Wiseguy (1987–2009): Season 1, Episode 14 - Player to Be Named Now - full transcript
When Mel's former girlfriend shows up, begging for readmission to the Inner circle, he humiliates her, using her as a sexual pawn in a power game with a rival, but for Vinnie, forced to watch it happen, the worst is yet to come.
- [Narrator]
Tonight on Wiseguy--
- Don't you just love the
crackle of an open fire?
Kind of reminds me of
Christmas time at Grandma's.
(smashing)
- You sleep with
him if you have to,
but don't fall in love with him.
- It'll be a hell of a storm.
Just don't know whether it's
gonna be rougher out there,
or in here.
- Push her off the boat!
- No.
- You don't seem to
understand, Vinnie.
You don't have a choice.
- You're wrong, Mel!
- You don't think
I'll kill you, do you?
(hard-hitting
orchestrated music)
- [Roger] Ever tell
you what my favorite
time of the year is?
- [Vinnie] No, but
I wish you would.
I'm sure it'd make
life worth living.
- Oh, this gig getting to you?
- You know what, you wake me
up in the middle of the night,
you pull me out of a dream
that's worth at
least 10 Hail Marys,
it's the third time this month,
you tell me there's a
bomb on Mel's yacht.
(Roger laughs)
Maybe it is getting
to me a little bit.
- My favorite time of year is
anytime Mel's depressed.
Did you know, three or
four days, maybe a week,
he'll be lying in his bed,
covers over his head,
paralyzed because he can't
decide what shirt to put on!
The only trouble with
Mel's depressions is
that he comes out of them.
- You mean, like now?
- Exactamente!
He still thinks that
half the civilized world
is conspiring against him.
- Well, if it's just paranoia
then what are we doing here?
- Suppose he's right.
There's gonna be a 100
people on this boat
day after tomorrow,
among them my most favorite
person in the whole wide world.
- How many times
you swept this tub?
- Oh, more times
than I can count.
- And how many bombs
have you found?
- None.
Until now.
(grave music)
Ever think about how
you're gonna die?
- Yeah, always hoped
it'll be old age.
What do you think of this?
- I don't know.
Might be a timer,
or a trembler switch.
I don't want to take
a chance on moving it.
(sighs) It's no timer.
I don't see any
wires in the tape.
Course they could be
using microcircuitry.
Those wires are tenth
the size of a human hair.
Damn near invisible.
(sighs)
(hard breathing)
(sighs)
(sighs)
Okay.
Now, when I remove the lid,
if there's no tripwire
inside and we're still alive,
I want you to shine
a light inside,
so I can see the detonator.
(ominous music)
- Here's to adrenaline.
Nectar of the gods, Mel.
That son a bitch!
(Door knocks)
- [Man] Vinnie!
- All right!
What?
- Hey! How you doing Vinnie?
What you been up to?
- Oh, not too much, Mel.
Just watching my life
flash before my eyes,
while Roger was taking
apart your phony bomb.
- (snickers) So you found it.
Good. I'm glad.
I was worried that security
had been slacking off.
- Mm-hmm.
- You got to admit,
I'm fun to be around.
- Good night, Mel.
- (chuckles) There's
nothing like palpable death
to get the old juices flowing.
Exhilarating and terrifying
at the same time.
It's kind of like
love, I suppose.
Don't be mad.
I don't want you to be.
Now put your sneaks on, we're
gonna go hit a few balls.
Wade Boggs' mound.
- Mel, it's four
o'clock in the morning!
- Well, this place has lights.
- I'm sure it's closed.
- Well, ordinarily, yeah.
But I gave the guy 10 grand so--
it's open.
Show him the heat!
Yeah!
That's solid Vinnie!
Come on, come on!
(baseball cracks)
Hey, you know, you look
good in double knits.
- I was raised in 'em.
(giggles)
- Hey, Bobbie, remind
me to thank you later
for letting us in
the locker room!
Come on, come on,
come on, come on.
Oh yeah! We got a hitter here!
(giggles)
You played organized
ball, didn't you?
- Yeah, American Legion.
- Yeah, hot corner?
- No, I'm one of the
tools of ignorance.
- A catcher?
I can see it.
I can see you blocking the play
from those runners
coming in from third.
- Oh yeah?
See me in traction too?
(laughs)
- Alright, Bobbie, look alive!
Gonna have some rockets
coming back at you!
Come on, Bobbie!
- I hope Mel didn't take you
away from anything important.
(chuckles)
- I was alone, Susan.
Alright, Mel!
- That's a dinger!
400 yards over the left wall!
The crowd's going wild!
(mimics crowd roar)
- (chuckles) 400 yards?
- Come on, Mel, I'm
exhausted, let's go.
- Alright, well you go
wait in the car, honey.
We'll be done in a minute.
- So Mel, what
positions you play?
- We moved around too much.
We were never one place, so,
you know, there was
the sandlot stuff,
but, uh--
- Yeah.
(cracks)
- What I wanted
more than anything
was to wear a number on my
back, you know what I mean?
A big number seven,
just like The Mick.
Okay, last pitch!
Bottom of the ninth, two out,
full count, bases loaded.
There is no joy in Mudville.
You know,
I used to fall
asleep at the radio,
listening to the games
from Yankee stadium,
I could see Mantel
and Berra and Ford,
performing their magic.
God, it was as clear
as if I had box seats.
Those were the days, Vinnie.
Those were the days
heroes walked the earth.
I can't wait anymore.
I gotta tell ya.
- What?
- I'm gonna buy a team!
- What?
- Yeah, there's a new
franchise in Sacramento.
I'm gonna buy 'em, I'm
gonna buy this place too.
- Mel, we're in Vancouver.
- Yeah, I know, but I'm
gonna move 'em here.
That's why I've coming
out here nights.
I gotta get myself in shape!
- Mel, just 'cause
you own a team,
doesn't mean you could play.
- But you're wrong, Vinnie.
That's exactly what it means.
(laughs)
Thanks a lot, it
was a great fun.
- Is he serious about buying
a Sacramento franchise?
- When it comes to acquisitions,
Mel is always serious.
- Yeah, I know he
likes the game,
but why does he
wanna be an owner?
- The most important reason?
Because it's something
he doesn't have.
- Oh.
- Isn't that what we all want?
- What are the other reasons?
- Darling--
- Yeah?
- Friday night?
- The cruise?
I want you to deliver a guest.
- Who?
- Eddie Van Platt.
It's very important to Mel
that he'd be there, okay?
- Having fun kids?
(glasses shattering)
- Mel!
(shattering)
Stop it right now!
(glass shatters)
What is the matter with you!
- I can turn this place into
a junkyard in five minutes
and not you or anyone
else can stop me!
Everything here is mine,
and I can break it if I want to!
- Mel!
- Everything here is here
because it pleases me!
And it's here for as
long as it pleases me!
And when it stops pleasing me,
I'll get rid of it!
- Mel! You're breaking my neck!
(sighs)
- You're not falling in
love with him, are you?
Please tell me you aren't.
If you fall in love
him then I'd be alone.
I'd disappear.
We've known all of
this couldn't last.
We've always known it.
When you're standing
on top of Everest,
there's only one direction left.
Stay with me, Susie?
Until it's over?
- Mel.
I'm not going anywhere.
- You promise?
- Yeah.
- You know what happens
if you break your promise.
- Yeah, grow a very long nose.
- You sleep with
him if you have to,
but don't fall in love with him.
I couldn't bear that.
I couldn't.
- Smell it.
The city smells.
- Ah, it's fresh air, Frank.
You'll get used to it!
Just a matter of time!
- Time, I'll give you some time.
There's a three
hour time difference
between here and Atlantic city.
And the RD wants a
daily report file.
I call him, he's out to lunch.
He calls me back, I'm
grabbing a sandwich.
By the time I get back,
he's on the way home
and the next morning,
we start the whole thing all--
(jacket pops)
(sighs)
You know,
you pay $150 for a suit,
you expect the
buttons to stay on.
- That's why they sell
needles and thread, Frank.
Well, Frank, relax.
You know, it's just a button.
- It's not just a button.
We're talking about the
collapse of national pride here.
We've already lost
the auto industry.
Nobody in the States
can make a stereo,
and now, they can't
keep my buttons on!
- Frank, what's bugging ya?
- [Frank] Nothing!
- The hell's the
matter with Frank?
- Ah, he's grumpy.
So what's new among
the lifestyles of
the rich and vicious?
- Listen, you know
anything about a guy
named Eddie Van Platt?
- Yeah, a real estate magnate,
born with a silver
spoon in his mouth
that he's turned into
service for a thousand.
- Any indication that he did
any business with Profitt?
- I don't know of any.
I mean the guy's become a
legend in his spare time.
Builds condos, he's got
two shipping companies,
dog tracks in Florida,
a new franchise in the
American League, and--
- Wait a minute, wait a
minute, wait a minute.
He owns a baseball team?
- Yeah, in Sacramento I think.
- Profitt said he wanted
to buy that franchise.
- Well, all I know
is that Van Platt
is ready to break
ground with the stadium.
- May I interject a point here?
Who cares?
- Look, Frank, I'm supposed
to pick up this Van Platt guy
and bring him to Mel's
boat for a party on Friday.
Now, I wouldn't want to be the
guy that has what Mel wants,
you know what I mean?
- Hey, wait a minute.
And if Van Platt is
connected to Profitt,
and then you can get
him to turn over--
- No, no, what kind of carrot
am I gonna be able to dangle
if I don't even know he's dirty?
- Well, we'll find
something, Vince.
As I recall, the
third letter in FBI
stands for investigation.
Now you get on that boat,
you don't let Van Platt
out of your sight.
- Yeah, well, that's
gonna be tough Frank.
People at Mel's parties
tend to get naked in groups.
You know, from certain angles
they all look the same.
- Oh yeah?
- Well, I'll talk to Lococco.
Maybe he knows what Profitt
and Van Platt have going.
- Hello, Roger.
Jacqueline Devries?
I met you at the
Profitt's two summers ago?
In Montro?
- Ah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Did you and I have a thing
or were you with, Mel?
- Mel.
Thank you.
- Never expected
to see you again.
- [Jacqueline] I can tell by
the warmth of your greeting.
- A lot of faces go through
those revolving doors.
After awhile they--
- Look, I have to see him.
I have to see Mel.
- Oh, sweet thing.
You know the way it works.
When you're gone, you're gone.
You had your moment, it's over.
- Just take me to him, Roger.
- How important is it to you?
(chuckles)
- Everything is still a test.
- We all have our limits.
I would just like to
see what yours are.
(banging)
Meeting Mel was like
going into a toy store
for the first time, wasn't it?
Everything shiny, new.
And all you had to
do was reach out
and grab hold of
all the goodies.
Well, how long did it
take you to figure it out?
That the toy
was you?
(banging)
Lovely to look at!
(bangs)
Thrilling
to hold.
(bangs)
But nothing so useless as
a toy that's grown old.
(banging)
She's not an old
toy to you, is she?
Jacqueline, Vinnie!
Who knows?
Maybe she's still good
for a couple of laughs.
(concerning music)
(motorcycle revs)
- Roger's just your
basic all American boy.
Took a sharp right somewhere.
- Roger and I were new
in this thing together.
I'm surprised to hear
he was still around.
Mel and Susan usually clean
house every year or so.
What did you say
your name was again?
- Vinnie.
- Vinnie.
- I like Vincent
better, do you mind?
- Now look, why don't you
let me get you a hotel room?
You look beat.
- I'm not completely.
So, Vincent, how long
have you been around?
- Long enough to know the
players from the payers.
- Is there a difference?
- Jackie, come on,
you let that guy throw
those ball bearings six
inches from your head,
you never even flinched.
- He's either losing
his eye or his nerve.
He used to part people's
hair with those.
Do you ever wonder why
he does things like that?
- I wonder why people let him.
- DiStephana feels
that the gold market
presents an excellent
opportunity.
We have a fiscal possession of
200,000 ounces in the vaults
in London and The Hague.
- You make arrangements to
get Van Platt to the boat?
- Yes.
Vinnie's going to take him.
- Van Platt is such a smug
little bastard, don't you think?
He's got no idea what's coming.
No idea that I've known about
his treachery for two years.
- You have no proof
that Eddie Van Platt--
- The Mexican deal was mine!
Until he let Vazzina
and Calderon move in.
The proof is they're
moving the dust
into Texas and
Louisiana and I'm not!
My god Susan, am I the
only one that can see it?
Am I the only one who
isn't fooled and blinded
by treachery and selfishness?
I'm glad I didn't
have him killed
when I first
discovered the truth.
What a waste that would've been.
Did you get all the
names of the casinos
that have extended him credit?
- Yeah, Slater's working on it.
- I must have them
before we cruise.
Thanks, Mark.
(laughs)
An announcement will
be made within 48 hours
that the Department of
Defense is canceling
its jet fighter contract
with UniDAQ Industries.
It's some problem with
substandard parts.
- Where did they come from?
- Friends of ours.
Get Tony on the phone,
have him liquidate our
position immediately.
UniDAQ stock is all
gonna but disappear.
Which one do you like better?
- The pinstripes are nice.
- Yeah, they're
my favorites too.
You know why the
Yankees wear them?
- Mel, you haven't
had an hour of sleep
in four days.
- Because Babe Ruth got fat.
The owner knew that if you
put a fat man in pinstripes,
he's gonna look thinner.
So, it'll be pinstripes
for the home uniform.
Oh, and get Roger for
me, will you Susie?
There's something I want
him to do for me tonight.
(sighs)
Susie,
forgive me for shouting.
- Just the usual, I suppose.
New York at 16.
I lived with a photographer
who shot my covers.
Then Paris, then Geneva.
I almost married the grandson
of the last king of Italy.
- Didn't you go through with it?
- He was killed.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
- By a bottle of champagne.
We were making love
in his parent's villa,
and a magnum of
Dom Perignon fell,
and fractured his skull.
(snickers)
- I guess it beats getting
hit by a garbage truck.
- I wasn't in love
with him though.
But marriage seemed like
a good idea at the time.
I never told
anybody that before.
- So how'd you meet Mel?
- Oh, you know the
line from Casablanca?
Everybody comes to Rick's.
Well, I lived in
a world of glamor.
His was a world of wealth.
Worlds collide.
Beng with Mel was like
riding the tail of a comet.
- Yeah, but you
decided to leave.
And from what I've seen,
most people hang on
as long as they can.
- After one night
of particularly
strenuous depravity,
I looked in the mirror.
I didn't recognize myself.
You know, all my life,
I've been an ornament
for one man or another.
I just wanted to see if I could
live by myself, for myself.
Truth is, I can't.
I need the rush, Vincent.
I'm addicted to the life.
I have no choice.
- Come on.
There are only choices
you wanna make,
and choices you don't.
- When he's in the mood,
nobody lives like Mel Profitt.
And once you've lived with him,
the rest of the world seems
very dark and very cold.
- But you live too
close to the flame,
you're gonna get burned.
- But before you burn,
at least you get warm.
- Eight minutes 40 seconds.
Pathetic!
- The hell are you doing here?
- I've been looking for you.
I called you here,
you were gone.
Went back to my place and
the sweet thing was gone.
- You know you
could've killed her
with that ball bearing stunt.
- She's alive, isn't she?
- Yeah, but she's
hurt and scared,
and the last thing she needs
is be out of that circus
floating in the harbor.
- What do you think I
was trying to tell her?
Hope you two don't have any
early plans for tonight.
Mel's got a job for us.
- What is it?
- There's a construction
site on Beech and Lafayette.
Gonna be a condo
complex except it's not.
- What, we're gonna blow it?
- Too much noise
and I hate the dust.
So we're gonna
sing a torch song.
- For what?
- I forgot to ask.
Pick you up at 11:30.
Don't worry we won't be late.
She can light your fire
after we light this one.
(sighs)
- Agent 4587, day code,
USA entertainment,
box, nation, thriller.
- Well, how's it goin',
Sergeant Preston?
- Listen, I need McPike to
alert some uniform locals
to patrol the area around
Beech and Lafayette
tonight at midnight.
- Why uniforms?
- Profitt wants a
building torched
and Lococco and I are
gonna be the firebugs.
- Beech and Lafayette.
I got it Vinnie, we'll cover.
- So he says to her, "$100?
"$100?
"Since when does the price
include a $98 tip, huh?"
(chuckles)
(groans)
Alright, so I'm no comedian.
- Well, that I already know.
- This is McPike,
my watch says 11:55.
Alright, now, let's
nobody get antsy, girls.
Wait for him to get
inside the fence
and start futzing around first.
- Frank, what's going on?
Hey, you been snapping at me
for the past couple of days now!
So I figure,
you either read a book
about Pearl Harbor,
or you're homesick.
(chuckles and snorts)
- You have kids?
- Yeah.
- I have a boy.
Good boy.
He's in the school orchestra.
He plays the oboe.
School had a concert tonight.
It was his first concert.
And I missed it by 3,000 miles.
There'll never be a
first concert again.
I think he and I got
cheated out of a memory.
(car brakes)
(crickets chirp)
- What are we doing here, Roger?
Beech and Lafayette's
12 blocks from here.
- I know the city.
- This isn't even the place
we're suppose to torch.
- Yes, it is!
- Well, what was the
charade all about?
- I don't know.
Ask Mel.
- Perimeter units, have
you seen any activity?
- [Cop On Radio]
Unit Two, negative.
- [Another Cop On Radio]
Unit One, negative.
- This is real subtle Roger.
Why don't we just get some
napalm and really do the job?
- I believe the point
is being lost by you.
Mel wants to make sure
that even a blind man
could see this was arson.
Man, this place is gonna
go up like a rocket!
Plenty of time for you
and the sweet thing.
- Perimeter units, you
guys awake or what?
- [Cop On Radio] Nobody's
even walked past the fence.
It's dead out here.
(ominous music)
(fire booms)
- Eh, the last thing this
town needs is more condos.
Maybe Eddie will build a
playground for the kiddies.
- Eddie?
- Van Platt, one of
Mel's old associates.
Don't you just love the
crackle of an open fire?
Kinda reminds me of
Christmas time at grandma's.
- I don't like this, Kenny.
- Mel's meshuga.
I mean he probably
changed the whole deal.
Just call Lifeguard.
Vinnie's probably--
(sirens blaring)
(laughs)
- Hey! Morning pal!
- [Vinnie] Say, Mel.
- What do you think, huh?
- That looks good on you, Mel.
- It's a lot better
than the clown suits
we had on the other night.
Hey, hey!
Let it billow out a little
till I drop a few pounds.
The best.
- Oh yeah.
- Now you pick any
number you want.
Now, where do you think we
oughta have spring training?
I hate Florida, it's
only good for business.
How about, Arizona, New Mexico?
What do you think of Santa Fe?
- Yeah, sure.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Santa Fe.
Alright, enough!
- Thank you Mr. Profitt.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Very good job you and
Roger did last night.
Over three million
dollars damage.
I'm very impressed, Vinnie.
- I can't take credit
for this one, Mel.
Roger ran the show.
- But you learned something.
That's why I wanted
you to go along.
Every experience should
be a learning experience.
- Listen, do you remember
anybody by the name--
- Good morning.
- [Vinnie] Hi.
- Oh, you look so cute!
(kisses)
- You like it kid?
- Well, it has a
certain elegance.
Don't you think so, Vinnie?
- Oh yeah, that's definitely
the word I'd use, yeah.
- I'm looking forward
to seeing you in it.
Listen, I made plans
with Van Platt's people.
Vinnie and Roger are gonna
pick 'em up tonight at nine,
and take 'em
directly to the boat.
- Well, wait a minute, you
don't need the both of us
to pick up one guy.
- Eddie knows Roger, it'll
make him feel more comfortable.
Here you go, here's the address.
- Oh, Vinnie, you wanted
to ask me about something?
- Oh no, it's not important.
I'll see you tonight.
- Alright, try it on,
let me know how it fits.
- Okay Mel.
- I checked with the captain.
He's expecting
rough seas tonight.
- Perfect.
- Listen, Roger and I
are supposed to pick up
this guy tonight for the cruise.
His name's Eddie Van Platt.
- You're kidding?
After the way Mel carried
on about their Mexican deal?
- What, they were
business partners?
- Once.
Eddie owned a baseball
team down in Mexico.
He may still own it.
He used it to bury cocaine.
He supplied Mel's Southern
California operation.
But there was a problem.
Mel said that Eddie's
split the market.
- Did he?
- Does it matter?
Mel thought he did.
- Well, they must've patched
up their differences.
What are you gonna do if
Mel doesn't wanna see you?
- Oh, I'll remember him of what
he said when I was leaving.
I wouldn't make it on my own,
and sooner or later I'd be back.
(chuckles)
Mel loves hearing he's right.
- I wanna buy dinner tonight.
I hear there's a great
new sushi joint nearby.
- You really eat that stuff?
- [Vinnie] Frank!
- Now, you tell me what the
hell happened last night.
We were all the way across
town when the fire started!
- Yeah, I know, I know.
This isn't a trusting
environment, Frank.
Either Mel gave Roger
the wrong address,
or Roger was doing
a number on me.
I couldn't try to
get a hold of you,
I would've given myself away!
You know who owned that complex?
- Eddie Van Platt.
- Yeah, well, he
owns a baseball team
in the Mexican league too.
He was using it to
transport drugs.
He and Mel were partners,
until they had some
kind of a falling out.
- Where did you get this?
- From a source who
have no reason to lie,
don't worry about it.
- Yeah, well, it's gonna take
a little time to check it out.
- We'll be cruising just
outside the breakwater tonight.
We should be back by two,
three in the morning.
- You stay clear of Van
Platt when you dock,
in case we want
to make the grab.
- Alright.
- And Vinnie, if these guys
got old scores to settle,
you find yourself a neutral
corner and you just watch.
(sighs)
- How about a taco?
(upbeat 80s pop music)
(thunder booms)
- Eddie Van Platt!
Excuse me.
Hey, hey, hey,
you look terrific!
Cabo?
- No, no, I sold that shack
when the blue hairs moved in.
(chuckles)
I bought an island
off the Yucatan.
I'm building a house
there designed by Warnick.
25,000 square feet.
- Nice!
- Mel! Look who's
come back to us.
You remember
Jacqueline, don't you?
- Sure, you were away?
25,000 square feet,
what are you gonna do,
put it in a gift shop or what?
(chuckling)
- Come with me,
I'd like you to meet
some of the newer people.
- Hi, baby.
There's a group gathering
in the playroom.
Wanna play?
(laughs)
- Alright, tell you
what, why don't you keep
a place warm for me, alright?
- I'll do that.
- Okay.
(wind howling)
(thunder rumbles)
- The captain says he can't
get inside the breakwater
before the storm hits.
He suggests that we drop
the anchor and ride it out.
- Alright, tell anyone
who wants to leave,
that the cigarette will
take him back to port.
Hey, Eddie, you wanna
get something to eat?
- Yeah, sure.
- Mel, could we go to
the stateroom and talk?
(chuckles)
- That's nice meat.
She looks familiar.
- Yeah, don't they all.
Hey, listen, Eddie, I hear you
got the Sacramento franchise.
- Yeah, I was so smooth
with those owners,
you could've skated on me.
I'm gonna build the largest
dome stadium in the country.
75,000 seats.
- You're gonna ship the dope
in the bats like the old days?
- What, are you kidding?
This is major league ball.
It's 100% legitimate.
At the winter meetings,
I'm gonna be sitting
next to Steinbrenner.
(laughs)
- I want it.
I want your team.
Fill in any number
you want, Eddie.
2,400?
- You just bought yourself
two season box seats.
See you at the ballpark.
(chuckles)
They're gonna be ferrying
people off this barge.
Why don't you come
back to town with me?
I own the regency.
Van house is plenty
big for two people.
- I'm with Mel tonight.
- Has anybody told him?
(laughs)
- He seems attracted.
What did you say
her name was again?
- Just a girl who wants
to come in from the cold.
(thunder cracks)
- Roger.
I don't care who leaves
on that cigarette,
but Eddie and that girl
aren't going anywhere.
- I always wondered
why you left us.
Mel was very, very hurt.
- Mel doesn't remember who I am.
- No, you know
showing affection,
especially in front
of other people,
has always been
difficult for him.
But he missed you, Jacqueline.
And he's very glad
that you're back.
You'll stay onboard
with us, won't you?
(chuckles)
- Yeah, I'll stay.
- Wish I was on that cigarette.
Hurts to admit it but I'm
not a rough weather sailor.
- Where's Mel?
- Try the playroom?
Hear they're breaking
out the vegetable oil.
(thunder rumbles)
- Hesaid he was gonna
hold that boat for me.
- The ship's as seaworthy
as they come, Mr. Van Platt.
You got nothing to worry about.
- I don't want to be
stuck here all night.
- That cigarette comes
back, you'll be on it.
- Yeah.
- They're predicting
a bad storm.
- I never heard of a good one.
(whispers)
- Aw, you're feeling good, baby?
Yeah, you're feeling good.
- Gonna be a hell of a storm.
Just don't know whether it's
gonna be rougher out there,
or in here.
(thundering)
- Do you forgive me, Mel?
- Forgive you for what?
- For taking so long to realize
that this is where I belong?
- Sure, I forgive you, baby.
- Like to get to the rail but
I don't think I'd make it.
- I want off this
boat, Mel, now.
- The cigarette will
be right back, Eddie.
- That's what they
said two hours ago.
- Why don't you relax, Eddie?
You're among friends,
have another drink.
You reconsidered my offer?
For the team?
Would 10 million
be a fair price?
- That wouldn't even cover the
cost of the balls and bats.
- Alright, 20 then.
- You're wasting your time, Mel.
The team is not for sale.
(chuckles)
- Everything's for sale, Eddie.
Suppose I add a little
sweetener to the deal.
- What kind of sweetener?
- An extra player.
A player to be named now.
Why don't you take Eddie
up to the playroom, huh?
Make him happy?
- Mel.
- What do you say?
- Sounds like a prospect
worth considering.
- Mel, please.
- Hey, consider it
your readmission price.
Huh?
I'm presenting you
with an option.
You can come back to the
world that offers you nothing
but the excitements you crave,
or you could go back to the
world that offers you nothing.
Choice is yours.
(thunder rumbles)
- Hit me again, will you?
(drink pouring)
- What's wrong?
Looks like you just
lost your best friend.
(typing number)
- [Frank] Yeah?
- Frank, yeah, I got the
report from the Federales
on Van Platt's
Mexican ball team.
In the last year and a half,
the manager and four
players have been arrested
for transportation with intent.
- Okay.
You fax me a copy stat,
we'll put the pieces
together from here.
Alright, Kenny, let's roll.
We got ourselves a Mexican
connection to Mel Profitt.
- Seems like you're going
through an awful lot of trouble
just to get a baseball team.
- It's worth the trouble.
It's what I've always wanted.
- Oh yeah?
What happens after you get it?
What'll be the next thing
you've always wanted?
I mean, what is it
that you want, Mel?
More power, more money?
Or just more, what is it?
- What, you major in
Psychology, Vinnie?
- No, but I learned
a lot from umpires.
I call 'em the way I see it.
(thunder rumbles)
- You're an insightful
man, Vinnie.
Insightful man can
be valuable assets.
Or crippling liabilities.
- The pause that refreshes.
- Now we got a deal to discuss.
- Um, (grunts)
more I think about it, the
less I feel like selling.
- You want the team
that much, huh?
- Come on, Mel,
it's not the team.
It's having something
that the other guy wants.
Something they want
and they can't have.
That's why I wouldn't
sell it for 30 million,
or 50 million.
Last thing I need is your money.
(snickers)
- But you're wrong, Eddie.
You need my money more
than you can possibly know.
Your fire the other night,
the three million dollar loss,
the insurance will
never pay on an arson.
- I had nothing to
do with that fire.
I was having some
union problems.
- No one will ever
believe it was the union.
Not with the financial
problems you have.
- What financial problems?
You son of a bitch!
Where's that cigarette,
I'm getting out of here!
- You're not going
anywhere Eddie.
Strike one.
Vegas and Reno, they're
calling in your markers.
Almost three million
dollars, that's strike two.
- All that stuff your
sweet sister is shooting
in between your toes,
I think it must've killed off
a couple of brain cells, Mel.
I'm no rookie in this game.
You can't muscle me.
Couple of markers are called in,
the cash is no problem.
The team is mine.
And it's gonna stay mine.
- What did UniDAQ
Industries close at today?
- 165, 170.
- 180, 250.
By tomorrow morning at 10
o'clock, it'll barely be listed.
- You're out of your mind.
- Oh, I guess you haven't heard.
The Department of Defense
canceled its contracts.
Now, since your investment
portfolio is almost
exclusively margined with
UniDAQ shares as collateral,
(clears throat) and now
that UniDAQ is uni-dead,
you can't cover
your margin calls.
You can't get off this boat.
Can't call your brokers.
You're gonna lose
by my calculation,
over $96 million.
That's strike three, Eddie.
(thunder rumbles)
- You knew you
were gonna do this.
You had this all planned.
Why didn't you--
- Because I was enjoying
myself too much.
Because we were playing a game
you had no chance of winning
and because I loved
every minute of it!
You cut me out of
the Mexican deal
and now I'm paying you back!
- That isn't true!
- You let Vizzine and
Calderon onto my territory!
My territory!
I've known the truth and
I've known it for two years.
Now, you will sell me
that team, won't you?
But come to think of it,
I think $20 million is
much too high in price.
I think I outta be able
to pick it up for five.
Six million, max.
Nothing compared
to what you owe.
- You can't do this, Mel.
- I already have.
Roger?
Take Eddie down to the
playroom and lock him in.
And make sure the
telephone is disconnected
and there aren't any
sharp instruments around.
I wouldn't want him to
cut himself accidentally!
(thunder rumbles)
- Mr. Van Platt, please.
(concerning music)
- I did what you wanted me to.
I made love to him
like you wanted me to.
- Apparently, you
weren't very good.
I want you out of my sight.
Vinnie, get rid of her.
- Mel?
- I want her off the boat.
- [Jacqueline] We're in
the middle of the ocean.
- I want her gone now.
You push her Vinnie.
I want to hear her
body hitting the water!
Push her off the boat.
- No.
- I said, push her, Vinnie.
(tense music)
You don't think
I'll do it, do you?
You think I'm playing
like the last time?
It's a full load, Vinnie.
You don't think I'll
kill you, do you?
- I don't know what
you're gonna do, Mel.
I only know what
I'm not gonna do.
- She's nothing Vinnie,
she means nothing.
- The way you see things,
that's probably true.
- Do what I say.
You don't seem to
understand, Vinnie.
You don't have a choice.
- You're wrong, Mel!
I have the clearest
choice in the world.
(gun fires)
- I'm tired.
I'm very tired.
I'm gonna go to sleep now.
(thundering)
(shaky breathing)
- So have you
figured it out yet?
- What's that?
- Why Mel didn't kill you.
- Ah.
I quit trying to figure him out
five minutes after I met him.
- Well, I have two theories.
The first is that,
he really wants somebody
to stand up to him.
Just somebody to say no.
I mean, we're talking down deep.
- Yeah, well, that's so
deep you can get the bends.
What's your second theory?
- Susan.
I know I have choices to
make and I didn't before.
Thank you, Vinnie.
- Sure.
Take care of yourself.
(car engine starts)
- When told Van Platt
we knew about Mexico,
he practically begged us
to testify against Profitt.
We're processing him
through the witness
protection program now.
- Good.
- Hey, did you read
the sports page?
Listen to this.
International financier Melvin
Profitt's bid to purchase
the new Sacramento franchise
of the American League,
was rejected by
committee of team owners.
Those who could be
reached for comment
sighted Profitt's lifestyle
which they felt by cast
doubt on the
integrity of the game.
- What did Mick Jagger say?
You can't always
get what you want?
Not even if you're Mel Profitt.
- Mel, what's wrong?
- Don't let the light in, Susie.
I want it to be dark.
I want it to be dark forever.
(ominous music)
(hard-hitting
orchestrated music)
(grand boisterous music)
Tonight on Wiseguy--
- Don't you just love the
crackle of an open fire?
Kind of reminds me of
Christmas time at Grandma's.
(smashing)
- You sleep with
him if you have to,
but don't fall in love with him.
- It'll be a hell of a storm.
Just don't know whether it's
gonna be rougher out there,
or in here.
- Push her off the boat!
- No.
- You don't seem to
understand, Vinnie.
You don't have a choice.
- You're wrong, Mel!
- You don't think
I'll kill you, do you?
(hard-hitting
orchestrated music)
- [Roger] Ever tell
you what my favorite
time of the year is?
- [Vinnie] No, but
I wish you would.
I'm sure it'd make
life worth living.
- Oh, this gig getting to you?
- You know what, you wake me
up in the middle of the night,
you pull me out of a dream
that's worth at
least 10 Hail Marys,
it's the third time this month,
you tell me there's a
bomb on Mel's yacht.
(Roger laughs)
Maybe it is getting
to me a little bit.
- My favorite time of year is
anytime Mel's depressed.
Did you know, three or
four days, maybe a week,
he'll be lying in his bed,
covers over his head,
paralyzed because he can't
decide what shirt to put on!
The only trouble with
Mel's depressions is
that he comes out of them.
- You mean, like now?
- Exactamente!
He still thinks that
half the civilized world
is conspiring against him.
- Well, if it's just paranoia
then what are we doing here?
- Suppose he's right.
There's gonna be a 100
people on this boat
day after tomorrow,
among them my most favorite
person in the whole wide world.
- How many times
you swept this tub?
- Oh, more times
than I can count.
- And how many bombs
have you found?
- None.
Until now.
(grave music)
Ever think about how
you're gonna die?
- Yeah, always hoped
it'll be old age.
What do you think of this?
- I don't know.
Might be a timer,
or a trembler switch.
I don't want to take
a chance on moving it.
(sighs) It's no timer.
I don't see any
wires in the tape.
Course they could be
using microcircuitry.
Those wires are tenth
the size of a human hair.
Damn near invisible.
(sighs)
(hard breathing)
(sighs)
(sighs)
Okay.
Now, when I remove the lid,
if there's no tripwire
inside and we're still alive,
I want you to shine
a light inside,
so I can see the detonator.
(ominous music)
- Here's to adrenaline.
Nectar of the gods, Mel.
That son a bitch!
(Door knocks)
- [Man] Vinnie!
- All right!
What?
- Hey! How you doing Vinnie?
What you been up to?
- Oh, not too much, Mel.
Just watching my life
flash before my eyes,
while Roger was taking
apart your phony bomb.
- (snickers) So you found it.
Good. I'm glad.
I was worried that security
had been slacking off.
- Mm-hmm.
- You got to admit,
I'm fun to be around.
- Good night, Mel.
- (chuckles) There's
nothing like palpable death
to get the old juices flowing.
Exhilarating and terrifying
at the same time.
It's kind of like
love, I suppose.
Don't be mad.
I don't want you to be.
Now put your sneaks on, we're
gonna go hit a few balls.
Wade Boggs' mound.
- Mel, it's four
o'clock in the morning!
- Well, this place has lights.
- I'm sure it's closed.
- Well, ordinarily, yeah.
But I gave the guy 10 grand so--
it's open.
Show him the heat!
Yeah!
That's solid Vinnie!
Come on, come on!
(baseball cracks)
Hey, you know, you look
good in double knits.
- I was raised in 'em.
(giggles)
- Hey, Bobbie, remind
me to thank you later
for letting us in
the locker room!
Come on, come on,
come on, come on.
Oh yeah! We got a hitter here!
(giggles)
You played organized
ball, didn't you?
- Yeah, American Legion.
- Yeah, hot corner?
- No, I'm one of the
tools of ignorance.
- A catcher?
I can see it.
I can see you blocking the play
from those runners
coming in from third.
- Oh yeah?
See me in traction too?
(laughs)
- Alright, Bobbie, look alive!
Gonna have some rockets
coming back at you!
Come on, Bobbie!
- I hope Mel didn't take you
away from anything important.
(chuckles)
- I was alone, Susan.
Alright, Mel!
- That's a dinger!
400 yards over the left wall!
The crowd's going wild!
(mimics crowd roar)
- (chuckles) 400 yards?
- Come on, Mel, I'm
exhausted, let's go.
- Alright, well you go
wait in the car, honey.
We'll be done in a minute.
- So Mel, what
positions you play?
- We moved around too much.
We were never one place, so,
you know, there was
the sandlot stuff,
but, uh--
- Yeah.
(cracks)
- What I wanted
more than anything
was to wear a number on my
back, you know what I mean?
A big number seven,
just like The Mick.
Okay, last pitch!
Bottom of the ninth, two out,
full count, bases loaded.
There is no joy in Mudville.
You know,
I used to fall
asleep at the radio,
listening to the games
from Yankee stadium,
I could see Mantel
and Berra and Ford,
performing their magic.
God, it was as clear
as if I had box seats.
Those were the days, Vinnie.
Those were the days
heroes walked the earth.
I can't wait anymore.
I gotta tell ya.
- What?
- I'm gonna buy a team!
- What?
- Yeah, there's a new
franchise in Sacramento.
I'm gonna buy 'em, I'm
gonna buy this place too.
- Mel, we're in Vancouver.
- Yeah, I know, but I'm
gonna move 'em here.
That's why I've coming
out here nights.
I gotta get myself in shape!
- Mel, just 'cause
you own a team,
doesn't mean you could play.
- But you're wrong, Vinnie.
That's exactly what it means.
(laughs)
Thanks a lot, it
was a great fun.
- Is he serious about buying
a Sacramento franchise?
- When it comes to acquisitions,
Mel is always serious.
- Yeah, I know he
likes the game,
but why does he
wanna be an owner?
- The most important reason?
Because it's something
he doesn't have.
- Oh.
- Isn't that what we all want?
- What are the other reasons?
- Darling--
- Yeah?
- Friday night?
- The cruise?
I want you to deliver a guest.
- Who?
- Eddie Van Platt.
It's very important to Mel
that he'd be there, okay?
- Having fun kids?
(glasses shattering)
- Mel!
(shattering)
Stop it right now!
(glass shatters)
What is the matter with you!
- I can turn this place into
a junkyard in five minutes
and not you or anyone
else can stop me!
Everything here is mine,
and I can break it if I want to!
- Mel!
- Everything here is here
because it pleases me!
And it's here for as
long as it pleases me!
And when it stops pleasing me,
I'll get rid of it!
- Mel! You're breaking my neck!
(sighs)
- You're not falling in
love with him, are you?
Please tell me you aren't.
If you fall in love
him then I'd be alone.
I'd disappear.
We've known all of
this couldn't last.
We've always known it.
When you're standing
on top of Everest,
there's only one direction left.
Stay with me, Susie?
Until it's over?
- Mel.
I'm not going anywhere.
- You promise?
- Yeah.
- You know what happens
if you break your promise.
- Yeah, grow a very long nose.
- You sleep with
him if you have to,
but don't fall in love with him.
I couldn't bear that.
I couldn't.
- Smell it.
The city smells.
- Ah, it's fresh air, Frank.
You'll get used to it!
Just a matter of time!
- Time, I'll give you some time.
There's a three
hour time difference
between here and Atlantic city.
And the RD wants a
daily report file.
I call him, he's out to lunch.
He calls me back, I'm
grabbing a sandwich.
By the time I get back,
he's on the way home
and the next morning,
we start the whole thing all--
(jacket pops)
(sighs)
You know,
you pay $150 for a suit,
you expect the
buttons to stay on.
- That's why they sell
needles and thread, Frank.
Well, Frank, relax.
You know, it's just a button.
- It's not just a button.
We're talking about the
collapse of national pride here.
We've already lost
the auto industry.
Nobody in the States
can make a stereo,
and now, they can't
keep my buttons on!
- Frank, what's bugging ya?
- [Frank] Nothing!
- The hell's the
matter with Frank?
- Ah, he's grumpy.
So what's new among
the lifestyles of
the rich and vicious?
- Listen, you know
anything about a guy
named Eddie Van Platt?
- Yeah, a real estate magnate,
born with a silver
spoon in his mouth
that he's turned into
service for a thousand.
- Any indication that he did
any business with Profitt?
- I don't know of any.
I mean the guy's become a
legend in his spare time.
Builds condos, he's got
two shipping companies,
dog tracks in Florida,
a new franchise in the
American League, and--
- Wait a minute, wait a
minute, wait a minute.
He owns a baseball team?
- Yeah, in Sacramento I think.
- Profitt said he wanted
to buy that franchise.
- Well, all I know
is that Van Platt
is ready to break
ground with the stadium.
- May I interject a point here?
Who cares?
- Look, Frank, I'm supposed
to pick up this Van Platt guy
and bring him to Mel's
boat for a party on Friday.
Now, I wouldn't want to be the
guy that has what Mel wants,
you know what I mean?
- Hey, wait a minute.
And if Van Platt is
connected to Profitt,
and then you can get
him to turn over--
- No, no, what kind of carrot
am I gonna be able to dangle
if I don't even know he's dirty?
- Well, we'll find
something, Vince.
As I recall, the
third letter in FBI
stands for investigation.
Now you get on that boat,
you don't let Van Platt
out of your sight.
- Yeah, well, that's
gonna be tough Frank.
People at Mel's parties
tend to get naked in groups.
You know, from certain angles
they all look the same.
- Oh yeah?
- Well, I'll talk to Lococco.
Maybe he knows what Profitt
and Van Platt have going.
- Hello, Roger.
Jacqueline Devries?
I met you at the
Profitt's two summers ago?
In Montro?
- Ah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Did you and I have a thing
or were you with, Mel?
- Mel.
Thank you.
- Never expected
to see you again.
- [Jacqueline] I can tell by
the warmth of your greeting.
- A lot of faces go through
those revolving doors.
After awhile they--
- Look, I have to see him.
I have to see Mel.
- Oh, sweet thing.
You know the way it works.
When you're gone, you're gone.
You had your moment, it's over.
- Just take me to him, Roger.
- How important is it to you?
(chuckles)
- Everything is still a test.
- We all have our limits.
I would just like to
see what yours are.
(banging)
Meeting Mel was like
going into a toy store
for the first time, wasn't it?
Everything shiny, new.
And all you had to
do was reach out
and grab hold of
all the goodies.
Well, how long did it
take you to figure it out?
That the toy
was you?
(banging)
Lovely to look at!
(bangs)
Thrilling
to hold.
(bangs)
But nothing so useless as
a toy that's grown old.
(banging)
She's not an old
toy to you, is she?
Jacqueline, Vinnie!
Who knows?
Maybe she's still good
for a couple of laughs.
(concerning music)
(motorcycle revs)
- Roger's just your
basic all American boy.
Took a sharp right somewhere.
- Roger and I were new
in this thing together.
I'm surprised to hear
he was still around.
Mel and Susan usually clean
house every year or so.
What did you say
your name was again?
- Vinnie.
- Vinnie.
- I like Vincent
better, do you mind?
- Now look, why don't you
let me get you a hotel room?
You look beat.
- I'm not completely.
So, Vincent, how long
have you been around?
- Long enough to know the
players from the payers.
- Is there a difference?
- Jackie, come on,
you let that guy throw
those ball bearings six
inches from your head,
you never even flinched.
- He's either losing
his eye or his nerve.
He used to part people's
hair with those.
Do you ever wonder why
he does things like that?
- I wonder why people let him.
- DiStephana feels
that the gold market
presents an excellent
opportunity.
We have a fiscal possession of
200,000 ounces in the vaults
in London and The Hague.
- You make arrangements to
get Van Platt to the boat?
- Yes.
Vinnie's going to take him.
- Van Platt is such a smug
little bastard, don't you think?
He's got no idea what's coming.
No idea that I've known about
his treachery for two years.
- You have no proof
that Eddie Van Platt--
- The Mexican deal was mine!
Until he let Vazzina
and Calderon move in.
The proof is they're
moving the dust
into Texas and
Louisiana and I'm not!
My god Susan, am I the
only one that can see it?
Am I the only one who
isn't fooled and blinded
by treachery and selfishness?
I'm glad I didn't
have him killed
when I first
discovered the truth.
What a waste that would've been.
Did you get all the
names of the casinos
that have extended him credit?
- Yeah, Slater's working on it.
- I must have them
before we cruise.
Thanks, Mark.
(laughs)
An announcement will
be made within 48 hours
that the Department of
Defense is canceling
its jet fighter contract
with UniDAQ Industries.
It's some problem with
substandard parts.
- Where did they come from?
- Friends of ours.
Get Tony on the phone,
have him liquidate our
position immediately.
UniDAQ stock is all
gonna but disappear.
Which one do you like better?
- The pinstripes are nice.
- Yeah, they're
my favorites too.
You know why the
Yankees wear them?
- Mel, you haven't
had an hour of sleep
in four days.
- Because Babe Ruth got fat.
The owner knew that if you
put a fat man in pinstripes,
he's gonna look thinner.
So, it'll be pinstripes
for the home uniform.
Oh, and get Roger for
me, will you Susie?
There's something I want
him to do for me tonight.
(sighs)
Susie,
forgive me for shouting.
- Just the usual, I suppose.
New York at 16.
I lived with a photographer
who shot my covers.
Then Paris, then Geneva.
I almost married the grandson
of the last king of Italy.
- Didn't you go through with it?
- He was killed.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
- By a bottle of champagne.
We were making love
in his parent's villa,
and a magnum of
Dom Perignon fell,
and fractured his skull.
(snickers)
- I guess it beats getting
hit by a garbage truck.
- I wasn't in love
with him though.
But marriage seemed like
a good idea at the time.
I never told
anybody that before.
- So how'd you meet Mel?
- Oh, you know the
line from Casablanca?
Everybody comes to Rick's.
Well, I lived in
a world of glamor.
His was a world of wealth.
Worlds collide.
Beng with Mel was like
riding the tail of a comet.
- Yeah, but you
decided to leave.
And from what I've seen,
most people hang on
as long as they can.
- After one night
of particularly
strenuous depravity,
I looked in the mirror.
I didn't recognize myself.
You know, all my life,
I've been an ornament
for one man or another.
I just wanted to see if I could
live by myself, for myself.
Truth is, I can't.
I need the rush, Vincent.
I'm addicted to the life.
I have no choice.
- Come on.
There are only choices
you wanna make,
and choices you don't.
- When he's in the mood,
nobody lives like Mel Profitt.
And once you've lived with him,
the rest of the world seems
very dark and very cold.
- But you live too
close to the flame,
you're gonna get burned.
- But before you burn,
at least you get warm.
- Eight minutes 40 seconds.
Pathetic!
- The hell are you doing here?
- I've been looking for you.
I called you here,
you were gone.
Went back to my place and
the sweet thing was gone.
- You know you
could've killed her
with that ball bearing stunt.
- She's alive, isn't she?
- Yeah, but she's
hurt and scared,
and the last thing she needs
is be out of that circus
floating in the harbor.
- What do you think I
was trying to tell her?
Hope you two don't have any
early plans for tonight.
Mel's got a job for us.
- What is it?
- There's a construction
site on Beech and Lafayette.
Gonna be a condo
complex except it's not.
- What, we're gonna blow it?
- Too much noise
and I hate the dust.
So we're gonna
sing a torch song.
- For what?
- I forgot to ask.
Pick you up at 11:30.
Don't worry we won't be late.
She can light your fire
after we light this one.
(sighs)
- Agent 4587, day code,
USA entertainment,
box, nation, thriller.
- Well, how's it goin',
Sergeant Preston?
- Listen, I need McPike to
alert some uniform locals
to patrol the area around
Beech and Lafayette
tonight at midnight.
- Why uniforms?
- Profitt wants a
building torched
and Lococco and I are
gonna be the firebugs.
- Beech and Lafayette.
I got it Vinnie, we'll cover.
- So he says to her, "$100?
"$100?
"Since when does the price
include a $98 tip, huh?"
(chuckles)
(groans)
Alright, so I'm no comedian.
- Well, that I already know.
- This is McPike,
my watch says 11:55.
Alright, now, let's
nobody get antsy, girls.
Wait for him to get
inside the fence
and start futzing around first.
- Frank, what's going on?
Hey, you been snapping at me
for the past couple of days now!
So I figure,
you either read a book
about Pearl Harbor,
or you're homesick.
(chuckles and snorts)
- You have kids?
- Yeah.
- I have a boy.
Good boy.
He's in the school orchestra.
He plays the oboe.
School had a concert tonight.
It was his first concert.
And I missed it by 3,000 miles.
There'll never be a
first concert again.
I think he and I got
cheated out of a memory.
(car brakes)
(crickets chirp)
- What are we doing here, Roger?
Beech and Lafayette's
12 blocks from here.
- I know the city.
- This isn't even the place
we're suppose to torch.
- Yes, it is!
- Well, what was the
charade all about?
- I don't know.
Ask Mel.
- Perimeter units, have
you seen any activity?
- [Cop On Radio]
Unit Two, negative.
- [Another Cop On Radio]
Unit One, negative.
- This is real subtle Roger.
Why don't we just get some
napalm and really do the job?
- I believe the point
is being lost by you.
Mel wants to make sure
that even a blind man
could see this was arson.
Man, this place is gonna
go up like a rocket!
Plenty of time for you
and the sweet thing.
- Perimeter units, you
guys awake or what?
- [Cop On Radio] Nobody's
even walked past the fence.
It's dead out here.
(ominous music)
(fire booms)
- Eh, the last thing this
town needs is more condos.
Maybe Eddie will build a
playground for the kiddies.
- Eddie?
- Van Platt, one of
Mel's old associates.
Don't you just love the
crackle of an open fire?
Kinda reminds me of
Christmas time at grandma's.
- I don't like this, Kenny.
- Mel's meshuga.
I mean he probably
changed the whole deal.
Just call Lifeguard.
Vinnie's probably--
(sirens blaring)
(laughs)
- Hey! Morning pal!
- [Vinnie] Say, Mel.
- What do you think, huh?
- That looks good on you, Mel.
- It's a lot better
than the clown suits
we had on the other night.
Hey, hey!
Let it billow out a little
till I drop a few pounds.
The best.
- Oh yeah.
- Now you pick any
number you want.
Now, where do you think we
oughta have spring training?
I hate Florida, it's
only good for business.
How about, Arizona, New Mexico?
What do you think of Santa Fe?
- Yeah, sure.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Santa Fe.
Alright, enough!
- Thank you Mr. Profitt.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Very good job you and
Roger did last night.
Over three million
dollars damage.
I'm very impressed, Vinnie.
- I can't take credit
for this one, Mel.
Roger ran the show.
- But you learned something.
That's why I wanted
you to go along.
Every experience should
be a learning experience.
- Listen, do you remember
anybody by the name--
- Good morning.
- [Vinnie] Hi.
- Oh, you look so cute!
(kisses)
- You like it kid?
- Well, it has a
certain elegance.
Don't you think so, Vinnie?
- Oh yeah, that's definitely
the word I'd use, yeah.
- I'm looking forward
to seeing you in it.
Listen, I made plans
with Van Platt's people.
Vinnie and Roger are gonna
pick 'em up tonight at nine,
and take 'em
directly to the boat.
- Well, wait a minute, you
don't need the both of us
to pick up one guy.
- Eddie knows Roger, it'll
make him feel more comfortable.
Here you go, here's the address.
- Oh, Vinnie, you wanted
to ask me about something?
- Oh no, it's not important.
I'll see you tonight.
- Alright, try it on,
let me know how it fits.
- Okay Mel.
- I checked with the captain.
He's expecting
rough seas tonight.
- Perfect.
- Listen, Roger and I
are supposed to pick up
this guy tonight for the cruise.
His name's Eddie Van Platt.
- You're kidding?
After the way Mel carried
on about their Mexican deal?
- What, they were
business partners?
- Once.
Eddie owned a baseball
team down in Mexico.
He may still own it.
He used it to bury cocaine.
He supplied Mel's Southern
California operation.
But there was a problem.
Mel said that Eddie's
split the market.
- Did he?
- Does it matter?
Mel thought he did.
- Well, they must've patched
up their differences.
What are you gonna do if
Mel doesn't wanna see you?
- Oh, I'll remember him of what
he said when I was leaving.
I wouldn't make it on my own,
and sooner or later I'd be back.
(chuckles)
Mel loves hearing he's right.
- I wanna buy dinner tonight.
I hear there's a great
new sushi joint nearby.
- You really eat that stuff?
- [Vinnie] Frank!
- Now, you tell me what the
hell happened last night.
We were all the way across
town when the fire started!
- Yeah, I know, I know.
This isn't a trusting
environment, Frank.
Either Mel gave Roger
the wrong address,
or Roger was doing
a number on me.
I couldn't try to
get a hold of you,
I would've given myself away!
You know who owned that complex?
- Eddie Van Platt.
- Yeah, well, he
owns a baseball team
in the Mexican league too.
He was using it to
transport drugs.
He and Mel were partners,
until they had some
kind of a falling out.
- Where did you get this?
- From a source who
have no reason to lie,
don't worry about it.
- Yeah, well, it's gonna take
a little time to check it out.
- We'll be cruising just
outside the breakwater tonight.
We should be back by two,
three in the morning.
- You stay clear of Van
Platt when you dock,
in case we want
to make the grab.
- Alright.
- And Vinnie, if these guys
got old scores to settle,
you find yourself a neutral
corner and you just watch.
(sighs)
- How about a taco?
(upbeat 80s pop music)
(thunder booms)
- Eddie Van Platt!
Excuse me.
Hey, hey, hey,
you look terrific!
Cabo?
- No, no, I sold that shack
when the blue hairs moved in.
(chuckles)
I bought an island
off the Yucatan.
I'm building a house
there designed by Warnick.
25,000 square feet.
- Nice!
- Mel! Look who's
come back to us.
You remember
Jacqueline, don't you?
- Sure, you were away?
25,000 square feet,
what are you gonna do,
put it in a gift shop or what?
(chuckling)
- Come with me,
I'd like you to meet
some of the newer people.
- Hi, baby.
There's a group gathering
in the playroom.
Wanna play?
(laughs)
- Alright, tell you
what, why don't you keep
a place warm for me, alright?
- I'll do that.
- Okay.
(wind howling)
(thunder rumbles)
- The captain says he can't
get inside the breakwater
before the storm hits.
He suggests that we drop
the anchor and ride it out.
- Alright, tell anyone
who wants to leave,
that the cigarette will
take him back to port.
Hey, Eddie, you wanna
get something to eat?
- Yeah, sure.
- Mel, could we go to
the stateroom and talk?
(chuckles)
- That's nice meat.
She looks familiar.
- Yeah, don't they all.
Hey, listen, Eddie, I hear you
got the Sacramento franchise.
- Yeah, I was so smooth
with those owners,
you could've skated on me.
I'm gonna build the largest
dome stadium in the country.
75,000 seats.
- You're gonna ship the dope
in the bats like the old days?
- What, are you kidding?
This is major league ball.
It's 100% legitimate.
At the winter meetings,
I'm gonna be sitting
next to Steinbrenner.
(laughs)
- I want it.
I want your team.
Fill in any number
you want, Eddie.
2,400?
- You just bought yourself
two season box seats.
See you at the ballpark.
(chuckles)
They're gonna be ferrying
people off this barge.
Why don't you come
back to town with me?
I own the regency.
Van house is plenty
big for two people.
- I'm with Mel tonight.
- Has anybody told him?
(laughs)
- He seems attracted.
What did you say
her name was again?
- Just a girl who wants
to come in from the cold.
(thunder cracks)
- Roger.
I don't care who leaves
on that cigarette,
but Eddie and that girl
aren't going anywhere.
- I always wondered
why you left us.
Mel was very, very hurt.
- Mel doesn't remember who I am.
- No, you know
showing affection,
especially in front
of other people,
has always been
difficult for him.
But he missed you, Jacqueline.
And he's very glad
that you're back.
You'll stay onboard
with us, won't you?
(chuckles)
- Yeah, I'll stay.
- Wish I was on that cigarette.
Hurts to admit it but I'm
not a rough weather sailor.
- Where's Mel?
- Try the playroom?
Hear they're breaking
out the vegetable oil.
(thunder rumbles)
- Hesaid he was gonna
hold that boat for me.
- The ship's as seaworthy
as they come, Mr. Van Platt.
You got nothing to worry about.
- I don't want to be
stuck here all night.
- That cigarette comes
back, you'll be on it.
- Yeah.
- They're predicting
a bad storm.
- I never heard of a good one.
(whispers)
- Aw, you're feeling good, baby?
Yeah, you're feeling good.
- Gonna be a hell of a storm.
Just don't know whether it's
gonna be rougher out there,
or in here.
(thundering)
- Do you forgive me, Mel?
- Forgive you for what?
- For taking so long to realize
that this is where I belong?
- Sure, I forgive you, baby.
- Like to get to the rail but
I don't think I'd make it.
- I want off this
boat, Mel, now.
- The cigarette will
be right back, Eddie.
- That's what they
said two hours ago.
- Why don't you relax, Eddie?
You're among friends,
have another drink.
You reconsidered my offer?
For the team?
Would 10 million
be a fair price?
- That wouldn't even cover the
cost of the balls and bats.
- Alright, 20 then.
- You're wasting your time, Mel.
The team is not for sale.
(chuckles)
- Everything's for sale, Eddie.
Suppose I add a little
sweetener to the deal.
- What kind of sweetener?
- An extra player.
A player to be named now.
Why don't you take Eddie
up to the playroom, huh?
Make him happy?
- Mel.
- What do you say?
- Sounds like a prospect
worth considering.
- Mel, please.
- Hey, consider it
your readmission price.
Huh?
I'm presenting you
with an option.
You can come back to the
world that offers you nothing
but the excitements you crave,
or you could go back to the
world that offers you nothing.
Choice is yours.
(thunder rumbles)
- Hit me again, will you?
(drink pouring)
- What's wrong?
Looks like you just
lost your best friend.
(typing number)
- [Frank] Yeah?
- Frank, yeah, I got the
report from the Federales
on Van Platt's
Mexican ball team.
In the last year and a half,
the manager and four
players have been arrested
for transportation with intent.
- Okay.
You fax me a copy stat,
we'll put the pieces
together from here.
Alright, Kenny, let's roll.
We got ourselves a Mexican
connection to Mel Profitt.
- Seems like you're going
through an awful lot of trouble
just to get a baseball team.
- It's worth the trouble.
It's what I've always wanted.
- Oh yeah?
What happens after you get it?
What'll be the next thing
you've always wanted?
I mean, what is it
that you want, Mel?
More power, more money?
Or just more, what is it?
- What, you major in
Psychology, Vinnie?
- No, but I learned
a lot from umpires.
I call 'em the way I see it.
(thunder rumbles)
- You're an insightful
man, Vinnie.
Insightful man can
be valuable assets.
Or crippling liabilities.
- The pause that refreshes.
- Now we got a deal to discuss.
- Um, (grunts)
more I think about it, the
less I feel like selling.
- You want the team
that much, huh?
- Come on, Mel,
it's not the team.
It's having something
that the other guy wants.
Something they want
and they can't have.
That's why I wouldn't
sell it for 30 million,
or 50 million.
Last thing I need is your money.
(snickers)
- But you're wrong, Eddie.
You need my money more
than you can possibly know.
Your fire the other night,
the three million dollar loss,
the insurance will
never pay on an arson.
- I had nothing to
do with that fire.
I was having some
union problems.
- No one will ever
believe it was the union.
Not with the financial
problems you have.
- What financial problems?
You son of a bitch!
Where's that cigarette,
I'm getting out of here!
- You're not going
anywhere Eddie.
Strike one.
Vegas and Reno, they're
calling in your markers.
Almost three million
dollars, that's strike two.
- All that stuff your
sweet sister is shooting
in between your toes,
I think it must've killed off
a couple of brain cells, Mel.
I'm no rookie in this game.
You can't muscle me.
Couple of markers are called in,
the cash is no problem.
The team is mine.
And it's gonna stay mine.
- What did UniDAQ
Industries close at today?
- 165, 170.
- 180, 250.
By tomorrow morning at 10
o'clock, it'll barely be listed.
- You're out of your mind.
- Oh, I guess you haven't heard.
The Department of Defense
canceled its contracts.
Now, since your investment
portfolio is almost
exclusively margined with
UniDAQ shares as collateral,
(clears throat) and now
that UniDAQ is uni-dead,
you can't cover
your margin calls.
You can't get off this boat.
Can't call your brokers.
You're gonna lose
by my calculation,
over $96 million.
That's strike three, Eddie.
(thunder rumbles)
- You knew you
were gonna do this.
You had this all planned.
Why didn't you--
- Because I was enjoying
myself too much.
Because we were playing a game
you had no chance of winning
and because I loved
every minute of it!
You cut me out of
the Mexican deal
and now I'm paying you back!
- That isn't true!
- You let Vizzine and
Calderon onto my territory!
My territory!
I've known the truth and
I've known it for two years.
Now, you will sell me
that team, won't you?
But come to think of it,
I think $20 million is
much too high in price.
I think I outta be able
to pick it up for five.
Six million, max.
Nothing compared
to what you owe.
- You can't do this, Mel.
- I already have.
Roger?
Take Eddie down to the
playroom and lock him in.
And make sure the
telephone is disconnected
and there aren't any
sharp instruments around.
I wouldn't want him to
cut himself accidentally!
(thunder rumbles)
- Mr. Van Platt, please.
(concerning music)
- I did what you wanted me to.
I made love to him
like you wanted me to.
- Apparently, you
weren't very good.
I want you out of my sight.
Vinnie, get rid of her.
- Mel?
- I want her off the boat.
- [Jacqueline] We're in
the middle of the ocean.
- I want her gone now.
You push her Vinnie.
I want to hear her
body hitting the water!
Push her off the boat.
- No.
- I said, push her, Vinnie.
(tense music)
You don't think
I'll do it, do you?
You think I'm playing
like the last time?
It's a full load, Vinnie.
You don't think I'll
kill you, do you?
- I don't know what
you're gonna do, Mel.
I only know what
I'm not gonna do.
- She's nothing Vinnie,
she means nothing.
- The way you see things,
that's probably true.
- Do what I say.
You don't seem to
understand, Vinnie.
You don't have a choice.
- You're wrong, Mel!
I have the clearest
choice in the world.
(gun fires)
- I'm tired.
I'm very tired.
I'm gonna go to sleep now.
(thundering)
(shaky breathing)
- So have you
figured it out yet?
- What's that?
- Why Mel didn't kill you.
- Ah.
I quit trying to figure him out
five minutes after I met him.
- Well, I have two theories.
The first is that,
he really wants somebody
to stand up to him.
Just somebody to say no.
I mean, we're talking down deep.
- Yeah, well, that's so
deep you can get the bends.
What's your second theory?
- Susan.
I know I have choices to
make and I didn't before.
Thank you, Vinnie.
- Sure.
Take care of yourself.
(car engine starts)
- When told Van Platt
we knew about Mexico,
he practically begged us
to testify against Profitt.
We're processing him
through the witness
protection program now.
- Good.
- Hey, did you read
the sports page?
Listen to this.
International financier Melvin
Profitt's bid to purchase
the new Sacramento franchise
of the American League,
was rejected by
committee of team owners.
Those who could be
reached for comment
sighted Profitt's lifestyle
which they felt by cast
doubt on the
integrity of the game.
- What did Mick Jagger say?
You can't always
get what you want?
Not even if you're Mel Profitt.
- Mel, what's wrong?
- Don't let the light in, Susie.
I want it to be dark.
I want it to be dark forever.
(ominous music)
(hard-hitting
orchestrated music)
(grand boisterous music)