iZombie (2015–…): Season 5, Episode 3 - Five, Six, Seven, Ate! - full transcript
Previously on iZombie...
Meet your girlfriend somewhere you're
not rubbing Dale's nose in it.
I understand why you broke
up with me. I love you for it.
Clive. How would you
like to be a father?
- Where's Baron?
- He's gone.
When I found Jordan, she
was digging brain tubes
out of bus station garbage cans.
Take cover!
Look out!
She died saving your sergeant.
if humans decide we only
have zombie interests at heart,
this city will collapse.
_
I was talking to my
therapist about the last
time you went to lunch
with your mother.
And he thinks she has borderline
personality disorder.
- Right? She's the worst.
- Mmm-hmm.
So, can you come with us
to lunch tomorrow?
I'll cancel my chiro appointment.
Oh. My. God. You're totally saving me.
I kinda wanna do
that solo part more with you.
I know I should be the focus but I still
think you need to be a part of it.
Pretty. Your solo turn shimmy
is what's gonna win it for us,
you gorgeous talent machine.
Ugh. This new protein powder
is disgusting. Taste it.
- Ugh.
- I have to go rinse my mouth.
You know, for that solo, if you want,
I could be on my knees
behind you leading your hips.
The most important thing
is that you feel good.
Pretty!
G!
Pretty!
_
I've been saving this up
for a while, so...
♪ That girl was poisoned ♪
As was that guy, with cyanide.
It's very sad.
Cyanide acts fast. Would've
killed them in under a minute.
They were healthy otherwise.
Quite fit actually.
Gulliver Marlowe and Nancy
Duvall were dance partners.
They were about to compete for a spot
on the show Dance of a Lifetime.
The prize? Two tickets out of Seattle.
Ooh, high stakes.
And according to the woman who runs the
dance studio where they all practiced,
Nancy and Gulliver
were the team to beat.
With five remaining couples
in the competition,
there are at least ten people with strong
motives for wanting these two dead.
So, which brain do I eat?
Eenie meenie minie mo? I can
blindfold you and spin you around.
Call it.
Uh, heads, Gulliver. Tails, Nancy.
Luck be a lady.
Dance, monkey, dance!
Next.
Got any "lice," Michael?
Mr. Mosely.
Excuse me.
You can't just come in here...
You need to stop
what you're doing right now.
I'm performing a routine lice check.
There's a city ordinance
against ID'ing zombies, ma'am.
If there's nothing wrong with
being a zombie, why hide it?
Because of ignorant people like you.
- Ames.
- That's enough.
Why should our babies be forced
to share a classroom with
things that want to eat them?
We don't put them in classes
with grizzly bears.
Now that you mention it, lady,
some of your offspring do look tasty.
Gibbs, wanna grab some lunch?
Ames!
You're animals!
Hey, back off!
Gibbs, wanna grab some lunch?
Ames!
You're animals!
Back off!
You, stop!
Hey! Come back!
Well?
They drew their guns to
break up a routine lice check?
Like the lice checks
we have every semester.
If they had SARS, we'd quarantine them.
That's what Dolly Durkins says.
- If who had what?
- Karen, I've got this.
Ms. Charles...
We can't create an environment
conducive to learning
when an occupying army points their
automatic weapons at our students.
I will get to the bottom of this.
My son doesn't want to go to
school anymore, Ms. Charles.
I know these are trying times but...
Whatever you could do...
Forensics found cyanide in a tub of
protein powder found in Nancy's kitchen.
So she was the target.
Happy surprise.
This floor is made for batucadas.
Actually, it was made for draining
blood and embalming fluid,
but that twisty, spinning bit
was delightful.
So, I have an amazing idea that will
solve all your problems, ready?
Under cover dance partners, what!
How much fun would that be while
being important and helpful?
I interviewed half the dance show
contestants at the scene already.
- So?
- So, my cover is blown.
I just thought it was something
we could do together.
We haven't interviewed anyone.
Wait, um, what's happening?
So, the other contestants are
your prime suspects, right?
How helpful would it be to
have two people on the inside,
sizing them up, hearing the gossip,
shaking out the details
no one gives to cops.
You're famous now, Liv. People
will recognize you as Renegade.
I will wear a wig.
It will be fine. I will be with Ravi.
What? About that.
I can't ballroom dance.
I mean, I can freestyle dance
a bit, but not very well.
You don't even have to dance.
You just have to pretend
to be a dancer,
which everyone will totally buy
because of your dancer
physique and natural grace.
Oh!
I have been referred to as "lithe."
Wait, are you on board with this?
Yay, oh, my God!
How excited are we right now?
I'm gonna go pick up our dance gear.
We should probably
coordinate rehearsal outfits.
We're gonna have so much fun
while solving crime together!
Oh.
"Can't decide what color we look
best in." Confused face emoji.
"Can you come shopping with
me?" Praying hands emoji.
_
Detective Babineaux has
briefed me about everything.
So...
I will introduce you as "Jake
Steele" and "Juliette Valentine."
But FYI, we're gonna call each
other "Fred" and "Ginger"
as, like, nicknames.
I really think that's
overcomplicating things.
No, the Fred and Ginger is just for us.
Just our cute, little inside thing.
- But it...
- Oh.
Eyelash. Make a wish.
Did you wish for
what I think you wished for?
- Probably not.
- Wait, what did you wish for?
Again, just for clarity...
I most certainly will not
be dancing, right?
So, where
would you like to start?
Well, with Nancy and Gulliver...
Who's most likely to win this thing?
That's the pair
that would benefit most.
Definitely Lars and Tina.
They're just finishing up now.
You can pretend you're using
the studio after them.
Come on.
Seriously.
Do I really not know
what you wished for?
I'm gonna guess the Paso Doble.
The long and lean's
always think they're matadors.
There's no way you guys are
doing the Viennese waltz.
Right you are.
I'd like to introduce you
to our new contestants.
This is Jake and Juliette.
And let them spy on half our routine?
Thanks, Miss Everly.
Ready to shoe up, Fred?
I thought you said your name was Jake.
It is.
Sorry. "Fred" is like an inside joke.
Fred and Ginger.
It's, like, our little thing.
Like Fred Astaire
and Ginger Rogers.
Because you're dancers.
Kinda. It's a much longer
story than that.
It's like this whole thing
that we have.
I think that it's only fair that
we see some of your routine
as you saw half of ours.
You can't!
Sorry.
Remember not to overdo it, Ginger.
I have a, uh, bit of an injury.
So, I'm guessing, because of
the height difference,
you do a lot of lifts.
We don't usually do lifts
unless we're competing.
We try to wow them with floor work.
Oh, Tina made her steps for the day!
She's addicted to that tracker.
There's even a little map that shows you
where you walked throughout the day.
Lars!
Are you thinking what I am thinking?
Are you
thinking about searing groin pain?
Clive said the cyanide was found in
the protein powder at Nancy's house,
that means the killer
went to Nancy's house.
We need to get Tina's phone
and check her map.
Yeah. I might be done for the day.
We'll leave you to it.
But we should hang out.
You wanna do drinks and tapas later?
- Sure.
- The Lazy Squid. Nine o'clock.
Great.
We are so good at this.
I know. How do we not
have a secret high five?
We exchanged pleasantries
but we weren't like,
friends with them or anything.
- They were kind of...
- Up each other's asses.
Yeah.
Possibly two of the most
co-dependent people I've ever met.
Makes sense
that they died together.
They did everything else together.
Water polo was literally the only
thing that Gulliver did without her.
And I heard Nancy made him give it up
because it was taking up
too much emotional space.
Co-dependent, you say.
It doesn't matter whose fault it is.
It matters that the backup
generators don't work.
Sorry, sir.
I asked her to wait.
My patience expired after my
third unreturned phone call.
Stuart, I have to call you back.
We were supposed to help
each other, Major.
I keep the frightened humans
from freaking out.
You get your men to behave themselves.
- That was the deal, right?
- It was.
It was, but you didn't need
to come all the way down here
to apologize for failing to
keep your end of the bargain.
Excuse me?
I assume we both agree that
parents of seventh graders
might be forgiven for losing it when
soldiers point M16s at their kids.
- That's what you heard, huh?
- Yeah, I heard it,
I saw the movie. It had
some great dialogue in it.
Solider number one,
"These kids look yummy."
One of my soldiers said
the kids look yummy?
Delicious, tasty. Yes.
Something like that.
- And you've seen this?
- Yes.
One of the kids recorded it
on their camera phone.
Here. I'll send it to you now.
Enjoy the show.
You know, I'm keeping
my end of our bargain.
If you're too overwhelmed
to return a phone call,
maybe you're a little
out of your depth.
Hey, Peyton!
You know why that squad was there?
The school was doing a lice check.
They do lice checks
to identify zombie children.
Then, they lock them up away from
the other kids like they're lepers.
They didn't need to pull their guns.
They leveled their weapons
when one of those kids
tried to grab one of my men's sidearms.
The video doesn't show that.
Maybe you can take my word on it.
The most important
thing to remember
is that the birth of a child
is a sacred experience.
Really? You need to
write down "sacred"?
She just
said it was important.
Questions?
- Yes.
- No.
In case of a breech birth...
I'm gonna stop you there.
As a birth partner,
your main job is to surround
mom with light and love.
Light and love. Got it.
Okay, let's start
with some breathing exercises.
In through the nose...
Out through the mouth.
Breathe in the love...
And breathing out peace.
Sorry I'm late.
Breathing in love
and breathing out peace.
Clive, honey?
Breathe out peace.
_
***
- Spend some time on the shoulders...
- Babe?
Are you sanding me?
I'm sorry.
Okay. Thank you, everybody. Great work.
We should probably say hello.
I guess. It's only polite.
It would be helpful if you found a
birthing partner before next class.
I help out the single moms when I
can but it makes teaching harder.
- Got it. Thanks.
- Okay.
I'd say "small world"
but it's a walled-in city.
So...
I was, uh...
Well, uh. Yeah, so...
Small world indeed.
- You look beautiful.
- Thank you. You too.
Just three more months to go. You?
About the same.
Cool. cool.
That's cool.
Really cool.
Yeah. I'm kinda late
for something. So I should...
Of course. Yes. Good to see you.
Bye.
Okay.
So, I take it from the banquet
of nervous facial expressions
that I was just treated to, that you
did in fact sleep with Michelle
before we got back together.
Yeah.
- So there's a chance.
- I guess.
I mean, I haven't seen or spoken to her
since she transferred over to Vice.
It was one time. It happened once.
And then, the next day, Cavanaugh told
me the reason you broke up with me,
and I ended things.
So, you slept with her, then
broke up with her the next day,
and asked me to marry you?
Yeah.
It sounds a lot faster
when you say it like that.
You mean, when I say it in the
order in which it happened?
Babe, I'm really trying to do
light, love and calm right now.
You need to talk to her.
And get some answers.
I started out in musical theater,
did a bit of company work, and
then just commercial stuff.
What about you, Jake?
Any formal training?
- Hmm?
- Any formal training?
Oh. Yeah. I, um...
studied ballet as a child.
It's strange how it happened
actually. Small town boy.
A coal-mining family. My dad was
this tough-as-nails widower
who wanted me to take boxing classes,
but I stumbled into a ballet class
at the gym and I was hooked.
- Wow. Great story.
- Mmm-hmm.
Right? He's just
basically Billy Elliot.
So, uh, why do you want out of Seattle?
I have an offer to tour with Cardi B.
- You're a singer, too?
- As one of her dancers.
What about you, Lars?
I'm trying to get back to Madison
to see my mom before she dies.
What about you two?
- Oh, uh...
- I mean...
Well, honestly,
I just want to dance on TV.
- They have dancing here?
- Yeah, it's a hidden gem.
We came here on our first date.
It's a special place for us.
What? How is that...
There were tables there.
How can there be dancing?
It's called "The Lazy Squid."
I love this song. You have
to come dance with me.
Oh, I... Remember how I pulled
something during rehearsal?
Yeah, well, just keep me company.
You want me to keep you
company on the dance floor?
Yeah.
You promised I wouldn't have to dance.
I will dance for both of us.
You just bring the smolder.
Look at him.
I know.
He refuses to give anything away.
Liv, Tina left her phone
on the table. Let's go!
The song isn't over yet.
Can you focus, please?
I am focused.
I just don't understand why
you can't spend five minutes
with me without also trying
to solve a murder!
Liv!
You know how we finish...
- each other's sentences?
- Yes!
- And sometimes can even read each other's...
- Texts!
Minds!
So what am I thinking right now?
You want to...
Get the phone, solve the case, and
eventually become dance partners.
Close enough.
I was just thinking...
The show is gonna move us
all into a hotel soon.
We should be roomies.
That sounds amazing.
Guess that means
you're stuck with me, bud.
Spy much?
Better him than Trip.
That psycho freak of nature.
If Tina finds out, she will club me
to death behind the dance studio.
Hey, are you okay?
I think the drink just went to my head.
I need to use the ladies' room.
Can you come with?
I had a vision.
I think maybe I should switch brains.
Please, God, yes!
Gulliver and Lars
were having an affair.
Gulliver said if Tina found out,
she would beat him to death.
Oh, I believe she would.
But the cyanide was found in the
protein powder at Nancy's house.
If I'm on Gulliver's brain,
maybe I'll see Tina
confront Lars and Gulliver.
Still, why would the killer...
It's a hunch, Ravi!
I thought if anyone would
believe in me, it would be you.
New brain it is.
So, if Tina's our likely killer,
once you're roommates, you'll
have easy access to her phone,
and the best part... no dancing!
I thought the best part
was us spending time together.
Perfect timing, I got another round.
I just texted Miss Everly.
She said it's cool if we share a room.
We're good to go, too.
Amazing. When do we start
rooming together?
Right after dress rehearsal.
_
Oh, hey.
Hi, I was just dropping off the case
files from the Leski investigation.
The Leski investigation
that closed over a year ago?
- Mmm-hmm.
- We've been looking for those.
Is the baby mine?
You know, it's every girl's dream
to have a terrified guy ask her that.
- Sorry.
- The truth is...
I don't know.
After you ended things, I may
have been a little reactive,
made a couple of bad choices, my
ex-boyfriend Shane being one of them.
He's out of the picture like
Cleveland out-of-the-picture,
and I'm not sure which one
of you is the father.
Not sure it even matters.
It matters to me.
How would you feel about
getting a DNA test?
No.
Sorry. Those add unnecessary
risks to the pregnancy.
Yeah, of course.
Look...
I know having this
hanging out there isn't great.
You'll know when I know. I promise.
No.
No, no, no.
I cannot think of what to make.
I kind of want sweet.
There's no way I can learn
Gulliver and Nancy's routine.
I probably already know it, right?
Do you remember if I like
lemon meringue pie?
I have needs, too, you know.
I-I can't just give,
and give, and give!
A blintz?
Oh, my God. I love you,
that is exactly what I want!
Go, cat, go!
- Tell me you solved the case.
- Not yet.
I'm looking into this freak of
nature ex from Liv's vision.
In the meantime,
Tina's phone would be helpful.
There is no way I can do this.
I don't have the time,
I don't have the skill.
You don't need skills or time.
You're Ravi Chakrabarti
and you're amazing.
I brought you your dancing shoes,
more comfortable pants...
I can't kick in these...
Which is why I also brought these.
A bit of protein plus some caffeine.
Here's a reason not to freak out.
In salsa dancing,
the woman is the picture,
and the guy is the frame.
You just have to be the frame.
The frame.
And front and together.
Back and together.
Front and together. Back and together.
I'm a really bad frame.
You know, it might be easier
if he counts.
It's one, two, three, five, six, seven.
In salsa, you hold the four and eight.
- What do you mean, "hold them"?
- It's more like you drop them.
I don't know what either of those mean.
Ravi, just watch for a minute.
This might be weird but I think
Clive just got me pregnant.
Let's not joke about that right now.
Okay.
And... One, two, three.
Five, six, seven.
One, two, three.
Five, six, seven.
Forward and close. Back and close.
Forward and close.
The music goes in through your
ears and out through your hips.
Is this really the best use of my time?
Yes!
Yes!
Hey.
Just wondering if you had any
new information on my John Doe.
Yeah.
He was murdered.
Broken blood vessels in the eyes,
crushed windpipe would suggest
strangulation by someone very strong.
With large hands.
Cool.
Thanks.
- I did the lift!
- You did the lift!
Where are you off to?
Mike Lice-an.
Special Zed.
I see dead people.
Ma'am, any assignments were made
for purely academic reasons.
Well, I've spoken to the parents
of the kids who you re-assigned.
Solid C students who are suddenly
in the gifted and talented program.
No, your lice checks are really a
method by which you screen for
and then segregate zombie students.
That's illegal in Seattle.
Which you know.
So, if you're interested
in keeping your job,
you'll put those students back in their
original classrooms by
the end of the hour...
Leave me alone or I'll
kill you, you hear me?
Humans are the real monsters!
All of you!
_
You understand this office is still
limited to the contact the law?
Yeah, well, I'd like to ride a
lollipop horse down gumdrop mountain,
but I keep those
expectations to myself.
The difference between us is
that I'm actually representing
the rights of every citizen
in this city.
I don't know why you guys
aren't happier.
It's super fun in here.
You're Major Lillywhite.
- I am.
- I wanna join Fillmore Graves.
Oh.
You're a little young.
Maybe wait a couple of years.
- I don't want to wait.
- Why's that?
I wanna start killing humans now.
You do that. Looking forward to it.
- Major.
- Yeah.
Thanks for coming over.
I was planning on dropping by anyway.
I didn't like how we left things.
Yeah, me either.
I've got so much crap
raining down on me.
I may have let myself think
that I was the only one in
Seattle who had a tough job.
I'm sorry about that.
I'm sorry, too.
And you were right
about my constituency.
They are bald-faced liars.
Their lice check was a zombie check.
I went down to the school to
tear the principal a new one.
Hell, yeah.
I witnessed a fight,
and this young man here
got into it pretty bad
with a human student.
Raged out. That's why I wanted
you to come over here.
- I'm not sure what I can...
- They're orphaned.
Peyton, I can't...
Their sister was the Fillmore
Graves soldier who was killed.
They said you knew her but I
didn't know if that was...
Hi.
That means you're Michael.
And you're Jalen.
I knew Jordan very well.
She was special to me.
She talked about you guys all the time.
I am so sorry for your loss.
Yeah.
So are we.
There's a youth shelter
that takes zombies.
No, that's no good.
Agreed.
They need someplace safe, preferably
a loving and nurturing environment.
Any ideas?
Everyone loved Gulliver.
There's not a ton of water
polo players left in Seattle.
Losing him was a blow
on a lot of levels.
Was there anyone on the team
named "Trip"?
It could've been a nickname maybe?
"Trip"? No.
Was there anything strange
about any other players?
Something that might make people
think of them as a freak of nature?
I heard one of the guys
can milk himself.
I'm not sure which one. I have
a team photo with the roster.
What about this Sasquatch guy?
Hmm. Maybe.
Trip. Number three. This guy.
- Was he a freak in some way?
- Harris?
He can hold his breath forever.
You mind emailing me that photo?
Yeah.
How you feeling?
Did you ask her again?
- I'm sorry, I can't do it.
- Fine.
I'll do it.
Dale, we're asking her to get the test
because we're hoping
the baby isn't mine.
I think that just doesn't feel right.
We're surrounded by people who are
so excited that we're having a baby.
She's got no one.
I'm doing my best here, Clive.
I know.
You are the prettiest one here.
Oh. My. God.
I know. They're the worst of the bunch.
I don't even know how they got in.
I need to go to the ladies' room.
Can you not leave me. Please?
Hey, I know you're freaking out
but remember, we don't have to win.
We just have to look competent.
Do you think I'm worried
about not winning?
Ravi, this is your moment.
It's gonna be just like
in the movies except better.
Because you're not dancing
to win child support money,
or because your friend
is throwing an outlaw prom.
And you're not dancing to say,
"Hey, Dad! I'm a woman now."
I'm sick of this repressive
1960s paternalism!"
You are dancing for justice.
Next, we have
Jake and Juliette.
Hey, look at me.
Nobody puts Ravi in a corner.
Let the music take control.
Let the rhythm move you.
Are you really quoting
C+C Music Factory right now?
Don't leave me. She doesn't
care about your happiness.
She only cares about her own.
She'll ruin your life!
Thank you,
Jake and Juliette.
I saw a guy. Had to be a boyfriend.
He was saying that Nancy
would ruin Gulliver's life.
He was desperate.
Here's Gulliver's water polo team.
I thought it could be this
freak of nature tall guy or...
Look how hairy that guy is.
That's the guy!
- What? That one?
- Yeah.
How is he a freak of nature?
Third nipple.
Triple nipple. "Trip."
You see how amazing you are?
I thought it was a mole.
_
Renaldo Sulvain?
We were hoping to talk to you about
Gulliver Marlowe and Nancy Duvall.
Of course.
Please, come in.
Can I get you anything to drink?
We're okay. Thank you.
Can you tell us about your
relationship with Gulliver?
He was amazing.
Right up until that
possessive bitch broke us up.
- Nancy, you mean?
- She didn't care about him.
I thought he'd eventually see the way
she was taking advantage of him,
and he'd come back to me.
But he never did.
I never meant to hurt Gulliver.
I just wanted Nancy out of the way.
She was awful.
Oh, my God!
I'm calling it in!
Renaldo! Renaldo!
We need an ambulance right away
- at 2242 Wilcher Place.
- What did you take?
Adult male. No, Wilcher.
W-I-L-C-H-E-R!
Clive...
Cyanide. There was nothing
you could have done.
I was on my way home from an
event when I got the call.
And you didn't change before you
left the dance studio because...
I stayed to watch the other dancers.
As one does.
Oh, man, I'm so late. I gotta go.
- You good?
- Yeah.
Did we win?
Today, I'd like to talk
about how to support your partner
when things get a bit scary.
On your own again, huh?
Yep.
You should really settle
on a birthing partner.
You think I have a menu of options,
I just haven't selected one yet?
Michelle.
Let's... You and me.
The birthing partner I found on
Snapchat got stuck at work late, so...
Great. Okay, moms...
Birthing partners are behind you
supporting you as you
lean on the ball...
Dad or mom? Your call.
You should be dad.
You're being a very good source
of light and love right now.
Okay, let's do
some deep belly breathing.
I'll never forget
Baron's first words to me.
"Go back to college, white boy."
"This work is for real men."
Once you got to
know him, you realized...
This guy's a marshmallow.
Like this one time, he insisted on
taking us shopping for a first date.
We went downtown and all he
picked up was a black beanie.
Hey.
Sorry for the surprise visit.
Something came up.
I see that.
Hey, Liv.
Michael, Jalen...
Why don't you guys go and take
a seat by the other kids?
Who are they?
Orphan zombies.
Their sister was in my squad.
And she can't care for them?
She was killed by a sniper.
Oh, well. We have plenty
of room upstairs.
This place has sort of become
an accidental orphanage.
No, no, Liv. We weren't trying
to put this on you.
We were just looking for advice.
My advice is leave them with me.
So who died?
This guy, Baron.
He was the coyote that brought us here.
He died saving our lives.
We saw him take
five bullets to the chest.
That shouldn't kill him.
It kills most humans.
He was a human?
Yeah.
All coyotes are human.
Meet your girlfriend somewhere you're
not rubbing Dale's nose in it.
I understand why you broke
up with me. I love you for it.
Clive. How would you
like to be a father?
- Where's Baron?
- He's gone.
When I found Jordan, she
was digging brain tubes
out of bus station garbage cans.
Take cover!
Look out!
She died saving your sergeant.
if humans decide we only
have zombie interests at heart,
this city will collapse.
_
I was talking to my
therapist about the last
time you went to lunch
with your mother.
And he thinks she has borderline
personality disorder.
- Right? She's the worst.
- Mmm-hmm.
So, can you come with us
to lunch tomorrow?
I'll cancel my chiro appointment.
Oh. My. God. You're totally saving me.
I kinda wanna do
that solo part more with you.
I know I should be the focus but I still
think you need to be a part of it.
Pretty. Your solo turn shimmy
is what's gonna win it for us,
you gorgeous talent machine.
Ugh. This new protein powder
is disgusting. Taste it.
- Ugh.
- I have to go rinse my mouth.
You know, for that solo, if you want,
I could be on my knees
behind you leading your hips.
The most important thing
is that you feel good.
Pretty!
G!
Pretty!
_
I've been saving this up
for a while, so...
♪ That girl was poisoned ♪
As was that guy, with cyanide.
It's very sad.
Cyanide acts fast. Would've
killed them in under a minute.
They were healthy otherwise.
Quite fit actually.
Gulliver Marlowe and Nancy
Duvall were dance partners.
They were about to compete for a spot
on the show Dance of a Lifetime.
The prize? Two tickets out of Seattle.
Ooh, high stakes.
And according to the woman who runs the
dance studio where they all practiced,
Nancy and Gulliver
were the team to beat.
With five remaining couples
in the competition,
there are at least ten people with strong
motives for wanting these two dead.
So, which brain do I eat?
Eenie meenie minie mo? I can
blindfold you and spin you around.
Call it.
Uh, heads, Gulliver. Tails, Nancy.
Luck be a lady.
Dance, monkey, dance!
Next.
Got any "lice," Michael?
Mr. Mosely.
Excuse me.
You can't just come in here...
You need to stop
what you're doing right now.
I'm performing a routine lice check.
There's a city ordinance
against ID'ing zombies, ma'am.
If there's nothing wrong with
being a zombie, why hide it?
Because of ignorant people like you.
- Ames.
- That's enough.
Why should our babies be forced
to share a classroom with
things that want to eat them?
We don't put them in classes
with grizzly bears.
Now that you mention it, lady,
some of your offspring do look tasty.
Gibbs, wanna grab some lunch?
Ames!
You're animals!
Hey, back off!
Gibbs, wanna grab some lunch?
Ames!
You're animals!
Back off!
You, stop!
Hey! Come back!
Well?
They drew their guns to
break up a routine lice check?
Like the lice checks
we have every semester.
If they had SARS, we'd quarantine them.
That's what Dolly Durkins says.
- If who had what?
- Karen, I've got this.
Ms. Charles...
We can't create an environment
conducive to learning
when an occupying army points their
automatic weapons at our students.
I will get to the bottom of this.
My son doesn't want to go to
school anymore, Ms. Charles.
I know these are trying times but...
Whatever you could do...
Forensics found cyanide in a tub of
protein powder found in Nancy's kitchen.
So she was the target.
Happy surprise.
This floor is made for batucadas.
Actually, it was made for draining
blood and embalming fluid,
but that twisty, spinning bit
was delightful.
So, I have an amazing idea that will
solve all your problems, ready?
Under cover dance partners, what!
How much fun would that be while
being important and helpful?
I interviewed half the dance show
contestants at the scene already.
- So?
- So, my cover is blown.
I just thought it was something
we could do together.
We haven't interviewed anyone.
Wait, um, what's happening?
So, the other contestants are
your prime suspects, right?
How helpful would it be to
have two people on the inside,
sizing them up, hearing the gossip,
shaking out the details
no one gives to cops.
You're famous now, Liv. People
will recognize you as Renegade.
I will wear a wig.
It will be fine. I will be with Ravi.
What? About that.
I can't ballroom dance.
I mean, I can freestyle dance
a bit, but not very well.
You don't even have to dance.
You just have to pretend
to be a dancer,
which everyone will totally buy
because of your dancer
physique and natural grace.
Oh!
I have been referred to as "lithe."
Wait, are you on board with this?
Yay, oh, my God!
How excited are we right now?
I'm gonna go pick up our dance gear.
We should probably
coordinate rehearsal outfits.
We're gonna have so much fun
while solving crime together!
Oh.
"Can't decide what color we look
best in." Confused face emoji.
"Can you come shopping with
me?" Praying hands emoji.
_
Detective Babineaux has
briefed me about everything.
So...
I will introduce you as "Jake
Steele" and "Juliette Valentine."
But FYI, we're gonna call each
other "Fred" and "Ginger"
as, like, nicknames.
I really think that's
overcomplicating things.
No, the Fred and Ginger is just for us.
Just our cute, little inside thing.
- But it...
- Oh.
Eyelash. Make a wish.
Did you wish for
what I think you wished for?
- Probably not.
- Wait, what did you wish for?
Again, just for clarity...
I most certainly will not
be dancing, right?
So, where
would you like to start?
Well, with Nancy and Gulliver...
Who's most likely to win this thing?
That's the pair
that would benefit most.
Definitely Lars and Tina.
They're just finishing up now.
You can pretend you're using
the studio after them.
Come on.
Seriously.
Do I really not know
what you wished for?
I'm gonna guess the Paso Doble.
The long and lean's
always think they're matadors.
There's no way you guys are
doing the Viennese waltz.
Right you are.
I'd like to introduce you
to our new contestants.
This is Jake and Juliette.
And let them spy on half our routine?
Thanks, Miss Everly.
Ready to shoe up, Fred?
I thought you said your name was Jake.
It is.
Sorry. "Fred" is like an inside joke.
Fred and Ginger.
It's, like, our little thing.
Like Fred Astaire
and Ginger Rogers.
Because you're dancers.
Kinda. It's a much longer
story than that.
It's like this whole thing
that we have.
I think that it's only fair that
we see some of your routine
as you saw half of ours.
You can't!
Sorry.
Remember not to overdo it, Ginger.
I have a, uh, bit of an injury.
So, I'm guessing, because of
the height difference,
you do a lot of lifts.
We don't usually do lifts
unless we're competing.
We try to wow them with floor work.
Oh, Tina made her steps for the day!
She's addicted to that tracker.
There's even a little map that shows you
where you walked throughout the day.
Lars!
Are you thinking what I am thinking?
Are you
thinking about searing groin pain?
Clive said the cyanide was found in
the protein powder at Nancy's house,
that means the killer
went to Nancy's house.
We need to get Tina's phone
and check her map.
Yeah. I might be done for the day.
We'll leave you to it.
But we should hang out.
You wanna do drinks and tapas later?
- Sure.
- The Lazy Squid. Nine o'clock.
Great.
We are so good at this.
I know. How do we not
have a secret high five?
We exchanged pleasantries
but we weren't like,
friends with them or anything.
- They were kind of...
- Up each other's asses.
Yeah.
Possibly two of the most
co-dependent people I've ever met.
Makes sense
that they died together.
They did everything else together.
Water polo was literally the only
thing that Gulliver did without her.
And I heard Nancy made him give it up
because it was taking up
too much emotional space.
Co-dependent, you say.
It doesn't matter whose fault it is.
It matters that the backup
generators don't work.
Sorry, sir.
I asked her to wait.
My patience expired after my
third unreturned phone call.
Stuart, I have to call you back.
We were supposed to help
each other, Major.
I keep the frightened humans
from freaking out.
You get your men to behave themselves.
- That was the deal, right?
- It was.
It was, but you didn't need
to come all the way down here
to apologize for failing to
keep your end of the bargain.
Excuse me?
I assume we both agree that
parents of seventh graders
might be forgiven for losing it when
soldiers point M16s at their kids.
- That's what you heard, huh?
- Yeah, I heard it,
I saw the movie. It had
some great dialogue in it.
Solider number one,
"These kids look yummy."
One of my soldiers said
the kids look yummy?
Delicious, tasty. Yes.
Something like that.
- And you've seen this?
- Yes.
One of the kids recorded it
on their camera phone.
Here. I'll send it to you now.
Enjoy the show.
You know, I'm keeping
my end of our bargain.
If you're too overwhelmed
to return a phone call,
maybe you're a little
out of your depth.
Hey, Peyton!
You know why that squad was there?
The school was doing a lice check.
They do lice checks
to identify zombie children.
Then, they lock them up away from
the other kids like they're lepers.
They didn't need to pull their guns.
They leveled their weapons
when one of those kids
tried to grab one of my men's sidearms.
The video doesn't show that.
Maybe you can take my word on it.
The most important
thing to remember
is that the birth of a child
is a sacred experience.
Really? You need to
write down "sacred"?
She just
said it was important.
Questions?
- Yes.
- No.
In case of a breech birth...
I'm gonna stop you there.
As a birth partner,
your main job is to surround
mom with light and love.
Light and love. Got it.
Okay, let's start
with some breathing exercises.
In through the nose...
Out through the mouth.
Breathe in the love...
And breathing out peace.
Sorry I'm late.
Breathing in love
and breathing out peace.
Clive, honey?
Breathe out peace.
_
***
- Spend some time on the shoulders...
- Babe?
Are you sanding me?
I'm sorry.
Okay. Thank you, everybody. Great work.
We should probably say hello.
I guess. It's only polite.
It would be helpful if you found a
birthing partner before next class.
I help out the single moms when I
can but it makes teaching harder.
- Got it. Thanks.
- Okay.
I'd say "small world"
but it's a walled-in city.
So...
I was, uh...
Well, uh. Yeah, so...
Small world indeed.
- You look beautiful.
- Thank you. You too.
Just three more months to go. You?
About the same.
Cool. cool.
That's cool.
Really cool.
Yeah. I'm kinda late
for something. So I should...
Of course. Yes. Good to see you.
Bye.
Okay.
So, I take it from the banquet
of nervous facial expressions
that I was just treated to, that you
did in fact sleep with Michelle
before we got back together.
Yeah.
- So there's a chance.
- I guess.
I mean, I haven't seen or spoken to her
since she transferred over to Vice.
It was one time. It happened once.
And then, the next day, Cavanaugh told
me the reason you broke up with me,
and I ended things.
So, you slept with her, then
broke up with her the next day,
and asked me to marry you?
Yeah.
It sounds a lot faster
when you say it like that.
You mean, when I say it in the
order in which it happened?
Babe, I'm really trying to do
light, love and calm right now.
You need to talk to her.
And get some answers.
I started out in musical theater,
did a bit of company work, and
then just commercial stuff.
What about you, Jake?
Any formal training?
- Hmm?
- Any formal training?
Oh. Yeah. I, um...
studied ballet as a child.
It's strange how it happened
actually. Small town boy.
A coal-mining family. My dad was
this tough-as-nails widower
who wanted me to take boxing classes,
but I stumbled into a ballet class
at the gym and I was hooked.
- Wow. Great story.
- Mmm-hmm.
Right? He's just
basically Billy Elliot.
So, uh, why do you want out of Seattle?
I have an offer to tour with Cardi B.
- You're a singer, too?
- As one of her dancers.
What about you, Lars?
I'm trying to get back to Madison
to see my mom before she dies.
What about you two?
- Oh, uh...
- I mean...
Well, honestly,
I just want to dance on TV.
- They have dancing here?
- Yeah, it's a hidden gem.
We came here on our first date.
It's a special place for us.
What? How is that...
There were tables there.
How can there be dancing?
It's called "The Lazy Squid."
I love this song. You have
to come dance with me.
Oh, I... Remember how I pulled
something during rehearsal?
Yeah, well, just keep me company.
You want me to keep you
company on the dance floor?
Yeah.
You promised I wouldn't have to dance.
I will dance for both of us.
You just bring the smolder.
Look at him.
I know.
He refuses to give anything away.
Liv, Tina left her phone
on the table. Let's go!
The song isn't over yet.
Can you focus, please?
I am focused.
I just don't understand why
you can't spend five minutes
with me without also trying
to solve a murder!
Liv!
You know how we finish...
- each other's sentences?
- Yes!
- And sometimes can even read each other's...
- Texts!
Minds!
So what am I thinking right now?
You want to...
Get the phone, solve the case, and
eventually become dance partners.
Close enough.
I was just thinking...
The show is gonna move us
all into a hotel soon.
We should be roomies.
That sounds amazing.
Guess that means
you're stuck with me, bud.
Spy much?
Better him than Trip.
That psycho freak of nature.
If Tina finds out, she will club me
to death behind the dance studio.
Hey, are you okay?
I think the drink just went to my head.
I need to use the ladies' room.
Can you come with?
I had a vision.
I think maybe I should switch brains.
Please, God, yes!
Gulliver and Lars
were having an affair.
Gulliver said if Tina found out,
she would beat him to death.
Oh, I believe she would.
But the cyanide was found in the
protein powder at Nancy's house.
If I'm on Gulliver's brain,
maybe I'll see Tina
confront Lars and Gulliver.
Still, why would the killer...
It's a hunch, Ravi!
I thought if anyone would
believe in me, it would be you.
New brain it is.
So, if Tina's our likely killer,
once you're roommates, you'll
have easy access to her phone,
and the best part... no dancing!
I thought the best part
was us spending time together.
Perfect timing, I got another round.
I just texted Miss Everly.
She said it's cool if we share a room.
We're good to go, too.
Amazing. When do we start
rooming together?
Right after dress rehearsal.
_
Oh, hey.
Hi, I was just dropping off the case
files from the Leski investigation.
The Leski investigation
that closed over a year ago?
- Mmm-hmm.
- We've been looking for those.
Is the baby mine?
You know, it's every girl's dream
to have a terrified guy ask her that.
- Sorry.
- The truth is...
I don't know.
After you ended things, I may
have been a little reactive,
made a couple of bad choices, my
ex-boyfriend Shane being one of them.
He's out of the picture like
Cleveland out-of-the-picture,
and I'm not sure which one
of you is the father.
Not sure it even matters.
It matters to me.
How would you feel about
getting a DNA test?
No.
Sorry. Those add unnecessary
risks to the pregnancy.
Yeah, of course.
Look...
I know having this
hanging out there isn't great.
You'll know when I know. I promise.
No.
No, no, no.
I cannot think of what to make.
I kind of want sweet.
There's no way I can learn
Gulliver and Nancy's routine.
I probably already know it, right?
Do you remember if I like
lemon meringue pie?
I have needs, too, you know.
I-I can't just give,
and give, and give!
A blintz?
Oh, my God. I love you,
that is exactly what I want!
Go, cat, go!
- Tell me you solved the case.
- Not yet.
I'm looking into this freak of
nature ex from Liv's vision.
In the meantime,
Tina's phone would be helpful.
There is no way I can do this.
I don't have the time,
I don't have the skill.
You don't need skills or time.
You're Ravi Chakrabarti
and you're amazing.
I brought you your dancing shoes,
more comfortable pants...
I can't kick in these...
Which is why I also brought these.
A bit of protein plus some caffeine.
Here's a reason not to freak out.
In salsa dancing,
the woman is the picture,
and the guy is the frame.
You just have to be the frame.
The frame.
And front and together.
Back and together.
Front and together. Back and together.
I'm a really bad frame.
You know, it might be easier
if he counts.
It's one, two, three, five, six, seven.
In salsa, you hold the four and eight.
- What do you mean, "hold them"?
- It's more like you drop them.
I don't know what either of those mean.
Ravi, just watch for a minute.
This might be weird but I think
Clive just got me pregnant.
Let's not joke about that right now.
Okay.
And... One, two, three.
Five, six, seven.
One, two, three.
Five, six, seven.
Forward and close. Back and close.
Forward and close.
The music goes in through your
ears and out through your hips.
Is this really the best use of my time?
Yes!
Yes!
Hey.
Just wondering if you had any
new information on my John Doe.
Yeah.
He was murdered.
Broken blood vessels in the eyes,
crushed windpipe would suggest
strangulation by someone very strong.
With large hands.
Cool.
Thanks.
- I did the lift!
- You did the lift!
Where are you off to?
Mike Lice-an.
Special Zed.
I see dead people.
Ma'am, any assignments were made
for purely academic reasons.
Well, I've spoken to the parents
of the kids who you re-assigned.
Solid C students who are suddenly
in the gifted and talented program.
No, your lice checks are really a
method by which you screen for
and then segregate zombie students.
That's illegal in Seattle.
Which you know.
So, if you're interested
in keeping your job,
you'll put those students back in their
original classrooms by
the end of the hour...
Leave me alone or I'll
kill you, you hear me?
Humans are the real monsters!
All of you!
_
You understand this office is still
limited to the contact the law?
Yeah, well, I'd like to ride a
lollipop horse down gumdrop mountain,
but I keep those
expectations to myself.
The difference between us is
that I'm actually representing
the rights of every citizen
in this city.
I don't know why you guys
aren't happier.
It's super fun in here.
You're Major Lillywhite.
- I am.
- I wanna join Fillmore Graves.
Oh.
You're a little young.
Maybe wait a couple of years.
- I don't want to wait.
- Why's that?
I wanna start killing humans now.
You do that. Looking forward to it.
- Major.
- Yeah.
Thanks for coming over.
I was planning on dropping by anyway.
I didn't like how we left things.
Yeah, me either.
I've got so much crap
raining down on me.
I may have let myself think
that I was the only one in
Seattle who had a tough job.
I'm sorry about that.
I'm sorry, too.
And you were right
about my constituency.
They are bald-faced liars.
Their lice check was a zombie check.
I went down to the school to
tear the principal a new one.
Hell, yeah.
I witnessed a fight,
and this young man here
got into it pretty bad
with a human student.
Raged out. That's why I wanted
you to come over here.
- I'm not sure what I can...
- They're orphaned.
Peyton, I can't...
Their sister was the Fillmore
Graves soldier who was killed.
They said you knew her but I
didn't know if that was...
Hi.
That means you're Michael.
And you're Jalen.
I knew Jordan very well.
She was special to me.
She talked about you guys all the time.
I am so sorry for your loss.
Yeah.
So are we.
There's a youth shelter
that takes zombies.
No, that's no good.
Agreed.
They need someplace safe, preferably
a loving and nurturing environment.
Any ideas?
Everyone loved Gulliver.
There's not a ton of water
polo players left in Seattle.
Losing him was a blow
on a lot of levels.
Was there anyone on the team
named "Trip"?
It could've been a nickname maybe?
"Trip"? No.
Was there anything strange
about any other players?
Something that might make people
think of them as a freak of nature?
I heard one of the guys
can milk himself.
I'm not sure which one. I have
a team photo with the roster.
What about this Sasquatch guy?
Hmm. Maybe.
Trip. Number three. This guy.
- Was he a freak in some way?
- Harris?
He can hold his breath forever.
You mind emailing me that photo?
Yeah.
How you feeling?
Did you ask her again?
- I'm sorry, I can't do it.
- Fine.
I'll do it.
Dale, we're asking her to get the test
because we're hoping
the baby isn't mine.
I think that just doesn't feel right.
We're surrounded by people who are
so excited that we're having a baby.
She's got no one.
I'm doing my best here, Clive.
I know.
You are the prettiest one here.
Oh. My. God.
I know. They're the worst of the bunch.
I don't even know how they got in.
I need to go to the ladies' room.
Can you not leave me. Please?
Hey, I know you're freaking out
but remember, we don't have to win.
We just have to look competent.
Do you think I'm worried
about not winning?
Ravi, this is your moment.
It's gonna be just like
in the movies except better.
Because you're not dancing
to win child support money,
or because your friend
is throwing an outlaw prom.
And you're not dancing to say,
"Hey, Dad! I'm a woman now."
I'm sick of this repressive
1960s paternalism!"
You are dancing for justice.
Next, we have
Jake and Juliette.
Hey, look at me.
Nobody puts Ravi in a corner.
Let the music take control.
Let the rhythm move you.
Are you really quoting
C+C Music Factory right now?
Don't leave me. She doesn't
care about your happiness.
She only cares about her own.
She'll ruin your life!
Thank you,
Jake and Juliette.
I saw a guy. Had to be a boyfriend.
He was saying that Nancy
would ruin Gulliver's life.
He was desperate.
Here's Gulliver's water polo team.
I thought it could be this
freak of nature tall guy or...
Look how hairy that guy is.
That's the guy!
- What? That one?
- Yeah.
How is he a freak of nature?
Third nipple.
Triple nipple. "Trip."
You see how amazing you are?
I thought it was a mole.
_
Renaldo Sulvain?
We were hoping to talk to you about
Gulliver Marlowe and Nancy Duvall.
Of course.
Please, come in.
Can I get you anything to drink?
We're okay. Thank you.
Can you tell us about your
relationship with Gulliver?
He was amazing.
Right up until that
possessive bitch broke us up.
- Nancy, you mean?
- She didn't care about him.
I thought he'd eventually see the way
she was taking advantage of him,
and he'd come back to me.
But he never did.
I never meant to hurt Gulliver.
I just wanted Nancy out of the way.
She was awful.
Oh, my God!
I'm calling it in!
Renaldo! Renaldo!
We need an ambulance right away
- at 2242 Wilcher Place.
- What did you take?
Adult male. No, Wilcher.
W-I-L-C-H-E-R!
Clive...
Cyanide. There was nothing
you could have done.
I was on my way home from an
event when I got the call.
And you didn't change before you
left the dance studio because...
I stayed to watch the other dancers.
As one does.
Oh, man, I'm so late. I gotta go.
- You good?
- Yeah.
Did we win?
Today, I'd like to talk
about how to support your partner
when things get a bit scary.
On your own again, huh?
Yep.
You should really settle
on a birthing partner.
You think I have a menu of options,
I just haven't selected one yet?
Michelle.
Let's... You and me.
The birthing partner I found on
Snapchat got stuck at work late, so...
Great. Okay, moms...
Birthing partners are behind you
supporting you as you
lean on the ball...
Dad or mom? Your call.
You should be dad.
You're being a very good source
of light and love right now.
Okay, let's do
some deep belly breathing.
I'll never forget
Baron's first words to me.
"Go back to college, white boy."
"This work is for real men."
Once you got to
know him, you realized...
This guy's a marshmallow.
Like this one time, he insisted on
taking us shopping for a first date.
We went downtown and all he
picked up was a black beanie.
Hey.
Sorry for the surprise visit.
Something came up.
I see that.
Hey, Liv.
Michael, Jalen...
Why don't you guys go and take
a seat by the other kids?
Who are they?
Orphan zombies.
Their sister was in my squad.
And she can't care for them?
She was killed by a sniper.
Oh, well. We have plenty
of room upstairs.
This place has sort of become
an accidental orphanage.
No, no, Liv. We weren't trying
to put this on you.
We were just looking for advice.
My advice is leave them with me.
So who died?
This guy, Baron.
He was the coyote that brought us here.
He died saving our lives.
We saw him take
five bullets to the chest.
That shouldn't kill him.
It kills most humans.
He was a human?
Yeah.
All coyotes are human.