Adventure Time (2010–2018): Season 2, Episode 26 - Heat Signature - full transcript
Finn and Jake ask Marceline the Vampire Queen to turn them into vampires. However, she isn't interested in transforming her friends and tricks them into thinking she has.
Man, I still can't believe
marceline is 1,000 years
old and has never seen
"heat signature."
This movie is gonna
blow their minds!
Marceline!
We've brought "heat signature"!
Woot-woot!
Whoo! Hey, so I want you all to
meet Finn and Jake. They
aren't completely lame.
What up? Guys, this is Wendy...
Hey. Boo boo...
Hello. Hello.
And georgy. Hey.
We used to be in a gang together
back in the underworld.
Hmm! Yeah, that's pretty sweet.
Hope y'all like getting your
minds blown, 'cause it's
showtime!
Ugh! What is wrong
with this couch?!
Man, that made my teeth hurt!
Oh, yeah. Sorry. I didn't
really ever sit on
there. I just float usually.
- We kind of all do.
- Ohh, what?!
Man, no fair! Yeah,
well, too bad you're
not vampires. So, anyways, I...
Wait! Hold on just a second.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
- Marceline, we insist
you turn us into vampires.
Or ghosts, or whatever... we
just want to fly. All
right, all right. Fine.
Yes! Come on, marceline!
You're gonna turn
these goofballs?
Don't worry.
I've got something way
more fun in mind.
Okay, marceline.
We're ready now. Okay.
Hold that thought.
I'm gonna perform the biting
ritual. You guys,
close your eyes, and
don't open them until I say so.
If you do, your heads will
explode! Okay, Finn. You first.
- Bite!
Chomp!
Boop, boop.
Boop, boop. Okeydokey. All done.
- How do you guys feel?
- Pretty much...
- The same.
- My neck sort of hurts.
Don't you feel a
little hungry...
- For blood?
I... I felt it! Jake,
do you feel it?
Yeah, I could go for some blood.
Oh, no!
Jake, we're gonna have to drink
blood now for all eternity!
Yeah!
What if we turn evil?!
I'll have to start wearing
cologne! Relax, guys.
You can satisfy your
bloodlust without killing.
Look.
You just eat the color.
Here, Jake. You try.
- Ahh!
- Aah! Come on!
Sorry, bro.
Oh, snap! I feel... Stronger.
Whoa.
Marceline, can we float now?
Mm, not yet.
That's a really advanced power.
First, you got to go through
vampire orientation.
Think you chumps can handle it?
♪ Oh, baby! ♪
♪ Yeah, baby! ♪
♪ Baby, baby, baby, yeah! ♪
♪ Baby, yeah, yeah! ♪
Okay, guys. The first
phase of vampire
orientation is learning...
Invisibility!
Ah, hey!
You ready for the power of...
- Invisibility?
- With all my heart!
Good. Now, spin!
Give it a whirl, Jake!
Now chant, "invisible!
Invisible!" Invisible!
Invisible!
Oof!
Yep. It worked.
- We're invisible!
- Ugh!
- You're invisible!
- Hey, then how come we
can see each other?
Because you guys became
vampires at the same time,
so you're forever linked.
Aw, yeah!
Marceline...
You're friends with
some real morons.
Oh, my God, Melissa. Ever
since Clara stopped eating
meat, her skin looks so good!
I mean, she still looks fat,
but, like, I can't say
that junk to her face.
Wow! Lsp's a hobo!
Let's mess with her. I'm
doing so awesome on my
own. Like, right
now, I found this
- can of beans. Who-o-o-o-o-o-!
Finn? Jake! Put down my stuff!
She knows it's us!
She must recognize our voices!
Let's disguise them!
We're in-vee-see-beel! Melissa!
I have to go!
They got into my toilet paper!
Melissa, I have to go!
- Give it back, you guys!
- Whee!
Yeah! Whoo-hoo! Yeah, Jake!
N-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o!
My beans! Aah!
Time to join in on the fun! You guys...
Ruined everything!
- I'm gonna kill you!
- But we're undead.
Geez, we really scared her.
Nice vampire scare, guys.
Thanks. Yeah...
Pretty good, fellas.
Yeah. You guys ready...
For the next vampire lesson?
You know we are! Good!
Ow! Ugh!
W-what's the point
of this lesson?!
- Kick 'em harder!
- Ugh!
Ouch! Ow! Oh, my body! It hurts!
Oof! Okay, everyone.
Stop the toughness lesson!
W-what?
- Finn, Jake, you guys okay?
We're okay.
It's all worth it. See?
They're fine.
When did you go all soft? You
used to like teaching people
about kicks. Hey, guys.
I think you're ready
to learn how to float.
All you have to do is
jump off that ledge.
Cool.
W-wait! There's more
beginner lessons
you need to learn
before floating!
Like, uh, the spooky
vampire walk!
See? Spo-o-o-o-o-o-oky! Whoo!
No, way!
We want to fly!
You guys, stop right now!
Marceline, chill out.
It's going to be okay.
We've got a plan. Now,
get in your flying
positions.
Vampires forever! Whoo!
What are you guys waiting for?
Y-you said you had a plan.
We do.
It's to let them die.
Wee-wha-whoo! - Oh, yeah!
Oof! Whoo!
Awesome!
We did it!
Yeah! Whoo-hoo! Awesome!
Way to go, marceline.
Hey, you guys need to stop
trying to kill my friends!
They got to die someday. Hey!
Let's invite them to our place.
When they show up...
We'll suck their guts out
through their brains!
Did you see us?! Yeah,
you guys were pretty
amazing. Hey, we're
gonna throw a
party... In honor
of your new vampire
skills. Holy snaps!
That's awesome!
They're lying to you guys. They
just want to suck the guts
- out of the top of your head.
- What?!
She's just jealous of you.
We'll see you at midnight at
our place. Guys,
promise me you're not
- going to that party.
- We're not gonna go.
- You're not?
- Nah.
I'm kind of tired from doing
vampire stuff all day.
We're just gonna chill.
Oh. Okay.
Well, we're going back home.
- Peace.
- Number 25 blood drive.
Hey, guys! We're here!
Wow! Look at you guys!
That's awesome!
Um...
Hyah! Georgy, what's wrong?!
- Jake, what's happening?!
- I think they're testing
- our vampire ability!
- Oh, sweet.
Vampire kick! Ugh!
Aw, come on!
Will you knock it off already?
You know you're not even real
- vampires.
- Psh!
Then why am I flying, Wendy? Oh.
Whoa!
Yo, man.
- I think marceline tricked us.
- Yeah.
Vampire kick! Finn, Jake...
I'm so sorry I got you into
this. I should have
never pranked you
- so perfectly.
- It's okay.
You're here now to beat up
those ghosts and save us.
Oh, no, vampires
can't beat ghosts.
It's like a
rock-paper-scissors thing.
- I just came to apologize.
- Aw, man!
I can't believe we're gonna die
just 'cause we wanted to
be comfortable watching
"heat signature."
Uh, did you guys say...
"Heat signature"?
Have you located the enemy's
heat signature, private?
Yes, sir. But I also
noticed something...
Strange, something I-I...
I can't explain.
Well, spit it out, man! I-I...
I can't seem to locate
our heat signature!
- Oh!
This stinkups mega
bam-bam to the j-stop!
Can we just go back to the
brain eating, or whatever?
Mm-hmm, after the movie.
- But can't we just...
Shh! Shut!
Look out, commander!
Aah! My heat signature!
marceline is 1,000 years
old and has never seen
"heat signature."
This movie is gonna
blow their minds!
Marceline!
We've brought "heat signature"!
Woot-woot!
Whoo! Hey, so I want you all to
meet Finn and Jake. They
aren't completely lame.
What up? Guys, this is Wendy...
Hey. Boo boo...
Hello. Hello.
And georgy. Hey.
We used to be in a gang together
back in the underworld.
Hmm! Yeah, that's pretty sweet.
Hope y'all like getting your
minds blown, 'cause it's
showtime!
Ugh! What is wrong
with this couch?!
Man, that made my teeth hurt!
Oh, yeah. Sorry. I didn't
really ever sit on
there. I just float usually.
- We kind of all do.
- Ohh, what?!
Man, no fair! Yeah,
well, too bad you're
not vampires. So, anyways, I...
Wait! Hold on just a second.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
- Marceline, we insist
you turn us into vampires.
Or ghosts, or whatever... we
just want to fly. All
right, all right. Fine.
Yes! Come on, marceline!
You're gonna turn
these goofballs?
Don't worry.
I've got something way
more fun in mind.
Okay, marceline.
We're ready now. Okay.
Hold that thought.
I'm gonna perform the biting
ritual. You guys,
close your eyes, and
don't open them until I say so.
If you do, your heads will
explode! Okay, Finn. You first.
- Bite!
Chomp!
Boop, boop.
Boop, boop. Okeydokey. All done.
- How do you guys feel?
- Pretty much...
- The same.
- My neck sort of hurts.
Don't you feel a
little hungry...
- For blood?
I... I felt it! Jake,
do you feel it?
Yeah, I could go for some blood.
Oh, no!
Jake, we're gonna have to drink
blood now for all eternity!
Yeah!
What if we turn evil?!
I'll have to start wearing
cologne! Relax, guys.
You can satisfy your
bloodlust without killing.
Look.
You just eat the color.
Here, Jake. You try.
- Ahh!
- Aah! Come on!
Sorry, bro.
Oh, snap! I feel... Stronger.
Whoa.
Marceline, can we float now?
Mm, not yet.
That's a really advanced power.
First, you got to go through
vampire orientation.
Think you chumps can handle it?
♪ Oh, baby! ♪
♪ Yeah, baby! ♪
♪ Baby, baby, baby, yeah! ♪
♪ Baby, yeah, yeah! ♪
Okay, guys. The first
phase of vampire
orientation is learning...
Invisibility!
Ah, hey!
You ready for the power of...
- Invisibility?
- With all my heart!
Good. Now, spin!
Give it a whirl, Jake!
Now chant, "invisible!
Invisible!" Invisible!
Invisible!
Oof!
Yep. It worked.
- We're invisible!
- Ugh!
- You're invisible!
- Hey, then how come we
can see each other?
Because you guys became
vampires at the same time,
so you're forever linked.
Aw, yeah!
Marceline...
You're friends with
some real morons.
Oh, my God, Melissa. Ever
since Clara stopped eating
meat, her skin looks so good!
I mean, she still looks fat,
but, like, I can't say
that junk to her face.
Wow! Lsp's a hobo!
Let's mess with her. I'm
doing so awesome on my
own. Like, right
now, I found this
- can of beans. Who-o-o-o-o-o-!
Finn? Jake! Put down my stuff!
She knows it's us!
She must recognize our voices!
Let's disguise them!
We're in-vee-see-beel! Melissa!
I have to go!
They got into my toilet paper!
Melissa, I have to go!
- Give it back, you guys!
- Whee!
Yeah! Whoo-hoo! Yeah, Jake!
N-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o!
My beans! Aah!
Time to join in on the fun! You guys...
Ruined everything!
- I'm gonna kill you!
- But we're undead.
Geez, we really scared her.
Nice vampire scare, guys.
Thanks. Yeah...
Pretty good, fellas.
Yeah. You guys ready...
For the next vampire lesson?
You know we are! Good!
Ow! Ugh!
W-what's the point
of this lesson?!
- Kick 'em harder!
- Ugh!
Ouch! Ow! Oh, my body! It hurts!
Oof! Okay, everyone.
Stop the toughness lesson!
W-what?
- Finn, Jake, you guys okay?
We're okay.
It's all worth it. See?
They're fine.
When did you go all soft? You
used to like teaching people
about kicks. Hey, guys.
I think you're ready
to learn how to float.
All you have to do is
jump off that ledge.
Cool.
W-wait! There's more
beginner lessons
you need to learn
before floating!
Like, uh, the spooky
vampire walk!
See? Spo-o-o-o-o-o-oky! Whoo!
No, way!
We want to fly!
You guys, stop right now!
Marceline, chill out.
It's going to be okay.
We've got a plan. Now,
get in your flying
positions.
Vampires forever! Whoo!
What are you guys waiting for?
Y-you said you had a plan.
We do.
It's to let them die.
Wee-wha-whoo! - Oh, yeah!
Oof! Whoo!
Awesome!
We did it!
Yeah! Whoo-hoo! Awesome!
Way to go, marceline.
Hey, you guys need to stop
trying to kill my friends!
They got to die someday. Hey!
Let's invite them to our place.
When they show up...
We'll suck their guts out
through their brains!
Did you see us?! Yeah,
you guys were pretty
amazing. Hey, we're
gonna throw a
party... In honor
of your new vampire
skills. Holy snaps!
That's awesome!
They're lying to you guys. They
just want to suck the guts
- out of the top of your head.
- What?!
She's just jealous of you.
We'll see you at midnight at
our place. Guys,
promise me you're not
- going to that party.
- We're not gonna go.
- You're not?
- Nah.
I'm kind of tired from doing
vampire stuff all day.
We're just gonna chill.
Oh. Okay.
Well, we're going back home.
- Peace.
- Number 25 blood drive.
Hey, guys! We're here!
Wow! Look at you guys!
That's awesome!
Um...
Hyah! Georgy, what's wrong?!
- Jake, what's happening?!
- I think they're testing
- our vampire ability!
- Oh, sweet.
Vampire kick! Ugh!
Aw, come on!
Will you knock it off already?
You know you're not even real
- vampires.
- Psh!
Then why am I flying, Wendy? Oh.
Whoa!
Yo, man.
- I think marceline tricked us.
- Yeah.
Vampire kick! Finn, Jake...
I'm so sorry I got you into
this. I should have
never pranked you
- so perfectly.
- It's okay.
You're here now to beat up
those ghosts and save us.
Oh, no, vampires
can't beat ghosts.
It's like a
rock-paper-scissors thing.
- I just came to apologize.
- Aw, man!
I can't believe we're gonna die
just 'cause we wanted to
be comfortable watching
"heat signature."
Uh, did you guys say...
"Heat signature"?
Have you located the enemy's
heat signature, private?
Yes, sir. But I also
noticed something...
Strange, something I-I...
I can't explain.
Well, spit it out, man! I-I...
I can't seem to locate
our heat signature!
- Oh!
This stinkups mega
bam-bam to the j-stop!
Can we just go back to the
brain eating, or whatever?
Mm-hmm, after the movie.
- But can't we just...
Shh! Shut!
Look out, commander!
Aah! My heat signature!