Worzel Gummidge (2019–…): Season 1, Episode 1 - The Scarecrow of Scatterbrook - full transcript

John. Look.

Massive flock of crows.

You might enjoy this.

It's not supposed to be
a punishment,

just a change of scenery.

Scatterbrook. Nearly there.

Well, I'm looking forward to it.

It's... It's a murder.

What's that?

It's a murder of crows.

Not a flock.



Not much of a welcome.

They expecting you?

Think so.

Well...

..good luck.

Now what?

CRASHING

Hello?

Mr Braithwaite?

We've been sent.

From the foster home.

You should have got a letter.

I'm Susan.

This is my brother John.



Reenie!

Oh!

Look what they've sent us!

Hello, my dears!

Sorry I wasn't here to meet you.
I was making up your room.

"Willing farm hands!"
it says in the letter -

with an exclamation mark.

Oh, pipe down, Henry.

They always put that, it's a joke!

Oh, ha!

Have you come as something, dear?

Pardon?

Your costume?

Well, they're not
going to be any help,

so they'd better not be any trouble.

He's just worried.

He wasn't bothered about having kids
come to stay this year.

There's too much on his plate.

The harvest is late,
none of the crops are ready.

So you'll have to stay
out of his way.

We'll try and find
something for you to do.

Is there a Wi-Fi code?

A what fi what?

A Wi-Fi code.

A why what-what?

Doesn't matter.

Maybe you can throw
stones at the crows.

How does that sound?

Terrific. You can start tomorrow.

Right. In we go.

This way.

That's it.

He doesn't even want us here!

She said he wasn't bothered.

That's different,
that's an improvement.

I'm tired of being a nuisance,
everywhere we go.

You said this was
going to be different.

It will be.

Honestly, I think this will be good,

and if we make ourselves useful,
who knows?

Maybe we WON'T have to go back.

She thought you were in fancy dress.

Shut your mouth.
"What have you come as?"

Shut your mouth! You're not exactly
dressed for life on the farm.

Look at that.

Weird.

Yeah, creepy.

No, I mean, I saw it earlier,
from the car,

but not here.

It must have been a different one.

You want to see?

Hm.

It's the same one.

Same coat.

I like him.

Did you see that? A bird!

Yeah, a robin.

There must be a nest in there.

BIRDS TWEETING

Yeah, chicks.

It's like his heart.

Cover them up, they'll get scared.

That'll be us tomorrow.

Scaring crows.

Oh!

Oh, that made me jump.

Let's go.

See you later.

Look after those chicks.

Oh-arr!

DOOR SLAMS

What are you doing?

I can't...

I don't know how to light this.

Oh! I thought it was...

It's this new-fangled electricity.

You'll get used to it.

I did see that scarecrow
from the cab,

and I can prove it
because I filmed it.

Where's my phone?

Have you got it?

Why would I have it?

Phone it with yours.

RINGING TONE

MOBILE PHONE RING TONE

RING TONE CONTINUES

PHONE BLEEPS

Out of battery. You got a charger?

You packed the charger.

Tell me you packed the charger.

Oh, no!

What are we going to do?

We'll survive.

It'll be like the olden days,
like the '90s or something.

I did see it. I'm not lying.

I never said you were. Go to sleep.

HE SIGHS

HE BLOWS

Oh.

CRASHING

HE YAWNS

CRASHING

Phone charger,
phone charger, come on.

DOOR HANDLE RATTLES

Argh! Argh!

What are you doing, standing there
in the dark

with your eyes wide open?

You made me jump.

COUGHING UPSTAIRS

I found your musical box.

You left it in the corn.

I heard it.

Thanks...

I dropped it, I'm afraid.

Three times in total.

How...

..do you...

..walk?

I puts one foot in front
of the other, same as you.

Nice to have you here.

Good to have some extra hands.

They're putting you up indoors,
are they?

Yeah.

Unconventional
but, still, dry lodgings.

Prevents the mildew.

Matter of fact, there was
something I wanted to ask you.

Something playing on my mind.

OK.

It's probably nothing
to be concerned about

but, well, I won't
burden you with it now,

it can wait till the morrow
when you've rested up a bit.

Shall we meet in the field
next to the God cake?

Um...

What time? Any time?

See you then.

Actually, better make it half past.

Wait!

What's your name?

Oh, good guff, where are my manners?
I's Worzel Gummidge.

Welcome to Scatterbrook.

DOOR SLAMS

COCKEREL CROWS

What? Are you all right?

Hurry up, I want to get out there.

It looks like a lovely day.

Are you being sarcastic?

No.

Looks like a lovely day?

You are not going to believe
what happened last night.

Oh.

Now, you'll have to amuse
yourselves today.

And stay out of his way, the farmer,
he'll like as not be in a foul mood.

Worse than yesterday?

OK, listen, this is
going to sound weird,

but that scarecrow came here last
night and brought back my phone.

His name is Worzel Gummidge

and he said that we have to meet him
today at the field by the God cake.

He acted as if he knew who I was,
like he was expecting us.

Well?

Say something.

What's a God cake?

That's your question?

What about the scarecrow coming
alive and talking bit?

I didn't believe that bit,
like you said I wouldn't.

Mrs Braithwaite, what's a God cake?

A God cake? Where did you hear that?

Heard somebody say it.

Well, God Cakes are...

You know those small
triangles of grass

where three country lanes meet?

So when the carts had to
make wide turns,

they left these little islands
in the middle.

Are there any near here?

There's one up where
Scatterbrook Lane meets Birchwood,

up the top, past Ten Acre Field.

SHE SIGHS

It doesn't prove anything.

Well, I can't have just made up
that God cake thing, can I?

I don't know.

Where are you going? It's this way.

You have to come
and meet Worzel Gummidge.

John, I'm not playing scarecrows.

OK? I don't want to play.

It's not a game.

I'm no good at improvisation.

I'm not making it up!

OK, it isn't here.

Well...

He didn't say ON the God cake,
he said in the field next to it.

There it is.

Where?

Told you.

Come on.

Um, hello?

So my brother here reckons that...

There you are!

I was looking the wrong way.

It was only a 50-50 chance,
that way or that way,

and I chose the wrong one.

You're late - I thought
we said half past.

No matter, I'm used to waiting.

I had a conversation
with a chaffinch.

He was filling me in about
some stale buns in the bins

outside the bakers.

Well, this is slightly awkward.

Is there anything I can do to make
this easier for you?

My name, as I told you last night,
is Worzel Gummidge...

..and your name is?

Susan.

Susan, a very boring name -

hopefully I'll be able to
remember it.

And? John. John.

The most boring name of all.

I'll definitely remember that one.
Ha-ha!

You said last night
you had something to ask us.

I did, yes.

And you've probably
guessed what it is

and you were most likely going to
ask me the same.

So I'll answer.

Yes, I am.

You are what?

Worried.

What are you worried about?

Same as you.

The weather.

Something's up.

The leaves aren't turning,
the blackberries aren't ripening.

These boys and girls should have
fledged a month back,

but they're showing no inclination -
no inclination at all.

Where are the geese?
Why aren't they flying south-ways?

Mrs Braithwaite was
talking about it,

the crops and the harvest are late.

Look, I found this in me hanky.

What is it?

It's a knot.

So...?

Well, I put it in there
to remind me of something.

What?

I've forgotten.

But I'm sure it's to do
with the weather.

I can't help feeling

that whatever the problem is,
it's up to us to fix it.

Us?

I don't think we're
who you think we are.

Oh, no, no, I knows
who you are, all right.

Soon as I saw you.

True, you don't expect to see
scarecrows riding in cars

nor sleeping indoors,
but the clothes.

Give-away.

Absolute triumph.

I know I'm a natty dresser,

but I've never seen such a jumble
of ill-fitting, odd-ball clothes

so unsuited to the countryside.

I knows who you are.

Sorry, what? We're not scarecrows.

Of course you are. Look at you.

No, we're not.

I'm a boy, she's a girl.

Not scarecrows?

No, sorry.

But...not humans?

Yeah, I mean, yeah, we're humans.

What have I done?

HE GASPS

Oi! What are you doing with that?

What is even going on?
What is happening?

That belongs in Ten Acre Field.

Don't worry. We won't tell him.

As if I haven't got enough to do

without chasing scarecrows
around the countryside.

We didn't take him.

Oh, right, must have walked
here by itself, then.

What, so they can do that?

I was being funny.

Oh.

Ha.

Careful with him.

There's a nest in his pocket.

Eh?

Well, I never -
so there is. Sparrows?

Robins.

Are they now?
And why are you still in the nest?

Why are they? Why is everything
so late, Mr Braithwaite?

I don't know.

All I do know is, if I can't
get these crops in soon,

I'll lose it all.

The harvest?

Well, come on, then!

Help me get it back
where it belongs.

Worzel, he's gone.

You can wake up now.

How does this even work?

I don't know, but I don't care.

It's brilliant.

It's all right, Worzel,
we'll come back tomorrow

and I'll have a think
about the whole weather problem.

So you rest up,
we'll come back tomorrow.

Come on.

COWS LOW
Walk on, come on!

That's it, hey, come on, now!

You can do me a favour this morning.

You take this bag down to one
of the charity shops in the village.

There's more than one?

There's eight.

Eight charity shops?

Cats' home, dogs' home, cancer,
dementia, homeless,

hedgehogs, homeless hedgehogs
and the hard of hearing.

All right, Worzel? How's it going?

Was just going to say,

we're heading down to the charity
shop, dropping off this bag.

Yeah, bag of old clothes.

All the colours of the rainbow.

All the colours of the rainbow.

Was wondering if you wanted to
have a quick look through.

See if there's anything you fancy.

Oven gloves?

Probably not.

Ooh, some slippers!

A slipper?

What about this?
One of those posh neck-scarves?

Yeah?

I bet you'd look brilliant in this,
like a gentleman.

What do you reckon, John?

Oh, really classy.

What's that, silk?
That looks like silk.

Oh! That's not fair.

How do yous know I've always
had a craving for a cravat?

A cravat.

That's it!

Soon as I saw you, I thought,

"There's a scarecrow that would suit
a stylish piece of neck-wear."

Well, you're not wrong there.

You knows as well as I do
what an 'andsome figure I'd cut

in a neckerchief,
and you've used it against me -

you've tricked me into talking to
human beings for the second time.

Third. Third.

It wasn't a trick.

Here, it's yours.

I aren't got no money.

It's on us, if you let us help
with the weather problem.

Help you remember what you forgot.

Throw in the oven gloves
and you've got yourselves a deal.

How old are you?

I'm all manner of ages.

My head is one age,
and my feet are another

and so on and so forth.

It's usual with scarecrows,
but I don't mind.

Means I get lots of birthdays.

Who made you?

The Green Man made me -
same as made all the scarecrows.

And if he finds out I've been
talking to 'umans,

he won't be impressed.

How do you do that thing?
The playing-dead thing?

Oh, a sulk, we calls it.

It's a knee-jerk reaction.

So you can't help it?

A sulk is a bit like a sneeze -
sometimes you can stop 'em,

if you concentrate. Most of the
time, they just sneak up on you.

Do you eat food?

Of course I eat food.

What else am I going to eat?

But where does it go?
You haven't got any insides.

I shouldn't think
too hard about it -

you'll find a lot of things
don't add up.

So has the weather ever
done this before?

Oh, aye.

You remember the dreadful
winter of 1963?

Of course I don't, I'm 12.

Or the long, hot summer of '76?

12.

It happened then,
the countryside was in crisis.

The problem is, each part of me has
been replaced at least twice.

I haven't had any bit long enough
to remember how to fix it.

Is there anyone older than you?

Nobody as I've got any
inclination to speak to.

I haven't been to visit for so long,
she won't be happy.

She always was a miserable
old trout.

That's why I stopped visiting.

Who is it?

Aunt Sally.

My poor mum's 'orrible sister.

A scarecrow?

Not a scarecrow, no.

An Aunt Sally is a
fairground attraction -

a wooden woman
what they used to set up

and people'd pay a penny
to throw sticks at it.

You'd get a prize
if you hit her in the head.

Oh. I know, dreadful.

Well, you can't go round throwing
sticks at women these days,

I don't care what anybody says.

So my Aunt retired
and now she's in the museum.

Oh, well, that's better.

Trouble is,
she's become unbearable with it.

Thinks she's the Queen of Sheba.

What?

You shouldn't do that, you know.

It's bad for you.

Will your Aunt remember?

Oh, she never forgets nothin',

specially if I was to blame.

She's like one of them animals
what never forgets.

What are those animals
what never forgets?

Doesn't matter.
You need to see your Aunt Sally.

Oh, no.

No, this might be good -
less people around.

You're right, I got a plan.

You two go in and make a nuisance
of yourselves.

Those are going in the end gallery,
are they? For now?

Hello? Can I help?

We're closed, I'm afraid,

for refurbishment, didn't you see
the sign?

No.

What's this a museum of?

Local history.

That's the best kind.

We're closed.

What's the oldest thing
you've got here?

The fossils, probably, but...
How old are they?

Well, some of them
are 300 million years old.

Shut up.

Pardon? How old is this?

That's my telephone.

How old is it?

Oh, my goodness.
I do beg your pardon.

Hello?

Aunt Sally?

Is that you?

Urgh!

Argh! Aunt Sally?

It's me, Worzel.

I don't know anyone called Worzel.

Your nephew, Worzel.

I don't have a nephew.

Oh, Auntie.

Don't be like that.
I'm sorry I haven't been to visit.

Huh! Stand up straight.

You're very thin. Are you ill?

No.

Have you got a girlfriend?

Um... Tuck your shirt in!

Auntie, I'm thin
because I'm made of sticks,

it's none of your business whether
I've got a girlfriend or no,

and I can't tuck my shirt in
because I aren't wearing one.

Please listen, I need your help.

There's something wrong with
the weather.

Something's up.

I tied a knot in my hanky to remind
me to fix it, but I forgot how.

Do you know what's going on?

You mean, why are
the seasons locked?

Are they?

"Are they?" he asks.
Isn't it obvious?

We're stuck in mid-summer
and nothing's moving on.

Muddy boots!

Language.

Is it true that the Tudors
threw their poo out the window?

Was it Einstein that was
killed by an apple?

When exactly was 1066?

Where are your parents?

You sell bookmarks.

You're right.

The seasons are all locked up,

just as they were that long,
cold winter.

What do I do? How do I unlock them?

To unlock something, you need a key.

I aren't got a key.

Lost it, of course.

Why am I not surprised?

I don't think I ever had a key.

You always were a flighty-by-night.

A what? A dilly-dally-doodler.

Pardon?
A Jack-me-which-me-where-me-what.

Where do I find the key
and what do I do with it?

You seem to forget, Worzel,

that I'm not a scarecrow,
I'm an Aunt Sally.

I don't understand your
scarecrow hocus pocus.

I stayed very well away
on that night.

So you do remember?

Whenever scarecrows gather,
there's bound to be trouble.

A scarecrow gathering always ends
in pandemonium.

A gathering.

That's it!

I need the other scarecrows.

One of them will have the key.
You'll have to hurry.

If they're not here by harvest moon,
it'll have to wait another month.

Harvest moon.

Of course!

Oh, my hat, that's tomorrow.

Aunt Sally, you are a wonder.

Don't be soft. You are.

You're a Duchess.

I have to dash,
but I'll come back and visit.

And I'll bring you a present -
what do you need?

Big tin of varnish! Mwah.

Aunt Sally, you are...

CRASH!

..priceless.

What did she say? Did she remember?

The seasons are locked.

I should have guessed -

there's been no rain for weeks,
but the corn's still lush and green.

What do you do?

Well, there's a key to unlock them.

I'll have to send a message
to the Scarecrows of Albion.

I'll have to journey to
The Tree of Tree.

The what of what, pardon?

There's a tree, a ancient tree.

Every breeze and every
breath of wind

passes through that tree

on the way to wherever
it needs to go.

They calls it...

..the Tree of Tree.

That's what it's called?

Yep.

Where is it?

Far, far away.

Like, over the sea? Not that far.

Scotland? Not that far, no.

A train journey away?

You could probably walk it.

So not that far away, then?

Yeah, but it doesn't sound
so mysterious, does it?

To say there's this magical tree
really close by.

Where is it exactly?

Supermarket car park
on Umsdale Road.

Let's go.

Remind me again how this tree,
in a supermarket car park,

is going to help.

I tell my message to the tree
and the tree sends it off,

whispering on the breezes
and ringing in the rain

until all have heard
who needs to hear.

Oh, dear.

Is this it?

Oh, aye, this is her.

The Tree of Tree.

One of the three Trees of Tree.

And she don't look well.

What's wrong?

Well, look at her.

She's all clogged up with jellyfish.

Those aren't jellyfish,
they're plastic bags.

Look the same to me.

Look the same to turtles too,
when they end up in the oceans.

I don't see what's wrong with
a basket, meself.

Least they can't fly.

Well...

How can we clear it?
Can you climb it?

With these limbs?

I'd be inextricably tangled
before you could say,

"Actually, Gummidge, perhaps this
wasn't such a good idea."

Wait a minute.

You can talk to the birds.

Affirmative.

Well, then, ask the crows if they'll
clear the bags out of the tree.

What did you do that for?

Do what?

Slap me round the face?

I didn't.

Felt like somebody just
slapped me round the face.

Are you suggestin' that I,
Worzel Gummidge,

the Scarecrow of Scatterbrook,
make a deal with the crows?

Can't you just call a truce
for one day?

I'd sooner strike a deal
with the spadgers.

I aren't got no beef with
the spadgers.

What are spadgers?

Little brown jobs. Sparrows?
That's what I said.

Sparrows are too small.

And there aren't enough of them.

It would take them a year.

The crows could just rip all these
bags out of the tree in no time.

Make a deal with me archenemies.

You know it makes sense,

so swallow your pride
and speak to the crows.

Where's Winter George?

Who's Winter George?

ROBIN CHEEPS

I know. I'm not happy
about it either,

but these chillens
reckon it's the only way.

You go and tell 'em now.

Tell the rooks,
tell the crows what I said.

We'll be up presently.

CROWS CAW

I might...

I'm going to stay here,
guard the gate.

Good plan.

CROWS CAW

All right, which one of you
is the spokescrow?

Who am I dealing with?

CROW SQUAWKS

Evening.

Bred any good rooks lately?

Bred any good rooks.

Tough crowd.

All right.

I knows I've scared
you all in the past,

and I will again, to be sure.

I know I've called you
a feathered plague,

and wished you all electrified
on the telegraph wires.

CROWS CAW LOUDLY

Careful, Gummidge,
they're getting annoyed.

I know I've called your mothers
bandy-legged ostriches,

and your dads a bunch of penguins.

But... But I want you to forget
about all that and do us a favour.

CROW SQUAWKS LOUDLY

Why not? I did ask nicely!

I did say please!

I'm not saying it again
cos I've already said it!

Can I...? Worzel...

Can I speak to them?

I think you're being a bit...

I think you need
to flatter them a bit.

Good luck with that.

Um, hello.

I'm Susan.

Nice to meet you.

CROW SQUAWKS

What did it say?

Look, I know that Worzel has
scared you over the years,

but that's what he's made for -
he can't help it.

And what we're asking for
will benefit us all.

It will benefit the whole world.

CROW SQUAWKS
Says it's not enough.

Says they want paying.

Paying with what?
CROW SQUAWKS

Guns.

Guns?!

CROW SQUAWKS

And cash. Guns and cash.

Can I just say,
I don't think that would be wise?

Rooks with guns,
potentially dangerous.

Look, we haven't got any guns,
and even if we did, be serious -

come on, something that we can
actually get.

CROW SQUAWKS
Bag of grain.

OK.

That's more like it.

Can we do that?

Aren't no grain.
Not till the harvest comes.

There, you'll be paid
when the job's done.

If we can get the seasons moving
and the harvest to come,

that's when you'll get your
bag of grain.

CROW SQUAWKS
And a chainsaw.

Don't push your luck.

CROW SQUAWKS

All right, you maniacs!
Get off! Get lost!

WINGS FLAP

Wah! Get away with you.

You'll get your bag of grain!

Would you look at that?

They've only bloomin' done it!

Was that my idea?

If you like.

Send to all scarecrows
a wake-up alarm.

Tell them to gather at
Scatterbrook Farm.

The seasons are locked
and we're missing the key.

If one of you's got it,
then bring it to me.

Up roots, hurry westward,
all will be revealed

by the light of the full moon
in Ten Acre Field.

# Oh, the sun shines bright

# And the corn grows high

# And the crows
are gathering in the sky

# And the scarecrow sees

# And the scarecrow knows

# How the seasons change
and the seasons roll

# Oh, scare 'um, scare 'um

# Don't you know?

# The scarecrow sees
and the scarecrow knows. #

BIRDS SING

Oh! Was it a dark wash
or a light wash?

And it's all gone?

Can he wear his Wednesday pants?

What about his Friday pants?

What, all of them?!

Well, I would say he could
borrow a pair of Henry's

but, no, I don't think he'd be keen.

Well, listen, I'll keep an eye out.

Yeah, all right, then.

Cheerio. Cheerio.

Oh!

Who was that?

Ethel Parsons.

All her washing's gone.

Stolen.

She left it out because
there was a brisk wind

and, this morning, gone.

You two know anything about this?

No.

Wasn't us.

Hm.

It's them, the scarecrows,
they're here.

Psst.

Worzel, what are you doing here?

What a night.

Absolute pandemonium,
just as Aunt Sally predicted.

Here, can you deal with this?

What is it? Stolen clothes.

What am I supposed to do with them?

Take the blame?

Let's get out of here,
Mr B's already suspicious.

They started
arriving around midnight.

Trampling over gardens,
stealing washing,

I had to gather 'em all up

and send 'em up to the woods
to wait.

But there's a problem.

What?

None of 'em's got the key.

None of 'em even knows
what it looks like.

So what are you going to do at
harvest moon?

Well, that's the problem.
I don't know!

You've got to think, Worzel.

I know.

What's a good way of concentrating?

Here.

Worzel! No!

Oi!

It's not what it looks like.

Don't even try, I'm not stupid.

We didn't...
I said, I don't want to hear.

Go pack your bags,
you're leaving tomorrow.

No!

Don't send us back,
we didn't take it, I promise.

Where are you going with that?

Ten Acre Field.

That corn's not going to ripen
so I'll cut it for straw.

You can't.

It'll all be fixed by tomorrow.
ENGINE TURNS OVER AND CUTS

Oh, what now?

Where did you get that?

It's mine, I dropped it.

Where did you find this?

I didn't steal it
off the washing line.

I've seen this before.

When I was a boy.

Where?

This very pattern,
and I'll never forget it.

It had been the harshest winter
anyone could remember.

It was like we were stuck in winter.

There was one last, heavy snowfall
at the end of February

and the next morning - this...

..was drawn, in huge circles,
across the fresh snow...

..right across Ten Acre Field.

Who did it?

Never found out.

And no sooner had it appeared,
than the weather turned,

thaw set in, and the snow melted
away within a day.

But I'll never forget this pattern.

Now, I don't know what's going on
or where you got this,

but I haven't got time to find out
what you're up to.

Go pack your things.

I'll take you to the station
in the morning.

Go on, go!

Pst!

Worzel, look. Let me see that.

No wonder I tied a knot,
to stop me blowing me nose on it.

This is the answer.

We've got to do this pattern
in Ten Acre Field,

but in the corn instead of the snow.

Won't the scarecrows go into a sulk
when they see me and Susan?

Oh, don't worry,
I've told 'em you're coming,

I told 'em you're a special type of
city scarecrow with stupid names.

Thanks. Do you know them all?

Oh, aye, though there might be
a couple of new faces.

And are they all right?

Utterly insane, the lot of 'em.

No wonder, really -
out in all weathers,

ravaged by rooks and ravens.

They have a tendency to get
over excited

and start pulling bits off each
other for a laugh.

Wait!

But you told them
we don't come apart, right?

What do you mean,
you don't come apart?

LAUGHTER

Muddy boots...

It's anarchy.

Here.

Wait here.

Here he is. It's Worzel.

Three hips for Worzel Gummidge -
hip, hip...

ALL: Here!

This way, you nutters.

You're in the wrong field.
Follow me.

I got the plans drawed
on this hanky.

Ay-up, scarecrow.

You're looking wind-swept
and sun-bleached.

I heard you got struck by lightning.

Three times now.

Congratulations, old horse.

Here. What are you doing?

He said I've got mice.

Well, he has. And termites.
All up his legs.

Well, you're not
going to get anywhere

fighting about it like that. No?

No. You need two planks.

One plank each.
Oh, I'll get another one.

No time now.

This way, chillens!

Everyone, these are the scarecrows
I was telling you about.

City folk.

Don't try and remember their names,
you'll never do it.

Too few syllables.

Come on!

OWL HOOTS

ALL TALK AT ONCE

Gather round, gather round
and settle down.

I need a flat surface,
a level surface.

Ooh! Can I help?

Flat Alastair.

Ideal, much obliged.

Here, Gummidge, Gummidge,
I made up a joke for you.

You'll like this.

What's the difference between
a lemon and a banana?

I don't know.

What's the difference
between a lemon and a banana?

They're both yellow.

LAUGHTER

They're both yellow!

All right, we've got
to be serious for a minute.

Scarecrows of Albion.

Welcome to Scatterbrook...

They're both yellow.

LAUGHTER

All right.

That was a good one, but there'll
be time for jokes later,

after the work's done.

The harvest moon is rising,
my friends,

and we've got a job to do.

We've got to do this...

..out there in the corn.

All right?

Is that clear?

Um, it's quite complicated.

I was thinking that
when you put it together...

It's intricate. Very intricate.

Well, we did it all
before in the snow.

Does nobody remember
how it was done?

What about the shape?

The teardrop shape?

It looks like a key.

What key?

A key from a tree.

What tree?

The trees with the keys
that spin upon the breeze.

The sycamore keys?

From the sycamore trees?

It looks like a key.

What key?

A key from a tree.

What tree?

The trees with the keys that spin
upon the breeze.

The sycamore keys...
From the sycamore trees.

The sycamore trees are the only
trees with keys on it.

Seems to me that there
has to be a reason.

And I've a funny feeling
it's the changing of the season,

does everyone agree about the key?

ALL: Yes, everyone agrees about
the key.

RAPS: # It looks like a key

# What key?

# A key from a tree

# What tree?

# The sycamore keys
from the sycamore trees

# The sycamore keys
from the sycamore trees?

# It looks like a key

# What key?

# A key from a tree

# What tree?

# The sycamore keys
from the sycamore trees... #

WHISPERS: The trees with the keys
that spin on the breeze.

The trees with the keys
that spin on the breeze.

The trees with the keys
that spin on the breeze.

The trees with the keys
that spin on the breeze.

The trees with the keys
that spin on the breeze.

# The trees with the keys
that spin upon the breeze

# The trees with the keys
that spin upon the breeze

# The trees with the keys
that spin upon the breeze

# The trees with the keys
that spin upon the breeze... #

LAUGHTER

WHOOPING

COCKEREL CROWS

Hello? Anybody here?

Do you remember coming back
last night?

No.

I remember laying down in the grass
and closing my eyes for a minute.

Same.

What time is it?

Look.

Our bags.

CAR HORN BEEPS

Come on. Hurry up, leave the bags -
you won't be needing them.

I thought we were going to
the station.

You said we were going back.

It seems like I owe you an apology.

Mrs Parsons said she saw the person
what stole her washing

and it wasn't either of you.

Oh. You didn't see any
strangers hanging about?

BOTH: No.

Anyway, come on, jump in.

There's something I want you to see.

# Oats and beans and barley grow

# As you and I
and everyone know... #

Look at that.

# Oats and beans
and barley grow... #

Can I have some help in the orchard?

# As you and I and everyone know

# Waiting for the harvest

# First the farmer sows his seed

# Then he stands and takes his ease

# He stamps his feet
and claps his hands

# And turns around to view the land

# Waiting for the harvest... #

CROW SQUAWKS
You can say that again.

Just in the nick of time.

CROW SQUAWKS
Oh-aye.

Fingers crossed.
CROW SQUAWKS

What? What's their names?
The chillens?

Oh, they'll be staying for a while,
help with the harvest.

Farmers have taken a shine to 'em.

If I'm honest, I have, too.

They're good kids,
if a bit eccentric.

I'll see they stay out of trouble
and mischief.

Have you finished your grain now?
Enjoy that, did you?

Smashing.

Get off my land, then.

CROW SQUAWKS

I'm sorry, did I not
make myself clear?

Did you think we were friends now?

Far from it, pal.

Nothing personal,
it's just the way things are.

The clue's in the name.

Worzel Gummidge,
the Scarecrow of Scatterbrook.

And I'll give you five seconds to
get your greasy talons off my chalk.

Five.

Four.

Three...

# Oh, the sun shines bright

# And the corn grows high

# And the crows
are gathering in the sky

# And the scarecrow sees
and the scarecrow knows

# How the seasons change
and the seasons roll

# Oh, scare 'um, scare 'um
Don't you know?

# The scarecrow sees
and the scarecrow knows... #