A Different World (1987–1993): Season 6, Episode 13 - White Christmas - full transcript
Everybody's in for a big surprise when Freddie's mom comes to visit while Freddie also has some relationship trouble.
Um... hri... ha... um... fut...
Um... hri... ha... um... fut...
What did she say?
Something about her foot.
Well, who is she?
What is she doing?
Charmaine:
She been here since I got up
early this morning.
Did anybody ask
who she might be?
Hmm-mm.
Go on over.
Um... hri... ha...
Hum... fut...
Kim!
Oh, no!
I just did a double shift
at the hospital.
If it's a dorm problem,
talk to Freddie.
Freddie's not in.
She sure ain't.
All right, what's up?
Who is that?
Kim: How long has
she been here?
All morning.
Girlfriend is strange.
Strange but...
Yet familiar.
Look close, ladies.
That hair, the clothes...
Excuse me.
Hi.
I'm Kim, and you must be..?
Joni, child of god,
mother of Freddie.
Oh...
That explains it.
Yeah, right.
£ ooh £
£ I know my parents loved me £
£ stand behind me
come what may £
£ come what may £
£ I realize that I'm ready £
£ I'm ready £
£ 'cause I finally
heard them say £
£ I heard them say £
£ it's a different world £
£ it's a different world £
£ from where you come from £
£ it's a different world £
£ oh, now,
here's our chance to make it £
£ here's our chance £
£ if we focus on our goal £
£ focus on our goal £
£ if you dish it,
we can take it £
£ we can take it £
£ just remember
that you've been told £
£ that it's a different world £
£ it's a different world £
£ oh, it's a different world £
£ it's a different world £
£ from where you come from £
£ it's a different world £
£ it's a different world £
£ from where you come from £
£ it's a different world £
£ from where you come from,
yeah. £
good morning, sir.
May I take your order, please
and while you're
trying to decide
allow me to refill
your bottomless cup.
I'll have a hot,
steaming helping of you.
No, no, no.
Rule number one
at the international
cottage of flapjacks
is don't mix hanky-panky
with pancakes.
This is the cottage of Wayne
and we don't have no pancakes
without hanky-panky.
Come here!
Explain something to me.
Why does my wife have
to work on Christmas Eve?
So your wife can buy you
a Christmas present.
You don't have
to buy me a present.
All I want for Christmas
is you, under the tree
unwrapped...
And I know all you want
is me, right?
Right.
Right.
So, where's my love child?
Freddie's probably
at the law school library
you know, checking out books.
Come on, sister.
She's probably at her
boyfriend's checking him out.
Mmm...
I'm sensing a little
inner tension here.
No, I'm fine.
Uh-huh. That's called denial
and it's all around us.
You, sister...
Let it out.
Let what out?
Oh... I'm sensing
something deep.
You mean Lance?
Our breakup?
I'm not upset anymore.
Even though I wasted four years
of my precious life
I no longer wish to rip his
heart out on Valentine's day.
I'm over it.
Ha!
There you go... denial.
And you.
I didn't break up with nobody.
I'm looking for Lance's number.
Kim, Kim...
Share with us.
You know, at the present,
I don't feel like sharing.
You were raised
the same way I was...
To hold it in.
As a holistic psychologist,
I urge you
to let it out.
Here... punch a pillow.
No, thanks.
Come on.
We all need to do it.
This is for bigotry, chauvinism
injustice, Republicans,
naugahyde!
Joni!
Freddie!
Joni!
I can't believe it!
You're here!
Now, my mother ain't
never said hello to
me like that before.
You're really here!
Is that a new tattoo?
A school of baby whales.
I love this tattoo, joni.
Look at you, sister.
Where did your hair go?
I'm evolving my look.
What do you think?
Do your thing.
I am.
Oh, joni,
I want you to meet Ron.
Ron, Ron...
Kim's Ron.
Honeyboom, honeyboom.
Look, I really have to be going.
It was very nice meeting you.
Joni:
Kim, are you okay?
I'm fine.
Joni!
Shazza!
Shazza, brother.
Shazza:
How you doing?
You know, Freddie's dad
is still talking
about that sweat lodge
we did last spring.
Oh, so intense!
The four of us, naked...
Chanting...
Releasing our toxins.
Under the full moon.
So, Freddie
what are you and Shazza
doing for Christmas?
I thought you'd like to join
your dad and me in Guatemala.
I have to tell you
Shazza and I aren't
together anymore
and, uh...
Ron is my new man.
Whoa! Rewind.
Listen, joni,
I got some things to do.
I'll check you out later.
We'll rap, all right?
So, Ron...
Groovy to meet you, Ron.
You too, joni.
It's real... groovy.
She's feeling your aura.
Oh.
All right, Ms. Gilbert-Wayne
in the next eight hours
you will serve
over 1,000 cups of coffee
and 5,000 pancakes.
I won't be doing it
all alone, will I?
Sorry I'm late!
Oh, hi!
I'm grace,
and you're... "Whitey."
Oh, that's cute.
It's whitley.
They left the "l"
off my name tag.
Well, we'll get you
a new name tag tomorrow
if you last... ha!
Well, grace and I
will be working together?
No, you'll be working.
As the owner's daughter,
grace will spend eight hours
on the phone with her boyfriend.
Hi, baby. Guess who.
Yes! It is!
What are they talking about?
You can see why we need someone
with your experience.
It was five years
at a truck stop in...
In texarkana.
It was called the grit stop.
How very picturesque.
Oh, no way! God!
Merry Christmas to you.
Can I help you to your table?
This lovely foursome
for a window seat?
How are you, sir?
Good...
Whitley, I need to talk
to you over here.
Menus! Menus!
They need menus.
You won't believe...
Grace.
I'm on the phone, whitey.
Whitley!
Okay, Kimberly, talk fast.
It's Ron and Freddie.
I've tried to be mature
about everything
but I'm not feeling mature...
Get 'em in, get 'em fed,
get 'em out.
May I take your order, ma'am?
I know this is childish
but all I can think about
is Ron and Freddie in bed.
Two pigs in a blanket!
Until I talked to you,
I didn't realize
I had my yin confused
with my Yang.
That's why I ain't got nobody.
Hold it, hold it.
Mr. Gaines, have you ever
tried asking forgiveness
of this animal you're eating?
You want me to talk
to this drumstick?
Just try it once.
Well, hello...
And good-bye.
Joni!
I'm finished
with all my classes.
I thought we could just
hang out and rap...
Joni, I have been in denial...
Denial about Lance
and the whole thing
and it's driving me
out of my mind.
Ho-ho-hold it.
Take this healing crystal.
It will help quiet your spirit.
How does it work?
Try putting it in your mouth.
Joni, can we go?
Okay, one minute, one minute.
Lena, Lena, your poetry...
Mind-blowing.
Sort of Maya angelou
meets flavor flav.
Well, I try.
Your mother's amazing.
She's always had a way
with my friends.
When I was young
she used to turn my sleep-overs
into protest rallies.
She's so good
at stirring things up.
So are you.
I miss you.
Things have been
very intense, Shazza
especially now.
I thought I knew
where I was heading
and then joni shows up, and...
Seeing joni reminds me
of the best of who you are.
She was my role model
and I always planned to grow up
to be just like her.
She always told me
if you want something,
just go for it.
I couldn't agree more.
There you go.
Oh, I had the French crepes.
I thought you said French toast.
Anyway, same country.
Uh-huh.
Mm-hmm.
Whitey, get me a cup of decaf.
Thanks.
So, Freddie, why didn't we just
got back to your room?
Well, it's away from campus.
We can be one on one
without your little fan club.
Whoa, I'm sensing
a little something here.
Okay, sister, just let it out.
You're right, joni.
I'm sorry.
Joni, I'm confused.
I thought that I knew who I was
and I thought that I knew
who I wanted to be with.
So, why didn't you tell me
about Ron?
You hate Ron, right?
And you'd rather
that I'm with Shazza.
Oh, sounds like your psyche
is deeply divided.
Don't analyze me.
Admit it, joni...
You hate my hair.
Whether you wear your hair
natural or bald
whether you choose Ron or Shazza
I would never interfere.
I'm asking you...
Joni:
Oh, is that Kim?
Kimmy.
Kim, hi.
Join us, sister.
Hey, joni.
Hi, Freddie.
I don't want
to disturb you guys.
She's not disturbing us,
is she, Freddie?
Sit down.
Of course not.
After all, you two
are best friends
which is why I'm moved
to say something here.
I'm feeling
some unsisterly vibes.
Unsisterly vibes?
Communicate or suffer the Karma.
It's ridiculous.
We're fine, aren't we, Kimmy?
Uh-huh.
Let it out, sister.
Kim?
Freddie, I know I said
I was fine about you and Ron
but I'm not...
Not the way you've been
sneaking around behind my back.
Not the way
you've treated our friendship
if friendship
is still the right word.
All right.
Okay, yes!
Now doesn't that feel better?
Yeah, it does.
Kim, wait,
you and Freddie haven't...
Hugged.
That was cool, joni...
The way you didn't interfere.
Well, at least
she's being honest.
Can I be honest with you?
I am sick of calling you joni.
We've always been best friends...
More like sisters.
Yes, exactly, that's my problem!
It's like that movie, Chinatown.
Mother, sister, mother, sister,
mother, sister.
Ow.
Why did you come here?
Freddie, I was going
to take your order now.
So impatient.
Do you know Freddie?
I've known her for years.
Went to school with her.
She's a little
whee-whoo, whee-whoo.
I'm her mother.
She's never talked to me
like that before.
Uh, miss Brooks?
Miss Brooks?
There she was, kissing Shazza
and wearing the Pearl earrings
that I bought her.
Real Pearl earrings.
I mean, I'm Ron Johnson.
I'm the one that's supposed
to do the two-timing
not her.
Better think again, man.
I know what it is.
It's bad Karma
for what I did to Kim.
You reap what you sow, Ron.
Oh, sure, cast the first stone
after you ruined
Byron's wedding.
Wait a minute
I got what I wanted.
What about you?
I'm going to go get what I want.
I'm going to have it out
with Shazza.
You don't want to do that.
Shazza will drag you
all over this campus.
No, he wouldn't.
It's not all about Shazza.
What do you want for Christmas,
a black eye?
No, I...
I want Freddie.
Then go get your woman, boy.
You know, you right
and I ain't coming back
until I got her, baby.
That's my man.
At least I'm coming back
with them real Pearl earrings.
Hi.
Oh, hi.
I just have one thing to say.
I'm going to break up with Ron.
Kim...
I just told you that
I'm going to break up with him.
I just...
I have just one question, okay?
When did it happen
between you and Ron?
Oh, man.
Kim, it didn't...
We weren't together together
until after you guys broke up.
Really?
It's true.
I'm telling you the truth.
I know that I'm not
acting like myself
and I've never been
in a situation like this before
and I know that I'm not
handling things very well.
Today...
Today I let Shazza kiss me.
Oh, you're really on a roll, ha.
Yes, I am.
I'm rolling right downhill.
I'm hurting people
and I'm not being very nice
and I'm all messed up.
Oh, come on, Freddie.
All right, I hear you.
I mean, you are
a little messed up
but I still love you, okay?
Can we please be friends, Kim?
Yes!
Hey, you want to punch a pillow?
Don't make fun of my mother.
No, listen, I'm not trying
to make fun of your mother.
As a matter of fact,
she was very helpful.
Yes.
My mother was helpful,
wasn't she?
If wasn't for your mom...
We wouldn't even be talking.
Merry Christmas, Freddie.
Merry Christmas, Kim.
Oh, my god.
I've got to get your present
out of the dumpster.
I'll be right back.
The bacon grease is flying...
What do these look like to you?
It looks like a happy face.
Here are the two eyes,
a little red nose
and the bacon makes
a slight smile
like the Mona Lisa.
No, you twit.
They're sunny side up.
They're supposed
to be scrambled.
Now they're scrambled.
Joni.
I'm so sorry...
No, no, no.
I'm the one
who should apologize.
You needed a mother,
not a psychologist.
So I'm going
to make it up to you
starting right now.
I don't approve of Ron.
My mother's intuition
tells me he's nothing
but a lifetime of trouble.
Shazza is the man for you.
There, is that what you needed?
That's not what I want.
Listen...
No, you listen to me.
22 years ago,
your grandmother took one look
at the black man I loved
and told me I was making
the biggest mistake of my life.
When I was pregnant
she started wearing
a black armband.
She said your life would be
like Vietnam... unwinnable.
I swore I was going
to prove her wrong...
That you would have
more possibilities
than she ever dreamed of.
So, sister, if you think
I'm going to tell you what to do
and who to be with,
you're wrong.
Just as anybody who tries
to take away our choices
is wrong.
So who in the hell
do you want to be with?
You.
I want to be with you.
Any objections?
Brother, as I always
told Freddie
if you want something in life,
go for it!
£ joy to the world £
£ the lord is come... £
Oh, Dwayne!
This is so beautiful.
Merry Christmas, baby.
I got you something.
You said no presents, whitley.
I know, but...
You got me a computer?
Just a picture of it.
I can't really get
the computer yet
but that's the computer
I would have gotten you.
And I would have loved it, baby.
Thank you.
Actually, I think you're
going to have to wait
a little longer than
I anticipated for the computer
because
I was just recently fired.
On your first day?
Oh, baby, it's all right.
I know exactly what's
going to cheer you up.
Your present.
You got me mine?
I knew it, I knew it!
Yes, and you're going
to love it.
It's going to keep you warm
all winter long.
But we can't afford it.
Well, I couldn't leave it
in the store.
Sit down.
I'm a Princess.
That's right.
Close your eyes.
You close them eyes.
No peeking.
Your eyes aren't closed.
No peeking.
Oh, Dwayne, come on,
we can do that later.
Now hand over the fur.
Okay, just keep your hands out.
Yeah.
Oh, pookie, it's beautiful.
Um... hri... ha... um... fut...
What did she say?
Something about her foot.
Well, who is she?
What is she doing?
Charmaine:
She been here since I got up
early this morning.
Did anybody ask
who she might be?
Hmm-mm.
Go on over.
Um... hri... ha...
Hum... fut...
Kim!
Oh, no!
I just did a double shift
at the hospital.
If it's a dorm problem,
talk to Freddie.
Freddie's not in.
She sure ain't.
All right, what's up?
Who is that?
Kim: How long has
she been here?
All morning.
Girlfriend is strange.
Strange but...
Yet familiar.
Look close, ladies.
That hair, the clothes...
Excuse me.
Hi.
I'm Kim, and you must be..?
Joni, child of god,
mother of Freddie.
Oh...
That explains it.
Yeah, right.
£ ooh £
£ I know my parents loved me £
£ stand behind me
come what may £
£ come what may £
£ I realize that I'm ready £
£ I'm ready £
£ 'cause I finally
heard them say £
£ I heard them say £
£ it's a different world £
£ it's a different world £
£ from where you come from £
£ it's a different world £
£ oh, now,
here's our chance to make it £
£ here's our chance £
£ if we focus on our goal £
£ focus on our goal £
£ if you dish it,
we can take it £
£ we can take it £
£ just remember
that you've been told £
£ that it's a different world £
£ it's a different world £
£ oh, it's a different world £
£ it's a different world £
£ from where you come from £
£ it's a different world £
£ it's a different world £
£ from where you come from £
£ it's a different world £
£ from where you come from,
yeah. £
good morning, sir.
May I take your order, please
and while you're
trying to decide
allow me to refill
your bottomless cup.
I'll have a hot,
steaming helping of you.
No, no, no.
Rule number one
at the international
cottage of flapjacks
is don't mix hanky-panky
with pancakes.
This is the cottage of Wayne
and we don't have no pancakes
without hanky-panky.
Come here!
Explain something to me.
Why does my wife have
to work on Christmas Eve?
So your wife can buy you
a Christmas present.
You don't have
to buy me a present.
All I want for Christmas
is you, under the tree
unwrapped...
And I know all you want
is me, right?
Right.
Right.
So, where's my love child?
Freddie's probably
at the law school library
you know, checking out books.
Come on, sister.
She's probably at her
boyfriend's checking him out.
Mmm...
I'm sensing a little
inner tension here.
No, I'm fine.
Uh-huh. That's called denial
and it's all around us.
You, sister...
Let it out.
Let what out?
Oh... I'm sensing
something deep.
You mean Lance?
Our breakup?
I'm not upset anymore.
Even though I wasted four years
of my precious life
I no longer wish to rip his
heart out on Valentine's day.
I'm over it.
Ha!
There you go... denial.
And you.
I didn't break up with nobody.
I'm looking for Lance's number.
Kim, Kim...
Share with us.
You know, at the present,
I don't feel like sharing.
You were raised
the same way I was...
To hold it in.
As a holistic psychologist,
I urge you
to let it out.
Here... punch a pillow.
No, thanks.
Come on.
We all need to do it.
This is for bigotry, chauvinism
injustice, Republicans,
naugahyde!
Joni!
Freddie!
Joni!
I can't believe it!
You're here!
Now, my mother ain't
never said hello to
me like that before.
You're really here!
Is that a new tattoo?
A school of baby whales.
I love this tattoo, joni.
Look at you, sister.
Where did your hair go?
I'm evolving my look.
What do you think?
Do your thing.
I am.
Oh, joni,
I want you to meet Ron.
Ron, Ron...
Kim's Ron.
Honeyboom, honeyboom.
Look, I really have to be going.
It was very nice meeting you.
Joni:
Kim, are you okay?
I'm fine.
Joni!
Shazza!
Shazza, brother.
Shazza:
How you doing?
You know, Freddie's dad
is still talking
about that sweat lodge
we did last spring.
Oh, so intense!
The four of us, naked...
Chanting...
Releasing our toxins.
Under the full moon.
So, Freddie
what are you and Shazza
doing for Christmas?
I thought you'd like to join
your dad and me in Guatemala.
I have to tell you
Shazza and I aren't
together anymore
and, uh...
Ron is my new man.
Whoa! Rewind.
Listen, joni,
I got some things to do.
I'll check you out later.
We'll rap, all right?
So, Ron...
Groovy to meet you, Ron.
You too, joni.
It's real... groovy.
She's feeling your aura.
Oh.
All right, Ms. Gilbert-Wayne
in the next eight hours
you will serve
over 1,000 cups of coffee
and 5,000 pancakes.
I won't be doing it
all alone, will I?
Sorry I'm late!
Oh, hi!
I'm grace,
and you're... "Whitey."
Oh, that's cute.
It's whitley.
They left the "l"
off my name tag.
Well, we'll get you
a new name tag tomorrow
if you last... ha!
Well, grace and I
will be working together?
No, you'll be working.
As the owner's daughter,
grace will spend eight hours
on the phone with her boyfriend.
Hi, baby. Guess who.
Yes! It is!
What are they talking about?
You can see why we need someone
with your experience.
It was five years
at a truck stop in...
In texarkana.
It was called the grit stop.
How very picturesque.
Oh, no way! God!
Merry Christmas to you.
Can I help you to your table?
This lovely foursome
for a window seat?
How are you, sir?
Good...
Whitley, I need to talk
to you over here.
Menus! Menus!
They need menus.
You won't believe...
Grace.
I'm on the phone, whitey.
Whitley!
Okay, Kimberly, talk fast.
It's Ron and Freddie.
I've tried to be mature
about everything
but I'm not feeling mature...
Get 'em in, get 'em fed,
get 'em out.
May I take your order, ma'am?
I know this is childish
but all I can think about
is Ron and Freddie in bed.
Two pigs in a blanket!
Until I talked to you,
I didn't realize
I had my yin confused
with my Yang.
That's why I ain't got nobody.
Hold it, hold it.
Mr. Gaines, have you ever
tried asking forgiveness
of this animal you're eating?
You want me to talk
to this drumstick?
Just try it once.
Well, hello...
And good-bye.
Joni!
I'm finished
with all my classes.
I thought we could just
hang out and rap...
Joni, I have been in denial...
Denial about Lance
and the whole thing
and it's driving me
out of my mind.
Ho-ho-hold it.
Take this healing crystal.
It will help quiet your spirit.
How does it work?
Try putting it in your mouth.
Joni, can we go?
Okay, one minute, one minute.
Lena, Lena, your poetry...
Mind-blowing.
Sort of Maya angelou
meets flavor flav.
Well, I try.
Your mother's amazing.
She's always had a way
with my friends.
When I was young
she used to turn my sleep-overs
into protest rallies.
She's so good
at stirring things up.
So are you.
I miss you.
Things have been
very intense, Shazza
especially now.
I thought I knew
where I was heading
and then joni shows up, and...
Seeing joni reminds me
of the best of who you are.
She was my role model
and I always planned to grow up
to be just like her.
She always told me
if you want something,
just go for it.
I couldn't agree more.
There you go.
Oh, I had the French crepes.
I thought you said French toast.
Anyway, same country.
Uh-huh.
Mm-hmm.
Whitey, get me a cup of decaf.
Thanks.
So, Freddie, why didn't we just
got back to your room?
Well, it's away from campus.
We can be one on one
without your little fan club.
Whoa, I'm sensing
a little something here.
Okay, sister, just let it out.
You're right, joni.
I'm sorry.
Joni, I'm confused.
I thought that I knew who I was
and I thought that I knew
who I wanted to be with.
So, why didn't you tell me
about Ron?
You hate Ron, right?
And you'd rather
that I'm with Shazza.
Oh, sounds like your psyche
is deeply divided.
Don't analyze me.
Admit it, joni...
You hate my hair.
Whether you wear your hair
natural or bald
whether you choose Ron or Shazza
I would never interfere.
I'm asking you...
Joni:
Oh, is that Kim?
Kimmy.
Kim, hi.
Join us, sister.
Hey, joni.
Hi, Freddie.
I don't want
to disturb you guys.
She's not disturbing us,
is she, Freddie?
Sit down.
Of course not.
After all, you two
are best friends
which is why I'm moved
to say something here.
I'm feeling
some unsisterly vibes.
Unsisterly vibes?
Communicate or suffer the Karma.
It's ridiculous.
We're fine, aren't we, Kimmy?
Uh-huh.
Let it out, sister.
Kim?
Freddie, I know I said
I was fine about you and Ron
but I'm not...
Not the way you've been
sneaking around behind my back.
Not the way
you've treated our friendship
if friendship
is still the right word.
All right.
Okay, yes!
Now doesn't that feel better?
Yeah, it does.
Kim, wait,
you and Freddie haven't...
Hugged.
That was cool, joni...
The way you didn't interfere.
Well, at least
she's being honest.
Can I be honest with you?
I am sick of calling you joni.
We've always been best friends...
More like sisters.
Yes, exactly, that's my problem!
It's like that movie, Chinatown.
Mother, sister, mother, sister,
mother, sister.
Ow.
Why did you come here?
Freddie, I was going
to take your order now.
So impatient.
Do you know Freddie?
I've known her for years.
Went to school with her.
She's a little
whee-whoo, whee-whoo.
I'm her mother.
She's never talked to me
like that before.
Uh, miss Brooks?
Miss Brooks?
There she was, kissing Shazza
and wearing the Pearl earrings
that I bought her.
Real Pearl earrings.
I mean, I'm Ron Johnson.
I'm the one that's supposed
to do the two-timing
not her.
Better think again, man.
I know what it is.
It's bad Karma
for what I did to Kim.
You reap what you sow, Ron.
Oh, sure, cast the first stone
after you ruined
Byron's wedding.
Wait a minute
I got what I wanted.
What about you?
I'm going to go get what I want.
I'm going to have it out
with Shazza.
You don't want to do that.
Shazza will drag you
all over this campus.
No, he wouldn't.
It's not all about Shazza.
What do you want for Christmas,
a black eye?
No, I...
I want Freddie.
Then go get your woman, boy.
You know, you right
and I ain't coming back
until I got her, baby.
That's my man.
At least I'm coming back
with them real Pearl earrings.
Hi.
Oh, hi.
I just have one thing to say.
I'm going to break up with Ron.
Kim...
I just told you that
I'm going to break up with him.
I just...
I have just one question, okay?
When did it happen
between you and Ron?
Oh, man.
Kim, it didn't...
We weren't together together
until after you guys broke up.
Really?
It's true.
I'm telling you the truth.
I know that I'm not
acting like myself
and I've never been
in a situation like this before
and I know that I'm not
handling things very well.
Today...
Today I let Shazza kiss me.
Oh, you're really on a roll, ha.
Yes, I am.
I'm rolling right downhill.
I'm hurting people
and I'm not being very nice
and I'm all messed up.
Oh, come on, Freddie.
All right, I hear you.
I mean, you are
a little messed up
but I still love you, okay?
Can we please be friends, Kim?
Yes!
Hey, you want to punch a pillow?
Don't make fun of my mother.
No, listen, I'm not trying
to make fun of your mother.
As a matter of fact,
she was very helpful.
Yes.
My mother was helpful,
wasn't she?
If wasn't for your mom...
We wouldn't even be talking.
Merry Christmas, Freddie.
Merry Christmas, Kim.
Oh, my god.
I've got to get your present
out of the dumpster.
I'll be right back.
The bacon grease is flying...
What do these look like to you?
It looks like a happy face.
Here are the two eyes,
a little red nose
and the bacon makes
a slight smile
like the Mona Lisa.
No, you twit.
They're sunny side up.
They're supposed
to be scrambled.
Now they're scrambled.
Joni.
I'm so sorry...
No, no, no.
I'm the one
who should apologize.
You needed a mother,
not a psychologist.
So I'm going
to make it up to you
starting right now.
I don't approve of Ron.
My mother's intuition
tells me he's nothing
but a lifetime of trouble.
Shazza is the man for you.
There, is that what you needed?
That's not what I want.
Listen...
No, you listen to me.
22 years ago,
your grandmother took one look
at the black man I loved
and told me I was making
the biggest mistake of my life.
When I was pregnant
she started wearing
a black armband.
She said your life would be
like Vietnam... unwinnable.
I swore I was going
to prove her wrong...
That you would have
more possibilities
than she ever dreamed of.
So, sister, if you think
I'm going to tell you what to do
and who to be with,
you're wrong.
Just as anybody who tries
to take away our choices
is wrong.
So who in the hell
do you want to be with?
You.
I want to be with you.
Any objections?
Brother, as I always
told Freddie
if you want something in life,
go for it!
£ joy to the world £
£ the lord is come... £
Oh, Dwayne!
This is so beautiful.
Merry Christmas, baby.
I got you something.
You said no presents, whitley.
I know, but...
You got me a computer?
Just a picture of it.
I can't really get
the computer yet
but that's the computer
I would have gotten you.
And I would have loved it, baby.
Thank you.
Actually, I think you're
going to have to wait
a little longer than
I anticipated for the computer
because
I was just recently fired.
On your first day?
Oh, baby, it's all right.
I know exactly what's
going to cheer you up.
Your present.
You got me mine?
I knew it, I knew it!
Yes, and you're going
to love it.
It's going to keep you warm
all winter long.
But we can't afford it.
Well, I couldn't leave it
in the store.
Sit down.
I'm a Princess.
That's right.
Close your eyes.
You close them eyes.
No peeking.
Your eyes aren't closed.
No peeking.
Oh, Dwayne, come on,
we can do that later.
Now hand over the fur.
Okay, just keep your hands out.
Yeah.
Oh, pookie, it's beautiful.