Xena: Warrior Princess (1995–2001): Season 1, Episode 18 - The Prodigal - full transcript

After she and Xena are assaulted, Gabrielle asks herself if that's really the kind of life she wants to spend and returns to her village, Potadeia, which is going to be attacked by a warlord. Their only help will come from a former mighty warrior, Meleager, who is now but a shade of he used to be, while Gabrielle has to face her sister, Lila, who doesn't like the decision she took when she decided to travel with Xena.

Sorry.

I said sorry. Everyone's a critic.

You know the Orpheus legend?

How he plays music so well,
it moves mountains.

Now, I know it's only a myth,
but...

There's often a kernel of truth in
even the wildest story.

-So, what if I just tried...
-No.

No.

-It was just a thought.
-Here's another one.

I have a proposition
for you, ladies.

Think about being skewered
against the stone a la carte...



...or simply
giving us what we want.

And I do mean everything.

You're not only scum,
you're dreamers.

And you, my dear, are stuck
between a rock and a hard place.

So, what do you say? Shall we be
civilized about this?

Why start now?

Xena!

Xena!

Xena!

Yes!

The cart!

Xena, look out!

Lie down!

Gabrielle, now!



Come on!
We need a bigger cart!

Nothing like a good ambush
to liven things up, huh?

-Yeah.
-Hey, you all right?

Yeah, yeah, I'm good. I'm good.

Considering I was almost
road kill, I'm... I'm perfect.

Come on, we've been in
tighter spots than that.

Yeah, you are right. Yeah.

Since hooking up with you, well,
I've nearly been eaten by a cyclops...

...and I was almost forced
to marry Morpheus...

...and practically squashed
by a titan.

Why did I just freeze up?

I don't know, you're burnt out.
It happens.

It didn't happen to you.

No, that's why
I always try to remember...

"Act, don't react.". Go with your gut.

We'll have to double back and take the coast.

It's longer,
but it's safer too.

-I don't think so.
-Sure it is.

No, I mean...
I can't go with you.

Gabrielle...

It was a dangerous situation. You'd
have been crazy not to be scared.

I froze, which put
us both at risk.

-If you hadn't been there, then...
-But I was.

Today yes. But what about tomorrow?
And the next day?

I can't expect
you to always be there for me.

It was just one incident.

I can't endanger you.

Don't you see that?
I'm just a liability.

It's a risk I think I can take.

But I can't.

I can't help you with this.

You're gonna have to figure it out yourself.

I know.

-Where will you go?
-The only place I know.

Home. Things
are simpler there.

My sister, Lila's there. I can
talk to her about this.

What you can't talk to me?

Of course I can. I just...

Sometimes you need your
family to help solve things.

-I'm sorry.
-No...

I have to find out what's going on
with me, and I have to do that at home.

But you're coming back, right?

I guess that depends
on what I learn.

In the time of ancient gods...,

warlords

and kings,

a land in turmoil
cried out for a hero.

She was Xena.

A mighty princess

forged in the heat of battle.

The power.

The passion.

The danger.

Her courage will change the world.

XENA - WARRIOR PRINCESS

Another 22 leagues to go?

How is it, man can solve
the riddle of the sphinx...

...but he still can't make a
decent road map? I don't know.

Please! Please!

Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!

You son of a...

Hey there, don't I know you?
Come on, come on.

Yeah. You're the chatty one.

Boy, you've changed
since I saw you.

Oh, well, yes. You know, it's a sad story...

-...which began with King Sisyphus.
-Sisyphus?

-I met him once. A fat man...
-Well, actually he's thin.

-Never married.
-His wife's name is Karis...

-...and she's lovely.
-Dumber than a door post...

Are we talking about the same Sisyphus?

Fraid this is where our
paths diverge.

You sure you're gonna be all right?

You know, it's still a day's walk to Potadeia.

Oh, I'll be fine.

I know a shorcut throught these woods
that'll get me home in no time.

The woods?

You sure that's wise,
the shape you're in?

Oh, don't worry.
The exercise will do me good.

I don't know you, modern young women.

Suit yourself. Ciao.

Come on.

Excuse me.

Uh, beg pardon...

Sir!

I'm sorry to intrude.

What happened?

Damon's what happened.

Him and his gang of thieves
came for their tribute.

Only this time
we held some of the food back.

You know, for our son.

Come winter,
our little boy gets awful hungry.

-I'm so sorry...
-Don't be.

We're well out of it.
You wanna pity someone...,

...pity the folks
of Potadeia.

Potadeia? Wait, why Potadeia?

'Cause that's where Damon said
he was striking next.

Thank the gods.

Where is everyone?

Hurray!

Gabrielle?

Is that you?

Lila!

I can't believe you're back.

I know. I'll explain later.

Listen, a man named Damon,
and his gang, are on their way here.

To sack and burn the village?
Strip it of everything valuable?

Old news, Gabrielle.

Damon and his men have been
hitting us for food and supplies...

...every few months
since you left.

They use us while his
men attack other villages.

I don't suppose you've brought
the woman wonder with you.

Who cares?

We don't need Xena to save us.

We've hired a warrior of our own.

Meleager, the Mighty.

That's who we're here to welcome.

Isn't he the guy
who single-handedly killed 100 men...

-...at the battle of Liguria?
-200.

-2 hundred and 50.
-3 hundred and 17.

But, then again, who's counting?

-Is he dead?
-Dead drunk.

On three, ok?

One, two, three!

Now, tell me again
how we got stuck with him.

You're the only one who's worked
with a warrior before.

A warrior?

Xena would never act like this.

It shows a total
lack of respect...

...not just for us,
but for himself.

And one thing a fighter
can't afford to lose...

...is self-respect. As a matter of fact...

Well, if Xena's so perfect, I'm
surprised that you can stand to be...

...around simple people
like us. You know, your family.

What?

And so, my friends and fellow citizens,
without further delay...

...I give you...
Meleager, the Mighty.

Meleager, the Mighty!

Meleager, the Mighty!

Greetings, good people of...

Potadeia.

Sorry about yesterday's...

...illness, but...
I'm fit now...

...and ready to do battle with...

...someone.

Still, I'm gonna
need a few things first.

Where's my money?

Well, it's right here, in the strongbox.

If you recall, the deal was
you get half up front...

...and the rest when you finish the job.

Ah, right. Just checking.

All right, now, I'm gonna need an arsenal.

So, I want you to go gather your
spears, knives, bows, arrows...

Anything that's sharp and heavy
enough to become a weapon.

All right, run along, now.
That's a very lovely hat, young woman...

You should have her bathed
and brought to my tent.

Lila, look, we need to talk.

Talk? We haven't talked for
months, why start now?

I'm gonna go get our meat
skewer. It's not much of a weapon...

-...but at least I can rely on it.
-Boiling oil...

What's that supposed to mean?

N-dried hard rodents are good
to lift up off the road and...

Anyway... How am I doing?

Lila, would you please
tell me what's wrong?

I already told you, nothing's wrong.

Nothing? Well, if that big freeze number
of yours is nothing...

...I'd like to see
your idea of something.

-Now that would be...
-My idea of something.

-Those men work for Damon.
-Let's get Meleager.

So the cyclops says
to the unicorn...

Meleager, quick!
Damon's scouts are here.

Oh yeah? Well, that's to bad,
because this is empty.

-You're drunk?
-Yes.

What'll we do?

Smart move... stopping
right where you are.

Unless, of course, you want
to take on Meleager, the Mighty.

Meleager? I heard he
killed 400 men at Liguria.

I heard 500.

So, what's it gonna be, guys?

I can't hold this
killing machine back forever.

Great job. They're gone.

What're we gonna do when
they come back with Damon?

That's a good question. It's a cinch
he won't be much use to us.

But he has to be!
He's all we've got!

Well, what about getting the other villagers
to band with us against Damon?

Without a warrior, no one's got the nerve.
That's why he has to it.

Is it true? Was it Meleager?

-Sure as we're standing here.
-They say he killed 500 men at Liguria.

I heard it was 625. But that's not
the number that interests me.

No, the figure
I'm thinking of is 50.000.

As in the 50.000 dinars that
are being offered for the capture of Meleager.

Who wants him that bad?

A warlord named Cassius.
Turns out his sons were at Liguria.

Get some water. Cold water.

I'm awake!

I'm awake. I'm well aware
of my surroundings.

Where am I?

Poder... Pewter... Podoohickey?

-Potadeia.
-Potadeia!

Do you realize that there are people out there
counting on you?

And this is what you show them...

What do you know?
A farm girl like you?

How could you begin to understand
the kind of work I do or how I live my life?

-You might be surprised.
-I doubt it.

Blood, killing, the gore...

It would turn your stomach
to hear about it.

Never mind having to live day after day never
knowing when the next attack will come...

About the sieges?
Who's your enemy? Who's your friend?

What you're going to have to deal with? How?
And when you might freeze?

You lost your nerve.

That's why you drink.

Can you think of a better reason?

No. But I can think of
a reason not to.

We hired you to
get rid of Damon.

Yeah, well, you guys are going
to have to buy some decent weapons.

I'd say a rack
of thoses spartan javelins would do quite well.

The kind that can shoot through
fifteen sheets of siege wood.

They make that awful whistling sound.

Scares 'em every time.
That's what you're gonna hafta buy, yeah.

And with what? The village couldn't
afford both you and weapons.

They chose you.

What good are special javelins
if no one here can throw them?

The truth is, you're all we've got.

And you're a worthless drunk.

Ok. No more wine until tonight.

No more wine till it's done.

Well, let's not be
too hasty. What will I drink?

My guess is they'll come this
way. The most direct route.

Right. If we don't stop 'em
here, it's the village or nothing.

-What do you mean?
-What do you think of stringing a garotte along here?

-What's that?
-Good idea.

-We're gonna need some coverage trees.
-Coverage trees? What...

Right. You go left,
we'll go right.

The first one who finds
coverage shouts out. Got it?

-I still don't know what we're doing.
-We're looking for coverage trees.

Then, we'll anchor a
garotte for the ambush.

-Now, what part didn't you get?
-All of it.

Never mind. Xena taught me
what to look for.

Tell me, Gab, is there anything
Xena doesn't know...

...or should we build her a
temple right now?

-Lila, are you jealous of Xena?
-Jealous?

No, just because you
chose her over me.

-I didn't choose her over you.
-Sure you did.

But I don't blame you. Next to
Xena, I must seem pretty dull.

I don't even know what
a coverage tree is.

Lila, we talked about
this before I left.

Now, I thought that you were happy
I was getting out to see the world.

I was happy.

Until I realized getting out
meant leaving me.

How come it took you so long
to come home?

You hardly ever sent word.

It was like you
forgot I existed.

I never forgot you, ever.

Look, Lila, Xena's my friend,
yes, but you're my sister.

Nobody could ever replace you.

In fact, you're the reason
I came home, for good.

Hey!

Mealeager must have found something.
Now, look, you see, we have to have...

Meleager!

Meleager!

Where'd he go?

Wherever it is, it's a sure bet
he didn't go willingly.

One guy came in. He moved here.

Meleager took him down.

Two of them hit him from behind and...

Fresh drag marks...

The kind a litter makes.

And they're deep, which means
that they were carrying something heavy.

Meleager. Do you think
somebody killed him and...

No, if they'd killed him,
they would have left the body.

Minus the head, of course,
as proof.

-I'm going after him.
-Me too.

No.

Look, the important thing
is to safeguard the village, right?

The people would panic if
they knew Meleager was missing.

You have to stay and make sure
they don't find out. Will you do that?

-You want me to join you?
-Why not?

You could be worth a lot more to me than the
50.000 dinars Cassius is offering.

50.000, alive.

But if I have to,
I'll take the 20 for your head.

Your reputation alone's enough...

...to make whole towns
surrender to us without lifting a sword.

So, what do you say?

Remove these chains.
You'll get my answer.

You make me sad.

-Take him away!
-Come on.

We caught her near the horses.

Who are you? What do you want?

Well, those are two very good questions...

...and not to be answered
lightly.

After all, do any of us
really know who we are?

And as for what we want, well...

I think it was Sophocles
who once said...

-Kill her.
-Oh, no. You know...

Wait!
You still want me to join you?

A little incentive might
help. You know what I mean?

Why not?

I'll even throw in my tent
for some privacy.

All the better to persuade you.

Hey, listen, guys.

I really think we can work
this out. Just listen to me.

What, in the name of
Zeus, are you doing?

-What does it look like? I'm rescuing you.
-That's not what it looks like.

Maybe not. But it will,
now that I'm on the inside.

-You have a plan?
-Any minute now.

Oh, Meleager.

Oh, the gods preserve me.

Oh, the gods! Oh, yes!

No wonder they call you "The Mighty".

Once we're out of here...

That ought to slow Damon down, huh?

-Yeah, we got a lot to do.
-Let's get to it.

Good. Good. Nice job.

Gabrielle.

Meleager.

We need to concentrate...

...on which part of the village
they're gonna be coming in from...

I've got it.

So, everyone's clear about
when to stay on watch?

There's only one thing left to do...

And that's to thank the man
whose courage and skill...

...we can rely on to protect us.

A man whose very name strikes fear
into the hearts of his foes.

Fellow citizens, I give you
Meleager, the Mighty.

Go on.

Look, the town needs a warrior.

The town has a warrior.

This time tomorrow, you'll be taking
the rest of the money from this strongbox...

...and leaving, never
to think of us again.

But, for the rest of our lives...

...we'll always be grateful for
your strength and fearless bravery.

Three cheers for Meleager, the Mighty.

Lila?

Lila.

Gabrielle, I fell asleep on watch.
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to.

It's all right. It's all
right. I was keeping an eye out.

Besides, you deserved it.

I watched you yesterday. You know what I saw?

I saw a competent, caring woman.

You weren't the little girl you were
when I left here. It just hit me.

You are... You've grown up.

Sometimes I just think I'm growing old.

But you, planning all those
traps... Getting set...

Figuring out those strategies... Xena
really taught you a lot, huh?

Yes, she did. She taught me
when to fight, when to talk...

She taught me how to know the difference
between a friend and an enemy.

And, she taught me what it means
to have a best friend.

Then, why'd you come back?

Because some things
can't be taught.

Some things, you either have or you don't.

Like the connection you can
only feel with your sister.

Xena can't teach me
that. I already have it.

All right, enough of this mushy stuff.

No. We need to be on watch.

-I can only imagine what Xena would say if she saw us.
-There they are.

-No, but I mean after she said that.
-No, there they are. Damon and his gang.

Ok. You find Pharis. Tell
him to sound the alarm.

-I'll get Meleager. Go.
-All right.

Meleager!

Mealeager, quick! They're here!

-I ran into Pharis.
-Where's Meleager?

-He's not with you?
-No. And look, the money's gone.

So is Meleager.

We should have given up in the first place.

If we give them the food,
maybe they won't...

Pharis, let's not panic.
Now, Meleager was important to us, yes.

Important? We're
farmers, not fighters.

We counted on him. He stole our
money and left us to die.

I can't explain
why he left...

...but this is our chance to
start counting on ourselves.

Now, we have these traps.

Meleager's the key to
our whole defense.

-Without a warrior, we're dead.
-But we have a warrior.

-Gabrielle can lead us.
-Gabrielle?

Me?

Who better than a student of Xena's?

Everybody, please, stop!

Listen to me!
I'm no hero, believe me.

But the way I see it,
we have two choices...

We either take a stand
and possibly die...

...or we surrender
and die for sure.

It's time to stop
talking and start fighting.

Isn't that right, Gabrielle?
Isn't that what Xena taught you?

Right.

Damon and his men won't
be satisfied...

...till they've picked
this place clean.

Now, if you want a future,
we have to stop them now.

Run along, Gabrielle.

This is a decision for the whole
village, not an outsider.

Hold it! In case you hadn't
noticed, this is Gabrielle.

My sister. This is her village.

And if you people were smart,
you'd realize that Xena...

...has taught her more about
the warrior arts...

...than you'll ever know
about anything.

Damon's men
have cleared the woods.

They're heading straight for us!

Come on, we've gone this far.

Let's give these sons of griffens
a welcome they'll never forget.

-Now, what do you say?
-Yeah!

You want food? Here! Take it!

Yes!

Yes!

Boys!

Give me some of that!

Now!

Hey, mead breath!

Get them!

Yes!

We did it!

Have we done it? Have we beaten them?

No. They've gone to regroup.

Listen! We surprised them once,
but they won't fall for it twice.

Regroup? This is madness,
we can't possibly win.

I'm going to Damon
to offer our surrender...

-...before we're slaughtered.
-No, you can't!

-Listen! There's gotta be...
-You fools!

You let women, children and
old men kick your behinds!

Now, take this village or
die by my blade.

Front line form!

And move!

Hey, hydra-heads!

Am I glad to see you.

Pharis thought you took
the money and ditched us.

I needed the cash
to buy the javelins.

-Gabrielle knew you'd be back.
-That's why I'm here.

Fire!

All right, ladies, get out of here.
Let me do my job.

Move!

-I did it.
-Guess again.

Move or I'll slaughter her like
a sacrificial lamb.

I swear it.

All right. Let's go.

-Oh, my foot! It's asleep!
-Well, wake it up fast!

Ok. Maybe this'll help.

You're real tough with the girls.

Why don't you try
someone your own size?

Hey! Look, I'm sorry, ok?

Can't blame a man for trying.

Act, don't react.

...Sure, there were a few
tense moments...

...but I never had a doubt
that we could do it.

A dinar for your thoughts.

Don't waste your money.

Then I'll tell you.

You love this village. Love
your family, your friends...

But you have to leave
and you don't know how to tell us.

It's not just that.

Lila, I wanna be a part of your life.

A day didn't go by that I didn't think
of you, and I missed you terribly.

You're dreams are elsewhere.

Gabrielle, you are destined
for great things.

Your heart belongs on the road.
Not here in this little village.

If you stay here, your
life will never be complete.

Live life, Gabrielle. Don't
let it pass you by.

I thought I was the
only oracle in the family.

It doesn't take an oracle to realize
that you belong out there in the world...

...with Xena.

Helping to change people's lives
for the better, like you did here.

You knew all along, didn't you?

Yep.

You're my sister, and I love you
more than anything.

Don't forget to visit us, ok?

You can count on it.

Well, well, well...
We meet again.

I guess you would call
this a little rock and roll.

You're not so brave
without your well-muscled friend, are you?

Last time we did this...

...you and your friend chose
to fight, rather than submit.

Care to rethink your decision?

Not again!

Xena!

When did you get here?

In time to see you vault that
cart. Gutsy move...

That was gutsy, huh? I didn't freeze.

No, you didn't.

Did you find the answers you were looking for?

Yeah, I did.

You know, it's kind of funny, don't you think?

That we should just run into each other,
I mean, here.

Not really. I was on my way to
Potadeia just to see how things were going.

Really?

So you like that move, huh?

-Yeah, it was all right.
-All right?

Well, I could teach it to ya.

Subtitles: @marlonrock1986 (^^V^^)