, a nude.
With a pearlescent shimmer
or something, like the queen.
Thanks, Josie.
Oh, can I get you anything?
Like a water?
Green tea?
Smashed avocado?
-No, thank you.
-Okay.
Do you think all this
is really necessary?
Your complexion will be
more radiant.
Trust me.
Josie thinks
I'm beyond restoration.
Her lack of tact
masks a heart of gold.
She clearly adores you.
-It's just a crush.
Like she could ever
compete with you, Agatha.
I'm really not that special,
Jonny.
Ooh.
Been thinking about you
all day.
-Can't concentrate.
Oh, sorry.
I'll be right back.
Ohhhhhhhhh,
that is sweeeeeeet!
Jonny hasn't got any nicer,
then?
No. Still treating me
like his little bitch.
-Ow!
Soon as I qualify,
I'm out of here.
MAN:
What was that?
Sounds suspiciously like
a happy ending.
Eww.
Josie will do anything
for a big tip.
That bloke's not the only thing
she's creaming off.
Yuck.
Cash has been disappearing
from the office.
Jonny keeps accusing me,
but I know it's her.
That didn't sound very happy.
Aah!
Yeah, Salon JS,
Evesham high street.
Yeah. Thanks.
Police and ambulance
are on their way.
What are you doing?
I found a letter
from Liza Friendly
in Jonny's man bag,
begging him to stop
blackmailing her.
To his house.
His address
was on the envelope.
To do what exactly?
I think that all of
Jonny's women had secrets,
and that was why he chose them.
If I don't destroy the evidence,
their lives are gonna be ruined.
But what if it was murder?
One of Jonny's women
could be his killer.
Listen, you just go
and stall the police
for as long as you can.
ROY: Aggie.
You've got a green face.
Mm!
Everybody stay where they are.
This is now officially
a crime scene.
You think it's murder?
I cannot reveal anything
until the escalated
working practices
have been escalated
and the decision-making systems
for the newly categorized
complex investigation
have been implemented.
He's been on a course.
Golf, or...?
Nobody is permitted to leave
until all threat,
risk, and vulnerability factors
have been assessed,
including any potential link to
organized crime and terrorism.
Terrorism?
Oh, my God.
BILL:
No need to panic.
What D.C.I. Wilkes means is
we'll have to take a statement
before we can let you leave.
Well, we're not all here.
Someone's done a runner.
-Mrs. Agatha Raisin.
Joy rider, my ass.
Which supermarket
is this suit from?
So Agatha vanished
into thin air
without a word
to her best mate?
I had a deceased hairdresser
to deal with.
It's all a bit of a blur.
Under Subsection 2
of the 1911 Perjury Act,
I could arrest you
on suspicion of telling porkies.
Go on, then.
But I swear to God
I have absolutely no idea
where she is.
Liza Friendly?
Liza very friendly.
Maggie Henderson?!
Oh!
How is she even doing that?
Deirdra Darry?
Seriously?!
Oh, God.
Ohh!
Come on, Roy.
Think.
What would Madonna do?
Ahh.
Destroy the evidence!
In we go.
In we go.
I'm coming!
Mrs. Agatha Raisin.
-AGATHA: Roy.
He's developed a severe problem
with foot odor,
and he's finding it
very difficult to shift.
As you are no doubt aware,
Jonny Shawpart was found dead
at his salon earlier today,
a death we're treating
as suspicious
under Section 4,
Subsection 2b of, uh....
Wait.
I've lost the page.
And you, Mrs. Raisin...
We have a witness who claims
you absconded from the scene
minutes after
the said victim's demise.
"Give the suspect the earliest
opportunity to explain
why the offense took place."
No, I didn't mean
to read that bit out loud.
Where did you go?
Well, I came home.
I was in shock.
and I -- I didn't know
what to do with myself.
So you were nowhere near
Mr. Shawpart's residence
at any point today?
No.
So you know nothing about
the fire at his home?
-No.
Oh. We've got a forensic lead
at the property.
I need to speak to the F.O.
Why are you wearing
a dressing gown?
Bill, I simply felt the need
for lounge wear.
I was feeling a little stressed.
Do you have a problem with that?
I'm perfectly fine now.
I can just...
Experience tells me
you're more involved in this
than you're letting on.
All right, okay.
So is this the bit
where you tell me
not to get involved
in detecting, is it?
No, actually.
I need your help.
Wilkes regurgitating the
rule book is getting us nowhere.
You share what you know.
I'll do the same.
Then maybe we can
solve this case together.
Oh, Bill! I don't --
I don't know anything.
This isn't a game, Agatha.
They reckon
Jonny was poisoned.
And not just any old poison.
His symptoms indicate ricin,
which was injected into vitamins
found at the scene.
-Oh, my God.
-Yeah!
And according to
witness statements,
you were with him
the day before he died,
in the salon when he died,
and then you do a runner.
If you're not the murderer,
why take such a close interest
in Jonny Shawpart?
He was blackmailing
some of his clients.
Why not come to us first?
Because I was trying to stop him
before anybody else got hurt.
Some of his victims
had far too much lose.
Jonny's murder means his victims
are now suspects.
It was arson.
Started by an accelerant
chemical substance
as yet unknown.
Well, any witnesses?
I'm not authorized to reveal
classified information
to my prime suspect.
You're not supposed to tell her
she's your prime suspect, sir.
Mm?
Mrs. Raisin was familiar
with the victim.
Maybe she can shed some light
on the footage we received.
This individual was seen
entering the property
from a neighbor's
security camera.
Blacked-out face.
Black-hooded mac.
Nothing whatsoever
to identify them.
Apart from the distinctive
shiny trainers
with red laces, sir.
WILKES: Apart from that,
obviously.
So do you recognize this person,
Mrs. Raisin?
No.
This isn't over, Mrs. Raisin.
Not by a long chalk!
Everything all right, Agatha?
Yes. Yes. Uh...
I'm -- I'm the new
neighborhood watch warden.
You?
Yes.
Uh, they were just bringing me
some information packs.
So there was nothing to identify
our friendly neighborhood
fire starter?
Mnh-mnh.
Nothing.
Roy, what if they think
it's me?
The forensics are there
at Jonny's house right now,
mooching around.
-Yes!
The killer injected his vitamins
with ricin.
Ricin?
Ricin.
ROY: "Ricin is one of the most
poisonous substances on earth.
It is derived from the seeds
of the castor oil plant."
Castor oil plant.
I mean...?
We need to find out
who has one,
and if so, whether there's
any connections with Jonny.
Mm!
I told Deirdra Darry that I was
made neighbor watch warden.
So that gives us carte blanche
to go rooting around
in people's herbaceous borders.
Right. Come on.
Let's get cracking.
Oh, no, we can't.
We've got the costume fitting
with Gemma,
and I'm stage manager now.
But I can do
some subtle asking around.
"Nice weather we're having.
Do you have a castor oil plant?"
Probably not like that.
But Sarah
knows everything about everyone,
so let's just ask her.
Right, come on.
We have a plan.
Okay.
Now, try them on in the toilets
and then come and see Eve,
who has kindly joined us
as hair and beauty consultant.
-We're going full-on glamour.
-Ooh!
Oh, and ladies,
there've been reports
that Peeping George
is in the vicinity.
So no undressing
near any of the windows.
That's a shame.
You -- You have to call Agatha,
James.
Well, she keeps asking
if I know where you are,
and you know
how much I hate lying.
These are lush, Mrs. B.
Where'd you get them from?
Found a catalog
in Bernard Boggle's
bedside cabinet.
-He's a dark horse.
-Pshh, you're not wrong.
He's hung like an Arab stallion.
-Oh, you don't want to know.
I do, please.
-Oh, yeah.
Yeah, I love it.
Very dominatrix.
You'll terrify the blokes
in that.
If they can't handle it, tough.
We are not pandering
to any of them anymore.
Yeah.
And we've got you
to thank
for that, Mrs. Raisin.
Thanks, Mrs. Raisin.
I've got some nipple tassels
that'll look magnificent
on you, Mrs. Benson.
Now, where are they, Roy dear?
Come on, then, Boggler.
She's had a bit of a personality
transplant, hasn't she?
Since she kicked
her old man out.
She never used to thank anyone
for anything.
Single-lady life
clearly suits her.
Can you give me a hand, Gemma,
if it's not too much trouble?
Yeah, sure.
-I feel like such a fraud.
Everyone thanking me
for their newfound emancipation.
First sniff of male attention,
and I nearly sniffed him.
You didn't succumb.
Only because I realized
he was a blackmailer
and I was gonna be
his next victim.
Otherwise I would have been
right in there.
So you've stopped
missing James, then?
No.
This is because I miss him.
Well, he'll be back.
I'm sure of it.
But do you think he's gonna be
coming back to me?
Ohhh.
Listen to me!
I'm more of a sap
than Liza Friendly,
mooning over a man who quite
frankly does not deserve me.
I haven't heard from Liza
in a while.
I've been calling her, but...
Oh, I know that face.
Is she in trouble?
She could be.
Jonny was blackmailing her.
I think her husband
must have found out.
And someone took a pop at Jonny
a couple of days before he died.
Rob Friendly may be
an unreconstructed Neanderthal,
but he's not a murderer.
Yeah, well,
I just need to find out,
make sure she's okay.
Do you want me
to come with you?
Oh, no, it's okay.
Oh, but you could help me.
Do you know of anyone in Carsely
that's got a castor oil plant?
Not off the top of my head.
But I could snoop around.
I just wanted to check
you were okay.
Sarah Bloxby said
she'd been trying to reach you.
Rob doesn't want me involved.
Says it's degrading.
Sorry!
I need to talk to you
about Jonny.
Did Rob know about this?
So he wasn't the one
who attacked Jonny?
If Rob knew I was cheating,
it wouldn't be Jonny he'd hurt.
Mum gave me some money
when she sold her house.
£12,000.
Rob knew nothing about it.
Mum didn't trust him.
-But you told Jonny.
-I thought he loved me.
He was so kind, caring.
Told me I was beautiful.
And then he went cold on you.
I couldn't understand it.
So I started following him.
I saw him
with that old frump Maggie.
What did she have
that I didn't?
More money, probably.
I bombarded him with texts
telling him
how much I loved him.
And he threatened
to show them to Rob?
I gave him
half my mum's money in cash,
and he deleted the texts
in front of me,
but he'd kept copies
then demanded more money.
When I heard he was dead, I
thought I'd escaped from hell.
Did you see him
with anyone else?
That Josie
was always hanging around.
I was so jealous.
ROB: Liza?!
Liza?!
-You'll have to go out the back.
-Forgot my bloody golf balls!
None of this
can ever come out, Agatha.
Promise me.
I'd rather die.
I won't let anything happen.
I swear.
Oof!
Come on, come on.
Agatha, are you all right?
Oh!
Yes, I'm fine.
Where are you?
I think you're right.
So that means that Jonny was
blackmailing Deirdra Darry,
and she was poisoning him
to prevent anyone finding out
about the affair.
Well, it fits the pattern.
So that means
that Jonny actually -- oh!
Did the deed with Deirdra.
It just seems a bit of
a stretch, don't you think?
Oh, Jonny would do anything
for money.
Even Deirdra Darry.
And guess which pharmacy
supplied his vitamins.
Deirdra Darry again!
-Oh, you're good at this lark.
-I know.
We still need to make sure
that this plant
is what we think it is.
Mrs. Boggle.
She's quite the botanist.
-I'll get her a cutting.
-DEIRDRA: Reggie!
-She's back, she's back!
Come to Mummy!
I've got treatipoos!
What on earth is going...
...on?
Neighborhood watch.
We, uh, thought we saw
an intruder.
-False alarm.
But I am gonna have to check out
your internal security.
-If that's okay.
-No! It's not okay.
Now, get off my property
before I call the police.
-You go to Mrs. Boggle.
-I'm not leaving you!
Listen, I'm fine.
I can handle it. Go!
He's only following
his instincts.
Just like you were
with Jonny Shawpart?
I know you were the one
that supplied the vitamins
that killed him.
Not here.
Come inside.
My late husband, Keith,
he did a big plumbing job
for Jonny
when he first moved
to the area.
He was a master plumber.
Course he was.
Keith always wanted me to have
the best of everything.
Couldn't always afford it,
though.
What's this got to do
with Jonny?
Keith installed
a whole heating system.
Kitchen, three bathrooms.
And all for cash.
He didn't declare it.
-I had no idea.
-But Jonny did.
He told me that
if I didn't give him £10,000,
that he would tell the HMRC,
they'd be forced to investigate,
and it could ruin me.
So you thought
you had to do something.
I am not a murderer,
Mrs. Raisin.
The police, however,
may conclude differently.
I need to do some investigating
of my own.
Well, if you find anything you
may find helpful, then maybe --
You may think you're
the new Miss Marple.
I have an IQ of 158.
And a shrewd and inquiring mind.
I'll solve this puzzle
far more efficiently on my own.
Now, if you don't mind.
Well, if you change your mind,
call me.
-You're scented, I'm afraid.
All the village dogs
will be after you now.
Just like all the village men
seem to be.
-Reggie. Come on.
-I'll explain later!
Aah! Oh!
Get away!
Ah!
I think you owe me
an explanation.
Ah, yes.
Uh, right.
Uh...
Where to start?
Um...
It's complicated.
I risked life,
limb, and testicles
for your little role-play.
It won't happen again, Charles.
But I loved playing detective
with you in Cyprus.
And -- And that wasn't all
I loved.
Charles.
But, listen, look, your --
We're good together!
-Agatha!
-Go!
Goodbye!
Do you believe
Deirdra Darry's denial?
I'm not sure.
She definitely has motive.
And she's a pharmacist.
She would know how
to extract ricin.
If we could prove
that the seeds
came from
her castor oil plant...
We can't.
Oh, sorry. Hello.
Uh, according to Mrs. Boggle,
it's the Fatsia japonica,
otherwise known
as the fake castor oil plant.
Same leaves,
no poisonous seeds.
Seriously?
So you mean all that
creeping about in bushes
and getting pissed on
was for nothing?
Let's rewind to the beginning.
First time you went
to the salon,
you said you heard
a couple fighting.
I did.
Did we ever find out
who they were?
We didn't.
Jonny said it was
warring neighbors,
but I think that voice
could've been his.
We need to see
if they actually exist.
I can do that.
Oh, I forgot to say --
I think we've found Maggie.
Oh.
Hello?
MAGGIE:
The gentle moonlight
kissing the soft orbs
of your ivory breasts,
just like I want to now.
Oh,
Fernando.
I wish I could tell you to stop,
but I can't.
I really...
I'd never experienced
true romance before.
Jonny made me feel so wanted.
Unlike your husband.
It was as if one of my favorite
characters had come to life.
Then he started
to refuse my calls.
I couldn't get
an appointment.
So I sent letters
expressing my passion.
Graphic at times.
And finally he agreed
to meet me in the park.
Jonny knew I'd been saving
for a new life.
Nearly £10,000.
He threatened to tell my husband
about us
and my plans to leave
if I didn't hand over the money
in 24 hours.
I thought he was bluffing.
The Jonny I knew would never
betray me like that.
But this wasn't one of
your romantic novels.
MAGGIE: When I failed to meet
the deadline,
he dropped the letters
at Pete's work.
-The same day that Jonny got...
-Smashed on the nose.
Punched.
Pete can snap
if he's pushed too far.
But is he capable of murder?
Not with poison.
If he'd wanted to kill Jonny,
he'd have done it
with his bare hands.
Well, thank you for that,
Sarah.
So Jonny was lying
about the neighbors.
That building has not been
occupied for months.
So Mr. Raging was Jonny.
Who was he talking to?
How many other women were there?
Liza and Maggie
both had motive.
Yes, but no actual evidence
to connect them to the murder.
And I think they were both
still in love with him.
Which Deirdra Darry never was.
But she supplied the vitamins
and had the technical know-how
to pull it off.
She was just desperate
to protect her nest egg.
-And her reputation.
-She'll still be at work.
We could take
a little look around.
That doesn't sound
entirely legal.
Since when has that
bothered you?
Good afternoon, Russell.
I'm not taking any chances
this time with that dog.
I don't think
that Reggie's in.
There's no barking.
Oh, my God.
Roy.
No sign of a break-in, sir.
There are two cups on the table.
Oh, that sounds like
she must have known her killer.
Did you see anyone,
Mrs. Raisin?
No.
And why should I believe you?
Your car was caught on CCTV
less than a mile
from Mr. Shawpart's house
on the day of the fire,
and you said
you'd been nowhere near it.
Yes.
I had run out of milk.
The village shop sells milk.
Yes, it does.
But it doesn't sell goat's milk.
I have an allergy.
They need your permission
to move the body, sir.
I haven't finished with you.
You're gonna tell me
everything you know.
-Of course not.
I know what you're thinking.
Maggie and Liza
have gone through quite enough
without Wilkes
poking his big clumsy oar in.
So, what are you thinking?
I'm thinking of
how very little we know
about Jonny's life
before he came here.
You think his "escape to
the country" story is a cover?
Go to Bristol.
See if you can find out.
Hairdressing world's
quite small.
Maybe Gaz knows something.
Why don't you make
another appointment?
-Well, the salon's closed.
-Oh. Sorry.
Eve's taken it over.
And kept all the staff.
Even Josie.
Now, Josie's one of
Jonny's fan club
that seems to have
gone under our radar.
I mean, what do we actually know
about her?
Gaz said she was stealing cash
from the business.
What if Jonny found out?
If Josie's attracted to no-good
serial philanderers,
maybe we should ask
Charles Fraith?
Yeah, I'd rather not pander
to his giant ego.
You didn't mind pandering
to his giant ego in Cyprus.
I'll go to Bristol.
No comment.
Oh. And there was I thinking
that you'd changed your mind.
A little rumpy-pumpy
for old times' sake.
Oh, Charles, I am trying to
erase that chapter
from my memory.
No, I need you
to go undercover.
I'll go under your covers
anytime.
Not mine!
-Somebody else's.
-Go on.
I need you to take a pretty,
pert-breasted 20-something
to dinner.
At my expense.
To do what?
I need you to use
your suave, debonair charm
to suss out her relationship
with Jonny Shawpart.
Oh, and, uh, Charles,
this isn't an actual date.
So no actual shagging.
Of course not.
I'm a professional.
Mm.
GAZ: Hair by JN was
the coolest salon in Bristol.
Three-month waiting list.
Features in national magazines.
So when he came to Evesham...
I bet you couldn't
believe your luck.
-Mm-hmm.
-There you go, Agatha.
Thank you.
What do they say?
Never meet your heroes.
You're happy now here,
though, are you?
With Eve?
Oh, yeah.
She's been totally amazeballs.
I don't know what I'd have done
without her.
But I am thinking
of going into dog grooming.
More money, less hassle.
Dogs are so much nicer
than people.
Yeah.
Not all of them.
Oh! Aaah!
JOSIE: I don't normally drink
this much.
You're a terrible influence.
Well, I've been
told that before.
Cheers.
My mum told me to stay away
from men like you.
But I reckon you're more like
a George Clooney-type
than a dirty old perv, so...
You know, when I saw you
through the window
of that salon, I thought,
"I cannot walk past
without meeting
this vision of loveliness."
I do have that effect
on people.
Must be traumatic, though,
working somewhere a man
you were so close to died.
He wasn't as nice
as everyone thought.
But he had this aura about him
that just
sucked you in.
It sucked my mum in,
that's for sure.
-Yeah.
Sorry, I shouldn't
have said anything.
Oh.
The night is still young.
Sorry.
White wine
gives me terrible gas.
You're not even
supposed to have that on.
I thought Roy might have
found something in Bristol.
You need to forget about
the investigation
and focus on getting better.
Oh, the hospital told me
it was just concussion.
Oh, damn it,
Jez and I have got a meeting
with the parish council
about the roof.
Well, I'll be fine.
You can go.
If you promise me
to take it easy while I'm away.
I promise.
-Charles Fraith.
-Oh, perfect.
He can babysit me
while you're gone.
But what did he actually do?
CHARLES: Jonny blackmailed
Josie's mum into believing
that her husband
was having an affair.
They had revenge sex.
He filmed it.
And he blackmailed her.
Josie got the job
as receptionist,
with the express intention
of ripping Jonny off
to the tune of £7,000.
The money that he'd taken
from her mother.
Exactly!
Josie knew that Jonny
wouldn't be interested in her
because she wasn't loaded.
But she was quite interested
in me last night.
Oh, Charles, you didn't!
She likened me
to George Clooney.
-It seemed rude not to.
Anyway, I got the information
you wanted.
I think I deserve a gold star.
Silver star. Taking into account
your unorthodox methods.
Well, I'd better be going,
or else Sarah
will have my guts for garters
for overtiring you
when she returns.
Call me if you need me.
-Okay.
Agatha.
I thought you'd want to
see these.
Your brake lines
were deliberately cut.
Some sort of bright-green paint.
I'm not sure what it is yet.
Toxic Jade.
It was Josie.
Witnesses heard you arguing
with Jonny
on the morning of his death.
WILKES:
You were stealing from him.
Stock. Cash.
He was gonna call the police.
But you couldn't
let that happen.
It wasn't like that.
We've been going through
the CCTV
from the security cameras
in the salon.
Didn't know you had
a twin sister.
I only took what he owed us.
Jonny Shawpart
destroyed my family.
So you murdered him.
Just as you tried to murder
Mrs. Agatha Raisin
by cutting her brake lines.
No!
Look, I swear to God.
Okay, I took some cash.
I had nothing to do
with any stock going missing.
Or Mrs. Raisin's brakes.
There you are!
You're supposed to be in bed.
I had to get out for a bit.
Yeah, Sarah said you'd been
a terrible patient.
Oh, she'd give Nurse Ratched
a run for her money.
So how was Bristol?
The plot thickens.
Hair by JN opened in 2012.
The opening was a big deal.
It was featured
in all the national magazines.
The mayor was there,
local celebs.
The redhead is Natalie,
Jonny's first wife.
She looks a bit long
in the tooth, even for Jonny.
Not her. The one with the
tattoo, cutting the ribbon.
Three years later,
it burned to the ground.
Jonny and Natalie split up
soon after the fire.
Guy in the corner shop reckons
it was an insurance job,
but it was never proved.
Well, we need to do
a bit more digging.
I'll try my P.R. contacts
in Bristol.
So if it was
in national magazines,
I'll go home,
find out which ones,
and I will call the editors.
-I'll come with you.
-No. You finish your manly pint.
-It's just a pint.
-Make those calls.
Somebody must know something.
Oh. Hello?
Hello?
James?
Charles!
What are you doing here?
I say,
do put that down, Agatha.
I've got us a nice bottle
of Côte de Beaune.
-You should know better, Agatha.
Underneath a flower pot
is the first place
any jobbing burglar
would look for a spare key.
I thought you were
an ax murderer!
-You'd run out of kindling.
-Mm!
Charles, why are you even here?
It's Josie.
She's stalking me.
She wants to
move into the manor.
And she's not exactly
brood mare material.
So I needed a place to hide out
while she gets the message.
Mm, well...
Still doesn't explain
why you're naked
and in my dressing gown.
-I fancied a bath.
Oh, don't look at me
like that, Agatha.
It's really your fault,
you know?
I didn't tell you to shag her,
did I?
Oh! Hey.
Uh, any news?
Uh, Josie took
the afternoon off
to prepare for her date.
With you, Sir Charles.
She was nowhere near your car
that afternoon.
So it was someone else
with green, neon,
diamond
-It's from a range at the salon.
Freely accessible to staff
and clients.
Oh, do you know, come on in.
Just don't bother knocking.
Roll on up.
Whatever.
Sir Charles.
I like to get in touch
with my feminine side
from time to time, Inspector.
You should try it.
Charles, will you just
go upstairs and get dressed?
The forensics report
back from the fire.
All my training has paid off.
The chemical used to start
the fire was peroxide-related.
Peroxide used specifically
in hairdressing salons.
BILL:
How do you know?
I did an FBI module
in advanced barcode recognition.
But you can barely
send a text.
All right. That was then,
Detective Constable Wong.
The barcode was recovered
from a charred can.
I put it through
a digital tracing program
and discovered it was purchased
by Jonny Shawpart.
As were the scissors
that killed Deirdra Dandry.
Darry.
Deirdra -- Deirdra Darry.
Darry, Darry.
So our thief
was most likely our killer.
Oh. I...
You know what?
I think you might be
onto something.
Well done, sir!
I reckon I could still be
an FBI agent.
-SARAH: Hi.
Agatha!
What about your head?
This'll help.
Tried all my contacts
in Bristol.
Yes, please.
No one knows any more
than we do.
Uh, Sherlock Wilkes does.
-Oh, yes.
He has been on a course.
He's found out
that the cause of the fire
was peroxide
stolen from Salon JS.
So the thief
is now our prime suspect.
Roy, what is it?
Gaz had a load of peroxide
in his boot.
Was that before the fire?
Yeah, but there's no way
it's Gaz.
He's such a softy.
He wouldn't hurt anyone.
Jonny hated him.
He had access to his vitamins,
to my car
to cut the brake lines,
to the peroxide.
He had means, motive,
and an opportunity.
Well, when you put it
like that.
So maybe our Gaz
isn't quite as innocent
as he'd like us to believe.
Agatha!
You should've called.
I'm doing some work
on the rebranding.
Builders start tomorrow.
Just wanted my hair to look
its best for the show.
I mean, you sound very busy,
so if Gaz is around...
Come in.
I'll see what I can do.
Right, this should
sort your ends out.
Ongoing, I recommend a hot wrap
with coconut oil.
Okay. Uh...
So where's Gaz?
Upstairs.
Curtains drawn.
Won't talk to anyone.
-He's beside himself.
You know the police
have been sniffing around?
No.
EVE: They think he could
be the murderer.
I know.
Seems ridiculous.
He's such a sweetheart.
But what if he just lost it?
I mean, Jonny could be so cruel.
Oh, Jonny was hard on him.
That's an understatement.
The things he told me.
Really?
But, I mean, murder?
Do you think that Gaz
is capable of murder?
The police want me
to make a statement.
Gaz begged me to lie to them,
to corroborate
what he told them.
Why would he do that
if he wasn't guilty?
What are you gonna do?
Much as I love him,
I'm not prepared
to perjure myself.
Right, we'll leave this on
for 20 minutes.
-Oh, there's my builder.
He wants to go through
a couple of things.
Help yourself to magazines.
Gaz?
Call Aggie. Check she's okay.
I'll go after him.
Gaz!
Gaz! Gaz!
Slow down!
I'm mid-to-late 30s!
Sarah.
I found the plant.
ROY: Gaz!
Gaz!
Gaz!
Wondered where you'd got to.
I was looking for a toilet.
Gaz made a quick exit, then.
Poor boy.
I've just remembered --
I have a concert rehearsal.
-I better leave.
-Just let me wash that out.
-It won't take a sec.
-Yes! Yes, let's do that.
Gaz!
Wait!
Gaz, Gaz.
It's time to stop now.
Just tip your head back,
Agatha.
That's it.
Shouldn't take long.
Let me know
if this is too hot.
Oh. Here.
I feel as if I've seen
that tattoo somewhere before.
In a photograph.
Of Jonny's ex-wife.
You're Natalie.
Look, I nicked stuff.
Okay, I admit it.
So who did you sell it to?
It wasn't like that.
Eve was struggling
to stay afloat,
so she asked me
to take stock from Jonny
just to tide her over.
He could afford it.
What, exactly?
Shampoo. Scissors.
Some peroxide.
So the peroxide
I saw in your boot,
that ended up at Eve's.
-I was just helping her out.
-The one in your room.
That was in Eve's old office.
And when she moved,
she insisted I have it.
to brighten up my room.
EVE:
There, Agatha.
Jonny had
very expensive tastes.
Racked up loads of debt.
The fire seemed like
the only way out.
When the insurance company
became suspicious,
Jonny changed tack,
told the police
that I'd started the fire.
And they believed him.
So I reinvented myself.
How?
I had savings
Jonny knew nothing about.
Enough for a new identity
and to put a deposit
on the Evesham salon.
But then Jonny turned up.
Threatened to blow my cover.
Couldn't bear that I'd made it
without him.
I was happy for the first time
in my life.
I wasn't about
to let him ruin it.
I pretended I wanted
a reconciliation,
and he was vain enough
to believe me.
Spent a few nights
at his house --
enough time for me
to get a key cut
and to doctor his
precious vitamins with ricin.
How?
I trained
in organic beauty therapy.
I knew about distilling
compounds from plant extracts.
Injected them into his pills.
I understand how you
would want revenge,
but why did you want
to kill him?
He'd destroyed the person
I used to be.
I wasn't about to let him
destroy Eve too.
Police won't be here
for ten minutes.
-Let's try around the back.
-Okay.
EVE: Ohh!
Relax, Agatha!
Ohh.
I had to destroy any evidence
I'd been there.
Started the fire using peroxide
Gaz had nicked from Jonny.
Oh, the delicious irony.
And Mrs. Darry?
The stress was getting to me.
I couldn't sleep.
My G.P. prescribed temazepam.
Mrs. Darry had to check
my medical history.
My old notes were attached
to the new ones
under a different name --
Natalie Shawpart.
And she put
two and two together.
Then I heard you at the salon
asking questions about
Hair by JN.
So it was you
that cut my brake lines!
Only to scare you off.
But you just
couldn't leave it.
Ohh.
Ooh!
You want to go
looking your best.
I'm rubbish at climbing.
Well, I'm scared of heights.
But I'm very brave.
Shouldn't take long.
You'll go up like a torch.
AGATHA:
Eve, you're not
thinking straight!
This is just gonna
make things worse!
I told you not to smoke,
but you wouldn't listen.
And isn't that
just like you, Agatha?
Never taking no for an answer.
Goodbye, Agatha.
-ROY: Eve, no!
ROY: I literally have never
done this with a woman!
Sarah!
The match!
[ Mid-tempo doo-wop music
plays ]
Such a brilliant idea, Agatha.
Everyone is loving it.
Everyone who's here.
Are you really sure
you're up to it?
Tonight is about celebrating
the fabulous women that we are.
Loud, proud, and confident!
All the qualities
that Jonny Shawpart
did his best to undermine.
And I am going to enjoy
every minute of it.
WOMAN: Aaah!
I don't care if you have got
a ticket, Peeping George!
It doesn't included goosing!
Now get out!
Oi, get out!
Agatha.
Turns out Rob put the house
in my name for tax purposes.
Telling him to leave was
the best decision of my life.
I wouldn't have had
the courage without you, Agatha.
Well done, Agatha.
One step ahead of the plod
once again.
It's not that hard around here.
May I say
how remarkably alluring
you're looking this evening?
I am not sleeping
with you, Charles.
I said it in Cyprus,
and I'll say it again.
You're too good for him.
Everybody ready?
Ladies, it's show time.
-Yes.
I am.
[ Mid-tempo electronic music
plays ]
[ Cheers and applause
continues ]
The eagle has landed!
Oooh! Ooh!
The eagle has landed.
The eagle.
The eagle has landed!
James?
James.
Who are you?
DEIRDRA: Reggie!
Come to Mummy, darling.
There's a good boy.
Shh! Shh!
DEIRDRA: Ahh.
It's a behavioral response
to your overtly sexual aura.
You can't blame the poor dog.
I don't blame him.
I blame you!
You are trespassing!
Well, if you kept
your gate shut,
then he wouldn't have got in.
It's not my gate.
Then you're trespassing too.
Welcome home, Agatha.
[ Down-tempo classical music
playing ]
-Aggie!
-Oh!
ROY: She's home!
Right, all I know is that
you followed you to Cyprus
in case it all went pear-shaped
with James.
Oh, yeah, right.
So he didn't tell you the bit
about abandoning me
for Gorgeous Georgios?
He said he wanted to marry me.
I thought he was the one.
You abandoned me!
You chose a waiter
over your best friend!
-He was fit.
-Beautiful.
Did you -- Roy!
Did you bring him back here?
Oh, don't worry.
I steam-cleaned your mattress.
ROY:
When you bought the house back,
I knew you'd be away
for a while.
AGATHA:
Yeah, because I was in Cyprus!
I was lonely
and -- and feeling vulnerable.
And -- And, Roy,
I was in fear of my life!
What can I say?
It was love at first sight.
I wasn't thinking straight.
I was thinking very, very gay.
So where is he now?
Ohh.
Did a runner.
Yeah, with my wallet,
my fake Rolex, and the, um...
AGATHA:
Oh, come on, Roy.
Not my signed photograph
of Madonna?
Seriously?!
Is nothing sacred?
I'm sorry, Aggie.
I've let you down.
Yeah, well, good riddance.
'Cause all men are bastards.
Oh. Didn't go well
with Bill, then?
I-I don't want to talk about it.
I've got PTSD.
-Hey.
What happens in Cyprus
stays in Cyprus.
Just saying.
-You deserve better, Aggie.
-I know.
We all do.
Uhh!
I think we should just
sign off men for good.
-Single ladies club!
-AGATHA: I'm in!
-GEMMA: Ohh.
You can be honorary "member."
-"Member."
Yes, please.
AGATHA:
Well, as Madonna once said,
"Power is being told
that you're not loved
and then not being destroyed
by it."
Mmm, yeah, I'll drink to that.
To the Carsely
Single Ladies Society.
A life without men.
-A life without those bastards.
-A life without men!
ROY:
Come along, ladies.
My party.
SARAH: Sorry, James.
What fish?
I can't really hear you.
Yeah, no, it looks like
she's definitely back.
I don't want to be
your go-between.
Just call her, James.
Please.
James?
-Ja--
MRS. BOGGLE:
Come on, girls.
-I have done it before.
-It lives!
-Oh.
ROY: Good morning!
Do you know,
much as I love you guys,
I could really do with a little
bit of time on my own right now.
No, Ags. You're hurting.
You need our support.
It's single ladies together,
remember?
Do you not have a child?
Mm, Guide camp.
And you're here because...?
Oh, 'cause it's lush.
And your TV's bigger than mine.
I can't face London now, Aggie.
My heart is broken.
It's shattered into
tiny little pieces,
so I'm taking
a couple of days off work.
Do you know what?
Uh, I really -- I really need
to do quite a lot of thinking.
Mrs. Raisin.
Welcome home!
Mr. Lacey not with you?
-No. Oh! God.
!
Oh!
What the heck?
See?
You need us to protect you.
Settle down,
settle down, settle down.
Mrs. Raisin has
nothing further to say
and trusts
you will respect her privacy
at this very difficult time.
Thank you very much.
Thank you.
MRS. BOGGLE: What do you mean,
difficult time?
What?! Really!
No one gave a damn
about what I did in London.
Well, that's the charm
and the curse of village life.
But how am I gonna
get rid of them?
Roy and Gemma
are dealing with it.
For now.
You'll just
have to front it out.
How?
The village ladies society
are meeting today.
-You are joking.
-But they're like family.
I wasn't that keen
on my own family.
Come on.
We've got a concert to plan,
and you have such great ideas.
Right, well,
here's one for nothing.
Let's plan not to do it!
You really are in a bad way.
Have you -- have you heard
anything from James?
Oh, just the odd text
about the garden,
building maintenance,
stuff like that.
So nothing?
Nothing about
James is not the man
I thought he was.
All the more reason for you
to come today.
Show those gossips
that you're over him.
Mrs. Bloxby was telling me
about your new club.
Yes, but you have to
be single, Beryl.
Mr. Boggle and I
are on a break.
-He never liked Sergio.
-Her budgie.
Came home from Zumba,
he was nowhere to be seen.
Bernard said he'd flown away
but I found blue feathers
down the waste disposal.
He did not!
Evil old goat.
Banished him to his sister's
in Moreton.
Well, I always knew
he was a bit strange,
but I never saw him
as a budgie killer.
You can never
truly trust a man.
They're all barbarians at heart.
I couldn't agree more.
Boggle, you're in.
Well, if everyone's got tea,
I'd like to
open the meeting, please.
Well, I think that concludes
our business.
Soz. Soz.
Hi, Gemma.
Didn't think you were coming.
No, neither did I.
Roy made me.
All that does is leave me to say
many thanks to Mrs. Boggle
for agreeing to organize
our annual concert.
And to Mrs. Darry for agreeing
to do the teas.
Now we just need
some performers.
I can play the recorder,
as usual.
Gemma?
I could do my Lady Gaga
if you're desperate.
I, um -- I-I could read
some Pam Ayres.
Oh, that's lovely, Liza.
Thank you so much.
-Oh, you know, uh...
"Ohh, I wish I'd looked after
my teeth."
I know that.
I mean who's that?
Oh, uh, yeah, Liza Friendly.
She moved to Carsely
around Christmastime.
Bit beige,
but basically harmless.
DEIRDRA:
What about you, Mrs. Raisin?
Surely our local celebrity
must have some party piece
up her sleeve?
Oh, I'm afraid, Mrs. Darry,
I don't have any talent.
-Neither do they.
Doesn't stop them.
Okay, I think
we'll leave it there, ladies.
There are forms by the door for
anyone who'd like to sign up.
Thanks so much.
Um, just let me
introduce you to Agatha.
Agatha, I don't think you've met
Deirdra Darry.
She's taken over
Vale View Pharmacy in Evesham.
Yes.
Our paths have crossed.
Oh, sorry, I had no idea
you were Carsely's
famous, well-coiffed sleuth.
-Not with those roots.
-Huh.
Right, pardon my French now,
Mrs. Vicar,
but that woman is a total bitch.
Ohh. Look at this mess.
It's all the stress.
I have let myself go.
Come on, it just needs
a little attention.
Oh, actually,
somebody recommended
a marvelous new stylist
in Evesham.
I've got his card somewhere.
Yep, Jonny Shawpart.
There you go.
I've heard he's overrated,
overpriced.
-He thinks he's God's gift.
-That's every man I've ever met.
Yeah, well, I don't care
if he's a serial killer
if he can sort out this mess.
Here for the special?
Is this Studio JS?
No. That's further down
the high street.
This is Eve of Evesham.
But I can squeeze you in
for a cut and color?
No one does a purple rinse
like Eve.
Do you know, I'm not quite sure
I'm there yet.
There comes a time
when you have to
embrace your age, Mrs. Raisin,
not hide from it.
Oh, Sir Charles,
you shouldn't have!
Well, they're for Agatha,
actually.
Well, she's -- she's not in.
Well, perhaps you can
take them for her.
-Nice tan.
-Hard to avoid.
Cyprus is bloody hot.
No.
No, she didn't.
* Whoo *
Knock, knock.
Agatha Raisin.
I'm seeing Jonny at 3:00.
Oh, yeah, I can see why you
needed an emergency appointment.
Jonny?
Jonny,
your three o'clock's here.
Heh.
Your skin tone could take
a much richer color, Agatha.
-It's a cool name, by the way.
Thank you.
And I'm thinking something
more dramatic stylewise.
Yeah, to be honest,
I could do with a change.
There's a woman on the phone.
Says she's left
loads of messages.
I said no interruptions.
She says it's important. I could
start the color if you like.
My client is paying
for a consultation
with the style director.
You really think she'd be happy
with shampoo boy?
No, Jonny.
If I ask you to do something,
you do it. You understand?
Yes, Jonny. Sorry.
Thinks he can run
before he can walk, that one.
It's all part
of the mentoring process.
And there's no way
that I was gonna let him
anywhere near
your gorgeous locks.
I'm not doing this anymore.
But you've got three shampoos
and a Himalayan body scrub
stacking up.
I can't go back in there.
Jonny's a monster.
You just really wind him up.
He's a pussycat really.
You know what he said to me
this morning?
No.
Back in the day,
I'd be Evesham's village idiot.
Truth hurts, though, Gaz.
Call center's hiring
if you're interested.
I'm not going anywhere.
MAGGIE: I don't know how much
longer I can bear it, Jonny.
Pete cares more about his trains
than he does about me.
JONNY: You deserve
so much more, Maggie.
He never even looks at me,
let alone -- you know.
It's like I don't exist.
I don't know what I'd do
without you.
Oh, it's my pleasure.
You are a wonderful,
special woman, Maggie.
Mm, mm, mm.
Ready?
Yes.
You look 10 years younger.
Well, I don't really,
but thanks.
Why do you keep
putting yourself down?
You are absolutely stunning.
No, Angelina Jolie's stunning.
I'm just kind of
okayish
in a sort of
"older woman" kind of way.
Has someone hurt you
recently, Agatha?
Keeping secrets
is all part of the job.
You can tell me yours
over dinner if you like.
-Uh...
That's my lift.
I better go.
Ooh.
Blueberry Diva.
Deliciously moreish.
I don't.
But thanks for asking.
-Mm-hmm.
He seems very popular
with the ladies.
The whole of Evesham's
trying to get in his pants.
But he's only interested
in old slappers.
The richer the better.
Not his biggest fan, then?
No.
He is.
I'm guessing that's his car.
Yeah, he doesn't deserve it.
The way he treats people.
Roy Silver.
If you ever want to talk
or may--
Are you one of the single ladies
or are you not?
What about you and Mr. Hair?
If I hadn't have arrived
when I did...
AGATHA:
Listen, we made a pact.
I'm not about to break it.
ROY: Neither am I.
You never said Lord Toffee Nose
was in Cyprus.
AGATHA: Didn't I?
Not as bad as this one.
I caught him outside the salon
flirting with the shampoo boy.
Right, he's not just a shampoo
boy. He also does blow-dries.
And so what if we've been
tempted? We haven't succumbed.
Not yet.
I'll pick up my golf bag later.
Make sure it's ready this time.
Yes, Rob.
See you soon.
Bill!
Heard you were back.
Your hair looks, um, unusual?
Thank you.
Come here.
Give us a hug.
I've missed you.
Just wanted to say how
sorry I am about you and James.
I shouldn't have encouraged you
to follow him.
Well, I shouldn't have pushed
you and Gemma together.
Not really very good
at this love thing, you and I,
are we?
Wilkes.
He's on my case 24-7.
It's driving me insane.
This is the same Wilkes
whose work ethic involved
eating burgers
and jumping out of bushes?
He's been on
an advanced policing course.
Ohh.
Sounds like you need
a good old moan
over a good old bottle
of merlot.
What about tonight?
Yeah, I'd love to.
Actually, I forgot --
I'm out tonight.
But, um, I'll call you.
Okay.
So hairy
you could stuff a mattress.
I'm gonna do you
a organic decaf chai latte,
and I'll smash you an avocado
if you're peckish.
Poach me an egg.
Obviously it looked great
when you did it,
but clearly I do not have
the time or the skills
for this
tousled "natural" look.
Natural can be sexy.
Especially on you.
Right, let's get you shampooed
and make you beautiful again.
And Jonny will be with you
in a few minutes.
Mm-hmm.
You're not trying
to impress him.
No, no, no.
Jonny.
You just want to look
your best for you, don't you?
Oof.
Who are you trying to kid?
MAN:
Don't -- Don't cry.
Don't cry!
Get your hands...
Don't push me!
Don't push me,
or I'll get nasty!
WOMAN:
I can't go on like this. Please.
MAN:
You don't have a choice.
Do as I say, or I'll make sure
you suffer.
Listen.
Aah!
Oh!
Help!
Can...
C
Need a hand, Agatha?
Uh...
Yes, please.
My neighbors are always
kicking off.
Do you know, I think they get
a buzz out of it.
Ooh.
You are so tense.
You're, uh, not married, then?
Mm. I was.
But we were just kids.
Split up not long after.
All very amicable.
How about you?
Well, uh, let's just
say that I've not been
quite as lucky in love
as I have been in business.
So we're both
free agents now?
So that's one kung pao beef,
one chicken chow mein.
-Crispy seaweed.
-Crispy seaweed.
-ROY: Capital ribs.
-Capital ribs.
Sarah's getting us a Chinese!
I'm having pork balls,
obviously.
What do you fancy, Aggie?
Actually, I'm just heading out.
Meeting my aunt.
Heh.
Yes, she is a bit of a stickler
for punctuality, so, uh
I better get going.
Heh!
How's this?
A bottle each?
Plus a cocktail.
I've got a bottle of
Napoleon brandy back at mine
if you fancy a little
What
Ready?
I'm ready.
Sorry. Sorry, sorry.
I don't think my legs
are quite...
Liza.
Liza!
Hey, it's Agatha.
Oh. Bit weird.
-No.
No, I never seen her before
in my life.
-Let's go.
JONNY: Agatha. Agatha.
Agatha, wake up.
Wake up. Agatha.
Oh! Yes.
Can I get you
to come back to mine?
I can't.
I can't because I can't.
There's a -- A man is coming
to trim my thatch
first thing in the morning,
so I've -- I've got to -- yeah.
You forgot something.
-Oh!
You look so beautiful
in this light.
-Yeah. Huh.
I-I -- I think --
I think there's a...
I think there might be a storm
coming tonight.
I mean, coming back here --
late, drunk.
Treating this place
like a hotel.
It is actually my house.
GEMMA:
You lied to us, Aggie.
-The trust is broken.
-We want the truth now.
-Otherwise you're grounded.
-For a month.
All right!
It wasn't my aunt.
Oh, bloody hypocrite.
Okay, so I fancied him.
But I don't now.
Oh, yeah.
Looked like it an' all.
Listen, I was just trying
to humor him.
-So that he didn't suspect.
That I thought there was
something a bit weird going on.
Liza Friendly was at the pub.
She saw him, and she couldn't
get away fast enough.
He claimed that he didn't know
who she was,
which I didn't believe.
And then I get home,
and I find this at the door.
"Jonny Shawpart is dangerous.
Get out before it's too late".
And you think this came
from Liza?
Yeah, well, who else
is it gonna be from?
Gaz said something about
Jonny targeting old slappers.
Sorry. Mature women.
Especially those who are loaded.
Sorry.
If Liza's so scared, why doesn't
she contact the police?
Because Jonny
is a keeper of secrets.
What if she had something
that he was holding against her?
-Blackmail.
-Blackmail.
Liza might not be
his only victim.
I feel another investigation
coming on.
I'm gonna talk to Liza.
I think she's obviously
hiding something.
Gemma, you can go
to the salon undercover.
Oh, no, I can't
'cause Kyra's at Guide camp.
-Oh, Kyra!
-SARAH: I'll go.
If the women of this parish
are in danger,
-it's my duty to protect them.
-Perfect!
So if Jonny Shawpart
is up to something,
-the single ladies...
-And Sarah.
...and Sarah are not gonna
let him get away with it.
Oh, hi.
Is Liza in?
What's it about?
The ladies society concert.
LIZA: Agatha!
I'd offer you tea,
but we're about to go out.
Oh, it won't take long.
I, um, just...
...wanted to check
that you were okay.
Why wouldn't I be?
Last night.
Oh, that.
I was rushing to the ladies.
I should never eat prawns.
They go right through me.
So, uh, you didn't
leave that note?
Uh, thanks for popping by,
Agatha!
Uh, I'll see you at rehearsal.
JOSIE: Is it itchy, though,
or is it smelly?
Oh, it's both?
Right, okay.
Yeah.
No, there's cream for that.
Don't worry.
Yeah, no, I've had that.
Absolutely.
Okay.
Oh, I'd like an appointment
with Jonny Shawpart, please.
Oh, you and every other
sex-starved woman
living in the Cotswolds.
Call you back, Mum.
He's fully booked for
the next six weeks, I'm afraid.
I-I'll wait for a cancellation.
-He's not in till later.
-I'll come back then.
Okay.
Just so you know,
I'm not sex-starved.
I'm a happily married
vicar's wife
with a very adventurous
love life.
Praise the Lord.
-Hi, Bill.
-They had a break-in last night.
Bloody kids. They're like
cockroaches, aren't they?
Get in anywhere.
I'll see you then.
I don't know
what came over me.
Don't worry. You're only
bigging up what the Bible says.
Go forth and multiply.
Jez would be proud.
Well, at least I didn't
mention role-play.
That was on the tip
of my tongue.
That's Jonny's car.
What's he doing here?
She's old enough
to be his mother.
SARAH: Jez was with a older
woman when we first met.
Taught him everything he knows.
I'm rather grateful, really.
-Jez is quite the man.
-Mm.
Yes, he is.
Listen!
Now he's showing
his true colors.
Gotcha.
-That's not good.
-Unh-unh.
-We should probably help.
-Yeah.
Let's go.
ROY: Look at that.
That's bad.
Her name's Maggie.
She's in an unhappy marriage.
Jonny was all over her
at the salon.
So, what do we do now?
What do we do?
We flush him out.
Are the single ladies
still accepting members?
Oh, really?
Not you as well.
Jez is threatening
to cancel our holiday.
It was supposed to be
our second bloody honeymoon.
I know! You have been
planning it for ages.
Well, the bishop was appalled by
all the buckets in the church,
so Jez says he can't
in all conscience go anywhere
until we raise money
for the repairs.
Leave it with me.
I owe you after today.
-See you at the meeting.
Sarah deserves her holiday.
And how amazing would it be if
we could all help get her there?
But the concert, as it stands,
does not really raise the amount
of funds that we need.
So, with my old P.R. hat on,
may I suggest
a bit of a rebrand.
A burlesque extravaganza!
I've always fancied meself
in a basque.
I couldn't.
Rob wouldn't let me.
What's it got to do with Rob?
This is not about him.
This is for us.
It is not for anyone else.
Dress it up all you like.
It's just glorified stripping.
AGATHA: Ah, you see,
that's where you're wrong.
It's much more than that.
This is about feeling confident
in your own skin,
about feeling powerful,
beautiful.
It doesn't matter
how old you are,
whether you're fat or thin.
I'm not sure.
Sarah! Think about the W.I.
ladies with their calendars.
That wasn't degrading.
I bet they all had their doubts.
It was inspiring!
It was liberating!
I have contacts who can help
with merchandising.
Think about it.
Mugs, tea towels, T-shirts.
With the right marketing,
we could get the money
to save this church roof.
This could be massive.
Yeah, I'm up for it.
And so am I.
As long as it's tastefully done.
Well!
You'll be getting my resignation
in the morning, Mrs. Bloxby.
Nice one, Aggie.
Don't forget your broomstick
on the way out.
Well, let's have
a show of hands.
All those in favor?
Uh, I'm sorry, Sarah.
I-I wish I could, but I-I can't.
Sarah.
Yeah.
Jonny's agreed to meet me
at the White Hart for lunch.
Game on.
Testing, testing.
One, two, three.
Hear you loud and clear.
Over.
Target is on his way.
Over.
Target has arrived.
Looking like
an absolute whopper.
Over.
-Doot!
-Oh!
Oh! Hi!
Oh, my God.
What happened?
Joy rider ran into me.
Face hit the windscreen.
Car's a complete write-off.
But I'm fine now.
-Eh, it's just a few bruises.
Well, I just wanted to say
I am sorry
for getting so drunk.
Ah, no need.
It's just a shame
we didn't have that nightcap.
Well, it gives us an opportunity
to get to know each other
a little.
Like, for example,
what are you doing here?
I mean, you don't strike me
as a country bumpkin type.
I was working too hard.
Sold the Bristol salon
for a small fortune.
Escaped to Evesham
for the country dream.
Oh, well,
you're looking good on it.
Partly down to these.
Vitamins from L.A.
Vale View Pharmacy managed
to track them down for me.
Trouble is...
...I'm so chilled now,
I'm restless.
I need a new challenge.
Yes.
I know the feeling.
I'm thinking about starting
a salon in London.
Mayfair. Bond Street.
Oh, do you know,
I would love to go back.
I have made such a mess
of things here.
We could go together.
Well, I know how to run
a successful salon.
You know how to run
a high-end P.R. campaign.
Mm, well, I have been looking
for an investment.
And I've been looking
for a woman to invest in.
There is something
you should know
before this goes any further.
I am in a relationship.
But it's complicated.
Things haven't been going well,
and then James went away,
and, uh, I -- well, I, um,
slept with his best friend,
Charles.
Just the once.
Oh, dear.
It's okay, Agatha.
We all make mistakes.
But what you don't understand
is that Charles is a psychopath.
He's pathologically jealous.
He refuses to let me go,
and James is gonna come back
any day now, and...
-I'm here now.
-Ohh!
But I don't want you
to get all involved.
I'm already involved.
Tell me all about it.
We can deal with it together.
But first let's get a bottle.
Agatha!
Did you get my flowers?
Charles!
You're a violent psycho,
jealous,
and can't bear to see me
with another man!
I really like you, Agatha,
but that's going to far.
It's role-play, Charles.
Just go with it.
I'll explain later.
Oh! Uh, Jonny.
This is Charles.
Oh, just you calm down!
I don't want another one
of your jealous episodes!
So you're stalking her now?
Yes, uh,
Jonny is my hairdresser,
who did such a beautiful job
on my hair
that I just wanted to take him
out to lunch to thank him.
Oh, and you expect me
to believe that, do you?
You lying little tart!
-Oh! Aah!
-You're coming with me!
Oh! No, please!
Hands off me!
Get your hands off her.
Listen, if I were you,
I'd damn well stay out of this.
Or what?
Or I'll give you
a big fat fist sandwich.
Smash your nose
to smithereens.
Before or after
I cut off your balls off
and stuff them
down your throat?
Time to go, Charlie boy.
Not so brave now, are you?
You okay?
I'm gonna just make sure
he leaves. I'll be right back.
JONNY: Hello? Hello.
Hello, hello?
I can't hear you.
You're breaking up.
You're breaking up.
Listen, listen.
Listen to me.
Stop your pathetic sniveling
and listen.
I don't care how hard it is.
Get me that money,
or it's all over.
He needs money.
Why?
Business is booming.
Plus he drives
a 100-grand car.
Or he did,
until he wrote it off.
Maybe he just gets off
on the power,
uses it to ensnare women
and control their every move.
Or it's greed,
pure and simple.
He says he wants to go
into business with me.
Needs an investor.
Wants to rip you off,
more like.
I'm gonna go back to the salon.
Gonna keep stringing him along
until we get the proof
that we need.
I could go undercover.
Gaz offered me
a free Thai massage.
-Hey.
-Oh!
Oh.
Hey!
Roy.
Let's get you on that table,
shall we?
I've got some fabulous oils
with your name on them,
actually, so...
Want to...
Can't wait.
Okay, come on through.
Mind how you go there.
I like your trainers.
My nan's got a pair.
The mud pack is straight
from the Dead Sea.
But you're not dead yet.
So that's good, isn't it?
I'm just gonna make this
a bit tighter.
See, it's supposed to help
with wrinkles,
but I think you might've
left it too late.
Mm.
That's a busy little fingernail
you've got going on there.
Toxic Jade.
Gorgeous, aren't they?
We've got a promotion on neons
at the moment,
but neons don't complement
the aging hand.
So if I was you,
I'd go for, like, a nude.
With a pearlescent shimmer
or something, like the queen.
Thanks, Josie.
Oh, can I get you anything?
Like a water?
Green tea?
Smashed avocado?
-No, thank you.
-Okay.
Do you think all this
is really necessary?
Your complexion will be
more radiant.
Trust me.
Josie thinks
I'm beyond restoration.
Her lack of tact
masks a heart of gold.
She clearly adores you.
-It's just a crush.
Like she could ever
compete with you, Agatha.
I'm really not that special,
Jonny.
Ooh.
Been thinking about you
all day.
-Can't concentrate.
Oh, sorry.
I'll be right back.
Ohhhhhhhhh,
that is sweeeeeeet!
Jonny hasn't got any nicer,
then?
No. Still treating me
like his little bitch.
-Ow!
Soon as I qualify,
I'm out of here.
MAN:
What was that?
Sounds suspiciously like
a happy ending.
Eww.
Josie will do anything
for a big tip.
That bloke's not the only thing
she's creaming off.
Yuck.
Cash has been disappearing
from the office.
Jonny keeps accusing me,
but I know it's her.
That didn't sound very happy.
Aah!
Yeah, Salon JS,
Evesham high street.
Yeah. Thanks.
Police and ambulance
are on their way.
What are you doing?
I found a letter
from Liza Friendly
in Jonny's man bag,
begging him to stop
blackmailing her.
To his house.
His address
was on the envelope.
To do what exactly?
I think that all of
Jonny's women had secrets,
and that was why he chose them.
If I don't destroy the evidence,
their lives are gonna be ruined.
But what if it was murder?
One of Jonny's women
could be his killer.
Listen, you just go
and stall the police
for as long as you can.
ROY: Aggie.
You've got a green face.
Mm!
Everybody stay where they are.
This is now officially
a crime scene.
You think it's murder?
I cannot reveal anything
until the escalated
working practices
have been escalated
and the decision-making systems
for the newly categorized
complex investigation
have been implemented.
He's been on a course.
Golf, or...?
Nobody is permitted to leave
until all threat,
risk, and vulnerability factors
have been assessed,
including any potential link to
organized crime and terrorism.
Terrorism?
Oh, my God.
BILL:
No need to panic.
What D.C.I. Wilkes means is
we'll have to take a statement
before we can let you leave.
Well, we're not all here.
Someone's done a runner.
-Mrs. Agatha Raisin.
Joy rider, my ass.
Which supermarket
is this suit from?
So Agatha vanished
into thin air
without a word
to her best mate?
I had a deceased hairdresser
to deal with.
It's all a bit of a blur.
Under Subsection 2
of the 1911 Perjury Act,
I could arrest you
on suspicion of telling porkies.
Go on, then.
But I swear to God
I have absolutely no idea
where she is.
Liza Friendly?
Liza very friendly.
Maggie Henderson?!
Oh!
How is she even doing that?
Deirdra Darry?
Seriously?!
Oh, God.
Ohh!
Come on, Roy.
Think.
What would Madonna do?
Ahh.
Destroy the evidence!
In we go.
In we go.
I'm coming!
Mrs. Agatha Raisin.
-AGATHA: Roy.
He's developed a severe problem
with foot odor,
and he's finding it
very difficult to shift.
As you are no doubt aware,
Jonny Shawpart was found dead
at his salon earlier today,
a death we're treating
as suspicious
under Section 4,
Subsection 2b of, uh....
Wait.
I've lost the page.
And you, Mrs. Raisin...
We have a witness who claims
you absconded from the scene
minutes after
the said victim's demise.
"Give the suspect the earliest
opportunity to explain
why the offense took place."
No, I didn't mean
to read that bit out loud.
Where did you go?
Well, I came home.
I was in shock.
and I -- I didn't know
what to do with myself.
So you were nowhere near
Mr. Shawpart's residence
at any point today?
No.
So you know nothing about
the fire at his home?
-No.
Oh. We've got a forensic lead
at the property.
I need to speak to the F.O.
Why are you wearing
a dressing gown?
Bill, I simply felt the need
for lounge wear.
I was feeling a little stressed.
Do you have a problem with that?
I'm perfectly fine now.
I can just...
Experience tells me
you're more involved in this
than you're letting on.
All right, okay.
So is this the bit
where you tell me
not to get involved
in detecting, is it?
No, actually.
I need your help.
Wilkes regurgitating the
rule book is getting us nowhere.
You share what you know.
I'll do the same.
Then maybe we can
solve this case together.
Oh, Bill! I don't --
I don't know anything.
This isn't a game, Agatha.
They reckon
Jonny was poisoned.
And not just any old poison.
His symptoms indicate ricin,
which was injected into vitamins
found at the scene.
-Oh, my God.
-Yeah!
And according to
witness statements,
you were with him
the day before he died,
in the salon when he died,
and then you do a runner.
If you're not the murderer,
why take such a close interest
in Jonny Shawpart?
He was blackmailing
some of his clients.
Why not come to us first?
Because I was trying to stop him
before anybody else got hurt.
Some of his victims
had far too much lose.
Jonny's murder means his victims
are now suspects.
It was arson.
Started by an accelerant
chemical substance
as yet unknown.
Well, any witnesses?
I'm not authorized to reveal
classified information
to my prime suspect.
You're not supposed to tell her
she's your prime suspect, sir.
Mm?
Mrs. Raisin was familiar
with the victim.
Maybe she can shed some light
on the footage we received.
This individual was seen
entering the property
from a neighbor's
security camera.
Blacked-out face.
Black-hooded mac.
Nothing whatsoever
to identify them.
Apart from the distinctive
shiny trainers
with red laces, sir.
WILKES: Apart from that,
obviously.
So do you recognize this person,
Mrs. Raisin?
No.
This isn't over, Mrs. Raisin.
Not by a long chalk!
Everything all right, Agatha?
Yes. Yes. Uh...
I'm -- I'm the new
neighborhood watch warden.
You?
Yes.
Uh, they were just bringing me
some information packs.
So there was nothing to identify
our friendly neighborhood
fire starter?
Mnh-mnh.
Nothing.
Roy, what if they think
it's me?
The forensics are there
at Jonny's house right now,
mooching around.
-Yes!
The killer injected his vitamins
with ricin.
Ricin?
Ricin.
ROY: "Ricin is one of the most
poisonous substances on earth.
It is derived from the seeds
of the castor oil plant."
Castor oil plant.
I mean...?
We need to find out
who has one,
and if so, whether there's
any connections with Jonny.
Mm!
I told Deirdra Darry that I was
made neighbor watch warden.
So that gives us carte blanche
to go rooting around
in people's herbaceous borders.
Right. Come on.
Let's get cracking.
Oh, no, we can't.
We've got the costume fitting
with Gemma,
and I'm stage manager now.
But I can do
some subtle asking around.
"Nice weather we're having.
Do you have a castor oil plant?"
Probably not like that.
But Sarah
knows everything about everyone,
so let's just ask her.
Right, come on.
We have a plan.
Okay.
Now, try them on in the toilets
and then come and see Eve,
who has kindly joined us
as hair and beauty consultant.
-We're going full-on glamour.
-Ooh!
Oh, and ladies,
there've been reports
that Peeping George
is in the vicinity.
So no undressing
near any of the windows.
That's a shame.
You -- You have to call Agatha,
James.
Well, she keeps asking
if I know where you are,
and you know
how much I hate lying.
These are lush, Mrs. B.
Where'd you get them from?
Found a catalog
in Bernard Boggle's
bedside cabinet.
-He's a dark horse.
-Pshh, you're not wrong.
He's hung like an Arab stallion.
-Oh, you don't want to know.
I do, please.
-Oh, yeah.
Yeah, I love it.
Very dominatrix.
You'll terrify the blokes
in that.
If they can't handle it, tough.
We are not pandering
to any of them anymore.
Yeah.
And we've got you
to thank
for that, Mrs. Raisin.
Thanks, Mrs. Raisin.
I've got some nipple tassels
that'll look magnificent
on you, Mrs. Benson.
Now, where are they, Roy dear?
Come on, then, Boggler.
She's had a bit of a personality
transplant, hasn't she?
Since she kicked
her old man out.
She never used to thank anyone
for anything.
Single-lady life
clearly suits her.
Can you give me a hand, Gemma,
if it's not too much trouble?
Yeah, sure.
-I feel like such a fraud.
Everyone thanking me
for their newfound emancipation.
First sniff of male attention,
and I nearly sniffed him.
You didn't succumb.
Only because I realized
he was a blackmailer
and I was gonna be
his next victim.
Otherwise I would have been
right in there.
So you've stopped
missing James, then?
No.
This is because I miss him.
Well, he'll be back.
I'm sure of it.
But do you think he's gonna be
coming back to me?
Ohhh.
Listen to me!
I'm more of a sap
than Liza Friendly,
mooning over a man who quite
frankly does not deserve me.
I haven't heard from Liza
in a while.
I've been calling her, but...
Oh, I know that face.
Is she in trouble?
She could be.
Jonny was blackmailing her.
I think her husband
must have found out.
And someone took a pop at Jonny
a couple of days before he died.
Rob Friendly may be
an unreconstructed Neanderthal,
but he's not a murderer.
Yeah, well,
I just need to find out,
make sure she's okay.
Do you want me
to come with you?
Oh, no, it's okay.
Oh, but you could help me.
Do you know of anyone in Carsely
that's got a castor oil plant?
Not off the top of my head.
But I could snoop around.
I just wanted to check
you were okay.
Sarah Bloxby said
she'd been trying to reach you.
Rob doesn't want me involved.
Says it's degrading.
Sorry!
I need to talk to you
about Jonny.
Did Rob know about this?
So he wasn't the one
who attacked Jonny?
If Rob knew I was cheating,
it wouldn't be Jonny he'd hurt.
Mum gave me some money
when she sold her house.
£12,000.
Rob knew nothing about it.
Mum didn't trust him.
-But you told Jonny.
-I thought he loved me.
He was so kind, caring.
Told me I was beautiful.
And then he went cold on you.
I couldn't understand it.
So I started following him.
I saw him
with that old frump Maggie.
What did she have
that I didn't?
More money, probably.
I bombarded him with texts
telling him
how much I loved him.
And he threatened
to show them to Rob?
I gave him
half my mum's money in cash,
and he deleted the texts
in front of me,
but he'd kept copies
then demanded more money.
When I heard he was dead, I
thought I'd escaped from hell.
Did you see him
with anyone else?
That Josie
was always hanging around.
I was so jealous.
ROB: Liza?!
Liza?!
-You'll have to go out the back.
-Forgot my bloody golf balls!
None of this
can ever come out, Agatha.
Promise me.
I'd rather die.
I won't let anything happen.
I swear.
Oof!
Come on, come on.
Agatha, are you all right?
Oh!
Yes, I'm fine.
Where are you?
I think you're right.
So that means that Jonny was
blackmailing Deirdra Darry,
and she was poisoning him
to prevent anyone finding out
about the affair.
Well, it fits the pattern.
So that means
that Jonny actually -- oh!
Did the deed with Deirdra.
It just seems a bit of
a stretch, don't you think?
Oh, Jonny would do anything
for money.
Even Deirdra Darry.
And guess which pharmacy
supplied his vitamins.
Deirdra Darry again!
-Oh, you're good at this lark.
-I know.
We still need to make sure
that this plant
is what we think it is.
Mrs. Boggle.
She's quite the botanist.
-I'll get her a cutting.
-DEIRDRA: Reggie!
-She's back, she's back!
Come to Mummy!
I've got treatipoos!
What on earth is going...
...on?
Neighborhood watch.
We, uh, thought we saw
an intruder.
-False alarm.
But I am gonna have to check out
your internal security.
-If that's okay.
-No! It's not okay.
Now, get off my property
before I call the police.
-You go to Mrs. Boggle.
-I'm not leaving you!
Listen, I'm fine.
I can handle it. Go!
He's only following
his instincts.
Just like you were
with Jonny Shawpart?
I know you were the one
that supplied the vitamins
that killed him.
Not here.
Come inside.
My late husband, Keith,
he did a big plumbing job
for Jonny
when he first moved
to the area.
He was a master plumber.
Course he was.
Keith always wanted me to have
the best of everything.
Couldn't always afford it,
though.
What's this got to do
with Jonny?
Keith installed
a whole heating system.
Kitchen, three bathrooms.
And all for cash.
He didn't declare it.
-I had no idea.
-But Jonny did.
He told me that
if I didn't give him £10,000,
that he would tell the HMRC,
they'd be forced to investigate,
and it could ruin me.
So you thought
you had to do something.
I am not a murderer,
Mrs. Raisin.
The police, however,
may conclude differently.
I need to do some investigating
of my own.
Well, if you find anything you
may find helpful, then maybe --
You may think you're
the new Miss Marple.
I have an IQ of 158.
And a shrewd and inquiring mind.
I'll solve this puzzle
far more efficiently on my own.
Now, if you don't mind.
Well, if you change your mind,
call me.
-You're scented, I'm afraid.
All the village dogs
will be after you now.
Just like all the village men
seem to be.
-Reggie. Come on.
-I'll explain later!
Aah! Oh!
Get away!
Ah!
I think you owe me
an explanation.
Ah, yes.
Uh, right.
Uh...
Where to start?
Um...
It's complicated.
I risked life,
limb, and testicles
for your little role-play.
It won't happen again, Charles.
But I loved playing detective
with you in Cyprus.
And -- And that wasn't all
I loved.
Charles.
But, listen, look, your --
We're good together!
-Agatha!
-Go!
Goodbye!
Do you believe
Deirdra Darry's denial?
I'm not sure.
She definitely has motive.
And she's a pharmacist.
She would know how
to extract ricin.
If we could prove
that the seeds
came from
her castor oil plant...
We can't.
Oh, sorry. Hello.
Uh, according to Mrs. Boggle,
it's the Fatsia japonica,
otherwise known
as the fake castor oil plant.
Same leaves,
no poisonous seeds.
Seriously?
So you mean all that
creeping about in bushes
and getting pissed on
was for nothing?
Let's rewind to the beginning.
First time you went
to the salon,
you said you heard
a couple fighting.
I did.
Did we ever find out
who they were?
We didn't.
Jonny said it was
warring neighbors,
but I think that voice
could've been his.
We need to see
if they actually exist.
I can do that.
Oh, I forgot to say --
I think we've found Maggie.
Oh.
Hello?
MAGGIE:
The gentle moonlight
kissing the soft orbs
of your ivory breasts,
just like I want to now.
Oh,
Fernando.
I wish I could tell you to stop,
but I can't.
I really...
I'd never experienced
true romance before.
Jonny made me feel so wanted.
Unlike your husband.
It was as if one of my favorite
characters had come to life.
Then he started
to refuse my calls.
I couldn't get
an appointment.
So I sent letters
expressing my passion.
Graphic at times.
And finally he agreed
to meet me in the park.
Jonny knew I'd been saving
for a new life.
Nearly £10,000.
He threatened to tell my husband
about us
and my plans to leave
if I didn't hand over the money
in 24 hours.
I thought he was bluffing.
The Jonny I knew would never
betray me like that.
But this wasn't one of
your romantic novels.
MAGGIE: When I failed to meet
the deadline,
he dropped the letters
at Pete's work.
-The same day that Jonny got...
-Smashed on the nose.
Punched.
Pete can snap
if he's pushed too far.
But is he capable of murder?
Not with poison.
If he'd wanted to kill Jonny,
he'd have done it
with his bare hands.
Well, thank you for that,
Sarah.
So Jonny was lying
about the neighbors.
That building has not been
occupied for months.
So Mr. Raging was Jonny.
Who was he talking to?
How many other women were there?
Liza and Maggie
both had motive.
Yes, but no actual evidence
to connect them to the murder.
And I think they were both
still in love with him.
Which Deirdra Darry never was.
But she supplied the vitamins
and had the technical know-how
to pull it off.
She was just desperate
to protect her nest egg.
-And her reputation.
-She'll still be at work.
We could take
a little look around.
That doesn't sound
entirely legal.
Since when has that
bothered you?
Good afternoon, Russell.
I'm not taking any chances
this time with that dog.
I don't think
that Reggie's in.
There's no barking.
Oh, my God.
Roy.
No sign of a break-in, sir.
There are two cups on the table.
Oh, that sounds like
she must have known her killer.
Did you see anyone,
Mrs. Raisin?
No.
And why should I believe you?
Your car was caught on CCTV
less than a mile
from Mr. Shawpart's house
on the day of the fire,
and you said
you'd been nowhere near it.
Yes.
I had run out of milk.
The village shop sells milk.
Yes, it does.
But it doesn't sell goat's milk.
I have an allergy.
They need your permission
to move the body, sir.
I haven't finished with you.
You're gonna tell me
everything you know.
-Of course not.
I know what you're thinking.
Maggie and Liza
have gone through quite enough
without Wilkes
poking his big clumsy oar in.
So, what are you thinking?
I'm thinking of
how very little we know
about Jonny's life
before he came here.
You think his "escape to
the country" story is a cover?
Go to Bristol.
See if you can find out.
Hairdressing world's
quite small.
Maybe Gaz knows something.
Why don't you make
another appointment?
-Well, the salon's closed.
-Oh. Sorry.
Eve's taken it over.
And kept all the staff.
Even Josie.
Now, Josie's one of
Jonny's fan club
that seems to have
gone under our radar.
I mean, what do we actually know
about her?
Gaz said she was stealing cash
from the business.
What if Jonny found out?
If Josie's attracted to no-good
serial philanderers,
maybe we should ask
Charles Fraith?
Yeah, I'd rather not pander
to his giant ego.
You didn't mind pandering
to his giant ego in Cyprus.
I'll go to Bristol.
No comment.
Oh. And there was I thinking
that you'd changed your mind.
A little rumpy-pumpy
for old times' sake.
Oh, Charles, I am trying to
erase that chapter
from my memory.
No, I need you
to go undercover.
I'll go under your covers
anytime.
Not mine!
-Somebody else's.
-Go on.
I need you to take a pretty,
pert-breasted 20-something
to dinner.
At my expense.
To do what?
I need you to use
your suave, debonair charm
to suss out her relationship
with Jonny Shawpart.
Oh, and, uh, Charles,
this isn't an actual date.
So no actual shagging.
Of course not.
I'm a professional.
Mm.
GAZ: Hair by JN was
the coolest salon in Bristol.
Three-month waiting list.
Features in national magazines.
So when he came to Evesham...
I bet you couldn't
believe your luck.
-Mm-hmm.
-There you go, Agatha.
Thank you.
What do they say?
Never meet your heroes.
You're happy now here,
though, are you?
With Eve?
Oh, yeah.
She's been totally amazeballs.
I don't know what I'd have done
without her.
But I am thinking
of going into dog grooming.
More money, less hassle.
Dogs are so much nicer
than people.
Yeah.
Not all of them.
Oh! Aaah!
JOSIE: I don't normally drink
this much.
You're a terrible influence.
Well, I've been
told that before.
Cheers.
My mum told me to stay away
from men like you.
But I reckon you're more like
a George Clooney-type
than a dirty old perv, so...
You know, when I saw you
through the window
of that salon, I thought,
"I cannot walk past
without meeting
this vision of loveliness."
I do have that effect
on people.
Must be traumatic, though,
working somewhere a man
you were so close to died.
He wasn't as nice
as everyone thought.
But he had this aura about him
that just
sucked you in.
It sucked my mum in,
that's for sure.
-Yeah.
Sorry, I shouldn't
have said anything.
Oh.
The night is still young.
Sorry.
White wine
gives me terrible gas.
You're not even
supposed to have that on.
I thought Roy might have
found something in Bristol.
You need to forget about
the investigation
and focus on getting better.
Oh, the hospital told me
it was just concussion.
Oh, damn it,
Jez and I have got a meeting
with the parish council
about the roof.
Well, I'll be fine.
You can go.
If you promise me
to take it easy while I'm away.
I promise.
-Charles Fraith.
-Oh, perfect.
He can babysit me
while you're gone.
But what did he actually do?
CHARLES: Jonny blackmailed
Josie's mum into believing
that her husband
was having an affair.
They had revenge sex.
He filmed it.
And he blackmailed her.
Josie got the job
as receptionist,
with the express intention
of ripping Jonny off
to the tune of £7,000.
The money that he'd taken
from her mother.
Exactly!
Josie knew that Jonny
wouldn't be interested in her
because she wasn't loaded.
But she was quite interested
in me last night.
Oh, Charles, you didn't!
She likened me
to George Clooney.
-It seemed rude not to.
Anyway, I got the information
you wanted.
I think I deserve a gold star.
Silver star. Taking into account
your unorthodox methods.
Well, I'd better be going,
or else Sarah
will have my guts for garters
for overtiring you
when she returns.
Call me if you need me.
-Okay.
Agatha.
I thought you'd want to
see these.
Your brake lines
were deliberately cut.
Some sort of bright-green paint.
I'm not sure what it is yet.
Toxic Jade.
It was Josie.
Witnesses heard you arguing
with Jonny
on the morning of his death.
WILKES:
You were stealing from him.
Stock. Cash.
He was gonna call the police.
But you couldn't
let that happen.
It wasn't like that.
We've been going through
the CCTV
from the security cameras
in the salon.
Didn't know you had
a twin sister.
I only took what he owed us.
Jonny Shawpart
destroyed my family.
So you murdered him.
Just as you tried to murder
Mrs. Agatha Raisin
by cutting her brake lines.
No!
Look, I swear to God.
Okay, I took some cash.
I had nothing to do
with any stock going missing.
Or Mrs. Raisin's brakes.
There you are!
You're supposed to be in bed.
I had to get out for a bit.
Yeah, Sarah said you'd been
a terrible patient.
Oh, she'd give Nurse Ratched
a run for her money.
So how was Bristol?
The plot thickens.
Hair by JN opened in 2012.
The opening was a big deal.
It was featured
in all the national magazines.
The mayor was there,
local celebs.
The redhead is Natalie,
Jonny's first wife.
She looks a bit long
in the tooth, even for Jonny.
Not her. The one with the
tattoo, cutting the ribbon.
Three years later,
it burned to the ground.
Jonny and Natalie split up
soon after the fire.
Guy in the corner shop reckons
it was an insurance job,
but it was never proved.
Well, we need to do
a bit more digging.
I'll try my P.R. contacts
in Bristol.
So if it was
in national magazines,
I'll go home,
find out which ones,
and I will call the editors.
-I'll come with you.
-No. You finish your manly pint.
-It's just a pint.
-Make those calls.
Somebody must know something.
Oh. Hello?
Hello?
James?
Charles!
What are you doing here?
I say,
do put that down, Agatha.
I've got us a nice bottle
of Côte de Beaune.
-You should know better, Agatha.
Underneath a flower pot
is the first place
any jobbing burglar
would look for a spare key.
I thought you were
an ax murderer!
-You'd run out of kindling.
-Mm!
Charles, why are you even here?
It's Josie.
She's stalking me.
She wants to
move into the manor.
And she's not exactly
brood mare material.
So I needed a place to hide out
while she gets the message.
Mm, well...
Still doesn't explain
why you're naked
and in my dressing gown.
-I fancied a bath.
Oh, don't look at me
like that, Agatha.
It's really your fault,
you know?
I didn't tell you to shag her,
did I?
Oh! Hey.
Uh, any news?
Uh, Josie took
the afternoon off
to prepare for her date.
With you, Sir Charles.
She was nowhere near your car
that afternoon.
So it was someone else
with green, neon,
diamond
-It's from a range at the salon.
Freely accessible to staff
and clients.
Oh, do you know, come on in.
Just don't bother knocking.
Roll on up.
Whatever.
Sir Charles.
I like to get in touch
with my feminine side
from time to time, Inspector.
You should try it.
Charles, will you just
go upstairs and get dressed?
The forensics report
back from the fire.
All my training has paid off.
The chemical used to start
the fire was peroxide-related.
Peroxide used specifically
in hairdressing salons.
BILL:
How do you know?
I did an FBI module
in advanced barcode recognition.
But you can barely
send a text.
All right. That was then,
Detective Constable Wong.
The barcode was recovered
from a charred can.
I put it through
a digital tracing program
and discovered it was purchased
by Jonny Shawpart.
As were the scissors
that killed Deirdra Dandry.
Darry.
Deirdra -- Deirdra Darry.
Darry, Darry.
So our thief
was most likely our killer.
Oh. I...
You know what?
I think you might be
onto something.
Well done, sir!
I reckon I could still be
an FBI agent.
-SARAH: Hi.
Agatha!
What about your head?
This'll help.
Tried all my contacts
in Bristol.
Yes, please.
No one knows any more
than we do.
Uh, Sherlock Wilkes does.
-Oh, yes.
He has been on a course.
He's found out
that the cause of the fire
was peroxide
stolen from Salon JS.
So the thief
is now our prime suspect.
Roy, what is it?
Gaz had a load of peroxide
in his boot.
Was that before the fire?
Yeah, but there's no way
it's Gaz.
He's such a softy.
He wouldn't hurt anyone.
Jonny hated him.
He had access to his vitamins,
to my car
to cut the brake lines,
to the peroxide.
He had means, motive,
and an opportunity.
Well, when you put it
like that.
So maybe our Gaz
isn't quite as innocent
as he'd like us to believe.
Agatha!
You should've called.
I'm doing some work
on the rebranding.
Builders start tomorrow.
Just wanted my hair to look
its best for the show.
I mean, you sound very busy,
so if Gaz is around...
Come in.
I'll see what I can do.
Right, this should
sort your ends out.
Ongoing, I recommend a hot wrap
with coconut oil.
Okay. Uh...
So where's Gaz?
Upstairs.
Curtains drawn.
Won't talk to anyone.
-He's beside himself.
You know the police
have been sniffing around?
No.
EVE: They think he could
be the murderer.
I know.
Seems ridiculous.
He's such a sweetheart.
But what if he just lost it?
I mean, Jonny could be so cruel.
Oh, Jonny was hard on him.
That's an understatement.
The things he told me.
Really?
But, I mean, murder?
Do you think that Gaz
is capable of murder?
The police want me
to make a statement.
Gaz begged me to lie to them,
to corroborate
what he told them.
Why would he do that
if he wasn't guilty?
What are you gonna do?
Much as I love him,
I'm not prepared
to perjure myself.
Right, we'll leave this on
for 20 minutes.
-Oh, there's my builder.
He wants to go through
a couple of things.
Help yourself to magazines.
Gaz?
Call Aggie. Check she's okay.
I'll go after him.
Gaz!
Gaz! Gaz!
Slow down!
I'm mid-to-late 30s!
Sarah.
I found the plant.
ROY: Gaz!
Gaz!
Gaz!
Wondered where you'd got to.
I was looking for a toilet.
Gaz made a quick exit, then.
Poor boy.
I've just remembered --
I have a concert rehearsal.
-I better leave.
-Just let me wash that out.
-It won't take a sec.
-Yes! Yes, let's do that.
Gaz!
Wait!
Gaz, Gaz.
It's time to stop now.
Just tip your head back,
Agatha.
That's it.
Shouldn't take long.
Let me know
if this is too hot.
Oh. Here.
I feel as if I've seen
that tattoo somewhere before.
In a photograph.
Of Jonny's ex-wife.
You're Natalie.
Look, I nicked stuff.
Okay, I admit it.
So who did you sell it to?
It wasn't like that.
Eve was struggling
to stay afloat,
so she asked me
to take stock from Jonny
just to tide her over.
He could afford it.
What, exactly?
Shampoo. Scissors.
Some peroxide.
So the peroxide
I saw in your boot,
that ended up at Eve's.
-I was just helping her out.
-The one in your room.
That was in Eve's old office.
And when she moved,
she insisted I have it.
to brighten up my room.
EVE:
There, Agatha.
Jonny had
very expensive tastes.
Racked up loads of debt.
The fire seemed like
the only way out.
When the insurance company
became suspicious,
Jonny changed tack,
told the police
that I'd started the fire.
And they believed him.
So I reinvented myself.
How?
I had savings
Jonny knew nothing about.
Enough for a new identity
and to put a deposit
on the Evesham salon.
But then Jonny turned up.
Threatened to blow my cover.
Couldn't bear that I'd made it
without him.
I was happy for the first time
in my life.
I wasn't about
to let him ruin it.
I pretended I wanted
a reconciliation,
and he was vain enough
to believe me.
Spent a few nights
at his house --
enough time for me
to get a key cut
and to doctor his
precious vitamins with ricin.
How?
I trained
in organic beauty therapy.
I knew about distilling
compounds from plant extracts.
Injected them into his pills.
I understand how you
would want revenge,
but why did you want
to kill him?
He'd destroyed the person
I used to be.
I wasn't about to let him
destroy Eve too.
Police won't be here
for ten minutes.
-Let's try around the back.
-Okay.
EVE: Ohh!
Relax, Agatha!
Ohh.
I had to destroy any evidence
I'd been there.
Started the fire using peroxide
Gaz had nicked from Jonny.
Oh, the delicious irony.
And Mrs. Darry?
The stress was getting to me.
I couldn't sleep.
My G.P. prescribed temazepam.
Mrs. Darry had to check
my medical history.
My old notes were attached
to the new ones
under a different name --
Natalie Shawpart.
And she put
two and two together.
Then I heard you at the salon
asking questions about
Hair by JN.
So it was you
that cut my brake lines!
Only to scare you off.
But you just
couldn't leave it.
Ohh.
Ooh!
You want to go
looking your best.
I'm rubbish at climbing.
Well, I'm scared of heights.
But I'm very brave.
Shouldn't take long.
You'll go up like a torch.
AGATHA:
Eve, you're not
thinking straight!
This is just gonna
make things worse!
I told you not to smoke,
but you wouldn't listen.
And isn't that
just like you, Agatha?
Never taking no for an answer.
Goodbye, Agatha.
-ROY: Eve, no!
ROY: I literally have never
done this with a woman!
Sarah!
The match!
[ Mid-tempo doo-wop music
plays ]
Such a brilliant idea, Agatha.
Everyone is loving it.
Everyone who's here.
Are you really sure
you're up to it?
Tonight is about celebrating
the fabulous women that we are.
Loud, proud, and confident!
All the qualities
that Jonny Shawpart
did his best to undermine.
And I am going to enjoy
every minute of it.
WOMAN: Aaah!
I don't care if you have got
a ticket, Peeping George!
It doesn't included goosing!
Now get out!
Oi, get out!
Agatha.
Turns out Rob put the house
in my name for tax purposes.
Telling him to leave was
the best decision of my life.
I wouldn't have had
the courage without you, Agatha.
Well done, Agatha.
One step ahead of the plod
once again.
It's not that hard around here.
May I say
how remarkably alluring
you're looking this evening?
I am not sleeping
with you, Charles.
I said it in Cyprus,
and I'll say it again.
You're too good for him.
Everybody ready?
Ladies, it's show time.
-Yes.
I am.
[ Mid-tempo electronic music
plays ]
[ Cheers and applause
continues ]