Younger (2015–…): Season 3, Episode 12 - Episode #3.12 - full transcript

[upbeat music]


- I still don't understand.

Josh showed me
the engagement ring.

I gave him our room key.

He was so excited.

I was so excited.
- I don't know.

I don't know, I guess...

I guess he got cold feet.

- [sighs]
My God, I'm so sorry.

- Oh, it's okay.

- Would you have said yes?

- I'm not sure I'm ready
to get married.

Maybe Josh
realized that too.

I mean, what's the rush,

- I hate him now.

- No, don't say that.

Josh is wonderful.

- It's just so weird.

What could've happened
between the time I saw him

and when you got back
to the room?


- Oh, God, Liza, no!
- Yeah.

- Wait--you think he saw you
kiss Charles

right as he was about
to propose to you?

- It's the only explanation.

- That poor guy. He must want
to gouge his eyes out.

- Oh, thank you.
That's very helpful.

- I guess I should've
called you.

- Wait--you knew about this?
- Well, not exactly.

But I had coffee
with Josh when you were away.

He was just so heartsick
over you.

I guess I should have
just kept my mouth shut.

- What did you say?

- I said if he loves you
he shouldn't lose you!

- Oh, God, Maggie.

- I thought he was gonna write
you a song or something,

not propose marriage.

- He wrote "marry me" on the bed
in rose petals.

- Oh, sweet.

It's kind of like a floral text.

- Oh, God. I've gotta find a way
to make this right somehow.

- Wait, how did
this Charles thing even happen?

- Well, it was equal parts
gin, tonic, sea air,

and that great old song
"Take My Breath Away."

- That song does crazy stuff
to people.

In high school I slept
with Tommy Mannetti

because of that song.

And also his sister,
Tammy Mannetti.

[hip-hop music]


- * Ooh, oh

* Don't ask, don't tell *

[singing indistinctly]

* Ooh, oh

* Don't ask, don't tell *

* Chillin' in the cut *

- No, no, no, no, no.
Kels, hi! Welcome back!

- What's going on?
- I have some amazing news.

Max and I are moving in

- What? Since when?

- I don't know. We've been
spending all of our spare time

with each other anyway,
so we figured,

what the hell,
let's just take the leap.

- Are you sure you're gonna be
able to handle

that tiny little apartment
with all those roommates?

- No, no, I'm sure I can't.

That's why he's moving in here.


- Okay.

[indistinct chatter]

- Hey, look who's back
from the Hamptons.

- Hey, roomie.
- Welcome back, beauty.

- Hi.
- Did you hear the news?

We're gonna have our own
in-house medical professional.

- Even 15 CPW doesn't have that.

- Of all the crazies
that this girl brings home,

who would have predicted
a nice, Jewish doctor?

- Yeah. He's sweet.

- Mom loves
that I'm being basic.

- I love Max.
- I know you do.

Oh, Kels, one quick thing.

Max needs a little bit of space
in the front closet,

so if you could just,
you know...winnow.

- Of course.

[women vocalizing]


- * Baby, baby,
won't you come with me *

* I'll make you happy *

* Don't you think
that you wanna see *


* What's on the other side *

* Maybe go out for a ride

* Lose our sorrows
in the tide *

- Liza.
- Hey.

- Look, I just wanted
to apologize

for intruding on--

- You don't have to apologize.

- I'm sure you know

how fond I am of you.

But I never meant
to step between a happy couple.

And I can assure you,

I won't be stepping in again.

Good luck with Josh.

- * Take it now

* Take it now

* Take it now

[cell phone chimes]

[inspirational music]

- Is your life spiraling
out of control?

Are your goals unclear?

Are your relationships
in turmoil?

- Mm.

- Do you even know
what you want anymore?

What if you found out
that that's okay?

Because it is only
at our lowest point

when we're in the deepest pain

that we unearth
what we really want

and who we really are.

Who you really are
is beautiful.

Who you really are is kind.

Who you really are
is loving and pure.

I'm Antonia Steward,

and I can help you find
that person again.

All I need is your commitment
to get real.

- Diana, thank you.

- For what?
- That video.

What made you think
to send it to me?

- Antonia Steward
is writing a book.

We're having a meeting her
in an hour.

This one book could be the whale

that feeds the whole company
for year--

Pull yourself together, Liza.


- Thanks for coming, guys.

Listen, I don't need
to write a book.

People are begging me
to write a book.

My seminar has transformed
over 1.5 million lives

in 21 countries.

And after each and every one,
people ask me,

"Where can I buy your book?
Where can I buy your book?"

- Antonia.
- We'll talk later.

All bidders for my book need to
attend my seminar tomorrow.

I'll set aside two tickets
for Empirical.

- I'll let you three
fight over the tickets.

I'm late for a meeting
back in midtown.

Excuse me.

- You know, three months ago,

I would have snapped up
those tickets, but not now.

I don't need Antonia Steward.

I have it all.

I'm happy.

They say life starts
when you're 40.

And so does the best sex
I have ever...ever...ever--

- Got it.
- Thank you.

- Okay.

- [grunting]
- You're a beast, man.

You're a beast! Come on.
Give me two more, two more.

- Hey, guys.
What's, uh...going on?

- Max has to get in his Power 30
between call hours.

Come on!
- Sorry to sweat on your rug.

- Is the plan
for the weight bench to be

in my room all the time?

- Yeah, sorry.

We just didn't have
any place else.

You don't mind, do you?

You can hang out
and watch us pump if you want.

Come on.

- [grunting]

- Yeah!

- Ooh.

- Hey.
- Hello.

- Did you know about
that bench press situation?

- Oh, I know,
it keeps his body so tight.

- No, I mean,
he's keeping it in my room.

- Oh, right.

- Look, I know I'm staying
at your parent's house for free

and I am so grateful
for that, but...

- But what?

- You could've given me
some warning.

It would have given me time
to figure things out.

- Kelsey, it was either
right now,

or Max would have to pay
another month's rent.

- You didn't consider me at all.

- I thought
you'd be happy for me.

- I am happy for you.

[Max grunting]

- One more, one more, come on.

[upbeat techno music]

[knock at door]

- Hey.
- Thank you, babe.

This is only for a few nights,
I promise,

until I find my own place.
- Hey, lucky me.

- [laughs]

- any more suitcases?

- No. Why, are you worried?

- No.
- Okay.

- Grape?

Elphaba, do you want a grape?

Then say "grape."


- PetMD says the way to
get her to talk

is to bring her
around more people.

- Well, that makes sense.

She sits here in silence all day
while we're at work.

It's cruel
when you think about it.

I'm gonna take her to the office
with me tomorrow.

- That's a great idea.

You know what else
is a great idea?

[Diana laughing]

- So you're staying with Colin?

- Just until I find a place.

I got a broker, but so far
the only thing she sent

that I could legitimately afford
is this:

"Cozy basement studio.
New paint. No stove.

Call for neighborhood."
That definitely means Inwood.

No longer available,

- Aw. Well listen,
I'm sure Maggie wouldn't mind

if you crashed with us
for a little while.

- Thanks, that means a lot.

But something's gotta
come through.

- Please welcome to the stage,

Antonia Steward!

[cheers and applause]

- Jesus.

- Hello Newark
and the Tri-State Area!

Are you ready to Get Real?

[cheers and applause]

Okay people,
I have one question for you.

What will make you happy?

You. Ma'am.

You're nodding.

Come on up.
- Yeah.

[cheers and applause]

- What will make you happy?

- Losing weight.

- Take off your Spanks.

- [laughs] Excuse me?

- Just wriggle out of 'em.

You're wearing a dress.

- Okay. [laughs nervously]

- You can just leave 'em.

How do you feel?

- Great.
- I can't hear you.

- Great!

- No restrictions,
no pressure.

This is you,

the real you.

How do you feel?
- Great!

- Now what will make you happy?

- A divorce.

[cheers and applause]

- That's more like it!

That is real!

See your group leader
at break for strategy pillars.

[cheers and applause]

Now who's next?

[crowd cheering]

No. No. Attention seeker...

You, sir.

Come on up.

- Yeah!


What will make you happy?

- I just want my wife back.

- Oh, my God.
- What?

- She's so amazing.
- I want my wife back!


- What's stopping you?

- Well, I made some
huge mistakes

and now she's got
this younger boyfriend.

- Okay, well, we're gonna help
you grow some balls

and get your wife back.

[cheers and applause]

Have you owned your shit?

That takes some balls.

What did you do
to kill the relationship?

- Well, I-I sort of cheated.

- Sort of cheated?

[audience boos]

- What a douche.

- I feel sorry for his ex-wife.

[audience booing]

- [stammering]
I cheated.

[audience is silent]

And I had a--

Okay, I had a gambling problem
as well.

But I've cleaned up my act.
I swear.

- Okay. Let's give him a hand
for cleaning up his act.

- Cleaned up!


- Now, the next step
is to apologize.

- No, I already have.
Many times.

But she won't listen;
she's too busy with her boy toy.

You know, partying her ass off
around Brooklyn.

- Sounds like
she's gone off the rails.

- Yeah, no, she has, totally.

She's forgotten about her

All she thinks about
is her new hipster life

and impressing
this dumb little boyfriend.

- Get out your phone.
- You want me to call--

- No names.

Just call her. Now.

- [stammering]
- Now!

- While you have clarity.

And the support of everyone

[cheers and applause]

- I don't--

- Call her. Be a man.
Call her. Be a man.

all: Call her. Be a man.
Call her. Be a man.

Call her. Be a man.

- Okay, okay, okay, I'll do it!
I'll do it! I'll do it!

I'll do it right now!

[cheers and applause]

- Do you know what?

I-I-I'm gonna run
to the bathroom, okay?

[phone vibrating]

- It's ringing.

It's ringing.

- It's ringing.

[cell phone vibrating]

- Sounds like she's not there.

Or she doesn't have the courage
to speak to you.

- She's probably
at some hipster bar,

knocking one back.

- Sounds like a real party girl.

- She sounds like a bitch!
- Hey!

We cannot judge her
until we talk to her.

[cell phone vibrating]

- Hello?


[disguising voice] Hello?

[knock at door]

- Do you have a moment?

- Of course. Come in.

- Oh, your--your prized parrot.

- Yes. According to the experts,

she needs to be around people

in order to start talking,
which I would love to hear.

Pretty girl. Pretty girl.

Animals are so mysterious.

- Well, I can help expose her

to some people who'd love
to meet her.

Nicole's class is here
visiting the office

on a little field trip.

- Perfect. Bring them in.

- Girls, come on.

- Oh! There's a lot of them.

Oh, you just--just keep coming.

- Girls, this is Diana Trout,
Empirical's Head of Marketing.

She's incredibly important here,

helping our company
to sell all our books.

- That's your parrot, right?

- That is Elphaba.

Named after the wonderful
and verdant character

in the Broadway musical,

[Elphaba moaning]

- Is Elphaba sick?

- Listen to that!
You girls are quite lucky.

These is the first sounds
Elphaba has ever made.

[Elphaba moans]
- Is she singing?

[Elphaba moans]

[Elphaba groaning]

- Everyone stop exciting
the bird.

She's getting a little

- Is that what's happening?

[Elphaba moans sensually]

- Easy does it, pretty girl.

- Yes, Richard! Yes, Richard!

Right there! Right there!
- Okay, okay, okay.

And it's time to move along.
- Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!

- Who wants
a chocolate chip cookie?

Okay, let's go.
- Faster! Faster!

[Elphaba moans and whistles]

- You're on speakerphone
in front of hundreds of people

who just gave me the courage
to say this.

I want you back.

Forget the past.

Just come home.

It's not too late, babe.

- I'm sorry.

I've moved on.

And you need to do the same.

- Hi. I just want to intervene.

So you're in a
committed relationship

with your young boyfriend?

- Well...not exactly.

- Why not?

Because you chose someone
who couldn't commit.

- No, he-he can commit.

He proposed to me.

- What?

- Yeah, yeah, he, uh...

he put his whole heart
right out there.

- And what happened?

- I...I messed it all up.

- Why did you mess it up?

- I'm self destructive.

- And?

- And...

[scoffs] I don't know.

- Because you do not love him.

- Yeah.

- Yes, I do.

- Are you sure?

Dig deep in your heart.
It's time to get real.

[gentle music]


- I do.

I do love him.

I really do.
I really love him.

- Then why are you wasting time
talking to your ex-husband?

Hang up the phone right now

and go get your man!

[cheers and applause]


[upbeat music]


Get real.


- Hey.

- Hey.
- I just had the craziest day.

- You and me both.

I just got word that Netflix
wants to fly me out to LA

to discuss adapting
my book into a series.

- What?
Oh, my God!


I'm so happy for you.
- It's great.

I mean, it's also kind of

- Yeah.

- Which got me thinking.

Maybe now is--it's not such
a good time for you to move in.

- I'm not--I'm not moving in.

I'm just staying here
for a few nights

until I can find my own place.

- No, Kels, I know how it works.

The last girlfriend who brought
a duffel to my place,

she didn't leave for two years.

- Are you being serious?

- I just--I can't have
any distraction.

It isn't like
I want to stop seeing you.

[cell phone vibrating]

Pippa. I gotta grab it.

Hey. No, yeah.

Hell, yeah, I'm totally psyched.

Just give me the talking points.


[knocking on door]

- Josh. I know I made a mistake.

But I need to make things right.

- How?

I saw you. With him.

- I know. There's no excuse.

- Do you love him?
- I love you.

- You were everything to me.

- And you are everything to me.
- Liza, Liza--

- You have to forgive me.
- Liza!

I didn't care about
your teenage daughter,

I didn't care about
your ex-husband,

or having a baby.

I chose you.

But you're a liar.

And a cheater.

And whether
you realize it or not,

your lies are hurting everyone
around you.

- Josh--
- No. No, no.

No more.


No more.

[Rihanna's "Stay"]


- * Not really sure
how to feel about it *

* Something in the way
you move *

* Makes me feel like

* I can't live without you *

* It takes me all the way

* I want you to stay

[door slams]


- Come here.

- Maggie, I messed
everything up.

- It's okay.


Pull yourself together
'cause we got company.

- Hey. I texted you
like three times.

I'm sorry to just come by,

I couldn't stay
at Colin's for one minute.

Are you okay?

- Kelsey.


I have to show you something.


This is my daughter, Caitlin.

- What?

- She's in college.

And I'm not 26.

I'm gonna be 41
in a few weeks.

- I don't understand.

- Then let me explain.