Z Nation (2014–…): Season 2, Episode 8 - The Collector - full transcript

Previously on Z Nation...

I thought there was a mission

that dictated our
each and every action

and that anything
was justifiable

in service of the mission.

CITIZEN Z: The Centers
for Disease Control

is offering an enormous bounty
for Murphy's safe delivery.

- What the hell is going on?
- A damn Murphy free-for-all.

- Where's Cassandra?
- I mercied her.

I gave her life. And you had
no right to take that away.

She wasn't human.
Not since you bit her.



(GRUNTS)

(WHISPERS) Not right now.

DOC: Flashlight. No batteries.

Half a bottle of aspirin.

Well, I got no ammo. Found this.

I got two batteries
and four bullets.

I got two in my gun.
Two randoms in those.

- You got gum?
- For repair purposes only.

- Remember fresh breath?
- Oh.

Couple of bullets.
Road flares.

I got one empty clip.

You know what? See if these fit.

I know this looks shaky,

but we will find a way
to get Murphy to California.



Well, I'm hungry.

Hey, Sleeping Beauty.

(ECHOES)
What are you looking at?

DOC: Murphy.

- Wake up, man.
- What?

Help me find some lunch.
Nuts, fruit, edible tree bark.

Edible tree bark, huh?

(GROANS AND SPITS)

How does Euell Gibbons do it?

Don't eat that tree. (SPITS)
Terrible aftertaste.

-(HORN TOOTS)
- Let's roll! Come on, Murphy!

- Well?
- Two gallons.

- Maybe three.
- If we get 10 miles a gallon...

It'll get us halfway
to Plainview.

- Hey, where's Murphy?
- He's right behind me.

DOC: Damn it, Murphy!

(THEME MUSIC)

- SONG: ♪ Have mercy... ♪
-(THREE GUNSHOTS)

♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh
Have mercy. ♪

WARREN: How do you
just lose Murphy?

What do you mean,
he was just behind you? Really?

(GRUNTS)

(YELLS) Help!

Help!

Doc!

Doc! Warren!

Your mission's fallen
down the rabbit hole!

Vasquez!

Your bounty's missing!

Help!

ADDY: I'm gonna be really pissed
if my last words

are "Murphy, where are you?"

We may as well be saying,

"Here we are, zombies.
Come and get us."

Murphy better hope he's not around
when I reach 9,999.

Easy, kid.
We gotta find him first.

Well, I think
it's somewhere around here.

DOC: Oh, and don't eat the bark
off them skinny trees.

Starts out tangy
but then goes south in a hurry.

Oh, maybe it was over here.

At least you didn't flinch.

Better.

Good.

(METAL THUDS)

(CHOKES)

(HANDCUFFS CLICK)

(ZOMBIE SNARLS)

(SQUELCH!)

Oh, damn. I was hoping
we'd find him here napping.

That slippery bastard's
gonna spend the rest of his days

in shackles if I have
anything to say about it.

And I do.

(MAN HUMS)

Oh! Your eyes follow me
like a creepy painting.

That's weird for a Z.
Zombies are more like...

(MOANS)

I can't really do it.

(SAW BUZZES)

Yeah.

Yeah.

Didn't wanna kill him.
This one was a handful.

Hiding in the dark
to surprise me,

kicking my Z-catcher away.

Trying to remove my helmet. Ugh!

Sometimes I do wish
I was a doctor.

Consider myself
more of a collector, but...

Letters after a name
do not a genius make.

Those...quacks at the CDC
ignored me.

They should've listened to me.

What have we here?

Male, zombie. Well preserved.

You're fresh for a zombie.

But fresh Zs
are agitated and wild.

They only want to feed.
But you are so mellow.

(WHISPERS) Water...

Oh! That's interesting.

I've yet to meet a Z
that could speak.

And I've met a lot of Zs.

Does your brain
resemble his brain?

I'll have to remove your brain
from your head to see.

- No.
- No?

Bad idea?

-(LAUGHS)
-(WHISPERS) Wa...

Wa... Speak to me, zombie.
You can do it.

-(WHISPERS) Water.
- Synapses may be firing.

Wanker.

Water?
You just asked me for water?

- Yeah.
- A zombie is asking me for water.

Which is the water?

(MOANS)

Are you sure, bright eyes?
(LAUGHS)

You just maxed out
the zombie IQ test. (LAUGHS)

You're looking
severely dehydrated.

There you go.

Slowly.

(WHISPERS) More, please.

(CHUCKLES) My first talking z.

(LAUGHS)

It's like meeting a unicorn
that craps diamonds.

It's interesting.

Your flesh is deteriorating,

but you are compos mentis.

A conscious, aware,
thirsty zombie?

What are you?

My friends and I had car trouble

when I accidentally stumbled
into your pit.

Wait here.

(MOANS)

Can I help you
with something?

More water?

I'm not as isolated
as might appear.

My zombie safaris take me out
of my zipcode, and on occasion,

I catch interesting
internet and radio chatter.

CITIZEN Z: There's a man
travelling among you.

He's the only human known to
have survived a zombie bite.

His blood has the antibodies
to create a vaccine.

It is imperative
that he be transported alive

to the Centers for Disease
Control lab in California.

His name is Murphy.

Survivor of a zombie bite?

That'd make some kind of
half-man, half-zombie.

That'd be a far-fetched story.

A story that would require
irrefutable evidence.

MAN: Oh!

You are The Murphy!

(LAUGHS)

There, there, Mr Murphy.

Do a Zombie's cuts get infected?
The flesh is rotting.

I'm not a zombie.
(INHALES SHARPLY)

- And you feel pain?
- Uh, yeah.

What is up with those cards?

I'm constantly observing
and recording data all the time.

-(ZAPPING)
-(CRIES OUT)

(PANTS)
What the hell was that for?!

Pain is a useful teacher.

Hey, listen. Um...
ls this thing really necessary?

I've heard tell of The Murphy.

The stories suggest you are
the most dangerous man half-alive.

That's absurd. Listen.

My friends are gonna be
looking for me.

Friends?

You mean the bounty hunters
who were taking you to the CDC lab?

The CDC are idiots!

I thought we'd covered that.

MURPHY: These are all unopened.

After a while, they stopped
reading my warnings.

They were probably in on it.

The people actually want
to handle it.

The people are sheep.

Stay away from the CDC.

I will admit that
my interactions with the CDC

have left me
less than impressed.

Thank you, Mr Murphy.

It is refreshing
to hear you say that.

-(ZAPPING)
-(CRIES OUT)

Sorry! Total accident.

Damn it!
Be careful with that thing.

- You can relax, Mr Murphy.
- Can I?

Yes, because I don't
want the bounty.

I just want to know what it is
to be you.

MAN: Imagine
if the biggest Comic-Con ever

did it with the Smithsonian.

Voila.

MURPHY: You're making
a zombie museum?

It'll be much more than that
when we open the restaurants,

the nightclubs
and the gift shops.

And it won't be like one of those
candy-ass Comic-Cons

where they ban real weapons.

You're banned from Comic-Con?

I'm a zombie hunter.
Of course I'm carrying.

Costume play? Cosplay?

Not a real word. Ridiculous!
There is no play.

I told them this was coming.

They'll listen to me now.
Of course they're all dead.

MURPHY: Nice to have something
for the kids.

MAN: 'White Zombie'.
Have you seen this?

I missed that one.

I am not what you would call
a hardcore fan of the genre.

Released in 1932.

It is the grandfather
of the American zombie film,

starring Bela Lugosi.

'White Zombie'
introduced the notion

that shooting a zombie
in the chest would not kill it.

And they were right.

'I Walked with a Zombie',
from 1943.

Taps into the Haitian voodoo roots
of the mythology.

You see, Caribbean slaves feared

they would remain servants
even in death.

I've had that nightmare.

MAN: The one that
started it all for me.

Zombie lore has been part of
the collective consciousness

for decades,
but the works of George Romero

had a massive influence
on the culture.

Weaving social commentary
into a monster movie

gave his films a resonance.

It's in black-and-white?

- What's your favourite scene?
- Who can pick just one?

I think it's so scary
when the little girl turns

and the mother just stares.

Her baby is now a monster.

Eh. It happens.

What about your mother?

- My mother?
- Mm-hm.

She's gone.

MAN: Mine too. Zombies?

No. Before.

Oh. I'm sorry, Murphy.

It's hard in this world
with no-one to look after you.

Yeah, well.
I'm not him anymore.

'Dawn of the Dead', 2004.

Now, this one, I did see.

Scary AND funny.
That's how I liked my zombies.

A satisfying remake
of the Romero classic

and a stinging rebuke

of America's
consumer-driven society.

I get it-
zombies as consumers

driven by the mindless desire

to obtain useless shiny stuff,
blah, blah, blah.

-(ZAPPING)
-(CRIES OUT)

And to set it in
a suburban shopping mall? Genius.

Romero never explained
why the dead rise.

The not knowing is much more
horrifying, don't you think?

The knowing
is pretty horrifying too.

I get the feeling
you were often misunderstood.

MURPHY: First impressions
were never my strong suit.

Not very good
at second impressions either.

You are unique, Mr Murphy.

I can see
you are to be revered.

I can see you
sitting on a throne

dispensing the wisdom
of men, zombies

and all that will
come after men.

People will travel
great distances

to be in your presence.

Uneasy lies the head
that wears the crown.

Has there ever been
a zombie movie that captures

how exhausting and dirty
the apocalypse is?

I'm filthy all the time.

I blow my nose
and mud comes out.

You want a shower?

You have running water here?

Hot water?

-(WATER RUNS)
- Hot enough for ya?

I hate to ask, but what happens
when this thing hits the water?

Like a toaster in the tub.

(LAUGHS) Kidding.
It's waterproof.

Enjoy.

- Murphy!
- Ghost town.

- Nothing but quiet.
- Nothing. No-one here.

Without Murphy,
there's no mission.

Keep moving.

For as important as this guy is,
we sure lose him a lot.

Murphy!

(FOOTSTEPS APPROACH)

(GROANING AND SNARLING)

MAN: Wait! Wait!

- Wait! Wait right here!
-(SNARLING CONTINUES)

Murphy, that suit is so you.

(GROANS)

You're busy.
The others will be expecting me.

I'm kinda their mission.

Have I been talking to myself?!
You are their pawn!

I am nobody's pawn!

So, I'm gonna leave you two.
I'll see myself out.

It's a left, left, down the stairs
and to the right. Right?

(WEAPON FIRES)

MAN: My basement, my rules.

Damn.

You'll never make it
to California.

That is insane.

If the CDC wants to see you,

they're gonna have to
come to me.

If anybody wants to see you,

they're gonna have to
come to ME!

- MURPHY: What are you...
- How was your sleep?

Those elephant darts
sure pack a punch.

What are you doing to me?

Getting you miked up.

Oh, blood sample.

Your miracle blood might warrant
its own exhibit.

-(ZAPPING)
-(CRIES OUT)

(PANTS) Damn it!

That'll sober you up.

What is this?

Keeping proper records
is the most important part

of scientific research.

Plus, $12 admission price,

the public will expect
interactive exhibits.

In three, two...

Welcome to the National Institute
of the Zombie Arts.

I am Dean Madeline, founder.

I'm joined
by the only known human

to survive being bit
by a zombie.

Welcome.

-(ZAPPING)
-(CRIES OUT)

As you can see,
Mr Murphy feels pain.

At this stage of his evolution,

his central nervous system
responds to 50,000 volts.

Welcome.

Thank you.

It's my pleasure to be here.

Mr Murphy,
I'd like to take a DNA sample.

A simple swab.

- Say 'aah'.
- Aaah!

-(ZAPPING)
-(CRIES OUT)

I have so many questions,

but the most reliable data

will come from your cells.

As you can see,
I'm taking a plasma sample.

And...

What is that for?

This 6-inch needle...
8-inch needle...

...is for collecting
a bone marrow aspiration.

A bone marrow what?

A simple test to determine

whether you're more human
or zombie.

Bone marrow tells you that?

Won't know if you don't try.

That's the best part
about science.

Trying!

-(SQUELCH!)
-(MURPHY SCREAMS)

-(SNARLING)
- ADDY: Heads up!

Nobody's here.

Finally,
the opportunity to hear

directly from The Murphy
in an exclusive interview

that will dispel the rumours
and conjecture.

Can't I just pee in a cup?

Describe the circumstances

of the life-altering,
history-making attack

that left you infected
with the HZN virus.

Yes, well...

A few months
into the zombie outbreak,

I volunteered for a secret
government research program.

-(ZAPPING)
-(SCREAMS)

What?! (PANTS)

If you don't tell the truth,
who will?

I was in prison.

MURPHY: A scientist
used the prisoners

as guinea pigs
to test serums

to fight the zombie virus.

Most of the batches
didn't work.

Mine did. I think.

The lab was overrun by zombies
moments later.

And they left me.

The zombies attacked me,

bit me, tore my body open.

But I did not die.

What would you like to say

to the unprofessional
CDC doctor

who left you in that lab?

- That I will keep my promise.
- What promise?

I will...

...hunt you down
and eat your brains!

...brains.

And for other zombies?

Life is very simple.

One goal always,
driving them forward.

What do brains taste like?

I don't know.
I've never tasted them.

Mr Murphy,

the world's only living
hybrid man-zombie,

will now consume a human brain
for the first time.

- Actually, I would rather...
-(ZAP!)

(GROANS)

Mmm.

- Mmm! Mmm! Mmm!
-(LAUGHS)

- OK, we're gonna go on three.
- Uh-huh.

- One...
-(ZOMBIE GROWLS)

I said on three!

We do a three count every house,
we'll be here all day.

(HUFFS)

What's it like to be
a zombie whisperer?

That's how rumours
get started.

Can you control another zombie
with your mind?

Now, wouldn't that
be something?

DEAN: What about
that zombie in the pit?

- Wasn't that you?
- No.

Are you saying
that I captured you

and the smartest zombie
I ever met in the same day?

When you're hot,
you're hot.

What happens
when you bite a human?

Nothing.

Nothing special.

MURPHY: They die.

Do you feel connected
to the Zs?

I feel like a father.

Father?
That's an interesting choice of words.

Are you a parent?

I was, briefly.

I had a daughter.
She was so beautiful.

But I had to give her away.

I promised myself
I wasn't gonna do this.

What happened?

Enough questions.

Well, I think
that went quite well.

I'm gonna take this sample
off to the freezer.

And I'll be back
for that urine sample.

(SOFT GROWLING)

(ZOMBIE BUMPS TABLE)

You have opposable thumbs.
Do this.

That a boy.

-(CUTTER WHIRRS)
- Shhh! We know it works.

Focus up!

(WHIRRING STOPS)

Unbelievable.

(ZOMBIE GROANS)

That was awesome!

You're like a puppet master!

-(ZAP!)
-(ZOMBIE GROANS AND DROPS)

Thank you, Dr Henderson.
That'll be all.

I knew it was you in the pit
with the zombie. I knew it!

DOC: Murphy!

Murphy!

DOC: Come on, man.

Alright -
we need to fan out

or we won't find Murphy
by nightfall.

Well, why we got to split up?
I hate that.

MURPHY: What is this?

DEAN: The main exhibit hall.

Rudimentary, I know,
but my zombie collection is growing.

(ZOMBIES GRUNT)

Don't worry.
It's not really radioactive.

DEAN: I mean, the diorama isn't.
The zombie might be.

-(ZAP!)
- Toxic waste poisoning.

Probable cause of death.
No bite marks on him.

Phyto Z?

DEAN: Phyto?

-(ZAP!)
-(ZOMBIE SCREAMS)

(LAUGHS) I've been calling her
plant woman.

Phyto is better.

- Where did you find these?
- Hunting far and wide.

Not easy -
the CDC should be putting

this kind of effort
into observing Zs,

instead of playing poker
in their lab all day.

There are some awesome
mutations happening.

How did you capture
a blaster?

Blaster? You're good at this.

(ZAP!)

DEAN: This one was clever.

Probably in proximity
to a nuclear blast.

Blaster. Got it.

Part of his brain still works.
He can learn things.

I'm gonna teach him
how to juggle.

You can't keep
live zombies like this.

It's perfectly safe.
The invisible fence keeps them...

Almost forgot. Over here.

Celebrity zombie room.

Presenting
George R.R. Martin.

Who the hell's that?

(GROWLS SOFTLY)

He wrote
'A Song of Ice and Fire'.

-'Game of Thrones'?
- We didn't get HBO in the clink.

DEAN: Well,
he's my only celebrity Z so far.

- How? -I was at the last Comic-Con
when it all went down.

Some dirty guy with a crossbow
tried to help George escape.

Got eaten. I helped George
and his girls escape.

But they didn't last long
without room service.

Watch this.

DEAN: He has
amazing muscle memory

from all those years
of signing books.

It's a reflex.

I have hundreds of these.

I'm gonna make tons of money
when eBay comes back.

I'm gonna be damn rich!

(GROWLS SOFTLY)

MURPHY: Nice.

Maybe you can
do your mind thing

and help him finish
his next manuscript.

Maybe. ls it any good?

- They're always good.
-'Summer ls Here'.

It's already 800 pages.
How long does it need to be?

I was thinking about typing
"The End" on the last page.

We'll kill everyone
in the next book.

- Can I have this?
- Yeah, sure.

(GROANS)

Not gonna happen.

Time to go.

DEAN: I have no trouble
making you bleed!

I can see you
sitting on the throne

dispensing the wisdom
of men, zombies

and all that will come
after men!

DEAN: Mr Murphy.

I'll cut you in for a percentage
of the gate. That's fair.

OK, fine.
I can go 10% of concessions.

Not counting liquor sales.

I tell you what-
I'll throw in liquor sales,

but only after my sweat equity
has been recouped.

-(DOOR RATTLES)
- Oh, come on! Come on!

Where's a zombie
when you need one?

Man! You are a tough negotiator.

20% of all concessions,
including liquor, and we split

the George R.R. Martin
book sales down the middle.

- Open the door.
-50/50. Come on! That's fair.

Unlock the door or die!

(ZOMBIE GROWLS)

OK, Murphy-

It's gonna be like this
all the time? Fine.

(BUZZ!)

Go!

(ELECTRICAL ZAPPING)

Prima donna.

(WHEEZES AND SNARLS)

Betrayed.
That's what I'm feeling.

I've been too nice,
and you're too dangerous, so...

...l have no choice but to
drain your blood and freeze it.

You can't freeze my blood.

Says who? Some CDC quack?

- The antibodies.
- They'll figure it out.

- Or I will.
-l'm the mission.

-(ZAPPING)
- The mission is over!

- Oh!
- You're not unique, Murphy.

Though perhaps your blood is.

And anybody who wants a sample

can walk right up
to my front door.

(SNARLS)

You have some range.

You don't even have to be
right next to the zombie.

(CHUCKLES)
This is really something.

(ZAPPING)

(DEAN LAUGHS)

What else
can you make him do?

Will he...will he sing
if you sing?

(ZAPPING)

We...we could do this to music.

We could add a lightshow!

Be quiet.

(ZAPPING)

(ZAPPING CONTINUES)

Yes?

I'm looking for a friend.

Haven't seen anybody.

(ZAPPING STOPS)

-(ZAPPING)
- He's a tall guy.

Kind of weird blueish skin.

- Blueish fella? ls he ill?
-(ZAPPING CONTINUES)

ls there anyone else
in this town?

Nobody.

Anywhere else
my friend might have gone?

Sorry.

Good luck.

(ZAPPING)

(ZAPPING STOPS)

You almost made me
kill your friend.

Don't be embarrassed, Murphy.

Enough volts would humble
any man or zombie.

(SOFTLY) Murphy?

Murphy?

(SNARLING)

(ZAP)

(ZAP)

Murphy?

Murphy, you OK?

What is this?

(INAUDIBLE)

(ZAPPING)

DEAN: You bleed slowly.

- Anybody ever tell you that?
- Yes.

Well, look who's Mr Agreeable
all of a sudden.

The Murphy and His Amazing
Zombie Boy. (CHUCKLES)

I want to see what happens
when you bite a human.

Quit lying to me and show me.

- You don't have to do this.
- DEAN: Yeah, he does.

Do not let him turn me
into one of those things.

One of what things?

I don't know
what he's talking about.

-(ZAPPING)
- Arggh! Oh!

Patronise me again
and you will limp

for the rest
of your undead life.

I'm too weak.

VASQUEZ: How about you?
Anything?

Nothing.

Told you we should've
put that guy in a collar.

(GUNSHOT)

That shot definitely
came from that way.

DEAN:
That's just a warning shot.

No, just kill me.
Just shoot me in the head!

I want to see what happens
when Mr Half-Zombie Man

bites a living, breathing
human being,

and it's gonna happen now

or I'm gonna start
putting holes in people!

DOC: Murphy!

Oh, hey.

10K. He left us
a trail of crumbs.

MURPHY: There's nothing to fear.

I don't fear you. I hate you.

If you're the key
to mankind's survival,

we should all
just go to hell.

Finally, something we agree on.

-(ZAPPING)
- Ohh! Arggh!

(GASPS) I'm working here!

It won't be that bad.

What you did to Cassandra
was worse than death.

Just let it happen, kid.
You won't be afraid anymore.

-(ZAPPING)
-Ohh!

No! Please, Murphy. No!

Don't bite him on the face!
Don't bite him on the face!

I'm tired.
You took all my blood.

Bite him on the chest,
just like yours.

OK. OK.

(GIGGLES MANIACALLY)

It'll all be over
in a second.

No,no,no!

Is this what you want?

Yes! Show me what it feels like
to be a zombie.

-(MOUTHS)
- Arggh!

(SCREAMS)

Look at me.

(SCREAMS)

Look at me!

Bite me!

Now you know what it feels like
to be me.

There's no mercy in my world.

Don't watch this.

(ZOMBIES GNASH AND SNARL)

(PANTS)

I'm glad you found me, kid.

Now get me the hell
out of here.

Murphy. Murphy, you OK?

- Murphy?
-(SNARLING)

Murph... Murphy, wake up.

Hey, I'm with him.

What is all this?

10K: Come on, Murphy. Wake up!

Wake up, Murphy! Murphy!

Come on. Wake up! Murphy!

Murphy!

How'd a phyto
get all the way down here?

- Oh, I hate them blasters.
- Yo, I got two bullets left.

- Anybody else?
- I gave mine to 10K.

- Don't look at me.
- I got two. 10K!

Draw 'em over this way!

I'm out.

The weirdest freaking zombies.

The zombie fun pack.
Collect all 10.

DOC: Well, what happened to him?
Murphy, can you hear me?

He's OK. You're gonna be OK.

Oh! Look who's still alive.

It's OK if you don't
want to talk about it.

- That's why I'm not talking.
- Yeah. No, I get it.

VASQUEZ: I have half a mind
to leave this on.

How about a cowbell?

That'll attract Zs.

Yeah, well,
what difference does it make?

He yawns
and they come running.

Is that all of it?

You feel like
you're missing six pints?

Mmm, I don't know.

I've been unconscious a lot
today.

Alright, well, hold still.

You should feel better soon.

What do you care?

Bags of blood are here.
Take 'em. They're yours.

Go get your cure.

Try not to run off again.

We're all counting on you
to stay alive.

Warren.

Promise me...

...you won't leave me alone
if we make it to California.

I promise you.

Saddle up.