A.N.T. Farm (2011–2014): Season 3, Episode 8 - PANTs on Fire - full transcript
Chyna accidentally injests Dixon's truth serum.
Subs created by: David Coleman.
Ah! Finally, finished
with all my homework.
I don't know what I learned,
but I know I'm done learning.
Hey, Chyna!
You wanna come with me to a lecture at
the history of Voice Modulation Museum?
Today's topic is...
Using Monotone For Lack of Emphasis.
It's going to be crazy exciting.
Olive, I would love to go, but...
I'm just so swamped with homework.
Oh, really?
Because this is going to be the best
history of voice modulation event
since their symposium
on sing-song inflection.
Loved it!
Sounds awesome!
But I can't go. I have to study.
History.
Math.
Student directory.
Fu's Dragon takeout menu.
I don't believe this!
There are extra credit
courses I didn't know about?
Well, you have fun.
Unfortunately, I'm going to be stuck
inside all day, having no fun at all.
This is so much fun! You ready?
I hit the ball!
See, I'm not uncoordinated,
despite what all those
mean kids and medical professionals say.
Chyna?
What are you doing here? I
thought you were studying.
I am.
I'm just finishing up
the last of my reading.
"Made in the Philippines".
Fascinating.
Really? Because it looks
like you're playing ping pong.
No!
We were about to play ping pong.
We haven't even started yet.
All right. Your serve.
The score is 675 to zero.
♪Ooh, ooh. Ooh. Doo, doo.
♪Ooh, ooh. Ooh. Doo, doo.
Woo!
♪Everybody's got that thing.
♪Something different, we all bring.
♪Don't you let 'em, clip your wings.
♪You got it! You got it!
♪We're on fire and we
blaze, in extraordinary ways.
♪365 days.
♪We got it! We got it!
♪You can dream it. You can be it.
♪If you can feel
it, you can believe it!
♪Because I am, you are, we are...
♪Exceptional.
♪Exceptional!
♪Yeah, I am, you are, we are...
♪Exceptional.
♪Exceptional!
♪Ooh, ooh, ooh. Ooh, ooh.
Woo!
Wow, Chyna. I can't
believe you lied to me.
What?
I would never lie to you.
The truth is...
I did have a ton of homework but,
living with you must
have rubbed off on me,
because I finished it all in no time.
Literally, no time.
You're not lying to me about
not lying to me, are you?
Olive, if I'm lying to you,
may a lightning bolt come out of
the sky and strike Fletcher down.
What ever happened to "cross my heart"?
Okay. Thank you for
being honest with me.
Anyway, since you did all your homework,
it's "Open Mike" night at the Morgue.
They're going to
autopsy a guy named Mike.
You want to go with me?
Sure. I would love to go see
a dead stranger's insides.
Okay, let's go!
Hey, Fletcher, check
out what I found online!
You know when a guy excitedly tells another
guy "check out what I found online!"
The other guy isn't
expecting to look at a tree.
It's not just any tree.
It's my family tree.
Turns out I'm related to the
royal family of Luxembourg!
Angus, you're related to royalty?
Why didn't you ever tell me that?
Um, one, because I just found out.
And, two, because you told
me to never talk to you.
Well, that was when you were a nobody.
Now you're a nobody
related to a somebody.
That's true.
But I've been emailing with my cousin.
His dad's the King.
Does that make you a Prince?
No, but my cousin is.
Oh.
He's coming to visit and he wants to
have dinner with me tomorrow night!
I can't believe a Prince is coming!
All my years of being incredibly
beautiful are finally going to pay off!
You have to introduce me.
Actually, I'm thinking of
telling him not to come.
What? Why?
Well, I don't feel comfortable
being with those fancy people.
I'm more down-to-Earth.
Okay, being down-to-Earth isn't
the same thing as being dirty.
But maybe I can help you feel comfortable
about meeting your royal cousin.
Nobody knows more about elegance,
grace and proper manners than I do.
Really? Because you just
threw me out of a chair.
Excuse me! Was I talking to you?
Hey, Dixon, I need to ask
your advice about Olive.
We just got back from a staring contest.
Oh, you had a staring contest?
We didn't have one. We went to one.
To watch.
For three hours.
What do you do when Olive
makes you do boring stuff?
You mean like listening to
her best friend's problems?
Exactly!
Anyway, Olive keeps inviting
me to things that I don't like.
So, I either have to go, or I
have to lie to get out of going.
And I hate lying.
Well, you don't need to
worry about lying anymore.
What do you mean?
As part of my spy training, I've developed
the next generation of truth serum.
I put a test batch in the
bran muffin you just ate.
What?
That's how we entice
our enemies to eat it.
I mean, who can resist a bran muffin?
They're full of fiber, and it's a
known fact, no matter what country...
"Everyone needs to poop".
Come on. There's no such
thing as truth serum.
As if a muffin could make me tell you
that I haven't done laundry in a month,
so this morning I sniffed all
the blouses in my hamper until
I found the one that was the
least stinky and put it on.
Why did I just say that?
Because the truth serum makes you blurt
out the truth, whether you want to or not.
Oh, no. This is horrible!
More horrible than your breath,
which smells like a small rodent crawled
into your mouth and died inside of it.
And as if things couldn't
get worse, now I have to poop!
Okay, let's begin
your etiquette lessons.
Lesson one, when out
in society put on pants.
All the time?
Maybe we should start
with something simple.
How to interact with servants.
Dinner is served.
Because I should have known there's a
catch when Lexi invited me to dinner.
Angus, what do you say?
- Thanks, Fletcher.
- No!
Don't give them names!
That is not how royalty behaves.
Watch me.
You call this poached salmon?
No.
It's a grilled cheese sandwich.
Lexi, I don't know if I can
ever be as classy as you.
Hey, I hate your haircut.
You look like a shaved poodle.
Why did I say that?
Stupid truth serum!
There's that cute guy.
Don't say anything insulting to him.
I sweat when I eat apples.
Hey, Chyna!
The Time-Keeping Museum just got
in some Mesopotamian sundials!
Wanna come check them out?
It starts promptly when the big
shadow hits the Babylonian lion.
Don't hurt her feelings. Just
smile and agree to go with her.
That sounds more boring
than the staring contest.
What are you talking about? That staring
contest went into double overtime!
- You told me you had fun.
- Yeah, I lied.
Just like I lied yesterday to get
out of all those other boring things.
Fine!
If all the things I
like to do are so boring,
then you never have to do
anything with me ever again.
And it's your loss, because
I was about to invite you to
the opening of the new History
of History Museums Museum.
Okay, when the dinner begins tonight, the
first thing you do is take your napkin...
Wait. What do I need another napkin for?
I'm already wearing this neck napkin.
That is a tie.
The napkin is to keep your pants clean.
Now I have to wear clean pants?
Where does it end?
Ooh, meat cake!
That's a steak!
You know what? Let's just skip dinner.
Let's practice dancing.
It's a very important aspect
of high-society gatherings.
Got it.
♪ Ooh, I'm shaking my heiny!
Ooh, I'm shaking my heiny!
No. I meant let's
practice ballroom dancing.
And before you get any ideas,
you will not be dancing with me.
- Oh.
- Here's your partner.
La, la, la, la, la, la, la.
Goodness gracious me, I would
be ever so delighted to dance!
You're paying me double for this.
Mmm.
- How's it going, Chyna?
- Horrible.
Olive is so mad she
won't even talk to me!
And what's the horrible part?
The horrible part is, I hurt my
best friend's feelings because
I ate that stupid serum
that makes me tell the truth.
Truth serum, huh?
So, are you madly in love with me?
No, not at all.
Good news, Chyna.
Looks like the truth serum wore off.
No, it hasn't!
Well, I better go before I
tell you that I bite my nails.
My toenails.
Chyna didn't eat any of
that salad dressing, did she?
Why, what's in it?
Oh, Olive Oil, garlic, salt,
pepper, anti-truth serum.
- Oh, and parsley.
- Really?
It has parsley? Where
did you find parsley?
It has anti-truth serum.
If you eat it, it makes it
impossible to tell the truth.
Wait, Chyna was complaining about
how she could only tell the truth.
Maybe this will solve her problem.
Huh! Well, if it isn't Chyna.
You know, I would give
you the silent treatment,
but that would just be punishing myself.
Because interesting
factoid, I like to talk.
Olive, when I said you were boring.
I really meant it.
What's going on? That's not true.
Why did I say that?
Wow. You know, it feels like you
don't want to be my friend anymore.
But I do! More than anything.
I don't! Not in the least.
Fine!
Olive! Don't wait! Get away from me!
Chyna! Great news!
I just bought all new instruments to
make the music program even better.
That's the dumbest idea I've ever heard!
I didn't think the music program
could get any worse, but it just did.
I don't understand this!
Everything I say is coming out a lie.
I'm sorry you feel that way.
Do you have any other
complaints about my school?
Yes! I hate everything
about it! Especially you!
Well, I don't need some high school
student to make me feel bad about myself.
I've got all the women in
Northern California to do that!
And if you hate my school
so much, you can leave.
You're expelled.
What? That's great!
I'll call your parents
and have them come get you.
Please do! I would love that!
Olive, I really do not
want to talk to you!
Perfect. Then we finally
agree about something.
I know! I can write it down.
Olive, I am so, so sorry.
"Olive, I am not sorry at all".
How can I make her understand?
Wait, I know!
Olive, I'm not wearing
a black and white shirt.
- Yeah, you are.
- And I hate singing.
What? Singing is your
favorite thing in the world.
I am completely in love with Fletcher.
You can't stop lying!
What happened? Did you eat some of
Dixon's anti-truth salad dressing?
No! That's exactly what I didn't do!
Why are they doing?
Mr. Grundy didn't expel me from school.
Don't stop! I want you
to pack up all my things!
And that guitar is not a collector's
item, so please do not be careful with it!
Can you believe it? We're
about to meet the royal family.
And look at us!
I'm stunning, like almost Goddess-like!
And you...
You're also here.
Thank you.
Any minute my dashing Prince is
gonna ride in on a White Horse.
Ready to sweep me off on his...
What is that stench?
That's me!
Is you the Angus Chestnut what done sent
me an electronic mail saying we's kin?
- Indeed I am, kind gentleman.
- Oh!
Wait. You're from the
royal family of Luxembourg?
That's right. I is Joseephus Royal.
All the way from the town of
Luxembourg, in Swamp Creek County.
Angus, What is going on?
You said you were related to a King!
Uh, he is. My pappy is a King.
The Live Bait King!
His worms are dirt cheap!
I can't believe I wasted all my time
teaching you manners to
meet this toothless hayseed!
I ain't toothless! I got
me all kinds of tooths!
Shoot, I even got a mole on
my back that's got a tooth!
You have got to be kidding me! Ugh!
Hey, can I come visit
the Bait Kingdom sometime?
Sure thang!
Why don't you hitch a ride
on our private air-o-plane?
You can be our guest for the
grand opening of our 100th store.
In Italy, Europe.
Wait. You have a private plane?
- Mmm.
- And 100 stores?
Mmm hmm.
My golly gracious me, where
my manners done gone to?
Okay.
Call Chyna's father.
You know, I make those phones.
Mr. Grundy, don't listen to me!
I really do not need to talk to you!
Chyna, maybe you should
let me do the talking.
Not because you keep lying, but because
as I mentioned earlier, I like to talk.
What's going on?
Mr. Grundy, Chyna accidentally
took some anti-truth
serum and now she's
lying about everything.
That's why she told
you she hates it here.
- Is this true, Chyna?
- Nope. Olive is making all this up.
And she's secretly planning
to overthrow the government!
Come on, there's no such
thing as an anti-truth serum.
And Olive, overthrowing
the government is a highly
inappropriate project
for your civics class.
Oh, no! What are we going to do?
I don't have an idea!
I am a numbskull!
Call Chyna's father.
Dixon, it's a long story, but I
need some anti-truth salad dressing.
Sorry, but I can't give it to you.
It's a highly classified
top-secret weapon.
If our enemies ever
got their hands on it,
they could use it to destroy
our entire way of life!
If you don't give it to
me, I'll break up with you.
Would you like thousand
island or balsamic vinaigrette?
Why didn't I spring
for the protection plan?
Mr. Grundy, before you
call Chyna's parents
and tell them she's expelled,
you have to taste this salad.
You'll hate it. It's disgusting!
No, thank you.
Come on. Try the salad.
What, are you afraid?
No.
I'm on a strict no fruits
and vegetables diet.
Why do you think I'm so Zazow?
Uh, that's my line! Plus,
you say it like this!
Za-zow!
Za-zow!
You stretch out that last syllable.
Ah! Like...
Za-zow?
Mmm!
Oh!
That's delicious!
Give me more!
I think it's working.
Sir, tell me your name.
Zoltan Grundy.
Baldy Smellybottom III.
And how much do you weigh?
Two hundred and thirty-six pounds.
Two hundred and thirty-five pounds.
What's going on?
That doesn't matter, you have
an important call to make.
Bad point.
I almost remembered.
Mr. Parks, this is
Baldy Smellybottom III.
I'm calling to tell you
that Chyna is very happy
here and has not been
expelled from school.
You're not welcome.
Oh...
Now I don't get it.
So now you believe Chyna
took the anti-truth serum?
And she can stay?
Absolutely not!
This is the worst news ever!
Listen, I really don't
appreciate you helping me.
And I'm not sorry I hurt your feelings.
Thanks. And I'm sorry too.
I told you never to lie to me, and when
you told me the truth, I got mad at you.
I don't forgive you.
You know how much I hate you, right?
I love you, too.
I can't believe I almost blew
my chances with your cousin.
How am I supposed to know how to
treat people if they don't look rich?
How about being nice to
everyone, no matter their wealth?
You're hilarious!
Anyway, I'm ready to learn
how to fit in with low society.
Okay, first lesson is spitting.
Let me see you spit on the floor.
I am a lady!
A lady does not spit on the floor.
Fine.
Spit into this can.
Thank you.
Next lesson, how to
bait a hook with worms.
You have worms in your pocket?
Ugh! Gross!
If you think I'm going
to dance with you...
I'm not dancing! The worms
found a hole in my pants pocket.
Angus, we've got to focus.
Now that word's gotten out
that your cousin's rich,
I'm going to have some
serious competition.
La, la, la, la, la, la, la.
I sure would love to
go to Italy, Europe.
On your private air-o-plane.
La, la, la, la, la, la, la.
Ah! Finally, finished
with all my homework.
I don't know what I learned,
but I know I'm done learning.
Hey, Chyna!
You wanna come with me to a lecture at
the history of Voice Modulation Museum?
Today's topic is...
Using Monotone For Lack of Emphasis.
It's going to be crazy exciting.
Olive, I would love to go, but...
I'm just so swamped with homework.
Oh, really?
Because this is going to be the best
history of voice modulation event
since their symposium
on sing-song inflection.
Loved it!
Sounds awesome!
But I can't go. I have to study.
History.
Math.
Student directory.
Fu's Dragon takeout menu.
I don't believe this!
There are extra credit
courses I didn't know about?
Well, you have fun.
Unfortunately, I'm going to be stuck
inside all day, having no fun at all.
This is so much fun! You ready?
I hit the ball!
See, I'm not uncoordinated,
despite what all those
mean kids and medical professionals say.
Chyna?
What are you doing here? I
thought you were studying.
I am.
I'm just finishing up
the last of my reading.
"Made in the Philippines".
Fascinating.
Really? Because it looks
like you're playing ping pong.
No!
We were about to play ping pong.
We haven't even started yet.
All right. Your serve.
The score is 675 to zero.
♪Ooh, ooh. Ooh. Doo, doo.
♪Ooh, ooh. Ooh. Doo, doo.
Woo!
♪Everybody's got that thing.
♪Something different, we all bring.
♪Don't you let 'em, clip your wings.
♪You got it! You got it!
♪We're on fire and we
blaze, in extraordinary ways.
♪365 days.
♪We got it! We got it!
♪You can dream it. You can be it.
♪If you can feel
it, you can believe it!
♪Because I am, you are, we are...
♪Exceptional.
♪Exceptional!
♪Yeah, I am, you are, we are...
♪Exceptional.
♪Exceptional!
♪Ooh, ooh, ooh. Ooh, ooh.
Woo!
Wow, Chyna. I can't
believe you lied to me.
What?
I would never lie to you.
The truth is...
I did have a ton of homework but,
living with you must
have rubbed off on me,
because I finished it all in no time.
Literally, no time.
You're not lying to me about
not lying to me, are you?
Olive, if I'm lying to you,
may a lightning bolt come out of
the sky and strike Fletcher down.
What ever happened to "cross my heart"?
Okay. Thank you for
being honest with me.
Anyway, since you did all your homework,
it's "Open Mike" night at the Morgue.
They're going to
autopsy a guy named Mike.
You want to go with me?
Sure. I would love to go see
a dead stranger's insides.
Okay, let's go!
Hey, Fletcher, check
out what I found online!
You know when a guy excitedly tells another
guy "check out what I found online!"
The other guy isn't
expecting to look at a tree.
It's not just any tree.
It's my family tree.
Turns out I'm related to the
royal family of Luxembourg!
Angus, you're related to royalty?
Why didn't you ever tell me that?
Um, one, because I just found out.
And, two, because you told
me to never talk to you.
Well, that was when you were a nobody.
Now you're a nobody
related to a somebody.
That's true.
But I've been emailing with my cousin.
His dad's the King.
Does that make you a Prince?
No, but my cousin is.
Oh.
He's coming to visit and he wants to
have dinner with me tomorrow night!
I can't believe a Prince is coming!
All my years of being incredibly
beautiful are finally going to pay off!
You have to introduce me.
Actually, I'm thinking of
telling him not to come.
What? Why?
Well, I don't feel comfortable
being with those fancy people.
I'm more down-to-Earth.
Okay, being down-to-Earth isn't
the same thing as being dirty.
But maybe I can help you feel comfortable
about meeting your royal cousin.
Nobody knows more about elegance,
grace and proper manners than I do.
Really? Because you just
threw me out of a chair.
Excuse me! Was I talking to you?
Hey, Dixon, I need to ask
your advice about Olive.
We just got back from a staring contest.
Oh, you had a staring contest?
We didn't have one. We went to one.
To watch.
For three hours.
What do you do when Olive
makes you do boring stuff?
You mean like listening to
her best friend's problems?
Exactly!
Anyway, Olive keeps inviting
me to things that I don't like.
So, I either have to go, or I
have to lie to get out of going.
And I hate lying.
Well, you don't need to
worry about lying anymore.
What do you mean?
As part of my spy training, I've developed
the next generation of truth serum.
I put a test batch in the
bran muffin you just ate.
What?
That's how we entice
our enemies to eat it.
I mean, who can resist a bran muffin?
They're full of fiber, and it's a
known fact, no matter what country...
"Everyone needs to poop".
Come on. There's no such
thing as truth serum.
As if a muffin could make me tell you
that I haven't done laundry in a month,
so this morning I sniffed all
the blouses in my hamper until
I found the one that was the
least stinky and put it on.
Why did I just say that?
Because the truth serum makes you blurt
out the truth, whether you want to or not.
Oh, no. This is horrible!
More horrible than your breath,
which smells like a small rodent crawled
into your mouth and died inside of it.
And as if things couldn't
get worse, now I have to poop!
Okay, let's begin
your etiquette lessons.
Lesson one, when out
in society put on pants.
All the time?
Maybe we should start
with something simple.
How to interact with servants.
Dinner is served.
Because I should have known there's a
catch when Lexi invited me to dinner.
Angus, what do you say?
- Thanks, Fletcher.
- No!
Don't give them names!
That is not how royalty behaves.
Watch me.
You call this poached salmon?
No.
It's a grilled cheese sandwich.
Lexi, I don't know if I can
ever be as classy as you.
Hey, I hate your haircut.
You look like a shaved poodle.
Why did I say that?
Stupid truth serum!
There's that cute guy.
Don't say anything insulting to him.
I sweat when I eat apples.
Hey, Chyna!
The Time-Keeping Museum just got
in some Mesopotamian sundials!
Wanna come check them out?
It starts promptly when the big
shadow hits the Babylonian lion.
Don't hurt her feelings. Just
smile and agree to go with her.
That sounds more boring
than the staring contest.
What are you talking about? That staring
contest went into double overtime!
- You told me you had fun.
- Yeah, I lied.
Just like I lied yesterday to get
out of all those other boring things.
Fine!
If all the things I
like to do are so boring,
then you never have to do
anything with me ever again.
And it's your loss, because
I was about to invite you to
the opening of the new History
of History Museums Museum.
Okay, when the dinner begins tonight, the
first thing you do is take your napkin...
Wait. What do I need another napkin for?
I'm already wearing this neck napkin.
That is a tie.
The napkin is to keep your pants clean.
Now I have to wear clean pants?
Where does it end?
Ooh, meat cake!
That's a steak!
You know what? Let's just skip dinner.
Let's practice dancing.
It's a very important aspect
of high-society gatherings.
Got it.
♪ Ooh, I'm shaking my heiny!
Ooh, I'm shaking my heiny!
No. I meant let's
practice ballroom dancing.
And before you get any ideas,
you will not be dancing with me.
- Oh.
- Here's your partner.
La, la, la, la, la, la, la.
Goodness gracious me, I would
be ever so delighted to dance!
You're paying me double for this.
Mmm.
- How's it going, Chyna?
- Horrible.
Olive is so mad she
won't even talk to me!
And what's the horrible part?
The horrible part is, I hurt my
best friend's feelings because
I ate that stupid serum
that makes me tell the truth.
Truth serum, huh?
So, are you madly in love with me?
No, not at all.
Good news, Chyna.
Looks like the truth serum wore off.
No, it hasn't!
Well, I better go before I
tell you that I bite my nails.
My toenails.
Chyna didn't eat any of
that salad dressing, did she?
Why, what's in it?
Oh, Olive Oil, garlic, salt,
pepper, anti-truth serum.
- Oh, and parsley.
- Really?
It has parsley? Where
did you find parsley?
It has anti-truth serum.
If you eat it, it makes it
impossible to tell the truth.
Wait, Chyna was complaining about
how she could only tell the truth.
Maybe this will solve her problem.
Huh! Well, if it isn't Chyna.
You know, I would give
you the silent treatment,
but that would just be punishing myself.
Because interesting
factoid, I like to talk.
Olive, when I said you were boring.
I really meant it.
What's going on? That's not true.
Why did I say that?
Wow. You know, it feels like you
don't want to be my friend anymore.
But I do! More than anything.
I don't! Not in the least.
Fine!
Olive! Don't wait! Get away from me!
Chyna! Great news!
I just bought all new instruments to
make the music program even better.
That's the dumbest idea I've ever heard!
I didn't think the music program
could get any worse, but it just did.
I don't understand this!
Everything I say is coming out a lie.
I'm sorry you feel that way.
Do you have any other
complaints about my school?
Yes! I hate everything
about it! Especially you!
Well, I don't need some high school
student to make me feel bad about myself.
I've got all the women in
Northern California to do that!
And if you hate my school
so much, you can leave.
You're expelled.
What? That's great!
I'll call your parents
and have them come get you.
Please do! I would love that!
Olive, I really do not
want to talk to you!
Perfect. Then we finally
agree about something.
I know! I can write it down.
Olive, I am so, so sorry.
"Olive, I am not sorry at all".
How can I make her understand?
Wait, I know!
Olive, I'm not wearing
a black and white shirt.
- Yeah, you are.
- And I hate singing.
What? Singing is your
favorite thing in the world.
I am completely in love with Fletcher.
You can't stop lying!
What happened? Did you eat some of
Dixon's anti-truth salad dressing?
No! That's exactly what I didn't do!
Why are they doing?
Mr. Grundy didn't expel me from school.
Don't stop! I want you
to pack up all my things!
And that guitar is not a collector's
item, so please do not be careful with it!
Can you believe it? We're
about to meet the royal family.
And look at us!
I'm stunning, like almost Goddess-like!
And you...
You're also here.
Thank you.
Any minute my dashing Prince is
gonna ride in on a White Horse.
Ready to sweep me off on his...
What is that stench?
That's me!
Is you the Angus Chestnut what done sent
me an electronic mail saying we's kin?
- Indeed I am, kind gentleman.
- Oh!
Wait. You're from the
royal family of Luxembourg?
That's right. I is Joseephus Royal.
All the way from the town of
Luxembourg, in Swamp Creek County.
Angus, What is going on?
You said you were related to a King!
Uh, he is. My pappy is a King.
The Live Bait King!
His worms are dirt cheap!
I can't believe I wasted all my time
teaching you manners to
meet this toothless hayseed!
I ain't toothless! I got
me all kinds of tooths!
Shoot, I even got a mole on
my back that's got a tooth!
You have got to be kidding me! Ugh!
Hey, can I come visit
the Bait Kingdom sometime?
Sure thang!
Why don't you hitch a ride
on our private air-o-plane?
You can be our guest for the
grand opening of our 100th store.
In Italy, Europe.
Wait. You have a private plane?
- Mmm.
- And 100 stores?
Mmm hmm.
My golly gracious me, where
my manners done gone to?
Okay.
Call Chyna's father.
You know, I make those phones.
Mr. Grundy, don't listen to me!
I really do not need to talk to you!
Chyna, maybe you should
let me do the talking.
Not because you keep lying, but because
as I mentioned earlier, I like to talk.
What's going on?
Mr. Grundy, Chyna accidentally
took some anti-truth
serum and now she's
lying about everything.
That's why she told
you she hates it here.
- Is this true, Chyna?
- Nope. Olive is making all this up.
And she's secretly planning
to overthrow the government!
Come on, there's no such
thing as an anti-truth serum.
And Olive, overthrowing
the government is a highly
inappropriate project
for your civics class.
Oh, no! What are we going to do?
I don't have an idea!
I am a numbskull!
Call Chyna's father.
Dixon, it's a long story, but I
need some anti-truth salad dressing.
Sorry, but I can't give it to you.
It's a highly classified
top-secret weapon.
If our enemies ever
got their hands on it,
they could use it to destroy
our entire way of life!
If you don't give it to
me, I'll break up with you.
Would you like thousand
island or balsamic vinaigrette?
Why didn't I spring
for the protection plan?
Mr. Grundy, before you
call Chyna's parents
and tell them she's expelled,
you have to taste this salad.
You'll hate it. It's disgusting!
No, thank you.
Come on. Try the salad.
What, are you afraid?
No.
I'm on a strict no fruits
and vegetables diet.
Why do you think I'm so Zazow?
Uh, that's my line! Plus,
you say it like this!
Za-zow!
Za-zow!
You stretch out that last syllable.
Ah! Like...
Za-zow?
Mmm!
Oh!
That's delicious!
Give me more!
I think it's working.
Sir, tell me your name.
Zoltan Grundy.
Baldy Smellybottom III.
And how much do you weigh?
Two hundred and thirty-six pounds.
Two hundred and thirty-five pounds.
What's going on?
That doesn't matter, you have
an important call to make.
Bad point.
I almost remembered.
Mr. Parks, this is
Baldy Smellybottom III.
I'm calling to tell you
that Chyna is very happy
here and has not been
expelled from school.
You're not welcome.
Oh...
Now I don't get it.
So now you believe Chyna
took the anti-truth serum?
And she can stay?
Absolutely not!
This is the worst news ever!
Listen, I really don't
appreciate you helping me.
And I'm not sorry I hurt your feelings.
Thanks. And I'm sorry too.
I told you never to lie to me, and when
you told me the truth, I got mad at you.
I don't forgive you.
You know how much I hate you, right?
I love you, too.
I can't believe I almost blew
my chances with your cousin.
How am I supposed to know how to
treat people if they don't look rich?
How about being nice to
everyone, no matter their wealth?
You're hilarious!
Anyway, I'm ready to learn
how to fit in with low society.
Okay, first lesson is spitting.
Let me see you spit on the floor.
I am a lady!
A lady does not spit on the floor.
Fine.
Spit into this can.
Thank you.
Next lesson, how to
bait a hook with worms.
You have worms in your pocket?
Ugh! Gross!
If you think I'm going
to dance with you...
I'm not dancing! The worms
found a hole in my pants pocket.
Angus, we've got to focus.
Now that word's gotten out
that your cousin's rich,
I'm going to have some
serious competition.
La, la, la, la, la, la, la.
I sure would love to
go to Italy, Europe.
On your private air-o-plane.
La, la, la, la, la, la, la.