A League of Their Own (2022–…): Season 1, Episode 2 - Find the Gap - full transcript

Max Chapman
has been unhittable today,

but her luck might be
about to change

as in steps Josh Gibson,
the homerun king.

Gibson is once again leading
the league in homeruns

for the Homestead Grays,

and hitting just about
anything thrown his way.

A thunderbolt!
She's got him blinking like a baby.

And, boy, oh, boy,
does this crowd love it.

Chapman's got the special sauce
and the fire today.

It's not every day you see the
Black Babe Ruth back on his heels.

Sorry, sweetheart.



All right, guys. Bring it in.

Hey, anybody know
who that cutie is over there?

Ha! Yeah, I know her.

Gary, I didn't know you had it in ya!

She must be deep in love.

My wife only comes to games,
and I practically have to airlift her.

But that's 'cause
she hates ya ass.

Well, what can I say,
she just keeps showing up.

Here comes
the kitten right now.

Hey, Maxine,
I'm excited for Guy and Clance's party...

Mr. Vance. Max Chapman.
Uh, I'm a pitcher, and you need me.

Oh. Is that so?

First, your pitcher,
Mr. Fowkes,

his arm isn't what it
used to be in the majors.



If I pitched practices,
he'd have time to rest it.

Also, he's developed
a tell on his curveball.

Yeah, I do not have a tell.
Who is this?

Mr. Fowkes, you puff your cheeks
every time you gonna throw a curve.

- Now, who the hell does this bitch thinks...
- Guys.

Pack it up for the day.

Oh, uh...

I'm not his girl.

Gary,
don't cry, I'll be your...

Well, you're right
about Fowkes.

I know.

I can throw a curve that looks
like a marble over the plate.

And I can do it without
sending a telegram first.

You know, a lot of these boys are going
to the Majors and the Negro Leagues.

- And the rest came from there.
- I know all about your team.

- I've been coming to these games since I was a little girl.
- I'm sorry, kid.

Everybody on the team has
to have a job at the factory.

Respectfully, sir,
I'm not leaving until you see me pitch.

You'll be sleeping here then.

So, any job at the factory?

These skirts are just...

I mean, how am I supposed
to squat in this?

They're gonna see
my... everything.

I don't think the fellas
are gonna mind too much.

I think they're cute.
Peach brings out the pink in my cheeks.

How am I
going to play in a skirt?

How am I supposed
to slide out on the field?

Hey.
Hey, maybe it's just for the pictures.

Today it's for the pictures,

but you will be playing
in them also.

This is bullshit.

Knock, knock, knock.
Everyone decent?

This is your team's
head of operations and PR,

also nephew of the esteemed
owner of our League.

This is Mr. Alan Baker.

Just Alan.
I'm my own man.

- Uh, yeah, we can't play in skirts.
- Yeah.

We're ballplayers,
not Follies Girls!

Nothing against the Follies.

- This one personally loves the Follies.
- Can't get enough!

Anyway, tomorrow is your first game
against the South Bend Blue Sox.

Wait. Hold on. Tomorrow?

We haven't even practiced.

To that end, um,
I have some news.

You, our Rockford Peaches,
will be coached by none other than...

Okay,
you can just say my name.

Former Cubs pitcher Casey Porter!

- Dove! Dove Porter!
- The King of the Forkball!

The one that
killed the bird?

- Yeah, the dove, Jo.
- Oh, right.

I love a locker room.

You know, all the things people
write on the walls, little prayers

they send up to the gods,

to, please, for the love
of George Washington,

let them have their moment.

Now, the first thing
a pitcher has to learn

is how to look in someone's
eye and read them.

Are they scared?
Are they thinking about their girlfriend?

As I stand here
looking at all of you,

I'll tell you
what I'm seeing...

That a lot of you came here
looking for your moment.

- Am I right?
- Yes, sir.

Yeah. Good.

Then I want to see fire in those eyes.
Let me see your fire.

Fire! Fire in your eyes.

Great, yeah. Fire it up!

That's right. Let me see it.
Show it to me.

Oh, light it up. Light 'em up.
That's what I'm talking about.

Now, ladies, tonight I go home to make
up our first-ever starting line-up.

So, let's go out there today and
show me why you should be on it.

Let's go!

Let's go.

- Okay
- Here we go.

All right.
This is very exciting.

Let's go!

- Clickety-clack.
- Here we go.

Clickety-clack.

Hi, there.

Uh, hi, there, as well.

It's okay.
What can I do you for?

I'm Carson Shaw,
I'm the catcher.

I'll catch the pitches.

I'm sorry.
I'm such a big fan, this is...

Okay!
You're one of my dad's favorite players.

I was just wondering if
maybe you would sign this.

Sure.

Yeah, my family doesn't really believe this is real.

Check this out.

- Wow.
- Hang on, what's this?

- Magic.
- Yeah.

Maybe your pop will magically
come around once he reads this,

"Carson Shaw is
a pro ballplayer,

"yours truly..."

Wow. Thank you.

Let me see the fire,
Carson Shaw.

Any time.

I think with the mask on,
it'll work a lot better.

'Cause I was doing it.

- Uh, okay. Okay.
- I usually, uh, learn fast.

- We'll get it. You'll get it. It's your first day.
- Okay. All right.

- See ya. I'm gonna go.
- All right.

Whoo!

This is something
I can work with.

Whoo!

Nice rip.

Nice, nice.

- Ho.
- Hey, what's-your-name.

Wanna stop making
us all look bad?

It's not my job, honey.

Here we go, Joey.

It's okay.

- Excuse me.
- Mm-hmm.

Hey.

Who taught you
to throw like that?

I taught myself.

Me too.

Show me your curve.

Okay.

Hey, Carson Shaw.
How about you make your daddy proud?

Ooh! Carson already has a new daddy?
That was quick.

It was a thing
you were not there for.

He's not my daddy.

Oof.

Huh?

I think I'm gonna
show you my forkball.

But you are gonna have
to take an oath of secrecy.

It's just an expression,
kid, I'm not swearing you in.

Oh.

All right, now, look.
The grip is simple.

You're symmetrically just getting in,
cleaning the seams,

right where you're gonna sign
your autograph in a few years.

And then,
just like a fastball...

Stay in there, Shaw.

- Okay. Okay, okay.
- There you go, Shaw.

Ho-ho! Way to get
a round on that, Shaw.

- See, does that makes sense?
- Yeah.

- All right, give it a shot.
- Okay. Thanks.

You bet.

Who is that gorgeous woman?
She looks just like my mother.

- That means you're rich!
- I don't like her.

Oh, I know who that is.
Hey, Shaw.

"Can womanhood survive the Rockford Peaches?"

What kind of
journalism is this?

Oh, for Pete's sake!
Vivienne, will you please read it?

- He sounds like my mother.
- You do.

"First women head
to the factories,

- "losing their feminine refinement..."
- Oh, God.

"And now they pick up baseball
bats and fight to the death

- "to see who can be the most masculine."
- Come on. Fight to the death?

- That's what it says.
- That's a little far-fetched.

That just put the nail in
the coffin right there, huh?

We can't even sell out
a couple of hundred seats,

the girls, they look
like truck drivers.

- All this before the first game? Please.
- Yeah!

Before game one.
Look like truck drivers.

Will you please stop
repeating me, huh?

You sound like my brother.
Very annoying.

That's why I'm here. I know what men
want to look at. I invented that.

- So, if we can get that right, the press will follow.
- That's right.

Wonderful. Thank you so much.
We cannot wait to have you here.

Great. You're welcome.

Excuse me?

Excuse me?

Hi, uh...

Excuse me?

I didn't see you there.

Hi, I'm looking for a job.
I'd like an application, please.

Oh, we don't have
any applications.

You must have missed
that pile of them right there.

Oh! There is. Oops.

But, you know what,
we don't have a pen.

- I'm sorry.
- Oh, I have a pen!

I did have a pen.

I don't anymore.

It's okay. I have my own pen.

But, you know what,
we're actually not hiring, though.

So the pen thing was wrong.

Mmm.

So then why are
all these women here?

- Volunteer sewing drive.
- Ladies' lunch.

The factory is sponsoring
a ladies' lunch

for volunteers to sew.

The Roosevelt Order says if you're
doing war work you have to consider me.

Fine. I'll consider
you right now.

And I will, as well.

The women here do more delicate
work than I think you could handle.

- Thanks for your interest.
- Bye, now.

Mm-hmm.

Ooh.

- Thank you so much.
- Aw, thank you. Thank you.

So, are you still giving me the
silent treatment or has that ended?

Did you get home okay
last night?

I'm just trying to focus
on playing ball.

Can you please
just leave me alone?

You don't want
to be left alone.

Yes, I do.

Breathe in, breathe out.
Breathe in the game.

The game is the fuel.

The fuel makes the fire.

I can see you thinking, honey.

It reminds me of something
my friend Babe used to say,

"You gotta swing from the heart,
Dove, not from the head."

Babe... Babe Ruth?

That's right.

Huh. Hmm.

It's kind of a lot for someone
who just played in majors

for three years,
don't you think?

His arm gave out.

And maybe you should listen
to him about the heart.

Oh, yeah, maybe I should.
Or maybe I should just hit the goddamn ball.

Maybe if you could.

Maybe I will,
if you would stop talking to me.

Aw, come on, Shaw.
I need a wall back there.

I wanna be calling you flypaper.

All right, let's call it
for today.

Come on, bring it around.
Bring it around. Bring it in.

Great work today, Peaches.
Give yourself some applause.

Whoo!

The world is dark.
But we are here to entertain these people

and bring them baseball,

eight to ten inches of calf,

and all the other things
that say to me "America."

Sorry. Pardon me.
Mr. D, was that it for today?

'Cause we got a game tomorrow.

I thought we were
going all night.

Ladies, we have
a group activity tomorrow.

Everyone please be downstairs
at 8:00 a.m. sharp.

- Do I need to be at that?
- You do not.

- 8:00 a.m.?
- Thank you.

Listen, I know you're nervous.
It's a very big day tomorrow.

But I like an awful lot
of what I was seeing today.

And just remember,

if you don't feel ready,
that's exactly what makes you ready.

I don't know.

I'll see you tomorrow.

What?

Good night.

Carson! Telephone.

I'm sure it was so
frustrating to have to make that pie.

You never told me
you had a sister.

You can't just
talk to people.

Oh, my goodness, Meg!
I have so much to talk to you about.

Like how you ran away
to play baseball in Illinois?

The Williamsons saw you
at the train station.

Emily said you were sweating
and your bra was out.

Yeah, it was visible,
but, like, not on purpose.

I got caught on a fence.

Do you know how embarrassing it
is for Dad to have the entire town

gossiping about
where you are?

I mean, what are they saying?

- He already has to explain why you don't have children.
- All right, well...

Everyone doesn't have babies

immediately after getting
married like you, Meg, so...

Yeah, most people do
within seven years.

I just wish Mom were here,
Carson, so you weren't my problem.

I am not a problem.

I need to get on with my day.
So I opened the mail at your house.

Charlie wrote to you.
His return is delayed.

Um, did he say why? I mean,
was there anything else in the letter?

Do you mind giving me
some privacy, please?

Sure. Here.

I think you should read
this book. You'll like it.

Carson, you know what?

Write your husband. Unless...
Are you leaving him?

What? No. Did Greta
say something to you?

And, you know, what, I did write Charlie.
He knows exactly where I am.

I was inside Baker Field, Meg.

I used to...
I used to talk about this.

I used to dream about this.

Can't you just be happy for me?

It sounds like someone's
played a game on you, Carson.

You know what?
I need to go, I have a real life.

You know what, I'll send
you newspaper clippings,

so you can see just how real my life is.

- And we know exactly what we're gonna do.
- That's right.

Take the money that we make
here and we're gonna head to...

- California.
- I'm gonna be in pictures.

I just hope that we actually
get a paycheck before then.

What are you talking about?
You don't think this is gonna last?

Eh, it's a little too good
to be true, don't you think?

No. I actually think this is the
exact amount of good to be true.

Okay. I wouldn't get your hopes up, farm girl.

I get it.

Don't get too comfortable,
we're all gonna die.

There has to be a formal warning
if death is mentioned, I think.

- That's a rule, so...
- Um, well...

I guess, I just hope that people
actually come to our games.

I think people are gonna
come to the games.

Dove Porter is our coach.

I mean, it's gonna be great.

- Has anyone actually seen the newspaper today?
- Any of you?

- Whoa.
- No.

'Cause you should. You should.

"Can womanhood survive the Rockford Peaches?"

Hey, my arms aren't burly.

Are you trying
to get in my head?

I don't know what you're talking about,
Carson.

Carson? Carson?

Yeah. You okay?

I'm worried.
Like, what if this whole thing falls apart?

Or I get cut?
I can't go home. Can't go home.

- Oh, me neither.
- Oh, but you have a husband.

I have nothing. I have a chair.

I have a gorgeous chair, but, I mean,
technically, it belongs to my parents.

It's not even my chair.

I don't know.

I feel like I'm supposed
to be here, you know?

I don't know if I've ever
felt that way before.

You think it's true?

What they wrote about us
in the paper?

You know what I think is true?

We're playing professional
baseball tomorrow.

Look at this.

Mmm.

You're getting good.

Like mother, like daughter.

Not quite.
Come on. Sit down.

- Here we go.
- Mm-hmm.

Mmm-mmm-mmm.

You know, I didn't always want
to work at a salon either.

This place almost
didn't happen.

They only gave me the loan in the
end because I have a man's name.

To this day, I think
Rockford Bank and Trust

thinks that Toni Chapman,

the owner of the finest
salon in town, is a man.

You never told me that before.

- You think I should tell them?
- Nah.

Everyone downstairs, ladies.

Very good.
Follow me into the living room.

I will take that, Mrs. Shaw.
Thank you.

Everyone into
the living room, ladies.

Two lines.

Oh! Maybe we died, and in heaven they
make your house a department store.

Like ladies,
please, not livestock.

Miss McCready.

Ladies,
please allow me to introduce Vivienne Hughes,

of Vivienne Hughes Cosmetics.
The most expensive woman on the East Coast.

Are we getting a makeover?

She's a multi-millionaire.

We should suck up to her then!

We've got a game tonight.

- We gotta get in the right headspace.
- Shh.

Ladies, I'm here to make you
palatable for an audience.

To make you look and act like
the beautiful ladies behind me.

Georgia, you gotta
stop comin' in here

already doing half your hair.
Look at this.

I just need you to do the rest.

I'm right-handed
and I can't do the other side.

- You better charge her for the whole thing!
- You know I will.

- You two are something else.
- Mornin', ladies!

- Morning!
- Nice to see you back in town.

Mrs. Turner. It is been too long.
How have you been?

Busy and blessed.

Lovely to hear.

Hello, darling.

- I can set you up right over here!
- Okay.

Make yourself at home, okay?

- Okay.
- All right.

She's in early
for the revival.

So you set her up,
but I'll take her.

- I want to make 'em extra special.
- Okay.

- All right, we'll be right with you.
- Thank you.

Hey now, Lynn,

I think that dress is the same one I
saw you wear in the market yesterday?

What? The same dress
two days in a row?

I'm not surprised.

Now, I could try to lie,

give you fools a line about how I ain't
got as many dresses as the Chapman ladies,

but I won't,
because I had a night.

- Ooh, well, good for you.
- What?

It's been, what, five years
since you had a night?

Oh. Mm-mmm. More like 35.

You remember that night we went
out with Bertie to the moonshine farm?

- Oh, that was a night!
- Now, that was a night!

Why you bring up
my sister in here?

- Mornin', all.
- Do you not know any better?

Dang, who died?

- Hey, Clance.
- Thank God.

So, what's the plan?

Well,
for my hair I was thinking something like...

You know it.

Oh, that's a good look for you.
Mm-hmm.

- Yeah, we could do that.
- Love that.

Why is this such a big deal?
We were at the wedding, it was lovely.

- The wedding sets you up as a couple.
- Exactly!

The housewarming sets you up
to the community.

You don't know what it means
to have your own house.

- Amen.
- Mm-hmm.

And, Clance,
what is this I hear about a crab boil?

Uh, yeah.

Guy's family said if
the crab boil wasn't perfect,

they're going straight back
to Louisiana, so...

Ooh, I haven't had crab since before the war.
Y'all fancy.

Max, don't forget, we have to pick
up the crab and then to Hank's

for the phonograph
and then my periwinkle dress.

Yeah. Mmm.
That does sound like a lot to carry though.

Especially,
if we wanna protect the Lena Horne hairstyle.

Yeah, it's a lot to protect.

You can use your dad's truck.

Y'all see the way they play me?

Don't look, don't look,
don't look, don't look...

- Don't... Oh!
- Too late. Sorry.

You pointed it out, I wouldn't have seen it.
And I don't care.

I got a new team.
Just gotta get the job first.

It's okay.
I'm gonna get my shot.

How're you gonna tell Toni that you got
another job? 'Cause I don't think...

I'mma just tell her.
I don't care what she thinks.

- Let's get some crab.
- Let's do it.

- Hi, Frank.
- Hey!

Here for the crab.

You know, I've never seen
crabs in real life.

Okay, it's crab. Not crabs.

Guy's gonna be so excited.

He gets emotional
over seafood.

They supposed
to look like this?

Prawns? This is
a crate of prawns.

Could've swore that was your crab,
but it's the only crate left.

Do you realize how important
the crab is for the night?

- It's a crab night. We need the crab.
- I understand that.

What kind of fish guy are you?
You didn't check the box?

- That's, like, your whole job.
- Mr. Beaumont was just here.

He must have your crab.

So what?
I'm supposed to go and find Mr. Beaumont now?

I can give you his address.
I don't know if you want...

Or, you know, that's him right there.
With the hat. He got your crab.

- Why didn't you just say that? Take that.
- Wait, hold on.

- We're taking the prawn?
- Yes.

- You wanna take the prawn?
- Leave that there.

It's a lot of liquid and...

Okay, we got the address,
so let's go to Mr. Beaumont's.

Okay, so time wise, it's either the
phonograph or the dress, right?

Yeah. I mean,
who needs music for a party anyway, right?

We can just sing
or something.

I take it back,
phonograph it is!

Uh, one second.

What? What, you see the crab?

Hey!

Here to embarrass me again?

Should I call
a crowd over to watch?

You embarrassed me, letting all
those people think I was your girl.

Didn't know that was so bad.

It's not. Uh...

Uh...

You recruiting?

Coach Vance said I need
a job to get on the team.

Listen, Maxine, even if you hadn't made a
fool of me in front of the entire team,

I can't help you.

They're not hiring
Black women.

They just won't say it straight out
because of the Roosevelt Order.

What if you submitted me as Max Chapman,
instead of Maxine?

What happens when you show up?
It's my job on the line.

Just pretend
you didn't know.

Come on, Gary!
Live a little.

I thought you had my back.

I been having your back
for a while now.

Maybe I should stop.

Max! I'm gonna go.

I'mma see you tonight, and we gonna
talk more about this, okay? Okay?

Sounds great!

- Get your ass in the car! I'm leaving!
- I'm coming. Stop!

Clance, you can't carry
them crabs by yourself!

There are five face shapes.

Only one which is
naturally attractive.

So, I think today we will be
focusing on the other four.

Okay, too Semitic.

Too mysterious.

Uh, we have vampire teeth here,
that can be filed.

- Lovely brows.
- Mmm.

Hair with volume, and lovely color.

Farm hands.

- Farm face.
- Okay. I've never even been to a farm.

From today, your whole lives,
public and private,

must reflect
our All-American values,

the board's approval
and my uncle's taste.

This is bullshit!

Yeah, I didn't think we'd have
to do this kind of stuff here.

It's like they want us
to hit a home run,

and then curtsy before them
with a crumpet in our hand.

- No thanks, chumps!
- They're making us into a joke.

Or keeping you
from becoming one.

If you want access to their world,
this is the price of admission.

Once you're in,
it's up to you to decide what you want.

So, what did you want?

Autonomy.

I built an empire,
I traveled the world.

I married a younger man.

He's kept very well,
and I keep my freedom.

You wanna glide
through the room,

you wanna float into your husband
or your husband-to-be's arms.

Someday.

- You're not married yet?
- Oh, no, I'm not married.

- Oh.
- I just got to believe my guy's out there.

Although, I hope
I hit a homer first.

Oh! Gotta go.

This is so stinkin' stupid.
Do I look like an All-American girl now?

I think you need to hold
and apply rouge.

Cool it, Shaw.

Why don't you cool it?
Stop telling me what to do.

And, curtsy.

Miss Dannely, thank you so much,
but that will be all.

- I can do it how you'd like me to do it.
- I don't believe you can. dear.

I'm so sorry, dear.
It's going to be all right.

There will be a train ticket
waiting for you after you've packed.

Why do you think
they're doing all this, Carson?

It's to make sure that we don't look
like a bunch of queers. Do you get that?

That's what all of this is.

Or maybe it just
doesn't affect you,

Mrs. Shaw.

Miss McCready,
thank you so much.

It's been a pleasure
to have you here.

- No, you can't.
- No, Jess was helping us with our makeup,

which is why she doesn't
have her makeup on yet.

Then I suggest that
you return the favor. Now.

We're gonna help you.

And, curtsy.

All right, so we just
knock on the door,

swap the prawn
for the crab,

and it over, right?

Maybe we should leave the floor
prawn in the car for now.

Let's feel it out.

Feel it out. Right. Okay.

Okay.

- Hi. Is Mrs. Beau...
- Shh.

...mont there?

Okay.

Aunt Bee had a big heart,

and she had
the best of intentions.

But when it came time for her to
help me learn how to ride that bike,

I found out that Aunt Bee didn't
know how to ride a bike either.

So, what she did...

- We need to leave.
- Not without my crab.

- You know how I feel about dead people.
- Okay, just calm down!

Sorry. Do you know if
they're gonna be serving any crab later?

I mean, not for me, for her. You know,
'cause you know how she liked her food...

Probably...

- I need to leave.
- No! No!

- Yes.
- Just calm down, okay?

Don't move,
I'm gonna find the kitchen.

Oh. Sorry, just, uh,
looking for a tissue.

I noticed that Aunt Bee
could sometimes be mean as a snake...

Damn it! Okay.
Crab, crab, crab.

Crab... Crab...

No! No!

- Oh, sweetheart.
- No!

I miss her too.
I miss her too.

Fuck, Mrs. Beaumont.

God, we need to get that crab.

We have to go to Schwartz'.

What? No! My momma
don't even go there.

Plus you know they're gonna charge us double.
We should go to Patty's,

- get your dress, and then we...
- No, I'm picking the crab.

- For Guy, I'm picking the crab.
- You sure?

Mmm.

Okay.

Remember, we're allowed
here by law.

You wanna remind them of that?
'Cause I don't think they got the memo.

Crab! Excuse me.

Excuse me, sir!

Uh, excuse me, sir.

Hi.

Uh, can...

Excuse me, sir.

Sir.

Sir, can we... Okay.

It don't matter.

It doesn't matter.
It doesn't even matter, it's fine.

It seems like
it does.

You've always had Toni
making things nice for you.

You don't know what it is to have to
build a home and a name for yourself.

I just didn't want to embarrass
myself or Guy tonight.

But look at me.
I don't have any crab,

so the invitations that I've drew
crab all over is stupid now,

and looks like I was showing off about crab,
they gonna think, "Oh, she's..."

- I'll be right back.
- Wait, what?

- Where you...
- I'll be back.

Max!

Max!

Ooh. That's a cute diner.
I'm starving.

How do you know
if your shoulders are even?

They must be even enough.
You're still here.

I gotta get my mind right
to pitch tonight.

Ugh!

Oh! Oh.
I have really specific dietary restrictions,

so I have to go to the market.

But I just realized I've actually
never been alone in public before.

Do you wanna come with me?

- Um, sure. Yeah.
- Great.

Uh, we'll meet you
at the ballpark.

Sir.

Sir?

I know you can hear me.
I'm not leaving.

So, it's fresh tuna that
has more protein? That's the thing?

You're kidding, right?

Carson, please tell me that
you're not eating canned fish.

- Botulism can and will kill you.
- Okay.

- Hi, there.
- Hi!

Uh,
half a pound of your freshest tuna please?

Yes. And I have
my ration card.

Hi. Um, we talked the other night,
I don't know if you remember.

I just wanted to clear up
anything that, um,

you might have seen
that might've felt off. Uh...

I'm not gonna say anything.
I don't care.

Okay. Okay.

Miss?

Can I help you
with anything?

Uh, actually,
I was here first.

- Right?
- Yeah, yeah. She was here first.

What do you want?

Um, I have a order here
for one Miss Lena Horne?

Oh, my God! You did not!
Oh, my God!

Be careful.

Ah!

Welcome to the All-American Girls
Professional Baseball League's first game.

And get ready to meet the South Bend
Blue Sox and your own Rockford Peaches.

- Wow, this is happening.
- Yeah.

You three were specifically
not invited to my party. Go.

We came to the party to make sure it's lame,
and it's confirmed.

- You better shut up, Cecil.
- It's Big C.

Big C, my ass!
Now take your comics and scram.

What is that?
That my Superman?

I told you not to
steal my comics!

- That's my Superman!
- No.

- Let's go.
- Remember I said I was taking it

after you got peanut butter
on my Wonder Woman.

Please.

Dumbass!
Oh, God. Welcome. Hi.

Oh! Thank you. That's nice.
Put that there, I got crabs.

Guy! We're back!

Uh, okay, here I come, baby.

Hey, don't go nowhere, y'all.

I'mma get that crab
to you in just a second now.

How you doin'? Uh...

Hey, baby. I was wondering where you were.
You all right, baby?

No, um... No, 'cause I didn't get the dress,
and I messed up,

so it's just a mess.

And I can't talk to people like that,
so I'm gonna go dress...

- All right, slow down...
- No. It's okay.

Hey, hey, I got this.

Um, can you put the crab in that
pot and watch 'em? Thank you.

All right, where is it?

Now, you're already
a case of lovely,

but I especially think
you look perfect...

in this.

Mwah.

Look at that.
Is that Lena Horne I see?

Whoa, baby,
look at the speed on that!

Our starting pitcher,
Lupe Garcia, hails from Spain.

Look out, fellas.
Her fastball is as hot as her temper.

Spain goes down
a little easier than Mexico.

Caliente!

Shirley Cohen up.

In addition to
swinging the bat,

she also enjoys playing the
flute and baking bread.

Strike!

Safe!

Strike three, you're out.

That's my girl!

Get it! Get it! Get it!
There we go.

Just like that!

There we go! There we go!

McCready!

- That's it!
- That's how you do it, Gill.

Hustle in.

Hustle in.

I'm up.

Now, that's good baseball.
Put some wood on it, Gill.

I think I will, sir.

- Wish me luck.
- Good luck.

Thanks.

Here we go, bird.

Let's go.

Greta Gill keeps them off first
base with a "come hither" look in her eye!

And, boys, she's single!

- She's lovely.
- Yes.

Who wants her telephone number?
I know I do.

Give it a knock.

- Viv, I owe ya.
- Hmm?

Oh, you're paying me. So much.

This is gonna work.

Strike!

Hey, honey,
what's your bra size?

I like to know
the players' stats!

You know, you're much prettier than
the papers make you sound.

Here we go.

Go, you got it.

Hey, if you want a date with me,
you're gonna have to shake it a little.

Strike!

You got this.
Come on. Come on!

That's right, honey.
Just keep your eyes on my balls.

Strike three, you're out!

- Is he serious?
- Did he say balls?

It's okay.
I can make it feel better.

Just blow me some more
of those kisses.

And here comes third baseman,
Jo De Luca.

Let's go, slugger.

You got this, Joey.

Fellas, she might speak softly
to you, but she carries a big stick.

All right, De Luca.

Come on, Joey!

De Luca.

Strike!

Maybe if you lost a few pounds,
we'd at least have something nice to look at.

Hey, maybe if you would learn
to shut your big, fat mouth...

Miss Gill. No.

Foul ball by De Luca.
Count now, oh and two.

Strike three! You're out!

I think she's gonna cry!

Oh, come on,
honey! Smile!

You could quit playing ball right now,
come sit on my lap! It'll feel a lot better.

She asked for it, look at her.

We can't let them
just say this shit about us.

- Yeah, make him stand up, I'll take him out at the knees.
- Yeah.

These are your customers.

And Mr. Baker can't
afford to lose any more.

So please, ladies,
chins up, smiles on.

Hey, if you wanna
fish for snapper,

you can't go after it like a
steelhead with sand shrimp, right?

Hey, you know what?
I'll take care of it.

Can I have a quick word?

Oh, my!

Hey, Momma.

Hi. You look good.

- Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.

- And thank you, Daddy.
- Anytime, kiddo.

Hey, Ellie!

- Look at her!
- Yeah, we made that.

- We did, baby.
- Mm-hmm.

Mmm. Guy.

I haven't had a boil this good
in I don't know how long.

You put your foot
in this food.

Whoo! Yes!
Told ya!

You all right?

Yeah.

Just Miss Toni
said it was good,

so that means
it's extra good.

Means I hit a home run.

That'll do it today for the
Rockford Peaches, who lose one to nothing.

Strong first outing
from Lupe Garcia.

Maybe next time, the Peaches will
bring their bats to the park.

We looked like
idiots out there.

I give us two weeks tops.

Okay, all right, we had one bad first game.
It's gonna get better.

- This is pro ball...
- It was bad.

- I know. It has to get better though, right?
- It was bad.

Does it?

- Excuse me.
- Hi.

Hi, I've come to pass on
a note from the board.

You're a bit too much
out there,

so if you could be a little sweeter,
a little, a little less.

Of course. Mm-hmm.

Good. Hmm.

Jo, you go home.
I'll meet you guys there.

- You good?
- Yeah.

We just need
a little more competition.

The girls,
they need your help.

Well, I am not a magician.

Actually, I am,
but that's besides the point.

No, Casey,
you're a coach.

Yeah. I was just going
to agree, you should...

Hey,
I came here to get back on the map, okay?

Not to have my reputation ruined
by you with this garbage.

I'm sorry, your reputation?

Look, if you wanna go back to selling
boat insurance, please, be my guest!

I'm sorry, Nathan.

If you want the game to be more exciting,
you have to shorten the skirts.

All right?
These girls just don't have the fire.

Mr. Porter.
You were right.

Right?

It goes down easier
if you know it's a joke, right?

Hey, I was just
looking for you.

I'm sorry,
about before.

Uh...

Would you
like to dance?

Yeah.

So, you give any more thought
to what I said about the job?

You don't quit!

I promise, if it goes bad,
I'll take the fall.

I would really, really,
really appreciate it, Gary.

Fine.

I'll put your name
on the list,

"Max."

Wait, that's not the only reason
you wanted to dance with me, right?

It's not the only reason.

- Hey.
- Hey.

Hey, um...

I think I left my makeup bag
in here. I, um...

Greta.

It's okay.

I really let them get to me.

It's okay to want things.
I think.

I feel like whenever I really

let myself want something,
it never really goes right.

Yeah.

I know what you mean.

I just... I really needed
this to be real.

Who says it's not real?

I mean, you did.

You said the league won't even
last two weeks, if we're lucky.

- You haven't unpacked anything.
- Okay.

They get to tell us
how long this lasts,

and what we wear,
and what our eyebrows look like,

and they get to tell us
whether or not we can

talk back to the fucking
assholes in the stands. But...

they don't get to tell us
whether or not this is real.

That's us.

Yeah.

Oh.

I like this look.

Oh, yeah?

I could've done these nails
just as good.

I prefer an after-hours
appointment.