iZombie (2015–…): Season 2, Episode 13 - The Whopper - full transcript

Liv investigates the murder of Big Fish, a pathological liar. After chewing down a brain burger, she see-saws between spouting truth and lies the whole episode.

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LIV: Previously, on iZombie...

DALE: This is our guy.
I think he's the Chaos Killer.

Blaine. This is the suspect
in the Meat Cute massacre.

We found him.

- So, we use FBI resources.
- Then we bust this SOB.

I'm reading the news

and then suddenly your scary
ass Pops is staring at me.

The Chaos Killer kidnapped the guy
just like our other customers.


We'll be taking that tainted Utopium
that we need to make the cure.

You said he knew
where to find it.

Old high school buddy of mine
was a drug dealer.



Him and this other dealer swallowed
a bunch of condoms full of Utopium.

So we have two bodies packed full of
tainted Utopium buried in a shallow grave.

RAVI: We've narrowed the location
to
a single 100-acre field.

MAN 1-. (ON RAND) Welcome to Boba
Chatt, the podcast of the Dark Side.


MAN 1: (ON RADIO) Kylo Ren. Emo brat,
or supreme badass? MAJOR: Ravi!

Ravi!

- Ravi!
- MAN 2: (ON RADIO) Kylo was the guy

who claims that Fall Out Boy
was more than music.


I'm more scared of Rick
Moranis as Dark Helmet


than Kylo Ren.

We did it!

Here he is! Huh?
Zombie cure, here we come!

It isn't one of our guys.

(SIGHS) Ours have been
dead for nearly two years.



This one's only
a couple of months gone.

Then who is this?

(THEME SONG PLAYING)

Geo-whatting?

Geocaching.

It's a real world outdoor
treasure hunting game.

Strangers leave caches,
post the GPS coordinates,

and then people like us
go out and find them.

That's what we were doing.

What sort of treasures?

Oh! Let's see.

Um, Matchbox cars,
sets of crayons.

Yeah. I found
a wheat penny once.

So treasures for children.

It's more about the joy
of discovery.

Why do men
climb mountains, Clive?

Because it tests their
endurance, their courage,

their sense of themselves
as men?

Oh, I'm sorry.
Were you drawing a comparison?

LIV: Clive?

The victim appears
to be in his 30s.

One gunshot wound
in his chest. One in his back.

No ID, but a coaster
with a phone number.

Maybe whoever's answered
this number can ID our vic.

Major, can I have a word?

What can I do for you,
Detective?

Some new evidence came to
light in the Meat Cute case,

and I wanted to ask you
a couple more questions.

What do you suppose
Clive is asking Major about?

Dunno.

He didn't buy
the geocaching story?

I thought he did,
but who knows?

You were arrested
for breaking into a man's car.

You said this man, Julien Dupont,
was in possession of a human brain.

This was the same man you later
claimed broke into your house.

Look, I said a lot of things,

and was urged to seek
medical treatment.

By you, if I recall.

Well, good news.

The doctors at the mental
institution were able to cure me.

Realized it was all
just in my head.

I had a vision
last night, Ravi.

Yeah?

You know some idiot is moving in on Mr.
Boss' drug trade?

That would explain the corner
boys ending up in our drawers

with pocketfuls of lucky U.

That idiot is Blaine.

Are you sure?

In my vision, Blaine's flunky,
Don E., was selling it.

These brains, man.

You handed me
a Holocaust survivor.

You want me to describe
some of my visions to you?

She was a classical violinist.

Go out
and impress some ladies.

Where's Natalie, man?

I'm a zombie. I'm not dead.

Natalie's not available.

Work it out, Blaine.

Or maybe the next story
I publish in the paper

you won't like as much
as the last one.

(PHONE BEEPS)

(CLICKS OFF PHONE)

It's gonna be gross, isn't it?

He has been dead
for a couple of months.

(SIGHS) But I don't even
know anyone who's died.

He had your phone number
written on a coaster.

I'm afraid
you're our only lead.

Okay.

Do it.

Oh!

Oh, this jackass.

You do know him?

Kind of. His name's Corey.

I hooked up with him
a couple months ago.

Dick never called me again.

Possibly because he was dead?

Yeah. You're right.
That's probably why.

'Cause I know
he had a good time.

You know
this Corey's last name?

Mmm-mmm.

He was just a guy I'd always
see at Possibilities.

- That's a bar?
- Yeah.

Did he work there?

No. He was an FBI agent.

He was in Seattle infiltrating
a gang of bank robbers.

- I'll run this by Bozzio.
-(CAMERA CLICKS)

If she bears your children, you'll
start using her first name, right?

Thank you for your help,
Miss Schafer.

I'll show you out.

Bye.

You realize this Corey's brain

could lead us to the
tainted Utopium?

How do you figure?

Well, it stands to reason
there aren't multiple killers

dumping bodies
in the same field.

So whoever executed
this FBI agent...

Probably also murdered the two
guys we've been digging for.

Find Corey's killer...

And maybe we can get him
to tell us where he buried

Drake's high school buddy
and his friend.

What better time
to be on FBI agent brain.

Would Bozzio even know if the
FBI sent an agent to Seattle

who was working
deep undercover?

She says if an agent had been missing
for a couple months, she would.

This Corey guy's not FBI.

(SIGHS) You know,
I used to bartend.

You never mentioned that.

Yeah.

At this island-themed place
called Jamaican Me Thirsty.

The bartenders were the show,
juggling bottles,

making drinks blindfolded,
dancing on the bar.

I was kind of a big deal.

Don't bother
looking for the place now.

Wasn't planning to.

Went under back in '09.

I invented the Orgasm, Clive.

Amaretto.

Irish Cream whiskey.
Coffee liqueur. That was me.

Seattle PD.

Do you recognize this man?

Give a girl a little warning.

Yeah, that's Big Fish.

Hasn't been around
in a while, though.

We were told
his name was Corey.

Yeah, Corey Carp.

But everyone
called him Big Fish.

Because he's a big guy
and his name is Carp?

(LAUGHS) No.

Because everything
out of his mouth was a lie.

Ah!

A fish story.

How'd he die?

He was murdered.

The woman
who identified his body

said she saw him here often.

Yeah. He worked
for the company

that rents us
all our arcade games.

He'd come in a couple nights a
week, collect all the quarters,

then he'd sit around and try
and chat up the ladies.

He'd sniff out
the drunkest girls

and tell them anything.

That he was
a 9/11 first responder,

or that he was drafted
by the Seahawks,

but blew out a knee
before he ever played a snap.

Or an FBI agent infiltrating
a gang of bank robbers.

BARTENDER: Yeah.

Stuff like that.

Too bad about Big Fish.
Nice guy.

Hey.

What's up?

“Pinball Vintage Amusements.
Pier 55. 8500 Alaskan Way."

You recognize that address?

Mr. Boss' warehouse.

Big Fish worked for Mr. Boss.

And now he's dead.

Still the insolent boy.

I blame my upbringing.

Clearly, I wasn't
beaten enough as a child.

It remains my greatest regret.

Really?

So you're over losing out
to Eva Braun, huh?

Why has my father's domestic help
joined us for the reading of his will?

It was a stipulation
he requested.

And it won't be a reading.

Not exactly.

Hmm.

To my dear friend,
Frieda Bade-r,


who has served me loyally
for 35 years, (SIGHS)


I leave $10 million
and the Lake Como estate.


And why not?

She only starved your son to
punish him for tracking in mud.

Gave away his dog when he was
caught shoplifting bubblegum.

And you still believe
that barking, shedding mutt

was given away.

You never wondered why the
rose bush in the south garden

grew so fast and full?

To my son, Blaine.

Blaine! Old man
Newcomb's on the phone.

Handle it.

Says it's urgent.

Fine. We'll handle it.

To my son, Blaine, I leave
the balance of my assets.

The houses in Seattle and
Maui, the cabin in Whistler,


the controlling shares
in Vantage Elite Properties.


In the following
circumstances, however,


this section of the will
becomes null.


If my death has resulted
from foul play,


then all of my assets will
be awarded to Frau Bader


and her descendants
should she not outlive me.


He can't do this.

A prescient man, your father.

He was murdered
by a serial killer!

Or anyone
with a can of spray paint.

Liquidate everything.

Deposit all funds
to this account.

I'm contesting this.

You're welcome to.

But I can assure you,
it's legally-binding.

Blaine, you need
to come down here, quick!

BLAINE: (ON INTERCOM)
Why's that, Don E?

We blew one of our breakers,
the fridge has been off

and I think
our brains went bad.

(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

♪ Happy birthday
to you, Blaine


♪ I think this gift
will make good...


It's not my birthday, Don E.

♪ ...brain ♪

Well, then maybe we should
return your present.

Old man Newcomb trapped him
in his panic room.

- It's the Chaos Killer.
- What?

He had spray paint cans
on him.

And this.

(LAUGHS)

We meet again, old friend.

(GRUNTS)

Ah! He's waking up.

Scott E?

Nope. I'm flattered, though.
That was one good-looking man.

Rise and shine, Major Bummer.

What do you think
of my latest business venture?

Your girlfriend gives it her
old zombie stamp of approval.

Liv doesn't...

No, she's totally down with me getting my brains
from people that don't need them anymore.

We're BFFs now.

Who else is gonna feed
Seattle's zombies?

At least until
you kill them all, right?

I'm not killing...

(SHUSHING)

The lying to save your
life section comes later.

So, you're the Chaos Killer.

Did you know that
those are my customers

you've been taking out?

My income stream?

I'm sure you did.

(SIGHS) Don E.

How soon
could you have a grave dug?

I have plans, actually.

A few hours.

Well, let's get 'er done.

Bad news, brother.

Today is the last day
of your life.

So you better get straight
with your God,

'cause here comes
the big one.

You comfy in there?

I ask, because it's where you're
going to be spending eternity.

But because
I'm a forgiving man,

I'm willing to let you decide
which way you go out.

There's quick and painless,

a bullet straight
to the heart.

I know, a head shot
would be quicker,

but that brain of yours
is gonna fetch a pretty penny.

Or (CLEARS THROAT),
we turn you into a zombie

and we bury you in this box,

where you will suffer forever

with an abiding
hunger for brains

that you will never sate.

Wait.
What do you want to know?

Well, it's obvious there's
a leak in my organization.

I mean, how else are you
finding my zombies?

Give me a name,
and we'll go the quick route.

Scout's honor.

Otherwise it is...
(IMITATES HACKSAW)

...express train
to Zombieland.

You're not a zombie,
all right?

So what do you plan
on doing with that finger?

Chief!

-(FOOTSTEPS APPROACH)
- So, you've got zombie-dar.

That explains so much.

Of course, you're not just
wandering around the streets

waiting for it to go...

...off.

(CHUCKLES)

(SNIFFS)

Do you believe me now? Hmm?

The part about me
turning you into a zombie?

I was given a list.

Three hundred names,
all suspected zombies,

all connoisseurs of fake tans,
hair dye and hot sauce.

My job was to figure out which ones
were zombies and which ones weren't,

and get rid of the ones
that are.

I was told
that if I didn't do it,

they would take out every
single person on the list,

and they would start with Liv.

Oh. Who's the "they"?

Let me know
who's making you do this.

No.

You must have a pair on you
the size of watermelons.

If I told you, you have no
reason to keep me alive.

And aren't you a little
bit interested to know

if you're on their list?

Maybe a few more
hours in the dark

will make that quick death
more appealing.

Close him up.
I'm not going to miss you.

This pathological liar brain
is gonna get me in trouble.

I can feel it.

RAVI: Not with me.

I'll know the truth
when I hear it.

Ahh!

I stand corrected.

- It's a bloodbath.
- Oh, damn it.

I was afraid of that.

What am I looking at, Ravi?

Matricide.

These six young zombie rats
are clones of New Hope.

The remains you see here are those of
the mother that gave birth to them.

Apparently, the little clones decided it was
time to switch from mother's milk to brains.

Why the clones?

When we find
the tainted Utopium,

I'd prefer to test on rats, normal
and zombie, rather than humans.

New Hope,
like Blaine and Major,

became a zombie
and was given the cure.

Her clone should give us
the most accurate picture

of what Blaine and Major
can expect.

I'd hate to lose
a perfectly good zombie rat.

Let's use Blaine
as our guinea pig.

You don't really mean that.

What does he need to do to prove
to you that he's the devil?

Put up a sign?

- He's mocking us.
- I really hate this guy.

I'm gonna keep up
surveillance on him,

but he knows we're out there.

He can pull that hearse
right up to their back door,

smuggle whatever he wants
in and out.

Could there be a better front
for a serial killer?

I mean, he can cremate bodies,
bury bodies.

LIV: Hey.

DALE: Hey, Liv. What's up?

Clive didn't tell you?

About my lottery ticket?

First I've heard of it.

I hit five out of six numbers, and
I only missed the sixth by one.

I was this close
to $40 million.

Five out of six numbers,

I think that still wins you 50
grand or something like that.

Oh shoot!

Why did I tear up my ticket?
I just was so mad.

Live and learn, I guess.

That's very Zen of you.

Well, back to the salt mines.

You texted?

Yeah.

It turns out Corey Carp's
$75,000 luxury sedan

has been in our impound lot
for the past couple of months.

How did he afford...

Guess what we found
in the trunk?

A goose that lays golden eggs?

Thirteen thousand quarters stashed
in his spare tire wheel well.

What if he was skimming
and Mr. Boss found out?

Well, that's one way to end up
buried in a shallow grave.

Leek, I know it's hard to feel bad for
someone that grew up with a nanny,

but I hope no one is picturing
Mary Poppins here.

(THUMPING)

Should we see what he wants?

I sure don't want my hole
to go to waste.

Yeah, Chief,
"That's what she said.“

Don't bother.

(GRUNTS)

So?

Your customers aren't dead.

I can bring them back to you.
Eventually.

They're not dead?

Hey, Blaine!
You can get your dad back!

How badly do you want
to see your dad again?

My handlers don't care
which zombie I take out next

as long as I make my way
steadily down my list.

And they have you freeze them?

- They think I'm killing them.
- Killing sounds easier.

Yeah, except I'm
not a murderer.

I bet you tell that
to all the families

grieving for their loved ones.

(MAKES POPPING SOUND)

So, how did they find you?

Help wanted ad?
“Zombie killer needed.“

They knew Liv was a zombie. So they
bugged her phone and learned stuff.

So who would want zombies gone,
but want it done quietly?

I'll figure it out.

In the meantime,
I'm gonna need my dad back.

God, do I miss that man.

(WHIMPERING)

Nope. Can't do it. You need
me to show you a photo or...

No, I have no doubt
which one is your dad.

Imperious, fancy dresser,
owns a bust of himself.

That's the guy!

And from here on, I tell you
which zombies you take out.

I think we could solve a few
of each other's problems.

There's someone out there.

Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.

Hey. Hey. Hey.

It's the FBI, man.
They've got a crush on me.

They've got it in their head
that I'm the Chaos Killer.

You're gonna have to leave here the
same way you came in, back of a hearse.

Chief will take you.

MAJOR: All right.

Uh, Major.

Yeah?

I know where you live.

I know where Liv, um, lives.

Give me my dad or things
are gonna get ugly fast, okay?

How can you not see it?

Sorry, mate.
Not sure I follow.

She takes on
certain personality traits

of the victims
we're investigating.

Now, I do my best
to roll with it,

figure it helps her get in
tune, psychically-speaking.

If you say so, um...

Right now, for instance, the guy we're
investigating is a pathological liar.

- She...
- LIV: Lunch is here!

Finally. Did you get lost?

I would've been back sooner,

but the guy in front of me in
line had a mild heart attack.

I had to administer CPR,
wait for paramedics...

He'll survive, but your
kung pao chicken may be cold.

Then it would be small of me
to complain.

Ballistics came back.

The gun found
buried with Big Fish

matches an unsolved murder
from last year.

Popeye Collier. Dock worker.

He witnessed
a Utopium shipment

arrive from Hong Kong,

was gonna testify against the men from Mr.
Boss' crew he saw unloading it.

He was killed in his home.

Looked like
a professional hit.

That's Terrell Johnson.

Captured at the murder scene,
covered in Collier's blood.

Ex-con.

No weapon was found though,

and there was no gunshot
residue on Terrell's hands.

I talked to Lieutenant Devore who handled
the Collier case back when she was in Vice.

She said they were sure Johnson was the
killer, just couldn't make it stick.

Terrell Johnson could be
a hitman working for Boss.

If he's taken out
two of Boss' enemies,

he's probably taken out
a lot more.

Devore said Terrell disappeared
without a trace after the trial,

but... I've tracked him down.

CLIVE: Terrell Johnson?
Seattle PD, we'd like to talk.

Has this seemed
like the longest day?

What do you want?

You know this man?

Name's Corey Carp.
Goes by "Big Fish.“

No. Why?

He was murdered.

(CHUCKLES)

The same gun that was used
as the Popeye Collier murder.

You want to talk to me, I'm gonna
be needing a lawyer present.

(SNICKERS)

-(SIGHS) Any visions?
- No. But he sure felt like our guy.

I'm not disputing that Bonnie and
Clyde are like family to you,

but the IRS doesn't allow you to
claim pit bulls as dependents.

But I'm their sole provider.

I know, but I always
advise my clients

to stay on the
right side of the law.

MAN: Hey, Boss.

Our friend in the SPD
just called.

Detectives working the Big Fish
case like Terrell Johnson for it.

They tracked the guy down.

They do, huh?

Want me to handle it?

Where's Drake?

You feel that?

It's a tumor.

(IN MOCK ACCENT) It's not a toomah.
It's a muscle.

You could have it removed, but
then you'd only have a five pack.

It's too risky.

You're not
taking me seriously.

You already told me
you're on hypochondriac brain.

You should've
kept that to yourself

if you wanted more sympathy.

Blaine gives
all the best brains,

the people with the fun obits,
to his paying customers.

His hired help
gets the leftovers.

I want you to be
careful down there.

Blaine is selling Utopium out
of Shady Plots. I'm sure of it.

He's taking on Mr. Boss.

You almost had me.

Pathological liar brain.
I'm gonna have to be careful.

No. This is the truth.

You need to watch your back.

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

- Major?
- MAJOR: Hey.

You're not really palling
around with Blaine, are you?

What makes you think I've been
palling around with Blaine?

Well, it must've been when he
said you two were BFFs now.

Shh. My roommate's sleeping.

What are you doing
palling around with Blaine?

I'm not.

Look, I'm taking my grandmother
on a tour of cemeteries,

-and surprise, surprise...
- You visited Shady Plots.

So you do know
what he's up to.

But I'm not palling around
with him.

One of the weird, um,
“perks" of my job

is that I get to know
just about

every funeral director
in the city.

You didn't tell me.

Yeah, because I thought you might do
something unwise with the information.

Drop by the grenade store.

Okay, look,
anything I might do to him,

he'd deserve.

No arguments here, but you've gotta
know that he serves a purpose.

He's in charge of feeding
Seattle's zombies.

That's his gig.

At least now he's doing it
without murdering people.

- Okay. You need to move.
- What?

He thought it would be
cute to mention that

he knows here you live.

Look, just a building

with a doorman
and security cameras.

He knows where I work, too.

- So...
-(DOOR CLOSES BEHIND LIV)

MAJOR: Oh.

- You have company?
- Sorry?

It seems like there's someone
moving around in your bedroom.

Oh, no.
That's... That's my brother.

Oh, really? So, uh, you...

You two have
patched things up.

Everything's hunky-dory.

It must be if you're having
slumber parties.

His buddy
dropped him off here.

Evan tied one on,
and he's crashing here,

so that he doesn't have to face
Mom until he's sobered up.

And you know he's allergic
to pet dander, so...

- Oh, I didn't, actually.
- Yeah.

And my roommate is dog-sitting
her uncle's mini golden doodle.

So cute.
The dog, not the uncle.

Anyway, there's dog hair
all over the couch,

-and if Evan even gets close...
- Okay. Yeah, I got it.

Long story short, I am
sleeping on the couch tonight.

But I should get back to Evan

because I was just on a mission
to get his puke bucket.

(LAUGHS)

Thank you
for worrying about me.

- Oh, yeah.
- All right.

I'm sorry for swinging by
so late.

Tell Evan hi for me.

Sorry that took so long.

Oh, it's no biggie.
Work called.

G-Rad got attacked
by a drunk bachelorette.

Girl nearly took his eye out
with a penis straw.

They need me to go down there
and cover the door.

How about dinner tomorrow?
I make a mean brain ziti.

Yeah. Sounds great.
Wait. ls that another lie?

Hand to God.

I'll leave the key
under the mat

in case you beat me here.

And if you want to bring another
girl, we can make it a real party.

Cool.

That last part was a lie.

I know.

You wanted to see me, Boss?

You've been with us for about
a year-and-a-half now, Drake.

You work hard, but even
better, you work smart.

I think it's about time we gave
you more to do around here, huh?

You ready to pop that cherry?

I don't even need
to be sweet-talked.

Terrell Johnson.
He lives at 555 Brooksbank.

By tomorrow, that should
no longer be a true statement.

No problem. What did he do?

Does it matter?

Not even a little bit.

He took out one of our guys.

Looks like he's got it in his
head to settle old scores.

LIV: Everyone lies.

It's a coping mechanism.
A key survival trait.


Show me someone who always tells the
truth, and I'll show you a weirdo.


But maybe
the most dangerous lies


are the ones
we tell ourselves.


(POLICE SIREN BLARING)

That boy you like?

The one who gets shot, the one who
hangs out with Don E. and Blaine


and disappears
in the middle of the night.


You've never seen his place
or met his friends.


(POLICE SIRENS BLARING)

(GASPS)

(LINE RINGING)

CLIVE: Babineaux.

LIV: Clive, it's me.
I had a vision.


Terrell was lying.
He knew Big Fish.


He did?

Big Fish saw Terrell bent over Popeye
Collier's dead body, blood on his hands.

Big Fish could've put
Terrell away for murder.

That has to be why
Terrell killed him.

We should
drop back in on Terrell.

I can swing by first thing.

Great. I'll be ready.

Oh, and Clive, if you can, pick
me up a soy vanilla latte.

There's this new study that says caffeine
helps stimulate psychic activity.

Clive?

Clive!

(COFFEE MAKER GURGLING)

(EXHALES)

DRAKE: Hey, Terrell.

Mr. Boss sent me.

I'm afraid I have
some bad news for you.

(GRUNTS)

Mr. Johnson?
It's Detective Babineaux.

- Mr. Johnson!
- The door's ajar. Can't we just go in?

Mr. Johnson! Seattle PD.

Show yourself.

Mr. Johnson!

I'm gonna check the back.
Stay here.

Liv. Come here.

Someone left in a hurry?

Check out this laptop.

LIV: He was
researching flights to Mexico.

All of them leaving
the first thing this morning.

Looks like our visit motivated him
to get the hell out of Dodge.

An innocent man
doesn't hightail it to Mexico.

I'll call Homeland Security.

We should be able to have
someone waiting for him

if he gets on
one of these flights.

CANDY: Ooh, I could do blood dripping
out of the corners of your mouth.

- Make you even scarier.
-(DOOR OPENS)

That's not really the object.

(GRUNTS) A warning.
Your dad's still frozen.

I guess someone's gotta make an
obligatory popsicle joke, right'?

No? When did it get
so highbrow in here?

Hey, this isn't
for my benefit, right?

I still know
you're not a zombie.

Ah, but it's only a matter
of time, though, isn't it?

If we're on the same path
as Ravi's test rat?

We might as well
get comfortable with it.

Oh! They're so cute
when they're sleeping.

So, I held up
my end of the bargain.

You?

Why do you think I went
through all of this trouble?

Jeremy Chu. Our friend
in the fourth estate.

Welcome to Shady Plots.

Hmm, a funeral home.

I should've known that's how
you were getting your brains.

Well, how else
would one manage it?

I appreciate your patience in regards to
our sudden dearth in undead courtesans.

Luckily, there's always a few
ladies dying to join the team.

- Well, hello.
- CANDY: Hi, there.

I'm Candy.

There's a
Rolling Stones lyric.

“You could make a dead man...“
(GRUNTS)

You see? Wasn't that easier?

Now, for the real makeup job.

Little help here?

Where's the big zombie?

(LINE RINGING)

- This is Drake. Leave a message.
-(ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS)

Hey, it's me. I thought you
were coming over for dinner.

Text me
so I know you're alive?

Unless I'm being ghosted. In which
case that would defeat the purpose.

Ah, frack!

Fish. You don't gotta do this.

(GRUNTS)

(GRUNTS)

(GASPS)

Hey. It's just me.

I'm sorry
I'm getting here so late.

I saw you.

The night you were shot.

You didn't tell me
the whole story, did you?

You're an accessory to the
murder I'm investigating.

So Don E. killed Big Fish,

and Big Fish killed our two
would-be Utopium smugglers.

Vic Parisi and Lonny Evans.

And when Big Fish found out that Don E.
and Drake were looking for their bodies,

he tried to kill them, too.

That's great!

How is that great?

Don E. is the killer that Clive
and I have been looking for,

but Don E. knows
all about zombies.

And he shot Big Fish
in defense of my boyfriend,

who, by the way,
helped bury Big Fish's body.

That's obstruction at least.

Okay. So not so great
on that front.

But we know somewhere in those
Big Fish memories in your head,

you likely have
the information

about where our
Utopium smugglers are buried.

You just have to trigger
the vision.

I know. That's why I'm meeting Drake at
his high school buddy Vic's place later.

He's gonna get me
in the house,

and, with any luck,
the magic'll happen.

What's the Missy Elliott song,

"Cerebellum,
don't fail me now“?

I don't think
that's how it goes.

I've got an update
on the Big Fish homicide.

Our guy Terrell Johnson?
He's on the lam.

His passport and ID
were missing from his house.

Most of his clothes
were gone, too.

All signs point to Mexico.

Hmm.

Cops start sniffing around, so he
bought himself a one way ticket.

I'll put out an APB
and I'll...

Homeland Security
can look for Johnson.

He's not your problem anymore.

Keep the coffee fresh until another
homicide lands on your desk.

- They're K cups.
- DALE: Clive.

I just can't win
with that woman.

Check out this Shady Plots
surveillance photo.

It's blurry, it won't hold up in
court, but it could be something.

That's Blaine, obviously.

But the other guy. Doesn't it
kind of look like...

Major.

I'm here. Where are you?

DRAKE: (SIGHS) I'm so sorry, Liv.
I can't make it.

I swear to God it feels like
I'm having an appendicitis.


I know it's the brain,
but I feel like I'm dying.


As soon as I'm on another brain,
we'll drop by Vic's, okay?


Seriously?

CLIVE: Oh, God. Yes.

Okay. Feel better soon. Bye.

Bye.

(KNOCKS ON DOOR)

Hello?

Mrs. Parisi?

I'm Amy Allen.

I don't mean to bother you,
I was hoping to talk to you.

About your son, Vic.

I'm truly sorry for your loss.

My boyfriend was a friend of Vic's
back in high school, Drake Holloway.

Drake who?

Holloway.

Uh, I don't know who that is.

- Oh. - But sometimes I think
Vic had a whole secret life.

Oh.

Well, uh, the reason Drake
suggested coming to see you

is I'm a reporter.

I'm working on a story for Stars and
Stripes about decorated war heroes

who struggled to find work
upon returning home.

I was hoping to talk to you
about Vic.

Sure. Come on in.

It's been nearly two years
since Vic went missing.

Probably took me about half that
to admit to myself he was dead.

Do you have any more
recent pictures of Vic,

maybe from his service
or after he got back?

Sure.

That's his platoon in Fallujah and this
one's from his welcome home party.

And here he is
with his best friend Lonny.

- Please! You don't have to do this!
- Arghh!

(GASPS)

He survived so much
over there.

Lost his leg.

However he died,
I hope he wasn't afraid.

I hope it was quick,
and he didn't see it coming.

I'm sure it was.

Sorry.
I'm gonna go grab a tissue.

-(LINE RINGING)
- RAVI: Hello.

Ravi, I know where to dig.

He's buried by a swing set.

(EXHALES) I can't tell you how badly
we needed this news right now.

Why? What's wrong?

It's New Hope.

She died this afternoon.

- So Major.
- And Blaine.

They're on borrowed time now.

We need to find
that one-legged corpse ASAP.

(ANGUS SCREAMING)

(ONE DAY MORE FROM
LES MISERABLES PLAYS)


(SCREAMING CONTINUES)

(GASPS)

(MUMBLES)

Daddy?

You've come back to us.

After 50 years of praying,
here you are.

You missed it all.

The Zombie Apocalypse,
the Rapture,

the Ginger Rapture, the Great
Floods of '28 and '44.

Blaine? ls that you?

Quick!

We've got to get you out of here before Dr.
Zaius catches us!

You see, winter is coming!

(GROANS)

Son!

(GRUNTS) Please!

Help me!

“Please help me.“

Where have I heard
that before?

I know. I said it.

“Daddy, please help me.

“ Frau Bader beat me.

“Please help me,

“ Frau Bader made me
clean the kitchen floor

“with my tongue.

“ Frau Bader locked me
in a dog crate all day.”

You gave that woman
$100 million!

I see. (LAUGHS)

How long have I been out?
A few days?

If Frieda
is getting all my money,

that means
people think I'm dead

and that I (GRUNTS),

forgive my inability
to make air quotes,

died mysteriously.

And now your feelings are hurt
because I had the temerity

to include a provision
in my will

that has further evidenced

the remarkable foresight
on which my company was built!

You know, someone should
teach you how to humblebrag.

People might hate you less.

And for what it's worth,
I didn't “kill you."

I just negotiated
for your body.

For this. This moment.
For the joy it gives me.

Are you ready for your
close up, Poppy dearest?

You're about to make
a new video will.

No, son. I am not.

Because I know you.

You don't have the stomach
to do what's necessary.

I guess we'll never know.

You see, I'm gonna go upstairs
and have a sandwich,

leave you with a couple of
(SHOUTS) friends!

(DOOR OPENS)

- You might remember Chief?
-(DOOR CLOSES)

You had him shot in the face.

Oh, and Candy.

You tortured her,
cut off her fingers.

Have fun, you guys.

Come find me when he's ready
to make a new will.

Oh, and avoid the face.

We wanna leave him
camera-ready. (CHUCKLES)

Blaine.

Son!

-(MUSIC BECOMES LOUDER)
- ANGUS: Son!

(ANGUS SCREAMS)

LIV: Right around here.

"Uh!

Whoo-hoo. Whoo!

RAVI: Yeah!

(LAUGHS) Whoo!

(PANTS)

(MUSIC CRESCENDOS)

Yay!

(MUSIC ENDS)