Pørni (2021–…): Season 1, Episode 6 - You'll never walk alone - full transcript

Leo is confirmed and Pørni gives the speech Anne was to give. The client Torunn goes further than sending threats and poop in the mail. Hanna and Sigrid must have an enlightening conversation about their father.

From Municipal-Bjørnar: Can we talk?
I'll be in your garage in 15 minutes.

- Hello.
- Hi.

So you got the message?

There was a mix-up with the messages.
The one you got was meant for Sigrid.

That was awkward.

I don't know what you're
thinking right now,

but there's something
I need to say.

- And that is that me and Therese...
- That's not my business.

No, don't... Let me finish.

The two of us... It has
never been anything serious.

I just had to talk to her
and explain how things are.



How are things?

The thing is, I don't care that
you're 13 years older than me.

You're the coolest
woman on earth,

and I am very much
in love with you.

I love you, I think.
Actually. Possibly.

And it's too soon to say that.
I get that. In my book, too.

Or maybe not. Maybe
now is the right time.

It's perfect.

Won't listen to it anyway. I'll
call back as soon as possible.

Hey, hey, hey, it's me.

I just wanted to give you some juicy
gossip about the municipal lawyer,

but I can't do that, so...

But you'd like him,
to say the least.

He delivers.



Okay. Bye.

SUCK IT UP

It's one of those filters that
makes you look like a child.

Look at this. That's me.

Pørni, there's a bit of a crisis her,
so I need you to take Astrid's solo.

- Me?
- Sorry.

I know you've got the confirmation,
but this won't go away.

Please.

- You know that song.
- Yes, but...

Hey, I'll make two lasagnas,
leaving you only six to go.

I'll do it.

- You can bake a cake.
- Okay.

That's great. You'll
take care of it.

- Mommy?
- "Mommy"? That's nice.

I've always been
really into aesthetics.

Okay?

And I've been thinking that I
should study something creative.

I've found a school with a
three-year art director study course

that I really want to
apply to. In Copenhagen.

In Copenhagen?

Yes. All the studies
show that creativity

will be one of the most
sought-after traits in the future.

And I can live with Dad.

Can't you think about this
while you're in Argentina?

If I apply now, I
can start this fall.

Are you going to
drop the whole trip?

Are you aware how far
away Argentina is?

I want to spend more time with
Dad. I want to live with him.

I understand that, but it's
Iben's apartment, right?

- That might not be...
- Why are you so negative?

I finally found something I want
to do, and you're being negative.

I'm not negative.

I just don't think it's smart to jump
onto a three-year course on impulse.

Maybe you should
take a drawing course

while you're in Argentina and
see if it's right for you?

- Do you want to get rid of me?
- Of course not, Hanna.

Then why aren't
you supporting me?

You talk to me like
I'm eight years old

and can't make any
independent choices.

No, sweetie...

You're only pretending you're
suffering to make me feel bad.

Sorry, I don't know what my
face is supposed to look like.

- Iben's not right in the head, and...
- Don't blame Iben!

You're just jealous
because Dad's doing fine.

You know what, Hanna? I support you
no matter what you choose to do.

Okay?

I haven't been here for
you the way I should have

these past six months, since
I've been sad about Anne.

But I support you no matter what
you do, and I'm here for you.

Okay.

Take some more of
the green ones.

Pørni, you know you can
rent proper tablecloths too?

Yes.

So why don't you? Damask
tablecloths are much nicer.

Yes, and the Grand Hotel's
mirror salon is nicer as well,

but sometimes you have
to make some choices.

Hi, Dad.

It's going fine.
I'm folding napkins.

Are you? When? Can we meet?

No, I can't tomorrow.
It's Leo's confirmation.

No, Pørni's making us go
to a concert on Sunday.

Hold on.

Can Dad come to
the confirmation?

Yes, of course.

You can come to
the confirmation.

I have something really
cool to tell you.

Cool. Love you too. Bye.

No, I want to say hi to him.

You'll see him tomorrow.

Grandpa said you're going to buy a
rowing machine and an exercise bike.

Where will you put them?

- Where I will put them?
- We don't have room.

We'll have room when
you move to Copenhagen.

- Will they be in my room?
- It's not your room.

I know you own this
house, but it's my room.

It would be nice to know
that you're kicking me out.

A heads-up would've been
great. But now I know.

I don't have to touch it if
it's that important to you.

We both know you're not going
to use that bike anyway.

Hey! The confirmation candidate!

Did you learn
anything important?

I don't know. We learned
to put condoms on bananas.

That's important.

You can play, but
only until 11, okay?

Sigrid, can you go brush
your teeth? Big day tomorrow.

- Dad, Stephen's coming, right?
- Yes, he's on his way.

He'll put the lasagne in the
oven and take care of the rest.

Don't you worry.

Hi! You look great!

Hanna curled my hair, but
I did the makeup myself.

This calls for a
group hug. Come on.

You're the prettiest girls
in all Northern Europe.

Leo! You look
great in that suit!

Anne would've been proud of you.

We'll save the speech for later.
The taxi will be here soon.

If you need to pee, do it now.

Sigrid, if you're not in
that taxi when it arrives,

you'll have to walk
there by yourself, okay?

Come here.

You're gorgeous.

- Dad!
- Hello!

Hey!

There's nothing going on here now.
We're going to City Hall first.

I'm just giving the girls some
gifts. I can't come afterwards.

- You're not coming?
- Grandma fell down the stairs.

- I have to go visit her.
- Shit. Poor thing.

She'll be okay, but I have to
visit her. But I'll come tomorrow.

If your strict mom can manage
without you at the amateur concert.

By the way, I've decided
to drop Argentina

and move to Copenhagen
instead, to you.

To me? Well, that's a surprise.

Yeah, and I've found a school
I really want to apply to.

They have an AD line. I've
always wanted to draw.

You want to live with me?

Yeah. I thought
that would be nice.

That won't work, because I've turned
the guest room into an office.

- My book's coming out in October.
- Congratulations.

Thanks. You're in the book.

There's a ton of book
launches this fall,

and Iben's not feeling well.
She's in the book a lot.

But good luck with the studies.
There's lots of places you can live.

Hello!

Hanna, you two can talk about
this over dinner tomorrow.

- You're not coming today?
- Grandma fell down the stairs.

Mom said you don't have
to go to the concert.

- I've brought you lots of presents.
- The taxi's here!

Don't you want us to
come to your concert?

I'll probably have a lot of concerts.
Get in the taxi. Confirmation time.

I'll book a table at
Smalhans for five o'clock.

If you're not there,
I'll strangle you.

If you let those kids down
again, the gloves are coming off.

Fucking hell, I
want to kill you.

That's good.

You were really cute, but you
also had some psychopathic traits,

like every kid has.

You thought everything
was about you.

You thought a telephone
was called a Leo-phone

and that an elephant
was called a Leo-phant.

You were pretty young, Leo.
I think you were seven.

And now you're a little
older. You're a teenager.

And being a teenager
can be pretty rough.

It might be extra
difficult for you.

I'm very proud of how you

and the rest of us try to
be there for one another

and figure out how to deal
with the fact that Anne's gone.

I'm very proud of you,
Leo, and so is Charlie.

So are Torstein and
Birgitte and Ole Johan.

I mean Baldwin. Sorry, Dad.

We're terribly proud of
you, and we love you.

Anne always told me not to
suck on the lollipop of grief.

She also said that either it
will be fine, or it will pass.

The fact that we miss Anne

probably won't pass,
but it will get better.

I promise. We love you, Leo.

Congratulations.

Okay, time for a
toast. A toast to Leo.

And to the speech.

Oh, it's very big.

- You won't get married.
- I already am.

Torstein has refurbished
that old office now,

so Leo will have a real
bedroom when he comes.

Okay.

Didn't we agree not to
talk about that today?

Mom, that was
really out of line.

- Did I say something wrong?
- No.

I thought it was sorted.

Don't come in.

Seriously, don't come in.

No...

Watch your cunt. I have a
lot of dull scissors waiting.

I meant to get rid of
it before you saw it.

A lady was in the yard, so I
thought I should check it out.

Torunn's a little crazy,

but she's not dangerous.
Did she scare you?

No. It's fine.

But I want to live here.

If you want me here.

Of course I want you here.

What would I do without you? I
just need to get Charlie to agree.

He says he's going to meet
Therese with the pearl earrings.

Why? What did he say?

"See you at the
concert tomorrow!

I'll stare at the longest tits..."
Sorry, it's an inside joke.

"I have to stop by Therese's tonight.
She was a real mess just now.

Miss you and think about you."

Then something dirty
you don't need to hear.

"Call you later." Smiley face,
hug face, heart face, kiss face.

But why does he
have to meet her?

Maybe she called and was sad,

and he thinks he owes her one last...
It's the right thing to do, right?

No, there's nothing right about that.
How long did they date? Like a week?

Nobody owes anyone anything.

This is just a
wrench in the works.

You'll laugh about it tomorrow.

He said he was going to call. It's
10:30, and he sent it at 7:45.

What did you reply?

"Okay, see you tomorrow!"
Exclamation mark.

Without an emoji?

- A thumbs-up.
- An ice-cold thumbs-up?

You can blame yourself, Pørni.
Oh my God, how clueless.

I can call him and ask.

Not after you sent him
an ice-cold thumbs-up!

Ice-cold thumb? Isn't
it just a thumbs-up?

No, it's not just a thumbs-up!

You have a concert tomorrow. Stephen
and I will take it from here.

Pørni, go to bed.

And you two teenagers
should get out of here.

Okay. Thank you so much
for tonight. It was great.

If he replies now, you're
not touching that keyboard

until you've called me. I'll
tell you exactly what to write.

Okay. Thanks for the help.

- Bye.
- Good night. Bye.

Send a "good night" with
two hearts and kisses.

Then put it out of your mind.
He's a good guy. I can tell.

How did it go with Therese?
Call me when you can!

TO MUNICIPAL-BJØRNAR

I have my own cell
phone! This is my number.

I look forward to
seeing you tomorrow.

TO DAD

Why don't we have a Tesla?

Please don't pull
a Greta Thunberg.

Shouldn't you put on
make-up for the concert?

Cut me some slack. I feel like
I get nothing but criticism.

Sorry. Just trying to help.

- Mom, are you sad?
- No, sorry.

I'm just a bit stressed out.

Have fun. Say hi to dad. Call
Grandpa if you need anything.

Sure. Good luck.
Don't screw it up.

I love you!

Hi, you've reached
Bjørnar Berg Hansen.

I can't come to the phone right
now. Leave a message after the beep.

Hi.

I don't mean to nag.
I'm just a bit anxious.

Are you coming to the concert?
Should I save you a seat?

Please call me. Okay, bye.

Damn it! Can't you see I'm
getting ready to drive?

Damn pig!

Why don't they have Coke here?

It's the kind of place
that only serves eco-stuff.

- They could still serve Coke.
- Yeah.

What did you get from Dad?

- Bath bombs from Body Shop.
- That's cool.

Sure, but we don't
have a bathtub.

- Dad probably doesn't know that.
- No.

But he probably should.

No, absolutely not. That's
a good color for you.

A handsome guy wants to speak
with you in the sacristy.

That's what I said. He came!

- Okay. Can you take my purse?
- Sure.

Don't be late. We're
starting our warm-up.

- Great. Are you ready?
- Yes.

We'll start the warm-up.

- Hi! You came!
- Hi.

Sorry for...

I didn't mean to...

I just couldn't do
it over the phone.

I've been at
Therese's all night.

We talked. Nothing else.
I'm not interested in that.

I mean it.

The thing is...

She's...

It's so stupid.

Therese is pregnant.

By me.

And she wants to keep the child.

And I feel really stupid.

And I'm sorry I'm making
this so difficult for you.

- It's okay.
- No.

It's not okay. It's not.

I...

I want to be with you.
That's what I want.

- I really have to...
- I want you.

Go back inside.
Astrid lost her voice.

- Can...
- I'm sorry.

Do you want to order now,
or are you still waiting?

- We'll wait a little longer.
- Okay.

- Maybe something happened.
- I'm not saying this to be mean,

but maybe we just
have a shitty dad.

What do you mean?

A real dick of a dad.

A cunt dad.

A man-whore of a shit dad.

A prick shit.

We can't just sit here. Come on.

Okay, now.

Hi! No...

- Hello! "Hello" is good, right?
- Yes.

- You have to start over.
- Yeah.

Hello, it's Anne.

- Sorry.
- Oh my God.

- Why do you have to film me?
- You're so pretty.

This is just weird.

Hello. This is Anne. I can't
come to the phone right now,

because I'm having a damn
good time with my sister.

- You can't use that. You can't swear.
- Of course I can swear.

It was nice, but a bit too much.

- Hi.
- Hi.

I just wanted to say that

you're a good mom.

I know you do a lot for us.

Things we don't know about, too.

That's all.

I love you.

Love you too.