Wireless (2020–…): Season 1, Episode 2 - 90% - full transcript
[EERIE MUSIC]
[MUSIC TURNING INTO STATIC]
[HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO]
Where the hell is my phone charger?
Some joyride music, Dad?
[MUSIC CONTINUES]
WOMAN: With 5G LTE Wi-Fi,
the all-new Chevy Colorado
lets you hit the road.
But keep in touch.
♪ Who got the feeling ♪
♪ Tell me why I cry when I feel it ♪
[PHONE CLICKING]
♪ Tell me why ♪
♪ Tell me why ♪
♪ Who got the feeling ♪
♪ Tell me why I cry... ♪
VOICE: Whoa, that's impressive.
♪ Tell me why ♪
♪ Phone ringing,
never outgoing, homebody ♪
♪ Never outgoing, put my doubts on
when these walls up ♪
♪ Tearing at the black tie... ♪
[MAN HOLLERING]
WOMAN: ...of the world.
[CHEERING AND LAUGHTER]
...of the world.
[PHONE CLICKING]
♪ ...off-kilter, off-kilter ♪
♪ I turn memory to fantasy
for that better pleasure, fuck ♪
[SIGHS]
[PHONE RINGING]
- Hey, man.
JACOB: Dude, where are you?
Dude, I know what you're gonna say,
and no, I'm not coming
to the party for Dana.
Amazing, 'cause it'd be super shitty
of you to lie to your best friend.
Jake, I was just as surprised
as you were that she's coming.
But can you go to her Instagram quickly
- and look at it?
- Are you fucking kidding me?!
Oh my God.
Dude, okay, I'm doing it.
- But this is the last time, seriously.
- Dude...
Look at the last photo she posted, man.
Okay, I'm on it.
What... what is it?
Jake, dude, do you see that?
That's... that's some guy's hand
right next to her, man.
You see that?
My God.
That is a baked potato.
Dude, no, it's not.
- That's clearly some guy.
- Yes, it is.
You're tripping.
You're tripping, man.
You are, like, literally losing your mind.
And it doesn't even matter.
Like, look, I love Dana,
I love her to death,
but she's the biggest bitch
I've ever met in my life.
I mean, she broke up with you
for no reason, dude.
Come on.
Give it some time.
Download Tinder,
get yourself laid.
[BEER CAN OPENING]
Now, what time are you gonna be here?
'Cause we are shotgunning beers
at midnight
in every single time zone!
[PEOPLE CHEERING]
There are 24 time zones.
Uh, I gotta go.
It's midnight in Jerusalem, man.
- All right.
- I'll see you soon, okay?
L'Chaim, motherfucker...
[PHONE BEEPING]
Hey, Siri,
remind me in three hours
to let her come to me.
[BEEPING]
SIRI: Okay, I'll remind you.
[HIP-HOP MUSIC CONTINUES]
[CAR HORN HONKING IN DISTANCE]
Shit.
[WHISTLE BLOWING]
SIRI: Obstruction ahead.
New route detected.
[HORNS HONKING]
What?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Seven hours?
What the fuck?
[MUSIC CONTINUES]
[SIGHS]
Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.
Shit.
[PHONE DINGS]
[DING]
[WHOOSH]
[SNIFFLING]
[DING]
[CHUCKLES LIGHTLY]
Not too bad.
[DING]
[SNIFFLES]
[DINGING CONTINUES]
[GAS PUMP CLICKS]
[SIGHS]
SIRI: In two miles,
make a U-turn.
Make a U-turn now.
Shut up!
♪ Game need refreshing,
what you been suggesting ♪
♪ Wrote a new constitution,
we don't need amending ♪
♪ I go Johnnie Cochran
when I'm raisin' my defenses ♪
♪ Man, I feel like Michael Keaton
when a nigga start ascendin' ♪
♪ Never second-guessin',
had to do a lot of restin' ♪
♪ Like I played for Popovich,
tryna find our new direction ♪
♪ Listen, I ain't for the shelvin',
what you niggas tellin' ♪
♪ My team been rebellin' from wherever
you were headin', goddamn ♪
♪ This shit bump like a belly
when it's pregnant ♪
♪ Bonafide big brr lookin' like a Yeti ♪
♪ Swift feet cheetah,
that's a real big kitty ♪
♪ Who made y'all judges,
that's a real ass feeling ♪
♪ I don't like the sly ones,
forget 'em and I dead 'em ♪
♪ Always off the shit
like a constipated reverend ♪
[PHONE CHIMING]
♪ Dumb pun, all fun,
but I make your bitch ♪
♪ Crack a giggle
with the next one ♪
♪ Goofy ass boy,
look like Elmer Fudd's cousin ♪
♪ Heavy-ass feet,
bet Pluto heard you comin' ♪
♪ Actin' like Regina,
you a lil' bit dramatic ♪
♪ I been in the cockpit,
I been in the cabin ♪
♪ Take the ego out, just revolve
around the planet ♪
♪ Damn, I'm like Kirby, man,
I don't take damage ♪
♪ Oh, so hot, so, sst, get branded ♪
♪ I'm just havin' fun,
cops hit me... ♪
- WOMAN: With 5G LTE Wi-Fi...
- [GROANING]
...the all-new Chevy Colorado
lets you hit the road.
[RADIO VOLUME DECREASING]
[PHONE CHIMES]
[GASPS]
[CHIMES]
[CHIMES]
[RADIO VOLUME INCREASING]
♪ Real quick bills
still stacking to the ceiling ♪
♪ What you mean it ain't working ♪
[PHONE RINGING]
Shit.
[TIRES SQUEALING]
[CLEARS THROAT]
Hey, Mom.
[VOICE DISTORTING, CALL CUTTING OUT]
Hello? Hey...
Hey, Mom?
Mom, if you can hear me,
I'll call you back.
Mom?
[PHONE BEEPING]
Motherfucker.
[SIGHS]
[PHONE WHOOSHES]
Shit.
[HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING]
Shit.
[TIRES SCREECHING]
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
[CRASHING]
[PHONE WHOOSHES]
[MUSIC TURNING INTO STATIC]
[HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO]
Where the hell is my phone charger?
Some joyride music, Dad?
[MUSIC CONTINUES]
WOMAN: With 5G LTE Wi-Fi,
the all-new Chevy Colorado
lets you hit the road.
But keep in touch.
♪ Who got the feeling ♪
♪ Tell me why I cry when I feel it ♪
[PHONE CLICKING]
♪ Tell me why ♪
♪ Tell me why ♪
♪ Who got the feeling ♪
♪ Tell me why I cry... ♪
VOICE: Whoa, that's impressive.
♪ Tell me why ♪
♪ Phone ringing,
never outgoing, homebody ♪
♪ Never outgoing, put my doubts on
when these walls up ♪
♪ Tearing at the black tie... ♪
[MAN HOLLERING]
WOMAN: ...of the world.
[CHEERING AND LAUGHTER]
...of the world.
[PHONE CLICKING]
♪ ...off-kilter, off-kilter ♪
♪ I turn memory to fantasy
for that better pleasure, fuck ♪
[SIGHS]
[PHONE RINGING]
- Hey, man.
JACOB: Dude, where are you?
Dude, I know what you're gonna say,
and no, I'm not coming
to the party for Dana.
Amazing, 'cause it'd be super shitty
of you to lie to your best friend.
Jake, I was just as surprised
as you were that she's coming.
But can you go to her Instagram quickly
- and look at it?
- Are you fucking kidding me?!
Oh my God.
Dude, okay, I'm doing it.
- But this is the last time, seriously.
- Dude...
Look at the last photo she posted, man.
Okay, I'm on it.
What... what is it?
Jake, dude, do you see that?
That's... that's some guy's hand
right next to her, man.
You see that?
My God.
That is a baked potato.
Dude, no, it's not.
- That's clearly some guy.
- Yes, it is.
You're tripping.
You're tripping, man.
You are, like, literally losing your mind.
And it doesn't even matter.
Like, look, I love Dana,
I love her to death,
but she's the biggest bitch
I've ever met in my life.
I mean, she broke up with you
for no reason, dude.
Come on.
Give it some time.
Download Tinder,
get yourself laid.
[BEER CAN OPENING]
Now, what time are you gonna be here?
'Cause we are shotgunning beers
at midnight
in every single time zone!
[PEOPLE CHEERING]
There are 24 time zones.
Uh, I gotta go.
It's midnight in Jerusalem, man.
- All right.
- I'll see you soon, okay?
L'Chaim, motherfucker...
[PHONE BEEPING]
Hey, Siri,
remind me in three hours
to let her come to me.
[BEEPING]
SIRI: Okay, I'll remind you.
[HIP-HOP MUSIC CONTINUES]
[CAR HORN HONKING IN DISTANCE]
Shit.
[WHISTLE BLOWING]
SIRI: Obstruction ahead.
New route detected.
[HORNS HONKING]
What?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Seven hours?
What the fuck?
[MUSIC CONTINUES]
[SIGHS]
Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.
Shit.
[PHONE DINGS]
[DING]
[WHOOSH]
[SNIFFLING]
[DING]
[CHUCKLES LIGHTLY]
Not too bad.
[DING]
[SNIFFLES]
[DINGING CONTINUES]
[GAS PUMP CLICKS]
[SIGHS]
SIRI: In two miles,
make a U-turn.
Make a U-turn now.
Shut up!
♪ Game need refreshing,
what you been suggesting ♪
♪ Wrote a new constitution,
we don't need amending ♪
♪ I go Johnnie Cochran
when I'm raisin' my defenses ♪
♪ Man, I feel like Michael Keaton
when a nigga start ascendin' ♪
♪ Never second-guessin',
had to do a lot of restin' ♪
♪ Like I played for Popovich,
tryna find our new direction ♪
♪ Listen, I ain't for the shelvin',
what you niggas tellin' ♪
♪ My team been rebellin' from wherever
you were headin', goddamn ♪
♪ This shit bump like a belly
when it's pregnant ♪
♪ Bonafide big brr lookin' like a Yeti ♪
♪ Swift feet cheetah,
that's a real big kitty ♪
♪ Who made y'all judges,
that's a real ass feeling ♪
♪ I don't like the sly ones,
forget 'em and I dead 'em ♪
♪ Always off the shit
like a constipated reverend ♪
[PHONE CHIMING]
♪ Dumb pun, all fun,
but I make your bitch ♪
♪ Crack a giggle
with the next one ♪
♪ Goofy ass boy,
look like Elmer Fudd's cousin ♪
♪ Heavy-ass feet,
bet Pluto heard you comin' ♪
♪ Actin' like Regina,
you a lil' bit dramatic ♪
♪ I been in the cockpit,
I been in the cabin ♪
♪ Take the ego out, just revolve
around the planet ♪
♪ Damn, I'm like Kirby, man,
I don't take damage ♪
♪ Oh, so hot, so, sst, get branded ♪
♪ I'm just havin' fun,
cops hit me... ♪
- WOMAN: With 5G LTE Wi-Fi...
- [GROANING]
...the all-new Chevy Colorado
lets you hit the road.
[RADIO VOLUME DECREASING]
[PHONE CHIMES]
[GASPS]
[CHIMES]
[CHIMES]
[RADIO VOLUME INCREASING]
♪ Real quick bills
still stacking to the ceiling ♪
♪ What you mean it ain't working ♪
[PHONE RINGING]
Shit.
[TIRES SQUEALING]
[CLEARS THROAT]
Hey, Mom.
[VOICE DISTORTING, CALL CUTTING OUT]
Hello? Hey...
Hey, Mom?
Mom, if you can hear me,
I'll call you back.
Mom?
[PHONE BEEPING]
Motherfucker.
[SIGHS]
[PHONE WHOOSHES]
Shit.
[HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING]
Shit.
[TIRES SCREECHING]
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
[CRASHING]
[PHONE WHOOSHES]